# 20 Reasons You're Still Single Men



## Marino

There’s nothing wrong with being single, but at some point most people reach the point of wanting a relationship. If you reached that point a while back, but still haven’t had any luck, you might want to check this list to see if anything sounds familiar.

*You’re Shallow*










Source
If within a few seconds of meeting a woman you have already calculated an estimate of her weight and located any problem areas where cellulite might lurk on her body, you may hereby consider yourself *shallow*. No matter how hot she is, you’re inevitably going to find her flaws. You will likely remain single until you _get over yourself_.

*You’re Too Independent*










Source
Being a bachelor certainly has plenty of perks. You don’t have to wait that extra hour for her to get ready for an outing, and you generally come and go as you please. The thing is, at some point you may actually no longer want to be all alone, and you’re going to have to compromise. Give up a bit of your independence to avoid growing into a lonely old man.

*You’re Afraid of Commitment*










Source
Tying into your fierce sense of independence is your equally strong fear of commitment. On top of losing your freedom, you don’t want to get married, only to get divorced later and lose half of your stuff. The future is unpredictable, and you can bet that once you settle down, you’ll meet a woman who is hotter, smarter and more successful than the one you’re with. Oh, and she’s going to flirt with you, but too bad – you’re in a committed relationship. Knowing this, you have every right to fear commitment, but getting over that fear *is what men do*.

*You’re a Slob*










Source
You need a shave and a haircut. Your dirty laundry is more like a mildew-laced pile of odorous rags, so you wear your t-shirt inside out. There is leftover food on your desk from last week. What’s not to love? Look around, then look at yourself in the mirror. Are you a slob? _Chicks don’t really dig slobs_.

*You’re a Douchebag*










Source
Get your collar popped and layer on that spray-tan – let’s talk about why you’re still single. Could you be a douchebag? Some women actually like douchebags, but these ladies are generally not the type you’d take home to meet mom. If you want to meet a nice girl, you’re going to have to tone it down a notch. Or several.

*You’re Addicted to Gaming*










Source
If by some divine intervention, you actually manage to acquire a _girlfriend_ between day-long bouts of questing, you’re probably in for a let-down since she won’t be around long. You need to cut back, drastically, on your playing habits if you want to maintain a relationship. Just remember, your guild isn’t going to keep you warm at night.

*You’re Desperate*










Source
Desperation reeks. It’s a fact. Men who are desperate repel women. If you are initially cool enough to get a woman’s phone number, by no means should you ever call her more than twice without her returning your call. She may be busy when you call, but if you call repeatedly, you are ensuring that she will never call you back, and even worse, she’ll hope to never see you again.

*You’re the Nice Guy*










Source
You’re always helpful, polite, and kind – the type of guy every woman wants, right? Apparently not. Guys that are _too nice_ have a more difficult time moving out of the friend zone than guys who act like _complete dicks_. Some women even perceive excessive niceness as a weakness of character. You shouldn’t go full douchebag, but don’t be afraid to be a little hard, at times. It just lets her know you’re not a doormat.

*You’re a Control Freak*










Source
It’s your way, or the highway. There’s no room for compromise in your life. You like things the way you like them, and as long as everything goes according to your plan everything is cool. If you throw a temper tantrum the moment something is out of your control, you may need to lighten up a little.

*You’re Too Shy*










Source

There comes a time in your life when you have to either man up and deal with your insecurities or face the fact that you’re going to die alone. If you don’t have any confidence when approaching women, enlist some friends to help you out. You may need to serve as a wingman for a while, but pay attention to what the pilot is doing. Observe him and learn how the game is played. And remember this: *Alcohol is your friend*.

*You’re Selfish*










Source
Did you fail “Sharing” in kindergarten? If you only ever think of yourself, get used to it because you’re the only person you’ll have to consider as you’ll be single for a while. If you can bring yourself to be a little less self-absorbed and a little more considerate, you may have a shot at a relationship. Try putting others before yourself a little more often.

*You’re Broke*










Source
If you’re broke all the time, how can you expect to maintain a relationship? You don’t have to buy a girl expensive gifts, but she will like to go out from time to time. If you’re tired of being single, you’ll have to work some dating funds into your budget.

*Your Friends Are Assholes*










Source
It’s true, you’re judged by the company you keep. If you hang out with jerks, you’re likely a jerk too. Even if you’re not, you can’t stop your friends from acting like assholes and ruining any relationship you might have. Get some better friends.

*You’re In Love With Yourself*


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Sensitive content, not recommended for those under 18
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Source
You’re wonderful and perfect. You don’t need a relationship because everything you do, say and have is so delightful there is really no void to fill. It must be great to be you.

*You’re a Workaholic*










Source
Being career and goal-oriented isn’t a flaw, but it may take away relationship opportunities. If you’re too busy to have any kind of social life outside of work, you’re already married – _to your job_.

*You’re a Pervert*


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Sensitive content, not recommended for those under 18
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Source
We all think about sex – a lot. However, if you fail to disengage your eyes and mouth from your perverted thoughts you will repulse women. If you are looking for a relationship, you will need to learn this skill. It’s also a good idea to learn how to clear your cache and browser history.

*You’re In Love With Your Ex*










Source
Your relationships may never work out if you’re still hung up on the one that got away. It’s best to move forward and let it go, especially if you’re looking for something new. No woman wants to live in the shadow of your ex. It’s also pathetic, so get over it.

*You’re Boring*










Source
What were you saying? Sorry, I fell asleep. You’re boring. Nobody wants to listen to you tell the same unfunny stories over and over. We’re sure your cat is awesome, but come on. Be interesting if you’re going to talk so much, otherwise just shut up and work the mysterious angle instead.

*You’re Obnoxious*










Source
You always interrupt when people are speaking, usually to interject a random rude comment. You’re loud and you’re the only person who thinks you’re funny. You’re like nails on a chalkboard to most women, so _grow up_ and try listening to people for once.

*You’re a Liar*










Source
Telling her that her ass doesn’t look big in those jeans isn’t a lie, it’s self-preservation. Telling her you were at church while you were at the racetrack is a lie. You only have to get caught in one big one to spoil something that could have been nice. Have the balls to tell the truth, _just don’t be brutal about it_.


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## Mikbert

lol, I don't qualify for any of those, I guess you should add *You're a typ 5 sp/so/sx INTJ.


*EDIT: btw, world of warcraft is actually a really good game


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## firedell

Mikbert said:


> EDIT: btw, world of warcraft is actually a really good game


NEERD.
I watched my friend play that game, and I laughed at the seriousness of his game playing.


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## Mikbert

inebriato said:


> NEERD.
> I watched my friend play that game, and I laughed at the seriousness of his game playing.



Hey, WoW is serious buisness!!


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## firedell

Mikbert said:


> Hey, WoW is serious buisness!!


Hahahaha, cute. ;p


----------



## Perseus

*She was drifting like a Satellite*

Is there one showing why women are single?

Daily Dose of Lesbian:

40 Reasons You Are Still Single | Defenceless Queerling- Your Daily Dose of Lesbian..

31. You have glow-in-the-dark stars above your bed

She was drifting like a Satellite


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## Verdant Hollow

Nice list for guys. You make this yourself? If not, source? :happy:

Mikbert, WoW is a good MMO (even if I despise the game), that's not what Marino is saying :tongue:


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## Mikbert

inebriato said:


> Hahahaha, cute. ;p


:wink:


tdmg said:


> Nice list for guys. You make this yourself? If not, source? :happy:
> 
> Mikbert, WoW is a good MMO (even if I despise the game), that's not what Marino is saying :tongue:


I know, I just saw the WoW image and thought I'd inject a little off-topic into my post ;D


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## OrangeAppled

Perseus said:


> Is there one showing why women are single?


Most of these apply to women also, or you can find a stereotypical female equivalent. The general message, albeit delivered a bit roughly, is to be a balanced person. What's funny is, for each of these extremes, you could tag it with MBTI types that stereotypically fit the caricature (ie. the too independent surfer guy could be ISTP).


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## shygirl

I have the tendency to be a slob, but I do clean up at the end of the day. When I'm with another slob I quit caring. When I'm with myself I, yeah, try to keep things clean because I prefer things clean. I have to do a 15 - 20 minute cleaning at the end of the day.

I CAN be a gamer. I am a recovering WoW addict. How DARE you show me that picture! Man, I really want to play. I can't, I can't. I have too much going on in my life right now.

I'm the nice girl. I not only get stepped on, but I pretty much ask to be stepped on. Then I end up getting mad that someone has walked all over me when I know that I'm the one who has let it happen in the first place.

I am really shy.

And broke.


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## slowriot

Marino said:


> *You’re Shallow*


No, only a little but its so little its not why.



> *You’re Too Independent*


Nope



> *You’re Afraid of Commitment*


Nope




> *You’re a Slob*


Yes




> *You’re a Douchebag*


Nope




> *You’re Addicted to Gaming*


Nope




> *You’re Desperate*


Hmmm, dont think I am




> *You’re the Nice Guy*


Guilty as charged





> *You’re a Control Freak*


hahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahha! No




> *You’re Too Shy*


Yes




> *You’re Selfish*


Not really only whats normal but no Im a giving person I think




> *You’re Broke*


Yes I am




> *Your Friends Are Assholes*


Will ask their viwes and SO's but I dont think so.




> *You’re In Love With Yourself*


NO!




> *You’re a Workaholic*


hahahahahahahhahahahhhhahahahahahaha! No



> *You’re a Pervert*


I know Ive been called that today, but it was guys, so I dont think I am.




> *You’re In Love With Your Ex*


No shes married so no reason to love her anymore.



> *You’re Boring*


Some might think I am but I think Im pretty hilarious, I laugh at a lot of my own jokes, so....



> *You’re Obnoxious*


I hope not, never been told that.




> *You’re a Liar*


I will never lie to a woman and I am a very honest guy.

Now you do the math


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## Mutatio NOmenis

I'm nice, although I've found that occaisinally dropping the hammer does a good job of showing people that I'm not weak. It scares people because I'm typically nice and quiet, although a bit grumpy. Girls seem to be somewhat more intersted in me when I'm wearing my ENTJ hat.


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## The Proof

21. You're a neat freak and think of sex as dirty

22. You've been sexually abused and lost all confidence in the opposite sex

23. You've had a hard time growing up with a deranged family and you're afraid of other people's insanity

^all valid points :dry:


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## Perseus

24. You are subject of political action called "achieving social defeat" and excess to mates is forbidden under threat of torture (Police State UK) psychological abuse by the Social Services, intimidation by gangsters etc. 

25. You have been corrupted by swishers and ********* (you might have gone to a "Cold Shower" Public School or been in the Army, Navy or Hell's Angels).


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## Perseus

Meet the man so shy he's never even kissed a woman

Meet the man so shy he's never even kissed a woman (From The Argus)

Comment: it is a fact that if you really like someone, you become tongue-tied, well NPs do. 

or

Maybe his Mum is "Puff the Magic Dragon" or he has got a mystery "shy" psychological stalker. Or in a Fraudian Society he is a Multi-spirited one. 

or he is a PNIT and the Guards think he is Satan and the daughters are all Dryads.


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## Perseus

inebriato said:


> NEERD.
> I watched my friend play that game, and I laughed at the seriousness of his game playing.



Type these:

You are obsessed with insignificant details
You don't consider your partner's feelings
You are irresponsible
You are a bully and control freak
You have to do it exactly right
You will not stand up for yourself
You will will not take dating seriously
You have not got an ounce of patience
You need everything to be absolutely perfect
You jump in before you are ready to finish what you have started
Your eyes wander off and catch the eye of another
You really must help me out with this
You like to listen to your partner who is always wrong
You will have to do things your way (independent)
You will insist on making up your own rules and disregarding the conventional way
You will rush around and do not give me a chance to relax


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## Deagalman

I have a lot to work on


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## Deagalman

Thracius said:


> 21. You're a neat freak and think of sex as dirty
> 
> 22. You've been sexually abused and lost all confidence in the opposite sex
> 
> 23. You've had a hard time growing up with a deranged family and you're afraid of other people's insanity
> 
> ^all valid points :dry:



Maybe for you mane! :shocked:


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## The Proof

Deagalman said:


> Maybe for you mane! :shocked:


26. You're narrow minded and afraid of being tested


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## Deagalman

Thracius said:


> 26. You're narrow minded and afraid of being tested


 
No, I was just never molested as a child. I wonder what is worse being "narrow minded" or a better word for this would be strongly opinionated and therefore intimidating. Or thinking one is gifted with women, even though they aren't, and have nothing to back it up with. Ahhhhhh hemmmmmmmmmmm


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## snail

For real. If it weren't for the ability to find each other online, I think the only way for introverts to meet would be by making extraverted friends who could introduce them to each other, but that would put quite a strain on all of the poor extraverts that we would just be using as social boosters.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Perseus

Stars said:


> Yes, but apparently being introverted is only socially acceptable for women. For guys, it's a sign that they're
> "antisocial". :tongue:


*

This is only when the Wolfman ENTJ is in charge. 

Robin Hood*


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## thewindlistens

Oh look, another guide on how to be the perfect human being. Good that some people see the definition of it so clearly.


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## Sem

I'm the nice guy. That one I knew already. I'm always there for everyone, and to be kind to others seem to turn people off. And my personal solution leads me to another problem: I'm the independent guy. When I feel people don't need or respect me, I just disappear. And when they call needing help, I'm there again.

Oh, for christ sakes, I'm a freaking martyr. Hahahahaha


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## Mutatio NOmenis

Have you considered busting some balls or doing a half assed job for people who mistreat you?


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## ape

Mutatio NOmenis said:


> Have you considered busting some balls or doing a half assed job for people who mistreat you?


A weasel's life strategy


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## WickedQueen

Sometimes I date introvert guys. Although I find them boring, I feel comfortable dating them. They don't talk much and don't mind doing some activities in silent.

Like when I went for a date weeks ago with this introverted guy, we sat on a cafe all day without having any conversation. He plays with his internet game on his laptop and I read a novel. We sat beside each other. Every 15 minutes or so, he hug and rub my back, and I hold and kiss him. I consider that as a nice and sweet date. :blushed:


.


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## Perseus

*Merry Monk*



Perseus said:


> *
> 
> This is only when the Wolfman ENTJ is in charge.
> 
> Robin Hood*




Maybe, I should have said the *Merry Monk*. 


ESTJ have a low boredom threshold. They are a bloody nuisance.


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## WickedQueen

It's not my fault if you're a boring person.


.


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## thewindlistens

Boringness is in the eye of the beholder. 

Or in whatever else that would make a better analogy, I'm tired.


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## Mikbert

thewindlistens said:


> Boringness is in the eye of the beholder.


http://api.ning.com/files/UtmAmLRQw...IOHd1RRmGvEdrImglDTIJfbbpKoly0Po/beholder.jpg


Which one? ;D


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## thewindlistens

The central one, particularly if you're a caster.


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## Mutatio NOmenis

WickedQueen said:


> It's not my fault if you're a boring person.
> 
> 
> .


 I'm not boring. If you could hear my thoughts, I'd be the most frightening person ever; not boring in the least.


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## WickedQueen

Oh, I wasn't talking to you, Mutatio NOmesis. I was talking to Perseus. :crazy:


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## Mutatio NOmenis

I know. I did it for the lulz.


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## Matt

so yeah im shy, the nice guy, too independent and afraid of commiment...sigh. and i cant speel it either.


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## Mutatio NOmenis

That didn't stop Zachary Taylor from getting lucky.


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## Jorge

Here's one that hasn't been mentioned, and unfortunately, SHOULD be included.










*YOU ARE UGLY

*You were expecting this not to show up so you would get some self esteem about being average-looking? Just look around! Who is getting the dates? Who is making out with random strangers at every party? Who bounce out of serious relationships with more easiness? BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE.

We live in a predominantly shallow society, especially if you live in the U.S.. Do you really think that a girl will be able to overlook those glasses that look like they were made out of the bottom of a coke bottle? Most won't. Do you think many girls will want to walk by your side, when you are so fat you are taking 90% of the sidewalk? 

Face it. Looks matter. Girls will have a harder time rejecting someone who looks like Johnny Depp, that someone who looks like he just got out of the world of warcraft convention. Us guys are worse than that, I am actually willing to say that men are more shallow than women. That STILL doesn't away the fact that many women are, and that an attractive look shows character and power.

I am not saying, in any way, that if you don't look like Brad Pitt, you are fucked. I am just saying, lose the comic book nerd beard, stop using those dreadful videogame t-shirts, and pleeeeease get a freaking haircut.

You don't like the rules of the game? Then stop trying to be in it.

Do I agree with this? No... I am completely depressed that it is such a standard in modern society. I am not shallow, I really value knowledge, I really value creativity, independence... and if you really are all of those things, that's good, but at least try to not turn people away from with the first impression you give!


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## Harley

Jorge said:


> Here's one that hasn't been mentioned, and unfortunately, SHOULD be included.
> 
> 
> 
> *YOU ARE UGLY
> *


Haha! They totally missed the big fat elephant in the room, for sure.


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## MasterDood

Jorge said:


> YOU ARE UGLY


Harsh... But people are inherently shallow-to some degree. If someone tries to tell me they aren't shallow, I tell them they are lying. When you look at someone who dresses like crap and has messy hair, you make a dozen assumptions and judgements about that person and that alone may make or break whether or not you want to meet that person. Most people prefer hygiene and _do_ like to look at their partners from time to time. This is about as harsh of a comment as I'll ever leave, but this is very much so a part of why this thread may exist. This is an extreme, though-this is UGLY! I have some far below average friends get with way more girls than my good looking friends. That said, people aren't entirely shallow, but to avoid looks altogether and say it isn't a factor is a bold faced lie. Sad, but entirely true. Good thing this is something we can deal with, unlike, say: BEING A DOUCHE BAG.


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## Narrator

Jorge said:


>



I'd do him. Seriously, he's adorable, but also fisteh .

It's like:



Liminality said:


> Attractive things in a man:
> 
> *...*
> 
> And finally;
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> What can I say, I'm a little odd.
> 
> Who else has a thing for Salad fingers?


There's something inexplicaply appealing about them both.





 There we are, not so alone.


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## Donovan

Wiked.... i'm not trying to sound like a dick here, but you seem to be pretty ignorant. i'm pretty damn introverted, but i will talk the hell out of someone, once i get to know them, or if something interesting is being said. i see introversion as energy levels and how you get that energy. 

ah, that being said, i think i'm single because i will completely go with how i feel. so if i don't feel like talking, i just won't, so people see me as stuck up. also, if i am attracted to a girl, my way of going about getting her attention is to completely avoid her. great plan, huh? lack of self confidence and what not. which is wierd, because once people get to know me, they really like me. maybe the biggest reason of why we are all single (those of us that are and would rather not be) is because we can't see ourselves how others see us. whether we are assholes, and think we're god-like, or whether we're actually really cool people, but can't see it in ourselves. so in other words, we can't change, or get in touch with what we can't see.


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## SweetBride202

This is so funny and all of it are so true. There should be women version of this.


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## RetroPengo

Oh my. I simply cannot believe that I matched up to EVERY SINGLE ONE of those 20.

Oh wait, no, wait, yeah.... no? Crap. I lost track. Stupid ADHD. :crazy:

What were we talking... OH LOOK AT THE KITTY!


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## Mutatio NOmenis

I'm reviving this thread.
I am no longer single. It's all a matter of luck.


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## thewindlistens

Lists like these...

Men are judged for their personality, women for their looks. Somehow, this makes men acceptable targets while women are not (in either category). Seeing how there are no lists like this one floating around telling women not to be fat and the like. On the contrary, that's supposedly perfectly acceptable and is met with sympathy. While both are equally difficult to overcome, they require a person to change their lifestyle.


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## cardinalfire

*Reason 21*

You chose to be single


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## windex

You forgot indifferent! which goes back to independent. But it's fun


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## ThatGuy01

"There comes a time in your life when you have to either man up and deal with your insecurities or face the fact that you’re going to *die alone*."


Shit...


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## lonewolf

ThatGuy01 said:


> "There comes a time in your life when you have to either man up and deal with your insecurities or face the fact that you’re going to *die alone*."
> 
> 
> Shit...


I thought the same thing. :laughing:
My biggest problem is how ridiculously shy I am. I could never initiate a conversation with a woman I'm interested in. Also I am a little independent but if I found the right person then that wouldn't be a problem.


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## ThatGuy01

lonewolf said:


> I thought the same thing. :laughing:
> My biggest problem is how ridiculously shy I am. I could never initiate a conversation with a woman I'm interested in. Also I am a little independent but if I found the right person then that wouldn't be a problem.



Yeah same here, theyd have to start the conversation with me. Which will never happen lol


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## NotSoRighteousRob

I'm in love with myself, the only thing I don't understand is if it's so obvious to me why isn't it so obvious to them that I am perfect?


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## Preeb

I'm a slob
a pervert (kinda)
Broke... most likely
selfish... NO!
too shy... IRL, YES! on the internet, NO!
Nice Guy... oh, yes, thats me.
Addicted to gaming... guilty of charge, although its miniature games like Warhammer (not the online game, the real strategy game with real models) and boardgames which take up my time. roud:


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## zwanglos

I used to be the nice guy, and I would hold the door for strangers, especially for women. Some women got angry at me about that for some reason. Something about not respecting their equality or something?

Now I just let the doors close in their faces. It's especially gratifying if their arms are full.

I'm hopeless.


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## Preeb

zwanglos said:


> I used to be the nice guy, and I would hold the door for strangers, especially for women. Some women got angry at me about that for some reason. Something about not respecting their equality or something?
> 
> Now I just let the doors close in their faces. It's especially gratifying if their arms are full.
> 
> I'm hopeless.


They'd get angry at you? Wow, people are weird... :dry:


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## perennialurker

Hahaha, I AM boring. Also I agree that the fact that I am an INTJ and 5w6 certainly doesn't help either. Also the shy thing, to some extent.


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## intj123

perennialurker said:


> Hahaha, I AM boring. Also I agree that the fact that I am an INTJ and 5w6 certainly doesn't help either. Also the shy thing, to some extent.


My thoughts exactly, I'm boring and shy (to most people), but the alcohol is your friend thing, well I tried that this weekend at a club and let's just say things got wild, I'm like an estp when I got the right buzz, when I'm 1 drink away from yacking is when I get wild and crazy, any more or any less and I won't be partying.

Also, they should add one thing, take off your glasses (if you wear any), yes it's a little shallow but let's just say you will find a dancing partner 20 times faster and with 1/20 the effort, I literally put it to the test, walked in with glasses and in the middle of it took them off and though my vision was blurry fairly cute girl popped out of nowhere to dance with me within seconds of taking them off.


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## Alice in Wonderland

Preeb said:


> They'd get angry at you? Wow, people are weird... :dry:


hehe I'm one of them weird people. :tongue: *not really but I can understand why someone would*



zwanglos said:


> I used to be the nice guy, and I would hold the door for strangers, especially for women. Some women got angry at me about that for some reason. Something about not respecting their equality or something?
> 
> Now I just let the doors close in their faces. It's especially gratifying if their arms are full.
> 
> I'm hopeless.


pfft spiteful much?

Like I can appreciate your good intentions zwanglos, to you it prolly just seems like a nice, perhaps even mildly romantic gesture, but realise that your doing it "espically" for women feels is special treatment. It fees like your implying what? I'm too fragile to open a door for myself? I'm frail? I'm entitled? what?

I'm pretty biased myself because my Dad is always doing this, and it's supposed to be polite but sometimes when he does it it just feels like a slap in the face -a way of him being in control. He'll do it when we are in the middle of an argument. It's really hard to explain.

But trust me it gets annoying.

The main is this: women _do _want to be treated as equals. If you did it for genders equally not just "especially" women then there would be no problem. But you do. Most women, myself, I'd want to be treated equally in all respects, than experience a "perk" every now and then. Becuase women, we gave up on a lot of the old tyme "perks" that so often were'nt even lived up to back in the day, for freedoms that are ten million times more important to us. It isn't the gesture its self that is wrong, it's everything that it implies, the times of inequality and belief that women are delicate and inferior that it seems to stand for. That's why they get mad. And considering how your not a woman and will never understand what it's like to be one or to know what they might have been throught to give them that perspective, I don't think you can blame them.


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## perennialurker

intj123 said:


> My thoughts exactly, I'm boring and shy (to most people), but the alcohol is your friend thing, well I tried that this weekend at a club and let's just say things got wild, I'm like an estp when I got the right buzz, when I'm 1 drink away from yacking is when I get wild and crazy, any more or any less and I won't be partying.
> 
> Also, they should add one thing, take off your glasses (if you wear any), yes it's a little shallow but let's just say you will find a dancing partner 20 times faster and with 1/20 the effort, I literally put it to the test, walked in with glasses and in the middle of it took them off and though my vision was blurry fairly *cute girl popped out of nowhere to dance with me* within seconds of taking them off.


 
Or at least you thought she was cute, remember you didn't have your glasses on though.:wink:


----------



## zwanglos

> pfft spiteful much?


Nah, the 'satisfaction' was just an exaggeration. I don't really have any feelings invested into this phenomenon these days.



> Like I can appreciate your good intentions zwanglos, to you it prolly just seems like a nice, perhaps even mildly romantic gesture, but realise that your doing it "espically" for women feels is special treatment. It fees like your implying what? I'm too fragile to open a door for myself? I'm frail? I'm entitled? what?


No. My parents just instilled in me that men are supposed to act in a certain 'gentlemanly' way, which includes holding doors for 'ladies.' Having random women yell at me about it, though, made me reassess just what a 'gentleman' is, and what a 'lady' is supposed to be (aside from the physical gender differences, of course). I'm still not sure what the answer is.

It's really confusing for us men, though. On the one hand, there are women such as yourself who criticize men for holding doors for them in this fashion. On the other hand, there are even more women (including my mother and many female friends I've had) that get upset and/or insulted when I _don't_ hold the door open for them. They consider it rude.

I can't please all people all of the time, just some people some of the time.



> I'm pretty biased myself because my Dad is always doing this, and it's supposed to be polite but sometimes when he does it it just feels like a slap in the face -a way of him being in control. He'll do it when we are in the middle of an argument. It's really hard to explain.


Even harder to understand...



> But trust me it gets annoying.


Yes, that's why I stopped doing it, once I realized many women felt like this.



> The main is this: women _do _want to be treated as equals. If you did it for genders equally not just "especially" women then there would be no problem. But you do. Most women, myself, I'd want to be treated equally in all respects, than experience a "perk" every now and then.


Oh, I understand the sentiment. I don't think you should assume you speak for 'most' women, though, because many women I meet get upset if I don't act gentlemanly and hold a door for them. I'm not psychic, though, so these days I err on the side of caution and just ignore the whole situation. I think it's primarily (but not necessarily) a generational thing. I don't know your age (nor will I ask; I know better :tongue, but my mother's and grandmother's generations (from what I can tell) tend to _strongly_ disagree with your sentiment.

Also, I think you should be really careful when saying things like "I'd want to be treated equally in all respects." Example: the current social norms dictate that men should never cry, but it's more acceptable for women to cry (not even necessarily to show that they're upset - many women cry even when they're happy). If I were to treat you equal "in all respects", then... what, I'm supposed to browbeat you and make you feel ashamed for shedding tears? I'd be interested to know your thoughts on that.

Well, either that, or it would need to be made socially acceptable for men to cry. But I've had women browbeat me and make me feel ashamed if ever I've cried, so... make up your minds, eh?



