# I'm an ESFP. Some of yours complete opposite. AMA



## Kazoo The Kid (May 26, 2013)

Lets do this. You think I can't throw around big words like the big boys? Lets go.


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## braided pain (Jul 6, 2012)

Why are you so antagonistic? Did an NT kick your dog?


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## Ryo (Nov 12, 2011)

braided pain said:


> Why are you so antagonistic? Did an NT kick your dog?


More likely ate his/her children. At least that's propably what they think NTs do.


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## Kazoo The Kid (May 26, 2013)

braided pain said:


> Why are you so antagonistic? Did an NT kick your dog?


Lol, it was a joke. I'm sorry if that offended you.

I think that conclusion said more about your negative pre-conception than it does about my sentence to be honest.


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## LordFredong (Jul 2, 2013)

/thread


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## -Alpha- (Dec 30, 2013)

Fight fight fight fight!!!!

Sent from my Orbital Death Laser using Tapatalk.


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## I Kant (Jan 19, 2013)

Kazoo said:


> Lets do this. You think I can't throw around big words like the big boys? Lets go.


Let's _transmigrate_.

Your turn.


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## Kazoo The Kid (May 26, 2013)

What's up with all the negativity? (I made this thread so people could realize not all ESFPs are complete dumbasses but it seems you can't even get the idea out of your head long enough to ask a simple qeustion)

I mean at least try to take it a little bit seriously.


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## CorrosiveThoughts (Dec 2, 2013)

You can't expect to be taken seriously if you base your posts on generalizations and presume to think for all NTs.


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## Ryo (Nov 12, 2011)

Why do you think any of the responses you got were seriously negative?


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## Vermillion (Jan 22, 2012)

Hey, I wanna join this AMA. I'm ESFP too. Come on NTs, give us all you've got! I bet you guys have always wondered what's the secret to being as dazzling as we are B)


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## Ryo (Nov 12, 2011)

Amaterasu said:


> Hey, I wanna join this AMA. I'm ESFP too. Come on NTs, give us all you've got! I bet you guys have always wondered what's the secret to being as dazzling as we are B)


Uh... what's the secret to being as... dazzling as you are? (This has got to be good)


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## -Alpha- (Dec 30, 2013)

I think the NTs might be misinterpreting this to be more mocking than it's actually intended. Pretty sure they're just having fun.

Sent from my Orbital Death Laser using Tapatalk.


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## Kazoo The Kid (May 26, 2013)

CorrosiveThoughts said:


> You can't expect to be taken seriously if you base your posts on generalizations and presume to think for all NTs.


??When did I do any of that? I think your reading too deep.



Ryo said:


> Uh... what's the secret to being as... dazzling as you are? (This has got to be good)


Vodka with lucky charms. Every morning.


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## Kazoo The Kid (May 26, 2013)

Darth Alpha said:


> I think the NTs might be misinterpreting this to be more mocking than it's actually intended. Pretty sure they're just having fun.
> 
> Sent from my Orbital Death Laser using Tapatalk.


Well I am mocking you. But I also kinda want it to be a tiny bit productive. I don't see why we can't mock each other and still have a converstation worth having.

But if you just wanna mock each other I can do that too.


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## -Alpha- (Dec 30, 2013)

Kazoo said:


> Well I am mocking you. But I also kinda want it to be a tiny bit productive. I don't see why we can't mock each other and still have a converstation worth having.
> 
> But if you just wanna mock each other I can do that too.


Naw, I'm fine. So how is it having Se as your dominant function? When I talk to people I have to mentally prepare for it, much in the same way one might breathe deep before they swim underwater. How does the process work for you? Do you even do that?

Also, how does your inferior Ni manifest for you?

Sent from my Orbital Death Ray using Tapatalk.


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## Kazoo The Kid (May 26, 2013)

Darth Alpha said:


> Naw, I'm fine. So how is it having Se as your dominant function? When I talk to people I have to mentally prepare for it, much in the same way one might breathe deep before they swim underwater. How does the process work for you? Do you even do that?
> 
> Also, how does your inferior Ni manifest for you?
> 
> Sent from my Orbital Death Ray using Tapatalk.


