# Male ENTP / Female ISTP. What does he want - platonic or romantic???



## zbrobins (Jun 26, 2013)

Hello:

I'm a female ISTP. I know that technically the male ENTP isn't my pairing. But, it seems our being acquainted has turned into something more. Is he looking for a platonic or romantic relationship? Here's the scenario:

I notice regular signs of attraction: his body language, he always talks to me in mirror image, puffs his chest, talks about what he has to do that week, tomorrow, or in a few months. He says he wants to learn violin, (I teach it). 

But, upon reading about ENTP (which he fits perfectly), I thought that perhaps I'm reading him wrong. I know another woman has been after him. When he talks to her, he's always standing next to her, but never face-to-face. She plays his sports with him. I'm not into sports actually.

He never comes to a violin lesson because he says he's been so busy. He apologizes profusely and says that he doesn't want me to think that he's not serious, it's just got a lot of things on his plate.

We have mutual friends and acquaintainces.

We recently went to a rib festival where two other girls invited themselves to be around him. He decided to come after he found out that I was going with his sister. He spent two hours just hanging with those girls. And when it was picture time, he reached around and said to me, "Sorry, I have to touch you, but I have to reach around. (Group hug) After two hours the girls left. He started talking about the other photos I took and we were bantering back and forth 1.5 hours about a whole bunch of stuff. Then he tells me, "I'm honest and upfront, and some people think I'm cold." I told him, "Well, we've got something in common. I don't like beating around the bush". From that point things became a little less tense.

We had barbeque at someone's house. He would make little quirky comments every time I passed by him. Then a group played a game. I didn't play. About 30 minutes later, some one asked me to play and told me to sit next to my ENTP crush (was that a setup???)

This weekend, we were at someone's house for barbeque. BTW, the girl that's been chasing him went to the beach this day with ENTP crush's sister. The sister wanted to know what I was doing so she could do it with me. I told here I wasn't sure. Just going home (didn't feel well). An hour later I got a text from another friend who heard I wasn't going to the barbeque: "Are you going to try to make it to the barbeque?" I said maybe. I texted my ENTP crush's sister, that I won't be going to the beach but instead to the barbeque. She said she was at the beach. I get to the barbeque, ENTP is there. He pretty much goes where his sister goes, so I was shocked. People were asking where his sister was and his response was, "She's with Rosibel (the girl that likes him). There driving somewhere...I don't know." Shrugs his shoulders.

He stands next to me in line to get food, making his ENTP remarks as usual. We separated. I played ping pong with someone. He was sitting their just watching. He didn't try to play the other games like he was playing earlier. I'm horrible at sports so maybe he was watching how horrible I was. Then, he disappeared. I commented to him earlier that he was in love with his phone. He told me that we were going to have an argument about that. So, I left it alone. But, when he disappeared, I found that he was in the bathroom....a long time. He came out, asked me if I had enough of losing the ping-pong game. I challenged him to a game.

We started playing. Before I knew it, we were in a our second game and everyone had left the game room (another setup possibly???). I was talking a lot of smack during the game. He kept looking at his phone and then finally says, "It's 9pm, I got to get back home so I can get some sleep for work tomorrow. Let's play one more game." (He lives over 40 minutes from where we where doing the barbeque). I go back to talking my smack, and I started talking to him about other stuff while playing ping-pong. Then he says, "This is better. When we can talk and play, you know, have a conversation. Don't you think it's better? Yeah, I like this." We finished the game and he went straight home.

BTW. I am older (34), he's younger (25) = 8.5 year difference. And no, I'm not asking him how he feels. I guess I'm trying to see if I should play this or leave it be. Hate rejection. What do you all think...possible romantic attraction, or strictly platonic??


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## Splendiferocious (Feb 8, 2014)

I enjoyed reading your story, thanks for typing it out! It's interesting for me because I am also crushing on a younger ENTP - the have quite the charisma, don't they? It sounds to me like he is attracted to you (physically) and enjoys flirting with you (because it's an ego boost to see you flirt back) but doesn't consider you a real option or top priority. I wouldn't waste your time on him unless you really do value it as something platonic.


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## TallGreen (May 6, 2017)

If you are really interested in him, you could ask his sister what he is usually like with his romantic partners. The question is how much do you want out this?


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