# The art of Female seduction, from a diagnosed sociopath...



## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Okay, so this interesting individual recently came to my attention. She claims to be a diagnosed sociopath, and is allegedly the answer to the ever growing online manosphere.

I don't really have much of an opinion about her at this point or what she says, but I'd LOVE to hear others thoughts....






Edit: Am I inviting chaos by posting this? Lmao. I promise to do my best to moderate this discussion if it sparks interest 🤪


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## Ms. Aligned (Aug 26, 2021)

Well she just cured me from dating. So there's that.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

I wish I could say it's interesting to see people coming into contact with information. Like a toddler squishing a plushie to learn that this one is soft and the other makes a squeaky sound, but it isn't. 

The fuck do you say when you're 20 generations ahead of all this shit? I know. Sex. Yeah. Sex works.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

MH17 said:


> I wish I could say it's interesting to see people coming into contact with information. Like a toddler squishing a plushie to learn that this one is soft and the other makes a squeaky sound, but it isn't.
> 
> The fuck do you say when you're 20 generations ahead of all this shit? I know. Sex. Yeah. Sex works.


Ngl, this went over my head


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

I feel the focus on power dynamics is more interesting than sex?

Unless you are counting sex as a form of power dynamic


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> I feel the focus on power dynamics is more interesting than sex?
> 
> Unless you are counting sex as a form of power dynamic


Idk what 'ngl' means, but I refuse to pay for the premium to find out. 

My opinion: she's another boring slob among 7 billion boring slobs who are entirely alike, so the only way to generate some interest is to create another magic spell. Bobidi-bibidu-bum: IM A SOCIOPAAATH  So I'm not just another human. I'm like a glittery, shiny, new version. So watch on. I can explain how I'm exactly like everybody you've ever met and will meet, but you'll be under the spell of the 'sociopath' magic buzz word so you won't notice. Not like you can connect any dots to see that I'm everybody anyway. Views ads, and keep em dollars coming. 

Thanxzs!


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

@MH17 

Ngl is "not gonna lie" btw

I'm autistic so I appreciate hearing others opinions as I don't always catch all the social nuances. This might actually be more interesting to me than it is to anyone else, lol


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> @MH17
> 
> Ngl is "not gonna lie" btw
> 
> I'm autistic so I appreciate hearing others opinions as I don't always catch all the social nuances. This might actually be more interesting to me than it is to anyone else, lol


I don't understand what it's like to care about how anything is interesting to anybody else. Everybody has a mind that knows words and devices that can produce messages, so it's their own business whether they communicate, or what they communicate. I actually abhor the fucking ant colony hive mind. 'Is this weird? Am I normal? Ngl btw brb asap kgb dvd ups'. I should put this in capitals in my signature actually. Those who care enough to read might heed and not waste my energy with it.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

MH17 said:


> I don't understand what it's like to care about how anything is interesting to anybody else. Everybody has a mind that knows words and devices that can produce messages, so it's their own business whether they communicate, or what they communicate. I actually abhor the fucking ant colony hive mind. 'Is this weird? Am I normal? Ngl btw brb asap kgb dvd ups'. I should put this in capitals in my signature actually. Those who care enough to read might heed and not waste my energy with it.


So why do you bother interacting with anyone?


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

I wasn't intending this to turn into an individual therapy session, but, oh well....


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> So why do you bother interacting with anyone?


Because I work from home office and I get bored when there is little activity. 

Oh, btw, not everybody is a ant plugged into the hive mind.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> I wasn't intending this to turn into an individual therapy session, but, oh well....


If you weren't intending on it and you don't want to say or ask anything, then don't. Why would you?


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

MH17 said:


> Because I work from home office and I get bored when there is little activity. My wife works as well so we can't just talk to each other, virtually never. Either I'm busy, she's busy, or we're both busy.
> 
> Oh, btw, not everybody is a ant plugged into the hive mind.


What is the "hive mind" ?


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

MH17 said:


> If you weren't intending on it and you don't want to say or ask anything, then don't. Why would you?


Because I'm curious. I thought it might be more of a group chat, but it seems like you're the only one interested in talking to me, lol


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## UpClosePersonal (Apr 18, 2014)

Ms. Aligned said:


> Well she just cured me from dating. So there's that.


From what you've been saying you could use a cure  

I hate superficial advice from ex beauty contestants.

If you lead with sex, you get sex. If you have nothing in common, you get sex.
Having something in common is critical. it begins with having the same life experience like divorce, widowhood, single with other similar background experiences.
If you have children then you want to meet someone who has/had children
It's common sense, not rocket science.
Hard to believe anyone would watch that video in the OP and take it even a little bit seriously.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> What is the "hive mind" ?


It's directing one's motivation, cognition and interaction according to what one expects to be approved, endorsed and accepted by the majority(=the hive).

Abbreviations are an example of the hive-mind code-words. Not only are they positively charged(='cool', 'hip', 'lit', or whatever the current fucking buzzword for 'positive' that circulates the hive these days), you also need to be plugged into the hive and accepting of its instructions to know what they mean. They identify the speaker as an agent of the hive('lit') and oust those who don't know or use it('cringe').

I'm sure others will arrive soon. I've identified myself as a hostile element to the hive. I will be swarmed momentarily. I am sorry to say I have put a bunch of ants on ignore, so that will put a dent in the show for you, but there is only so much lying, boring mediocrity I'm capable of digesting.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

@MH17

so you believe that you are the exception to the rule?


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> @MH17
> 
> so you believe that you are the exception to the rule?