Se is just more of a natural state of mind. Its like the opposite of absent mindedness. Even though I'm not really "thinking" in words my mind is taking in information about everything around me. So if I'm walking in the afternoon I will pay attention to the various different ways "laundromat" is spelled and how the bus system has at least 5 different types of buses. Some have a thread for a stop signal while others have a pieace of tape to request a stop while others have a stop button and ect. I pretty much just know a lot of useless information about the things I see everyday that I don't think an N would pay attention too.(however I do live in the city so I'm not really sure about how people process more natural enviorments)

As far as communication is concerned talking to people is extremely easy to me. I think of it as sizing up your audience. Different people and social groups have different interest and laugh at different things. Some even prefer different greetings. Like the city is very multi cultural so depending on the person I will say "hello" or "yo" or "wassup" or "hola" if I know the person is a native spanish speaker. Because different introductions will change peoples opinion about the type of person you are and if they are interesting in talking to you. And I like talking.

So once you get into a converstation with somebody you just kinda figure out what interest them and you just let it all go from there. I talk a lot. However most people don't say anything about the fact I talk so much because what I say interest them. If somebody said "you talk too much" it means your not entertaining them. People are pretty much just a second nature.

I'm not really sure how Ni manifest in a lot of ESFPs. I'm abnormal in the sense Ni and Te are both very well developed consindering how young I am. I'm very often mistaken for an NTJ because of how well organized and callous I can be when the situation calls for it.

However both Ni and Te are both more fallback functions. When being my natural disorganized rather superficial self fails to solve a problem and/or hinders me Ni and The come to help sort out a situation. I see Ni as kinda an extension of Se. Se is about processing what's there and Ni is about seeing what isn't there. So if you don't see what's there first how can you go deeper? I see it as taking what the senses give you and building on that. Se sees the present. Ni builds off it and branches into the most likely future and/or what those senses mean on a more symbolic level.

(this is my view about they work for me. I by no mean am trying to "explain" the functions and how they work for all)


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## braided pain (Jul 6, 2012)

Kazoo said:


> Lol, it was a joke. I'm sorry if that offended you.
> 
> I think that conclusion said more about your negative pre-conception than it does about my sentence to be honest.


No, not offended. That was dry sarcasm.

You did say to ask you anything, after all.


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## kokomarro (Jan 16, 2014)

I've met a couple of ESFPs and they're all extremely non-confrontational; it's quite aggravating trying to get them engaged in a debate without them either trying to change the subject or get offended, even though no offense was intended. Have you found many ESFPs, either yourself or others, that behave in such a way towards confrontation/ debate? Also, what is it like to have a secondary function of introverted feeling? That's almost foreign to me in all seriousness.


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## zazara (Nov 28, 2013)

ISFP here, but I felt like popping in so hi. 



kokomarro said:


> I've met a couple of ESFPs and they're all extremely non-confrontational; it's quite aggravating trying to get them engaged in a debate without them either trying to change the subject or get offended, even though no offense was intended. Have you found many ESFPs, either yourself or others, that behave in such a way towards confrontation/ debate? Also, what is it like to have a secondary function of introverted feeling? That's almost foreign to me in all seriousness.


( I am usually non-confrontational when it comes to debates unless it's regarding something I actually care about.. not that it matters much since I'm not an ESFP. ) 

Can't speak about secondary Fi, but I can about _dominant_ Fi.


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## Razef (Nov 24, 2013)

ladyofshalott said:


> I'm wondering if it depends a lot on the ESFP, maybe they vary a lot? I can imagine that I might not really connect with a lot of people of this type, but with this friend I really do, and like I said it kinda works because of some of their ESFP attributes - opposite-ish friendships/relationships can probably go either way, their weaknesses are my strengths and vice versa (though obvioulsy ESFP is not complete opposite), it depends on whether you can related to and understand each other and this friend I can do that with so it's great!
> 
> People should give ESFPs a chance, they can be super fun!


