# Are there any Godly men on this board?



## BearRun (Mar 3, 2017)

Rock Of Ages said:


> Fundamentally, I believe that her premise (sex outside of a relationship is generally harmful for women) is correct. If you get upset by her tone and dismiss her argument as a result then you've kind of missed the forest for the trees.
> 
> Nobody has really even attempted to argue that the inverse is true (women are happier having sex outside of a relationship) so I feel that the majority of female posters who "prefer" this are really just afraid of commitment.
> 
> ...


I think most people, men and women, prefer sex inside relationships. I'll take the word of others who say they prefer sex outside of relationships, I can't relate, but that's their choice. I'd hope they'd be upfront with their sexual partners and everyone operating above board. 

I might not drink or relate to people drinking, but they're welcome to it. But I'd be annoyed with someone ripping drinkers a new asshole. Maybe they drink because they enjoy the taste of alcohol. Maybe they enjoy getting drunk. Or both. I doubt they care what anyone thinks of them or their drinking behavior. Or maybe they're an alcoholic and need empathy. 

I don't know what's going on in their lives but I don't think it's okay to shit on people that might actually need some help. That's what I see her doing. Ignoring her is tacit compliance.


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## BearRun (Mar 3, 2017)

theflame said:


> @Rockofages, I feel I shouldn't have to hook up with a guy I don't want to to keep him around. And even then he doesn't stay. So I'm not going to hook up with someone and he not call me back, anyway...My college guy was already acting weird after he made out with me once or twice, so I didn't trust him to stay even if I did sleep with him and I told him that.
> 
> I flat out told him the way he acted about us just kissing, doesn't really make me wanna sleep with him. If he can get a hold of himself at a later time and can be in a proper relationship, then he can talk to me about wanting to sleep with me again.
> 
> ...


You're not happy. Jesus isn't helping you apparently. 

No one has suggested you need to hook up with anyone.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

@BearRun, I am happy if you stop posting your BS in my threads, thanks. 

And yes, I am happy. I can see you are extremely miserable without Jesus though, that's why you feel the need to insult Him.

Like I said, go to a church, save yourself and see that you'd even become a better person.

Because so far, with the way you are, you aren't better than me at all.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

@BearRun, I find it amusing you think you're "better than me." Oh really? Can you explain how you're better than me? You haven't answered my question...because so far with what you displayed...I don't see anything about you that is better than me. I'm really confused how you are better than me...is it your award winning attitude about Jesus and life? Nope.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

@BearRun, @Veggie, it must be your lack of reading comprehension skills that you think you are "better than me" right? Lol.


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## Acrylic (Dec 14, 2015)

theflame said:


> I hope there are some godly men left. I've noticed a big difference in couples that are about church and couples that aren't. I'm looking for someone who would want to already go to church so I don't have to drag him there.
> 
> Seems like nowadays I'm just meeting men that mainly want to hook up, other than my college hottie who is the exception.
> 
> ...


Hear, hear. In a godless world where man's own self interests is placed above all else, a simple affirmation of natural god given values is seen as heresy. May god bless you, sister, for having the courage to stand up and proclaim such non controversial things in a world that sits in the grasp of the evil one.

In fact, in regards to the grasp of the evil one... why would one have such a repulsed reaction to just a simple stating of good virtues? The gnashing of the teeth, and the condemnation to and fro? I would say the answer is obvious, if one logically follows where the evidence leads. They are possessed by a demon.

theflame, if I ask you "woman, present thy palm unto me, that I may inspect it for I am bored", and at the mere asking of the question, you angrily wished fire and brimstone to rain upon my head... would you think it not somewhat of an overreaction? Maybe a little bit? Therefore, if one has such an overreaction... are they hiding something in that hand that they don't want me to see? They must be. Anyone else, who has nothing to hide, may object to the request... but to make supplication to god to rain fire and brimstone on me? A little much.

So those who reacted as such in this thread? They are possessed by a demon. For the world is lying in the grasp of the evil one. And the word of god that befalls upon such ones would come, not as the liberating light of the lord that it is... but as something to cause nausea, indignation, gnashing of the teeth. Something that brings literal ache to a son of the one called both the betrayer and slanderer... I speak of course of Satan the Devil (the evil one whose grasp the world lies in)

One mustn't kill the messenger... but merely heed the message.

Either way, sister theflame... have thee sought out the companionship of sister @BearRun ? For she is one who has not partaken of the illicit copulation, and as you might surmise... has been accused of being virtuous for it. She, for her part, has proudly worn this label, and displayed it in a place all can see... so that they too can show, that she is saved by the _lord_. Hallelujah, praise god almighty, sister BearRun.

I patiently await and look forward to the day that I marry my wives in holy matrimony. For the lord YHWH did say unto Moses "If he take another wife for himself; her food, her clothing, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish"... and neither will I for all wives acquired after the first; they shall be loved no less.

Hm... now that I mention her, I must admit the thought is crossing my mind (not sinful thoughts! for those heathens wh may be reading my post)... I ought to come to know BearRun as more than a mere name I've seen here and there.

Sister BearRun... how _you_ doin'? Whatsoever art thou up to this evening? For it occurred to me that one such as yourself ought to enjoy a night on the town followed by a wind down at a luxury hotel perhaps, for two? Let me know, my sister, for I would look forward to your company and your athletic ways, your... supple and agile frame bounding effortlessly between the hotel bedroom furniture, your... sinewy thighs rippling as they launch your lithe figure up and down on the bed, as we re-enact one of our long missed activities of fun when we were mere children of god... bouncing on the trampoline.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

theflame said:


> @Rockofages, I feel I shouldn't have to hook up with a guy I don't want to to keep him around. And even then he doesn't stay. So I'm not going to hook up with someone and he not call me back, anyway...My college guy was already acting weird after he made out with me once or twice, so I didn't trust him to stay even if I did sleep with him and I told him that.
> 
> I flat out told him the way he acted about us just kissing, doesn't really make me wanna sleep with him. If he can get a hold of himself at a later time and can be in a proper relationship, then he can talk to me about wanting to sleep with me again.
> 
> I told him people get weird after sex, and if they can't stay friends after all that, then I don't need to hook up with someone and then he not call me back...and believe you me, I did want this man.