Everybody is an exception and an example of some rule. It depends on which rule you are talking about.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

MH17 said:


> Everybody is an exception and an example of some rule. It depends on which rule you are talking about.


I'm talking about what you were just referring too


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## Unerotic (Jan 23, 2021)

I didn't watch all of this. Why does she have to mention that she's a sociopath "I am a diagnosed sociopath" ? That's just negatively connotated and I have the presumption that sociopaths don't necessairly need to be fixed.
Also, she makes it a process, I think a process works but it's not genuine and it's no longer seductive when the other person knows what you are doing.


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## Shodan (Nov 17, 2016)

Kintsugi said:


> but she's very overt, which IMO makes her less dangerous, perhaps?


Not necessarily. There's a lot of naive people out there, and they would likely be dazed and confused by her (rather than distressed).


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Shodan said:


> Not necessarily. There's a lot of naive people out there, and they would likely be dazed and confused by her (rather than distressed).


True, I speak as someone with a fair amount of experience. Most people live in ignorant bliss


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Yeah.....honestly. I'm pretty attracted to her


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## Ms. Aligned (Aug 26, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> Yeah.....honestly. I'm pretty attracted to her


How? I find every single last thing about her repulsive.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Ms. Aligned said:


> How? I find every single last thing about her repulsive.


Hmm. She's interesting. I get bored easily, LOL

Seriously though, I wouldn't actually pursue her. I think my attraction is more based on my curiosity...which frequently gets me into trouble


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## Shodan (Nov 17, 2016)

Kintsugi said:


> Yeah.....honestly. I'm pretty attracted to her


Noooooooooooo

Don't give in to manipulationnnnn


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## Ms. Aligned (Aug 26, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> Hmm. She's interesting. I get bored easily, LOL
> 
> Seriously though, I wouldn't actually pursue her. I think my attraction is more based on my curiosity...which frequently gets me into trouble


Oh see, I agree with MH17 here. Nothing she's saying is new, insightful, or enlightening/mysterious to me at all. She's essentially saying the same exact thing as this:



recycled_lube_oil said:


> http://imgur.com/a/x0KheCv


This is all PUA and like Panda said, narcissistic seduction. Probably the brightest thing about this lady was slapping herself with the sociopath label to increase views and curiosity (not hating the player), but there's no actual substance there.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Shodan said:


> Noooooooooooo
> 
> Don't give in to manipulationnnnn


When you've been love bombed once and overcome it, you become like an addict in recovery.

The temptation, I guess.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

@Ms. Aligned 

I agree with you. But I still feel attraction

Which is interesting, and something for me to explore


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## Shodan (Nov 17, 2016)

Kintsugi said:


> When you've been love bombed once and overcome it, you become like an addict in recovery.


I nip that right in the bud as soon as I see it. Anybody who is interested in me *that* much is either a liar, or crazy, or both 🤷‍♂️


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## Ms. Aligned (Aug 26, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> @Ms. Aligned
> 
> I agree with you. But I still feel attraction
> 
> Which is interesting, and something for me to explore


Yeah, I was thinking that maybe you haven't really overcome it then. Reminds me of when folks recreate or live the same scenarios because they're unhappy with the way things worked out in the original. So they keep doing it over, trying to understand or fix it.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Shodan said:


> I nip that right in the bud as soon as I see it. Anybody who is interested in me *that* much is either a liar, or crazy, or both 🤷‍♂️


So...here's the thing, lol

I was actually diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder nearly a decade a go. Which means that I developed very separate & dissociated ego states. I've been in therapy for many years, and actually I'm not even sure that I still meet the diagnostic criteria for it....but sometimes I am very aware of parts of myself acting independently, such as feeling attraction or strong feels for others (that feels very ego dystonic to me)

This is an example of that


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

This became more personal than I was anticipating


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Can I resume my therapy session with @MH17 instead 🤣


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

She is very beautiful, she is in control, because she is talking about something she knows well. So you are attracted because of her sex appeal and confidence, probably, as a bonus. What is confusing here about why you would be attracted? The only missing part left to explain why is, you are sexually attracted to the female sex. It's the same reason any man would be attracted to her. I can't help but feel it's stigma to admit this. Feel free to gtfoff the cross, I am taking up that spot now. 

I am attracted to her because she is very beautiful, she is in control, because she is talking about something she knows well. Which makes her some ten trillion times better than some 95% of the population. 

And I'll add myself a nice thorn crown to go with it: I like the way she highlights her facial features with makeup.


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## JennyJukes (Jun 29, 2012)

Well I'm sure it works for someone like her, who is a sociopath. But most people arent, and playing these games are emotionally exhausting.

Its.. not natural. I checked out some female dating strategy forums (and got banned for questioning mods, enough said lol) that have similar tactics that she has e.g. being feminine, not giving out sexual favours, not making the first move etc. I can agree that this has a place in the dating sphere, but the motivations for it dont.

I'm not too clued up on sociopathy but if they're anything like narcs, they use strategies to protect themselves from rejection or losing control. And that's sad. And exhausting. You can be you and find someone who likes you. It might be more effective to follow rules and strategies but you'll have to keep up those pretences forever.

I admit I havent fully listened to it- but she talks about seducing someone but at the same time not giving sexual favours. Then talks about getting intimate and then blocking them. How is any of that seduction? You dont get sex, you dont get intimacy and you dont get a relationship - so what's the point other than feeling powerful? There are better ways to feel powerful and good about yourself


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> Can I resume my therapy session with @MH17 instead 🤣


Way ahead of you. ^ Look up.