I have 3 ESFPs in my class, 1 of I get along with, the other 2 are so annoying that I would be able to shoot them if there weren't any laws against that.

Although my best friend is also an ESFP, even though he doesn't always get me he tries to and does his best to help me. He can take criticism, but not too much of it though. It's funny when he does his best to ''get'' my complicated thoughts but most of the time fails, all that matters to me is that he tries and that he's actually interested in them but has problems understanding them.

And he tries to get me out of my shell and meet new people, and he knows I hate it, and I know he does it for my own good. (and the most annoying thing is that he keeps telling me I new a girlfriend).


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## Valtire (Jan 1, 2014)

Tzara said:


> I love how most INTPs hate ESFPs :kitteh:


Socionics. They're conflict partners.

INTJs tend to get along exceedingly well with any close ESFP friends because they have duality.

If an INTP gets close, the conflict starts to appear.


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## Tzara (Dec 21, 2013)

Fried Eggz said:


> Socionics. They're conflict partners.
> 
> INTJs tend to get along exceedingly well with any close ESFP friends because they have duality.
> 
> If an INTP gets close, the conflict starts to appear.


Isnt socionics that thing where you reverse the last letter and act as if something new happened? 
I cant blame socionics for that really, thats how steve jobs did it as well.
:kitteh:
joking aside, I really dont know anything about socionics.


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## Valtire (Jan 1, 2014)

Tzara said:


> Isnt socionics that thing where you reverse the last letter and act as if something new happened?
> I cant blame socionics for that really, thats how steve jobs did it as well.
> :kitteh:
> joking aside, I really dont know anything about socionics.


Lol no. They change the last letter of introverts because they base judging/perceiving on dominant functions.

I.E. INTJs are Ni (perceiving) dominants, so they're INTp (ILI) in socionics.

IMO, Socionics is just a more thorough form of MBTI, but with a negativist attitude. If they weren't so negative, people would probably like them more. It's full of very useful information though. They thoroughly argue why someone is a suitable/not suitable partner, and how your interactions with other people will typically work out.


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## Tzara (Dec 21, 2013)

Fried Eggz said:


> Socionics is just a more thorough form of MBTI, but with a negativist attitude. They thoroughly argue why someone is a suitable/not suitable partner, and how your interactions with other people will typically work out.


Thats the first time I ever heard something interesting about Socionics, Ill go check it out.. umm.. later..


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## Valtire (Jan 1, 2014)

Tzara said:


> Thats the first time I ever heard something interesting about Socionics, Ill go check it out.. umm.. later..


Here's a chart, in case you do look it up later.
Socionics :: Intertype Relations

You can google stuff like "socionics conflict" or "socionics kindred" for more info. Also, for identifying types, it works like this:

EII = ethical intuitive introvert. Fi-Ne
EIE = ethical intuitive extrovert. Fe-Ni
SLI = sensing logical introvert. Si-Te
LSI = logical sensing introvert. Ti-Se


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## stentorious_paroxysm (Apr 25, 2012)

Kazoo said:


> Lets do this. You think I can't throw around big words like the big boys? Lets go.


One could simply recite a dictionary to throw words like the big boys and play at their level. I would be more impressed if you could date an ENTP. This requires extreme patience, trust and acceptance to the fact that you will not understand what your mate is doing until the task is completed.

You will randomly want to go riding off into the sunset and then hike up the highest mountain. Your ENTP mate will randomly want to steal a customer's box of purchased tampons and stash it in your bag during checkout while no one is watching. You will want to eat the same General Tso's Chinese take out and your ENTP mate will want to go into a hole-in-the-wall Indian restaurant that smells weird to get some mango curry chicken. You will want to watch The Expendables, but your ENTP mate will want to watch Inception. You will want to spend your money on a brand new mountain bike. Your ENTP mate will want to spend your money on a lab station to convert a gasoline engine into one that uses dry ice. You will tell your ENTP mate to get a job and a degree because that's what people do. Your ENTP mate will tell you piss off and then make a month's wages in four days. You will tell your ENTP mate to get to an event on time because it is disrespectful to the host to arrive late. Your ENTP mate will deliberately arrive late and then eat all the food and drink all the beer because it was available.