On my first date with a girl, I will communicate to her (directly and/or indirectly) that I'm a passionate, creative and intense man, that love is very important to me and that I see marriage and children as central to my identity. That in one sentence gives her all the basic information she needs to know about my priorities and personality before deciding to sleep with me. If a girl has sex with me and then leaves the next day, after knowing that, well...I know she's the shittiest, lowest kind of scum on this earth, and I'll do everything humanly possible to destroy her life  But if I wasn't brave/honest enough to communicate my intentions and desires, I wouldn't be able to assume said girl callously dismissed my feelings as worthless.

I suggest that you do something similar with your dates. I have already figured out three important things about you, that you ought to try and communicate to any man you're attracted to:

1. You're highly conscientious and temperance is your main virtue
2. You're highly sensitive and intuitive
3. You're likely to have "traditional" expectations of a man's role in the relationship

Just say what you want, sincerely and with passion. You will scare away the wrong men and attract the right ones more. Less hookups, more actual relationships.


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## _Ionic (Jul 8, 2016)

theflame said:


> As I said before, I see people's relationships and marriages with and without God...and I see these posters who don't believe in God insulting Jesus himself, and that's not the type of person I'm going to be.
> @Veggie and @BearRun misread what I am saying, that's their issues, not mine. I find it laughable at best that these two think they are "better" than me while they insult Jesus, puh-lease. You know why you two are miserable? Because of the fact that you DON'T have Jesus.


You say you see people relationship's and marriages with and without God, yet you are insulted by the fact that these two posters don't believe in your religion?


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Rock Of Ages said:


> On my first date with a girl, I will communicate to her (directly and/or indirectly) that I'm a passionate, creative and intense man, that love is very important to me and that I see marriage and children as central to my identity. That in one sentence gives her all the basic information she needs to know about my priorities and personality before deciding to sleep with me. If a girl has sex with me and then leaves the next day, after knowing that, well...I know she's the shittiest, lowest kind of scum on this earth, and I'll do everything humanly possible to destroy her life  But if I wasn't brave/honest enough to communicate my intentions and desires, I wouldn't be able to assume said girl callously dismissed my feelings as worthless.
> 
> I suggest that you do something similar with your dates. I have already figured out three important things about you, that you ought to communicate to any man you're attracted to:
> 
> ...


For sure, I told him that I did want to hook up with him, but with one person. Not just once, but many times and he agreed the same things as me. I don't think he has ever been in love before that's why he was acting like that and he has never had a real relationship. Our make-out sessions were pretty intense just for kisses, lol. If we had actually had sex, I don't think he could handle the intensity even though it would have been a really great feeling. I want to talk to him more about it.

I wanted to tell him when I have sex with someone I really, really, like, it's gonna get really intense and he may feel things he's never felt before with anyone so I can see why he's a little iffy...that's like a powerful feeling and it may overwhelm him.

He enjoys his time with me and we're both attracted to each other hanging out as just friends...I honestly don't get him. I told him I did want to date and I did want him to be my real boyfriend but I think it's because of the ages him being in his early 20s and me being in my early 30s but it shouldn't matter since I look his age and we have fun together and we both agree on the main points in a relationship...but with the way he resolves conflicts rather than talking about the problems, he's ignoring me...I told him that's the only reason this could be relationship would fail because he doesn't want to man up and talk about things.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Despotic Ocelot said:


> Hear, hear. In a godless world where man's own self interests is placed above all else, a simple affirmation of natural god given values is seen as heresy. May god bless you, sister, for having the courage to stand up and proclaim such non controversial things in a world that sits in the grasp of the evil one.
> 
> In fact, in regards to the grasp of the evil one... why would one have such a repulsed reaction to just a simple stating of good virtues? The gnashing of the teeth, and the condemnation to and fro? I would say the answer is obvious, if one logically follows where the evidence leads. They are possessed by a demon.
> 
> ...


lol whatever you said there, that was funny. thanks for the chuckles.


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## Parade of Sparrows (Mar 16, 2010)

*Thread warning*

Stop making personal attacks and stop taking the drama into other threads. This has gone on far too long. Any posts made that disregards this here or in any other thread will be actioned. 


1. Do Not Make Personal Attacks
Posts that serve no purpose other than to flame and attack other users annihilate the quality of discussion. You may critique or disdain argument and opinion posted by users, but you may not extend that method to maligning the users themselves. Do not harass or bully other members, which includes the following:
- "type-bullying," which we define as the persistent and unsolicited public questioning of another member's type when they have not expressed such an interest.
- purposefully misgendering other members from the identification they have chosen on their profile.
- unsolicited and especially repeated diagnosis of other members as having a particular personality disorder or mental illness.


2. Do Not Troll
Trolling is not permissible and refers to attempts to derail or disrupt a thread through behavior such as the following:
- making low-quality and/or irrelevant posts
- making provocative and inflammatory comments
- trying to provoke, bait, or flame others.


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## Acrylic (Dec 14, 2015)

.


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## TwoStepsAhead (Feb 21, 2017)

yes my children, i am god the almighty! go fetch some gold for me my children and send it to my paypal asap, don't let me wait!


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Memory of Talon said:


> *Thread warning*
> 
> Stop making personal attacks and stop taking the drama into other threads. This has gone on far too long. Any posts made that disregards this here or in any other thread will be actioned.
> 
> ...


Thanks for that. It was getting tiring that those same posters kept attacking me for everything I was saying when I just wanted to discuss things with people who get what I'm saying and those other posters keep turning my threads into something it's not.


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## Acrylic (Dec 14, 2015)

theflame said:


> I've been attacked by the same handful of individuals who are on their slut defending vendettas.