> And considering how your not a woman and will never understand what it's like to be one or to know what they might have been throught to give them that perspective, I don't think you can blame them.


It's not that I blame some women for feeling this way, but it's certainly not like there's a universal consensus between women on this matter (at least, not yet).

Also:


> I can appreciate *your* good intentions zwanglos





> It fees like *your* implying what?


*bonks you on the head with the Grammar-Hammer*

_your_ is the possessive pronoun, while _you're_ is the contraction for _you are_.

*puts away the Grammar-Hammer*

I (constructively) criticize everyone's poor grammar, men and women alike :tongue:


----------



## amanda32

Zwanglos:

I get insulted if men don't hold open the door or let me go first.
If the guy walks ahead or goes first I feel like his dog. I'll think he has no manners.
But I've seen some women tell guys off for this, so I know what you mean.
It better to be yelled at by a few classless women, than to insult a classy one.
Don't change.


----------



## HandiAce

I love unintentionally scaring people... Mwah ha ha ha ha!


----------



## Kalifornia310

in other words men are freaking awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## jkikerx78

I started off as "the nice guy"...now I'm "too *Independent*".


----------



## Lark

Marino said:


> There’s nothing wrong with being single, but at some point most people reach the point of wanting a relationship. If you reached that point a while back, but still haven’t had any luck, you might want to check this list to see if anything sounds familiar.
> 
> *You’re Shallow*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> If within a few seconds of meeting a woman you have already calculated an estimate of her weight and located any problem areas where cellulite might lurk on her body, you may hereby consider yourself *shallow*. No matter how hot she is, you’re inevitably going to find her flaws. You will likely remain single until you _get over yourself_.
> 
> *You’re Too Independent*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> Being a bachelor certainly has plenty of perks. You don’t have to wait that extra hour for her to get ready for an outing, and you generally come and go as you please. The thing is, at some point you may actually no longer want to be all alone, and you’re going to have to compromise. Give up a bit of your independence to avoid growing into a lonely old man.
> 
> *You’re Afraid of Commitment*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> Tying into your fierce sense of independence is your equally strong fear of commitment. On top of losing your freedom, you don’t want to get married, only to get divorced later and lose half of your stuff. The future is unpredictable, and you can bet that once you settle down, you’ll meet a woman who is hotter, smarter and more successful than the one you’re with. Oh, and she’s going to flirt with you, but too bad – you’re in a committed relationship. Knowing this, you have every right to fear commitment, but getting over that fear *is what men do*.
> 
> *You’re a Slob*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> 
> 
> 
> Source
> You need a shave and a haircut. Your dirty laundry is more like a mildew-laced pile of odorous rags, so you wear your t-shirt inside out. There is leftover food on your desk from last week. What’s not to love? Look around, then look at yourself in the mirror. Are you a slob? _Chicks don’t really dig slobs_.
> 
> *You’re a Douchebag*
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> Source
> Get your collar popped and layer on that spray-tan – let’s talk about why you’re still single. Could you be a douchebag? Some women actually like douchebags, but these ladies are generally not the type you’d take home to meet mom. If you want to meet a nice girl, you’re going to have to tone it down a notch. Or several.
> 
> *You’re Addicted to Gaming*
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> 
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> 
> Source
> If by some divine intervention, you actually manage to acquire a _girlfriend_ between day-long bouts of questing, you’re probably in for a let-down since she won’t be around long. You need to cut back, drastically, on your playing habits if you want to maintain a relationship. Just remember, your guild isn’t going to keep you warm at night.
> 
> *You’re Desperate*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> Desperation reeks. It’s a fact. Men who are desperate repel women. If you are initially cool enough to get a woman’s phone number, by no means should you ever call her more than twice without her returning your call. She may be busy when you call, but if you call repeatedly, you are ensuring that she will never call you back, and even worse, she’ll hope to never see you again.
> 
> *You’re the Nice Guy*
> 
> 
> 
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> 
> Source
> You’re always helpful, polite, and kind – the type of guy every woman wants, right? Apparently not. Guys that are _too nice_ have a more difficult time moving out of the friend zone than guys who act like _complete dicks_. Some women even perceive excessive niceness as a weakness of character. You shouldn’t go full douchebag, but don’t be afraid to be a little hard, at times. It just lets her know you’re not a doormat.
> 
> *You’re a Control Freak*
> 
> 
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> Source
> It’s your way, or the highway. There’s no room for compromise in your life. You like things the way you like them, and as long as everything goes according to your plan everything is cool. If you throw a temper tantrum the moment something is out of your control, you may need to lighten up a little.
> 
> *You’re Too Shy*
> 
> 
> 
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> Source
> 
> There comes a time in your life when you have to either man up and deal with your insecurities or face the fact that you’re going to die alone. If you don’t have any confidence when approaching women, enlist some friends to help you out. You may need to serve as a wingman for a while, but pay attention to what the pilot is doing. Observe him and learn how the game is played. And remember this: *Alcohol is your friend*.
> 
> *You’re Selfish*
> 
> 
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> Source
> Did you fail “Sharing” in kindergarten? If you only ever think of yourself, get used to it because you’re the only person you’ll have to consider as you’ll be single for a while. If you can bring yourself to be a little less self-absorbed and a little more considerate, you may have a shot at a relationship. Try putting others before yourself a little more often.
> 
> *You’re Broke*
> 
> 
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> Source
> If you’re broke all the time, how can you expect to maintain a relationship? You don’t have to buy a girl expensive gifts, but she will like to go out from time to time. If you’re tired of being single, you’ll have to work some dating funds into your budget.
> 
> *Your Friends Are Assholes*
> 
> 
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> Source
> It’s true, you’re judged by the company you keep. If you hang out with jerks, you’re likely a jerk too. Even if you’re not, you can’t stop your friends from acting like assholes and ruining any relationship you might have. Get some better friends.
> 
> *You’re In Love With Yourself*
> 
> 
> __
> Sensitive content, not recommended for those under 18
> Show Content
> 
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> Source
> You’re wonderful and perfect. You don’t need a relationship because everything you do, say and have is so delightful there is really no void to fill. It must be great to be you.
> 
> *You’re a Workaholic*
> 
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> Source
> Being career and goal-oriented isn’t a flaw, but it may take away relationship opportunities. If you’re too busy to have any kind of social life outside of work, you’re already married – _to your job_.
> 
> *You’re a Pervert*
> 
> 
> __
> Sensitive content, not recommended for those under 18
> Show Content
> 
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> Source
> We all think about sex – a lot. However, if you fail to disengage your eyes and mouth from your perverted thoughts you will repulse women. If you are looking for a relationship, you will need to learn this skill. It’s also a good idea to learn how to clear your cache and browser history.
> 
> *You’re In Love With Your Ex*
> 
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> Source
> Your relationships may never work out if you’re still hung up on the one that got away. It’s best to move forward and let it go, especially if you’re looking for something new. No woman wants to live in the shadow of your ex. It’s also pathetic, so get over it.
> 
> *You’re Boring*
> 
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> What were you saying? Sorry, I fell asleep. You’re boring. Nobody wants to listen to you tell the same unfunny stories over and over. We’re sure your cat is awesome, but come on. Be interesting if you’re going to talk so much, otherwise just shut up and work the mysterious angle instead.
> 
> *You’re Obnoxious*
> 
> 
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> Source
> You always interrupt when people are speaking, usually to interject a random rude comment. You’re loud and you’re the only person who thinks you’re funny. You’re like nails on a chalkboard to most women, so _grow up_ and try listening to people for once.
> 
> *You’re a Liar*
> 
> 
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> 
> Source
> Telling her that her ass doesn’t look big in those jeans isn’t a lie, it’s self-preservation. Telling her you were at church while you were at the racetrack is a lie. You only have to get caught in one big one to spoil something that could have been nice. Have the balls to tell the truth, _just don’t be brutal about it_.


Is there anyway that I can e-mail this to myself? I want to have it incase the site is offline for a bit again.


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## android654

One reason the OP missed... "You're not even trying."


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## Deja Vu

I'm the independent one. Thats just how I do it.


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## Slider

Good list even though it's a bit offensive, particularly, when it attempts to convince us that alcohol is our friend. F**k that noise.

Also, I used to play a lot of WoW and still managed to acquire a girlfriend. Granted, once the relationship grew more serious I stopped playing.

I might be a little shallow. I recall going on a date with a girl I went to college with, she was attractive and generally nice. Her personality wasn't to my liking, but I enjoyed her company. What makes me shallow is when I saw her ass and it happened to be bigger than I prefer.

So, I like thinner women. Is that wrong? Because this list makes it seem wrong and wants us to lower our standards and make exceptions.

I'm also broke, but that's another issue entirely.


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## Aßbiscuits

this is all really obvious stuff.


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## zwanglos

assbiscuits said:


> this is all really obvious stuff.


I was actually unaware that being an obnoxious, boring liar was just as much of a turnoff as being a shallow, slobby pervert.

I did not know that.

And I learned something today.


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## Cytine

Has anyone else noticed other people with the perception that the opposite sex is just a bunch wild and elusive creatures that are impossible to understand? They seem to view even an individual person under the same blanketed, stereotyped viewpoint that they do the rest of the gender as a whole.

I mean maybe I'm completely wrong but it seems like everyone I talk to thinks like that subconsciously, and that seems exceedingly detrimental to potential relationships.


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## Cytine

Also I've never found nice, independent guys to be a turn off ever. In fact it's a requirement.


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## Cytine

ahh I can't figure out how to delete my messed up post. I'm a noob..


----------



## Cytine

Alice in Wonderland said:


> The main is this: women _do _want to be treated as equals. If you did it for genders equally not just "especially" women then there would be no problem. But you do. Most women, myself, I'd want to be treated equally in all respects, than experience a "perk" every now and then. Becuase women, we gave up on a lot of the old tyme "perks" that so often were'nt even lived up to back in the day, for freedoms that are ten million times more important to us. It isn't the gesture its self that is wrong, it's everything that it implies, the times of inequality and belief that women are delicate and inferior that it seems to stand for. That's why they get mad. And considering how your not a woman and will never understand what it's like to be one or to know what they might have been throught to give them that perspective, I don't think you can blame them.


I completely agree with you. I believe completely in being considerate. However I'm equally considerate to everyone. 

Not to stray off topic but one thing I've noticed coming out of the wood work recently, that is particularly outrageous to me, is a certain mentality among some men. The idea is, that because women want equal "rights" (treatment), that these men are completely justified in beating a woman if that lady were to disrespect them in some way. They seem to think that beating up another gentleman for the same disrespect is also warranted even though something tells me a guy of that sort would think twice before getting into a physical fight with another guy who potentially has a good chance of being able to defend himself. 


There is so much wrong with that thought process to me. Have you ever encountered this before?


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## zwanglos

This was something I was hinting at earlier.

[Note: I will never ever hit a woman]

But what I was getting at is that many feminists use the blanket-statement that men and women should be perfectly equal in all ways. That argument is inherently flawed, though, especially for the reason you just outlined above. Feminists seem to want to have their cake and eat it, too. Then there are the feminists who want to have their cake and eat it, and then maybe take someone else's cake out of spite (in reference to the super hardcore feminists that advocate the obsolescence of men - yeah, I've seen those too).

There are fundamental differences - physical, mental, emotional - that inherently make men and women unequal. 'Unequal' is a dangerous word to use here, but still appropriate, depending on what we're talking about.

Even if we're not talking about physical strength... many women can't even take the kind of harsh, verbal insult that would normally be geared towards men. "I can't believe you said that!" ... and then they cry. And then all men within a 2-block radius come and beat the shit out of the guy who said it :crazy:

So saying you want to have 'equal rights' is a good thing, but the poorly defined blanket statement of wanting 'to be treated equally in all respects' is just fucking absurd.


----------



## android654

zwanglos said:


> [Note: I will never ever hit a woman]


You shouldn't beat people regardless of gender, violence is a faculty that's used as a last resort in any situation. 




> Even if we're not talking about physical strength... many women can't even take the kind of harsh, verbal insult that would normally be geared towards men. "I can't believe you said that!" ... and then they cry. And then all men within a 2-block radius come and beat the shit out of the guy who said it
> 
> So saying you want to have 'equal rights' is a good thing, but the poorly defined blanket statement of wanting 'to be treated equally in all respects' is just fucking absurd.


 
I think you're cofusing female for spineless. Some people, infact I'm willing to go out on a limb and say most people can't handle people and the world at large. There are people both male and female that are crippled by words and actions of others.

I urge all men and women at the behest of generations to come, learn to make the distinction between weak and strong, because women aren't homogeneous.


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## zwanglos

Hmm, good points, actually.



> You shouldn't beat people regardless of gender, violence is a faculty that's used as a last resort in any situation.


I only fight in self defense, and rarely at that. Though if a woman were pointing a gun at my head I suppose I'd be confronted with a moral dilemma...


----------



## lonewolf

zwanglos said:


> Hmm, good points, actually.
> 
> 
> 
> I only fight in self defense, and rarely at that. Though if a woman were pointing a gun at my head I suppose I'd be confronted with a moral dilemma...


I don't get why men refuse to hit a woman even in the most ridiculous circumstances. Most women would say they have no problem striking a male. I guess because they think men can take it more than women can due to the stereotype that men are tougher than women (tougher is not necessarily equivalent to stronger). Yet for some men, they wouldn't hit a woman even if she was threatening to cut his balls off!! I'm reluctant to hit anyone, regardless of gender. However, if someone was threatening me or especially someone I cared for with a gun, I wouldn't hesitate to use force, woman or not.


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## Cytine

lonewolf said:


> I don't get why men refuse to hit a woman even in the most ridiculous circumstances. Most women would say they have no problem striking a male. I guess because they think men can take it more than women can due to the stereotype that men are tougher than women (tougher is not necessarily equivalent to stronger). Yet for some men, they wouldn't hit a woman even if she was threatening to cut his balls off!! I'm reluctant to hit anyone, regardless of gender. However, if someone was threatening me or especially someone I cared for with a gun, I wouldn't hesitate to use force, woman or not.



I think if a person really is desperate enough and needing to defend themselves, then certain actions are more excusable and the person would probably be more justified. The problem I had with the scenario I posed earlier had more to do with the rationalization of violence against the ladies as being excusable because women want "equal rights." 

Really equal rights refers to equal opportunities in the work place generally.

And I agree there are major differences in women and men that make them unequal, however I don't think those differences make one superior to the other. I think of this in the same way I view other cultures and it seems like a lot of people see other cultures as inferior because of their differences/inequalities.

It's also really strange to me how perceptions people have skew the meanings of words and give negative connotations to them, like how feminism is now viewed. And I suppose that is because of some of the extremists who are more female-chauvinistic than anything, like the types zwanglos mentioned. But to me it's really just the need for respect and the same human consideration everyone should get. It's just the need to be taken seriously and to not automatically be considered inferior or incapable. I feel like thats just a basic human need that everyone has.

Anyway I'm rambling. :tongue:


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## Cytine

android654 said:


> I urge all men and women at the behest of generations to come, learn to make the distinction between weak and strong, because women aren't homogeneous.


I really appreciate this comment. :happy: I was very clumsily trying to say something in the spirit of that, in an earlier post. And I think a lot of women have the same incorrect perception that men are homogeneous as well.


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## luige06

I'm just single because I'm too different to date.
Some girls like hat though, but I can't seem to find a girl I like back really... I just can't stand being controlled
I think all these go for the single ladies too.


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## Repus

None of those fit me, and honestly tons of "douchebags" have girlfriends.


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## android654

Cytine said:


> I really appreciate this comment. :happy: I was very clumsily trying to say something in the spirit of that, in an earlier post. And I think a lot of women have the same incorrect perception that men are homogeneous as well.


Peole who fit archetypes of stereotypes don't interest me in the slightest. I think the key is to seek people who's personalities interest you.


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## mylifemyradio

I'm single because I'm too emotionally needy and sensitive.

I'm working on that though.


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## OlderGuy

I know some married pervs, douchebags, nice guys, all of it. Good concept but by no means foolproof.


----------



## Wien1938

To OP.



Hard to find intelligent women my age (late twenties).
Dislike pubs, clubs and noisy (read- overtly extrovert) events, Feel very, very bored and out of place.
Am actually interested in the idea of marriage (meeting, settling down, children etc) - hint: does not bring any interest as watching women friends attempt to do this again and again with useless and untrustworthy bastards.
Have to know someone as a friend before I could consider them as a mate.
Don't drink to a great degree (a couple of glasses of whisky or rum per week maximum). Most dates/pulling seem to revolve around getting legless and waking up in a stranger's bed.
Cannot consciously do "chatting up" but have been told that when in a proper conversation (whether fun, serious or deep) I have been "really chatting her up" because she was actually interested in what I had to say. Am I misunderstanding something here? Can you actually treat a woman like an equal or is that against the rules?
Am deeply interested in academic subjects, politics, philosophy and ideas. Hint: don't come across as clever, they'll run a mile. And no, I do not mean being "arrogant" or "showing off", since it is perfectly possible to have a very pleasant conversation about intellectual subjects as well as the likely form of Manchester United (hooray!).
Seriously, being nice is not a good idea. Women seem to be infatuated with an idea of "rescuing" or "turning" the bad-boy around. They want to be bull-dozed but on their terms (gah!). I blame romantic fiction :laughing:.


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## Caila

My ex is the selfish one.  Usually I'm the one who pushes out my emotions, and too soon, so it's especially shitty when my partner is a selfish bastard. :angry:


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## Daimai

inebriato said:


> NEERD.
> I watched my friend play that game, and I laughed at the seriousness of his game playing.


You... have to be kidding me. Is there somewhere in life you CANT be serious with?

Should definitely add "You are an INTJ" to the list.


----------



## Caila

lonewolf said:


> I don't get why men refuse to hit a woman even in the most ridiculous circumstances. Most women would say they have no problem striking a male. I guess because they think men can take it more than women can due to the stereotype that men are tougher than women (tougher is not necessarily equivalent to stronger). Yet for some men, they wouldn't hit a woman even if she was threatening to cut his balls off!! I'm reluctant to hit anyone, regardless of gender. However, if someone was threatening me or especially someone I cared for with a gun, I wouldn't hesitate to use force, woman or not.


It depends on how strong the woman/man is. Usually men are stronger than women, and the male should restrain the woman, or simply walk away and realize if she hit him once, it was out of irrationality and anger. Standing for a few minutes, wondering why she hit you then punching her in the face in return, is not self defense. It is uncontrolled anger. I could say the same thing for the female as well. Yet, like I said...if a woman is smaller and weaker, the male shouldn't hit her back just because it hurt. That's a pussy way to handle the situation. 
Don't hit back, call the police. Durp.


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## lonewolf

Caila said:


> Standing for a few minutes, wondering why she hit you then punching her in the face in return, is not self defense. It is uncontrolled anger.


Obviously, but I was talking about an extreme situation in which the male was actually in danger and would be required defend himself in order to prevent any further harm done to him. I say this because I know some males that would choose to get hurt (possibly permanently) rather than use force to defend themselves from a woman. Although most say they would probably defend themselves if their life was in danger but only if it was life threatening.


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## Caila

lonewolf said:


> Obviously, but I was talking about an extreme situation in which the male was actually in danger and would be required defend himself in order to prevent any further harm done to him. I say this because I know some males that would choose to get hurt (possibly permanently) rather than use force to defend themselves from a woman. Although most say they would probably defend themselves if their life was in danger but only if it was life threatening.


(Funny icon you have there, what is wonkas mbti?)

Anyway, what exactly is your idea of a dangerous situation?

I've been in a situation where the guy punched me in the face because I hit him first, for his verbal abuse against me, for my taking his shit for months. No excuse for my violent reaction, under any circumstance, which is good of me to admit, otherwise I would have an anger problem. Not a violent person by nature, but sometimes I believe most INFPS to lash out to defend themselves, uncharacteristically I suppose. Like shattering rose colored glasses.


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## Linesky

Oops, wrong thread...


----------



## justinhammar

That really sucks, Caila.


----------



## Caila

Did anyone mention this:

*You're Stupid*


----------



## justinhammar

Well just take a look at my avatar duhz caila.


----------



## Preeb

I would most likely hit any person if needed to defend myself, woman or not... if you have to resort to such demeaning means then it hardly matters what gender the offensive person is.


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## justinhammar

Would you hit me, Preeb? Something tells me you wouldn't.


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## Preeb

Depends on your size, naturally. Bigger than me... foul tricks... alot bigger than me... run away... no way to run... even fouler tricks, possibly a sharp item :crazy:
Although I'd prefer to run.


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## justinhammar

You better run, little boy.


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## Caila

Preeb said:


> Depends on your size, naturally. Bigger than me... foul tricks... alot bigger than me... run away... no way to run... even fouler tricks, possibly a sharp item :crazy:
> Although I'd prefer to run.


Actually size doesn't matter sometimes. I've known skinnier men than me and they were 100 times stronger. It's strength and most women don't work out and can't defend themselves (me being one of them) so if you decide to hit a female in response because of your stupid logic, then be prepared to have the outcome of her being badly hurt or bruised easily. Also, lawl..be prepared to go to jail for the marks you left on her, or him...if they're weaker than you. 

Are you going to beat the shit out of an anorexic? learn2knowstuffsplz


----------



## Slider

INFJGirlie said:


> Plus I really think it's a bad idea that your mom comes along on your dates, come on you're 36. Also don't pull out your Star Wars actions figures at dinner, it's deal breaker for sure.


 
So, have I ever told you about my Princess Leia fantasy?


----------



## sky604

Lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## SuperunknownVortex

Wow. That's like the most bullshit I've read in a long time. 

How about you're a single man because you 1. haven't ask another man, woman or tranny out, or 2. have asked another man, woman or tranny out and they said 'no', or 3. have asked another man, woman, or tranny out and after the first date realized that neither you and/or your date didn't want to pursue it further.

I mean, seriously.


----------



## desperado44

Can't it be "you just haven't met a girl you want to settle down with?"

Or...."you like being a bachelor?"


----------



## android654

desperado44 said:


> Can't it be "you just haven't met a girl you want to settle down with?"
> 
> Or...."you like being a bachelor?"


I actually tend to see it as people are far too obsessed to be aligned with someone, for fear of being alone. Then the relationship continues because of the codependent nature they've now come to know as the norm.

I think most people have to learn to be more comfortable with themselves before they start ruining another person's life, regardless of gender.


----------



## Jojo

android654 said:


> I actually tend to see it as people are far too obsessed to be aligned with someone, for fear of being alone. Then the relationship continues because of the codependent nature they've now come to know as the norm.
> 
> I think most people have to learn to be more comfortable with themselves before they start ruining another person's life, regardless of gender.


Nope. I have rode solo more than not. I understand that there are exception I may be one. Though that is a rather sad approach if you think relationship ruin people.

However, I have found it interesting that most not all people that point out the fear of being alone is from the person who says. My last gf was with some a a day after we broke up. She was married twice and has had some with her most of her life but, yet she says I am afraid to be alone. Never married, and picky about my dates.


----------



## Equilibrium13

Aha, I'm pretty shy, and I'm probably one of the nicest guys out there. *Sigh*:frustrating: Oh, and a bit of a slob XD I'm too often in my own little world........................................


----------



## AllintheMind11

I'm single mainly because I'm just fucking sick of a lot of shit in this world.

Have a nice day :3


----------



## Rogue Eagle

Slider said:


> So, have I ever told you about my Princess Leia fantasy?


Glad I'm not alone here 
Any girl I've ever been with knows about my princess leia obsession. I always got told to stfu


----------



## mrscientist

I hope in this fantasy you are not Jabba


----------



## skycloud86

What is the actual attraction for people who fantasise about Princess Leia?


----------



## SenhorFrio

skycloud86 said:


> What is the actual attraction for people who fantasise about Princess Leia?


 She is pretty much the only positive female role model that i can think of. she isn't some bimbo or emotional wreack like alot of the females protrayed in media. she can take care of herself, she dosen't need a man to save her she just shoots the bad guy. unlike many tough females in media shes is a "good guy"and isn't overly violent. i don't exactly fantasise about her but she does have many positive traits i love to have in a partner.


----------



## android654

SenhorFrio said:


> She is pretty much the only positive female role model that i can think of. she isn't some bimbo or emotional wreack like alot of the females protrayed in media. she can take care of herself, she dosen't need a man to save her she just shoots the bad guy. unlike many tough females in media shes is a "good guy"and isn't overly violent. i don't exactly fantasise about her but she does have many positive traits i love to have in a partner.



The only one, really?


----------



## SenhorFrio

android654 said:


> The only one, really?


 the only one i can think of off the top of my head.


----------



## android654

SenhorFrio said:


> the only one i can think of off the top of my head.


Umm, off the top of my head... 

Dark Angel










Batgirl











Faith


----------



## Selden

SenhorFrio said:


> She is pretty much the only positive female role model that i can think of. she isn't some bimbo or emotional wreack like alot of the females protrayed in media. she can take care of herself, she dosen't need a man to save her she just shoots the bad guy. unlike many tough females in media shes is a "good guy"and isn't overly violent. i don't exactly fantasise about her but she does have many positive traits i love to have in a partner.


----------



## android654

Selden said:


>


mmmm Sarah Connor. Which reminds me of...


----------



## Rogue Eagle

skycloud86 said:


> What is the actual attraction for people who fantasise about Princess Leia?


her boobs.


----------



## cnelsonc

I'm an intj who's just too brutally honest. How can I be a bit more subtle but still efficiently get across what it is i need to say? I have to deal with a lot of sensors and feelers a lot.


----------



## Cindjor

this thread is why you're all still single.

to everyone who just posted above me


----------



## Garrett Petersen

I'm a little bit married to my job...


----------



## Psilocin

I know exactly what my problem is and why I don't have a fine lady by my side. 
I smoke too much pot and I'm a mess. 

All I'd have to do is clean up, really. Lol


----------



## NexT

I lol'd a little bit.

I can shape up if I had a reason to.


----------



## Orafaun

android654 said:


> Umm, off the top of my head...
> 
> Dark Angel
> 
> Batgirl
> 
> Faith


I think you missed the "Not overly violent" part.


----------



## McKie

I've been single for almost 1 and a half years now, I think the main thing is that I enjoy it too much, aside from that, I typically am too shy and I'm afraid of commitment, I tend to get too attached, and I find I just end up getting hurt, so it seems pointless for me to get involved if I already know the outcome...


----------



## Awesome

Wien1938 said:


> To OP.
> 
> [*]Seriously, being nice is not a good idea. Women seem to be infatuated with an idea of "rescuing" or "turning" the bad-boy around. They want to be bull-dozed but on their terms (gah!). I blame romantic fiction :laughing:.
> [/LIST]


Agreed. I too blame romantic fiction for women being obsessed with "Saving" the bad boy. (Although I am a hypocrite. I do like a bit of Jane Austen's work(She was in the end a victim of her own high ideals though, or else she was just a lesbian.:laughing:LOL)


----------



## Ming

LOL, if a guy who had to be single for any one of these reasons, there's going to be no couples at all.


----------



## Ikari T

I fit into some of those reasons. I missed those days when I was in a relationship. I realized I was actually happier during those times.


----------



## Female INFJ

McKie said:


> I've been single for almost 1 and a half years now, I think the main thing is that I enjoy it too much, aside from that, I typically am too shy and I'm afraid of commitment, I tend to get too attached, and I find I just end up getting hurt, so it seems pointless for me to get involved if I already know the outcome...


