# Women, are you aroused by other women?



## Fizz

And then Nevermore takes away my thunder. But yes, the "eloquence" as mrniceftw puts it, and elegance as he means has function. 

Big breasts and wide hips are signs of fertility. It's not like your average man looks at a busty woman and goes, "Oh hot damn, I bet she could feed my offspring with those melons!" or look at a plump rear and think, "I bet she would have no trouble bearing my my child. It could cartwheel out of those hips!".


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## nevermore

mrniceftw said:


> LMAO yeah can't believe I did that not sure what I was thinking when I typed that (obviously wasn't). I changed it. Thanks.


LOL, np.:wink: I'm an INTP so I found it hard to resist!:laughing:


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## nevermore

Fizz said:


> "Oh hot damn, I bet she could feed my offspring with those melons!"


:laughing::crazy:


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## Eerie

I think that genitalia in general was not meant to be that attractive... because it's not. On some people yes.. but most ? nope.


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## Fizz

sleepinghyacinth said:


> I think that genitalia in general was not meant to be that attractive... because it's not. On some people yes.. but most ? nope.


The lips on the face resemble the female genitalia, there's some connection there. I don't think genitals look "ugly". They look the way they do because of function. You could say there's an obsession with the penis because of all the phallic imagery of _man made_ structures.


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## Eerie

Eh - I'm not attracted to the genitalia though, you know what I mean? It's the person.


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## Fizz

sleepinghyacinth said:


> Eh - I'm not attracted to the genitalia though, you know what I mean? It's the person.


Well yeah :laughing: I don't date people like that.

"Your personality is abominable, your face is ugly, but your genitals, beautiful, let's make this work."


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## Eerie

hahahahahaha!


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## Hokahey

Fizz said:


> Well yeah :laughing: I don't date people like that.
> 
> "Your personality is abominable, your face is ugly, but your genitals, beautiful, let's make this work."


Paper bag and ear plugs would do the trick. :wink:


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## Fizz

mrniceftw said:


> Paper bag and ear plugs would do the trick. :wink:


I'd gag them before I'd wear earplugs. Don't want the slightest chance of the plugs falling out and hearing them talk.


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## Eerie

Ooooo.... gags.....


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## Crystall

Sanskrit said:


> I see that your disagreement comes from the standpoint of defined age groups which I left out solely on the basis of individual development not following a set timetables in books. When your kid asks you a question you are not to tell them to shut up and tell them to ask again in x number of years.
> And knowledge is the one thing nobody needs protection from but from the lack of it.
> 
> 
> And did I instruct there anywhere anyone to rent the worst of Japanese scat-bondage and show it to your kid when they ask why boys have a weenie and girls don't? No I am sure that can not be detected there anywhere in my post or anything of the like, you are here just climbing the walls of "pullitouttayourass" and throwing big bricks of assumptions around.
> 
> The sort of innocence you speak of is on the par of teaching children abstinence only until they reach 20. And your Dr Phil book that you stash under a bible sure as hell does not account for the inquisitive mind of child. Sure you don't need to go and unload entire subject of SEX in one seating to your kid but you are so terribly wrong yourself if you think that less they know the happier they are.
> Having a certain level of prior knowledge of sexual development in terms and words safe for children will help them better to process and cope with the maturing of their bodies. Nothing beats the horrific surprise of your first wet dream if you had no clue it can happen.
> 
> And information does not make children "grow too fast" A child grows at the rate their brains can absorb information, they play the games they play whether they know or not the anatomy and functions of their private parts. Children absorb ten times more horrifying things just by observing parents arguing or during one single commercial break on TV.
> Specifics of sex and other related issues are issued when conversations involve them naturally. I also did not tell anyone to go out their way to explain entire process of intercourse to their child all the way to inception and pregnancy at the first moment. These kind of issues are not to be treated as hot potato or a bucket of cold water. moderation and rational thought is of course necessary and you just having that overblown dramatic reaction shows that you do not clearly possess adequate maturity to moderate even yourself. Parenting is not just about knowing your way around few books but understanding and controlling yourself.
> And most importantly: understanding you are not perfect, nor the best, so what ever you do or say needs a critical thought and evaluation *beforehand.*


You're right. Like I said, the maternal instincts in me took over and I went into raging lioness - protecting - the - cubs - mode. I realize now that I made wrongful assumptions about your views and overreacted, and I'm sorry. 

Now I won't steer off topic again, promise!


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## Kr3m1in

What the hell are children doing in this thread?...
I am totally and completely aroused by other women, provided they are attractive of course.
I think a man with a nice body looks good, attractive. It used to be that I could get aroused from the way a man looks. But all the sex I've had with men has been oh so boring. And too quick. And just kind of...felt like doing it to do it.
So, eventually I stopped experimenting with that and stuck with what I like.


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## Kr3m1in

Thank you Fizz, for always being there to thank my posts. I am greatly aroused by that


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## Peripheral

mars6988 said:


> What the hell are children doing in this thread?...
> I am totally and completely aroused by other women, provided they are attractive of course.
> I think a man with a nice body looks good, attractive. It used to be that I could get aroused from the way a man looks. But all the sex I've had with men has been oh so boring. And too quick. And just kind of...felt like doing it to do it.
> So, eventually I stopped experimenting with that and stuck with what I like.


That's tragic, man. Did you ever tell them what to do?


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## Kr3m1in

Tell men what to do? Yeah, I've tried.
Some were better than others, but all boring, when it comes down to it. Boring to me... probably not objectively boring.
When I tried oral sex with a man I finally was like...ok...I am way too gay to have this thing in my mouth...this is absurd and hilarious.

So...yes...aroused by other women


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## Eerie

Peripheral said:


> That's tragic, man. Did you ever tell them what to do?



That is usually so futile .... lol


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## Kr3m1in

@Eerie , i second

That's also unsexy... you're not gonna lay there and be like...make a sharp right at this light, baby boy)))
especially if it's not even about the poor chap that it's boring.


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## Eerie

If I have to spend the entire time I am in bed with someone throwing around suggestions as to how to make things feel good, I will quickly fall out of the mood and get bored. I understand that communication is important, but sometimes it ruins the freaking mood to have to be someone's teacher.


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## nevermore

mars6988 said:


> @Eerie , i second
> 
> That's also unsexy... you're not gonna lay there and be like...make a sharp right at this light, baby boy)))
> especially if it's not even about the poor chap that it's boring.


See, this is what God didn't think of when he invented heterosexuality...


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## Kr3m1in

I am distracted. Truthfully, I can't ever pick who to think about. And keep changing it, like every second. I can't just think about one person. Don't know why)
It is kind of funny...but that's why. I know exactly what to do.

@Slider because female orgasms are the best thing to ever happen to the world.


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## Fizz

mars6988 said:


> I am distracted. Truthfully, I can't ever pick who to think about. And keep changing it, like every second. I can't just think about one person. Don't know why)
> It is kind of funny...but that's why. I know exactly what to do.


I usually stick with one person but if it gets boring I switch to others. Usually actors/actresses or made up conglomeration of characteristics that I find attractive.


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## Kr3m1in

I do that too. Well there are only like...3 actresses I do. And then the rest are real people I've had/have. But i change them and their positions in my head so much that it distracts me. So...yeah..it takes forever, so I rarely ever do it. SO much easier with the real thing..


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## Eerie

I don't know what it is, it's been that way for me ever since I started having orgasms. It's just really hard to accomplish. Sometimes it just doesn't feel good, like I feel nothing at all, other times it takes too long and I'm sore so I just give up.


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## Kr3m1in

@Eerie my ex was like that. but we were stubborn and made it a point to get her at least one every day and since then it's been way easier for her.