Hold on... did someone attack Abdon, Abijah, Abraham, Ahab, Ahasuerus, Ashur, Belshazzar, Benhadad, Caleb, David, Eliphaz, Elkanah, Esau, Ezra, Gideon, Hosea, Ibzan, Issachar, Jacob, Joash, Lamech, Machir, Manasseh, Moses, Nahor, Rehoboam, Saul, Shaharaim, Shimei, Solomon, Terah, or Zedekiah just because they had hundreds of sluts?

I have to admit, I didn't read past the first two pages of the thread so far... so if someone if talking shit about Abdon, Abijah, Abraham, Ahab, Ahasuerus, Ashur, Belshazzar, Benhadad, Caleb, David, Eliphaz, Elkanah, Esau, Ezra, Gideon, Hosea, Ibzan, Issachar, Jacob, Joash, Lamech, Machir, Manasseh, Moses, Nahor, Rehoboam, Saul, Shaharaim, Shimei, Solomon, Terah, or Zedekiah...

... then I'm gonna have to fuck someone's shit up. Just saying.


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## Parade of Sparrows (Mar 16, 2010)

theflame said:


> Thanks for that. It was getting tiring that those same posters kept attacking me for everything I was saying when I just wanted to discuss things with people who get what I'm saying and those other posters keep turning my threads into something it's not.


Good, you acknowledge that you have also seen the warning. Make sure you also follow the rules.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Despotic Ocelot said:


> Hold on... did someone attack Abdon, Abijah, Abraham, Ahab, Ahasuerus, Ashur, Belshazzar, Benhadad, Caleb, David, Eliphaz, Elkanah, Esau, Ezra, Gideon, Hosea, Ibzan, Issachar, Jacob, Jehoiachin, Joash, Lamech, Machir, Manasseh, Mered, Moses, Nahor, Rehoboam, Saul, Shaharaim, Shimei, Solomon, Terah, or Zedekiah just because they had hundreds of sluts?
> 
> I have to admit, I didn't read past the first two pages of the thread so far... so if someone if talking shit about Abdon, Abijah, Abraham, Ahab, Ahasuerus, Ashur, Belshazzar, Benhadad, Caleb, David, Eliphaz, Elkanah, Esau, Ezra, Gideon, Hosea, Ibzan, Issachar, Jacob, Jehoiachin, Joash, Lamech, Machir, Manasseh, Mered, Moses, Nahor, Rehoboam, Saul, Shaharaim, Shimei, Solomon, Terah, or Zedekiah...
> 
> ... then I'm gonna have to fuck someone's shit up. Just saying.


They called Jesus a slut which I think was uncalled for just because I want to believe in Him. Not right, hopefully it's over now and we can go back to discussing who still believes in God.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Memory of Talon said:


> Good, you acknowledge that you have also seen the warning. Make sure you also follow the rules.


Oh for sure, I do most of the time. But it's really hard to stay on track sometimes when some posters hijacked my thread and went off topic. I hope my thread will be able to stay on topic now. I don't really care about posters personally to insult them the way they did me because they don't even know me at all. When a person insults me, I tend to do the same thing back, but I know it's pointless so I hope my thread can go back on topic now that they were warned also.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Memory of Talon said:


> Good, you acknowledge that you have also seen the warning. Make sure you also follow the rules.


Also, my thread doesn't really fit in this place...can there be a section made for relationships without sex? I wasn't sure where else to put my thread to get proper responses, @memoryoftalon


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## JayShambles (Aug 9, 2016)

theflame said:


> Also, my thread doesn't really fit in this place...can there be a section made for relationships without sex? I wasn't sure where else to put my thread to get proper responses, @memoryoftalon


I'm sure they'll make a thread section just for you :-/


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## Acrylic (Dec 14, 2015)

theflame said:


> It has been pointless to tell these people how wrong they are when they think they're so right.


Most difficult part of being a Christian.



theflame said:


> Jesus loves everyone, even is accepting of sluts unfortunately


Second most difficult part of being a Christian... but only by a hair. 

Really... if you ask any random Christian what's the most difficult part, it'll be a toss up between this and the first quote.



theflame said:


> don't believe in the right religion like Christianity.


Most difficult part of being a muslim.


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## Another Lost Cause (Oct 6, 2015)

theflame said:


> It's really sad though just by this board alone how many people can't last with someone without having sex. Sad at this rating as well.
> 
> If some of ya'll went to church, you'd see how much would change in your relationships with men and other people.
> It wouldn't be so negative. Shame.


Even though I'm an atheist, I think I can see your point. I had a very devout gf who I attended church with, and I can see how it can be a bonding experience when both share and participate in a spiritual life. I liked how my gf could separate herself from worldly things. I think such truly spiritual people are actually pretty rare though, even among church goers. I think it requires a certain configuration of personality.


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## Mange (Jan 9, 2011)

.


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## atamagasuita (May 15, 2016)

I believe.  

Because if i don't then I'll be a worse version of myself. What you see is already an improved one because of Him.  

My weakness is just my sexual humour xD


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## Blue Ribbon (Sep 4, 2016)

theflame said:


> @Peter, I don't understand those people, either. I'm confused by @BearRun and @Veggie. @BearRun hasn't slept around with anyone apparently, but she seems to be offended by me calling sluts/whores sluts/whores. You'd think, she'd be along with it considering her background. It has been pointless to tell these people how wrong they are when they think they're so right. And they are decades younger than me thinking they have more logic than me who has actually lived life.


The point is - the women who you call sluts/whores don't actually think they're sluts/whores. Neither do I. That's where the argument comes from. 

That being said, I dislike how prostitutes are degraded in society. You'd be surprised what poverty does to people. Or how women and children can be groomed or manipulated into it. It's a very sad thing.



theflame said:


> @Veggie, people like you are really the main reason I choose to believe in something out there. I see how some of you are about life and man, I can see myself start to go down your path if I don't believe in the right religion like Christianity.


