# What type gives the best advice?



## chanteuse (May 30, 2014)

Perceivers are good at brainstorming. The downside is too much speculation and no conclusion. I never ask my ENFP SIL for her opinion because she'll talk my ears off. I also don't ask my ISTP best friend because he'll get sidetracked by unrelated elements to derail the discussion.

In general I go to my INTJ friends for advice. If emotional component is needed I go to my INFP best friend.

My friends come to me for relationship, people, and business advise mostly. I have a knack at connecting dots to see patterns. I am a behind the scene advisor for a couple of friends' business ventures even though I've never been in the same field. One company may go nationwide next year because of the pointers I came up with.


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## Afterburner (Jan 8, 2013)

This seems to have more to do with wisdom and maturity than type (as with most of these sorts of questions). My mom is an INFJ (probably) and gives great advice, but I don't have much else to support any answer.


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## maxwellc (Nov 26, 2014)

ESTP (doer) being asked about dating topics often are best advice givers for that stuff.

"Stop thinking and just go up and do the flirting for crying out loud" I suggest, so what if they turn you down. 
"Your only risking none thing to begin with for a chance at success"


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## Zee Bee (Aug 19, 2014)

vella said:


> What MBTI type has given you the best advice? Best emotional advice? Best practical advice?


1 - The one with the most experience
2 - The one more people go to (same principle as to which Chinese restaurant to go to)


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## mikki104 (Apr 7, 2012)

Accounting advice?

Sex advice?

Does-this-scarf-match-my shoes advice? 

Career advancement advice?

Existential advice?

What-should-we-do-this-weekend advice? 

How should I respond to my mother's passive-aggressive texts advice?


Every type has their own expertise. And the way it's communicated - the unique connection between the giver and receiver - will greatly influence the effectiveness of the advice as well.


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## ae1905 (Jun 7, 2014)

chanteuse said:


> Perceivers are good at brainstorming. The downside is too much speculation and no solution. I never ask my ENFP SIL for her opinion because she'll talk my ears off. I also don't ask my ISTP best friend because he'll get sidetracked by unrelated elements to derail the discussion.
> 
> In general I go to my INTJ friends for advice and solution. If emotional component is needed I go to my INFP best friend.
> 
> My friends come to me for relationship, people, and business advise mostly. I have a knack at connecting dots to see patterns. I am a behind the scene advisor for a couple of friends' business ventures even though I've never been in the same field. One company may go nationwide next year because of the pointers I came up with.


This is why INXJs are popular: they come up with _a _"solution", _one _piece of advice, and they don't "wallow" in possibilities but _jump _to the "answer", and that directness reassures people that "they must be right". After all, they seem so sure! In fact, research shows that people who jump to conclusions are often wrong and that it is only after a process of conscious and searching deliberation where different possibilties are brought to light and weighed and examined that the _most likely _answer emerges. And it is most likely cuz it's usually the future that is being considered. So there is no certainty as INXJs and their supplicants believe. There is only uncertainty. And it's only by careful consideration of that uncertainty that some semblance of _real _certainty can be gained. But people would rather believe there are shortcuts or magic thinking. And so they go to INXJs and invest their pronouncements with the weight and sagacity of soothsayers.


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## chanteuse (May 30, 2014)

ae1905 said:


> This is why INXJs are popular: they come up with _a _"solution", _one _piece of advice, and they don't "wallow" in possibilities but _jump _to the "answer", and that directness reassures people that "they must be right". In fact, research shows that people who jump to conclusions are often wrong and that it is only after a process of conscious and searching deliberation where different possibilties are brought to light and weighed and examined that the _most likely _answer emerges. And it is most likely cuz it's usually the future that is being considered. So there is no certainty as INXJs and their supplicants believe. There is only uncertainty. And it's only by careful consideration of that uncertainty that some semblance of _real _certainty can be gained. But people would rather believe there are shortcuts or magic thinking. And so they go to INXJs and invest their pronouncements with the weight and sagacity of soothsayers.