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## Ms. Aligned (Aug 26, 2021)

JennyJukes said:


> I admit I havent fully listened to it- but she talks about seducing someone but at the same time not giving sexual favours. Then talks about getting intimate and then blocking them. How is any of that seduction? You dont get sex, you dont get intimacy and you dont get a relationship - so what's the point other than feeling powerful? There are better ways to feel powerful and goo


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Ms. Aligned said:


>


Different strokes for different folks. This means what you both call 'better ways to feel powerful and good about yourself' are shit for Mandy, funny to Cindy and indifferent to Mary. She could say the same about your ways of feeling powerful and good about yourself. How can you not understand something so fiercely obvious?


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## Shodan (Nov 17, 2016)

It is about control. These people see others as toys to play with. That's basically all there is to it.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

shameless said:


> Ok I got 2 seconds in and wanted to say something.
> 
> Her eyes look hollow. Like soulless. How are people falling for someone who looks soulless. Ok I will continue to watch.


What I would like to watch is somebody, for the first time in recorded history, define 'soul'.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MH17 said:


> What I would like to watch is somebody, for the first time in recorded history, define 'soul'.


Usually doesn't refer to a literal belief in souls when people say that.

I did wonder if she wears coloured contacts.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

DOGSOUP said:


> Usually doesn't refer to a literal belief in souls when people say that.
> 
> I did wonder if she wears coloured contacts.


I'm not surprised, since it links to nothing. Hence my interest in some definition.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MH17 said:


> I'm not surprised, since it links to nothing. Hence my interest in some definition.








soulless adjective - Definition, pictures, pronunciation and usage notes | Oxford Advanced American Dictionary at OxfordLearnersDictionaries.com


Definition of soulless adjective in Oxford Advanced American Dictionary. Meaning, pronunciation, picture, example sentences, grammar, usage notes, synonyms and more.




www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

DOGSOUP said:


> soulless adjective - Definition, pictures, pronunciation and usage notes | Oxford Advanced American Dictionary at OxfordLearnersDictionaries.com
> 
> 
> Definition of soulless adjective in Oxford Advanced American Dictionary. Meaning, pronunciation, picture, example sentences, grammar, usage notes, synonyms and more.
> ...


"(of things and places) lacking any attractive or interesting qualities that make people feel happy "

= unattractive or uninteresting. This is the kind of shit you deal with when you try to get anywhere with people.


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## secondpassing (Jan 13, 2018)

Red Panda said:


> Also it's interesting that she views her tactics as the best answer to the manosphere psychos, more adversity and destruction, if only they could destroy each other it would be best for the rest of us.


As another user has implied, it won't solve these manosphere psychos' behaviors.

I think equilibrium of aggression in seduction will roughly follow the prisoner's dilemma. (The choice between 'split' or 'steal'.) 

When there are enough people choosing 'steal' it will then no longer be the optimum strategy, but it doesn't go away. Instead of having mostly male abusers, we would get less male abusers' success, and more women choosing to abuse.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MH17 said:


> "(of things and places) lacking any attractive or interesting qualities that make people feel happy "
> 
> = unattractive or uninteresting. This is the kind of shit you deal with when you try to get anywhere with people.


Did you see what it said (of people)?


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

DOGSOUP said:


> Did you see what it said (of people)?


Yes, "(of a person) lacking the ability to feel emotions ". Doesn't apply here because @shameless was speaking about her perception of her, not the actual person in question.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MH17 said:


> Yes, "(of a person) lacking the ability to feel emotions ". Doesn't apply here because @shameless was speaking about her perception of her, not the actual person in question.


It does apply here because that is the way the word is used of people.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

DOGSOUP said:


> It does apply here because that is the way the word is used of people.


Not shameless, nor anybody else, knows what the poster of the video is able to feel or not, so it doesn't apply if one doesn't agree with using wrong definitions that go nowhere, which I don't.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

secondpassing said:


> As another user has implied, it won't solve these manosphere psychos' behaviors.
> 
> I think equilibrium of aggression in seduction will roughly follow the prisoner's dilemma. (The choice between 'split' or 'steal'.)
> 
> When there are enough people choosing 'steal' it will then no longer be the optimum strategy, but it doesn't go away. Instead of having mostly male abusers, we would get less male abusers' success, and more women choosing to abuse.


Men will adapt, and gain advantage, then women will adapt and gain advantage etc. The circus never ends.


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## secondpassing (Jan 13, 2018)

MH17 said:


> Not shameless, nor anybody else, knows what the poster of the video is able to feel or not, so it doesn't apply if one doesn't agree with using wrong definitions that go nowhere, which I don't.


We don't know, but one can guess to a good degree of confidence.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

secondpassing said:


> We don't know, but one can guess to a good degree of confidence.


So long as there is nothing of substance at stake, of course, we can make sweet love to our cognitive biases all we want.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MH17 said:


> Not shameless, nor anybody else, knows what the poster of the video is able to feel or not, so it doesn't apply if one doesn't agree with using wrong definitions that go nowhere, which I don't.


I'm really curious, what are you getting from this?


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## secondpassing (Jan 13, 2018)

MH17 said:


> So long as there is nothing of substance at stake, of course, we can make sweet love to our cognitive biases all we want.


Most people have the ability to recognize dark triad facial features. 

I'd be willing to bet on my "cognitive bias."


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

DOGSOUP said:


> I'm really curious, what are you getting from this?


I am dispelling the idea in my head that people know what they are talking about, for the next time I will feel compelled to try.


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

It was just that

A perception. I never claimed it as a truth. It was an adjective of what I saw. 

I always chuckle when someone challenges me on my words when I am rambling.