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## nevermore

mars6988 said:


> I do that too. Well there are only like...3 actresses I do. And then the rest are real people I've had/have. But i change them and their positions in my head so much that it distracts me. So...yeah..it takes forever, so I rarely ever do it. SO much easier with the real thing..


I'm a bit like you. I never fantasize about actors or actresses, or at least rarely. It's usually people I know or have seen, or an idealized person/mish-mash of people (I don't look at porn much).


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## Fizz

mars6988 said:


> @Eerie my ex was like that. but we were stubborn and made it a point to get her at least one every day and since then it's been way easier for her.


I've actually heard that women who masturbate to orgasm more often find it easier and easier to do so. I know that if I haven't in a while it makes it that much harder. That's just me though, doesn't mean it works like that for everyone.


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## Eerie

I don't masturbate that often, I usually find it a big waste of 45 minutes.


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## Fizz

Eerie said:


> I don't masturbate that often, I usually find it a big waste of 45 minutes.


You've timed yourself?

-----

Have there been any threads just about orgasms yet?


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## Eerie

I've noticed what time i started and what time it was when I gave up, yeah. 

I live with a four year old, I only even have certain "times" i can do anything


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## Fizz

Eerie said:


> I've noticed what time i started and what time it was when I gave up, yeah.
> 
> *I live with a four year old*, I only even have certain "times" i can do anything


Yeah, that would make a difference. Under 10 minutes usually, if it's more, it's only because I can.


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## Eerie

I wish it would take that long, lol, but honestly, half the time the orgasms don't even feel good and my arms hurt like a mofo, so it just doesn't seem worth it.


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## Hokahey

I'm male and I can give myself multiple orgasms and have had them during sex as well. I had (at least it was told to me) given multiple orgasms to my ex. She may have been lying, who knows but honestly why lie about this? Why is there a feeling of needing to lie? If you didn't have a orgasm why say you did? For women it seems (again not much experience on my part) harder to understand if it "actually" happened for them, I mean I can suspect judging by her expressions and how flushed her face is sometimes, but can't be 100% because I'm simply not her, so a lot of times I would talk to her about it, that way I can improve next time. So in conclusion based on our time together I think I made her orgasm a decent amount, definitely not all the time though, but I always tried to improve and switch things up. Also not trying to toot my own horn here. Just adding the discussion about me being male and having multiple orgasms, which honestly are great but do kinda wear me down more obviously than a single.


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## nevermore

mrniceftw said:


> I'm male and I can give myself multiple orgasms and have had them during sex as well. I had (at least it was told to me) given multiple orgasms to my ex. She may have been lying, who knows but honestly why lie about this? Why is there a feeling of needing to lie? If you didn't have a orgasm why say you did? For women it seems (again not much experience on my part) harder to understand if it "actually" happened for them, I mean I can suspect judging by her expressions and how flushed her face is sometimes, but can't be 100% because I'm simply not her, so a lot of times I would talk to her about it, that way I can improve next time. So in conclusion based on our time together I think I made her orgasm a decent amount, definitely not all the time though, but I always tried to improve and switch things up. Also not trying to toot my own horn here. Just adding the discussion about me being male and having multiple orgasms, which honestly are great but do kinda wear me down more obviously than a single.


Maybe we should start our own thread? Seems like the ladies are sort of having their own discussion here now.


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## Hokahey

nevermore said:


> Maybe we should start our own thread? Seems like the ladies are sort of having their own discussion here now.


Nah, it's good to have open communication of the sexes about orgasms, that's how you can be intrigued or know things that you never knew.


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## nevermore

mrniceftw said:


> Nah, it's good to have open communication of the sexes about orgasms, that's how you can be intrigued or know things that you never knew.


I know, just seemed as if they were implying they wanted it to be a ladies only thing, since they were mostly responding to other women's comments. Maybe I'm just taking things too personally (my inferior Fe acts up a lot :/). I developed the ability to do this early because for some reason when I was like 12 I had this aversion to jacking off (no idea why...OCD or something) and got in the habit of holding it in.


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## Kr3m1in

@Eerie probably has serious arm muscles)))


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## nevermore

^^ This being my case in point, @mrniceftw :laughing:


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## Fizz

nevermore said:


> I know, just seemed as if they were implying they wanted it to be a ladies only thing, since they were mostly responding to other women's comments. Maybe I'm just taking things too personally (my inferior Fe acts up a lot :/). I developed the ability to do this early because for some reason when I was like 12 I had this aversion to jacking off (no idea why...OCD or something) and got in the habit of holding it in.


Nooo! Stay! I admire your contributions, but really this is off the main topic altogether.


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## Hokahey

nevermore said:


> ^^ This being my case in point, @mrniceftw :laughing:


Well just because I added to the conversation doesn't mean I require anyone to respond to what I said. :tongue:


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## Fizz

@nevermore
@mrniceftw
@Eerie
@mars6988

I made a thread.

http://personalitycafe.com/sex-relationships/46996-orgasms.html


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## Eerie

I'd comment it but that would be so redundant  I feel like now everyone on perc knows my issues already, LOL


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## Fizz

Eerie said:


> I'd comment it but that would be so redundant  I feel like now everyone on perc knows my issues already, LOL


Well, if anyone says something interesting I'm sure you can contribute something? :laughing: PerC needs to know more of your information, we are insatiable.


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## Trainwreck

Kareno said:


> Finally! I've always wondered about this. I can definitely see when a woman is arousing, and I find myself watching an attractive girl just as much as guys sometimes. I always thought maybe I was just a little off in the head or confused about sex because I've never been attracted to a woman. I've had a lot of lesbian friends and have openly wondered whether I might be one myself, but there's just no pull for me there. So while I see that a woman is beautiful, that doesn't make me want to do anything about it.
> 
> When I see that a man is attractive, it definitely has a pull. With men as opposed to with women, what arouses me more than their appearance is their behavior - being confident, taking charge, and being a little pushy with touch and personal space. Basically any masculine behavior can be attractive in a primitive way, even if the lady doth protest to sexism and rudeness. Look at most romances: the woman is sexy, and the man grabs her and kisses her without so much as a by your leave. It's the action that's romantic in a man. At least, that's what I think.
> 
> *I think asking men if they're attracted to men might not bring out honest responses, because our culture is still extremely homophobic on the male side. Homosexual women are almost glorified, but I've even seen it here on the forums when men say something sweet to another man they'll immediately add "no ****!" As if someone's going to rush out of the bushes and immediately start pointing fingers or the other man's going to attack them with affection. XD*


Yeah, I think it gets a little ridiculous. I mean in college I ran with a group of guys who were best described as the cast of a Jackass movie but smarter, and drunker. So I've kissed plenty of my male friends, cuddled, and even shared beds on multiple occasions with spooning -- the one house we lived in didn't have any heat for like a month, and because of that we didn't have to pay rent . All of the "gay stuff" was pretty much drunk guy love, completely plutonic guy love, absolutely nothing wrong with that. And sharing beds with guys comes simply from a lack of couches to sleep on, and for a time there, literally it was done for warmth (the north mid west in January isn't warm).

I don't consider myself to be homosexual but there are certainly male physiques I can appreciate. If I did ever feel anything sexual, I have a feeling it would just be the fact that I sort of get off on things that are considered taboo. I mean if I can spoon with a man for eight hours and not get an erection from it, even with the risk of a heterosexual sex dream triggering some seriously awkward morning wood, then I think it's safe to say I would know whether or not I'm gay.