I just wanted to point out - I dislike how you condemn people for their religious beliefs. I'm a Hindu by culture and I'm virtuous as much as you are. Maybe more so than you. 



Rock Of Ages said:


> Fundamentally, I believe that her premise (sex outside of a relationship is generally harmful for women) is correct. If you get upset by her tone and dismiss her argument as a result then you've kind of missed the forest for the trees.
> 
> Nobody has really even attempted to argue that the inverse is true (women are happier having sex outside of a relationship) so I feel that the majority of female posters who "prefer" this are really just afraid of commitment.
> 
> ...


I actually agree with this post. Sex is emotional to a lot of people and it's wrong to trick people into thinking you want intimacy when all you want is to sleep with them and leave the next day. But you have to understand why the OP is making people angry? 

Also she's not a 1. She's way too reactive. 8 or 6 is a better suit for her. 1 is a passive type and we hardly express anger outwardly. 



theflame said:


> @Rockofages, I feel I shouldn't have to hook up with a guy I don't want to to keep him around. And even then he doesn't stay. So I'm not going to hook up with someone and he not call me back, anyway...My college guy was already acting weird after he made out with me once or twice, so I didn't trust him to stay even if I did sleep with him and I told him that.
> 
> I flat out told him the way he acted about us just kissing, doesn't really make me wanna sleep with him. If he can get a hold of himself at a later time and can be in a proper relationship, then he can talk to me about wanting to sleep with me again.
> 
> ...


You said casual sex is okay and yet in the other thread you said women should try to 'play hard to get.' I'm trying to reconcile the two? I'd like you to explain this? 



atamagasuita said:


> I believe.
> 
> Because if i don't then I'll be a worse version of myself. What you see is already an improved one because of Him.
> 
> My weakness is just my sexual humour xD


Aww that is sooo sweet.  I like your sexual humor. Please don't change


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## BlackLikeMySoul (Sep 7, 2015)

theflame said:


> With women who condone sleeping around and enabling men sleeping around, it's hard to find a guy who can hang out and not hook up at all.


Don't blame the women for the man's lack of character. 
Any man can avoid sleeping around when there are no women willing to have casual sex with him. Not every man can avoid sleeping around even when given the option. It is the ability to say 'no' that makes the difference, not the lack of temptation. 

No, I'm not saying a man can only be good if he doesn't sleep around, or that a man who sleeps around automatically lacks character. I'm just saying that whatever makes this trait of not sleeping around attractive for you, has nothing to do with the women offering - it has to do with the man choosing.


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## Peter (Feb 27, 2010)

Veggie said:


> Blah, blah, blah, blah.
> 
> I have no counterpoint and I'm not intelligent enough to give a self aware answer once called out. All I care about is trying to convince everyone I'm winning. (Because I'm ugly with a small dick and no sense of humor? < we don't know. Some might assume).
> 
> I get it pretty good and I think I showcased that


Well, you showcased something. :smile:


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

atamagasuita said:


> I believe.
> 
> Because if i don't then I'll be a worse version of myself. What you see is already an improved one because of Him.
> 
> My weakness is just my sexual humour xD


Yep, that's why I want to believe, too...because I don't want to be like the people who are without Jesus. One of my elder lady church friends, her husband just up and left her and her two children without a word...and rather than doing things to make her life worse about it, she's actually taking it pretty well because she believes. I can't imagine what her life would be like without the belief.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

AwkwardShorty said:


> Don't blame the women for the man's lack of character.
> Any man can avoid sleeping around when there are no women willing to have casual sex with him. Not every man can avoid sleeping around even when given the option. It is the ability to say 'no' that makes the difference, not the lack of temptation.
> 
> No, I'm not saying a man can only be good if he doesn't sleep around, or that a man who sleeps around automatically lacks character. I'm just saying that whatever makes this trait of not sleeping around attractive for you, has nothing to do with the women offering - it has to do with the man choosing.


 @AwkwardShorty, no it has to do with most women choosing because most men these days expect it since most women do give it up. Imagine, you think most men would be the way they are if every woman denied them sex outside of a relationship? I think they'd take the hint that not all women are like that. Because most women are, they think I am, too.


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## Flying Triangle (Feb 10, 2017)

There _is_ a bit of a post-modern, nihilistic-bent these days which is where you see the decay of traditional morality. 

To dispense with what worked in the past and call into question: What is moral? And WHY is what you advocate for "moral?" If we're all equal, each one of us are morally equal, and therefore no standard morality exists."

I prefer to go against this grain of thought. Holding to moral principles based on the local Judeo-Christian traditions for my own discipline. 

Deus Vult, sister.


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## Desthro (Feb 18, 2016)

@theflame

I have a few questions regarding your faith and this subject matter-

*If you truly believe in the almighty, why not Pray and wait for your answer? Or does God work too slowly for you?

*Do you think that coming to a personality forum and asking if such people exist is a part of God's plan for you?

*Why not be patient as instructed in many places in the Bible and accept that God has a plan for you and what is yours will be rendered upon you in due time?


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## Blue Ribbon (Sep 4, 2016)

Desthro said:


> @theflame
> 
> I have a few questions regarding your faith and this subject matter-
> 
> ...


Omg you should see her other threads xD


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## BlackLikeMySoul (Sep 7, 2015)

theflame said:


> @AwkwardShorty, no it has to do with most women choosing *because most men these days expect it* since most women do give it up. Imagine, you think most men would be the way they are if every woman denied them sex outside of a relationship? I think they'd take the hint that not all women are like that. Because most women are, they think I am, too.


Do you think these women having sex with men outside relationships would be able to do so without a man choosing to have sex with them? Why is it automatically the fault of the women, and not the men, when they both make the same choice? If every man denied a woman sex outside of a relationship, no men would have sex outside relationships - or better yet, if every man denied themselves sex outside relationships, no men would have sex outside relationships. And as I understand it, that is a man you want: a _man_ who doesn't have sex outside relationships, so why do you focus on what other women are doing? As long as there is no actual force (e.g. rape), the man is making the choice to have sex by himself, and is therefore to blame as much as the woman he is with. Also, do you think the man is never the one to initiate the sex? What makes the man faultless and the woman guilty when they both make the same choice? 