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

secondpassing said:


> As another user has implied, it won't solve these manosphere psychos' behaviors.
> 
> I think equilibrium of aggression in seduction will roughly follow the prisoner's dilemma. (The choice between 'split' or 'steal'.)
> 
> When there are enough people choosing 'steal' it will then no longer be the optimum strategy, but it doesn't go away. Instead of having mostly male abusers, we would get less male abusers' success, and more women choosing to abuse.


ofc it can't solve anything, since all they cause is destruction, hence why we call it antisocial pd, it's not conducive to society's health


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

secondpassing said:


> Most people have the ability to recognize dark triad facial features.
> 
> I'd be willing to bet on my "cognitive bias."


Then be sure to put Most People in contact with criminal profilers. They don't know and they're kind of bending double to come up with some kind of a reliable framework to be able to tell.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MH17 said:


> I am dispelling the idea in my head that people know what they are talking about, for the next time I will feel compelled to try.


Next time, might be a good idea to keep it in your head, too.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> I do tend to agree with you on that but I'm not sure that I'd put it that way exactly


Well , the discussion goes on and I have the kettle on. Take your time.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Is this thread as chaotic as me, I wonder


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

MH17 said:


> Well , the discussion goes on and I have the kettle on. Take your time.


It's late here and I'm getting sleepy. 

I should probably elaborte on that more, but currently it's just "fuzz" inside my head that I have yet to put together in some sort of coherent fashion.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> Is this thread as chaotic as me, I wonder


Not from where I'm sitting. Like I said, take your time.


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

MH17 said:


> Not much. Hence what I said in my opinion about the lady from the video. She's everybody. But that wasn't accurate, now I see it. She's better because she's honest and accurate about it.
> 
> People love to be right and they don't care about others who don't serve the validating purpose. This is what you did back there with your snide remark 'hes an exception, remember? Ha-ha. Some good hearted fun at my expense. Who gives a fuck about being fair or accurate. You have a clique on your side so anything goes.


I like ya. Not because of ya tests. Because of the points you try to make. I get what ya are doing. But I do think you are wrong about her motivation. I respect your investigative skills though. . And skill in exposing hypocrisy.

I did not mind the semantics by the way, I was just laughing at what got pulled out of my remark. I understood the point.

Almost sounded Intp, like ya remind me of two other users here.


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

@Kintsugi the quote is a lil messed up

are you religious or spiritual, or believe that everyone is good in some supernatural way? I ask because understanding her and people like her requires understanding their exceptional biology that allows them to be antisocial and avoid emotions in ways others ain't, but if you have such beliefs they might be getting in the way of that.
IDK if the fable was created as a warning against psychopaths specifically but it might include them at the very least.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Red Panda said:


> @Kintsugi the quote is a lil messed up
> 
> are you religious or spiritual, or believe that everyone is good in some supernatural way? I ask because understanding her and people like her requires understanding their exceptional biology that allows them to be antisocial and avoid emotions in ways others ain't, but if you have such beliefs they might be getting in the way of that.
> IDK if the fable was created as a warning against psychopaths specifically but it might include them at the very least.


I'm not religious or particularly spiritual.

My thinking was more about the extent to which we are defined by our biology. For example, our understanding of neuroscience is still fairly primitive. Similarly, the research into the neurobiological impact of chronic early (and prenatal) childhood trauma has only really started to gain traction in the past decade or so. I'm cautious to draw such conclusions when there is still so much we don't know.

That said, I totally appreciate the need to be careful & cautious


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

Kintsugi said:


> I'm not religious or particularly spiritual.
> 
> My thinking was more about the extent to which we are defined by our biology. For example, our understanding of neuroscience is still fairly primitive. Similarly, the research into the neurobiological impact of chronic early (and prenatal) childhood trauma has only really started to gain traction in the past decade or so. I'm cautious to draw such conclusions when there is still so much we don't know.
> 
> That said, I totally appreciate the need to be careful & cautious


What else could we be defined by?
Yea we don't understand all that stuff very well yet, I agree with that. I'm actually kinda confused as to what you're arguing for here.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Red Panda said:


> What else could we be defined by?
> Yea we don't understand all that stuff very well yet, I agree with that. I'm actually kinda confused as to what you're arguing for here.


I'm not sure that I'm arguing for anything. I tend to just ramble out aloud lol 😅

But now I'm wondering if I am actually more spiritual than I thought.... because I do believe in some kind of human potential, which actually might be related to the notion of the "soul". But I would think that in order to understand that it would be absolutely necessary to fully understand the limitations of our biology.

Hmmmm....

I think I need to go to bed 😭


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

shameless said:


> I like ya. Not because of ya tests. Because of the points you try to make. I get what ya are doing. But I do think you are wrong about her motivation. I respect your investigative skills though. . And skill in exposing hypocrisy.
> 
> I did not mind the semantics by the way, I was just laughing at what got pulled out of my remark. I understood the point.
> 
> Almost sounded Intp, like ya remind me of two other users here.


Save for the spot-on on comment about my investigative skill, I'm compelled to double-check you quoted the right person there. What tests? I said her motivation is to feel good, that's true for everybody. I don't think this could ever be contested, save for cases of debilitating insanity.


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## laluna (2 mo ago)

I just want to comment on the many comments asking how anyone can fall in love with soulless eyes.

The only reason they appear soulless is because there is no target when filming.