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## nevermore

Trainwreck said:


> Yeah, I think it gets a little ridiculous. I mean in college I ran with a group of guys who were best described as the cast of a Jackass movie but smarter, and drunker. So I've kissed plenty of my male friends, cuddled, and even shared beds on multiple occasions with spooning -- the one house we lived in didn't have any heat for like a month, and because of that we didn't have to pay rent . All of the "gay stuff" was pretty much drunk guy love, completely plutonic guy love, absolutely nothing wrong with that. And sharing beds with guys comes simply from a lack of couches to sleep on, and for a time there, literally it was done for warmth (the north mid west in January isn't warm).
> 
> I don't consider myself to be homosexual but there are certainly male physiques I can appreciate. If I did ever feel anything sexual, I have a feeling it would just be the fact that I sort of get off on things that are considered taboo. I mean if I can spoon with a man for eight hours and not get an erection from it, even with the risk of a heterosexual sex dream triggering some seriously awkward morning wood, then I think it's safe to say I would know whether or not I'm gay.


I'd rather be in your position than mine, which was basically having to live in a small room with a (very attractive) male roommate and try not to draw attention to yourself. (His friends, who he frequently had over, were extremely attractive as well, but unlike him they usually kept their clothes on).

(Actually, he was completely aware I fancied him, but since he knew I felt guilty about it he was too sensitive to mention it. Most awkward living arrangement ever.)


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## Sanskrit

Trainwreck said:


> Yeah, I think it gets a little ridiculous. I mean in college I ran with a group of guys who were best described as the cast of a Jackass movie but smarter, and drunker. So I've kissed plenty of my male friends, cuddled, and even shared beds on multiple occasions with spooning -- the one house we lived in didn't have any heat for like a month, and because of that we didn't have to pay rent . All of the "gay stuff" was pretty much drunk guy love, completely *platonic* guy love, absolutely nothing wrong with that. And sharing beds with guys comes simply from a lack of couches to sleep on, and for a time there, literally it was done for warmth (the north mid west in January isn't warm).
> 
> I don't consider myself to be homosexual but there are certainly male physiques I can appreciate. If I did ever feel anything sexual, I have a feeling it would just be the fact that I sort of get off on things that are considered taboo. I mean if I can spoon with a man for eight hours and not get an erection from it, even with the risk of a heterosexual sex dream triggering some seriously awkward morning wood, then I think it's safe to say I would know whether or not I'm gay.


I also am of heterosexual persuasion but in military service I has to sleep in a man-pile during our winter training on a flatbed to keep warm. It gets really freaking cold and last thing in your mind in that smelly situation of farts and grunts is sex. And if something gets "gay" it is the shared showers with 20 immature guys. It taught me to ignore facepalm reaction, just to get things done.

But same time some of my best friends are homosexual men with whom I hang out and even sometimes allow them to talk me into going clubbing. There's just something more honest and less pretentious about a guy who doesn't try to mask his affection to you in fear of appearing gay. They actually dare to act themselves around me instead of pulling off macho complex and discussing man-topics. We can actually talk about literature, classical music, art and other issues not pertaining guns and cars.

This freedom allows me to also express my affection to them as my friends and converse about issues that are not stereotype male interest like what sort of facial cream or aftershave is good for my skintype. Or how to best color coordinate my clothes and make yellow shirt match with a black suit (The trick is golden buttons and a collar pin plus big copper or bronze belt buckle Also using either dark blue or gray tie if you wear a tie. Tie pin also must then be golden or have golden details like bars or embroidery)

I like yellow, blue and red / gray mixes. But that's enough about fashion.

On the topic: Sometimes I do feel minor attraction to my gay buddy because we've shared so much but i don't know if that is just bromance. I do know that the level of familiarity is a factor.


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## Trainwreck

Sanskrit said:


> I also am of heterosexual persuasion but in military service I has to sleep in a man-pile during our winter training on a flatbed to keep warm. It gets really freaking cold and last thing in your mind in that smelly situation of farts and grunts is sex. *And if something gets "gay" it is the shared showers with 20 immature guys. It taught me to ignore facepalm reaction, just to get things done.
> *
> But same time some of my best friends are homosexual men with whom I hang out and even sometimes allow them to talk me into going clubbing. There's just something more honest and less pretentious about a guy who doesn't try to mask his affection to you in fear of appearing gay. They actually dare to act themselves around me instead of pulling off macho complex and discussing man-topics. We can actually talk about literature, classical music, art and other issues not pertaining guns and cars.
> 
> This freedom allows me to also express my affection to them as my friends and converse about issues that are not stereotype male interest like what sort of facial cream or aftershave is good for my skintype. Or how to best color coordinate my clothes and make yellow shirt match with a black suit (The trick is golden buttons and a collar pin plus big copper or bronze belt buckle Also using either dark blue or gray tie if you wear a tie. Tie pin also must then be golden or have golden details like bars or embroidery)
> 
> I like yellow, blue and red / gray mixes. But that's enough about fashion.
> 
> On the topic: Sometimes I do feel minor attraction to my gay buddy because we've shared so much but i don't know if that is just bromance. I do know that the level of familiarity is a factor.


Haha, I can only imagine. Some of the things that took place in the showers after football practice in highschool, let's just say that I've seen more "man-ginas" "goats" "brains" and "bat wings" than I could ever care too, and that's just the reeeeeeeeeeallly tame stuff. I'm utterly convinced that it takes on average only about 15 minutes for a group of 16-22 year old guys to de-evolve into a troop of apes.


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## Lycrester

I don't know if I'm actually aroused by other women but I do like cleavage for some reason...


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## Hokahey

Oh, boy I'm gonna hear it for this comment: 

Maybe women are just too darn impressed with themselves. 
"Vanity, definitely my favorite sin." - Al Pacino from (The Devils Advocate)

Haha......I am only kidding btw.


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## skycloud86

mrniceftw said:


> Oh, boy I'm gonna hear it for this comment:
> 
> Maybe women are just too darn impressed with themselves.
> "Vanity, definitely my favorite sin." - Al Pacino from (The Devils Advocate)
> 
> Haha......I am only kidding btw.


Whilst we know that you are kidding, women are often only vain because that is how society and the media has made them.


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## Elsewhere1

Yes, 

women are beautiful. How could you not be aroused by women?


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## Kr3m1in

Immensely...


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## dejavu

Yes, a bit.

But I don't want to touch them or have a relationship with them, so that is how I know I'm not a lesbian. :tongue:


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## snail

No, I don't seem to be able to feel sexual attraction toward females, however I did once have an attraction to a trans man who still had a vagina. 

I tend to have a preference for feminine personality traits in males, and find psychological androgyny socially appealing regardless of physical sex. 

Also, a man can (and frequently does) turn me on without an erection, without meaning to, while giving no direct sexual cues.


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## Fizz

Kr3m1in said:


> Immensely...


This is news to me! :shocked:


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## Cubie

*I'm a woman and i find women very attractive. It's not something I'm ashamed of, It's just i don't tell a lot of people because they get the wrong idea. Women do arouse me but its not all about that, To me it's more about the feeling i get when I'm with women, i love the way they make me happy and the way i feel when I'm with them. They make me feel confident and i always wanna be with women when i see one I'm attracted to.*


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## skycloud86

Elsewhere1 said:


> Yes,
> 
> women are beautiful. How could you not be aroused by women?


You could be a gay male or straight female. Or asexual.


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## Kr3m1in

@skycloud86 this is a thread for women.
I think the OP is asking women if they are aroused.
I don't think you're understanding the question correctly, to be fair.


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## skycloud86

Kr3m1in said:


> @skycloud86 this is a thread for women.
> I think the OP is asking women if they are aroused.
> I don't think you're understanding the question correctly, to be fair.


Alternative tangents and interpretations.


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## Elsewhere1

@_Kr3m1in_ 

Thanks girly:wink:


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## Fizz

Kr3m1in said:


> @skycloud86 this is a thread for women.
> I think the OP is asking women if they are aroused.
> I don't think you're understanding the question correctly, to be fair.


To be fair as well, Skycloud was answering a question posed by another member as this thread isn't too exclusive already. It's honest and gets to the point.