Life and work experience should be taken into consideration. My INTJ friends are in their 50's and have a wealth of experiences in work and personal related issues (both are in supervisory position). They are also mature in disposition; direct but tactful.

Their take usually cuts down my confusion to let me see the pictures clearly. It's the Te Fe dynamics. To discount INXJs' Ni and aux Te/Fe is to discount the types for what they can do best.


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## ai.tran.75 (Feb 26, 2014)

chanteuse said:


> Perceivers are good at brainstorming. The downside is too much speculation and no solution. I never ask my ENFP SIL for her opinion because she'll talk my ears off. I also don't ask my ISTP best friend because he'll get sidetracked by unrelated elements to derail the discussion.
> 
> In general I go to my INTJ friends for advice and solution. If emotional component is needed I go to my INFP best friend.
> 
> My friends come to me for relationship, people, and business advise mostly. I have a knack at connecting dots to see patterns. I am a behind the scene advisor for a couple of friends' business ventures even though I've never been in the same field. One company may go nationwide next year because of the pointers I came up with.


I think it depends on the person , for me I feel that only you can find your own answer to your problem and with Perceiving types they usually lead you to finding your answers as to judgers seems to be narrow minded and give one direct answer or tell you what they think is right from their opinion or what seems like fact or societal norm just from experience of the people that I know irl. It's hard for me to imagine an istp getting side tracked when giving advice - I'm married to one and their Ti is quite focus - as for enfp will not give you the answer if asked - they lead you to answering your own answer. When it comes down to it - realistically whomever understands you and you're most comfortable with will give you the best advice but if it's a stranger observing I place emotional comfort or decision on Fi dom and rational /logical decision on Ti Dom


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## chanteuse (May 30, 2014)

ai.tran.75 said:


> I think it depends on the person , for me I feel that only you can find your own answer to your problem and with Perceiving types they usually lead you to finding your answers as to judgers seems to be narrow minded and give one direct answer or tell you what they think is right from their opinion or what seems like fact or societal norm just from experience of the people that I know irl. It's hard for me to imagine an istp getting side tracked when giving advice - I'm married to one and their Ti is quite focus - as for enfp will not give you the answer if asked - they lead you to answering your own answer. When it comes down to it - realistically whomever understands you and you're most comfortable with will give you the best advice but if it's a stranger observing I place emotional comfort or decision on Fi dom and rational /logical decision on Ti Dom


Read my opening line.

It said what you are stating. Perceivers are good for brainstorming. Your reply reiterates my point in Perceivers' tendency in going off topic.


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## ae1905 (Jun 7, 2014)

chanteuse said:


> Life and work experience should be taken into consideration. My INTJ friends are in their 50's and have a wealth of experiences in work and personal related issues (both are in supervisory position). They are also mature in disposition; direct but tactful.
> 
> Their take usually cuts down my confusion to let me see the pictures clearly. It's the Te Fe dynamics. To discount INXJs' Ni and aux Te/Fe is to discount the types for what they can do best.


What do you mean by "Te/FE" dynamics? How does that work?

All functions work better the better informed they are by experience and this is maybe especially true for Ni since it relies on recognition of patterns learned from experience. So I can see why INTJs in their 50s with a lot of life experience can give good advice. But so can any other type who has that same experience. It's the experience more than the type or cf that counts. On the flip side, INTJs' confidence in their Ni may dispose them to _overconfidence_ and _hubris_. Dick Cheney and Iraq is a glaring example of this, and a disastrous one at that.

Ni's pattern matching may give it a natural _disposition _to forecasting the future, but whether it is able or successful is another matter as the evidence shows. At any rate, I would certainly consult a trusted Ni user, but I would take his advice as just another data point in my own deliberations, one I scrutinize just as carefully as every other.


