# INFP or INTP?



## afriend (Dec 20, 2009)

Hi,
first of all I'm new here (and 17 years old ) and my first language is German!
Because of this my English isn't as excellent as yours. Well, I hope you read this anyhow. 

Ok, let's come to topic:
I'm occupied with MBTI and Socionics for some months now and I have a hard time finding my type.
Sometimes I even ask myself if it was a good decision for me to make use of these personality theories.
But I can't stop searching "myself" as long I'm not sure of my personality type.
Thus I thought I could ask you for help?
At least I'm pretty sure that I'm an INFP or an INTP.There seem to be many people who can't decide themselves between these two types. I've read in forums and I got the feeling that both types are quiet similar in some areas.
I was pretty sure that I was INFP for a time but after I've read the type profile on intp.org(what is an intp? -> A detailed describtion) my picture of the INTP changed drastically. The only profiles of the INTP I had read before were German and they showed the INTP from a very cold side. Many things which are in this describtion could fit. 
I'm quiet unsure about my "social skills" now. Could it be possible that I'm an INTP instead of an INFP and that it's only wishful thinking to be an INFP?
Being INTP sounds like being socially handicapped or even "unreachable" in my ears. Thus the idea of being INTP frightens me a bit.
For example:
I think I really am not very good at things like consoling people. Once a friend (female) was very sad and crying. She came to me and I hugged her and tried to console her (she wanted to get consoled). I think I wasn't soooo bad at it but I had a little problem to empathize with her.  It's like something cramps inside of me in such situations.
On the other hand I'm a very friendly person. Every morning in school I shake hands with almost the half of my acquaintances and so on. I began doing that some years ago because I wanted to make sure that I'm accepted. I'm a man who's always concerned with that what other people could think about me. I've a quiet sensitive side.
Besides I am quiet good at school and making quiet good marks, even if it seems that I'm permanently underrating myself. That's no pretended modesty. 
I really am very unsure of my abilities. Is there a difference between INTP's and INFP's are thinking about there abilities?
In addition I always was better at maths and science than at languages. I've not read more than 10 books in my whole life. But the INFP is described as a fascinated reader. But I spent the time, that I could spent in reading, in front my computer. 
Maybe I would have spent a lot of time reading in my youth if there hadn't been an invention made which is called "computer". 
In my imagination I am very romantic. Sometimes there's even something like poetry made in my brain.
(I think books could be an enrichment for my life but I'm simply too lazy :crazy 
I am attraced to sad things and I love melancholy and thus my favourite films often are very dramatic ones.
I've read that INFP tend to like horror films. Is that true? I don't really.

Next a short description of my behaviour in social groups:
For short periods of time I can be very outgoing. Under "good acquaintances" I can get quiet dominant in a group and make a lot of jokes and so on. In common it's not a talent needed to make me laughing a lot. Often I even start laughing/smiling by recalling comic situations. Especially vulgar humor makes me laughing. But I've never the initiative on using it.^^ Sometimes I even say I wouldn't like it. hehe 
Under friends I'm rather serious (but even then I've nothing against a little joke).
But I've never had a really deep relationship to somebody.
In addition I dislike big social events. Sometimes a party can be fine but often it's only boring and exhausting. But at partys I often end up very drunk. Alcohol increases my mood and I like the feeling. Because normally I'm a bit uptight.

Another question: Can INTPs be idealistic, too? Because many users of an INTP-forum seemed to me like that. I myself am quiet idealistic - not least because of my mum who's a great idealist.

Argh, I'm not sure if I've made my point clearly enough. It's quiet hard to do that in another language and I hope you won't express yourselves too complicated (I really would be thankful if you don't).

Thank you for reading!! =)


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## Grey (Oct 10, 2009)

Welcome to the forum. To answer your last question, yes, INTPs can be idealistic (within reason, of course). Although I cannot pinpoint your 'type' based on how you describe you dilemma, have you considered a functional approach? Likewise, I would consider keeping your type in MBTI and out of Socionics, as the two systems will confuse you even further than it already has.