It would be like asking, "Who doesn't LOVE ice cream?" - and just assuming everyone loves ice cream. When obviously not everyone likes ice cream and some are lactose intolerant.


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## Hokahey

Fizz said:


> To be fair as well, Skycloud was answering a question posed by another member as this thread isn't too exclusive already. It's honest and gets to the point.
> 
> It would be like asking, "Who doesn't LOVE ice cream?" - and just assuming everyone loves ice cream. When obviously not everyone likes ice cream and some are lactose intolerant.


Also to be fair to @skycloud86 there actually was other posters asking for male opinions in this thread asking about what males think of the same issue.


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## Michael82

aroused by men...hmmmm...

I think I could be. But perhaps it would be kind of artificial. I just have an urge to fuck women, not men. Sorry no hard feelings.


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## dagnytaggart

haha, yes. I was wondering if this made me bi.


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## Kr3m1in

Mojo Jojo said:


> haha, yes. I was wondering if this made me bi.


Only if you've acted on that desire and loved it.


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## Elsewhere1

@Kr3m1in

What if you have acted on it and loved it but your preference is for men? Lol


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## skycloud86

Elsewhere1 said:


> @Kr3m1in
> 
> What if you have acted on it and loved it but your preference is for men? Lol


Then that person would be bisexual, at least incidentally.


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## Kr3m1in

Elsewhere, that means you acted on it with the wrong woman.


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## devoid

I've acted on it and realized it was a terrible mistake. xD I don't think that makes me bisexual.


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## Peacock

I can be physically attracted to a woman, but I honestly don't like vagina's.
I fooled around with a girl at a very young age, it's just not my thing. (seven or so....)
All my coworkers find it a bit weird when I tell them there's a hot chick in the restaurant, though.


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## devoid

Peacock said:


> I can be physically attracted to a woman, but I honestly don't like vagina's.
> I fooled around with a girl at a very young age, it's just not my thing. (seven or so....)
> All my coworkers find it a bit weird when I tell them there's a hot chick in the restaurant, though.


For some reason I thought that was adorable (I guess most people would think 7 year olds doing that is weird, but it's a normal part of childhood development, so eh). Much better than my nasty experience at 14...


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## tuna

yes, I am.



hziegel said:


> For some reason I thought that was adorable (I guess most people would think 7 year olds doing that is weird, but it's a normal part of childhood development, so eh). Much better than my nasty experience at 14...


 I'm sorry you had a bad experience, especially when you were that young. <333


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## NekoNinja

hziegel said:


> Men, if you feel like posting, do you ever find other men attractive or arousing?


I do find some men to be a bit attractive. But not as much really as women. For me there is something about smooth skin that is just arousing in general. I am a straight male btw. I think it's almost hard not to find the female figure attractive. Curves are always sexy I think no matter the gender. I mean women like smooth muscular men, and all them muscles makes a lot of curves and shape. :laughing:

But one reason I might find some men attractive is because I am submissive instead of dominant. (I wonder if submission/dominance might have anything to do with personality types...?)

Ahh >.> I feel kinda weird after this post....


----------



## devoid

NekoNinja said:


> I do find some men to be a bit attractive. But not as much really as women. For me there is something about smooth skin that is just arousing in general. I am a straight male btw. I think it's almost hard not to find the female figure attractive. Curves are always sexy I think no matter the gender. I mean women like smooth muscular men, and all them muscles makes a lot of curves and shape. :laughing:
> 
> But one reason I might find some men attractive is because I am submissive instead of dominant. (I wonder if submission/dominance might have anything to do with personality types...?)
> 
> Ahh >.> I feel kinda weird after this post....


There's nothing to feel weird about. I'm glad you're comfortable enough with yourself to say so. 

It could actually be a hormonal thing. High estrogen levels could make you more likely to feel submissive, which could also explain why you would find a dominating figure attractive regardless of sex. Unlike homosexuals, men who have high estrogen levels are not naturally attracted to testosterone.


----------



## NekoNinja

hziegel said:


> There's nothing to feel weird about. I'm glad you're comfortable enough with yourself to say so.
> 
> It could actually be a hormonal thing. High estrogen levels could make you more likely to feel submissive, which could also explain why you would find a dominating figure attractive regardless of sex. Unlike homosexuals, men who have high estrogen levels are not naturally attracted to testosterone.


Well actually I was at first going to say perv instead of weird but I decided to change it. :tongue: I suppose the word I was looking for may have been awkward. 

It could possibly be a hormonal thing. I've never thought of that. I'm not too worried about being submissive as I've read articles on it in the past, and there are a small percentage of men who are. It is quite interesting that you point this out though, because as I have posted in the past, people generally tend to think I'm a girl online (and yes I know this is partly because of my avatar and such but it has happened on different sites too), and in real life people tend to think I'm gay (mostly from friends and family.) My parents themselves have came outright and asked me on several occasions. Talk about an awkward conversation... :dry: The hormone levels thing could probably explain why I seem so feminine and put off this "vibe."


----------



## nevermore

NekoNinja said:


> But one reason I might find some men attractive is because I am submissive instead of dominant.


This is definitely part of it for me...


----------



## The Unseen

Negative. I'm strictly dickly.


----------



## FXGZ

A hot naked male body, doesn't matter how hot it is, doesn't turn me on at all. 

BUT a naked female body turns me on a great deal. A picture of a nice looking vagina turns me on like nothing else can. Seconded by nice boobies. I have this fantasy of parting the lips of her vagina with my fingers and flirting with her clits with my fingers (but it has to be clean and shaved or landing strip). Okay I am wet lol. It is all and the only thing in my head ever since I hit puberty. 

I have never been with a girl though, and never fell in love with a girl either. Dated many guys, fucked some. My ex-bf gave me the best sex ever, and it is probably because of him I have developed some appreciation for a male body, but not nearly as much as the way a female body does for me. I get turned on (like wet) watching my girlfriend changing clothes when we go shopping! 

I guess I am straight, but for some reason female bodies turn me instead of male bodies.


----------



## sparkles

The female form is more balanced aesthetically, with each side roughly matching the other side. The male form isn't like that. Might be one reason the female form seems more attractive. I'm not exactly straight but I've never had a more-than-physical relationship with a woman. I find women's bodies highly sexy. With men, it is more about personality and what they do than how their body looks, though I do prefer signs of health.


----------



## Unicorntopia

FXGZ said:


> A hot naked male body, doesn't matter how hot it is, doesn't turn me on at all.
> 
> BUT a naked female body turns me on a great deal. A picture of a nice looking vagina turns me on like nothing else can. Seconded by nice boobies. I have this fantasy of parting the lips of her vagina with my fingers and flirting with her clits with my fingers (but it has to be clean and shaved or landing strip). Okay I am wet lol. It is all and the only thing in my head ever since I hit puberty.
> 
> I have never been with a girl though, and never fell in love with a girl either. Dated many guys, fucked some. My ex-bf gave me the best sex ever, and it is probably because of him I have developed some appreciation for a male body, but not nearly as much as the way a female body does for me. I get turned on (like wet) watching my girlfriend changing clothes when we go shopping!
> 
> I guess I am straight, but for some reason female bodies turn me instead of male bodies.


Don't you feel bad about thinking sexually about your friend and letting yourself get horny by it? I have, ever since elementary school, felt shame for feeling that way. I try to block it out of my mind because if they knew they might feel grossed out or violated. Does she know you feel this way towards her and is ok with it? I guess it would not matter to me if I knew this was the case with the women I am attracted to. I feel like it is disrespectfull to the one you are attracted to, to be attracted to them, when they have not said or expressed they are cool with it. I feel that it is ok to think about them a little when you are not in their vasinity, but I feel like it is wrong if I get horny for them in thier vasinity or when conversing with them. I also get confused at where to draw the line if I am regularly interacting with them or have an established non-romantic relationship with them. 