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## chanteuse (May 30, 2014)

ae1905 said:


> What do you mean by "Te/FE" dynamics? How does that work?
> 
> All functions work better the better informed they are by experience and this is maybe especially true for Ni since it relies on recognition of patterns learned from experience. So I can see why INTJs in their 50s with a lot of life experience can give good advice. But so can any other type who has that same experience. It's the experience more than the type or cf that counts. On the flip side, INTJs' confidence in their Ni may dispose them to _overconfidence_ and _hubris_. Dick Cheney and Iraq is a glaring example of this, and a disastrous one at that.
> 
> Ni's pattern matching may give it a natural _disposition _to forecasting the future, but whether it is able or successful is another matter as the evidence shows. At any rate, I would certainly consult a trusted Ni user, but I would take his advice as just another data point in my own deliberations, one I scrutinize just as carefully as every other.


In crisis my emotion overruns therefore my INTJ friends' detached analyzing mind helps me to stay objective. Their suggestions are not Bible. I have to make my own decision. However, their input in precise and streamline manner is mostly right on and hits the spot, especially when I don't have time to speculate endlessly.

Sure, all types with maturity and experiences can give advice. However, as a Ni dominant person, I trust my Ni dominant cousins (INTJs) the most. It may not be your preference but it's my preference. This forum is for people to express their opinion. I respect yours therefore please respect my preference. I am not saying INTJs are end all be all in advice and solution department. It's my personal preference that I trust my two INTJs more than anyone else in the world.


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## ae1905 (Jun 7, 2014)

chanteuse said:


> In crisis my emotion overruns therefore my INTJ friends' detached analyzing mind helps me to stay objective. Their suggestions are not Bible. I have to make my own decision. However, their input in precise and streamline manner is mostly right on and hits the spot, especially when I don't have time to speculate endlessly.
> 
> Sure, all types with maturity and experiences can give advice. However, as a Ni dominant person, I trust my Ni dominant cousins (INTJs) the most. It may not be your preference but it's my preference. This forum is for people to express their opinion. I respect yours therefore please respect my preference. I am not saying INTJs are end all be all in advice and solution department. It's my personal preference that I trust my two INTJs more than anyone else in the world.


Of course you are free to express your opinion and have your preferences. I wasn't challenging either, only the commonly-held belief that Ni is a kind of magical thinking that has special insight into the future. It doesn't. _Caveat emptor_ is my point.


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## witchy_fingers (Dec 2, 2014)

Some people want another perspective, others want reassurance or encouragement, and still there are others who want guidance. Often, it's a combination of all these things that make for good advice, but people respond differently to particular wording, and may relate better to the experiences and thoughts of certain people. I say it depends on who is being counselled. Personally, I've benefited from advice given to me by many types of people, so I think what is more important than MBTI here is the unique thought process of the individual, and how well I am able to empathize with their outlook.


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## chanteuse (May 30, 2014)

ae1905 said:


> Of course you are free to express your opinion and have your preferences. I wasn't challenging either, only the commonly-held belief that Ni is a kind of magical thinking that has special insight into the future. It doesn't. _Caveat emptor_ is my point.


you have a misconception about Ni. Ni doesn't see into the future nor magical. It's just a subliminal way at connecting dots and reconciling threads. When it comes to asking advice, it's not the same as fortune telling. You are quite mistaken the issues here.


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## Daniellekk (Dec 15, 2014)

Not ESTP if i'm any indicator :sad:


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## KanRen (Dec 17, 2014)

Ahhh! INFJs caught up! What type of sick world is this! :shocked:


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## ae1905 (Jun 7, 2014)

chanteuse said:


> you have a misconception about Ni. Ni doesn't see into the future nor magical. It's just a subliminal way at connecting dots and reconciling threads. When it comes to asking advice, it's not the same as fortune telling. You are quite mistaken the issues here.


I think we agree that Ni isn't magical thinking or soothsaying but is a form of subconcious pattern recognition. And I agree that not all advice is fortune telling but a lot of it is since it is often about future outcomes--eg, what should I do (to get the outcome I want)?