I've been going through this for a while now. It seems like there is some balance, and some opportunity cost to starting a relationship. I don't feel my odds are too good in long-term relationships to begin with. But in the past I continued to make attempts. It does feel like a lot of hurt being endured, for a similar probable outcome. I guess that is where risk factor becomes involved. It could all be about timing and finding the right person too, that makes it worthwhile. But I can from my end say that I've experienced similar and it keeps me single. I just thought to write because I related to this post so much! Carry along men, with reasons why you are single...


----------



## Rayne

Hmm, well, the only thing I'd consider myself on that list is shy, and possibly boring X-D I like to game but I don't chose gaming over people. I'm honestly thinking of creating a thread like this for women X-D


----------



## geGamedev

Alice in Wonderland said:


> hehe I'm one of them weird people. :tongue: *not really but I can understand why someone would*
> 
> 
> pfft spiteful much?
> 
> Like I can appreciate your good intentions zwanglos, to you it prolly just seems like a nice, perhaps even mildly romantic gesture, but realise that your doing it "espically" for women feels is special treatment. It fees like your implying what? I'm too fragile to open a door for myself? I'm frail? I'm entitled? what?
> 
> I'm pretty biased myself because my Dad is always doing this, and it's supposed to be polite but sometimes when he does it it just feels like a slap in the face -a way of him being in control. He'll do it when we are in the middle of an argument. It's really hard to explain.
> 
> But trust me it gets annoying.
> 
> The main is this: women _do _want to be treated as equals. If you did it for genders equally not just "especially" women then there would be no problem. But you do. Most women, myself, I'd want to be treated equally in all respects, than experience a "perk" every now and then. Because women, we gave up on a lot of the old time "perks" that so often weren't even lived up to back in the day, for freedoms that are ten million times more important to us. It isn't the gesture its self that is wrong, it's everything that it implies, the times of inequality and belief that women are delicate and inferior that it seems to stand for. That's why they get mad. And considering how your not a woman and will never understand what it's like to be one or to know what they might have been through to give them that perspective, I don't think you can blame them.


I wish more people were like you, or it was at least more commonly seen/heard-of. If I reach the door first, I open it regardless of gender. If not, you can get it yourself and hold it for me. I've been told there's something wrong with that mind-set, personally I think the opposite is BS.


----------



## Azure Bass

Me with my ever-high values could say that I am...

- too independent,
- I'm a nice guy that needs to embrace his inner aggressiveness.
- by the description, a control freak. I'm uptight, only controlling over surfaces that belong to myself.
- Too shy. Like I said, I'm aggressive, but don't want to step on toes.
- Not a slob, just disorganized (and I like it that way). No pizza stains leave this house alive.
- Not broke, just stingy. 
- I'm a workaholic, just not as much as the picture shows. Global solutions?
- I could be mistaken as boring 'cause I'm shy when I strive to be interesting while others ARE boring or close themselves off to me since I look and act reserved until someone else opens up or I am interested in something. (others relating to community. ex: me: "What's up?" friend: "nothing you?" me: "thinking about event 1, doing event 2, on my way to event 3..How are things?" then they open up.)


----------



## PhillyFox

Marino said:


> *You’re the Nice Guy*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> You’re always helpful, polite, and kind – the type of guy every woman wants, right? Apparently not. Guys that are _too nice_ have a more difficult time moving out of the friend zone than guys who act like _complete dicks_. Some women even perceive excessive niceness as a weakness of character. You shouldn’t go full douchebag, but don’t be afraid to be a little hard, at times. It just lets her know you’re not a doormat.


I never understood this. Hands down I would much rather date a guy that's too nice than a complete asshole. At least I won't end up having a strong urge to punch you in the face after we go out. Even if he's not rude to me but to other people, it's a complete and utter turn off.


----------



## Surreal Snake

The only reason i am single is because i want to be.


----------



## Surreal Snake

Women want to change men,anyone who says i'm wrong has never been in a relationship.


----------



## PhillyFox

Kevin INFJ said:


> Women want to change men,anyone who says i'm wrong has never been in a relationship.


Some women do, but some women don't. Some have actually come to accept that people don't change, and if you want to change someone, why in the hell did you fall in love with them in the first place?!


----------



## Surreal Snake

Some people are assuming this was a negative statement.It wasn't.As far as i am concerned,women are generally healthier than men in many aspects of life.I think women want to change us because we need to be changed.Being single also means i have to deal with everything on my own.As any single parent understands,one income,no support and one being alone is difficult indeed.Generally, i find life alot easier with someone telling me what to do occasionally instead of me making all of the decisions alone.It is a pleasure i wish i had right now.


----------



## Surreal Snake

PhillyFox said:


> Some women do, but some women don't. Some have actually come to accept that people don't change, and if you want to change someone, why in the hell did you fall in love with them in the first place?!


Love?I never mentioned the word.


----------



## PhillyFox

Kevin INFJ said:


> Some people are assuming this was a negative statement.It wasn't.As far as i am concerned,women are generally healthier than men in many aspects of life.I think women want to change us because we need to be changed.Being single also means i have to deal with everything on my own.As any single parent understands,one income,no support and one being alone is difficult indeed.Generally, i find life alot easier with someone telling me what to do occasionally instead of me making all of the decisions alone.It is a pleasure i wish i had right now.


Self-improvement and having your SO encourage you is one thing. Someone forcing you or nagging you to change is another. I don't see how it's a woman's job to change her guy. I always thought that both partners should learn a lot from each other and work on improving themselves and looking towards one another for support.


----------



## JoetheBull

I fit 7 of those reasons. 9 if you don't count the halves I thought where half relating to me. So I guess this means I am going to die single with no chance :laughing:


----------



## Female INFJ

Kevin INFJ said:


> Women want to change men,anyone who says i'm wrong has never been in a relationship.


Kevin INFJ - I imagine this statement is partly due to your deep intuitive ability. Most INFJ males that I have been conversing with seem to have this ability to see through many layers, with ease. I am in awe. But this aside. I think when two people are together, neither of them goes through life without changing. And as a pair, naturally there may be compromises and transformations that happen also. Perhaps by default changes will happen to a man, and a woman notices some things need to be improved. and / or in some cases, he may choose to change, because it is a positive thing to do. There are choices. 

I think most women have caught up with the fact that another person can be changed to their liking. But I think a lot of men like to be in relationships, and are open to suggestions to improve. A lot of men honestly, need some different perspectives to look at things, and may benefit from gentle suggestions. I don't think it is healthy or realistic for a woman to have a 'desire' to completely change her man. If she feels some adjustments are necessary, this is quite normal. 

I agree to a degree, with your statement here Kevin INFJ. But I think the wording maybe is missing something. I am no expert on relationships for sure. But I am the type of woman that always tries to pick a guy that has major qualities that suit what I am looking for. The minor things, I can gloss over. But I don't have desire to change others, I want them to compliment me, and assist / challenge me to be better also. 

Perhaps I aim to high, but I would like a man who would be protective of me, and who is capable in areas I am not, so that I can learn, and maybe he can appreciate a few things about me too. But again I say, I'm not expert. but I know at least a man cannot be changed. Even he wants this, I'm not into putting in that kind of effort. 

Likely one of the reasons why I'm single too right now! hahaha But that is a whole other story, I suppose my comments would be more useful in a 'why women are single' thread elsewhere. I like men a lot, but to find the right one, it seems like such a hassle.


----------



## Unicorntopia

Kevin INFJ said:


> Women want to change men,anyone who says i'm wrong has never been in a relationship.


Yeah, we want to make them love more and have them show us more of their love.

If I do not want love from a guy it means I am not interested in being with them and I will end the relationship and let them do whatever they want.

Simply put.


----------



## Surreal Snake

Female INFJ said:


> Kevin INFJ - I imagine this statement is partly due to your deep intuitive ability. Most INFJ males that I have been conversing with seem to have this ability to see through many layers, with ease. I am in awe. But this aside. I think when two people are together, neither of them goes through life without changing. And as a pair, naturally there may be compromises and transformations that happen also. Perhaps by default changes will happen to a man, and a woman notices some things need to be improved. and / or in some cases, he may choose to change, because it is a positive thing to do. There are choices.
> 
> I think most women have caught up with the fact that another person can be changed to their liking. But I think a lot of men like to be in relationships, and are open to suggestions to improve. A lot of men honestly, need some different perspectives to look at things, and may benefit from gentle suggestions. I don't think it is healthy or realistic for a woman to have a 'desire' to completely change her man. If she feels some adjustments are necessary, this is quite normal.
> 
> I agree to a degree, with your statement here Kevin INFJ. But I think the wording maybe is missing something. I am no expert on relationships for sure. But I am the type of woman that always tries to pick a guy that has major qualities that suit what I am looking for. The minor things, I can gloss over. But I don't have desire to change others, I want them to compliment me, and assist / challenge me to be better also.
> 
> Perhaps I aim to high, but I would like a man who would be protective of me, and who is capable in areas I am not, so that I can learn, and maybe he can appreciate a few things about me too. But again I say, I'm not expert. but I know at least a man cannot be changed. Even he wants this, I'm not into putting in that kind of effort.
> 
> Likely one of the reasons why I'm single too right now! hahaha But that is a whole other story, I suppose my comments would be more useful in a 'why women are single' thread elsewhere. I like men a lot, but to find the right one, it seems like such a hassle.


Thank's for the compliment.I have much,much more to say on this but that is another thing.I guess what i meant to say was that most of the change that has happened in my life,(good and bad)i have been in control of.I would love to meet a woman and have a healthy,empathetic relationship.Yes,i don't expect my partner to change me.I would like that person to grow with me.


----------



## pinkrasputin

Kevin INFJ said:


> Women want to change men,anyone who says i'm wrong has never been in a relationship.


Well you know I've been in dozens of relationships. 

I don't want to change men. I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. I am an idealist and have an incredibly high standard. Before I even get into a relationship, there are certain things I look for. However, once I'm in a relationship, I tend to break off with men who are not giving me the things I need. I do this rather than expecting them to change. I do this instead of asking them to change. I place a high value on not changing a person. Only problem is, sometimes those men wish I would tell them _how they could change for me_ instead of walking away. I don't understand it, because I don't feel good about someone changing for me. But I can understand how they can get frustrated with me. 

These men seem to really want me to tell them what I don't like about them and they will "work on it". Another thing I don't like doing. I often say "You are fine the way you are. You are perfect the way you are. There is nothing wrong, I just don't think we mix/work well together." And then they get frustrated because they'd rather me be an argumentative type of person who says something like "I can't be with a man who watches football so please stop watching it." Or "I hate your friends, the way you communicate and show affection. Please change yourself and do things my way ". Why would I do that? They are a good person, they just aren't for me.


----------



## Hammerhand

I would prefer to be told what's 'wrong', seeing as i most likely would hold that relationship higher then my life (that's me), and me being a person open for change, willing to change, WOULD at the very least try to change. However, if i can't, i'd try to let them go, for their sake.

And at the very least, it might give me sort of insight, understanding or new perspective, that might influence the above, in a positive manner.

I've read this over a couple of times, not sure if i got it out the way i wanted..


----------



## Awesome

pinkrasputin said:


> Well you know I've been in dozens of relationships.
> 
> I don't want to change men. I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. I am an idealist and have an incredibly high standard. Before I even get into a relationship, there are certain things I look for. However, once I'm in a relationship, I tend to break off with men who are not giving me the things I need. I do this rather than expecting them to change. I do this instead of asking them to change. I place a high value on not changing a person. Only problem is, sometimes those men wish I would tell them _how they could change for me_ instead of walking away. I don't understand it, because I don't feel good about someone changing for me. But I can understand how they can get frustrated with me.
> 
> These men seem to really want me to tell them what I don't like about them and they will "work on it". Another thing I don't like doing. I often say "You are fine the way you are. You are perfect the way you are. There is nothing wrong, I just don't think we mix/work well together." And then they get frustrated because they'd rather me be an argumentative type of person who says something like "I can't be with a man who watches football so please stop watching it." Or "I hate your friends, the way you communicate and show affection. Please change yourself and do things my way ". Why would I do that? They are a good person, they just aren't for me.


I have to imagine that if you were in a relationship with a man and you told him this, then he would probably feel like he was constantly walking on glass as to try and not upset you.


----------



## Hammerhand

Awesome said:


> I have to imagine that if you were in a relationship with a man and you told him this, then he would probably feel like he was constantly walking on glass as to try and not upset you.


Now that you mention it, it might become some sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy. I know I'd most likely be deeply disturbed if I was involved with said something like that, which most likely would lead to some faked behavior, to try to be 'more' (That's what this creates, as far as I can see), which later leads to a break up when she realizes.

Am I doing this right?:tongue:


----------



## spoonforkknife

Any suggestions for an ENTP (maybe, possibly, slightly INTP) who is shy when getting close to women? Everything goes smooth, until I have to get close. I think it has to do with some things when I was younger, but still...


----------



## pinkrasputin

Awesome said:


> I have to imagine that if you were in a relationship with a man and you told him this, then he would probably feel like he was constantly walking on glass as to try and not upset you.


If I told him what? I don't tell them anything. If it's the end, it's the end. There is no walking on egg shells. Furthermore, when I first start dating someone we both know we are looking for compatibility. If it's not working, it's not working. 

What part of my post led you to believe I told a man something and he'd eventually he'd have to walk on eggshells? 



Hammerhand said:


> Now that you mention it, it might become some sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy. I know I'd most likely be deeply disturbed if I was involved with said something like that, which most likely would lead to some faked behavior, to try to be 'more' (That's what this creates, as far as I can see), which later leads to a break up when she realizes.
> 
> Am I doing this right?:tongue:


Again, if I said something like _what?_ What is this thing that you both seem to think I tell men I'm seeing? Is it that I say something like "I'm not out to try and change anyone. Please don't try to change me. Rather, let's respect each other and grow. I am not looking for the first thing that comes along. I would like to see if we first could maintain a friendship and see where it goes from there. Life experience has taught me: there is nothing worse than dating someone with whom you would never be friends."

Usually guys do not freak out because of the way I think or feel. I'm pretty laid back person and they appreciate being with a woman who isn't out to give them a makeover. I've never heard a guy walking on eggshells. If he is, than he was being fake to begin with. I want the _real_ person. No games. We all have to become ourselves eventually anyway. Relationships aren't about egos. They are about finding compatibility and chemistry. I believe anyone can find a date for Friday night. But even rockstars, supermodels, and billionaires have a hard time finding true compatibility. 

Be yourselves when you date. Allow a natural filter to do it's work. You shouldn't want someone anyway with whom you can't be yourself. And pretenses are dishonest and eventually hurtful to your partner once discovered.


----------



## Hammerhand

I got an impression, give me some time and I'll try to sort it out.

Edited: This part. It might boil down to insecurities/unstable sense of self, but this part gave me the impression, along with the rest of the post.

"However, once I'm in a relationship, I tend to break off with men who are not giving me the things I need. I do this rather than expecting them to change. 
I do this instead of asking them to change. I place a high value on not changing a person."

If someone I was in a relationship told me this, I'd interpret it as something IS wrong and that the person I'm involved with is preparing to distance herself to later break off. 
Which would, ehm.. shake things up pretty intensely for me.

Also, YOU are not changing someone, someone is changing them self to better please your needs, it doesn't even have to be some world-shaking changes, small things do great things.
Then again, unless you actually communicate this/similar, it shouldn't be a problem.

I have more to say, but I doubt it would be of relevance for you, seeing as you seem decided.


----------



## Neon Knight

Adjusting a couple of things is ok, changing yourself completely isn't. My last one did that and it annoyed me because when he broke up with me he said it was because I wasn't accepting of him. ??? If I wasn't I wouldn't have stayed with him for so long and been through all the crap that I did with him and found someone more independent, less eager to be exactly like me. It's ok to say you don't agree with someone's beliefs, politics, like their music, whatever. Just don't fake that you do, that is so irritating and transparent. And if something we said hurts you , tell us right then, not wait months or years and use it as an excuse to break up and blame us for things going sour. Authenticity, honesty and communication, willing to work at things when there is trouble in relationship, and not stay with us when things are actually bad and not say anything and staying until you find someone new to replace us. That's all I want and yet is so hard to find...:dry: That isn't much to ask is it?

[/rant] :frustrating:


----------



## DarklyValentine

cos i wont talk bollocks to a lady or quote the wicked shoe theorem..they cannot survive without
due ti their teeny brains


----------



## skycloud86

Dreamy McFumbles said:


> cos i wont talk bollocks to a lady or quote the wicked shoe theorem..they cannot survive without
> due ti their teeny brains


You know, women have smaller brains in general because they themselves are smaller in general. The brain of a typical woman is probably more efficient than a typical man's brain.


----------



## alphaLeo

Shallow and selfish here:shocked:


----------



## Milkweed

Ok, so I can work on a few things In no way am I completely like any of this I just have a tad of two of these


----------



## Wien1938

Because I have an almost unerring habit of liking young women who already have boyfriends...

Have just found out that the young lady I have been courting the last two and half months has a bloody boyfriend after all... It's like bashing my head against a brick wall...


----------



## Filo

Missing option: Because for the moment, I've really, really, REALLY had enough relationship drama for this year.

For the rest, just a bit of the workaholic thing.


----------



## ENTrePenuer

So these all apply

You’re a Liar
You’re Obnoxious
You’re a Pervert
You’re In Love With Yourself
You’re a Douchebag
You’re Afraid of Commitment
You’re Too Independent

What do I win?


----------



## Doom

Meh I rarely ever leave the house.


----------



## Codger

Bit of a cunt really.


----------



## mickey

Want to say something on the 'nice guys finish last' belief: back before I was married I didn't date much. There were a lot of guys I knew that would tell me all the time how the reason they couldn't find or keep a girl was because they were too nice and girls only liked assholes. A lot of the time, though, this guy HIMSELF was an asshole (yea, I was friends with some assholes) and he was incapable of seeing it in himself, whereas he could see it in all his friends. What was funniest about that, was that was why_ I_ wasn't dating him. Then I married a guy people think is semi-retarded cuz he really_ is_ nice. I'm not saying that all guys who think they are nice are actually unwitting assholes. I'm saying I don't believe that truly nice guys will ever finish last. I was unwilling to be with anybody who wasn't.


----------



## Mutatio NOmenis

Fizz said:


> Yeah, I have to agree with you here. I was just saying for aesthetic reasons, not for reproducing reasons. Hold off on the children, Mutatio, you're young, enjoy life while you still can!




I'll know it's time to be a parent when I start behaving like you.


----------



## Sali

Is it really so unreasonable to have a "fear of commitment" in a society where more than %50 of marriage ends in divorce? I'd prefer to keep all of the stuff I worked hard for.


----------



## Fizz

Mutatio NOmenis said:


> I'll know it's time to be a parent when I start behaving like you.


How would you define my behavior?


----------



## The Proof

I'm a workaholic AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA :tongue::crazy:


----------



## Unicorntopia

etherealuntouaswithin said:


> here's Ten:
> 
> 1)Fickle, and easily prepared to shift my interests.
> 2)Misunderstanding of my perspectives and criticism leads me to fear of closeness
> 3)as of now NOT much of a priority
> 4)I'm generally overlooked for the Macho and pain-in-the-ass meathead.
> 5)When someone is interested in me,i sometimes sabatoge it...or merely ignore that person
> 6)I prefer Autonomy to do as i please and "follow a star" without the obligation of another upon my back...for now.
> 7)Dislike attempted competition and "games" relative to my affections..either you're in or you're not.
> 8)Can be very jealous and too emotional
> 9) An extreme fear of not being able to withold myself from "merging" with the other,thus losing my independence
> 10)Havn't really looked lol


Damn! Thats a good list! I can pretty much say all those things about myself too...


----------



## Cover3

etherealuntouaswithin said:


> here's Ten:
> 
> 1)Fickle, and easily prepared to shift my interests.
> *2)Misunderstanding of my perspectives and criticism leads me to fear of closeness*
> 3)as of now NOT much of a priority
> *4)I'm generally overlooked for the Macho and pain-in-the-ass meathead.*
> 5)When someone is interested in me,i sometimes sabatoge it...or merely ignore that person
> 6)I prefer Autonomy to do as i please and "follow a star" without the obligation of another upon my back...for now.
> *7)Dislike attempted competition and "games" relative to my affections..either you're in or you're not.*
> 8)Can be very jealous and too emotional
> 9) An extreme fear of not being able to withold myself from "merging" with the other,thus losing my independence
> *10)Havn't really looked lol*


#7 is so...... accurate, yet so puzzling, just like #4, I think i'm missing something here, no matter how I try to understand it I can never seem to put my finger on why these idiots get attention, it's really mind boggling.


----------



## Gatts

Independence is my deal. Not in any hurry.


----------



## Unicorntopia

Gatts said:


> Independence is my deal. Not in any hurry.


Ahhh, the original sin... Understandable roud:


----------



## skycloud86

Unicorntopia said:


> Ahhh, the original sin... Understandable roud:


What's the original sin?


----------



## Unicorntopia

skycloud86 said:


> What's the original sin?


Trying to be independant from God/everything/others/the universe from C.S. Lewis's book The Problem of Pain. You can take a look at it quoted here What I Think - PersonalityCafe at my blog to see how I relate it to what I think.


----------



## radiantdawn

Let's see... Desperate, too shy, the 'nice guy'...

I guess being a gay teen is part of it too = X >_< D =


----------



## tannguyen1

I'm probably single because I haven't tried. Even if I do try I would be to picky.


----------



## Alexz

firedell said:


> NEERD.
> I watched my friend play that game, and I laughed at the seriousness of his game playing.


I live with a roommate who plays that crap on a consistent basis. Yes, he's single.


----------



## Xavier

Mikbert said:


> lol, I don't qualify for any of those, I guess you should add *You're a type 5 sp/so/sx INTJ.*


I'm a type 5w4 sp/so/sx INTJ. Your statement is true. I'm going to die alone.


----------



## lumpunzik

I think I'm a workaholic who has too much to get done (and has too little time to get everything done). I get tread upon by my 'work' as a student. And I'm really boring when I'm obsessed with getting my work done on time, because it unconsciously nags me to death if I don't. GAH.

Other than that I don't really relate to any of these, unless I'm completely missing something about myself. Thoughts, ladies? That might not be answerable since I'm relatively new here.


----------



## Cellar_Door

My perception and generalizations of life and people seemingly inevitably draw me to my lonesome ways,
as misanthropic as that might sound.
Maybe I am shallow, But i'd prefer to be single rather than waste potentialities and time on someone who evidently isn't right for me,
Especially when in that time I could miss someone who IS right for me?
And compromise just doesn't seem to do its justice judging by the hell fire reigned from past experience.
( I know I sound like i'm generalising far too much )

Possible to add "you're too much of an Idealist" to that list?
I think my fantasy of how things should be is my true problem.
I just want to find an INFP girl =\
Someone who I can relate to~


----------



## Herussell

Hey dude these things are really nice but now what should we do, Please give me some tips to be in a relationship with a girl.


----------



## Ezra

Mikbert said:


> lol, I don't qualify for any of those, I guess you should add *You're a typ 5 sp/so/sx INTJ.
> 
> 
> *EDIT: btw, world of warcraft is actually a really good game


Get with an ESE! They're always on the lookout for cute nerds.


----------



## Darkestblue

Because I don't play by the rules.


----------



## Fizz

Jazzanova said:


> Because I don't play by the rules.


I'd like to imagine you in sunglasses and a leather jacket.


----------



## Darkestblue

Fizz said:


> I'd like to imagine you in sunglasses and a leather jacket.


Exactly.


----------



## Deja Vu

I'm an ENTP and will die alone. After plenty of sex, mind you, but still - alone. And that is fine with me.


----------



## Veeg

Deja Vu said:


> I'm an ENTP and will die alone. After plenty of sex, mind you, but still - alone. And that is fine with me.


Sounds horrible to me.


----------



## justcritic

It's simple. I'm too smexy for yo mama


----------



## TaylorP

Mikbert said:


> Hey, WoW is serious buisness!!


F*** that Sh**.

Internet Spaceships is Serious business.

EVE Online makes WoW look like a butter knife compared to a Steak knife.

I am non of those mentioned, maybe add, Is completely fucking clueless and cant find a reason to date or get in a relationship besides sex. lol


----------



## Raiderguy

I'm SINGLE NOOOOOOOOOOOOO............ wait...... YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY


----------



## Michael82

yeah love depends on all those things

if you find THE reason to love you will use THAT reason to break up 

not thinking about those requirements makes your love last longer, more sincere, etc. etc.


----------



## Stephen_Mirabito

I find it very hard to be myself when I first meet people. Thus I give off conflicting signals, things usually don't work out.
Which is pretty upsetting considering I've blown a lot of potentially good relationships this way.

Single for life I guess!!!!!!


----------



## BroNerd

Many of these reasons apply to me but the one which really stands out is "You're too shy". 
I get incredibly nervous around women I am interested in..absolutely terrified. 
I have been hurt horribly in the past which makes things worse.


----------



## The13thGuest

Why must these sorts of things determine whether you attract/get women or not?
Every woman is different and likes different things. I guess no woman likes a liar- but that's about it.


----------



## skycloud86

The13thGuest said:


> Why must these sorts of things determine whether you attract/get women or not?
> Every woman is different and likes different things. I guess no woman likes a liar- but that's about it.


It's generalising a lot. You should the equivalent one for women, it's even worse and much more sexist towards women than this one is towards men.


----------



## Alexz

firedell said:


> NEERD.
> I watched my friend play that game, and I laughed at the seriousness of his game playing.


Same. I just leave when I see my roommates wasting time on it.


----------



## TheSeer91

addicted to gaming, too shy, too independent and too cool don't know what your missing ladies :wink:


----------



## mvp

I love my best friend


----------



## Chief

firedell said:


> NEERD.
> I watched my friend play that game, and I laughed at the seriousness of his game playing.


And we laugh at women's seriousness when shopping for their 56th pair of shoes, and then telling us they need a purse to go with it, and then of course a new shade of eyeshadow, blush, and then.... and then... and then....


----------



## skycloud86

Chief said:


> And we laugh at women's seriousness when shopping for their 56th pair of shoes, and then telling us they need a purse to go with it, and then of course a new shade of eyeshadow, blush, and then.... and then... and then....


She wasn't laughing at men or at the stereotype of (nerdish/geekish) men, she was just laughing at how serious her friend was taking the game.


----------



## Surreal Snake

In my personal opinion because there is very little acceptance.People usually want/try to change me.Rather be Free.Not saying not physical,just on guard.


----------



## Ezra

Women might want different things, but most of these are pretty much surefire way to scare off the cream of the crop. If you don't take heed, you won't get the women you want.


----------



## Mutatio NOmenis

I'm now single because I've decided to stop putting myself through grief when I know from the outset that I probably will fail just like all the other times and that I'm going to never see most of my dating pool again in 2 months anyway.


----------



## Aaron Boal

I think being an INTJ is a relationship killer of sorts. We want relationships but can't stand the small talk and flirting. We want a get in there and it's done sort of thing.


----------



## Mutatio NOmenis

Ezra said:


> Look in the library/bookshop. Stereotype but true.
> 
> Just ask, fuck rejection. Act natural. She's more likely to reject if you're self-conscious than if you're natural.


Then why hasn't it worked for me the several hundred other times I've tried while acting naturally.


----------



## Romascu

Mutatio NOmenis said:


> Then why hasn't it worked for me the several hundred other times I've tried while acting naturally.


 It pleases me when i see people call bullshit on these politically correct fake terms.