Is this normal for people to feel & think the way I do, or am I just unessesarily guilt ridden?


----------



## FXGZ

Unicorntopia said:


> Don't you feel bad about thinking sexually about your friend and letting yourself get horny by it? I have, ever since elementary school, felt shame for feeling that way. I try to block it out of my mind because if they knew they might feel grossed out or violated. Does she know you feel this way towards her and is ok with it? I guess it would not matter to me if I knew this was the case with the women I am attracted to. I feel like it is disrespectfull to the one you are attracted to, to be attracted to them, when they have not said or expressed they are cool with it. I feel that it is ok to think about them a little when you are not in their vasinity, but I feel like it is wrong if I get horny for them in thier vasinity or when conversing with them. I also get confused at where to draw the line if I am regularly interacting with them or have an established non-romantic relationship with them.
> 
> Is this normal for people to feel & think the way I do, or am I just unessesarily guilt ridden?


I am not attracted to her, I am simply getting turned on by looking at her sexy buttcheeks lol. It could be anyone really, it could be hers, a random stranger;s, or a porn star's body parts. No moral conflict of any sorts, I don't think. 

You are a very moral and guilty conscious person. It is a virtue, although it is a hard one to carry. I share a similar philosophy when the situation is reversed - if someone else that I have no sexual interest in thinks of me that way, I get very very grossed out. It is like you haven't even earned the right to like me yet, go find someone else your own level.


----------



## Unicorntopia

FXGZ said:


> I am not attracted to her, I am simply getting turned on by looking at her sexy buttcheeks lol. It could be anyone really, it could be hers, a random stranger;s, or a porn star's body parts. No moral conflict of any sorts, I don't think.
> 
> You are a very moral and guilty conscious person. It is a virtue, although it is a hard one to carry. I share a similar philosophy when the situation is reversed - if someone else that I have no sexual interest in thinks of me that way, I get very very grossed out. It is like you haven't even earned the right to like me yet, go find someone else your own level.


What is the difference between being attracted to someone and getting wet when you look at them?

But don't you follow the golden rule; do unto others as you would have them do unto you (unless they tell you they prefer something else)? Do you not feel guilt if you don't?


----------



## eburian

I agree that a lot of it might be more emotional bonding. I've only been once sexually attracted to a girl that I had a crush on and even then I'm still confused because it's the only person I've had strong mega intense feelings for. I have physical attractions to girls and yes I want to date them but I guess I still don't know what it means because I don't really understand a lot of my attractions to people at this point in my life whether it's mainly emotional or physical attraction that allows me to become sexually attracted to them. 

That saying, I kinda agree in saying that some girls being attracted to other girls might be for emotional support or the need of in their lives. The girl I fell hard for was extremely needy at that point in her life which might have led her to think she was bicurious. That saying, I do think girls can have emotional attractions and sexual to other women I think it depends on your pull and whether you can also desire that emotional connection with them in that way.


----------



## FXGZ

Unicorntopia said:


> What is the difference between being attracted to someone and getting wet when you look at them?
> 
> But don't you follow the golden rule; do unto others as you would have them do unto you (unless they tell you they prefer something else)? Do you not feel guilt if you don't?



How about I don't give a shit?


----------



## Unicorntopia

FXGZ said:


> How about I don't give a shit?


Ok, I don't know if you thought I was being snotty, or if you are genuine.

I honestly am asking these questions and want to hear your honest anwer because I feel it may shed light on myself. 

It is cool though, and I will accept that answer if it is the truth either way. :tongue:


----------



## NekoNinja

Unicorntopia said:


> What is the difference between being attracted to someone and getting wet when you look at them?
> 
> But don't you follow the golden rule; do unto others as you would have them do unto you (unless they tell you they prefer something else)? Do you not feel guilt if you don't?


I would have to agree. I think there are two types of attraction - physical and mental. As in you can be attracted to the body or attracted to their personality. It is argued that a person's personality is what matters, but when it comes down to it your sexual orientation is decided by what physically attracts you (since a girl and boy can have basically the same personality.) Correct me if I am wrong but from what I can tell, if you are sexually attracted to the same sex (and this basically means the sexual parts as well, and not just the overall figure) then you are basically gay/bisexual/whatever other possible things you could be. Of course there are different levels of attraction I think, and someone can appreciate the figure or shape but not necessarily be "attracted" sexually per se.


----------



## Unicorntopia

NekoNinja said:


> I would have to agree. I think there are two types of attraction - physical and mental. As in you can be attracted to the body or attracted to their personality. It is argued that a person's personality is what matters, but when it comes down to it your sexual orientation is decided by what physically attracts you (since a girl and boy can have basically the same personality.) Correct me if I am wrong but from what I can tell, if you are sexually attracted to the same sex (and this basically means the sexual parts as well, and not just the overall figure) then you are basically gay/bisexual/whatever other possible things you could be. Of course there are different levels of attraction I think, and someone can appreciate the figure or shape but not necessarily be "attracted" sexually per se.


I would have to assume by default, that if you are friends with someone of the same sex that means you are already attracted to them mentally. Then, when you stack the suttlest physicall attraction on top of that, your skrewed!


----------



## FXGZ

Unicorntopia said:


> Ok, I don't know if you thought I was being snotty, or if you are genuine.
> 
> I honestly am asking these questions and want to hear your honest anwer because I feel it may shed light on myself.
> 
> It is cool though, and I will accept that answer if it is the truth either way. :tongue:


Here is my honest answer: rules are meant to be broken, as long as I get what I want. I don't have too many rules, the only rule I follow is "Go after whatever you want as long as you are not harming yourself.".


----------



## Unicorntopia

FXGZ said:


> Here is my honest answer: rules are meant to be broken, as long as I get what I want. I don't have too many rules, the only rule I follow is "Go after whatever you want as long as you are not harming yourself.".


So, you don't try to not harm others?

This is backwards to how I was raised. I was raised to put others well being before my own.


----------



## FXGZ

Unicorntopia said:


> So, you don't try to not harm others?


If harming will back fire at me, I won't harm the others. If not harming will back fire at me, I will harm the others.


----------



## Unicorntopia

FXGZ said:


> If harming will back fire at me, I won't harm the others. If not harming will back fire at me, I will harm the others.


I could get anything and everything I ever dreamed of except for love if I did that...


----------



## FXGZ

Unicorntopia said:


> I could get anything and everything I ever dreamed of except for love if I did that...


Probably you could get a lot of stuff, but not everything. It is pretty hard to get stuff in the real world - it takes real strategies and opportunities. 

I suppose love doesn't rank very high on my list of priorities at this point. I am just starting out in life and want a lot more. Plus I am a very charming girl who is also very strategic, it is relatively easy to get the affection from the opposite sex. It is not like I get anyone's affection on demand, but I can get more than average amount of attention. Hence, not too concerned about love at this point.


----------



## Unicorntopia

FXGZ said:


> Probably you could get a lot of stuff, but not everything. It is pretty hard to get stuff in the real world - it takes real strategies and opportunities.
> 
> I suppose love doesn't rank very high on my list of priorities at this point. I am just starting out in life and want a lot more. Plus I am a very charming girl who is also very strategic, it is relatively easy to get the affection from the opposite sex. It is not like I get anyone's affection on demand, but I can get more than average amount of attention. Hence, not too concerned about love at this point.


It seems then the "more" you speak of is something more than affection and attention... hint,hint :tongue:


----------



## FXGZ

Unicorntopia said:


> It seems then the "more" you speak of is something more than affection and attention... hint,hint :tongue:


Awww you are an INFJ, according to the MBTI we should get along well!


----------



## Unicorntopia

FXGZ said:


> Awww you are an INFJ, according to the MBTI we should get along well!


lol....................


----------



## NekoNinja

FXGZ said:


> If harming will back fire at me, I won't harm the others. If not harming will back fire at me, I will harm the others.


