# What do SJ's think of SP's?



## Zeri (Jan 23, 2018)

Interesting. I like hearing about relationship compatibility. Can I segway a bit on this thread and ask you both which type you think would be good matches for Istps, and esfjs respectively? Based on experience or just your own theory.


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## aerstyu (Mar 3, 2021)

Zeri said:


> Interesting. I like hearing about relationship compatibility. Can I segway a bit on this thread and ask you both which type you think would be good matches for Istps, and esfjs respectively? Based on experience or just your own theory.


Sure!  For ISTPs, I've seen a lot of people in the MBTI community saying they are compatible with ESTXs, which I think I agree with. From there I think it would depend on if one would rather be with someone who shares their functions and can help them _further_ develop the functions in their stack (in this case ESTP) or someone who has opposite functions and can help them take on a new perspective on things (in this case ESTJ). Personally I would like to develop my current functions, especially Se and Fe, so I think I would go with ESTP, though this might be different for other ISTPs.

For ESFJs, I think it would be somewhat similar. I've seen them being paired with ISXPs a lot, though it seems like most ISTPs and ESFJs themselves seem to disagree for the most part. I think ESFJs' Si would make them want a stable and predictable relationship, so I am a little iffy about Se, though I can still kind of see ISFP. I think ISFX maybe (I can kind of see ISTJ too), and from there I think it would depend on the same thing I said in the ISTP section - whether they find themselves to be more compatible with someone who has the same functions and can help each other develop them (ISFJ) or if they would prefer someone who has opposite functions (ISFP).


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## Lady of Redstones (Apr 28, 2021)

Zeri said:


> Interesting. I like hearing about relationship compatibility. Can I segway a bit on this thread and ask you both which type you think would be good matches for Istps, and esfjs respectively? Based on experience or just your own theory.


I actually once took the test, but instead of answering for myself, I chose the answers that an imagined "ideal partner" would give. The result was ISFJ, a.k.a. someone more or less like me, but more introverted. That idea was more or less born because I had heard that introverts and extroverts attract each other, and as I mostly identify with "ambivert" (= in between intro- and extroverted, I would estimate that I am about 55% extroverted) that really made me wonder for what type I should look out in dating (I am single)... So I took the test ;-) 

My experiences so far are that I always preferred introverts as partners. But my past relationships were all before I started learning about the MBTI types. Plus, as a teenager and in my early 20ies (I will turn 30 this summer) I wasn't looking for the same things in a relationship as I am now. So I don't really have much experience, right now I have my theory that an ISxJ (I can imagine istj would work as well as isfj) would be best for me, because I prefer sharing and further developing my functions (especially Si and Fe) to developing others. 
I am not sure whether I would get along with an xNFx - on one hand I'm rather sceptical about that, but on the other hand, the SJs I recently dated seemed as if they were _too_ focused on details, not at all seeing bigger pictures, maybe even too strict... But maybe I was disappointed because they didn't share my values, which are of course important as well.

So that's my experience, for the theoretical site, I agree with @aerstyu ;-)


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## Zeri (Jan 23, 2018)

Cool - thanks to you both for sharing!


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## alcobow (12 mo ago)

Adore them. They are pretty cool. Somewhere we are similar. 
Actually I don't understand SJ's anymore than SP's...ironically...


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