Women don't care about your personality, that only matters to the _duration_ of the relationship, not really relevant to starting it.

In my case it's a combination of ugly and weird looking, if you know yourself and can be honest with yourself you will find the reason.


----------



## skycloud86

Romascu said:


> It pleases me when i see people call bullshit on these politically correct fake terms.


What exactly makes it either politically correct or fake, and why do you think he was calling bullshit on it? He was asking why acting natural had not had the effect he wanted.



> Women don't care about your personality,


And you would know for sure? Spoken to every woman on the planet? Have sources to back up this claim?



> that only matters to the _duration_ of the relationship


So they don't care about your personality, then they do care?



> not really relevant to starting it.


So it must be rather important to the relationship then, if it helps keep the relationship going?



> In my case it's a combination of ugly and weird looking,


Generally, women tend to place less value on men's appearance than men do in regards to women's appearances, although there are many exceptions, and in modern society male appearance may have more value attributed to it now than it would have done hundreds of years ago.



> if you know yourself and can be honest with yourself you will find the reason.


Isn't that just acting natural, which you claim is bullshit political correctness?


----------



## Romascu

skycloud86 said:


> What exactly makes it either politically correct or fake, and why do you think he was calling bullshit on it? He was asking why acting natural had not had the effect he wanted.
> 
> 
> 
> And you would know for sure? Spoken to every woman on the planet? Have sources to back up this claim?
> 
> 
> 
> So they don't care about your personality, then they do care?
> 
> 
> 
> So it must be rather important to the relationship then, if it helps keep the relationship going?
> 
> 
> 
> Generally, women tend to place less value on men's appearance than men do in regards to women's appearances, although there are many exceptions, and in modern society male appearance may have more value attributed to it now than it would have done hundreds of years ago.
> 
> 
> 
> Isn't that just acting natural, which you claim is bullshit political correctness?


 Don't have time to respond to the others, will prolly do later.

Acting natural is a thing i agree with, i was calling bullshit the fact that acting natural (if you are different) gives you better chances than not acting natural.


----------



## Mutatio NOmenis

Romascu said:


> Don't have time to respond to the others, will prolly do later.
> 
> Acting natural is a thing i agree with, i was calling bullshit the fact that acting natural (if you are different) gives you better chances than not acting natural.


I've got a mild case of Asperger's, so if I act entirely naturally, then I come across as a freak. I spend a lot of energy pretending to be at least normal. It's why I act so cold and constrained all the time.


----------



## 69waystolove

I get zinged in being a nice guy and being too shy.


----------



## Romascu

Mutatio NOmenis said:


> I've got a mild case of Asperger's, so if I act entirely naturally, then I come across as a freak. I spend a lot of energy pretending to be at least normal. It's why I act so cold and constrained all the time.


I got a strong case of "i'm from another fucking planet and i fucking hate you".

So yeah, we are similar in that regard, i always use a honest, if brutal approach and always come out as a freak, because 1. i am and 2. i want to give the full me, not only to women but to all people, it's a filter to rule out the common folk, the average joe/july---i really fucking hate those two.

What can i say man, i had no friends for years, until i started meeting fucked up people, *real* people that were fucking awesome and accepted me for what i am and didn't give a fuck and i didn't give a fuck either, that's how i met them.

Not to disappoint you, but even with those kind of girls, same things applied , you look good enough --you're in (guess in what) , if you don't --- it's gonna be the still fucking *no*

Just be yourself and you will attract others like you.

If you pretend and try to be something you're not, you will attract fake plastic scum.


----------



## Romascu

> What exactly makes it either politically correct or fake, and why do you think he was calling bullshit on it? He was asking why acting natural had not had the effect he wanted.


Already addressed this.



> And you would know for sure? Spoken to every woman on the planet? Have sources to back up this claim?


Sorry , i was in a hurry and my replay was less than coherent.

They do care about personality , they care more about it when in a relationship, rather than when starting it, they care about that too when starting it, but it's negligible compared to the physical aspect.

Sources: personal experience, anecdotal proof, careful observation, some psychology and sociological studies on issues related to this one.



> So they don't care about your personality, then they do care?


Addressed it above.




> So it must be rather important to the relationship then, if it helps keep the relationship going?


To the relationship itself yes, but in order to start a relationship she has to say yes to the first date or something, and personality plays a minor role in getting that first yes.





> Generally, women tend to place less value on men's appearance than men do in regards to women's appearances, although there are many exceptions, and in modern society male appearance may have more value attributed to it now than it would have done hundreds of years ago.


I think western women are liberated by their financial status, hundreds of years ago they used to disregard their man's looks, because they were either starving or deeply rooted in the moral dogma of the time, or both.
Nowadays most women in the western culture have enough money to lead a reasonable life so the concept of "romantic love" comes into play, a concept only recently invented. (in the case of the majority of the population, romeo and julietee were some of the few deviants of their time)




> Isn't that just acting natural, which you claim is bullshit political correctness?


Addressed this.

Also skycloud, you seem like a really nice guy, hope you have the strength to face those crass, major disappointments that are intrinsic to your way of thinking.

I once saw the world as you do now, if you can believe it.


----------



## Mutatio NOmenis

Romascu, as nice as this forum is, do take care to not be overly aggressive, demeaning, or personally insulting. Those are offenses that we take pretty seriously to here. This is a wonderful place and you do not want to be banned from it. I've seen far too many people banned for being flame-happy jerks. Please do keep it cool and tactful.

Addendum: The place for caustic vitriol is spam world in the venting section.


----------



## Cover3

I'd like to be able to subscribe to magic thinking, but I live on a planet/city which, more and more, seems entrenched in something called hard, cold reality. Truth is, merely being 'natural' won't do you any good if you don't try to talk to girls, which isn't something I excel at at all, there's also a reality that can't really be ignored, unless you go out to clubs(bar girls usually don't bother) or have an already big pool of friends which are connected to another big pool of women, where is it you're supposed to go? School? it's a possibility, but then again it's not ideal, and you have to have a great amount of assertiveness, and since most guys from 17-25~ all seem to be douchebags in an everlasting pissing contest to where the girls that are usually most desirable, will usually choose the loudest obnoxious guy for some reason, which leaves shit(shit as in nothing) for the more low-key guys, no matter how 'natural' he may be, so that leaves the guy who doesn't get out much(see the ''I'' in INTP) with not much to go on with, which is sad since I've been told by numerous friends(guys) and their girlfriends that I'm the funniest person they know, something that's commonly appreciated by women(or so they say), and probably would have the 'tools' to be at least somewhat active in that department was it not for my lone-cowboy attitude coupled with a staggering lack of assertiveness, amongst other things.



Romascu said:


> I got a strong case of "i'm from another fucking planet and i fucking hate you".
> 
> So yeah, we are similar in that regard, i always use a honest, if brutal approach and always come out as a freak, because 1. i am and *2. i want to give the full me, not only to women but to all people, it's a filter to rule out the common folk, the average joe/july---i really fucking hate those two.
> 
> What can i say man, i had no friends for years,* until i started meeting fucked up people, *real* people that were fucking awesome and accepted me for what i am and didn't give a fuck and i didn't give a fuck either, that's how i met them.
> 
> Not to disappoint you, but even with those kind of girls, same things applied , you look good enough --you're in (guess in what) , if you don't --- it's gonna be the still fucking *no*
> 
> Just be yourself and you will attract others like you.
> 
> If you pretend and try to be something you're not, you will attract fake plastic scum.


I can relate to the bold, even if you do have a tight group of friends, that's nice and all but it may not translate to a girlfriend instantly, but then again it depends on the frequency by which you actually do get a chance to talk to a woman.

I'll also point out that looks are good, (to spark initial interest), I consider myself reasonably attractive, (when not depressed and having sleeping issues) and it just turns out that this beautiful chick once was into me and let me know about it, but then she probably thought I wasn't 'experienced' enough as evidenced by his apparent sudden change of heart, as the Beatles say ''love has a habit of disappearing overnight!' 

Some may see this as a defeatist post, maybe it is you know, but unfortunately, perception doesn't make reality for average folks, nor does magic thinking(unless you're at MSNBC or FOX etc.).


----------



## Romascu

Cover3 said:


> I'd like to be able to subscribe to magic thinking, but I live on a planet/city which, more and more, seems entrenched in something called hard, cold reality. Truth is, merely being 'natural' won't do you any good if you don't try to talk to girls, which isn't something I excel at at all, there's also a reality that can't really be ignored, unless you go out to clubs(bar girls usually don't bother) or have an already big pool of friends which are connected to another big pool of women, where is it you're supposed to go? School? it's a possibility, but then again it's not ideal, and you have to have a great amount of assertiveness, and since most guys from 17-25~ all seem to be douchebags in an everlasting pissing contest to where the girls that are usually most desirable, will usually choose the loudest obnoxious guy for some reason, which leaves shit(shit as in nothing) for the more low-key guys, no matter how 'natural' he may be, so that leaves the guy who doesn't get out much(see the ''I'' in INTP) with not much to go on with, which is sad since I've been told by numerous friends(guys) and their girlfriends that I'm the funniest person they know, something that's commonly appreciated by women(or so they say), and probably would have the 'tools' to be at least somewhat active in that department was it not for my lone-cowboy attitude coupled with a staggering lack of assertiveness, amongst other things.
> 
> 
> 
> I can relate to the bold, even if you do have a tight group of friends, that's nice and all but it may not translate to a girlfriend instantly, but then again it depends on the frequency by which you actually do get a chance to talk to a woman.
> 
> I'll also point out that looks are good, (to spark initial interest), I consider myself reasonably attractive, (when not depressed and having sleeping issues) and it just turns out that this beautiful chick once was into me and let me know about it, but then she probably thought I wasn't 'experienced' enough as evidenced by his apparent sudden change of heart, as the Beatles say ''love has a habit of disappearing overnight!'
> 
> Some may see this as a defeatist post, maybe it is you know, but unfortunately, perception doesn't make reality for average folks, nor does magic thinking(unless you're at MSNBC or FOX etc.).


The difference between us is that i don't need a woman and don't care about getting one.
I don't compromise to get a woman, and even if i did it would be no help.

I have nothing to lose and i enjoy the freedom brought on by that fact.


----------



## Cover3

Romascu said:


> The difference between us is that i don't need a woman and don't care about getting one.
> I don't compromise to get a woman, and even if i did it would be no help.
> 
> I have nothing to lose and i enjoy the freedom brought on by that fact.


okay, and you bother to come on a sex/relationship forum to rant because?...


----------



## android654

Cover3 said:


> okay, and you bother to come on a sex/relationship forum to rant because?...


Because copious masturbation sessions causes more frustration than it solves?


----------



## Romascu

Cover3 said:


> okay, and you bother to come on a sex/relationship forum to rant because?...


 It's fun for me to combat these ways of thinking and to have my say.

I need to have my say, because i haven't seen any opinions like mine , at least in this context and it just feels good.

I like to challenge the norm.

Being passive and complacent kills my soul.


----------



## Fizz

Romascu said:


> It's fun for me to combat these ways of thinking and to have my say.
> 
> I need to have my say, because i haven't seen any opinions like mine , at least in this context and it just feels good.
> 
> I like to challenge the norm.
> 
> Being passive and complacent kills my soul.


You aren't combating anyone's way of thinking. You're just interrupting the natural flow of the threads with angry contradictory rants.


----------



## Emerson

I Can Also Capitalise The First Letter Of Every Word, Essentially Invalidating The Noun. Can I Get Thanked For This? 

No? Good because its annoying and I don't want any thanks for this. Good god damn.


----------



## Fizz

Emerson said:


> I Can Also Capitalise The First Letter Of Every Word, Essentially Invalidating The Noun. Can I Get Thanked For This?
> 
> No? Good because its annoying and I don't want any thanks for this. Good god damn.


Wasn't going to thank you anyway, you ruined it with the capitalizing. But now the second line says you don't want a thanks...so conflicted...not thank because of capitalizing but thank because doesn't want thank...can't have "Schrödinger's Cat of Thanks".


----------



## Cover3

android654 said:


> Because copious masturbation sessions causes more frustration than it solves?


a case could be made, indeed


----------



## TechnoViking

I'm shallow (I think), desperate, the nice guy, and a liar. :/


----------



## Hardstyler

I'm single because I want to be. Society keeps trying to shove down my throat relationships are the only way to be happy. Fuck society. Also its because theirs *DEFINITIVELY* no women out there that 
A. Wants to be with me
B. Out of the Approximately 3 something billion women in the world there not 1 that's suitable 
C. "There's plenty of fish in the ocean" is bullshit when all the "pretty,smart,intelligent ect ect (insert posative quality here) fish" are caught by "douche bag fishers"


----------



## Brian1

Can't pick up the date, and take her home, and establish relationship because they don't own a car....(Good answer,must have reliable transportation, and the survey said show me a car...number 1 ). 

For ya young folks, there was a time when a show called the "Family Feud" was on tele-vision, long,long time ago. That's modeled on that.


----------



## hermitsmoores

hmmm....

1. I'm 32, and i don't know if i actually want to be in a relationship.
2. I love my independence and feel that being in a relationship might cage me
3. i know i'm fickle and i don't want to get into a relationship and then know 3-6 months down the line, that i'm bored and need to hurt her.
4. i don't want to get into a relationship and have her taken away from me.
5. all the girls i tend to fall for want nothing to really do with me.
6. i'm 32, i'm still young, i want to travel, see the world, live freely, and i really don't think i can do that while being in a relationship


----------



## Cleo

You could be single if you are treating people too objectively or your detached...? 

You could be single if you are too possessive and call too much; to the point where the girl isn't returning your calls, but you still keep calling. I mean when emotions are involved that is one thing, but otherwise, like when you barely know the person, it just looks desperate, pathetic, and low class.

You could be single if you have a habit of sharing yourself or have recently done so, even just kisses and rubs. It can make you desensitized to these acts in general, therefore all women look the same, or cause you to be attached to a previous person, therefore unavailable.


----------



## MegaTuxRacer

Hardstyler said:


> I'm single because I want to be. Society keeps trying to shove down my throat relationships are the only way to be happy. Fuck society. Also its because theirs *DEFINITIVELY* no women out there that
> A. Wants to be with me
> B. Out of the Approximately 3 something billion women in the world there not 1 that's suitable
> C. "There's plenty of fish in the ocean" is bullshit when all the "pretty,smart,intelligent ect ect (insert posative quality here) fish" are caught by "douche bag fishers"


You're realize that you're communicating that of the 6 billion people in the world, the only one not at fault for you being single is you, right? No women want to be with you (unlikely, but okay), no women are suitable for you (okay that rules out everyone), and all of the douchebags have taken all of the good ones (how is this a relevant factor given the previous two?). I mean everything about this post screams that your real desire is the be in a relationship, especially since you felt compelled to post your reasons why you're single in a thread about how to be in a relationship. I really do not see the relevance behind your post. Care to shed some light?


----------



## Hardstyler

mkeath said:


> You're realize that you're communicating that of the 6 billion people in the world, the only one not at fault for you being single is you, right? No women want to be with you (unlikely, but okay), no women are suitable for you (okay that rules out everyone), and all of the douchebags have taken all of the good ones (how is this a relevant factor given the previous two?). I mean everything about this post screams that your real desire is the be in a relationship, especially since you felt compelled to post your reasons why you're single in a thread about how to be in a relationship. I really do not see the relevance behind your post. Care to shed some light?


Lol im just over exaggerating


----------



## MegaTuxRacer

Hardstyler said:


> Lol im just over exaggerating


Damnit, you ENFPs need to use your over-use of punctuation and emoticons. Otherwise I think you're completely serious.


----------



## Chef_Sean

Haha, oh wow it's not looking good Captain. Check 7 off the list as affirmative.

Selfish, too independent, bit shallow (hey, I'm fit), bit shy, somewhat broke and too nice- ya my ex said that, apparently she thought I was showing weak character, lol. Rather be single than a douchebag, which is what I'd consider many dudes. Just sad to find that some women are that ludicrous when pegging a man's behaviour. Nope, my character or nice-guy-ness comes from Jesus ladies. Amen

Maybe it's because I don't have a relationship, but the only times I really wish I was in one is during societies more romantic holidays or family time. Yeah, I like my own time to go with the wind as I choose.


----------



## Jwing24

Live at home with parents at 25
low self esteem / confidence
don't know what I want to do for a career
introvert / not very talkative if nervous

Do I really need to add anymore? I don't think so.


----------



## Sup3rSloth

Well look out ladies. I am none of those things. The only thing I am is divine hunk-genious of a man. And I'm here to rock your world.







...:tongue:


----------



## kudi

> Well look out ladies. I am none of those things. The only thing I am is divine hunk-genious of a man. And I'm here to rock your world.


Heh, that sounds like self-worship to me, so fail. LOL. Some of you are causing your own failures, due to doubting your own abilities. If you want a romantic relationship its only a matter of time, after all throw enough mud at the wall some will stick. If you being single is a choice for you then that is great, you got some balls, probably more than two. 
Its a long list of potential flaws, seems like we all have a bit of all of them in us. I think its more about balancing those traits. I do think "your a pervert" one is unfair, aren't most guys perverts? ^_^.


----------



## dotMute

well these 20 thing just show:

-Women are materialistic bitches.
-Woman can't adapt, i mean WoW ain't that hard to play =P 
-We need to become closet alcoholics to get laid. 

No wonder im single.. =/


----------



## Veeg

dotMute said:


> well these 20 thing just show:
> 
> 
> -Woman can't adapt, i mean WoW ain't that hard to play =P
> -We need to become closet alcoholics to get laid.
> 
> No wonder im single.. =/


Those things are easy to get rid off, you know - and you definitely should. I mean, I really don't understand how people can acknowledge they have a big downside, and not do anything about it. Quit WoW, friend someone other than the liquor.

Profit.

BTW, about the materialistic part. Most, and probably almost all, just want a safe life. I'd look for a solid man if I was a woman too.

One way to spoil your evening, huh? (Or if you're smart, make your coming evenings better)


----------



## Nico1e

I didn't read this entire thread, so somebody probably already said this. Or maybe even the original post said this. Actually, I didn't read the original post either, I just read the thread title. 

One reason why there are a large number of single men is because the ratio of men to women is about 105/100 in many parts of the world. http ://en.wikipedia .org/wiki/Human_sex_ratio . That means there are 1,050,000 for every 1,000,000 women, so 50,000 of those men aren't able to have a monogamous relationship with a woman at any given time. (They could have a polyamorous relationship if a woman would have more than one boyfriend/spouse.) 

I should probably go read the beginning of this thread at least.

Edit... omg. I read the original post. That was awful.  I don't like man-blaming, especially ever since I read Warren Farrell's books. I should have known it would be a man-blaming post. Warren Farrell talks about the man's point of view - it is sometimes called 'masculism,' similar to feminism - and explains it in a sympathetic way.


----------



## Ephemerald

Nico1e said:


> One reason why there are a large number of single men is because the ratio of men to women is about 105/100 in many parts of the world. http ://en.wikipedia .org/wiki/Human_sex_ratio .


India and China are responsible for much of the deficit. The rest of the world is okay.


----------



## Nico1e

Ephemerald said:


> India and China are responsible for much of the deficit. The rest of the world is okay.


Maybe... But I looked this up a while ago and read the information they collected in the US Census. It was still true in the USA that there were more men than women, in the younger age groups.

However, I wonder if you are referring to the way that China sometimes kills female babies, because male babies are viewed as more desirable? I'm wondering where your idea comes from. (And I assume India as well.)

I know that whenever I've attempted to use dating websites in the past, it's like there are 100 guys on there for every one woman... slight exaggeration, but it *feels* like there are tons and tons of them. I've looked at member lists and there are more men than women using the sites, but that doesn't tell us about the general population, except in a very informal way.

I feel bad for them actually and I wish that I had some advice for what they could do about it, but I don't know. It seems sad to imagine that large numbers of men would just have to say 'It sucks to be me.'


----------



## Ephemerald

Nico1e said:


> ...


Perhaps. I've found it negligible. It also depends on the surroundings. At my last university (Slippery Rock), women comprised nearly 65%. In my current short-term career goal of nursing, it's more like 95%. Of course romance is the last thing on my mind, it's a professional tier in my medical endeavor, but from my point of view it appears the opposite. Then those statistics reverse late in life because the guy croaks--just when the selection is getting good! Can't wait myself!

Yes, I was getting at female infanticide. I'm occasionally gloomy in my periodic sarcasm.

I've seen your view personally. What kind of investigative scientist would I be had I not explored my share of women's studies and portrayed myself a woman in the anonymity of the internet? That's half the world's perspective I'm missing out on! I've never abused my role and always tried to portray myself the savvy, intellectual young woman with an array of interests. To be frank, much of the response I'd received in various places (YouTube and gamer sites for example) pissed me off more than anything and developed my real world necessity in expressing my views of feminism. Want to know? Walk in her shoes...

Kitchen jokes make me want to stab somebody. Same with _anything _sexist. _*Grrr!*_

Anyways, to make a long story short, most of those men are the losers, bothering everyone, and men are traditional initiators to boot. Ever follow one of them posting? Too bad most sites don't track that. On some pen pal websites I've visited, if you were a woman with a profile listing age between 20 and 30, the same kinds of guys (if not the same guys) would leave the same C&P lines, one after another. I feel sorry for the one kind enough to respond--the men have no interest whatsoever in who you are, just sex.

The ones who matter aren't systematically sifting through profiles. They're leaving meaningful responses which leave you reflecting, wondering and desiring to know more. I mean, if you're looking for romance with someone, why in the hell wouldn't you be interested in her character?

It's what makes her really her... unique and wonderful...

It blows my mind...


----------



## kudi

> That means there are 1,050,000 for every 1,000,000 women, so 50,000 of those men aren't able to have a monogamous relationship with a woman at any given time


Think that information needs to be chopped up a little more, don't think it takes into account age demographics. Women live longer than men and I don't remember but at birth one sex has higher risk of death. Age also determines if they are even capable or interested in a romantic relationship. The ratio varies by country as well. Russia is known for mail order brides due to the disparity of so many females to males, they look for men in other countries since there aren't enough of them in their home country.


----------



## DustyDrill

I'm only single because I enjoy mexican food. The butt trumpet is not the most romantic of instruments.

Hehe, fart joke. (<--- Why I'm ACTUALLY single)


----------



## Chief

Nico1e said:


> Edit... omg. I read the original post. That was awful.  I don't like man-blaming, especially ever since I read Warren Farrell's books. I should have known it would be a man-blaming post. Warren Farrell talks about the man's point of view - it is sometimes called 'masculism,' similar to feminism - and explains it in a sympathetic way.


I couldn't agree more, and women bashing is equally as disgusting. I think that's one of the main reasons you'll see, in this thread, one of three types of responses from men: 1) The bashing of the bashing--that is, trying to explain why the given reason(s) is(are) wrong from that person's POV. 2) Either sarcastic or satirical responses by men as to why they, themselves, are single or the worst of all 3) men who believe it's valid and are apologetic for being that way. The sexes should NOT, IMO, be bashing one another, and when one starts to bash the opposite sex, I believe it's best to take a good, long, hard look in the mirror as you do it as we are all flawed in one way or another. No matter what your flaws, there's someone out there who will love you FOR your flaws, not just in spite of them. I mean, if Richard Ramirez and Ted Bundy could find love and wives in prison, it's hard to argue there are any men who are incapable of finding a woman somewhere who will love them. The hard part, of course, is finding someone you love who loves you back. In any case, Bravo! for your edit! Definite Kudos!


----------



## Chief

Elsewhere1 said:


> Lol! You where non matching clothes with velcro shoes...............rotfl!!!


For women, they don't know the difference between "where" and "wear"....... ROFL! <sarc>
(Actually, I would hope women would find such a quality equally unattractive in men, and as I've posted elsewhere, there's actually some hard evidence women are taking intellect, success, and especially confidence into account over ANY physical quality, height included. In fact, several recent studies have shown women's choices in men are finally catching up with modern times and going away from an almost 200,000 year old trend which no longer has any bearing on a man's ability to provide for and give a woman's offspring the best chance at success, so BRAVO! for the modern woman!).


----------



## Dashing

I don't know how to flirt, or how to take hints. Often I heard stories about women 'digging' me, but I'm totally oblivious to that. I'll remain forever alone until I figure out how that works. I've had relationships in the past but the girls were after me and were not afraid to let me know. 

Also I'm broke a lot. Generous with what I've got though.


----------



## Elsewhere1

@*Chief

Lol! Thanks for pointing out that most embarrassing typo>>> I may have had a few to drink before typing that post, lmao now!!
*


----------



## LucasM

Honestly, if a female asked me out, I'd refuse. Never had made any overt advances. Had a couple crushes but a crush needs time and distance before I can overcome the irrationality. Not seeking but always open to the possibility.

Mainly: Why throw a rock into the still pond? So much better to let the rocks skip across the surface creating pretty ripples. Or maybe it is that I can never feel like rock and water have much in common. Of course, a pond would be aware of no other pond though one may lie just around the corner. Time is needed. Or maybe external circumstances?


----------



## Stillwater

I think my getting this Tattoo might have something to do with my forever single state.


----------



## Chief

Elsewhere1 said:


> @*Chief
> 
> Lol! Thanks for pointing out that most embarrassing typo>>> I may have had a few to drink before typing that post, lmao now!!
> *


No worries... I hope you know it was all in good fun. I'm a grammar Nazi and I don't deny it. I'm always embarrassed when I make a spelling error or grammar error, especially knowing how carefully I scrutinize others. If nothing else, it oughta teach ya' not to drink and post! :wink:


----------



## Rainbow

Marino said:


> You need a shave and a haircut. Your dirty laundry is more like a mildew-laced pile of odorous rags, so you wear your t-shirt inside out. There is leftover food on your desk from last week. What’s not to love? Look around, then look at yourself in the mirror. Are you a slob? Chicks don’t really dig slobs.


 LOL'd.

But I must say... I hate that I always fall for the boys that are in love with themselves... and the ones who think they're so awesome and borderline Gods on earth. F*cking annoying. UGH!


----------



## Rainbow

Stillwater said:


> I think my getting this Tattoo might have something to do with my forever single state.


You're kidding. -__-


----------



## Rainbow

Jorge said:


> Here's one that hasn't been mentioned, and unfortunately, SHOULD be included.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> *YOU ARE UGLY
> 
> *You were expecting this not to show up so you would get some self esteem about being average-looking? Just look around! Who is getting the dates? Who is making out with random strangers at every party? Who bounce out of serious relationships with more easiness? BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE.
> 
> We live in a predominantly shallow society, especially if you live in the U.S.. Do you really think that a girl will be able to overlook those glasses that look like they were made out of the bottom of a coke bottle? Most won't. Do you think many girls will want to walk by your side, when you are so fat you are taking 90% of the sidewalk?
> 
> Face it. Looks matter. Girls will have a harder time rejecting someone who looks like Johnny Depp, that someone who looks like he just got out of the world of warcraft convention. Us guys are worse than that, I am actually willing to say that men are more shallow than women. That STILL doesn't away the fact that many women are, and that an attractive look shows character and power.
> 
> I am not saying, in any way, that if you don't look like Brad Pitt, you are fucked. I am just saying, lose the comic book nerd beard, stop using those dreadful videogame t-shirts, and pleeeeease get a freaking haircut.
> 
> You don't like the rules of the game? Then stop trying to be in it.
> 
> Do I agree with this? No... I am completely depressed that it is such a standard in modern society. I am not shallow, I really value knowledge, I really value creativity, independence... and if you really are all of those things, that's good, but at least try to not turn people away from with the first impression you give!