Personally, if I was looking for a man who didn't have sex outside the relationship, I would look for someone who would stay loyal despite temptation, and not only when there is no temptation at all.


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## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)

Some of the horniest guys I ever met were church guys. (youth groups were notorious for random hook ups and I have a number of friends who lost their virginity at church functions)
As someone who grew up in church, I haven't found (through my own experience and the experience of my friends) the caliber of men there any better than those who don't attend regularly. About even I'd say.


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## Euclid (Mar 20, 2014)

Deus vult!






Don't mind the infidels sister, they are just trolling...


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## deviants (Dec 16, 2016)

Euclid said:


> Deus vult!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


This is hardcore tbh


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

stormyrainshadow said:


> Some of the horniest guys I ever met were church guys. (youth groups were notorious for random hook ups and I have a number of friends who lost their virginity at church functions)
> As someone who grew up in church, I haven't found (through my own experience and the experience of my friends) the caliber of men there any better than those who don't attend regularly. About even I'd say.


I'd have a better chance at meeting a guy at church who wants to hang out than ones outside of church who just want to hit it and quit it. I've noticed a difference. Irregardless if church guys are horny, they still hang out with me as a friend, too, unlike the ones I meet outside of church. @stormyrainshadow


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## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)

theflame said:


> I'd have a better chance at meeting a guy at church who wants to hang out than ones outside of church who just want to hit it and quit it. I've noticed a difference. Irregardless if church guys are horny, they still hang out with me as a friend, too, unlike the ones I meet outside of church. @*stormyrainshadow*


Those are still broad generalizations on behalf of both church guys and non church guys. 
There are plenty of non church guys who want to just hang out and plenty of church guys who would wam, bam thank you ma'am.
But, if you think you can met better guys at church, knock yourself out.

I mean, I met my husband at work and we didn't have sex until we had been dating almost a year. The guy I dated before him tried to get me to screw him in a confessional after we'd only been talking a few weeks.


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

I thought godly men = divine good looks


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

Withholding sex from a man who likes you to "test" his loyalty and values is the most reliable way to make him leave. If you are attracted to someone, why not sleep with them? I don't understand why "virtuous" women feel that men will appreciate them less for showing us how much they want us. There is nothing immoral about taking a guy out of the market...sensually.

I have no patience for a woman who plays games with me anymore. It is totally beneath my dignity. Men who allows themselves to be led along for weeks, months, years even deserve all the misery they get. Put your foot down and set some boundaries for what you'll tolerate.

Be results-oriented. If you want reliable access to sex, having a steady, exclusive girlfriend is generally your best option, at least in my opinion (high investment, but also high reward). But from the man's perspective, the benefits hinge on sexual frequency. No sex, and I'm suddenly staring down a pretty shitty deal.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Rock Of Ages said:


> Withholding sex from a man who likes you to "test" his loyalty and values is the most reliable way to make him leave. If you are attracted to someone, why not sleep with them? I don't understand why "virtuous" women feel that men will appreciate them less for showing us how much they want us. There is nothing slutty about taking a guy out of the market...sensually.
> 
> I have no patience for a woman who plays games with me anymore. It is totally beneath my dignity. Men who allows themselves to be led along for weeks, months, years even without any reward for their efforts deserve all the misery they get.
> 
> Be results-oriented. If you want reliable access to sex, having a steady, exclusive girlfriend is generally your best option (high investment, but also high reward). But at least to me, this is totally conditional on the sex part. No sex, and I'm suddenly staring down a pretty shitty deal.


Plus, you don't know if a person has STD or not and you don't know if a person is married or not or lying about their single status.
I knew a friend who had a child with someone she thought was single. Turns out he was hiding a wife and three other children and now she is stuck with him as the father of her baby because she thought she could trust him. @RockofAges

It's not games, it's making sure I'm not stuck in a situation I don't want to be in.


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## Flying Triangle (Feb 10, 2017)

AwkwardShorty said:


> Do you think these women having sex with men outside relationships would be able to do so without a man choosing to have sex with them? Why is it automatically the fault of the women, and not the men, when they both make the same choice?


Most females in the animal kingdom do the choosing regarding sex. Afterall, if it were true that men chose sex the 1 in 4 women are raped statistic would actually be true. Heck, it might even be bumped up to 3 in 4 women being raped. 








> If every man denied a woman sex outside of a relationship, no men would have sex outside relationships - or better yet, if every man denied themselves sex outside relationships, no men would have sex outside relationships.


You're trying to invert the genders here. 



> And as I understand it, that is a man you want: a _man_ who doesn't have sex outside relationships,...


The Godly Man. 



> ...so why do you focus on what other women are doing?


Slut shaming. 



> As long as there is no actual force (e.g. rape), the man is making the choice to have sex by himself, and is therefore to blame as much as the woman he is with. Also, do you think the man is never the one to initiate the sex? What makes the man faultless and the woman guilty when they both make the same choice?


Sex with sluts is consensual sex, I agree. 



> Personally, if I was looking for a man who didn't have sex outside the relationship, I would look for someone who would stay loyal despite temptation, and not only when there is no temptation at all.


The Godly Man.

otherwise:


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

No one has to listen to what I'm saying and I'm not going to change my way of thinking. Just don't complain if you're stuck in a situation you don't want to be in because you had sex with someone thinking that's a way to keep someone. You can do your way and I'll continue to do mine. I know a 40-year-old friend who is recently engaged and he didn't even make out with her until they were engaged a year later and they are married.

So there are people out there I don't have to have sex with right away to keep them, very slim, unfortunately.

My guy knows I would be good in bed so I am not sure why he doesn't want to commit -- because there's too many women to talk to out there at his early 20s age to just stay with one.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

theflame said:


> Plus, you don't know if a person has STD or not and you don't know if a person is married or not or lying about their single status.