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## Caged Within (Aug 9, 2013)

I occasionally ask an NF I know for things related to classes, but I rarely ask for advice for anything else. Usually, if it's something that gives me trouble, it will probably be out of the pay grade of someone else.


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## ai.tran.75 (Feb 26, 2014)

chanteuse said:


> Read my opening line.
> 
> It said what you are stating. Perceivers are good for brainstorming. Your reply reiterates my point in Perceivers' tendency in going off topic.


The topic is which type gives the best advice and I don't think I agree or disagree with you . A judger doesn't give the best advice according to my experience. As for perceiver going off topic I believe I stated that I haven't witness an istp steering off topic yet.


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## Unfey (Apr 8, 2013)

The best advice-giver I know is my INFP mom. She understands that 99% of advice-giving is just listening and talking someone through their feelings and their options, without making assumptions or judgements. Everything I learned about giving advice and helping people, I learned from her. She also doled out lots of other handy advice throughout my childhood:

"Sometimes, violence _is_ the answer. Next time Kelly pushes you down, stand up and slug her across the face."

"The people who are mean to you, they're just jealous of you. They're jealous because they know you're not afraid-- you've never been afraid, but they _have._ They're afraid of what people think of them. They're afraid, because they don't dare show their real face. They live with masks on, and they're deathly afraid of what might happen if someone peeks underneath."

"You don't have to follow the rules if the rules are stupid. If you ever get in trouble for breaking a really stupid, unfair rule, and they threaten to call your parents, be proud. Because we will be proud of you."

"If your friends are ever saying mean things about people, even if those people aren't around to hear-- stand up for them. It's more important to be kind than to be popular."

"If the American Embassy ever tells you not to do something, _don't do it._They will find out and you will get in big trouble with the CIA."

"It doesn't matter if you win or lose. It doesn't even matter if you try hard or not. If you're not doing something that you're passionate about, you don't have to put in your all. But when you're working on something that _matters--_ something _real--_ you put your whole self out there and keep on trying until you succeed. There is no failure except the failure to use your talents."

"It's never a good idea to go camping on a safari. If you don't have the money to pay for lodging, _don't go._ Lions will steal your food during the night. Though I guess it could be worse."

"Most people want to be kind all the time. But lots of people have sad lives with a lot of pain, and that makes them afraid. And they forget sometimes-- they forget that they want to be kind. Fear and hurt makes some people dangerous."

"Never flip off a cop. Especially if he deserves it. Because that's the sort of cop who will arrest you for no good reason."

"The world is a lot bigger and a lot stranger than you'd ever imagine. You can never know everything about it, and you can never predict anything with certainty. People who think they know what's going to happen are setting themselves up for disappointment. If there's anything you can expect with certainty, it's the unexpected. Be prepared for that."


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## februarystars (Aug 22, 2012)

ENTJ (they're my dual so maybe I'm bias)

and INFJ


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

C.C said:


> *This*.
> lol I have even done it myself but I've learned to not interfere when not asked. It's just that I feel I see obvious solutions to things and want to help. xD
> 
> 
> Let's not forget that INFJs second name is counselor. While each type can give advice based on their strength, there are certain types who is IT. :tongue:



It kills me sometimes to keep my mouth shut, but I do it. Sometimes the fix is so obvious, but they aren't ready to hear it.


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## mrhcmll (Nov 22, 2013)

I have to say ESTJ. If you want a direct solution to fix your problem, a general grounding from expanding the conflict into horrible ways, and a push to make yourself do it, I say go find yourself an ESTJ that isn't stressed or busy.

I appreciate that they view the situation in a simpler way. They have a clear vision of the problem and solution in their heads that they could tell you bluntly. I mean, we could all use a little less dramaticizing of our troubles. I know I do. 

(I may be biased as they _are_ my duals, but I digress.)


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