90% of the sidewalk. lawl.


----------



## Thinkist

My problem: I'm seeking a once-and-for-all relationship. Chances are, I'm far from alone.


----------



## Oleas

Is it wrong that I could relate to many more things in that list than in the women's one?


----------



## Macrosapien

I typically don't go out too much as far as clubs and stuff go. not my thing and I don't like to approach women in that way -- I don't like the idea of being intrusive. I also don't really care. I did met someone I really really really liked and interacted with her romantically a lot, but then she got kinda weird and it got me confused. not confused any longer. things like this happens and it makes you like.. not care about it anymore and just focus on your own stuff you want in life.


----------



## vt1099ace

i don't trust 
of all things..letting go of that last bit of self preservation instinct has proven too hard...especially when doing so has cost me so much in the past, it just gets harder and harder as time goes by.


----------



## Thomas D M Thompson

reason 21:

Hookers are easier and cost less.


----------



## Feral sheep

not sure, clueless maybe?


----------



## celebration

women. you're nice to them, then they treat you like a pussy bitch. I'd say that's a problem with women, not the guys problem. after you're repeatedly treated like a doormat pussy bitch ive found it feels right to treat the girl like the hostile primitive animal that they are, and eventually they become completely fucking worthless to you, it is then that the women flirts and basically gives off the vibe that she wants to sleep with you. disgusting. don't judge my character negatively because I am a friendly person who is interested in your personality. the reason i am single is because i cant find a women who doesn't resemble an animal trying to survive and also the fact that im not sexually aroused by men. well there's another pathetic rant for everyone to read.


----------



## celebration

hahaa dont trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die


----------



## celebration

/////// yep


----------



## wisdom

Dating Market Value Test For Men « Chateau Heartiste


----------



## grayjay103

Control Freak, yes, Pervert, perhaps. 



 
Really though, I'm just too picky. I've swung towards desperation at times in my life, and gotten with a girl no problem, but then I freaked out when I realized I didn't really care about her. So for the past two years, I've been able to keep desperation mostly in check, save one instance.

In sum, I'd really blame it on my INTP-ness. Hey, I should be allowed to do that. Otherwise, I have no problems with commitment whatsoever, unless it's with a person I'm not honestly attracted too (physically and/or mentally). Honesty is the most important thing to me in a relationship, and if I don't feel I can be honest with a person, I shouldn't be dating them.

Time to go over and check the girls' list -- out of curiousity.


----------



## GoodOldDreamer

So many contradictions in that list in the OP. Too funny. Might as well have said "You're not perfect and just right in every way." P


----------



## KittyKraz13

GoodOldDreamer said:


> So many contradictions in that list in the OP. Too funny. Might as well have said "You're not perfect and just right in every way." P


There really is. You can't be broke, but you better not be a workaholic either. Don't be shy, but don't be in love with yourself either. Don't be boring, but you better not cross the fine line into obnoxiousness. And God forbid you be a nice guy.

Good luck men.


----------



## Aqualung

One thing I learned over the years; if you're a middleborn, male INFP Type 4 & live in Texas, you're going to stay single until you move away. Or win the lottery. There may be other places with similar limits, check the assimilation factor. Could be the culture.


----------



## Cover3

KittyKraz13 said:


> There really is. You can't be broke, but you better not be a workaholic either. Don't be shy, but don't be in love with yourself either. Don't be boring, but you better not cross the fine line into obnoxiousness. And God forbid you be a nice guy.
> 
> Good luck men.


 awesomeness put into words.

word'


----------



## Stufreddy

* You're Shallow*
Maybe a little, I have standards, so what. Every woman with confidence has them as well. Hence this list.

* You're Too Independent*
Yeah that's probably true, I've never thought of it as a flaw before. But that's the one thing she'll have to deal with.


*You're Afraid of Commitment*
Nope, unless it's crazy commitment.


*You're a Slob*
I'm not a slob, I'm messy, but I'm not dealing with leftover food and body fluids here. 


* You're a Douchebag*
That's something I'm not..so long as we're thinking about the article's definition of douchebag.

*You're Addicted to Gaming*
Not anymore.

* You're Desperate*
No, I'd probably say I'm more apathetic on the outside with a hopeful center.

*You're the Nice Guy*
I don't tolerate bullshit, so no I'm not going to act friendly if their being fucking irrational.

* You're a Control Freak*
I think I have been in the past..I wonder if I would be today.

*You're too Shy*
Yeah, I think my problem is that I'm not used to communicating with spoken words. If I had the ability to think in that way I'd totally go for it. But then again that means overcoming that wall so that I can practice develop that skill.

*You're Selfish*
Yeah, you've got me. I'm really self centered.

* You're Broke*
Three in a row.

*Your Friends Are Assholes*
I don't have any friends. A lot of them were assholes though.

*You're in Love with Yourself*
Well if I don't love me, who else will?

* You're a Workaholic*
Hahahahahaha

*You're a Pervert*
Yeah, but a tactful one.

*You're in Love with Your Ex*
Nah, I never loved her.

* You're Boring*
I think I'm interesting. Maybe not in the appealing to THEIR interests kind of way. 

*You're Obnoxious*
Possibly, although I'm quiet so not in an ear bleeding way.

*You're a Liar*
I'm a pretty honest person.


I feel really rebellious to the creator of the list though...Maybe because I'm perfectly fine being single.


----------



## alvinfromwaterloo

An interesting idea from reddit's forever alone crowd on why some people are forever single:

The idea was that the typical forever alone person with above average IQ never really had to struggle with anything early in their life. They'd just get things while others struggled and would be praised on their accomplishments even if they didn't really prepare extensively or work that hard. Things just came naturally. If they couldn't do something successfully it was usually for a reason out of their control.

However when it comes to relationships it's unfortunately not like that (unless they're just really good looking). For these forever alone people there is an expectation that a relationship will also just come naturally to them, like a lot of other things have in their life. They could be waiting for the perfect intelligent beautiful person to come along, and then they'll say something witty (or something, they typically haven't thought this part through) and this person will just fall for them naturally. Of course, this rarely happens in real life. In fact, the first person most people date is never 'the one'.

Now the suggested way to fix this is easy. They just need to start trying and put effort into not being forever single. I have met a lot of forever alone people who are waiting for a significant other but I have rarely met a person who *actively seeks and works on acquiring a relationship* that has been forever alone.

*tl;dr:* 
The above average IQ forever alone person expects relationships to just happen. Why work at it or bother with it if just doesn't happen with no effort?

*tl;dr: Dwight Schrute:* 
False. You can still be yourself but improve your 'relationship XP'. You are required to be at least Level 3 in Relationships for most dungeons in this game of life.


----------



## SoundlessPaniK

wat


DISREGARD FEMALES; ACQUIRE AESTHETICS


----------



## Hruberen

alvinfromwaterloo said:


> An interesting idea from reddit's forever alone crowd on why some people are forever single:
> 
> The idea was that the typical forever alone person with above average IQ never really had to struggle with anything early in their life. They'd just get things while others struggled and would be praised on their accomplishments even if they didn't really prepare extensively or work that hard. Things just came naturally. If they couldn't do something successfully it was usually for a reason out of their control.
> 
> However when it comes to relationships it's unfortunately not like that (unless they're just really good looking). For these forever alone people there is an expectation that a relationship will also just come naturally to them, like a lot of other things have in their life. They could be waiting for the perfect intelligent beautiful person to come along, and then they'll say something witty (or something, they typically haven't thought this part through) and this person will just fall for them naturally. Of course, this rarely happens in real life. In fact, the first person most people date is never 'the one'.
> 
> Now the suggested way to fix this is easy. They just need to start trying and put effort into not being forever single. I have met a lot of forever alone people who are waiting for a significant other but I have rarely met a person who *actively seeks and works on acquiring a relationship* that has been forever alone.
> 
> *tl;dr:*
> The above average IQ forever alone person expects relationships to just happen. Why work at it or bother with it if just doesn't happen with no effort?
> 
> *tl;dr: Dwight Schrute:*
> False. You can still be yourself but improve your 'relationship XP'. You are required to be at least Level 3 in Relationships for most dungeons in this game of life.


I'm pretty sure you got this spot on


----------



## Pride49

I have my own Idea of who I would want to be with. Since most guys apparently only care about getting the girl. I know how stupid a woman is before I even get to know them. Mostly, I know anyones personality in a pinch. If I can predict their next sentence. They aren't worth my time. I am rude because I disagree with societies conditioning. I am independent BECAUSE I haven't found my 'Natasha' (I wrote in a book I'm writing the ideal woman for me, name Natasha.) I do like games, but I do lots of other things for free time. I am basically viewed as a run of the mill asshole. Only the things I am an asshole about, I back up with an argument and give credible sources to explain why I act that way. It is more amusing people have created things like "20 conditions for why you don't get a girl" because it is all a generalization of what all men act like. I agree it probably explains almost ev everyone. I would look for a woman that's an asshole, independent because she knows of society and everyones stupidity, As for the games, I could really care less. And if she's not a moron, she could care less about my addictions. I would imagine her to be agressive, and rude to just about everyone including myself as a fun ploy. That is what I expect. I have my expectations set. I'm not 'looking' for what I want from a woman. I am looking for the one that fits my description in my mind.


----------



## SJ1974

I don't have the time to write it all, it'd take for fucking ever.


----------



## Catenaccio

Marino said:


> There’s nothing wrong with being single, but at some point most people reach the point of wanting a relationship. If you reached that point a while back, but still haven’t had any luck, you might want to check this list to see if anything sounds familiar.
> 
> *You’re Shallow*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> If within a few seconds of meeting a woman you have already calculated an estimate of her weight and located any problem areas where cellulite might lurk on her body, you may hereby consider yourself *shallow*. No matter how hot she is, you’re inevitably going to find her flaws. You will likely remain single until you _get over yourself_.
> 
> *You’re Too Independent*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> Being a bachelor certainly has plenty of perks. You don’t have to wait that extra hour for her to get ready for an outing, and you generally come and go as you please. The thing is, at some point you may actually no longer want to be all alone, and you’re going to have to compromise. Give up a bit of your independence to avoid growing into a lonely old man.
> 
> *You’re Afraid of Commitment*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> Tying into your fierce sense of independence is your equally strong fear of commitment. On top of losing your freedom, you don’t want to get married, only to get divorced later and lose half of your stuff. The future is unpredictable, and you can bet that once you settle down, you’ll meet a woman who is hotter, smarter and more successful than the one you’re with. Oh, and she’s going to flirt with you, but too bad – you’re in a committed relationship. Knowing this, you have every right to fear commitment, but getting over that fear *is what men do*.
> 
> *You’re a Slob*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> You need a shave and a haircut. Your dirty laundry is more like a mildew-laced pile of odorous rags, so you wear your t-shirt inside out. There is leftover food on your desk from last week. What’s not to love? Look around, then look at yourself in the mirror. Are you a slob? _Chicks don’t really dig slobs_.
> 
> *You’re a Douchebag*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> Get your collar popped and layer on that spray-tan – let’s talk about why you’re still single. Could you be a douchebag? Some women actually like douchebags, but these ladies are generally not the type you’d take home to meet mom. If you want to meet a nice girl, you’re going to have to tone it down a notch. Or several.
> 
> *You’re Addicted to Gaming*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> If by some divine intervention, you actually manage to acquire a _girlfriend_ between day-long bouts of questing, you’re probably in for a let-down since she won’t be around long. You need to cut back, drastically, on your playing habits if you want to maintain a relationship. Just remember, your guild isn’t going to keep you warm at night.
> 
> *You’re Desperate*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> Desperation reeks. It’s a fact. Men who are desperate repel women. If you are initially cool enough to get a woman’s phone number, by no means should you ever call her more than twice without her returning your call. She may be busy when you call, but if you call repeatedly, you are ensuring that she will never call you back, and even worse, she’ll hope to never see you again.
> 
> *You’re the Nice Guy*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> You’re always helpful, polite, and kind – the type of guy every woman wants, right? Apparently not. Guys that are _too nice_ have a more difficult time moving out of the friend zone than guys who act like _complete dicks_. Some women even perceive excessive niceness as a weakness of character. You shouldn’t go full douchebag, but don’t be afraid to be a little hard, at times. It just lets her know you’re not a doormat.
> 
> *You’re a Control Freak*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> It’s your way, or the highway. There’s no room for compromise in your life. You like things the way you like them, and as long as everything goes according to your plan everything is cool. If you throw a temper tantrum the moment something is out of your control, you may need to lighten up a little.
> 
> *You’re Too Shy*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> 
> There comes a time in your life when you have to either man up and deal with your insecurities or face the fact that you’re going to die alone. If you don’t have any confidence when approaching women, enlist some friends to help you out. You may need to serve as a wingman for a while, but pay attention to what the pilot is doing. Observe him and learn how the game is played. And remember this: *Alcohol is your friend*.
> 
> *You’re Selfish*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> Did you fail “Sharing” in kindergarten? If you only ever think of yourself, get used to it because you’re the only person you’ll have to consider as you’ll be single for a while. If you can bring yourself to be a little less self-absorbed and a little more considerate, you may have a shot at a relationship. Try putting others before yourself a little more often.
> 
> *You’re Broke*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> If you’re broke all the time, how can you expect to maintain a relationship? You don’t have to buy a girl expensive gifts, but she will like to go out from time to time. If you’re tired of being single, you’ll have to work some dating funds into your budget.
> 
> *Your Friends Are Assholes*
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> It’s true, you’re judged by the company you keep. If you hang out with jerks, you’re likely a jerk too. Even if you’re not, you can’t stop your friends from acting like assholes and ruining any relationship you might have. Get some better friends.
> 
> *You’re In Love With Yourself*
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> You’re wonderful and perfect. You don’t need a relationship because everything you do, say and have is so delightful there is really no void to fill. It must be great to be you.
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> *You’re a Workaholic*
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> Being career and goal-oriented isn’t a flaw, but it may take away relationship opportunities. If you’re too busy to have any kind of social life outside of work, you’re already married – _to your job_.
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> *You’re a Pervert*
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> We all think about sex – a lot. However, if you fail to disengage your eyes and mouth from your perverted thoughts you will repulse women. If you are looking for a relationship, you will need to learn this skill. It’s also a good idea to learn how to clear your cache and browser history.
> 
> *You’re In Love With Your Ex*
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> Your relationships may never work out if you’re still hung up on the one that got away. It’s best to move forward and let it go, especially if you’re looking for something new. No woman wants to live in the shadow of your ex. It’s also pathetic, so get over it.
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> *You’re Boring*
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> What were you saying? Sorry, I fell asleep. You’re boring. Nobody wants to listen to you tell the same unfunny stories over and over. We’re sure your cat is awesome, but come on. Be interesting if you’re going to talk so much, otherwise just shut up and work the mysterious angle instead.
> 
> *You’re Obnoxious*
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> You always interrupt when people are speaking, usually to interject a random rude comment. You’re loud and you’re the only person who thinks you’re funny. You’re like nails on a chalkboard to most women, so _grow up_ and try listening to people for once.
> 
> *You’re a Liar*
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> Telling her that her ass doesn’t look big in those jeans isn’t a lie, it’s self-preservation. Telling her you were at church while you were at the racetrack is a lie. You only have to get caught in one big one to spoil something that could have been nice. Have the balls to tell the truth, _just don’t be brutal about it_.


Shallow, broke, desperate and workaholic* right here!

Actually I am not desperate at first so I can start seeing a girl easily, but I go mad if she starts to distance herself from me.  I need to learn to stay calm and not fall for that game.

*(so hopefully I won't be broke long at least, lol)


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## Catenaccio

alvinfromwaterloo said:


> An interesting idea from reddit's forever alone crowd on why some people are forever single:
> 
> The idea was that the typical forever alone person with above average IQ never really had to struggle with anything early in their life. They'd just get things while others struggled and would be praised on their accomplishments even if they didn't really prepare extensively or work that hard. Things just came naturally. If they couldn't do something successfully it was usually for a reason out of their control.
> 
> However when it comes to relationships it's unfortunately not like that (unless they're just really good looking). For these forever alone people there is an expectation that a relationship will also just come naturally to them, like a lot of other things have in their life. They could be waiting for the perfect intelligent beautiful person to come along, and then they'll say something witty (or something, they typically haven't thought this part through) and this person will just fall for them naturally. Of course, this rarely happens in real life. In fact, the first person most people date is never 'the one'.
> 
> Now the suggested way to fix this is easy. They just need to start trying and put effort into not being forever single. I have met a lot of forever alone people who are waiting for a significant other but I have rarely met a person who *actively seeks and works on acquiring a relationship* that has been forever alone.
> 
> *tl;dr:*
> The above average IQ forever alone person expects relationships to just happen. Why work at it or bother with it if just doesn't happen with no effort?
> 
> *tl;dr: Dwight Schrute:*
> False. You can still be yourself but improve your 'relationship XP'. You are required to be at least Level 3 in Relationships for most dungeons in this game of life.


Yes this makes sense. I know guys like that, they are ok looking, quite cool, intelligent, sophisticated, etc., but they never get a woman because they never really try, even if she makes it very obvious she is open to them.

Also I am not talking about shy people, that is different issue I believe.


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## Chief

Pride49 said:


> I have my own Idea of who I would want to be with. Since most guys apparently only care about getting the girl. I know how stupid a woman is before I even get to know them. Mostly, I know anyones personality in a pinch. If I can predict their next sentence. They aren't worth my time. I am rude because I disagree with societies conditioning. I am independent BECAUSE I haven't found my 'Natasha' (I wrote in a book I'm writing the ideal woman for me, name Natasha.) I do like games, but I do lots of other things for free time. I am basically viewed as a run of the mill asshole. Only the things I am an asshole about, I back up with an argument and give credible sources to explain why I act that way. It is more amusing people have created things like "20 conditions for why you don't get a girl" because it is all a generalization of what all men act like. I agree it probably explains almost ev everyone. I would look for a woman that's an asshole, independent because she knows of society and everyones stupidity, As for the games,* I could really care less*. And if she's not a moron, *she could care less* about my addictions. I would imagine her to be agressive, and rude to just about everyone including myself as a fun ploy. That is what I expect. I have my expectations set. I'm not 'looking' for what I want from a woman. I am looking for the one that fits my description in my mind.


I always find it hysterical when people go on a rant about how intelligent they are and how stupid others are, then make more than one of the standard "you're really not as smart as you think you are if you say...." type statements. In this case I've highlighted the one he used twice. I'm reasonably certain he meant "couldn't care less," unless, of course, he was purposely trying to ply a double negative for comic relief. As the erudite know, when you *can* care less, then you *do* care some. It's only when you *couldn't *care less you've reached the point of total apathy. <sigh> Ahhhhh, egos... As far as I'm concerned, the more I learn, the more I know, and the more I know, the more I know I don't know.


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## Impermanence

Well according to this list, looks like most of us will be single forever. Might as well kick back in a lawn chair with an ice cold beer and enjoy being single.


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## Pride49

Chief said:


> I always find it hysterical when people go on a rant about how intelligent they are and how stupid others are, then make more than one of the standard "you're really not as smart as you think you are if you say...." type statements. In this case I've highlighted the one he used twice. I'm reasonably certain he meant "couldn't care less," unless, of course, he was purposely trying to ply a double negative for comic relief. As the erudite know, when you *can* care less, then you *do* care some. It's only when you *couldn't *care less you've reached the point of total apathy. <sigh> Ahhhhh, egos... As far as I'm concerned, the more I learn, the more I know, and the more I know, the more I know I don't know.


Aha! Someone quoted my post. I don't see the double negatives in there. Both of those sentences were different subjects altogether. Perhaps it's because I posted the "She could't care less" at the beginning of the sentence making you think the two were somehow connected. The she's not a moron sentence. Meant, if she's smart, then she shouldn't care about someones addictions. I don't see the double negative. I do have an incredible ego, which is why I love writing about myself and making myself seem smarter. I do like to think I look outside of the box while everyone else is a sheep on a continuous mobius strip. You are defensive too about me bashing those with traditional methods of 'getting' women. I couldn't resist not replying.(Ha! double negative) You may have found it ironic that I speak of predictability as a bad thing and then I use the same sentence twice. Well, I sort of meant that paragraph to mean that in the background at least. wait...I just figured out what you were saying. Warning! I am about to blame my stupidity on something! Well, it is 5.00 in the morning. But anywho. couldn't the amount you don't care about something stretch to infinity? The actions could at least. So, I can care less, by making actions that make others believe me or.....whatever...Couldn't really care less sounds less fluent to say. Yes, I probaby spelled that wrong. But I instinctively wrote it like I would say it without interruptions. You basically said I was stupid or discredited me because of my own personal turn of words. Good job. And I hope one day. When you do see another post like mine you will continue to think they're morons. After all. No one couldn't possibly be trying to make it a statement. Man this was a long post. That last sentence of yours was a little too common of knowledge for me.


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## MyName

I suggest we add a new entry to this list

#21-You insist on quoting entire massive OP's that are full of pictures when you only want to reply to one or two parts of it. It cloggs up the page and is seriously annoying. Nobody likes that.


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## refugee

I'm like 20% of all of the above. No wonder I'm single. Sheeeeeit.


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## Rakshasa

Wasn't going to comment, then I noticed "Too Independent." 
You're killing me, humanity. You're really killing me.


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## Giga Blender

Why isn't this thread called 20 Areas That Everyone Alive Has Some Variety Of Which May or May Not Have An Effect On Your Relationships? Probably too wordy and not nearly as condescending, I guess.


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## Rinori

Its true, every guy has some level of the above in them so basically we're doomed to a life of singleness. @ *OCPD ISTJ* Your avatar made me laugh so loud at work.


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## Nephilim

Twenty? That's too much! But ok, I'll try...

1. I don't really want a girlfriend. At least right now.
2. I'm too picky. I've set somewhat high standards and do not want to lower them.
3. I enjoy solitude and quickly start to feel exhausted if there is even a single person near me.
4. I do not want more responsibility than I have now.
5. I'm too shy around girls.
6. A lot of girls have showed me their interest in me openly but I did not know what to do next and tried to withdraw. Every time it was pretty awkward.
7. I've always had hard time with buying gifts. It's not about money but about not knowing what to choose.
8. I don't know why but I feel bad when someone cares for me. It's like that I feel I don't deserve it.
9. Escapism. I would rather watch a movie or play an rpg with a love story than put efforts into real relationships.
10. Having a gf means getting out of home more often. Sounds creepy.
11. Fictional love stories set high expectations of love for me which don't match reality.
12. I'm fine with escapism. My vivid imagination helps me here.

I guess that is all.


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## xxxlovefactorxxx

The desperate picture definitely had me laughing!


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## Coziene

I don't know about anyone else, but when I look through these, and really think about it, my mind seems to conjure up the following: 
So you need to be a _man_ in accordance with society, which means that I actually have to care about how society perceives me. In becoming a _man_ and to get into a relationship, I have to give up the things I value most such as my independence and my limited resources of time and money, so that I can somehow find pleasure in another person who may or may not leave me. The only justifiable behavior for ever investing in something so risky (aka relationship) is that you can have the carnal pleasures of the flesh, and some emotional attachment (both of which I devalue or at least try to not to succumb to).
Now, if I do live with this person until my death bed, I will die alone regardless, because we are born into this world alone, and we will leave this world alone (aka no one shares my mind).
So basically, the _one real thing_ that stops me from having a relationship is my _mind_, which I can't really change (at least without serious adverse effects). So in order for me to have a relationship I need to be accepting of society and its stupid shallow perceptions, I need to be more assertive and build more self-confidence, I need to care about emotions and sex, and I need to get rid of the "big picture" of the universe (this ties in with born alone, die alone). 
So I need a brain transplant. 
And people wonder why I never find a girl. It is all so simple!

I wonder who else ever thinks on this level...


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## Shinji Mimura

Why I'm single: I'm still in college.

on a more serious note, once I graduate from college I'm moving to South Korea. That's not always the best thing to hear when you meet a guy you're interested in.


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## ForsakenMe

I like how nearly everybody trashes MY list, but when I read this list, it says that men should basically GIVE UP a loved hobby (video games) just to please his woman?

I'm sorry, but what the hell? You're all sitting there laughing that men need to be 100% perfect, but God forbid anybody tells a woman to buck up and give up some of her harmful behavior and habits just to get a guy. I can see it now...
_
Man: I love you even though you're a heroin addict, still in love with your ex-husband, and clings to me more than my own dog does!  And I don't mind that you go out and drink yourself silly with friends every night, or the fact that you cry yourself to sleep because of your depression, and I'm supposed to be the one who has to take all of that and more because that's what GOOD boyfriends do!

Woman: Awww I love you too!

Man: By the way, I'm gonna go and play World of Warcraft, so I'll call you--

Woman: OMG WHAT THE HELL WHY ARE YOU STILL PLAYING THAT VIDEO GAME YOU NEED TO GROW UP, YOU LOSER!!_


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## skycloud86

ForsakenMe said:


> I like how nearly everybody trashes MY list, but when I read this list, it says that men should basically GIVE UP a loved hobby (video games) just to please his woman?


Actually, if you read that one correctly, it is talking about addiction to video games. Many women enjoy video games, and I doubt most women would be bothered about their male partners playing video games, but what that item is talking about is the obsessive, the gamer who plays for most of the day and is actually addicted to playing that game. That is very different from playing video games like a regular person and being able to stop playing to do other things.

Also, who said that men need to be 100% perfect? If anything, it's women who "have" to be 100% perfect in most societies, whilst men get away with being a bit fatter, a bit untidier, a bit quiet/louder and so on.


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## Razare

I'm a Boring, Slob, Control-Freak, Pervert, who happens to be broke! 

At least now, I know why I'm single... lolz


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## Joseph

Too edgy, feminine, and anti-social right now. It didn't stop me previously from dating, but as I get older I need to make long lasting friendships to actually meet new girls, and abandon the pretty boy look. Also focus on my career more than my art. I need to step up my flirting tactics, but it's been a struggle when I'm lolintroverted.


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## android654

ForsakenMe said:


> I like how nearly everybody trashes MY list, but when I read this list, it says that men should basically GIVE UP a loved hobby (video games) just to please his woman?
> 
> I'm sorry, but what the hell? You're all sitting there laughing that men need to be 100% perfect, but God forbid anybody tells a woman to buck up and give up some of her harmful behavior and habits just to get a guy. I can see it now...
> _
> Man: I love you even though you're a heroin addict, still in love with your ex-husband, and clings to me more than my own dog does!  And I don't mind that you go out and drink yourself silly with friends every night, or the fact that you cry yourself to sleep because of your depression, and I'm supposed to be the one who has to take all of that and more because that's what GOOD boyfriends do!
> 
> Woman: Awww I love you too!
> 
> Man: By the way, I'm gonna go and play World of Warcraft, so I'll call you--
> 
> Woman: OMG WHAT THE HELL WHY ARE YOU STILL PLAYING THAT VIDEO GAME YOU NEED TO GROW UP, YOU LOSER!!_



Genius!

To those of you taking the list seriously, lighten up. It's not meant to be taken seriously. Then again, if you do take offense to it, there's probably a reason why.


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## User

I would note douchebaggery as a benefit. Why? -is a mystery though. Maybe just a strange demographics I'm in, eh?


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## Playful Proxy

What if you are a shy pervert? Then the two can balance one another out so it is more like flirting...right?