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## OrangeAppled (Jun 26, 2009)

> I think I really am not very good at things like consoling people. Once a friend (female) was very sad and crying. She came to me and I hugged her and tried to console her (she wanted to get consoled). I think I wasn't soooo bad at it but I had a little problem to empathize with her.  It's like something cramps inside of me in such situations.


- A big mark of the INFP is ability to empathize. Many of us are actually not warm people. We tend to be awkward socially and can come off as aloof because of our introversion. However, we are "healers" and when people need healing, we somehow become some of the most caring and compassionate people around. I'm not sure how gender might play into this though - maybe INFP men do not console in the same manner.



> On the other hand I'm a very friendly person. Every morning in school I shake hands with almost the half of my acquaintances and so on. I began doing that some years ago because I wanted to make sure that I'm accepted. I'm a man who's always concerned with that what other people could think about me. I've a quiet sensitive side.


-That sounds very charming, but it doesn't sound like INTP or INFP. It could just mean you have developed good social skills, but if I had to give it a function, I might guess Fe. Have you considered INFJ?




> Is there a difference between INTP's and INFP's are thinking about there abilities?
> In addition I always was better at maths and science than at languages. I've not read more than 10 books in my whole life. But the INFP is described as a fascinated reader. But I spent the time, that I could spent in reading, in front my computer.
> Maybe I would have spent a lot of time reading in my youth if there hadn't been an invention made which is called "computer".
> In my imagination I am very romantic. Sometimes there's even something like poetry made in my brain.


-Neither one or the other. Both types seem to enjoy reading, and INTPs can like poetry. A romantic imagination does lean towards INFP though....or an NF in general.



> Can INTPs be idealistic, too? Because many users of an INTP-forum seemed to me like that. I myself am quiet idealistic - not least because of my mum who's a great idealist.


- Sure, but it's usually not a defining characteristic like it is with NFs. Being introverted intuitives, INTPs can seem very detached from reality and have ideas which seem idealistic. I think it's unusual for one to have the level of idealism an INFP would have. INFPs are the ultimate idealists. 

I don't know if I helped you at all or just confused you more. I suggest reading up on the functions more, in particular Ti (introverted thinking) vs. Fi (introverted feeling) and seeing what resonates. I also suggest looking at INFJ (don't let the J stereotypes fool you), because many mistype as INTP also.


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

The big question for you, (to complement what Orangeappled said) is to find out whether you work on a Ti - Fe axis or on a Te - Fi.

Consider this: are you sure of what you are feeling at any given time? Can you predict how you would feel on a given situation? Are your feelings intense, deep and very complex? Do you go against whats expected of you emotionally if it conflicts with your personal values?

Or are your feelings extensive but a bit superficial and simple? Do your emotional reactions take you by surprise? You dont really know how you feel in a given situation and oftentimes it takes you a long time to decipher what you are feeling? Do you tend to mirror what the people around you feel? Do traditional ceremonies and parties excite you? 

If you answered yes to the first group of questions then you are most likely Fi. If the second applies then you lean more towards Fe. The feeling function of the INFP is Fi, so they really are focused on their own feelings, it takes up most of their time. If they are presented with a new situation, they automatically know how they feel about it, and whether it is right or wrong. If you are INTP, then your feeling function is Fe and tertiary, so it is less complex and difficult to control... when presented with a new situation, the INTP will have a hard time crafting an opinion of their own.

If you are INTP, then your leading judging function is Ti. So you can be very idealistic, but in an "objective" manner, which basically means you dont usually assign things like "good" and "bad" to things, you are more inclined to use words such as "correct" or "incorrect", "likely" and "unlikely". The way in which an INTP is idealistic, often has to do with describing and creating systems, so when they have figured out how something works and can improve upon it, or describe something that hasnt been understood yet, they become passionate and idealistic about their perspective in their own way. They truly believe they have found a piece of truth that is beautiful and elegant.