Even evolution says this is a bad strategy. 

Biological Altruism (Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy)


----------



## FXGZ

NekoNinja said:


> Even evolution says this is a bad strategy.
> 
> Biological Altruism (Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy)


Evolution works on population level across generations of time. Not on individual level and within one generation.


----------



## redmanXNTP

Sanskrit said:


> A curious topic this one.
> I do not find other men arousing, I know what a handsome man is though when I see one and such inspires a response of security in me, likely a tribal instinct leading to group forming to increase defensive strength and potential awareness by scouting out other strong fit males to gang with.
> 
> I think this women = sex is why so many religions go about declaring women the "root of all evil" as they tempt with their looks instead of providing less distracting sensations of male company. This response makes a less educated mind likely to associate guilt and other confused feelings with feminine beauty. Which in turn means they feel protective or possessive, and that can lead to need to control the subject of such emotions.
> 
> *Unfortunate aspect of psyche. All that misfiring happening and making the primate that is man all irrational. I am not immune myself either but luckily I am in command of my facilities and practice self control in extremely strict manner at all times. *It seemingly gets easier with time, remaining objective and rational even when encountering such distractive instincts becomes a norm soon and the true consideration can be attained.
> Also I have noticed a downside from that, giving into impulses becomes harder then, the rational mind pushes through and then passion becomes distracted. Which in turn also can be harmful to relationships. In other words I still have much to be learned about balance.
> 
> Also what I think of developing human psyche is that a human for optimal results requires both a positive male figure and female figure in their lives in order to save a lot of time and self analysis in order to attain a balanced stance.
> But I seem to be veering off subject here, my apologies. I tend to ramble when posting to forums following my train of thought over the bridges of correlations and relevancies. I assure you in person I am much more stoic in my output. :tongue:


Do you deny women your essence?


----------



## redmanXNTP

My impression (as a straight guy with limited life experience with gays and lesbians) is that, with exceptions of course, homosexuality in women tends to be more the result of social experience or trauma than with male homosexuals who I believe tend to be hard-wired that way. 

In other words, most of the lesbians I've known have seemed to be in relationships with other women to essentially hide from males due to bad/abusive male relationships (fathers, husbands, boyfriends), however most have wanted ultimately to get back into a good relationship with a guy. I've not seen that trend with gays.


----------



## NekoNinja

FXGZ said:


> Evolution works on population level across generations of time. Not on individual level and within one generation.


I could argue, but theres no point since it was just a joke.


----------



## android654

Vaan said:


> Actually its interesting to not that all of the gay people i know (including my brothers) gay bash more than anyone else i know, its strange its like they are comforatable with it so they are quite happy to be relaxed and teasing about it :/.


Well fuck, a joke is a joke. Unless you're inept you can tell the difference between someone calling you an asshole and laughing and someone genuinely thinking they know you and that you're an asshole. Big difference between the two. For example...

Hey Vaan! You're an asshole!

Can you tell the difference?


----------



## Vaan

hziegel said:


> Words only have the power that we give them. If someone calls you a bitch, maybe it hurts. Maybe it starts to get personal. But if you start calling yourself a bitch and making a big deal of it, putting a positive spin on it or using it as a jest, suddenly you gave a new meaning to the word they used to insult you. Suddenly that word becomes something empowering, not something demeaning. The way we treat words can change everything.


I'm called a bitch tons, it dosen't hurt, its strange calling a man a bitch but i just brush it off. But i believe its the context and tone its used in, the gay people i know use it sometimes to describe other gay people that they hate like my brother told another gay to "Fuck off ***" before, and other times its just in humor ^^



android654 said:


> Well fuck, a joke is a joke. Unless you're inept you can tell the difference between someone calling you an asshole and laughing and someone genuinely thinking they know you and that you're an asshole. Big difference between the two. For example...
> 
> Hey Vaan! You're an asshole!
> 
> Can you tell the difference?


Oh no it can get quite harsh lol, almost vicious, but yes i can tell the difference and i know all of them very well thats why i said what i said the way i said it 

Also THATS BULLYING!!! , how dare you call me an asshole


----------



## android654

redmanINTP said:


> I acknowledged that my experience was limited (which is how you know to say that) and that was the extent of my comments. It seems that there are a lot of people here who have engaged in some inductive reasoning which somehow got attributed to me.



Because its ridiculous. Its like saying, "I know asian guys like the color purple. Cuz I met like 3 asian guys and they all like the color purple." If you don't know those people are what its like to be them why try to assert something you think you "know" to be factual?



Vaan said:


> Also THATS BULLYING!!! , how dare you call me an asshole


Sorry, sensitive little cunt huh?

But that's exactly what I'm getting at, its one thing to be facetious in the sense of a joke. But to pass off what you heard by third or fourth hand about someone, or learned to be true for one or two people and pass it off as fact, then you're a joke.


----------



## redmanXNTP

android654 said:


> Out of curiosity. How many lesbians do you actually know? You know, these man haters you're so sure are the norm. If you're trying to state that something is true, you need some evidence, you know like actually knowing people you claim to know.


Are you trying to claim that my own experience is not true? Nice attempt at turning the tables, but as stated above I've not quoted statistics or made any assertions beyond my own experience. I freely acknowledge that that experience is limited. 

It's someone else who made broad statements that nobody, including the person stating them, have supported by anything. 

As I'm not afraid of answering questions around here, I've known five lesbians, three of whom were in dating relationships when I knew them. I've known (by this I mean socialized) 4 different gay guys, one well until he moved away. Again, I made no assertions beyond my own experience. 

You seem to be looking for someone to vilify. Why so insecure?


----------



## redmanXNTP

android654 said:


> Because its ridiculous. Its like saying, "*I know asian guys like the color purple.* Cuz I met like 3 asian guys and they all like the color purple." If you don't know those people are what its like to be them why try to assert something you think you "know" to be factual?


Your straw man construction project is breathtaking. Please quote (don't paraphrase, _quote_) the language from any of my posts where I made an assertion as general as the one I've bolded.


----------



## Vaan

android654 said:


> Sorry, sensitive little cunt huh?
> 
> But that's exactly what I'm getting at, its one thing to be facetious in the sense of a joke. But to pass off what you heard by third or fourth hand about someone, or learned to be true for one or two people and pass it off as fact, then you're a joke.


Sure am ^^

And no i just take the general majority of what ive learnt from others and put that as the model FOR ME, so for me, i've found that they are more that way, and thats just because about a quarter of the people in my life are gay/bi (My two brothers and their partners, a housemate, my ex girlfriend was gay before i met her now she's bi, andrew and asian, a lebian/bi sexual match who are friends of my best mate, and three other bisexual friends ^^) , so i find my first hand examples are the best general model for my immediate surroundings in life, if i were to go and meet a different set of people i wouldn't expect the same thing but as things are this is something i've noticed in my little corner of life ^^


----------



## NekoNinja

redmanINTP said:


> I acknowledged that my experience was limited (which is how you know to say that) and that was the extent of my comments. Reread those comments - nothing in there says that what I've seen is an accurate or complete cross-section.
> 
> It seems that there are a lot of people here who have engaged in some inductive reasoning which somehow got attributed to me.


I would have said that anyways because you havnt provided any real evidence. To say that lesbianism may be possibly caused by abuse, or the like, more than homosexuality in men is a bit of a far fetched statement. I have never seen any such connection, and Ive known a few lesbians myself. I personally doubt there is any connection between the two.