You can figure that out pretty quickly by asking values questions. Most men have actually only had 2 or 3 sexual partners, ever (they are probably lying if they say otherwise).

STDs are basically a problem because of a small minority of men who are highly promiscuous and able to access women readily. Women are the "incubators" of the STDs (heterosexual women have a higher frequency of pretty much every STD than hetero men, make what you will of that) and pass it on unwittingly to other men.

If you're uncomfortable just ask a guy to put on a condom.



theflame said:


> I knew a friend who had a child with someone she thought was single. Turns out he was hiding a wife and three other children and now she is stuck with him as the father of her baby because she thought she could trust him. @RockofAges
> 
> It's not games, it's making sure I'm not stuck in a situation I don't want to be in.


This sounds like a pretty unusual situation. Most single men actually are single. But we hate being forced to wait for sex. Patience is not a virtue of mine in general - if I can't get what I want from someone/something quickly, I assume nothing's on the cards and just go somewhere else to try my luck.


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## Blue Ribbon (Sep 4, 2016)

theflame said:


> No one has to listen to what I'm saying and I'm not going to change my way of thinking. Just don't complain if you're stuck in a situation you don't want to be in because you had sex with someone thinking that's a way to keep someone. You can do your way and I'll continue to do mine. I know a 40-year-old friend who is recently engaged and he didn't even make out with her until they were engaged a year later and they are married.
> 
> So there are people out there I don't have to have sex with right away to keep them, very slim, unfortunately.
> 
> My guy knows I would be good in bed so I am not sure why he doesn't want to commit -- because there's too many women to talk to out there at his early 20s age to just stay with one.


Age has very little to do with it. If your guy really wanted you he would have committed to you


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## Euclid (Mar 20, 2014)

Rock Of Ages said:


> Withholding sex from a man who likes you to "test" his loyalty and values is the most reliable way to make him leave.


It's a reliable way filtering out bad men.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

I can hardly recognize some of my posts yesterday, they seem so low energy.

Like I always say, I wake up an 8 in the morning and I'm a 4 by the time I go to bed.

Any single ladies looking for a lunchtime service?


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## BlackLikeMySoul (Sep 7, 2015)

Flying Triangle said:


> Most females in the animal kingdom do the choosing regarding sex. Afterall, if it were true that men chose sex the 1 in 4 women are raped statistic would actually be true. Heck, it might even be bumped up to 3 in 4 women being raped.
> 
> You're trying to invert the genders here.
> 
> ...


Actually I wouldn't look for a Godly man, I don't think loyalty has anything to do with any god. It is just a matter of mutual respect - you don't need gods for that. 



Flying Triangle said:


> otherwise:


Enlighten me, Terminator.


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## Marshy (Apr 10, 2016)

JayShambles said:


> I truly believe that even Christians and other "genuinely" religious people themselves would be embarrassed for you. Try and understand your real motives behind your actions and work from there.
> 
> You are a joke


"I don't agree with you therefore you *must* be a joke."
Way to differentiate yourself from no one ever.
I think she posted in the wrong thread section thingy though. Clearly it seems this was used to invoke a reaction and you fell for it. Not a theist at all but never understood the blind hostility towards them. Guess I just can't stand mob mentality.


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## Blue Ribbon (Sep 4, 2016)

Marshy14 said:


> "I don't agree with you therefore you *must* be a joke."
> Way to differentiate yourself from no one ever.
> I think she posted in the wrong thread section thingy though. Not a theist at all but never understood the hostility towards them


But Marshy she's mean to people


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

RockofAges, yeah my friend's situation is pretty unique. Haven't heard of a guy being able to hide a wife and three other kids for eight years. Since I know someone personally, scares me enough to not hook up anymore. People can't be honest about being single. That's another reason why I don't date older guys. They have more chances to hide a family.


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## Flying Triangle (Feb 10, 2017)

Blue Ribbon said:


> Age has very little to do with it.


Incorrect. Age = the difference of fertile/infertile. This is Old Testament stuff. 



> If your guy really wanted you he would have committed to you


Correct.


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## Flying Triangle (Feb 10, 2017)

AwkwardShorty said:


> Actually I wouldn't look for a Godly man, I don't think loyalty has anything to do with any god. It is just a matter of mutual respect - you don't need gods for that.


Sure.



> Enlighten me, Terminator.


You sound plenty enlightened.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

theflame said:


> RockofAges, yeah my friend's situation is pretty unique. Haven't heard of a guy being able to hide a wife and three other kids for eight years. Since I know someone personally, scares me enough to not hook up anymore. People can't be honest about being single. That's another reason why I don't date older guys. They have more chances to hide a family.


I tend to attract older (27 - 31) women because they're more confident, worldly and aware of the kind of man they want. I can't express enough how much easier it is to talk to a girl without the mindless, flitty skirting around important issues. We're a man and a woman, we both know why we're here, we want to assess each other's character and figure out whether she should have sex with me (I've already decided XD). The problem is, though, that they want children ASAP and I don't. I am really best suited to a younger (20 - 23) woman who is marriage-minded and more mature emotionally than her peers. Sadly, I often feel like these kinds of women are unicorns. They either don't exist, or are actually trannies instead.

Again, and I will keep saying this until the day I die - I hate indecisive people. Their "casualness", the lack of energy and purpose makes me fucking mad.

My sexual age is probably somewhere around 13...LOL


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## Marshy (Apr 10, 2016)

Blue Ribbon said:


> But Marshy she's mean to people


Doesn't matter. I don't agree with her at all, but I wouldn't just say "durrr youre a fool hurr durr." When it comes to theology its really hard to prove or disprove anything, hence why when we were enlightened by modern innovations in science people tend to take a more metaphorical approach to religious texts (at least that would be the smart thing to do in that situation.) When it comes to calling people fools because of their beliefs its just nothing but the individual's philosophy vs the others philosophy/beliefs. Its really a pointless mess that only results in moving each party further apart


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## JayShambles (Aug 9, 2016)

Marshy14 said:


> "I don't agree with you therefore you *must* be a joke."
> Way to differentiate yourself from no one ever.
> I think she posted in the wrong thread section thingy though. Clearly it seems this was used to invoke a reaction and you fell for it. Not a theist at all but never understood the blind hostility towards them. Guess I just can't stand mob mentality.