This is one of the tactics. People that are susceptible to these tactics do not feel seen, sociopaths/psychopaths have the ability to "make space" for another person. They hand their identity to them, the lack of internal conflict in the sociopath gives space for the target's internal conflict. This beginning treatment first tells the target how amazing they are and then takes away the beautiful feeling of success by behaving in a way which the target believes they are failing to continue to be lovable. Then the target tries and tries to become lovable again, repeat cycle. The psychopath is allowing the target to do most of the work after the boredom sets in and they have "won". Its moreover sad that so many feel unloved, lost and in need of kindness. This is why self love is absolutely necessary.

Don't play with fire. Beware.


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## Necrofantasia (Feb 26, 2014)

Hard pass. Fighting fire with fire is not going to do anyone any favors. We've got enough sociopaths serenading the dating minefield. The best way to deal with an undesired behaviour is not rewarding it. Engagement counts as a reward in this context.

The fact someone is using a sociopathy diagnosis as a sort of dating expertise credential is...a sign of interesting times getting more interesting I guess. Girl is probably just making an easy buck by telling regressive types things they wish to hear, just like Jordan Peterson and Blair White do.

IDK if this is considered out of touch or childish, I need to ask.
If the point of dating is to find someone *you* can start a domestic unit with and be intimate with and *live with* with every day isn't a focus on deception and covering up vulnerabilities and projecting a different life run counter to this purpose to the point of completely undermining it? The focus isn't expression or promotion anymore, it's deception and getting things under the radar and hoping the other doesn't notice. It's a predatory psychology arms race basically. The point is being completely missed.

Is being unpaired really that much of a life ender that people need to go this far?


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## thedazzlingdexter (12 mo ago)

Kintsugi said:


> Okay, so this interesting individual recently came to my attention. She claims to be a diagnosed sociopath, and is allegedly the answer to the ever growing online manosphere.
> 
> I don't really have much of an opinion about her at this point or what she says, but I'd LOVE to hear others thoughts....
> 
> ...


It's very simple. You don't need to be a sociopath. Women in general expect harrasement. So don't do that. Stand out by not chasing. Than they chase you.


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## Eren Jaegerbomb (Nov 13, 2015)

@JimT Personally, if someone is wealthy it's a bonus rather than a requirement. Well, for me at least.


MH17 said:


> Wait..love?What?Haven't you been paying attention?I'm a vile monstrosity. As to the question, I've been looking myself. Judging by how them folks have been reacting, I don't have long before they start preparing the stakes.


Well I hope they don't send you to the stocks!


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## Eren Jaegerbomb (Nov 13, 2015)

JimT said:


> I'm hip. I would never marry for money, because I have enough of my own.
> 
> But what can I say. Some women are old-school, and they are all about landing the "high-value" (meaning "rich") men. Study up on FDS if you want to learn more about it. FDS started out innocently enough, kind of an updated version of "The Rules" (a self-help book for women by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider from around 1995). FDS started out as just some ideas for women on how to be purposeful and focused on high-quality mates in the dating world. But it had an active message board on Reddit and increasingly became about hard-core gold-digging. It would refer to men as "scrotes" (short for scrotums) and establish "high value" based on the most superficial of measures. See this article for a starter: Online forum created in reaction to Red Pill Rights teaches women to avoid 'worthless scrotes' | Daily Mail Online


YIKES.😬 Men and women out there doing this to people. Ouch.

I only date for long term prospects. Like if I get a boyfriend and it all goes well then hopefully we could get married y'know? I'm not interested in any of this other shiz.

I'm not really interested in children per se, just a partner.


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## OrchidSugar (5 mo ago)

shameless said:


> I PROMISE you I am not better at it. I am fiercely ethical and protective, in these ways and it took me going through what you just described myself to understand how to fight back. This is probably one of the only things an ETHICAL or MORAL INFP & ESTP even have in common is both will be VERY defensive of fighting an ethical or fighting a moral dilemma . If we are upset we will shake some ground. So I only spoke from learning how to fight water well with fire. I say water cuz they are not fire. they are water they flood lol, we are more so fire. That is what they count on. To put fire out. I stress though I had a very similar experience you described when I was first in longterm healthcare. It was later when I worked in behavioral healthcare amongst all the mental health stuff, and then had lived experience with the clients operations I started to understand it. they are just really good at making ethical or moral people look like the crazies.
> 
> Water does not have to put out the fire. Fire can surround the water until it dries up
> 
> ...


Thanks - that is really sweet of you. I'm still not sure in which direction I'll go, so I can't take you up on any offers. As yet, the references haven't been the thing that's screwed me over the most. Except maybe once. But I'm just not the right fit.. So I actually am starting to think it's me. I'm also tired of the corporate red tape and the nonsense. Like so so so so tired. I don't know if I belong there anymore. This is going to sound crazy, but spiritually I am tapped out. Just a deep deep exhaustion. I'm punching weakly at it, trying to be a normal citizen who contributes to society or whatever the cool kids say. But I'm not making it to the point of needing references in most cases anyway. By the third interview I'm not making it.


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## JimT (May 31, 2010)

Eren Jaegerbomb said:


> YIKES.😬 Men and women out there doing this to people. Ouch.
> 
> I only date for long term prospects. Like if I get a boyfriend and it all goes well then hopefully we could get married y'know? I'm not interested in any of this other shiz.
> 
> I'm not really interested in children per se, just a partner.


I'm not judging the FDS women. When they first showed up on Reddit a couple years ago, I thought it was hilarious. It was fun to see women discussing their petty rip-offs right out in the open. And I liked the term "scrotes." I don't know who thought it up, but it had just the right amount of whimsy and disdain for men. 