This is why it did not work out with my ESFP girlfriend.


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## Glenda Gnome Starr (May 12, 2011)

I had an intp for a dad. We didn't always get along but we loved each other very much. I miss him so much.
So I really like the intp personality type. I like to listen to their ideas and I like to try to understand how their minds work. Because it is so different from mine, it is fascinating. intp and esfp are different but can get along. It's sort of like soprano and bass. We sing different notes and the timbre of our voices is different. But we harmonize. And it sounds good.



ladyofshalott said:


> I'm wondering if it depends a lot on the ESFP, maybe they vary a lot? I can imagine that I might not really connect with a lot of people of this type, but with this friend I really do, and like I said it kinda works because of some of their ESFP attributes - opposite-ish friendships/relationships can probably go either way, their weaknesses are my strengths and vice versa (though obvioulsy ESFP is not complete opposite), it depends on whether you can related to and understand each other and this friend I can do that with so it's great!
> 
> People should give ESFPs a chance, they can be super fun!


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## Hidden from Sight (Jan 3, 2014)

ladyofshalott said:


> I'm wondering if it depends a lot on the ESFP, maybe they vary a lot? I can imagine that I might not really connect with a lot of people of this type, but with this friend I really do, and like I said it kinda works because of some of their ESFP attributes - opposite-ish friendships/relationships can probably go either way, their weaknesses are my strengths and vice versa (though obvioulsy ESFP is not complete opposite), it depends on whether you can related to and understand each other and this friend I can do that with so it's great!
> 
> People should give ESFPs a chance, they can be super fun!


The pivot point is their auxiliary Fi (which happens to be the INTP's inferior shadow function). Nearly every single ESFP I've have had the bad fortune of crossing (which is a lot) have communicated to me in some cryptic language of twisted Fi judgement that I just cannot stand. Although ISFPs are worse in the regard of Fi, they tend to be rarer than ESFPs, making them the lesser of my worries.


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## Fern (Sep 2, 2012)

Kazoo said:


> ??When did I do any of that? I think your reading too deep.


Story of our lives, ESFP :wink: Story. Of. Our. Gosh dern. Lives.


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## Du Toit (Mar 2, 2014)

Total noob at typing but I noticed your S (taking things at face value) and your F (getting trapped in what you started out) straight away.

Anyways, what's there about sarcasm that some of you guys seem not to get ?


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## ladyofshalott (Feb 8, 2014)

Razef said:


> tries to get me out of my shell and meet new people, and he knows I hate it, and I know he does it for my own good. (and the most annoying thing is that he keeps telling me I new a girlfriend).


Yeah see if an ESFP takes the time to get to be your friend then they will do stuff like this, which probably is for our own good haha!

I think my friend is often intrigued by some of my odd ways, I feel like they understand me _enough _for there to be no problems there.

I think that I could potentially really not connect with or not like a LOT of ESFPs but it's _possible_ to get along super well!


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## Vermillion (Jan 22, 2012)

Elistra said:


> I can't believe no one's asked this yet....
> 
> Is it true that ESFPs will shag anyone?
> 
> :laughing:


Just for asking that question, you're not gonna get a shag. Sorry, bye.



Tzara said:


> I love how most INTPs hate ESFPs :kitteh:
> 
> Personally, I love ESFPs, you guys are my favorite sensors. Well, maybe ISTPs too.


Yeah well, most ESFPs hate INTPs too lol. ESFP-INTP is called Relations of Conflict in Socionics. Worth checking out, because cognitively, both types piss each other off. INTP is Ti base/dominant and Se vulnerable. ESFP is Se base/dominant and Ti vulnerable. Both types communicate to each other with information that the other type finds annoying or is insecure with. That leads to, yes, conflict.