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## jose cajar

i like this tread
ok here is why i am single in a non personality type of way:

im a shy person to outsiders
i am not ripped (not out of shape but i am skinny and tall)
txting is not my forte
when it comes to relationships ive been hurt so i take a little precaution to entering a relationship
i dont like one night stands
i am a hopeless romantic
my friend is the most attractive guy you will meet. she will give him her number and she will giggle (not exactly physical attraction)

here is why i am single in a personality kind of way:
4 letters INFJ. i dont take the lead


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## ImminentThunder

Lol. This was depressing. Mildly funny though. I understand it was meant to be a joke, but still, ouch. 

For me it's mainly the shyness getting in the way. People aren't attracted to people that don't talk. I don't have low self confidence either, _except_ for in my social skills. -_- Most of the others did not apply to me. 

I wouldn't worry about it too much if you're "still single," even though it's hard. I've never been in a relationship or kissed a girl before, mainly due to the above mentioned shyness. Which is depressing as I'm a romantic who wants that more than anything. I've gotten severely depressed over it many times. But I haven't given up yet. True love will find you; you just have to keep looking for it.


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## Adnan Syed

Or you're just plain ugly <----- I pretty much say that to myself


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## Mr. Meepers

> You’re Shallow
> If within a few seconds of meeting a woman you have already calculated an estimate of her weight and located any problem areas where cellulite might lurk on her body, you may hereby consider yourself shallow. No matter how hot she is, you’re inevitably going to find her flaws. You will likely remain single until you get over yourself.


Wow, I can calculate all that in seconds?!?!?! ... Why am I not not leading quantum surgeon that entangles an "unattractive" woman with an "attractive" one XD

I am also no more than a foot deep at any part of me while lying down (only true when I am not aroused :wink::shocked: ... which is never :tongue





> You’re Too Independent
> Being a bachelor certainly has plenty of perks. You don’t have to wait that extra hour for her to get ready for an outing, and you generally come and go as you please. The thing is, at some point you may actually no longer want to be all alone, and you’re going to have to compromise. Give up a bit of your independence to avoid growing into a lonely old man.


I don't want to be alone now XD




> You’re Afraid of Commitment
> Tying into your fierce sense of independence is your equally strong fear of commitment. On top of losing your freedom, you don’t want to get married, only to get divorced later and lose half of your stuff. The future is unpredictable, and you can bet that once you settle down, you’ll meet a woman who is hotter, smarter and more successful than the one you’re with. Oh, and she’s going to flirt with you, but too bad – you’re in a committed relationship. Knowing this, you have every right to fear commitment, but getting over that fear is what men do.


Aren't ALL women hotter, smarter and more successful than the one I'm with .... BECAUSE THEY ARE REAL!?!?!?!?


> You’re a Slob
> You need a shave and a haircut. Your dirty laundry is more like a mildew-laced pile of odorous rags, so you wear your t-shirt inside out. There is leftover food on your desk from last week. What’s not to love? Look around, then look at yourself in the mirror. Are you a slob? Chicks don’t really dig slobs.


lol ... Well sometimes I need a shave and a haircut (honest) ... but my hair is never that bad, and I shave more often when I want to meet a woman lol .... although, I do have a terrible time with not dropping food on myself when I am really worried about dropping food on myself :laughing:





> You’re a Douchebag
> Get your collar popped and layer on that spray-tan – let’s talk about why you’re still single. Could you be a douchebag? Some women actually like douchebags, but these ladies are generally not the type you’d take home to meet mom. If you want to meet a nice girl, you’re going to have to tone it down a notch. Or several.


I think douchebags get more action than I do (no matter what you mean by the word "douchbag" :shocked





> You’re Addicted to Gaming
> If by some divine intervention, you actually manage to acquire a girlfriend between day-long bouts of questing, you’re probably in for a let-down since she won’t be around long. You need to cut back, drastically, on your playing habits if you want to maintain a relationship. Just remember, your guild isn’t going to keep you warm at night.


I like games from time to time ... unless you mean addicted to love games :wink: because no one loves me enough to play those games :tongue:




> You’re Desperate
> Desperation reeks. It’s a fact. Men who are desperate repel women. If you are initially cool enough to get a woman’s phone number, by no means should you ever call her more than twice without her returning your call. She may be busy when you call, but if you call repeatedly, you are ensuring that she will never call you back, and even worse, she’ll hope to never see you again.


I'm more likely not to call :shocked: ... out of fear of sounding desperate and not wanting to bother people (the real reason I am single lol)




> You’re the Nice Guy
> You’re always helpful, polite, and kind – the type of guy every woman wants, right? Apparently not. Guys that are too nice have a more difficult time moving out of the friend zone than guys who act like complete dicks. Some women even perceive excessive niceness as a weakness of character. You shouldn’t go full douchebag, but don’t be afraid to be a little hard, at times. It just lets her know you’re not a doormat.


Actually, I am pretty nice, but my niceness has actually helped me get dates .... and, although I am very lenient and will probably let people not be very nice to me, I never let someone use me as a doormat (I am not that kinky :tongue: ... assuming we are talking about the guys that get pleasure out of women literally standing on them :tongue - I have been know to yell from time to time :shocked: ... Or, at the very least, rise my voice lol




> You’re a Control Freak
> It’s your way, or the highway. There’s no room for compromise in your life. You like things the way you like them, and as long as everything goes according to your plan everything is cool. If you throw a temper tantrum the moment something is out of your control, you may need to lighten up a little.


NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! ... I have known some really bad control freaks in my life who have hurt all the people who loved them greatly, including myself ... and I promised myself to NEVER be like them!!!

I will not be a control freak and there is no room for compromise :tongue: ... I'm a control freak about becoming a control freak :tongue: ... I'm meta-freaky ... and a contradiction :tongue:





> You’re Too Shy
> There comes a time in your life when you have to either man up and deal with your insecurities or face the fact that you’re going to die alone. If you don’t have any confidence when approaching women, enlist some friends to help you out. You may need to serve as a wingman for a while, but pay attention to what the pilot is doing. Observe him and learn how the game is played. And remember this: Alcohol is your friend.


Okay, I am shy ... and that is part of my problem ... but no ... I don't need other guys judging my "game" and style of flirting ... I flirt for fun, not to get laid (although I won't complain if it leads to that XD //jk) ... and if alcohol was my friend, I would be able to trust it enough to not leave me tied up, naked to a hotel bedroom waiting for the maid to walk in with no money to tip her (sorry, that never happened to me)

Seriously, flirting should be fun and more of a private conversation ... I don't want a bunch of friends staring at me from a distance ... I would rather confront my shyness with the woman XD

I usually date friends or friends of friends anyways, so that has never really been an issue for me




> You’re Selfish
> Did you fail “Sharing” in kindergarten? If you only ever think of yourself, get used to it because you’re the only person you’ll have to consider as you’ll be single for a while. If you can bring yourself to be a little less self-absorbed and a little more considerate, you may have a shot at a relationship. Try putting others before yourself a little more often.


I tried putting others before myself, but they always get in the way XD //jk ... And they don't let you walk around them XD //jk




> You’re Broke
> If you’re broke all the time, how can you expect to maintain a relationship? You don’t have to buy a girl expensive gifts, but she will like to go out from time to time. If you’re tired of being single, you’ll have to work some dating funds into your budget.


True story .... although, at my age, people seem to be okay if you can be pretty resourcefulness and find things to do cheaply (yay free parks and very high up Broadway seats XD)




> Your Friends Are Assholes
> It’s true, you’re judged by the company you keep. If you hang out with jerks, you’re likely a jerk too. Even if you’re not, you can’t stop your friends from acting like assholes and ruining any relationship you might have. Get some better friends.


I tried to get better friends, but the old ones keep coming back and scaring the new ones away :tongue:
No, I have good friends lol


... No, wait ... all my friend are imaginary 



> You’re In Love With Yourself
> You’re wonderful and perfect. You don’t need a relationship because everything you do, say and have is so delightful there is really no void to fill. It must be great to be you.


Damn right it is ... Finally, someone realizes the truth  ... Now why can't everyone else realize this

I also love my penis to (why I'm single)
_I have a penis. I touch it everyday.
When it is hard and ready, then penis I shall play.
Oh Penis, Penis, Penis
I touch you everyday
__Oh Penis, Penis, Penis_
_Now penis I shall play_
Now, I know why I am single ... and why I will be single for life :tongue:






> You’re a Workaholic
> Being career and goal-oriented isn’t a flaw, but it may take away relationship opportunities. If you’re too busy to have any kind of social life outside of work, you’re already married – to your job.


Really?!?!?!?! ... No, I can't even pretend to be this lol ... I required to many cuddles to be a workaholic





> You’re a Pervert
> We all think about sex – a lot. However, if you fail to disengage your eyes and mouth from your perverted thoughts you will repulse women. If you are looking for a relationship, you will need to learn this skill. It’s also a good idea to learn how to clear your cache and browser history.


Well, duh ... of course I am a pervert ... that is why I am so lovable ^__^ .... and clear my cache and browser history??? ... but how else will I find those awesome sites again (bookmarks ^__^ )





> You’re In Love With Your Ex
> Your relationships may never work out if you’re still hung up on the one that got away. It’s best to move forward and let it go, especially if you’re looking for something new. No woman wants to live in the shadow of your ex. It’s also pathetic, so get over it.


I think for a time, this way true. ... she was a pain in the butt, and she was too scared of the world it seemed like, but I loved her ... the real reason I was single for some time was because I did not really bother to actually try and put myself out there ... and I think this may have been part of the reason ... another part was that most of the people I see are single males and I was not really trying to meet new people




> You’re Boring
> What were you saying? Sorry, I fell asleep. You’re boring. Nobody wants to listen to you tell the same unfunny stories over and over. We’re sure your cat is awesome, but come on. Be interesting if you’re going to talk so much, otherwise just shut up and work the mysterious angle instead.


Yeah, I probably am lol ... I'm also forgetful too lol (did I tell you about _____ ... yes, you did for the 20th time already ... really? I don't remember telling you ... yes I can even tell you the story) ....... I also don't think people always like what I like to talk/think about lol ... So, I am a boring person ... The things that take me out of my bordum are the things that bore other people lol XD

Boring Joke: You know who is boring? The physicist Niels Bohr .... get it  ... he was such a "Bohr"  ... that was bad lol





> You’re Obnoxious
> You always interrupt when people are speaking, usually to interject a random rude comment. You’re loud and you’re the only person who thinks you’re funny. You’re like nails on a chalkboard to most women, so grow up and try listening to people for once.


I might be the only person who thinks I am funny lol ... but I am definitely not loud ... except when I am posting silently on PerC ... then my posts are LOUD!!!! lol 



> You’re a LiarTelling her that her ass doesn’t look big in those jeans isn’t a lie, it’s self-preservation. Telling her you were at church while you were at the racetrack is a lie. You only have to get caught in one big one to spoil something that could have been nice. Have the balls to tell the truth, just don’t be brutal about it.


Oh the telling her that she does not look fat, does not count as a lie ... Okay, good ... I almost thought many of my friendships were based on lies  //jk (I'm really mean at times lol)

_W: Honey, Where did you go to day?
M: Well, I was going to tell you that I was golfing with the guys, but I don't want our relationship to be based on lies ... I was out planning your surprise party ... FOILED SURPRISE_ 

 ... Perhaps, sometimes it is okay to lie 

_W: What did you do today?
M: I did not just gamble our house and home away!!! ... Don't worry about the strange men in the house, talking away all our stuff_

But don't lie all the time ... and let your long term significant other participate in all the "big financial decisions"





How come there is no being physically unattractive reason lol ... because that might be me lol


----------



## Playful Proxy

I have come to a realization:


----------



## kevman

My philosophy is this:
knowledge = power
power = confidence
confidence = getting ladies

That's a part of the reason why I am a psychology junkie, as the more I know about women, the better I am with them. For anyone that is still single, I recommend learning as much as you can about psychology. This forum is a great place. I also just found out about Project Evolove, which is a site that specifically lays out the psychology for relationships and compatibility.


----------



## Master Mind

kevman said:


> My philosophy is this:
> knowledge = power
> power = confidence
> confidence = getting ladies
> 
> That's a part of the reason why I am a psychology junkie, as the more I know about women, the better I am with them. For anyone that is still single, I recommend learning as much as you can about psychology. This forum is a great place. I also just found out about Project Evolove, which is a site that specifically lays out the psychology for relationships and compatibility.


I got my degree in psychology, though because human behavior in general fascinates me, not to use it to better be able to pick up women. Though I suppose it could be used for that purpose.


----------



## petite libellule

@kevman

just remember, getting the girl and KEEPING the girl are Two WHOLE Entirely Different Ballgames :wink:


----------



## Joseph

Marino said:


> *You’re Shallow*
> 
> Source
> If within a few seconds of meeting a woman you have already calculated an estimate of her weight and located any problem areas where cellulite might lurk on her body, you may hereby consider yourself *shallow*. No matter how hot she is, you’re inevitably going to find her flaws. You will likely remain single until you _get over yourself_.


Yeah sort of but everyone is. Check.



> *You’re Too Independent*
> 
> Source
> Being a bachelor certainly has plenty of perks. You don’t have to wait that extra hour for her to get ready for an outing, and you generally come and go as you please. The thing is, at some point you may actually no longer want to be all alone, and you’re going to have to compromise. Give up a bit of your independence to avoid growing into a lonely old man.


I guess? Independent almost sounds like a compliment. Shut-in sounds better. Check.



> *You’re Afraid of Commitment*
> 
> Source
> Tying into your fierce sense of independence is your equally strong fear of commitment. On top of losing your freedom, you don’t want to get married, only to get divorced later and lose half of your stuff. The future is unpredictable, and you can bet that once you settle down, you’ll meet a woman who is hotter, smarter and more successful than the one you’re with. Oh, and she’s going to flirt with you, but too bad – you’re in a committed relationship. Knowing this, you have every right to fear commitment, but getting over that fear *is what men do*.


This doesn't really factor into relationships until you are 24+. At least for me. 



> *You’re a Slob*
> 
> Source
> You need a shave and a haircut. Your dirty laundry is more like a mildew-laced pile of odorous rags, so you wear your t-shirt inside out. There is leftover food on your desk from last week. What’s not to love? Look around, then look at yourself in the mirror. Are you a slob? _Chicks don’t really dig slobs_.


Nope.



> *You’re a Douchebag*
> 
> Source
> Get your collar popped and layer on that spray-tan – let’s talk about why you’re still single. Could you be a douchebag? Some women actually like douchebags, but these ladies are generally not the type you’d take home to meet mom. If you want to meet a nice girl, you’re going to have to tone it down a notch. Or several.


Nope. I can be harsh sometimes, but I do not fit this description. 



> *You’re Addicted to Gaming*
> 
> Source
> If by some divine intervention, you actually manage to acquire a _girlfriend_ between day-long bouts of questing, you’re probably in for a let-down since she won’t be around long. You need to cut back, drastically, on your playing habits if you want to maintain a relationship. Just remember, your guild isn’t going to keep you warm at night.


I play no video games. I program a bit, for my major. 



> *You’re Desperate*
> 
> Source
> Desperation reeks. It’s a fact. Men who are desperate repel women. If you are initially cool enough to get a woman’s phone number, by no means should you ever call her more than twice without her returning your call. She may be busy when you call, but if you call repeatedly, you are ensuring that she will never call you back, and even worse, she’ll hope to never see you again.


I avoid seeking out women in this fashion. 



> *You’re the Nice Guy*
> 
> Source
> You’re always helpful, polite, and kind – the type of guy every woman wants, right? Apparently not. Guys that are _too nice_ have a more difficult time moving out of the friend zone than guys who act like _complete dicks_. Some women even perceive excessive niceness as a weakness of character. You shouldn’t go full douchebag, but don’t be afraid to be a little hard, at times. It just lets her know you’re not a doormat.


Not really. 



> *You’re a Control Freak*
> 
> Source
> It’s your way, or the highway. There’s no room for compromise in your life. You like things the way you like them, and as long as everything goes according to your plan everything is cool. If you throw a temper tantrum the moment something is out of your control, you may need to lighten up a little.


Check, but in a more paranoid way.



> *You’re Too Shy*
> 
> Source
> 
> There comes a time in your life when you have to either man up and deal with your insecurities or face the fact that you’re going to die alone. If you don’t have any confidence when approaching women, enlist some friends to help you out. You may need to serve as a wingman for a while, but pay attention to what the pilot is doing. Observe him and learn how the game is played. And remember this: *Alcohol is your friend*.


Check.



> *You’re Selfish*
> 
> Source
> Did you fail “Sharing” in kindergarten? If you only ever think of yourself, get used to it because you’re the only person you’ll have to consider as you’ll be single for a while. If you can bring yourself to be a little less self-absorbed and a little more considerate, you may have a shot at a relationship. Try putting others before yourself a little more often.


Check.



> *You’re Broke*
> 
> Source
> If you’re broke all the time, how can you expect to maintain a relationship? You don’t have to buy a girl expensive gifts, but she will like to go out from time to time. If you’re tired of being single, you’ll have to work some dating funds into your budget.


Nope.



> *Your Friends Are Assholes*
> 
> Source
> It’s true, you’re judged by the company you keep. If you hang out with jerks, you’re likely a jerk too. Even if you’re not, you can’t stop your friends from acting like assholes and ruining any relationship you might have. Get some better friends.


Nope.



> *You’re In Love With Yourself*
> 
> Source
> You’re wonderful and perfect. You don’t need a relationship because everything you do, say and have is so delightful there is really no void to fill. It must be great to be you.


Check, but mostly in a self-hating way. I work out obsessively.



> *You’re a Workaholic*
> 
> Source
> Being career and goal-oriented isn’t a flaw, but it may take away relationship opportunities. If you’re too busy to have any kind of social life outside of work, you’re already married – _to your job_.


Nope.



> *You’re a Pervert*
> 
> Source
> We all think about sex – a lot. However, if you fail to disengage your eyes and mouth from your perverted thoughts you will repulse women. If you are looking for a relationship, you will need to learn this skill. It’s also a good idea to learn how to clear your cache and browser history.


Nope.



> *You’re In Love With Your Ex*
> 
> Source
> Your relationships may never work out if you’re still hung up on the one that got away. It’s best to move forward and let it go, especially if you’re looking for something new. No woman wants to live in the shadow of your ex. It’s also pathetic, so get over it.


Check.  I never talk to her, mention her, or anything! But it's still there...



> *You’re Boring*
> 
> Source
> What were you saying? Sorry, I fell asleep. You’re boring. Nobody wants to listen to you tell the same unfunny stories over and over. We’re sure your cat is awesome, but come on. Be interesting if you’re going to talk so much, otherwise just shut up and work the mysterious angle instead.


Check.  It's why I focus the conversation on them. 



> *You’re Obnoxious*
> 
> Source
> You always interrupt when people are speaking, usually to interject a random rude comment. You’re loud and you’re the only person who thinks you’re funny. You’re like nails on a chalkboard to most women, so _grow up_ and try listening to people for once.


I do not fit that description, but I am obnoxious. 



> *You’re a Liar*
> 
> Source
> Telling her that her ass doesn’t look big in those jeans isn’t a lie, it’s self-preservation. Telling her you were at church while you were at the racetrack is a lie. You only have to get caught in one big one to spoil something that could have been nice. Have the balls to tell the truth, _just don’t be brutal about it_.


Check, but it has never affected a relationship. 

All comes down to confidence, work ethic, and genetics.


----------



## gurlcorporate

this is hilarious! especially the photos that come along with them. )


----------



## Kami Gaben

Okay lets begin my case...

*You’re Shallow
*Lol no

*You’re Too Independent*
lol not really

*You’re Afraid of Commitment
*I can't really think of a relationship without a commitment... it doesn't make sense to me... I can't really get the idea of dating just cause...

*You’re a Slob
*A little yes... Guilty as charge

*You’re a Douchebag
*I'm not really a douchebag but this statement kinda goes wrong with what I see.... I see douchebags dating really nice girls

*You’re Addicted to Gaming
*Yeah... yes I am, that's why I try to find someone with the same addiction because I'll have something to talk about ( besides other issues ) but THIS is not really a reason to be single, because I'm not going to ever give up doing something I love for someone... she will have to respect it, what I can do is spend more time with the girl that gaming, but giving up gaming is hard for me.... because... videogames are awesome ;D

*You’re Desperate
*KINDA, because I'm almost 26 and never dated and I wanted really to know what it is.... I'm kinda desperate but I don't show it that much, most people think I hate relationships but I don't.. I just want to try and know what it is >_> ( yes it looks like this xD )

*You’re the Nice Guy
*My personality hits me with this, its hard for me to become mean or not being nice at all. I'm the nice guy because I can't be mean ( well I can I just don't show it that much ) this might be the reason why I'm single.

*You’re a Control Freak
*Not that much, I don't like controling people
*
You’re Too Shy
*Yes I am... and I hate Alchool, I don't like the taste of it. so yeah... Alchool is not my friend. Normaly when my friends try to hook me up with someone they fail at it... 

*You’re Selfish
*A Little yes not too much

*You’re Broke
*Second main reason.

*Your Friends Are Assholes
*Meh not really, my friends are actualy waiting for me to get into a relationship to know who will be... and they are always trying to guess who I like. 

*You’re In Love With Yourself

*Not by a long shot, I love myself yes but I'm not in love... 

*You’re a Workaholic*

Not really I enjoy more resting and fun time than having to work a lot.. only if the boss asks it but not really

*You’re a Pervert*

YES I AM, but to myself... I mean I don't try to show it to others but I prefer to keep my fantasies to myself. Still I don't mind being perv with someone if she feels in the mood or accpets that kind of talk. 


*You’re In Love With Your Ex*

If I had one... ._.


*You’re Boring*

ISTJ + Aspie says it all, but I can be fun if I get to know the person ._.

*You’re Obnoxious*

Maybe... no one really told me if I was 
_
*You’re a Liar

*_A Little...but for my own protection, when I don't want to say anything rude or offend the person... but they are no big lies, just small things that could prevent a desaster If I'm not confortable with the person


----------



## Laguna

meh


----------



## Mr. Meepers

Laguna said:


> Just had a friend cry on my shoulder about this very topic. Wasn't quite sure what to tell her.
> 
> If a girl you REALLY like spent a nice evening with you, was emotionally (and maybe even physically!) intimate with you, what should you do in the days following such a date?
> 
> A) nothing
> B) contact her- tell her you had a nice time- make her feel like half a person
> C) wait for her to contact you / but ignore her messages
> D) wait for her to contact you / but give her the "brush-off" -- short answer -- you're bothering me vibe
> 
> There's only 1 right answer. (Only 1 right answer if you actually like her and are half a man that is.) If you don't know it, refer to the OP's original posting of this 3 year-old thread (somewhere around #5.)


A few days is a while, but what about E) you try to call a few times and get nervous, but when she calls you pick up the phone right away and tell her how much fun you had? (I'm assuming we are talking about within the first few dates here).

You might say that he is shy (and maybe also emotional too), but I would not call him a douche bag if he did E .... A,C,D are pretty shitty things to do to someone though and I would call the person a jerk in those instances


----------



## Laguna

Mr. Meepers said:


> A few days is a while, but what about E) you try to call a few times and get nervous, but when she calls you pick up the phone right away and tell her how much fun you had? (I'm assuming we are talking about within the first few dates here).
> 
> You might say that he is shy (and maybe also emotional too), but I would not call him a douche bag if he did E .... A,C,D are pretty shitty things to do to someone though and I would call the person a jerk in those instances


I would totally agree with E) shy / emotional. That's hard- as my friend is emotional too. So I'm thinking they are going to have a rough time getting it together. (sad)


----------



## Mr. Meepers

Laguna said:


> I would totally agree with E) shy / emotional. That's hard- as my friend is emotional too. So I'm thinking they are going to have a rough time getting it together. (sad)


Awe ... don't be sad  *hugs*


----------



## Kami Gaben

If you watch anime and you're still single










this might be your problem xD


----------



## Athesis

I was desperate for a while. Now I'm getting over that, but I might still be a little selfish and controlling sometimes... and broke as shit


----------



## Fienigma

I'm so good-looking that girls get too nervous around me.


----------



## gurlcorporate

Fienigma said:


> I'm so good-looking that girls get too nervous around me.


Nowhere else to go but up then... I think that's the upside?


----------



## castigat

firedell said:


> NEERD.
> I watched my friend play that game, and I laughed at the seriousness of his game playing.


But I'm sometimes impressed if they talk about it really excitedly. At least they have a passion.

Also: _Chicks don’t really dig slobs_. (Especially if they're given the responsibility to clean it all up.)


----------



## dizzycactus

Haven't met a single obnoxious jerk that is single yet.


----------



## Vathir

I hate seeing games on this list. I like playing board/card games with other PEOPLE as much as playing video games by myself.


----------



## Philosophaser Song Boy

I disagree with being too nice. What is wrong with being a humble man, outside of caring about what others obsess over. I stayed after work many days to help coworkers with the upcoming weekend work they were assigned, mind you, it was a minimum wage job. Would I do this as often if I were not single? Absolutely not! I am so self-sacrificial when it comes to loving a woman. But until I finally have a SO, I refuse to make things about me for the sake of attracting attention, advertising myself to women while being unable to live up to how I sell myself to them.


----------



## AdrianBai

HAHAHA what narcissism! got laughed when I saw the photo


----------



## Penguin

I think I fit in the shy category. I just don't know how to steer a conversation to figure out if she might be interested or not.


----------



## Alysaria

Premium G said:


> I disagree with being too nice. What is wrong with being a humble man, outside of caring about what others obsess over. I stayed after work many days to help coworkers with the upcoming weekend work they were assigned, mind you, it was a minimum wage job. Would I do this as often if I were not single? Absolutely not! I am so self-sacrificial when it comes to loving a woman. But until I finally have a SO, I refuse to make things about me for the sake of attracting attention, advertising myself to women while being unable to live up to how I sell myself to them.



I think it's more about being a doormat than being nice. My bf knew a guy who moved a girl's stuff into her new apartment by himself while she was at work because he thought he'd get brownie points for dating her. The thing is, the "friend zone" only exists because of deception or delusion - either the girl is not being straight-forward or the guy is not acknowledging her disinterest and believes that persistence will win out in the end. An ulterior motive for being nice makes it questionable. 

The type of person who takes advantage of others as if they're entitled to it instead of just saying they aren't interested is not the type of person worth being in a relationship with... But neither is someone who treats the other person like their free-will matters less than the first's desire for a relationship. Attraction is either there or it isn't.


----------



## Philosophaser Song Boy

Alysaria said:


> I think it's more about being a doormat than being nice. My bf knew a guy who moved a girl's stuff into her new apartment by himself while she was at work because he thought he'd get brownie points for dating her. The thing is, the "friend zone" only exists because of deception or delusion - either the girl is not being straight-forward or the guy is not acknowledging her disinterest and believes that persistence will win out in the end. An ulterior motive for being nice makes it questionable.
> 
> The type of person who takes advantage of others as if they're entitled to it instead of just saying they aren't interested is not the type of person worth being in a relationship with... But neither is someone who treats the other person like their free-will matters less than the first's desire for a relationship. Attraction is either there or it isn't.


True, but sometimes attraction could be hidden. It is like saying you do not enjoy a food without ever even trying it.


----------



## Alysaria

Premium G said:


> True, but sometimes attraction could be hidden. It is like saying you do not enjoy a food without ever even trying it.