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## Highlander (Dec 20, 2009)

When I first started researching this a number of years ago, I had a very difficult time determining my type as well. Specifically, I was torn between S and N and P and J. Now, it seems very obvious, but since I didn't know myself well enough at that time, it did take a bit of effort and confirmation of a rather thorough test at work. So, I'd be patient, give it some time, and take a good test. 

My experience with INTPs is that they are pretty varied. Initially, in reading some of the profiles, it sounded like the absent minded professor type of description. In fact, I know several INTPs that are highly successful, articulate, polished, and engaging people. While they energize themselves with alone time, they have extremely strong interpersonal skills and are excellent communicators. Bottom line, remember that all types are good - there is no bad - there is just different. The more important things I'd focus on are understanding who you are, leveraging your natural talents, and applying the knowledge you gain from understanding type to enable you to better understand other people.


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## afriend (Dec 20, 2009)

Well, thank you for the posts.
I've a big problem with understanding the functions. It's so confusing and even the descriptions on german wikipedia don't help. =( I don't know how they relate to reality.


> - A big mark of the INFP is ability to empathize. Many of us are actually not warm people. We tend to be awkward socially and can come off as aloof because of our introversion. However, we are "healers" and when people need healing, we somehow become some of the most caring and compassionate people around. I'm not sure how gender might play into this though - maybe INFP men do not console in the same manner.


Certain is, that I like films where I can empathize with the characters.
If somebody in reality needs healing I get somewhat unsure. And yes, I'm very awkward socially.
I'm always waiting for the "right moment" when I want so say something important but then this moment doesn't come and the situation becomes embarrassing (at least for me; others don't even notice).
Thus I'm especially unsure in front of strangers. Sometimes I tend to misspeak all the time.


> Have you considered INFJ?


Yes, I wouldn't fully except him.


> - Sure, but it's usually not a defining characteristic like it is with NFs. Being introverted intuitives, INTPs can seem very detached from reality and have ideas which seem idealistic. I think it's unusual for one to have the level of idealism an INFP would have. INFPs are the ultimate idealists.


Hmm.. I think civilisation is bad, in periods of time I feel bad I imagine how a life in cloister would be, I like Buddhist pieces of wisdom ... =/ I want to live a life with meaning, because I think that everything, what isn't permanent, is worthless. And if I can't reach something that lasts forever I want at least do something what I consider as good like being a social worker. 


> Consider this: are you sure of what you are feeling at any given time? Can you predict how you would feel on a given situation? Are your feelings intense, deep and very complex? Do you go against whats expected of you emotionally if it conflicts with your personal values?
> 
> Or are your feelings extensive but a bit superficial and simple? Do your emotional reactions take you by surprise? You dont really know how you feel in a given situation and oftentimes it takes you a long time to decipher what you are feeling? Do you tend to mirror what the people around you feel? Do traditional ceremonies and parties excite you?


That's a hard question again. Sometimes I'm afraid that my feelings are somewhat shallow. Maybe they are, maybe they aren't. Can it be possible that my desire for deep emotions is bigger than my ability to feel deep emotions? That's the reason why the idea of being INTP frightens me so much. =(


> Do you go against whats expected of you emotionally if it conflicts with your personal values?


 I'm not sure what is meant by that. If one of my personal values are attacked I clarify instantly my point of view and get stubborn I think.^^  


> Do you tend to mirror what the people around you feel?


If I'm in a bad mood I don't take part in conversations. I make rather use of my MP3 player.


> Do traditional ceremonies and parties excite you?


No, not really.

Furthermore in german wikipedia it's said, that Fi can come along with feelings of emptiness. Is that right?
Maybe as Fe I wouldn't worry as much about my feelings. =(


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## iceman44 (Nov 11, 2009)

Try reading both types to see which fits.


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## Grey (Oct 10, 2009)

I'll try to explain the functions as best I can, if that's what you're looking for. Fi (Introverted Feeling) is about an inner value system - how you assess and feel about things that are 'right and wrong', and feeling pulled to be true to these convictions. Fe, on the other hand, is directed towards others. Whereas Fi assesses and deals with the person in question before everyone else, Fe deals with everyone else before the person in question. It has a lot to do with considering the responses of others to things, and making decisions based on those thoughts.