It's not really a personal attack against religion buddy. But if you weren't around I guess you wouldn't really know


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## BlackLikeMySoul (Sep 7, 2015)

Rock Of Ages said:


> I can hardly recognize some of my posts yesterday, they seem so low energy.
> 
> Like I always say, I wake up an 8 in the morning and I'm a 4 by the time I go to bed.
> 
> *Any single ladies looking for a lunchtime service?*


That escalated quickly.



Flying Triangle said:


> Sure.
> You sound plenty enlightened.


Finally; acceptance. Oh, joy.


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## Marshy (Apr 10, 2016)

JayShambles said:


> It's not really a personal attack against religion buddy. But if you weren't around I guess you wouldn't really know


Why would I take it as a personal attack against religion and why would I care? You are probably right though, from what I hear she sound annoying. see post above your quote


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## JayShambles (Aug 9, 2016)

Marshy14 said:


> Why would I take it as a personal attack against religion and why would I care? You are probably right though, from what I hear she sound annoying. see post above your quote


Yeah, regardless, the point is that I don't like OP. 

There's really nothing else to it.

Don't need to try get specific about things. It's just a waste of time


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## Marshy (Apr 10, 2016)

JayShambles said:


> Yeah, regardless, the point is that I don't like OP.
> 
> There's really nothing else to it.
> 
> Don't need to try get specific about things. It's just a waste of time


o


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## Blue Ribbon (Sep 4, 2016)

Marshy14 said:


> Doesn't matter. I don't agree with her at all, but I wouldn't just say "durrr youre a fool hurr durr." When it comes to theology its really hard to prove or disprove anything, hence why when we were enlightened by modern innovations in science people tend to take a more metaphorical approach to religious texts (at least that would be the smart thing to do in that situation.) When it comes to calling people fools because of their beliefs its just nothing but the individual's philosophy vs the others philosophy/beliefs. Its really a pointless mess that only results in moving each party further apart


I disagree with the whole premise of relying on theology for ethics. Not because it's wrong, but because a lot of people don't know how to do it correctly. This is one of the reasons I believe that the existance of God is a philosophical question and not a theological or even a scientific question. Philosophy deals with entire systems of ethics. If she were arguing from such a perspective, it would be more entertaining to debate with her. But she has shown no interest in examining her ethical view points and has just been exerting 'I'm right' over and over again. I can give clear and concise reasons as to why she's wrong and I'm right and these would be fundamental differences between us we could learn to accept. 

Even for the religious, faith doesn't need to be just 'believing in Jesus' or whatever. There are intelligent ways to approach this. I guess that's why I haven't been giving servious replies; I know I will be wasting my time. You're wasting yours too.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

AwkwardShorty said:


> That escalated quickly.


It could escalate further.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Rock Of Ages said:


> I tend to attract older (27 - 31) women because they're more confident, worldly and aware of the kind of man they want. I can't express enough how much easier it is to talk to a girl without the mindless, flitty skirting around important issues. We're a man and a woman, we both know why we're here, we want to assess each other's character and figure out whether she should have sex with me (I've already decided XD). The problem is, though, that they want children ASAP and I don't. I am really best suited to a younger (20 - 23) woman who is marriage-minded and more mature emotionally than her peers. Sadly, I often feel like these kinds of women are unicorns. They either don't exist, or are actually trannies instead.
> 
> Again, and I will keep saying this until the day I die - I hate indecisive people. Their "casualness", the lack of energy and purpose makes me fucking mad.
> 
> My sexual age is probably somewhere around 13...LOL


I'm not indecisive. I've told my guy I want a relationship with him but he's the one who is back and forth about it because I'm older and this would be his very first relationship with someone nine years older. I can already feel it's a lot for him as a first relationship. He can't treat me like I'm in my early 20s also just like him and he can't act the same as he would be if I was his age. He can get away with a lot of stuff with a girl his age, but he won't be able to get away with much things if he were to be with me. He'd have to be a lot more mature and discuss things, not avoid problems like he's doing right now.


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## Marshy (Apr 10, 2016)

Blue Ribbon said:


> You're wasting yours too.


No!!! this rule doesnt apply to me! Im special ;_;

I do agree with the first paragraph though, pretty much sums it up.


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## Blue Ribbon (Sep 4, 2016)

Marshy14 said:


> No!!! this rule doesnt apply to me! Im special ;_;
> 
> I do agree with the first paragraph though, pretty much sums it up.


Omg you're cute. This is why I love INTPs. And look! ESFJs can be smart too xD


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## septic tank (Jul 21, 2013)

my dick is godly lol


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

theflame said:


> I'm not indecisive. I've told my guy I want a relationship with him but he's the one who is back and forth about it because I'm older and this would be his very first relationship with someone nine years older. I can already feel it's a lot for him as a first relationship. He can't treat me like I'm in my early 20s also just like him and he can't act the same as he would be if I was his age. He can get away with a lot of stuff with a girl his age, but he won't be able to get away with much things if he were to be with me. He'd have to be a lot more mature and discuss things, not avoid problems like he's doing right now.


If he can't decide when he wants then leave. You will make yourself more miserable if you stay.

It isn't your problem that he lack the willpower to make binary choices. People who avoid discussing problems bottle them up instead, which means it all comes out at once, and only after they've decided you are of no use to them anymore.

Leave him. Period.


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## BlackLikeMySoul (Sep 7, 2015)

Rock Of Ages said:


> It could escalate further.