----------



## android654

redmanINTP said:


> Your straw man construction project is breathtaking. Please quote (don't paraphrase, _quote_) the language from any of my posts where I made an assertion as general as the one I've bolded.





redmanINTP said:


> My impression (as a straight guy with limited life experience with gays and lesbians) is that, with exceptions of course, homosexuality in women tends to be more the result of social experience or trauma than with male homosexuals who I believe tend to be hard-wired that way.
> 
> In other words, most of the lesbians I've known have seemed to be in relationships with other women to essentially hide from males due to bad/abusive male relationships (fathers, husbands, boyfriends), however most have wanted ultimately to get back into a good relationship with a guy. I've not seen that trend with gays.


Any more of your homework you'd like to me to do? Now how is that any different form the presumption I used as an example? Here's a hint, they aren't. Its bigoted to say something is evident in other peoples behavior because you found it in you limited experiences. Also nice use of "gays" in your post.



redmanINTP said:


> Are you trying to claim that my own experience is not true? Nice attempt at turning the tables, but as stated above I've not quoted statistics or made any assertions beyond my own experience. I freely acknowledge that that experience is limited.
> 
> It's someone else who made broad statements that nobody, including the person stating them, have supported by anything.
> 
> As I'm not afraid of answering questions around here, I've known five lesbians, three of whom were in dating relationships when I knew them. I've known (by this I mean socialized) 4 different gay guys, one well until he moved away. Again, I made no assertions beyond my own experience.
> 
> You seem to be looking for someone to vilify. Why so insecure?


5 Lesbians ans 4 gay guys? What a world traveler! Guess what, that's not even close to forming a census. So you're just taking this one thing and are sharing it like its something worth knowing.


----------



## devoid

android654 said:


> 5 Lesbians ans 4 gay guys? What a world traveler! Guess what, that's not even close to forming a census. So you're just taking this one thing and are sharing it like its something worth knowing.


Although it does beg the question, "What kind of women would want to hang out with him in the first place?"


----------



## android654

hziegel said:


> Although it does beg the question, "What kind of women would want to hang out with him in the first place?"


Psst... I think the answer is none. Or maybe some of the man haters. I suppose they needed to start that somewhere.


----------



## Vaan

NekoNinja said:


> I would have said that anyways because you havnt provided any real evidence. To say that lesbianism may be possibly caused by abuse, or the like, more than homosexuality in men is a bit of a far fetched statement. I have never seen any such connection, and Ive known a few lesbians myself. I personally doubt there is any connection between the two.


I believe abuse can be a factor in both forms of Homosexuality, however i also see it is definately the only reason for it, because only 3-4 of the gay/bi people i know have admitted its because of abuse (all 4 times it was child abuse, so it was instilled fear from a young age), But the majority of cases have very little to no connection to abuse so i believe it CAN be a factor but it is not an all-encompassing rationalisation by any stretch of the imagination :/


----------



## Zeptometer

Hmmm...

I definitely have found men attractive, and I wouldn't say I'm gay or bi. Without a doubt, I think women are far more attractive, though, but some men are mildly... well, not arousing, but something or other. I don't think of having sex with them, more them having sex with a woman.


----------



## NekoNinja

Ive been looking for that icecream/polio chart that I saw a while back... 

I can't find the chart. =(


----------



## android654

Vaan said:


> I believe abuse can be a factor in both forms of Homosexuality, however i also see it is definately the only reason for it, because only 3-4 of the gay/bi people i know have admitted its because of abuse (all 4 times it was child abuse, so it was instilled fear from a young age), But the majority of cases have very little to no connection to abuse so i believe it CAN be a factor but it is not an all-encompassing rationalisation by any stretch of the imagination :/


Abuse can be a factor for any kind of behavior in adulthood. Doesn't mean that it influences sexual orientation later on in life.


----------



## Vaan

android654 said:


> Abuse can be a factor for any kind of behavior in adulthood. Doesn't mean that it influences sexual orientation later on in life.


well i think the fact that you said it can be a factor in any behaviour kinda does mean it CAN influence orientation later in life

I'm an example, i went Asexual for a very long time because i was abused, i repressed the memories and believed i had moved on without understanding it had affected me so badly. So once again, yes i believe it can be a factor in alot of things later in life, because if it didn't affect people that much it wouldn't be considered a huge issue in society -_-


----------



## redmanXNTP

android654 said:


> Any more of your homework you'd like to me to do?


You've done zero so far, so why start now? 

Name calling posing as moral indignation seems to be your forte. Are you capable of more?


----------



## android654

Vaan said:


> well i think the fact that you said it can be a factor in any behaviour kinda does mean it CAN influence orientation later in life
> 
> I'm an example, i went Asexual for a very long time because i was abused, i repressed the memories and believed i had moved on without understanding it had affected me so badly. So once again, yes i believe it can be a factor in alot of things later in life, because if it didn't affect people that much it wouldn't be considered a huge issue in society -_-


Sexual behavior, yeah. But not orientation, the two are quite different.


----------



## Jennywocky

android654 said:


> Abuse can be a factor for any kind of behavior in adulthood. Doesn't mean that it influences sexual orientation later on in life.


Orientation's a tough one anyway. It's hard to know what change is actually a "change" and what is actually just a release of the repression that was instilled earlier in life.


----------



## devoid

Vaan said:


> well i think the fact that you said it can be a factor in any behaviour kinda does mean it CAN influence orientation later in life
> 
> I'm an example, i went Asexual for a very long time because i was abused, i repressed the memories and believed i had moved on without understanding it had affected me so badly. So once again, yes i believe it can be a factor in alot of things later in life, because if it didn't affect people that much it wouldn't be considered a huge issue in society -_-


There is a difference between being asexual and being homosexual. Choosing not to have sex is not nearly the same as choosing to have sex with someone of the same gender. There is a deep level of hormonal attraction that makes it possible for two people to be sexually compatible. It's very unlikely that two heterosexual people would be able to stay in a relationship with someone of the same gender if they were lacking these hormone receptors. I actually did try to choose to be a lesbian, lol! Boy was I in for a nasty shock. It smelled so horrible to me, and for the life of me I could not be turned on by this woman. Basic arousal, sure, but it doesn't feel very good in the long run.


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## redmanXNTP

hziegel said:


> Although it does beg the question, "What kind of women would want to hang out with him in the first place?"


Zing!

Oh hey, my buddy's back! Did you bring your evidence with you?


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## redmanXNTP

android654 said:


> Sexual behavior, yeah. But not orientation, the two are quite different.


What is the difference and how do you discern it?


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## Vaan

android654 said:


> Sexual behavior, yeah. But not orientation, the two are quite different.


Asexuality is an orientation


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## devoid

Vaan said:


> Asexuality is an orientation


True asexuality is an orientation, caused by a lack of hormones which inhibits arousal and orgasm. What you were practicing is called celibacy. If you are capable of carrying on sexual relations, you are not asexual.


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## android654

Vaan said:


> Asexuality is an orientation


No, I get that. But...



hziegel said:


> True asexuality is an orientation, caused by a lack of hormones which inhibits arousal and orgasm. What you were practicing is called celibacy. If you are capable of carrying on sexual relations, you are not asexual.


She basically said it before I did.


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## Vaan

hziegel said:


> There is a difference between being asexual and being homosexual. Choosing not to have sex is not nearly the same as choosing to have sex with someone of the same gender. There is a deep level of hormonal attraction that makes it possible for two people to be sexually compatible. It's very unlikely that two heterosexual people would be able to stay in a relationship with someone of the same gender if they were lacking these hormone receptors. I actually did try to choose to be a lesbian, lol! Boy was I in for a nasty shock. It smelled so horrible to me, and for the life of me I could not be turned on by this woman. Basic arousal, sure, but it doesn't feel very good in the long run.


