# Mirroring othwer people's mental state..odd, but why?



## LibertyPrime (Dec 17, 2010)

I stumbled across something interesting that I seem to do every now and then, when I meet someone interesting enough for this happen. I guess one could call this other person someone I like. Repeated and multiple interactions with this person will trigger a sort of passive assimilation of their mental state, personality, mannerisms...on some level maybe even values and ways of thinking that to me seem interesting/valuable.

Its subtle and passive and the odd part that the assimilation isn't a copy of these things. Its more like I take it and change it into something similar but not really the same as I saw it in them...all this passively.
*
 is this related to Fe or is this what it means to be "emotivist"?* Anyone relate?

For example this can happen with fictional characters as well and it happens a lot during a romantic relationship. Maybe its some parts empathy or the side effect of it?

There are parts of me that did not exist prior to *insert example* romantic relationship and they came into existence / I evolved as a person through the interaction. Its me, it isn't her, yet it came from her and became me.

*confused*

^^ I don't know how to explain it without sounding creepy :S.


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## MNiS (Jan 30, 2010)

Copycat.


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## LibertyPrime (Dec 17, 2010)

MNiS said:


> Copycat.


Hmm, yeah, but it doesn't happen with anyone. I'm indifferent to most people I meet and this will not happen...then I meet someone and she/he changes me in substantial ways without trying to.

Its sort of like I get contaminated by them in a good way? So far it has led to many positive changes in my life...hmm.


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## Entropic (Jun 15, 2012)

Sounds more emotivist.


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## MNiS (Jan 30, 2010)

FreeBeer said:


> Hmm, yeah, but it doesn't happen with anyone. I'm indifferent to most people I meet and this will not happen...then I meet someone and she/he changes me in substantial ways without trying to.
> 
> Its sort of like I get contaminated by them in a good way? So far it has led to many positive changes in my life...hmm.


Yeah, I know what you're talking about and it certainly is Fe and/or emotivism. It's more pronounced among Alpha emotivists as I find that SEI and LII sort of mirror others than they find admirable. It's kind of humorous if you've ever noticed it. Although, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, after all.

As for myself, I try *not* to do what you do simply because in my social circles being unique without 'biting' off of others was considered amiable and imitating others wasn't really something to be done. I try to do things my own way although if I like a person I may adopt a few of the person in question's mannerisms and singular ways of thinking. No more than that though as I like being distinctly my own person.


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## LibertyPrime (Dec 17, 2010)

MNiS said:


> Yeah, I know what you're talking about and it certainly is Fe and/or emotivism. It's more pronounced among Alpha emotivists as I find that SEI and LII sort of mirror others than they find admirable. It's kind of humorous if you've ever noticed it. Although, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, after all.
> 
> As for myself, I try *not* to do what you do simply because in my social circles being unique without 'biting' off of others was considered amiable and imitating others wasn't really something to be done. I try to do things my own way although if I like a person I may adopt a few of the person in question's mannerisms and singular ways of thinking. No more than that though as I like being distinctly my own person.


Hmm I'm not exactly talking about copying what others do or how they dress, crap this is difficult to express properly.

For example you meet an ENTJ and you start enjoying his Te-ish way of thinking..before you know it a new part of you is developing and you start thinking in that Te-ish way, but you don't imitate his thoughts because they are your thoughts and you may even disagree with said ENTJ on the same issue because how you apply Te differs from them, yet its similar. I*ts them contaminating you and you contaminating the contamination, which then evolves into a new part of you.*

My point was and is that the assimilation is not a complete copy, but a separate mutation of what has been observed as likable. In this sense it isn't really just copying. I don't actively try to be anything other then myself....*and idk if its because of my 4 fix but being told I copy others feels like an insult.*


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## MNiS (Jan 30, 2010)

FreeBeer said:


> Hmm I'm not exactly talking about copying what others do or how they dress, crap this is difficult to express properly.
> 
> For example you meet an ENTJ and you start enjoying his Te-ish way of thinking..before you know it a new part of you is developing and you start thinking in that Te-ish way, but you don't imitate his thoughts because they are your thoughts and you may even disagree with said ENTJ on the same issue because how you apply Te differs from them, yet its similar. I*ts them contaminating you and you contaminating the contamination, which then evolves into a new part of you.*
> 
> My point was and is that the assimilation is not a complete copy, but a separate mutation of what has been observed as likable. In this sense it isn't really just copying. I don't actively try to be anything other then myself....*and idk if its because of my 4 fix but being told I copy others feels like an insult.*


Yes, I believe that's otherwise known as being impressionable. If you find it beneficial to who you are as a person, great. I find that being unique or sufficiently different as to not seeming to find inspiration from others is better for me.


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## zinnia (Jul 22, 2013)

I'm wondering if we've experienced the same thing.

I have this tendency to... ugh, it's definitely not copying, but let's say I am with one of those people I admire or whatever, and we're watching a movie together. They think it's dumb because it doesn't make any sense; I may find myself agreeing though I'd never noticed before.