Now I don't see FDS around as much. It was taking a lot of heat from the PC crowd at Reddit, so they moved most of the discussion forums off Reddit to a separate website. But they are putting out videos and podcasts, so I guess they are alive and well.

Anyway, I wish them well. Dating has always been a "caveat emptor" ("Buyer beware") deal. Even among people with the most honorable of intentions, you still find a lot of people taking short-cuts or engaging in petty little rip-offs at the expense of their partners. With a divorce rate of 50%, you have to figure that it's not all "happily ever after." It's good to peruse some relationship self-help books and maybe even some PUA/FDS material to arm oneself and learn how to spot the frauds and rip-offs. A little cynicism about the dating market can be a healthy thing. 

Anyway, best of luck in your search for a compatible partner!


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

I'm once again feeling thankful for the fact that I currently have little interest in "mainstream" dating 😅

A lot seems to have changed in this social sphere over the past decade, or perhaps I've just always been somewhat oblivious to it 🤷‍♀️


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## OrchidSugar (5 mo ago)

Kintsugi said:


> I'm once again feeling thankful for the fact that I currently have little interest in "mainstream" dating 😅
> 
> A lot seems to have changed in this social sphere over the past decade, or perhaps I've just always been somewhat oblivious to it 🤷‍♀️


I sometimes think about the past decade or so as well in terms of the dating scene. And one thing I will say with social media and high internet usage is that there seems to be no more separate male /female spaces to have girl talk and guy talk. It has an illusion shattering effect to be confronted with the real unadulterated thoughts and opinions of the opposite sex. It’s like ugh !

Imagine being a little awkward and inexperienced to ask a girl out and you log on the internet to find that girls your age are all fantasizing about a perfectly six foot tall hunk of a man who knows how to dominate them sexually, who takes charge, finances their lifestyle of novel experiences, and has high charisma. You’re nothing like that so you find someone who you perceive to be like that and you try to learn from him.

Or imagine being a young woman looking for genuine love and commitment and you have to log on to the internet to find that your target demographic of guy believes that you have no worth unless you are pretty, between the ages of 18 and 24, and keep your opinions to yourself. Nauseating. Or you stumble upon these pump and dump relationship content advising young men how to psychologically manipulate you into a game of attraction.

I mean I definitely think that things are a lot worse dating wise these days. Just compared to a decade ago


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

@OrchidSugar 

Those are really good points. It reminds me of an academic paper I read that was published around a decade a go. It argued that increased internet (& social media) use was creating a new kind of social & attachment feedback loop that psychologists had barely began to research and understand, and the possible impact this might have on current models used in developmental psychology.


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## OrchidSugar (5 mo ago)

Kintsugi said:


> @OrchidSugar
> 
> Those are really good points. It reminds me of an academic paper I read that was published around a decade a go. It argued that increased internet (& social media) use was creating a new kind of social & attachment feedback loop that psychologists had barely began to research and understand, and the possible impact this might have on current models used in developmental psychology.


Definitely. I fully expect to see a commercial 30 years from now: “Were you or a loved one exposed to the metaverse between the years 2015-2025? You may be entitled to financial compensation.”


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## JimT (May 31, 2010)

I don't know. Life sucked before the internet. Before the internet, if you wanted to learn about love, all that was available were empty sentimental nostrums (for example, "Just be yourself" or "Happy wife, happy life") from Disney movies, Hallmark movies, romantic comedies, stories about Romantic chivalry, etc. Or fake letters to the editor in Playboy magazine about some guy who claimed to have had a threesome with a couple hot college co-eds.

Nowadays with the internet you can get unfiltered personal life experience from people all around the world speaking their minds freely because of anonymity. Some of it can be shocking. And some corners of the internet are populated by freaks and mentally ill people. But those latter corners are usually pretty well-known by everyone, and you go there at your own discretion.

But the bottom line is that I would rather know how life and love _actually_ work as portrayed today on the internet, instead of trying to live according to nonsensical sentimental formulas from the past that didn't reflect real life.

If I had had the internet in my younger years, I could very likely have avoided two very bad marriages and divorces. I blame my own ignorance for those marriages; I was trying to live according to the bullshit sentimental nostrums of Romantic chivalry. Nowadays I know better.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

@JimT

I actually agree with you. The internet has been pretty awesome for me too, for the most part.

But there are also clearly a lot of people struggling as well


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## JimT (May 31, 2010)

Kintsugi said:


> @JimT
> 
> I actually agree with you. The internet has been pretty awesome for me too, for the most part.
> 
> But there are also clearly a lot of people struggling as well


They were struggling in the pre-internet days too. Perhaps even moreso. For example, divorce rates in the U.S. were actually higher in the pre-internet years of the 80s and 90s than they are today. Again: Possibly due to lack of good info about what people really want and need from a relationship?

Link: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news...nd-divorce-in-the-united-states-in-one-chart/


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## Eren Jaegerbomb (Nov 13, 2015)

JimT said:


> I'm not judging the FDS women. When they first showed up on Reddit a couple years ago, I thought it was hilarious. It was fun to see women discussing their petty rip-offs right out in the open. And I liked the term "scrotes." I don't know who thought it up, but it had just the right amount of whimsy and disdain for men.
> 
> Now I don't see FDS around as much. It was taking a lot of heat from the PC crowd at Reddit, so they moved most of the discussion forums off Reddit to a separate website. But they are putting out videos and podcasts, so I guess they are alive and well.
> 
> ...


Well I kinda found (a potential) somebody when I really wasn't looking, or even considering anything with this particular person, but hey now I am. It's always the way. I think forced dating and forcing yourself out there doesn't always work. It's when you least expect it or just happens at random. 😆 Which is why I always hated dating websites, too unnatural.