I believe that lacking those hormones would be just as powerful a statement :/. And and thats like saying that because they are different they are less valid, Plus as i said before its not just me who has had direct links between abuse and orientation difficulties

Listen i know that there is more to it than just abuse as i said, i'm saying it can be a factor is all

And no it wasn't celibacy, i can tell the difference in my own sexuality ^^


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## android654

Vaan said:


> I believe that lacking those hormones would be just as powerful a statement :/. And and thats like saying that because they are different they are less valid, Plus as i said before its not just me who has had direct links between abuse and orientation difficulties
> 
> Listen i know that there is more to it than just abuse as i said, i'm saying it can be a factor is all


Lack of hormones is biological. Abuse would affect someone on a psychological level. Two different stimuli.


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## NekoNinja

It's quite possible that many of the "connections" could be from when babies are still in the womb. Someone who is abusive to a child could also have likely been abusive to the mother before the child was born, which could have very well caused some damage such as hormonal imbalances. Id also like to note that psychological damage can effect someone biologically, just like your biology affects your psychology. It's all connected. But to cause a complete hormonal imbalance or severe change is probably unlikely.


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## Vaan

android654 said:


> Lack of hormones is biological. Abuse would affect someone on a psychological level. Two different stimuli.


Actually a wide range of mental issues can change hormone levels such as with PTSD and Stress. Plus even if they are different stimuli it does not change the possible link between the two, and a pschological problem can affect these things, not everything is about hormones, if we are mentally affected our responses to sexual stimuli can be adversely changed, and what we relate each to mentally can be changed which can change sex drives and even orientation

Once again i'm not saying this is the only way, i'm saying its just one way

Also sexuality is not just about hormones because if it was that simple hormone suppliments could change or revert sexualities -_-


@NekoNinja That could be a possibility too :/, however even slight changes in hormones can tip the balance ^^


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## Kriash

I don't really have much to add to this discussion, as I am not attracted to anyone, but I still have something to add.

I had a close friend who considered herself to be 100% straight, but she had a thing for boobs. She would tell me that she had such an attraction to them, but whenever she thought about the rest of a woman's body, she was automatically turned off. She talked about them a lot too. If she had been lesbian or bisexual, she would have told me, as we were open about everything. I found it really interesting and slightly strange.


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## Konan

Yes; I suppose so but not physically.


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## devoid

Vaan said:


> Actually a wide range of mental issues can change hormone levels such as with PTSD and Stress. Plus even if they are different stimuli it does not change the possible link between the two, and a pschological problem can affect these things, not everything is about hormones, if we are mentally affected our responses to sexual stimuli can be adversely changed, and what we relate each to mentally can be changed which can change sex drives and even orientation
> 
> Once again i'm not saying this is the only way, i'm saying its just one way
> 
> Also sexuality is not just about hormones because if it was that simple hormone suppliments could change or revert sexualities -_-
> 
> 
> @NekoNinja That could be a possibility too :/, however even slight changes in hormones can tip the balance ^^


For the last time, it's about hormone *receptors*, not just hormones. Your brain decides whether it is attracted to testosterone or estrogen (or neither). Stop trying to make yourself sound more important than you are in this discussion. Asexuality has nothing to do with homosexuality or female arousal. We are talking about arousal, and you are talking about your personal problems. Please stop.


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## William I am

I'm a man. I don't find other men arousing, but I do find a few attractive. It doesn't exactly make sense, since I'm not interested in them. 
Maybe they share features I like in myself, my ideals, or in women. One in particular is David Boreanaz - the lead actor in Angel and also plays in Bones. My favorite thing about Bones is that pretty much everyone on that show is nice to look at one way or another. 

If the last person to mention it was right, the Kinsey spectrum shows only 20% of the population has absolutely no sexual reaction to members of their own sex.


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## devoid

William I am said:


> I'm a man. I don't find other men arousing, but I do find a few attractive. It doesn't exactly make sense, since I'm not interested in them.
> Maybe they share features I like in myself, my ideals, or in women. One in particular is David Boreanaz - the lead actor in Angel and also plays in Bones. My favorite thing about Bones is that pretty much everyone on that show is nice to look at one way or another.
> 
> If the last person to mention it was right, the Kinsey spectrum shows only 20% of the population has absolutely no sexual reaction to members of their own sex.


Oh man, who doesn't think David Boreanaz is hot? You'd have to be asexual not to.


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## deepbluesun

As a fully hetero male, I'll say that I have no attraction whatsoever to other men. No arousal there at all. Keep in mind that this is not fueled by homophobia - I honestly feel nothing towards other guys. I do feel envy over the physique of other guys, though (what guy _doesn't_ want to look well-toned or ripped?).

As for why women more often feel arousal from each other than men do, there could be any number of theories. One of mine is that it might have to do with some form of primal competition; in other words, females easily become aroused by each others' presence as to not lose out on a potential male mate. Becoming aroused helps ensure some sort of positive action on the woman's part instead of passively letting the competing female monopolize a man.

But it could just as easily be something simpler, such as arousal by females being a sort of base-level response present in human sexuality regardless of sex.


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## StandingTiger

hziegel said:


> Do you ever find yourself either mentally or physiologically aroused by other women (this can include basic vaginal reflexes like lubrication or blood flow to the clitorus - that "tingly feeling")?


Yes, I do.


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## nikkiannpet

Back then I thought because I felt this way I would be homosexual or bisexual--but I'm not. It's true, women are just very sexy  I read an article in a magazine a while ago saying that it might not mean you're sexually attracted to the woman, but seeing someone doing something sexy is, well, sexy! Maybe it's because women are symbolic in that sense.


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## BloodiedDenizen

Well, personally I'm very attracted to women... but I'm a lesbian leaning bisexual :crazy:

But women have a much, much more fluid sexuality than men. Women can sort of go through phases where they want to be with women, then they go through phases where they want to be with men. The degree, of course, varies from woman to woman, but women are just generally more fluid. @iindigo, that's not really surprising... males have a far narrower sort of field of arousal, oddly enough.


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## Lauren Wolfe

I've never been with a woman but I do find women to be more appealing, physically. There's something just hard, sharp and mean about a man's body that can be uninviting. With that said, I am attracted to men but I'd rather watch a woman undress than a man any day.


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## nevermore

BloodiedDenizen said:


> Well, personally I'm very attracted to women... but I'm a lesbian leaning bisexual :crazy:
> 
> But women have a much, much more fluid sexuality than men. Women can sort of go through phases where they want to be with women, then they go through phases where they want to be with men. The degree, of course, varies from woman to woman, but women are just generally more fluid. @iindigo, that's not really surprising... males have a far narrower sort of field of arousal, oddly enough.


Eh...I'd believe it from what I've heard other men say but in my own case I can't say I can relate to this. I've had times in my life when I've been almost exclusively attracted to men and almost exclusively attracted to women. But for some reason when I am in the mood for one I don't have much attraction at all to the other sex. I turned down a girl who asked me out once for that reason (though I didn't tell her) only to end up kicking myself when my attraction to women returned.

I don't know, if anything I am somewhat skeptical that mono-sexuality even exists. lol.


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## William I am

Lauren Wolfe said:


> I've never been with a woman but I do find women to be more appealing, physically. There's something just hard, sharp and mean about a man's body that can be uninviting. With that said, I am attracted to men but I'd rather watch a woman undress than a man any day.


Doesn't that depend on the person's weight more than anything? I've known a number of women who made me think of those type of words. Usually the only people, male or female, that seem like that to me is people who have almost 0 body fat.


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## Monte

Are you people actually just now figuring out that you can find someone attractive without being attracted to them? :/


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## freesight

did any one of you wonder if it has to do with society? 
i mean women has been used as sex objects, and also in advertising everything as an attractive creature, we saw it everywhere (billboards, TV ...)
now personally i have been aroused by both males and females.


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## devoid

Monte said:


> Are you people actually just now figuring out that you can find someone attractive without being attracted to them? :/


I am shocked myself.  I seem to have brought multiple people out of the closet with one thread, score.


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## SharpThingsExciteMe

Well, I'm Pansexual... >.>


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