It depends. There are different kinds of attraction, and some people, myself included, who need an emotional connection before there can be any physical attraction. However, there are also pretty obvious indicators that a person is not interested - withdrawing from physical contact, losing all animation when addressed by the other party, being terse with or ignoring the other party outright, or things like that. Given a situation where someone shows clear discomfort with the other person's attentions or specifically says "You're a nice person, but I'm only interested in being friends" or perhaps less gentle ways of putting it....that's a pretty clear indication that persistence is not necessary or wanted.


----------



## Philosophaser Song Boy

Alysaria said:


> It depends. There are different kinds of attraction, and some people, myself included, who need an emotional connection before there can be any physical attraction. However, there are also pretty obvious indicators that a person is not interested - withdrawing from physical contact, losing all animation when addressed by the other party, being terse with or ignoring the other party outright, or things like that. Given a situation where someone shows clear discomfort with the other person's attentions or specifically says "You're a nice person, but I'm only interested in being friends" or perhaps less gentle ways of putting it....that's a pretty clear indication that persistence is not necessary or wanted.


So, persistence is almost never romantic, or worth the while? What if "lets just be friends" was never established? Or there was a null reaction instead of negative to physical contact? I just think women look at nice men and automatically try to leave them on hold, in hopes for finding a fictional match with another guy. Then when their dreams are shattered, they wonder where all the good men are, only to forget that she already judged them out.


----------



## Playful Proxy

My only big issue is my own inexperience romantically. I have no idea when I should be 'asking out' or kissing. I can go on dates, and talk with them, but the gooey emotional aspect eludes me.

So if, 
1) I enjoy being around someone and we can laugh and have a good time
and 
2) I am sexually attracted to that person and them me,
where is the hindering portion?


----------



## Senexx

This thread confuses me. The opening pages are not very empathetic but the closing pages seem to be supportive.
Trust me alcohol is not your friend if at a point you realise you have to grow up from your perverted youth but still makes you a shy adult. And you have very few friends if any that would support you in such an endeavour or if they have moved halfway across the country so it is hard to get their support.


----------



## mental blockstack

Confirmed: I am the first 3

-Shallow
-Too independent
-Afraid of commitment

:wink:


----------



## RetroVortex

I suffer from the typical symptoms.
Fat, Shy, and quite possibly insane! :laughing:


----------



## .17485

I think I am single because

Too Independent
Desperate
The Nice Guy
Shy

Is being too nice a bad thing?


----------



## Plaxico

Tega1 said:


> I think I am single because
> 
> Too Independent
> Desperate
> The Nice Guy
> Shy
> 
> Is being too nice a bad thing?


I'm interested in hearing about independent + desperate (from anyone). I just thought it was interesting you put both of them. Can one be both? I'm not questioning you but it looks as if those are conflicting in an overall sense? I've been both, but hardly at the same time. Independent could be construed as uninterested, not looking, aloof, or even not ready (not you just in a general sense), has anyone labelled you as desperate, or said you were too independent? I'm not saying one cannot logistically (can't think of a better word) be independent and desperate but wouldn't desperate indicate a sort of (unhealthy) DE-pendence on someone else (real or imagined)?


----------



## Slider

I'm poor.


----------



## Kabosu

Because women don't want things that also are contrasting, yet they don't want middle ground lol. re: OP.


----------



## .17485

Plaxico said:


> I'm interested in hearing about independent + desperate (from anyone). I just thought it was interesting you put both of them. Can one be both? I'm not questioning you but it looks as if those are conflicting in an overall sense? I've been both, but hardly at the same time. Independent could be construed as uninterested, not looking, aloof, or even not ready (not you just in a general sense), has *anyone labelled you as desperate, or said you were too independent?* I'm not saying one cannot logistically (can't think of a better word) be independent and desperate but wouldn't desperate indicate a sort of (unhealthy) DE-pendence on someone else (real or imagined)?


Do you mean if any girl has said that no. I put a thread about any girls interested in being in a relationship. I got called by a guy desperate for putting that. I think I act like that because I am paranoid that I'll get messed around. I got messed around by a girl before. Put my down. When people don't respond to texts quickly I think like that. I act like if the girl messes me around I can't date again. I got called independent being a girl. Just said were similar. Keeping ourselves to ourselves. I need to build my confidence before I date a woman.


----------



## Veeg

What the fuck did you just say?


----------



## slender

shygirl said:


> I have the tendency to be a slob, but I do clean up at the end of the day. When I'm with another slob I quit caring. When I'm with myself I, yeah, try to keep things clean because I prefer things clean. I have to do a 15 - 20 minute cleaning at the end of the day.
> 
> I CAN be a gamer. I am a recovering WoW addict. How DARE you show me that picture! Man, I really want to play. I can't, I can't. I have too much going on in my life right now.
> 
> I'm the nice girl. I not only get stepped on, but I pretty much ask to be stepped on. Then I end up getting mad that someone has walked all over me when I know that I'm the one who has let it happen in the first place.
> 
> I am really shy.
> 
> And broke.


omg. now if only i could meet you in real life.


----------



## 123roberta

sometimes they come in sheep clothing so be carfull


----------



## Grau the Great

>Treat women as equals. _(But always pay for them and hold doors open and show chivalry.)_

>Be successful. _(But don't let it show and come across as arrogant.)_

>Be masculine and strong. _(Unless it's an inappropriate time, which you're supposed to know without asking. Then be sensitive and the exact opposite.)_

>Have your own opinions. _(As long as they're the same as your gf/so's.)_

Why am I single? Low tolerance for bullsh*t. Simple as that :3


----------



## mental blockstack

I don't stay in the habit of socializing for long enough.

Also, I'm definitely the first 3 listed there.


And here's my little secret- at the end of the day, I question how much I truly care about any human being


----------



## refugee

Plaxico said:


> 1) You're not homeless
> 2) You probably have a lower chance of STD's.
> 3) With all the Michael Cera, Jonah Hill movies in the past decade, plus success of guys like Zuckerberg, you never know
> 4) You have more time, no job to bog you down or job-specific stresses
> 5) Not going to promote that, although at this point it makes you a badass Michael Cera (lol)
> 6) Romantic walks
> 7) Again, see number 2
> 8) Ok, that's a negative, but we all have them
> 9) Again, go back to #3, I also forgot about the Steve Carrell characters
> 10) Dammit, why didn't you say that from the get-go, I wouldn't have gone into the hassle of making you a list
> 11) Porn can kill motivation, but using masturbation as an excuse isn't a very good one.
> 
> See, you gotta think positive. Of course, work on those perceived weaknesses, but stay on the bright side.


This is one of the most positive things I've seen in this forum. It's all about perception.


----------



## Solrac026

I'm a cynical romantic.


----------



## Plaxico

refugee said:


> This is one of the most positive things I've seen in this forum. It's all about perception.


Thanks Refugee, it means a lot to hear / read that.


----------



## Penguin

Here's why I'm single, because when I look at another woman objectively and ask myself "are you worth all the shit I would have to go through in a relationship?" 99% of the time the answer is no. When its not I'm to damn nervous to talk to her because shes way out of my league, at least in my mind....even if she flirts with me despite the fact that I act like an idiot around her because I can't even string together a sentence much less a coherant thought when she walks in the room, in fact she's the only female who has ever done this to me.... and I barely know her, we just have a class together. well that escalated quickly.


----------



## vt1099ace

During those "prime years" people generally start bond pairing (21-38(ish)) I was either a poor broke and struggling college student and couldn't afford to date in early years then flat on my back in hospital attached to the machines that go 'ping' followed by the struggle to come back (like learning to walk again, talk and go one to make myself marketable and then pursuit of a stable job and along the way learned that no one could be interested in me now....the game played for the attention of a female is played against fitter, savior males that are at the top of their game and I know I play at that level anymore....so I opt out and just accept my place at the fringe of pack.


----------



## Cosmicsense

Mikbert said:


> Hey, WoW is serious buisness!!


My brother is ranked number 46 mage in the world (out of millions).

He spent something like 20-30 hours playing with his team every week for a few years. 

I never understood what was so great about these games. The amount of assisted play that's involved in newer games leads me to believe they've been "dumbed down". 

You ever see the old maps for games compared to newer ones?? I swear they used to be more complicated. 

I tried a racing game a few years ago, and you were guided into the correct position without even trying. Freaking ridiculous. 

So yea, I can't stand modern games. It seems like a huge waste of time. I'd rather be playing that ultimate video game... life. 

WoW bores the poo out of me.


----------



## TMWeiss

How about "because you choose to be single"? Or is only for people who wonder why they're single?


----------



## Robert Girghescu

Relationships are like yard sales. They look awesome from a distance, but once you're in one, it's just a bunch of shit you don't need...it's a good analogy from time to time...


----------



## Robert Girghescu

Sorry..double post.


----------



## Robert Girghescu

fn0rd said:


> #21. Choice - you haven't found a woman worthy of you. You know how great of a catch you are, and while you seek an equal for a committed relationship, you're find yourself mostly surrounded by superficial bobble-heads that are more interested in what kind of car you drive, what you do for a living or how many parties you can take them to. You refuse to settle for anything but the best for yourself, and scoff at your friends suggestions to just "go out with her, she's HOT!!1".


This.


----------



## Penguin

Robert Girghescu said:


> Relationships are like yard sales. They look awesome from a distance, but once you're in one, it's just a bunch of shit you don't need...it's a good analogy from time to time...


so so so so so true, fuck relationships


----------



## Death Persuades

I have four of those :/

Nice guy. (or at least I like to think I am.)
Shy.
Broke.
Boring.


----------



## Nephilim

To have girlfriend I'll have to kill my present self. All those things that I cherish, all those feelings that I relish. By abandoning them I'll open the brand new world. But it will also mean that my present self will cease to exist. But... this is not something to be sad about. On the contrary, as long as I myself find happiness in being single, then there is no need to envy other peoples' way of being happy. After all, love can take many different shapes, not only having a partner or whatever.

I wonder if it is... stupid.


----------



## Dashing

Laziness.


----------



## HonestAndTrue

Confession Time:

The negative:

*You're Too Independent:* Well, if we could just follow the schedule.
*You're Afraid of Commitment:* Well, afraid of divorce, yes.
*You're a Slob:* Hey, I know where everything is, just ask me.
*You're Desperate:* We had a schedule.
*You're a Nice Guy:* Today, yes.
*You're Too Shy:* Well, sex is easy, relationships aren't.
*You're a Workaholic:* I'm not broke though.
*You're a Pervert:* I find you very attractive.
*You're Boring:* If I told you what I was thinking, I'd think I'd scare you.

but

The positive:

There will always be time for you. (Got you scheduled in 7pm-10pm tonight.)
I will always be yours.
You can love me with Acts of Service.
You will always be in my thoughts.
I desire only the best for you.
I will never force you to do something for me.
I will provide for us.
I will satisfy you.
I want to make you comfortable.

so

I will be the man you ask me to be.

I'll hold your purse while you try on cloths for two hours.
I'll love you first and tell you I love you first.
I'll load the dishwasher.
I'll be patient.
I'll tell you your butt does look big in that. But I love your big butt.
I'll tell you what I think when I think it.
I'll work 12 hours or less each day.
I'll look into your eyes.
I'll surprise you.

Easier said than done.

New Years Resolution time boys. Time to become men (again).


----------



## refugee

Robert Girghescu said:


> Relationships are like yard sales. They look awesome from a distance, but once you're in one, it's just a bunch of shit you don't need...it's a good analogy from time to time...


I'm trying to imagine Tupac saying this.


----------



## Robert Girghescu

refugee said:


> I'm trying to imagine Tupac saying this.



Well Tupac did not say this...i just heard it some time ago...


----------



## Surreal Snake

I have not found the right person.


----------



## Takis

If I could not be all of these together then I would be way more perfect than possible. Men enjoy their flaws. Maybe stop being so picky ladies?


----------



## vt1099ace

I'm pretty sure I'm just a prick and trust no one...seems I was put on this earth just to piss people off.


----------



## Swordsman of Mana

um...how about
- you're too picky. 
- you're GAY. seriously, do you know how hard it is to find a viable relationship when your pool of potential mates is less than 5% of the population and a sizable percentage of the rest of the populous would desire to lynch you at the very prospect of it? I'll spare you the soap box, but let's just say it ain't easy


----------



## vt1099ace

Swordsman of Mana said:


> um...how about
> - you're too picky.
> - you're GAY. seriously, do you know how hard it is to find a viable relationship when your pool of potential mates is less than 5% of the population and a sizable percentage of the rest of the populous would desire to lynch you at the very prospect of it? I'll spare you the soap box, but let's just say it ain't easy


definately not gay, the idea of two dudes...well, makes my skin crawl, but if it's what your into...That's _your _P-bes, and a guys p-bes is _his _p-bes, I have my own p-bes and wouldn't like you getting into mine so I have now bes getting into yours...

too Picky? hardly, when in competition with smoother, slicker 'playas' out there, I know I can't win because I've been there, in that game in the past and didn't win then too.

But mostly, Im a prick....I don't like the public, I don't like the game or the 2D shallowness of it all.


----------



## Arbite

Is there an I want to remain single option. It annoys me that so many people think that happiness is intrinsically related to your relationship status.


----------



## Penguin

single and celibacy are two WAAAY different things ladies


----------



## kelcey.l.williams

well i've been accused of being too nice, but i think its mainly a surface or shallow reading of me. i've seen and know plenty of "nice guys" and i know there is a huge difference between me and them. yes i'm polite and have manners and always laughing and making others laugh, but i'm not paying for any damn body's phone or light bill. those other guys may and yeah i've seen them do that so i just don't get it. its not like a need a relationship but i do feel open to it, and also word has gotten back to me on many occasion that being too nice was many ladies first impression. i guess i could douche it up more like the post suggests and i've actually seen some of those too nice guys do, but i feel like that makes me feel fake and i'm not willing to compromise my state of legitimacy. thats all i'm saying, hell maybe i'm ugly lol. <--- i say jokingly of course i know i'm not


----------



## vt1099ace

Arbite said:


> Is there an I want to remain single option. It annoys me that so many people think that happiness is intrinsically related to your relationship status.


It would be nice to hve someone watch you back, someone you can trust, someone to let those protective instincts out for...not to mention the whole synergetic unit concept, stronger together than alone, to bolster each other when things get hard instead of having to 'bootstrap' yourself back up when you get a kick in the proverbial nads....

probly too romantasized a notion for real life...but one can always fantasize about what it could be like.


----------



## Arbite

vt1099ace said:


> It would be nice to hve someone watch you back, someone you can trust, someone to let those protective instincts out for...not to mention the whole synergetic unit concept, stronger together than alone, to bolster each other when things get hard instead of having to 'bootstrap' yourself back up when you get a kick in the proverbial nads....


That's what I have friends for.


----------



## chaoticbrain

Are there actually people who are confused about why their still single though ? I somehow find articles like this kind of condescending and annoying.


----------



## vt1099ace

Arbite said:


> That's what I have friends for.


i trust no one.....those i have trusted in the past screwed me, so i'd rather be a prick. prove to me anyone is worth trusting and i give in.


----------



## Arbite

vt1099ace said:


> i trust no one.....those i have trusted in the past screwed me, so i'd rather be a prick. prove to me anyone is worth trusting and i give in.


Well, if you don't trust friends, your neve going to enter a fulfilling relationship.


----------



## vt1099ace

Arbite said:


> Well, if you don't trust friends, your neve going to enter a fulfilling relationship.


I have aquaintences: neighbors, regulars at the market I go to, etc. Colleges from work (but once works over people go their own ways so I wouldn't really call them freinds), but true 'your like a bro (or sis) to me...nope, thought I did once but turnned out all they thought of me as was an expendable resource and once of no more use, treated me like a plague animal....
learned from those people, trust no one, don't have high expectations from anyone because they'll alway let you down AND most importantly to be self-reliant. 

Anyone that can prove they deserve my trust will get it and my loyalty, duty and guaranty I'll always do right for them.


----------



## Athesis

I'm shy and broke and lack the energy or motivation to do much. I guess I'll die alone, yaaaaaay!


----------



## Arbite

vt1099ace said:


> learned from those people, trust no one, don't have high expectations from anyone because they'll alway let you down AND most importantly to be self-reliant.
> 
> Anyone that can prove they deserve my trust will get it and my loyalty, duty and guaranty I'll always do right for them.


What a sad, lonely way to live.


----------



## vt1099ace

Arbite said:


> What a sad, lonely way to live.


like _you _know...
I've survived shit that would have left most of the people I knew sitting in a wheelchair staring out a window drooling on themselves, I've done more before I turned 30 than any of them, who have never been outside the state except to take the 2 hour trip up the hill to reno... I've proven my metal and paid my dues, many times over.

....so you can go circle jerk with the rest of these mental masturbaters, thinking you can pass judgement on me....all of you out there can if that's your attitudes....

I'd of would of walked away from this whole BS armchair amateur psychiatry forum along time ago _if there was a way to delete my account _and let you all be as pompas and self-rightious as you want...living in your own bubble as if any of this matters.


----------



## Credulous

chaoticbrain said:


> Are there actually people who are confused about why their still single though ? I somehow find articles like this kind of condescending and annoying.


For some reason I picture OP as really satisfied with himself after making this list.

I hate it when people tell me what to do.


----------



## remMUS

So, I need to be deep, dependent, not afraid of commitment, not a slob who touches his genitals (or not a slob in general), douchefree, less nerdy (or just not addicted to video games), not desperate, douchy (scratch that last one guys, apparently being a douche is good in moderate doses), non-controlling freak (is it the control or the freak part that's the problem? hmm...), more outgoing (by being more of a man and getting wasted a lot more), unselfish, reasonably well-off, have friends who are not assholes (or look like assholes, or smell like assholes, or are just connected with any assholes in a foreseeably remote way), less narcissistic, lazier, less pervy, more exciting, less of a douche (ok, now I'm seriously confused, what the hell do you want?), and more honest....


Oh, so that's why I haven't gotten girls. This was life-changing. Thanks !


----------



## Different

These explanations and supposed solutions by the Open poster annoy the hell out of me.


----------



## paperbrain

Ah, what a fun post. I’m an INTJ female and so I represent only 0.8% of the female population and what I am about to say is not going to jive with all women. Just the same I actually find some of the 20 reasons you listed for men and why they are still single actually to be things I would find assets in a guy. 

Independent: This is a great quality because it can mean low maintenance. Also it can mean the guy has inner drive and I can get my alone time while he goes and does whatever it is he likes to do as long as it isn’t being a serial killer or rapist something distasteful like that.

Desperate: This can bring out tenacity in a man. Tenacity is sexy. If he’s desperate and he’s willing to work to get you and he genuinely likes you that’s sexy. Guys who pursue you in a clever and non-threatening way are sexy. Stalking is usually not a good thing but it has its merits especially if it’s done creatively and legally like say getting some small nice thing from him anonymously. I wouldn’t recommend something explicit like stealing a girl’s panties, jerking off in them and pinning a note to the crotch about how she turned you on and shipping them to her in a box but you know, if the guy can write or draw or whatever, or a leave a single flower on her desk or something, that’s interesting and it’s sexy. 

Nice Guy: I love nice guys! I hate assholes, liars, cheaters, violent pricks; loudmouth would be funny guys that never shut up, etc. If a nice guy is clever, smart and talented in some way (I don’t care what the talent is this can range anywhere from being artistic to being scientific and somewhere in between) and he’s the straight guy girls always call their "friend" but not their "boyfriend", that’s the guy I’m interested in. Stealing a girl’s boyfriend is wrong and stupid. Especially since they're probably dating a jerk. But if a nice guy was interested in me and he’s the guy the girl’s go talk to when the piece of crap they’ve been dating fucks their best friend, that’s the guy I would try to get a date with.

Too Shy: Again, I love shy men. Shy usually means introverted and I love introverted men. They tend to be smarter, more clever and the biggest one of all, more imaginative. I don’t look for the finished product; I look for the guy with potential because if I were the girl that could give a guy confidence to achieve goals his natural talents are capable of reaching then I’d want to date that guy. I’d want to see how far he could go. 

Workaholic: One of the sexiest things about a guy is watching them do what they do best. If a guy loves his work and he’s not a manager (I hate business people) that fascinates me. And again it shows tenacity and drive and tenacity and drive are sexy. Now there is a caveat to this. If I was going to date that kind of guy he would have to put down the work once in a while and pay attention to me. It would be better for his work too because sometimes you have to walk away from what you’re working on, regroup and come back and do it better later.

Pervert: Pervert can sometimes be another word for sexually imaginative. There is a difference from being a pervert and a pig. A pervert is the guy who calls you up and says, “You’re so fucking sexy I want to jerk off to you while I watch you standing naked at your window” and then sends you a card telling you thank you. A pig is the guy who grabs your ass in front of his friends and laughs and says in front of everyone who just saw your ass get grabbed: “You’re so fucking sexy I want to jerk off to you while I watch you standing naked at your window.” 

Boring: This can sometimes mean dull and no imagination or it can mean no woman has gotten him sstirred up enough to drive him into a sexual frenzy, so this one can go both ways. 

Anyway, hope this was an okay response to your very cool post.


----------



## Penguin

paperbrain said:


> Ah, what a fun post. I’m an INTJ female and so I represent only 0.8% of the female population and what I am about to say is not going to jive with all women. Just the same I actually find some of the 20 reasons you listed for men and why they are still single actually to be things I would find assets in a guy.
> 
> Independent: This is a great quality because it can mean low maintenance. Also it can mean the guy has inner drive and I can get my alone time while he goes and does whatever it is he likes to do as long as it isn’t being a serial killer or rapist something distasteful like that.
> 
> Desperate: This can bring out tenacity in a man. Tenacity is sexy. If he’s desperate and he’s willing to work to get you and he genuinely likes you that’s sexy. Guys who pursue you in a clever and non-threatening way are sexy. Stalking is usually not a good thing but it has its merits especially if it’s done creatively and legally like say getting some small nice thing from him anonymously. I wouldn’t recommend something explicit like stealing a girl’s panties, jerking off in them and pinning a note to the crotch about how she turned you on and shipping them to her in a box but you know, if the guy can write or draw or whatever, or a leave a single flower on her desk or something, that’s interesting and it’s sexy.
> 
> Nice Guy: I love nice guys! I hate assholes, liars, cheaters, violent pricks; loudmouth would be funny guys that never shut up, etc. If a nice guy is clever, smart and talented in some way (I don’t care what the talent is this can range anywhere from being artistic to being scientific and somewhere in between) and he’s the straight guy girls always call their "friend" but not their "boyfriend", that’s the guy I’m interested in. Stealing a girl’s boyfriend is wrong and stupid. Especially since they're probably dating a jerk. But if a nice guy was interested in me and he’s the guy the girl’s go talk to when the piece of crap they’ve been dating fucks their best friend, that’s the guy I would try to get a date with.
> 
> Too Shy: Again, I love shy men. Shy usually means introverted and I love introverted men. They tend to be smarter, more clever and the biggest one of all, more imaginative. I don’t look for the finished product; I look for the guy with potential because if I were the girl that could give a guy confidence to achieve goals his natural talents are capable of reaching then I’d want to date that guy. I’d want to see how far he could go.
> 
> Workaholic: One of the sexiest things about a guy is watching them do what they do best. If a guy loves his work and he’s not a manager (I hate business people) that fascinates me. And again it shows tenacity and drive and tenacity and drive are sexy. Now there is a caveat to this. If I was going to date that kind of guy he would have to put down the work once in a while and pay attention to me. It would be better for his work too because sometimes you have to walk away from what you’re working on, regroup and come back and do it better later.
> 
> Pervert: Pervert can sometimes be another word for sexually imaginative. There is a difference from being a pervert and a pig. A pervert is the guy who calls you up and says, “You’re so fucking sexy I want to jerk off to you while I watch you standing naked at your window” and then sends you a card telling you thank you. A pig is the guy who grabs your ass in front of his friends and laughs and says in front of everyone who just saw your ass get grabbed: “You’re so fucking sexy I want to jerk offto you while I watch you standing naked at your window.”
> 
> Boring: This can sometimes mean dull and no imagination or it can mean no woman has gotten him sstirred up enough to drive him into a sexual frenzy, so this one can go both ways.
> 
> Anyway, hope this was an okay response to your very cool post.


pretty good, I had thought about asking an intj female out, she intimidates me a bit though...


----------



## paperbrain

Penguin said:


> pretty good, I had thought about asking an intj female out, she intimidates me a bit though...


If you like her you should ask her out, but be prepared to have to ask her out more than once before she says yes. Sometimes we have a nasty habit of wanting to test men and I apologize for this. We get a kick out of it and we want to find out how much inner strenth you have because we don't trust people very well and assume people are bad until proven otherwise. And it's kind of our way of flirting. If she likes to banter with you she probably attracted to you even if she hasn't actually figured that out yet. If we seem a bit intimidating it is sometimes because we are focused on what we are thinking about and it can also be a defense mechinism. Also sometimes we INTJ women can completely oblivious about a man liking us. It simply doesn't occur to us that you like us. You have to kind of let us know, drop us a hint of something or we go merrily about whatever it is we are doing and never realize you like us. The INTJ achilles heel is romance. We may seem intimidating, aloof, cold etc, but we can be very warm and fuzzy on the inside if we like a guy. And we are usually loyal.


----------



## Penguin

paperbrain said:


> If you like her you should ask her out, but be prepared to have to ask her out more than once before she says yes. Sometimes we have a nasty habit of wanting to test men and I apologize for this. We get a kick out of it and we want to find out how much inner strenth you have because we don't trust people very well and assume people are bad until proven otherwise. And it's kind of our way of flirting. If she likes to banter with you she probably attracted to you even if she hasn't actually figured that out yet. If we seem a bit intimidating it is sometimes because we are focused on what we are thinking about and it can also be a defense mechinism. Also sometimes we INTJ women can completely oblivious about a man liking us. It simply doesn't occur to us that you like us. You have to kind of let us know, drop us a hint of something or we go merrily about whatever it is we are doing and never realize you like us. The INTJ achilles heel is romance. We may seem intimidating, aloof, cold etc, but we can be very warm and fuzzy on the inside if we like a guy. And we are usually loyal.


What if I said something like "hey...so, I've been trying to figure out a way to hit on you for a while but considering we don't see each other that much I figured I'd just tell you" 

and see what she says?


----------



## paperbrain

I think that sounds cool. I might leave off the "hey...so," part. Just be direct...but polite and nice and of course say it with a touch of humor. You might also say it just what your going to say a little slowly and pause slightly after saying, "but" and hold the suspense just for a second. The rest sounds great to me. I hope she tells you yes. If you feel so inclined, let me know how it goes.


----------



## Penguin

paperbrain said:


> I think that sounds cool. I might leave off the "hey...so," part. Just be direct...but polite and nice and of course say it with a touch of humor. You might also say it just what your going to say a little slowly and pause slightly after saying, "but" and hold the suspense just for a second. The rest sounds great to me. I hope she tells you yes. If you feel so inclined, let me know how it goes.


thanks, I will (=


----------



## Robert Girghescu

This videos needs to replace all that reasons:


----------



## SharpestNiFe

Independent, douchebag, workaholic, in love with my self probably for me hahaha.


----------



## JamesDowns

I read this and cry.:crying: Guys, I'm going to die alone.


----------



## Mr. Meepers

JamesDowns said:


> I read this and cry.:crying: Guys, I'm going to die alone.