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## JimT (May 31, 2010)

Eren Jaegerbomb said:


> Well I kinda found (a potential) somebody when I really wasn't looking, or even considering anything with this particular person, but hey now I am. It's always the way. I think forced dating and forcing yourself out there doesn't always work. It's when you least expect it or just happens at random. 😆 Which is why I always hated dating websites, too unnatural.


Sounds good to me! I hope your (potential) somebody works out.  You seem like a good person. Best of luck!


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

JimT said:


> They were struggling in the pre-internet days too. Perhaps even moreso. For example, divorce rates in the U.S. were actually higher in the pre-internet years of the 80s and 90s than they are today. Again: Possibly due to lack of good info about what people really want and need from a relationship?
> 
> Link: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news...nd-divorce-in-the-united-states-in-one-chart/


I agree. Discovering new information & perspectives has been really beneficial for me personally.

But there is something interesting I observed; that some people perhaps feel threatened by these changes & increasing awareness? Maybe it's because they are finding it harder to get laid, lol


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## JimT (May 31, 2010)

Kintsugi said:


> I agree. Discovering new information & perspectives has been really beneficial for me personally.
> 
> But there is something interesting I observed; that some people perhaps feel threatened by these changes & increasing awareness? Maybe it's because they are finding it harder to get laid, lol


Anyone can get laid. The trouble is that they can't get laid by the class of partner that they want or feel entitled to.

Everyone has high expectations of what they want in terms of a partner. But sometimes their expectations are too high. Sometimes you have to lower your expectations and be more realistic about the class of partner you can attract.

It happens to everyone. We all want the prince or princess, but the prince or princess doesn't necessarily want us. So maybe we have to settle for the common peasants.

I mean, if it's just about getting laid, then the solution is pretty much that simple.


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## intranst (Jul 13, 2021)

Idk if they are serious about that PUA stuff or just out for money but the videos I’ve seen on it are always cringe. You can tell these dudes lack genuine confidence.


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## intranst (Jul 13, 2021)

JimT said:


> It happens to everyone. We all want the prince or princess, but the prince or princess doesn't necessarily want us. So maybe we have to settle for the common peasants.


Lol hey don’t underestimate us peasants, we’re pretty open-minded..


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

OP

My delay in response was cuz I got pissed with a recruiters bait and hook method and then decided ah fuck and got day drunk


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## MadMaxSDP (2 mo ago)

Kintsugi said:


> Okay, so this interesting individual recently came to my attention. She claims to be a diagnosed sociopath, and is allegedly the answer to the ever growing online manosphere.
> 
> I don't really have much of an opinion about her at this point or what she says, but I'd LOVE to hear others thoughts....
> 
> ...


I really find the idea that someone can be seduced absurd. This is grifting off of nonsense at its finest.
Can characters in a movie be seduced? Yes but media portrays personalities and psychologies as two dimensional hand puppets.
The word has its uses but don’t fool yourself…the art is seduction is the art of self-deception.


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## Necrofantasia (Feb 26, 2014)

OrchidSugar said:


> Or imagine being a young woman looking for genuine love and commitment and you have to log on to the internet to find that your target demographic of guy believes that you have no worth unless you are pretty, between the ages of 18 and 24, and keep your opinions to yourself. Nauseating. Or you stumble upon these pump and dump relationship content advising young men how to psychologically manipulate you into a game of attraction.
> 
> I mean I definitely think that things are a lot worse dating wise these days. Just compared to a decade ago



Because at the core we're seen as and groomed to act like cattle/ potential trophies that are appraised mainly on looks and everything else is a nuisance if it doesn't help appearances. Basically the focus is on having a relationship and checking the boxes society tells you to check, as opposed to _ being in a relationship ._

Why do so many women actually fear leaving the house without makeup? Because some of us use it as a psychological crutch. A coping mechanism. Like the soldier that is compulsively maintaining his gun in case he needs it. You will never be loved if you're not pretty and patiently take being talked at like you're a car in an auto dealership. Even jobs keep the broken records going. 

Just get a sex doll instead of forcing a person into the role of one.



intranst said:


> Idk if they are serious about that PUA stuff or just out for money but the videos I’ve seen on it are always cringe. You can tell these dudes lack genuine confidence.


The two are not mutually exclusive. They're not paying for therapy for the women who are preyed on with their methods


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## Latetomato (11 mo ago)

Just don’t hang out with fake ass hoes. Simple. There are lots of people, regardless of pronouns or gender ID. People with no and any diagnosis live their lives this way. People show you who and how they are. Be careful and cautious. If you feel the need to rush, don’t. Ask questions, they don’t even have to be the right ones. If someone knows more about you than you know about them, take note.


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## INTJ_Artist (Aug 19, 2021)

Kintsugi said:


> I don't really have much of an opinion about her at this point or what she says, but I'd LOVE to hear others thoughts....


Simple answer: Run.

If she is actually a sociopath, and not just talking out of ignorance, then what's love for you is just a tool for her manipulation. 

I've seen this happen first hand in a couple that were roommates of mine. The woman, who was the sociopath (I'll call her H), progressively isolated another roommate and I when we didn't go along with H's decoration schemes (that H wanted US to pay for). First the other roommate was driven off, and my friend was manipulated into kicking me out of the apartment. My "replacement" got very similar treatment and also ended up leaving in short order because he was no fool either.