Lucky me.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Rock Of Ages said:


> If he can't decide when he wants then leave. You will make yourself more miserable if you stay.
> 
> It isn't your problem that he lack the willpower to make binary choices. People who avoid discussing problems bottle them up instead, which means it all comes out at once, and only after they've decided you are of no use to them anymore.
> 
> Leave him. Period.


I definitely stopped talking to him for now. I told him when he wants to be a grown up and talk about things, he can let me know. I told him for now he can run away like a little child and if that's how he wants to be then he should talk to a girl his age. He already knew I didn't have much tolerance for him being that younger, but since he was hanging out with me regularly more than any older guy was, I was willing to give him a chance since he was making a lot of time for me and I didn't have to beg him for time. He wanted to hang out with me.


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## master of time and space (Feb 16, 2017)

Dammit, 

I misread this as "are there any god like men on this board"

I'll say no more


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

master of time and space said:


> Dammit,
> 
> I misread this as "are there any god like men on this board"
> 
> I'll say no more


Lol my guy is literally both a godly man and a god like man. He's training to be a MMA Fighter. Ugh, he's literally everything I'm looking for in someone. Great personality, too. Just wish he wasn't so indecisive about dating. He knows he has a great time with me, but because of the age difference that's getting to him. He already knew I was older in the beginning. It shouldn't bother him the age since I look as young as him and no one could ever tell unless I said something.


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

theflame said:


> Lol my guy is literally both a godly man and a god like man. He's training to be a MMA Fighter. Ugh, he's literally everything I'm looking for in someone. Great personality, too. Just wish he wasn't so indecisive about dating. He knows he has a great time with me, but because of the age difference that's getting to him. He already knew I was older in the beginning. It shouldn't bother him the age since I look as young as him and no one could ever tell unless I said something.


Perhaps it's other things and not your age, or your looks.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Red Panda said:


> Perhaps it's other things and not your age, or your looks.


 @RedPanda, Nope, he hangs out with me a lot so he knows how I am. And if it was my "personality" as you're trying to imply, well I don't think he would spend every other day with me for 6 hours a time any time of the day for a month straight and I don't think he would make that much time for me if it really was my "personality" to him that was the issue. I let him do what he wanted with the dating and didn't push him with it. He's the one that asked to hold my hand, etc. etc. I was fine hanging out as friends but I did let him know I did want to be official, but it didn't have to be right now...whenever he is ready or wants to.

If I misread your post, I think it might be because he's the one who is younger, and not me being older.


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

theflame said:


> @RedPanda, Nope, he hangs out with me a lot so he knows how I am. And if it was my "personality" as you're trying to imply, well I don't think he would spend every other day with me for 6 hours a time any time of the day for a month straight and I don't think he would make that much time for me if it really was my "personality" to him that was the issue. I let him do what he wanted with the dating and didn't push him with it. He's the one that asked to hold my hand, etc. etc. I was fine hanging out as friends but I did let him know I did want to be official, but it didn't have to be right now...whenever he is ready or wants to.
> 
> If I misread your post, I think it might be because he's the one who is younger, and not me being older.


Well perhaps he enjoys your company so far, but he is unsure if he wants more? I mean, he might still be at the getting to know you phase. Wanting to be your friend and see where it goes. I mean, are you sure it's the age thing? Has he actually told you that?


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Red Panda said:


> Well perhaps he enjoys your company so far, but he is unsure if he wants more? I mean, he might still be at the getting to know you phase. Wanting to be your friend and see where it goes. I mean, are you sure it's the age thing? Has he actually told you that?


He says he doesn't care my age, but just by how he acts so unsure I think it's about the age difference. We have a lot of common interests and like hanging out. I told him I don't want kids right now just because I'm older doesn't mean I want kids, though he might think that. His actions don't match his words. I told him I wish he would be truthful with me because he's acting totally different than what he's saying. If he needs time, I said that's fine. I have my things to work on in the mean time. And hopefully he won't have found someone else while I get the things I need for my life. Right now, I'm not in a very good situation to date, but I liked hanging out with him and he looked like he was going to stick around so I thought I would give it a shot. I think Him being more mature for his age is overwhelming him and he just wants to act his age and not be so serious. That's the vibe I get.


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## Blue Ribbon (Sep 4, 2016)

@Because_why_not like I promised


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

@blueRibbon, you're really mature letting people know about my threads. I saw what you wrote on people's walls. I'm glad I am the center of your world, but unfortunately, you aren't mine.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

@blueribbon, you say you're dating someone from Perc? What does he think about your immaturity and attention seeking posts? He's attracted to that?


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

theflame said:


> He says he doesn't care my age, but just by how he acts so unsure I think it's about the age difference. We have a lot of common interests and like hanging out. I told him I don't want kids right now just because I'm older doesn't mean I want kids, though he might think that. His actions don't match his words. I told him I wish he would be truthful with me because he's acting totally different than what he's saying. If he needs time, I said that's fine. I have my things to work on in the mean time. And hopefully he won't have found someone else while I get the things I need for my life. Right now, I'm not in a very good situation to date, but I liked hanging out with him and he looked like he was going to stick around so I thought I would give it a shot. I think Him being more mature for his age is overwhelming him and he just wants to act his age and not be so serious. That's the vibe I get.


Maybe he is looking into the future more and sees it as not exactly desirable, yet he likes hanging out with you so he's not trying to progress things more. You may say you don't want kids now, but given your age difference, by the time you might want them it might still be too early for him.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Red Panda said:


> Maybe he is looking into the future more and sees it as not exactly desirable, yet he likes hanging out with you so he's not trying to progress things more. You may say you don't want kids now, but given your age difference, by the time you might want them it might still be too early for him.


I think you're right. It just sucks that it can't work out with him because we do like hanging out but we both know we can't be just friends and since he doesn't want to make the efforts right now as more, we just stopped talking. It would be driving me nuts every other day one day he'd act like my boyfriend being all cuddly then the next not. I told him he needs to come back when he knows exactly what he wants. I can't keep pretending like nothing happened the next day when we just had an intense make out session the day before, and then he act like nothing happened the next day, lol.


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