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## Alice in Wonderland (Sep 7, 2009)

Omg, these types are way different. Question: Do you have a strong desire to be understood and understand others? Is understanding like one of your main goals in life? If yes than this would indicate INFP.
Do you tend to be expremely picky about wording and what is true? Is discovering truth one of the main goals in your life? Is so then you are more likely an INTP.
(ps I am aware that both INFPs and INTPs care about truth and understanding, I'm just asking which is generally more important to them, him)

Have people described your trying to express you feelings as you being "vauge"? INFP. Do you _hate it_ when people are vauge? INTP.


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

Well, I wanted to ask you how old you are, because age can sometimes influence the way you perceive yourself and see the world. Almost everybody is conflicted with existential questions all throughout adolescence... feelings can be very intense in that stage as well, even if you are T dominant. 

Also, a problem that I had six/seven years ago when I discovered MBTI was that I didnt know myself very well, so I tended to fill in tests the way I wanted to be and not the way I actually was. Which ended up resulting in me scoring crazy things like ENTJ. For the most part I kept scoring extroverted because in a way I guess that is what I wanted to be. It takes a lot of time and effort to separate those visions and find clear glasses with which to see oneself. At least for me it was (and it still is) quite a challenge. 

This thread: http://personalitycafe.com/myers-briggs-forum/9813-mbti-functions-explained.html explains in detail each function, so you can have a better understanding of the system. (Like others said, I would advice you against trying Socionics for a while) Ultimately, what will provide more insight is paying attention to yourself and the way you think/talk/espress yourself. I hope it helps


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## afriend (Dec 20, 2009)

First of all I thank you all very much for your answers. In fact I've a strong inner value system and I always try to do my best to follow its rules. I've a picture of my "ideal self". Sometimes I work ideal behaviour patterns out (in mind) but it simply doesn't work in reality. Sometimes I even behave somewhat childish. I don't really appreciate this behaviour in me. Thus I appreciate people who can stay calm all the time and beware their authenticity. I like mysterious people.
I'm also interested in motives of other people and try to understand their way of behaviour. Thus I always find something good in other people and I like as good as everyone.
Well, I can behave in an extrovert manner but I'm almost certain that I am introvert. I spend the most time alone and I consider the time I spend alone as more important for me as the time I spend with my friends. Normally I dislike big social events and I rarely go to them. After them I feel so exhausted.


> Whereas Fi assesses and deals with the person in question before everyone else, Fe deals with everyone else before the person in question.


I think I must oberserve myself for some time to find that out. But I think I seem more like being Fi.


> Omg, these types are way different. Question: Do you have a strong desire to be understood and understand others? Is understanding like one of your main goals in life? If yes than this would indicate INFP.


 Hmm.. one of these strange questions again.^^ I think it's very good if you are understood and understand others. When somebody misunderstands me I'll try to clarify my point again. What else? =/


> Do you tend to be expremely picky about wording and what is true? Is discovering truth one of the main goals in your life? Is so then you are more likely an INTP.


Is discovering truth = research (and so on)? Then my answer is clearly NO. I don't consider it as a worthwile life goal to have a brain like Einstein. Furthermore I don't rate people on their knowledge.


> Have people described your trying to express you feelings as you being "vauge"? INFP. Do you _hate it_ when people are vauge? INTP.


Nobody has described my tryings to express feelings as being vague _(was that meant? can't find any translation for "vauge")_ but I don't express my inner feelings and intentions in front of others so often. Nobody really knows me. My mum perhabs a bit. 
If people describe things to me too vague, I often get a little bit confused and don't know what I shall do. People often say that I'm out of it.^^


> Well, I wanted to ask you how old you are, because age can sometimes influence the way you perceive yourself and see the world. Almost everybody is conflicted with existential questions all throughout adolescence... feelings can be very intense in that stage as well, even if you are T dominant.


 I'm 17 years old.  And thank you for the link but it's written in a quiet complicated speech. But maybe you're right and it's simply not the best time now for me to find out my type?


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