Once there was nobody else in my friend's life, H had him right where she wanted him. They moved to a new place, had a baby, and not long after H cheated on him and "upgraded" to a richer fool. H then accused my friend of "abusing" her so that she could get sole custody of the child.

Cue 2 years of court drama. Fortunately my friend had a very good lawyer who told him to log every single interaction with H. Her ongoing hypocrisy was duly logged in detail, and my friend was able to go free instead of doing jail time. He also got shared custody of their child. Though he spent 5+ years paying off the legal bills.

So I'll repeat myself: RUN!


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## intranst (Jul 13, 2021)

^^ I was trying to sad face that but the emojis are weird rn and I’m drunk.


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## thedazzlingdexter (12 mo ago)

I love how there is all these videos and people trying to explain how to pick up women. 

When in reality its very easy to pick up women 

People seem to lack the things that many do find attractive 

Its called Respect and human decency 

You can manipulate people into loving you but you are none the less 
A JERK


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Latetomato said:


> If someone knows more about you than you know about them, take note.


Yep 👍


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## Dezir (Nov 25, 2013)

thedazzlingdexter said:


> I love how there is all these videos and people trying to explain how to pick up women.
> 
> When in reality its very easy to pick up women
> 
> ...


This was a video about how to pick up men...

I have nothing against videos on how to pick up women or videos on how to pick up men. But man, what she describes, it's dark. I won't deny that it works, but it's dark.

The non-ironic textbook definition of manipulation. Scary to see how deep she can go.

But respect and human decency? seriously? I won't deny that it's important. To give the one you love your attention.

But if respect and human decency was all it took white knights would be sinking with women. While the jocks' dating life would be drier than the Texan desert.

But experience tells both of us this is not how it works.

She is a really good sociopath and made a case that she got men by behaving "the nice way" without offering them sex to still have power. Or as she puts it:

She starts with - Lovebomb - give people compliments, attention, affection.
The kind of love that they are looking for - this is the kind of love that they are looking for: giving people compliments, attention, affection.
We make sure, you feel, like you are the most interesting person in the world.

And then when all that attention is done she moves on to phase 2 which is future faking:

The ego boost they got from these false promises kept them so attached to me, it's such a powerful motivator.
Future fracking gets people so invested and attached.

And then she plays the hot and cold game to remind him of the "good time" and gain power, gain control.

Leave the door halfway open and play the hot and cold game.
Nobody else releases that highly positive emotion in them, that surge of dopamine.
They will take any sliver of it. The tiniest amount will make them satisfied. And this is how you get them attached to you. (And lower their value)
They will inherently believe that they are of lower value than you, because you are the one who is in control.
What bargaining chip do you have at this point?

If someone would do this to me, I don't think I will be able to resist, which makes her even more scary to me. You could make the case that her manipulation was an enchanced and cold calucated version of "respect and human decency" but in small dosage.

But male-to-female manipulation doesn't require that much finesse. She's a non-ironically mastermind. But most men manipulating women aren't mastermind most of the time, must of the time they're a brute. And it's all because women love that masculinity. That "strong, dominant, powerful man", who can be in charge of the converastion and always say the right things, looks like a Chad and has the heets from her, would do anything for her.

Women love masculine men and end up suffering because jocks they like are more masculine than the nerds.

Jocks who treat them wrong, nerds who treat them right. Does that mean we should all stop being masculine? no.

This is what women do, you can use that in your advantage or not.

You can use that to protect yourself or not.

Give people attention, be thoughtful with them.

Women love seeing and being with handsome masculine men. But we should also learn to spot bad apples from those masculine men, because not all masculine men are bad, but there are masculine.

There are masculine men who are bad and take advantage of women. Because they like them and they know that. The fuckboys and such.

What I mean to say, her version of female-to-male manipulation was an enchanced and cold calucated version of "respect and human decency", a tactic that already works with men. Women being submissive, being nice, giving you attention, all that good stuff. Until it stops, that's where her plan comes in. But male-to-female manipulation is not going to be some enchanced and cold calucated version of "respect and human decency", because it's not a tactic that already works with women, but rather, an enchanced version of the fuckboy, a tactic that works with women. This is why most male-to-female manipulators are not masterminds like this woman but simply brutes. Where as she was more crafty and had to be a sociopath to go all this way and be successful. A male-to-female manipulation just has to be a strong brute, but I also acknowledge that male-to-female manipulators sociopaths do exist.

Point is, I wonder what would a male sociopath say about male-to-female manipulation? what would his tactics be different from this woman if any at all? my guess is that they would be very different because men and women respond to different things.

She already used the things that men do find attractive to get with the men she wants. The idea was there, she just extrapolated it. I don't think her male counterpart would use what you describe as many do find attractive "respect and human decency", to do exactly what she does but opposite-gender. Because it doesn't work that way. . Attraction is more sensual.

Couldn't find a male counterpart interview to that. But I found her video talking about attraction to sociopath.




She argues that one of the biggest selling point is their charm.

There is also high-functioning vs low-functioning:


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

@Dezir 

Real talk - are you Autistic?


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## MadMaxSDP (2 mo ago)

Alright ladies…best way to seduce a man is to give him a quick flash of a whale thong while bending over or short skirt and undies while crossing your legs. There’s no easier way to occupy his mind for years to come…no pun intended. If you do it a few times he’ll even ask to marry you.

want to test his loyalty? Do it once or twice in private and if he bites you got yourself a cheating bastard.

all This other stuff in the video is pointless. I just gave you the key - aka god mode.

if the above doesn’t work then the man cannot be seduced. Wait a while and try again - everyone goes through different seasons.


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## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Literally had to Google what "whale thong" meant


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