Some of you are cute though. _Some_. :wink:



Napp said:


> Anyways, what's there about sarcasm that some of you guys seem not to get ?


Are you kidding me lol? It's the other way round often; people don't get _my_ sarcasm. I think ESFPs are perfectly capable of being good at sarcasm because a) they have the bite and aggression of Se and b) they have the veiled, backwards emotional communication of Fi. When Fi jokes it can often convey its feelings by saying the exact opposite, like "I hate you" for "I love you", or "You're pathetic" for "I appreciate that". Whereas Fe types in any capacity, be it dominant or inferior or anything in between, may engage in biting sarcasm too but prefer being overt and honest when it comes to actual conveyance of feelings. Because being overt and honest is what recognizes the overhanging bond as opposed to how Fi tries to allude to its own personal connection to the other individual.

Don't get me wrong, anyone can be honest and anyone can be sarcastic, but if we're going to judge types that will statistically have better chances at sarcasm, ESFP will definitely feature on the list. 

Read up on the gamma quadra in Socionics. Sarcasm is pretty much the mothertongue of the gammas, and yes, ESFP is a gamma type.



monemi said:


> Looks similar but different to me. I live in the city, but my attention definitely goes to different things. I'm sizing people up, noticing gaits (in turned knees = fallen arches = balance deficit), facial expressions/body language/threats, aware of who and what is around me, in a tight group paying attention to hands (dude he just picked you wallet). I notice details but I think they're very relevant. I noticed when we were walking down a back street on a narrow sidewalk approaching an alley off to the side that there was a guy walking towards us with his face obscured. I directed my husband to cross the street with me immediately. Why? If I was going to mug someone, I'd take advantage of that set up with a friend down that alley waiting. If victims scream, the sound will bounce off the walls and it will be difficult for anyone to come to their aid. And the disturbing part was there was someone in that alley. I'm not going to be victimized.


Ooh I do stuff like this too, all the time. It actually surprises me that people don't? I don't enjoy socializing for the sake of it because I often find it vapid and get tired out, but every now and then I can make an observant remark that people may find funny or interesting. They like to call it "smart". I don't know, I probably found it a pretty normal thing to say, but I smile at the compliment anyway because which Se dom doesn't like to drink in the praise? 

Anyway, ever since I was a kid I've naturally noticed and connected things pretty fast and hence gotten many "smart" remarks. I'm not infallible though, I can be a spacey klutz at times too


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## Du Toit (Mar 2, 2014)

Amaterasu said:


> Are you kidding me lol? It's the other way round often; people don't get _my_ sarcasm. I think ESFPs are perfectly capable of being good at sarcasm because a) they have the bite and aggression of Se and b) they have the veiled, backwards emotional communication of Fi. When Fi jokes it can often convey its feelings by saying the exact opposite, like "I hate you" for "I love you", or "You're pathetic" for "I appreciate that". Whereas Fe types in any capacity, be it dominant or inferior or anything in between, may engage in biting sarcasm too but prefer being overt and honest when it comes to actual conveyance of feelings. Because being overt and honest is what recognizes the overhanging bond as opposed to how Fi tries to allude to its own personal connection to the other individual.
> 
> Don't get me wrong, anyone can be honest and anyone can be sarcastic, but if we're going to judge types that will statistically have better chances at sarcasm, ESFP will definitely feature on the list.
> 
> Read up on the gamma quadra in Socionics. Sarcasm is pretty much the mothertongue of the gammas, and yes, ESFP is a gamma type.


Sounds plausible, guess i've just messed with the wrong esfp's :wink:. Also, thanks for the details you gave on Fe and Fi. I can now see why my mom hates me being sarcastic or 'opposite' in my sayings so much., as well as other Fe peeps seem to never get it when i'm joking.


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## MysticSnowman (Mar 31, 2014)

Amaterasu said:


> Just for asking that question, you're not gonna get a shag. Sorry, bye.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I do not seek your admiration.


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