And after that, with or without them, I find myself evaluating other movies I watch in the same way - ha that makes no sense, that's so dumb!

Then I realize I was adopting their thinking, but I make it my own, I guess.


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## babblingbrook (Aug 10, 2009)

This is simply called empathy in my opinion, the power of understanding and imaginatively entering into other people's feelings.

I totally relate to what you said and can become very creepy in my empathy towards some people. To me it feels normal, to others it might be a bit much.


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## Word Dispenser (May 18, 2012)

I was a real copycat when I was a kid... Followed everyone around. 

Sniff.

Nobody wanted to play with me and be my friend. :crying:


Ahem, anywho. I think I associate this mingling of self with otherness as being kinda.. 9ish behaviour. I really take on a lot from other people-- Particularly if they're people I really admire and respect. roud:


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## d e c a d e n t (Apr 21, 2013)

@_FreeBeer_
Huh, that sounds interesting. I'm not sure if I've found myself thinking that way, but maybe to some degree... I mean, I might consider a friend's thoughts but not in the way you describe, as far as I am aware.

Although if you like someone's way of thinking, it doesn't sound too strange to take some of it inside yourself.


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## Gossip Goat (Nov 19, 2013)

FreeBeer said:


> I stumbled across something interesting that I seem to do every now and then, when I meet someone interesting enough for this happen. I guess one could call this other person someone I like. Repeated and multiple interactions with this person will trigger a sort of passive assimilation of their mental state, personality, mannerisms...on some level maybe even values and ways of thinking that to me seem interesting/valuable.
> 
> Its subtle and passive and the odd part that the assimilation isn't a copy of these things. Its more like I take it and change it into something similar but not really the same as I saw it in them...all this passively.
> *
> ...


If I find someone interesting enough I pretty much try to become them. Like a Type 4 in the end I'm searching for a identity.


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## Sol_ (Jan 8, 2013)

Empathy is normal. This makes us humans and gives possibility to love others, to feel other and self a part of one. F types better conscious this process. Also empathy helps to activate in other man a trust to you, what is important for joint actions, and also it helps to make other man acting as you want - empathy is a both-sides process.


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## Karma Butterfly (Jul 15, 2013)

FreeBeer said:


> I stumbled across something interesting that I seem to do every now and then, when I meet someone interesting enough for this happen. I guess one could call this other person someone I like. Repeated and multiple interactions with this person will trigger a sort of passive assimilation of their mental state, personality, mannerisms...on some level maybe even values and ways of thinking that to me seem interesting/valuable.
> 
> Its subtle and passive and the odd part that the assimilation isn't a copy of these things. Its more like I take it and change it into something similar but not really the same as I saw it in them...all this passively.
> *
> ...


It is indeed because you're an empathic emotivist. IEEs are the most prone to experience this too. I wouldn't say it's copying per se, but _emulating_.

It was a dead giveaway I couldn't be this type, since it's such a prevalent trait which I simply never had.



FreeBeer said:


> My point was and is that the assimilation is not a complete copy, but a separate mutation of what has been observed as likable. In this sense it isn't really just copying. I don't actively try to be anything other then myself....*and idk if its because of my 4 fix but being told I copy others feels like an insult.*


No need to feel insulted since you're not guilty of such thing.


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## Nico1e (Jul 27, 2011)

I don't normally go to any online forums much anymore, but tonight is one of those nights when I am digging around through this place, and I will probably vanish for months again afterwards. Anyway, I do the same thing about becoming interested in someone and wanting to learn about everything they're interested in, the type of music they like, the town they grew up in, their religion, everything, even if it was something I wasn't originally interested in, or something I originally disagreed with. I have to be attracted to the person in order for it to happen, and they have to let me get to know them enough that I can gather enough information about them. It can sometimes have a major impact on my life which lasts for years. However, sometimes it can be painful or traumatic - I 'merged' with someone who was, to say the least, 'mentally ill,' a long time ago, and it made me feel this horrible, traumatized feeling, as though all of the world was hopeless and everything everywhere was dead. I think I myself might possibly have given that feeling to somebody else not too long ago, too, but I'm not sure. 

Sometimes this process dead-ends. For instance, several years ago I was attracted to a guy who liked the New York Yankees, and going to baseball games was a big part of his life. I don't watch sports, but I tried, briefly, to at least tolerate the idea of going to baseball games and liking the Yankees. I tried to relate to that somehow. But it just did not resonate with me. I never did get into a relationship with that particular person, it was just a crush that ended. No matter how hard I tried, I could not love baseball and Yankees along with him.


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## tangosthenes (Oct 29, 2011)

edit: err, nvm


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## Entropic (Jun 15, 2012)

As an interesting contrast I think duality can cause this too. Amaterasu and I have in ways almost become our opposites where I am now more similar to how she used to be and she's more similar to how to how I used to be. I think it's healthy though, as I have never felt this connected to Se before and it's definitely more assuring as a feeling.

You might also be interested to look into the science of mirror neurons.


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