Nahhh, I would not take this list too seriously ... Everyone wants something different and there are women who want you as you are ... this list is not something you should go by .... Everyone is different and as long as you are a good person and you realize the value in yourself, then you don't need to change anything ... you'll grow with time ... but there are people who would love you just the way you are now ^__^


----------



## JamesDowns

Mr. Meepers said:


> Nahhh, I would not take this list too seriously ... Everyone wants something different and there are women who want you as you are ... this list is not something you should go by .... Everyone is different and as long as you are a good person and you realize the value in yourself, then you don't need to change anything ... you'll grow with time ... but there are people who would love you just the way you are now ^__^


I really want to believe you but I have doubts...lots and lots of doubts. I might doubt the possibility of finding a girl to like me more than I doubt the existence of god...and I'm an atheist.


----------



## Mr. Meepers

JamesDowns said:


> I really want to believe you but I have doubts...lots and lots of doubts. I might doubt the possibility of finding a girl to like me more than I doubt the existence of god...and I'm an atheist.


lol ... we all have doubts, but there are a lot of people in this world and there is a lot of variation between people that even if you match someone of the qualities on this list, such as playing a lot of video games ... there are women out there that want that ... The problem with these lists are that they try to make you feel like everyone wants the same thing and that is not true.


----------



## RetroVortex

Mr. Meepers said:


> lol ... we all have doubts, but there are a lot of people in this world and there is a lot of variation between people that even if you match someone of the qualities on this list, such as playing a lot of video games ... there are women out there that want that ... The problem with these lists are that they try to make you feel like everyone wants the same thing and that is not true.


Yeah, I mean what kind of girl *wouldnt *like the idea of co-opping Mario in the buff, and in the arms of her guy... ;D
(one i certainly would be hesitant to date that's for sure! XD)

Edit: or Strip Street Fighter, where who ever loses the matchup has to lose an item of clothing... >

Edit 2: maybe a little mirror fun. Try to not get distracted by the sexy girl while you try to play a game in the mirror.
oh yeah... I could come up with these all day...


----------



## Mr. Meepers

RetroVortex said:


> Yeah, I mean what kind of girl *wouldnt *like the idea of co-opping Mario in the buff, and in the arms of her guy... ;D
> (one i certainly would be hesitant to date that's for sure! XD)
> 
> Edit: or Strip Street Fighter, where who ever loses the matchup has to lose an item of clothing... >
> 
> Edit 2: maybe a little mirror fun. Try to not get distracted by the sexy girl while you try to play a game in the mirror.
> oh yeah... I could come up with these all day...


lol Your second edit reminded me of the girlfriend trying to have sex with her bf when he just wants to play video games

Note: Be more respectful than these gamers


----------



## JamesDowns

RetroVortex said:


> Yeah, I mean what kind of girl *wouldnt *like the idea of co-opping Mario in the buff, and in the arms of her guy... ;D
> (one i certainly would be hesitant to date that's for sure! XD)
> 
> Edit: or Strip Street Fighter, where who ever loses the matchup has to lose an item of clothing... >
> 
> Edit 2: maybe a little mirror fun. Try to not get distracted by the sexy girl while you try to play a game in the mirror.
> oh yeah... I could come up with these all day...


I once played strip Magic the Gathering with my ex. It was kinda sexy except for the fact that I kept winning so it was kinda sad.


----------



## RetroVortex

JamesDowns said:


> I once played strip Magic the Gathering with my ex. It was kinda sexy except for the fact that I kept winning so it was kinda sad.


That's why you need to learn to throw the game once in a while! ;D
(or at least design the game so that you can sleight of hand it a little. (Or make sure you're both as good as each other too if you want to be all lame and honest about it! XD))


----------



## JamesDowns

RetroVortex said:


> That's why you need to learn to throw the game once in a while! ;D
> (or at least design the game so that you can sleight of hand it a little. (Or make sure you're both as good as each other too if you want to be all lame and honest about it! XD))


I pride myself too much to throw a game. I ain't throwing a game if Im playing the queen of England.


----------



## RetroVortex

JamesDowns said:


> I pride myself too much to throw a game. I ain't throwing a game if Im playing the queen of England.


Sometimes you just have to let the Wookie win! XD


----------



## Felidire

#21: You cbf'd pursuing a relationship? xD


----------



## ValK

cbf it is


----------



## Marek

If I could pick from this list the labels for me that would be shy (but less with every year), being unable to get past this superficial small-talk "niceness" (I'm always strongly aware of it and it annoys me) and definitely being workoholic. Once in a while I feel like I'm boring when talkig with girls but it's more likely shyness that prevents me from being more spontaneous with things I want to say.


----------



## Bricolage

Those actually seem somewhat accurate. Haha I feel like the control one is aimed at XNTJ and the obnoxious one, sorry guys, XNFP. :kitteh:


----------



## Joseph

I'm still most of these and recently not single. Meh.


----------



## Penguin

reason #21 because I self sabotage. It's like when I have a legitimate chance at happiness my brain operator for relationships hits the EJECT button on his chair and goes on a drinking binge in space while his replacement who is a retarded destructive monkey takes over the controls. Then the smoke clears and bob just floats back down to the cranium like nothing ever happened. 
ass.


----------



## Bricolage

Penguin said:


> reason #21 because I self sabotage. It's like when *I have a legitimate chance at happiness my brain *operator for relationships hits the EJECT button on his chair and goes on a drinking binge in space while his replacement who is a retarded destructive monkey takes over the controls. Then the smoke clears and bob just floats back down to the cranium like nothing ever happened.
> ass.


*yoda voice* true happiness comes from observing the ego-mind without seeking and not from indulging ego-mind. :happy:


----------



## Nick Carraway

great list


----------



## spada

You're too independent and you're afraid of commitment for me. Should i work on it?


----------



## Codger

yannibos said:


> Independent, douchebag, workaholic, in love with my self probably for me hahaha.


I shall call you, "mini-me" :*)


----------



## dizzycactus

Joseph said:


> I'm still most of these and recently not single. Meh.


most people in relationships are not perfect. these lists are just rationalisational BS mostly.

and the lack of comma before men in the title annoys me.


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## Brian1

The dating sites you use are all discovered to be scams from Nigeria. What a fraudulent company who would've thunk it?

As family feud would say, "show me dating sites scams from a foreign country, for the win?"


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## Darksider

I'm about half. It's better than being all of them.


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## randev

hmm, I'm more of a nice but shy guy, and guess I'm afraid of commitment. and maybe boring qualifies too. gosh! too many.


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## Immerseyourself

Mr. Meepers said:


> lol ... we all have doubts, but there are a lot of people in this world and there is a lot of variation between people that even if you match someone of the qualities on this list, such as playing a lot of video games ... there are women out there that want that ... The problem with these lists are that they try to make you feel like everyone wants the same thing and that is not true.


You are correct that there is a lot of variation and the list shouldn’t be a strict guide, but the list also is somewhat stooped in our instincts. I can’t say that I won’t be alone forever, because I’m still very young, but my personal experience with women (in the western culture) is that you make a _lot_ of effort towards women, or you go home alone. 
You need to stop being too independent. I am; I find it hard to envisage sharing my life with someone. In my daydreams I like the idea of it, but in reality I wonder at the validity of it in my life. Each day I go home, I choose what to eat, what to cook (if I decide to that day), what to wear, and what to do. Having someone else tell me and me expending time and energy either arguing or conforming, doesn’t sit well with me. I’ve lived so much of my life in my mind, and been so independent and on my own, that having someone come into my life can seem like an alien presence. 
Being too shy, and a workaholic, also presents a problem. Both of those limit your ability to get a mate. Women don’t normally approach men, and people like me don’t have much of a social life. I’m either at work, volunteering my time (hardly any women there), at home, or at a friend’s place. 
Those two, coupled with independence, don’t get you any women.
You can apply a formula to this as well. I don’t know the specifics (due to the complexity of measurement) or even really how the formula should work (I may sit down one day and create one) but it’ll do in the abstract:


Finding a mate = [those on the list + their impacts (your chance of meeting a woman on a daily basis and conversing, as well as your way of attracting women)] - geography (how many women in your area) - age - availability of the opposite gender - compatibility - ethnicity (not being racist here, but let’s be honest, how many relationships actually cross ethnicities?) - your own expectations - their own expectations - personality (debatable; may also fall under compatibility but may be different).
I’m likely missing some other variables, but those are major points. You need to focus on those major points in order increase your chances of finding a mate. I can use me as an example: I don’t get out a lot, don’t attract women, and I barely socialize with women. I also live in an area of a lot of Hispanics (again, not racist, but in all my life I’ve only met 2 Caucasians who married someone of Hispanic ethnicity so genetics/ethnical preferences must be evident based on my observational experience) who never show interest in me. I don’t go into too much unfamiliar territory or geographical areas that attract new people all the time. I have strange morals and ethics that are personalized and not necessarily based on society’s standards. I have high expectations, and all of the women I have liked were generally married, so no go there. I have always been very different and mature for my age group, so I hang around older people; age is an issue.
With all of that, I think that the in conditions like that finding a mate would be nigh impossible if not extremely limited. If you change geography, expectations, ideals and beliefs, and tweak personality a little, the odds would escalate dramatically.


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## Mr. Meepers

Immerseyourself said:


> You are correct that there is a lot of variation and the list shouldn’t be a strict guide, but the list also is somewhat stooped in our instincts. I can’t say that I won’t be alone forever, because I’m still very young, but my personal experience with women (in the western culture) is that you make a _lot_ of effort towards women, or you go home alone.


I don't have a lot of dating experience and I am shy, but I am also a flirt by nature, so I can't say I put much effort into attracting women, but I've been told (by both men and women) that I am very charming lol ... But you do need to make an effort to attract a lot of people, but it is not hard to attract one person ... Although, I usually attract my friends or friends of friends.



> You need to stop being too independent. I am; I find it hard to envisage sharing my life with someone. In my daydreams I like the idea of it, but in reality I wonder at the validity of it in my life. Each day I go home, I choose what to eat, what to cook (if I decide to that day), what to wear, and what to do. Having someone else tell me and me expending time and energy either arguing or conforming, doesn’t sit well with me. I’ve lived so much of my life in my mind, and been so independent and on my own, that having someone come into my life can seem like an alien presence.


Some people like independance lol ... I was with a woman who was too dependant on me to the point that it was like she could not survive without me and such a relationship is probably not healthy ... and could you attract more women if you were less independent? Maybe, but I would think you would be better off being with a woman who ether as independent as you (relationship where you two basically have your own separate lives, but share some things together) or someone who is more on the dependant side but she is a go with the flow type of person (like me :wink:, if I did not have a penis ... okay, perhaps more go with the flow/follower than I am lol).
BUt, yes, not letting people in your life romantically will make it harder for you to not be single, but I don't think you need a list to tell you that, besides, I was more talking about being attractive to others and whether you should "change yourself" for someone you never met yet. ... Having certain traits may make you more desirable to the opposite sex, (I imagine this is especially true in cultures with strong gender roles or in cultures that greatly value conformity), but there is still someone who will like you for you ... you may have to look harder, but I think it would be a healthier relationship. And if you can't be yourself in a relationship, then it may be better to not be in one. ... Some of the things on the list are right though "You are in love with your ex", if by "in love" they mean infatuated, then yes and, I would add, you are probably not ready for a new relationship yet ... but the addicted to games one, in (American) society we seem to look at people who play videogames as "immature", so, if people turn you down for playing video games, then look for someone who is interested in playing games ... if you are actually addicted, that is a different story (although, I do think there are people who are addicted to sports, but that addiction is considered socially acceptable)



> Being too shy, and a workaholic, also presents a problem. Both of those limit your ability to get a mate. Women don’t normally approach men, and people like me don’t have much of a social life. I’m either at work, volunteering my time (hardly any women there), at home, or at a friend’s place.
> Those two, coupled with independence, don’t get you any women.


I'm shy ^__^ so I usually get along with shy women (when I do more talking and make them laugh) and very outgoing women (I do more listening).
But, being shy introvert does make it harder to meet women and being an independant workaholic also makes it hard (not impossible, but hard) ... but none of those are negative qualities (I know introvert and shy is a dirty word to some people lol) ... As far as the workaholic, if you don't find someone who is an independant workaholic, then yes, you may have to choose what is more important to you and compromise ... but again, if someone is a shy, independant (independent in the way where they don't let others in their life), workaholic ... then they probably know why they are single (if they are single), but none of those are negative qualities.



> You can apply a formula to this as well. I don’t know the specifics (due to the complexity of measurement) or even really how the formula should work (I may sit down one day and create one) but it’ll do in the abstract:
> 
> 
> Finding a mate = [those on the list + their impacts (your chance of meeting a woman on a daily basis and conversing, as well as your way of attracting women)] - geography (how many women in your area) - age - availability of the opposite gender - compatibility - ethnicity (not being racist here, but let’s be honest, how many relationships actually cross ethnicities?) - your own expectations - their own expectations - personality (debatable; may also fall under compatibility but may be different).


Most of my romantic and/or sexual relationships have been with a woman who was another ethnicity :laughing: ... Also, I've know a number of people while they were dating someone of another ethnicity, so I'm not the right person to ask that ... I would imagine that relationships with people of different cultural backgrounds may be rarer though (depending on how close each one is to their cultural backgrounds) 
Also, looking at your variables and thinking about how set theory is applied to probability, I would think wherever you have a "+", it would look more legit if it was a multiplication sign and where ever you have a "-" you should probably have a division sign and the whole thing should be multiplied by some constant with weird units (so all the units in the equation cancel out) ...if you did that it would look more legit XD  ... Oh and change "Finding a mate" to "probability of attracting a partner" ... because it is nondeterministic lol

Yup, there are many factors that affect finding a partner, but there are also a lot of people and a lot of ways to meet people as well ... even with all the variables, but the sheer number of people who match your sexual preference (in your case women) and the variability within people, chances are still pretty good that you will meet someone if you are looking for a relationship.



> I’m likely missing some other variables, but those are major points. You need to focus on those major points in order increase your chances of finding a mate. I can use me as an example: I don’t get out a lot, don’t attract women, and I barely socialize with women. I also live in an area of a lot of Hispanics (again, not racist, but in all my life I’ve only met 2 Caucasians who married someone of Hispanic ethnicity so genetics/ethnical preferences must be evident based on my observational experience) who never show interest in me. I don’t go into too much unfamiliar territory or geographical areas that attract new people all the time. I have strange morals and ethics that are personalized and not necessarily based on society’s standards. I have high expectations, and all of the women I have liked were generally married, so no go there. I have always been very different and mature for my age group, so I hang around older people; age is an issue.
> With all of that, I think that the in conditions like that finding a mate would be nigh impossible if not extremely limited. If you change geography, expectations, ideals and beliefs, and tweak personality a little, the odds would escalate dramatically.


Odds may increase dramatically ... but think of it as "quality vs quantity" .... or in this case "compatibility vs quantity" (because most people are quality people, you just have to ask the right person lol)
You can meet a lot of people while you are not being yourself and you may meet a few who are compatible with the actual you (assuming you dating lots of women) and not the you you are pretending to be and the ones that will stay will be compatible with someone who is not you ... OR, you can date a few women who are all very compatible with you and you can have a healthy relationship with yourself and have a relationship with someone you are compatible with


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## Charlton Palmer

"Awkward Penguin" the movie, starring me!


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## Bricolage

I'm single because I want to be and I don't look haha. Or that's what I tell myself anyway. :tongue:


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## Immerseyourself

Mr. Meepers said:


> I don't have a lot of dating experience and I am shy, but I am also a flirt by nature, so I can't say I put much effort into attracting women, but I've been told (by both men and women) that I am very charming lol ... But you do need to make an effort to attract a lot of people, but it is not hard to attract one person ... Although, I usually attract my friends or friends of friends.


Making an effort to attract people is a choice, not a behavior that your lifestyle is dependent on to survive. I really have no inclination to flirt with women, or even to get to know them. I'm too busy stuck in my world, in my thoughts, in my emotions. I don't know anyone that openly hates or dislikes me, as I generally don't like to to get on the bad side of people, but I never make _much _of an effort doing that; all I do is not be an idiot. 
I don't exactly follow social conventions though; I ignore half of them to the point that I've insulted people before. I'm not a charming guy because I can be blunt, to the point, exceedingly analytical, or else in the background floating through the environment. 




> Some people like independance lol ... I was with a woman who was too dependant on me to the point that it was like she could not survive without me and such a relationship is probably not healthy ... and could you attract more women if you were less independent? Maybe, but I would think you would be better off being with a woman who ether as independent as you (relationship where you two basically have your own separate lives, but share some things together) or someone who is more on the dependant side but she is a go with the flow type of person (like me :wink:, if I did not have a penis ... okay, perhaps more go with the flow/follower than I am lol).


Lol. Finding a woman just as independent is possible. That is a trait that I can't disagree with finding.



> BUt, yes, not letting people in your life romantically will make it harder for you to not be single, but I don't think you need a list to tell you that, besides, I was more talking about being attractive to others and whether you should "change yourself" for someone you never met yet. ... Having certain traits may make you more desirable to the opposite sex, (I imagine this is especially true in cultures with strong gender roles or in cultures that greatly value conformity), but there is still someone who will like you for you ... you may have to look harder, but I think it would be a healthier relationship.


I really think that the dating game is a waste of time. I refuse to go out of my way to take the first steps. I think that the majority of the female gender are so stooped within a pose of vulnerability and passiveness, that it really annoys me. The conventional woman annoys me with their dating tactics. A headstrong woman who knows what she wants appeals to me because she would be unique (and they are) and would compliment me well.
Someone liking you for you is an advanced stage of a relationship. The initial stage is all about "What can you bring to the table, and what can I bring to the table" as well as "Let's get to know each other. By the way, there are fifty million different ways to fail the first few times we go out."
The initial stage stops me from pursuing relationships; I don't engage in that shallow, ritualistic, conforming, and catering-to-their-whims attitude. 
I know I would have to look harder; I can't be bothered making the effort. I have a _lot_ of things in my life that takes up my time and energy, and putting in that effort is the least thing I would want to do.



> And if you can't be yourself in a relationship, then it may be better to not be in one. ...


I agree that if you can't be yourself, you may as well not be in one. I usually end up not being myself because I get so nervous, rigid, and hypothetical. I conjure up worst-case scenarios, and expend a lot of energy on being anxious. 



> Some of the things on the list are right though "You are in love with your ex", if by "in love" they mean infatuated, then yes and, I would add, you are probably not ready for a new relationship yet ... but the addicted to games one, in (American) society we seem to look at people who play videogames as "immature", so, if people turn you down for playing video games, then look for someone who is interested in playing games ... if you are actually addicted, that is a different story (although, I do think there are people who are addicted to sports, but that addiction is considered socially acceptable)


Sports addiction is acceptable to society in places like the U.S. because of the prevalent societal attitude of ESXX or ISXX. Gaming addiction is more of an INXX if I do say so. I imagine some ISXX become addicted as well, but it is usually those personalities that "aren't down-to-earth in a physical way".




> I'm shy ^__^ so I usually get along with shy women (when I do more talking and make them laugh) and very outgoing women (I do more listening).
> But, being shy introvert does make it harder to meet women and being an independant workaholic also makes it hard (not impossible, but hard) ... but none of those are negative qualities (I know introvert and shy is a dirty word to some people lol)


How are these not negative qualities. They obviously aren't that beneficial compared to the alternative. Being an outgoing and energetic guy works absolute wonders. Being a shy introvert who spends a lot of time at work, or volunteering (the two often intertwined) result in a large aggregate handicap. 



> ... As far as the workaholic, if you don't find someone who is an independant workaholic, then yes, you may have to choose what is more important to you and compromise ... but again, if someone is a shy, independant (independent in the way where they don't let others in their life), workaholic ... then they probably know why they are single (if they are single), but none of those are negative qualities.


I disagree. You should never have to compromise. One of the reasons why I believe you shouldn't is that compromising means conforming to the rules of others. Why should I compromise all of this in my life, just to play the dating/social game with women? I'm expected to give parts of my life in order to cater to the whims of others? I'm sorry, but I don't think so. I'm all for sacrificing my time to help out people (I'd give the shirt off my back and stand in the sun until I go red in order to help someone) but I refuse to advertize mysef.
I guess that is the issue that I've always had: I can't stand submitting packages in for awards at work. I've never liked writing resumes in order to promote myself. If someone tries to throw me in the spotlight, I bow out and throw them in. My attitude has always been "You take what I give you, or else _kindly_ leave me alone." I will be stubborn, I will argue, I will internally seethe, because I believe that throwing yourself out there like that is distasteful. I do what is necessary, what is important, what achieves the end objective and promotes the best result to the greater picture. 
I envision the world to a certain degree as accomplishable by me, even though the greater portion of it cannot be accomplished. What I can accomplish, I seek to do; I will sacrifice a lot in order to achieve it.
But I will not engage in petty, shallow, and insignificant social and cultural games _just because__. 
_ 



> Most of my romantic and/or sexual relationships have been with a woman who was another ethnicity :laughing: ... Also, I've know a number of people while they were dating someone of another ethnicity, so I'm not the right person to ask that ... I would imagine that relationships with people of different cultural backgrounds may be rarer though (depending on how close each one is to their cultural backgrounds)


I guess I meant to highlight "cultural background" as the primary factor. 



> Also, looking at your variables and thinking about how set theory is applied to probability, I would think wherever you have a "+", it would look more legit if it was a multiplication sign and where ever you have a "-" you should probably have a division sign and the whole thing should be multiplied by some constant with weird units (so all the units in the equation cancel out) ...if you did that it would look more legit XD  ... Oh and change "Finding a mate" to "probability of attracting a partner" ... because it is nondeterministic lol


I've never been good at mathematics. I'll keep this in mind though. I actually might follow through on it. If you ever do so yourself, let me know. I'd be really interested in it.



> Yup, there are many factors that affect finding a partner, but there are also a lot of people and a lot of ways to meet people as well ... even with all the variables, but the sheer number of people who match your sexual preference (in your case women) and the variability within people, chances are still pretty good that you will meet someone if you are looking for a relationship.


Becoming engaged in a lot of people as well as the different ways in meeting people is directly proportionate to your interests, skill set, and energy levels. I am interested in books, thinking, internet browsing, and the occasional video gaming. My skill set is extremely limited because my interests don't allow me to expand much on skills. My energy levels are generally low, and I enjoy solitude. This means that engaging with different people is limited, as well engaging in different things. 





> Odds may increase dramatically ... but think of it as "quality vs quantity" .... or in this case "compatibility vs quantity" (because most people are quality people, you just have to ask the right person lol)
> You can meet a lot of people while you are not being yourself and you may meet a few who are compatible with the actual you (assuming you dating lots of women) and not the you you are pretending to be and the ones that will stay will be compatible with someone who is not you ... OR, you can date a few women who are all very compatible with you and you can have a healthy relationship with yourself and have a relationship with someone you are compatible with


The issue isn't necessarily compatability. The issue is with connecting to people. If you can't connect to people, or _you are never in the mood to do so_ then compatability isn't even a factor in the equation.


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## Darkley

LOL the "your a pervert" picture  classic


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## Michael82

Mikbert said:


> lol, I don't qualify for any of those, I guess you should add *You're a typ 5 sp/so/sx INTJ.
> 
> 
> *EDIT: btw, world of warcraft is actually a really good game


Edit2: "was".

Ontopic: it's rather about valuing your bad and good traits and balancing them than saying that for example a pervert couldn't find love. Hell yeah I love my bad traits, as long as they keep in line with my life :wink:.

I am too shy, a bit of a pervert sometimes, too insecure, lacking initiative, and ignorant. So what? Finding your moment and grabbing your chance is what it's all about. Don't hold back.


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## videlicet

Obviously the list unveils some classical issues, although for me it's too generic. I am indeed quite independent. And also: idealistic (in the sense of being moralistic and disciplined), conscientious, 'prudent', committed to nature and more focused on the inner experience and intellect, as well as art. I can't enjoy much of going out and I drink no alcohol except for the few swallows mulled wine when Christmas. I'm also a cautious eater, very highly sensitive and need emotional comfort in a relationship.
Add, to this, that I'm isolated in contact with peers, since I'm doing a home study at distance. At least, I am attending a nice and fun weekly yoga class, but the other participants are (much) older--it doesn't matter! I feel more accepted between them. The only thing is that I miss connection to 1) (male) of roughly around my age (I won't meet other adolescents) 2) enough of personality factors in common. Well, with this description, you'll understand that it's a rather complicated situation for a person like me. However I'm almost convinced that I am 'better off' with someone older in age. I often feel like having an older soul than body (compared to people of my age; I'm 19).


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## Aquamarine

Marino said:


> *You’re the Nice Guy*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Source
> You’re always helpful, polite, and kind – the type of guy every woman wants, right? Apparently not. Guys that are _too nice_ have a more difficult time moving out of the friend zone than guys who act like _complete dicks_. Some women even perceive excessive niceness as a weakness of character. You shouldn’t go full douchebag, but don’t be afraid to be a little hard, at times. It just lets her know you’re not a doormat.


It's the same for women with this one, and it's the only one that I could not understand at all.


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## Luke

Athena Avril said:


> It's the same for women with this one, and it's the only one that I could not understand at all.


Only certain segments of society see being nice as a sign of weakness, or as an unattractive quality. It can be easy to get the impression that it is a pervasive viewpoint, as there are people who push this belief forward quite loudly and aggressively. Most reasonable people know better and appreciate kindness. I know for men, there are some males and females in society who believe that men should be domineering and aggressive and they see any sign of softness as being counter to this trait. From my perspective, I have little desire to associate with these sorts of people and if they feel the same way about me, then all the better :wink:


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## RetroVortex

I have to agree.

I mean if anything niceness enhances the attraction for me personally.

I mean one girl at work would seem quite plain to most men, but to me, she seems incredibly attractive.

It started when I needed help at work looking for stockings for a client. She came straight up to me and helped me out. She's so sweet and sincere, I can't help but gush a little every time I talk to her. :3


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## Aquamarine

Luke said:


> Only certain segments of society see being nice as a sign of weakness, or as an unattractive quality. It can be easy to get the impression that it is a pervasive viewpoint, as there are people who push this belief forward quite loudly and aggressively. Most reasonable people know better and appreciate kindness. I know for men, there are some males and females in society who believe that men should be domineering and aggressive and they see any sign of softness as being counter to this trait. From my perspective, I have little desire to associate with these sorts of people and if they feel the same way about me, then all the better :wink:


It's the opposite reason for me; people find me too boyish for a woman and call me a butch. I can understand how you feel about being forced to fit into a mold. I, too, refuse to associate from these people from now on.

On the other hand, I can be a very nice person, but people treat me as their doormat. I've had enough of all that nonsense.


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## Aquamarine

RetroVortex said:


> I have to agree.
> 
> I mean if anything niceness enhances the attraction for me personally.
> 
> I mean one girl at work would seem quite plain to most men, but to me, she seems incredibly attractive.
> 
> It started when I needed help at work looking for stockings for a client. She came straight up to me and helped me out. She's so sweet and sincere, I can't help but gush a little every time I talk to her. :3


She sounds like a good match to you. Go ask her out!


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## Codger

Codger said:


> Bit of a cunt really.


Two and half years later, not much has changed here. 

I'm nothing if not consistent.


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## LibertyPrime

*Reason #21* You have better things to do then waste time, energy and resources on dating and don't give a damn because you are young.

^^; this would be my main one.


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## intjonn

I read over the 20 reasons and think that one about being over 25 and still living with 'mommy & daddy' should have been included.........


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## Archetype

I dont agree that being nice guy make you still single, nice guys also could have a girlfriend, the key is dont put yourself below others


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