# Am I the only one who got sad or almost cried after reading this?



## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

Seriously it's 2011, the "risk" of a relationship is shared by "two" people, so why is it "one" person's _responsibility _to be the one to take the initial risk and (grow a pair)? Thought we were trying to get rid of gender roles and sexism? Or does it only stop when things get "complicated"?

Nope doesn't make me cry, not when there are over 7 billion people on the planet. And yeah way too superficial. I also find it interesting it plays on the same idea that who you go to high school are the "best" choices of mates simply because it was common 50 to 60 years ago because of lack of globalization through economy and transportation. I mean how many people marry a high school sweatheart anymore?


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## sprinkles (Feb 7, 2010)

I don't find it sad and I'm not crying, but I think you people are missing the point.

It is a two sided story told from one side, _but both sides are the same_. If you read to the end you can infer that she felt exactly the same way he did. So who was wrong, now?


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## Ludendorff (May 30, 2011)

It's not so much a shyness issue, it's more of a confidence issue. Clearly he has a woman-friend, so he isn't a total recluse. And even the most shy person can say "I love you" without dying. What motivates people to not take action varies, but often it is just an underlying confidence issues. Shy people don't want to be extroverted, people who lack self-confidence may be either introverted or extroverted but they cannot express their inclinations because they shut themselves in.


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## Pop Crimes (Mar 31, 2010)

@snail has put my thoughts into words better than I could have. @HappyHours , with the exception of a few, I would advise you to ignore these people. I admit that your story did not make me very sad, just a little melancholic. But it was the replies to this thread that REALLY mad me sad. Sad for the people who made the posts and sad for the community who still indulges their membership and involvement.

Now all of you here who want to label me "troll" or if you have a bone to pick with me, step right up. Although I have not posted much, I have been a member of this community for two years. I have taken enough abuse from regular members and even moderators to know exactly how to deal with you.


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## twoofthree (Aug 6, 2011)

sprinkles said:


> I don't find it sad and I'm not crying, but I think you people are missing the point.
> 
> It is a two sided story told from one side, _but both sides are the same_. If you read to the end you can infer that she felt exactly the same way he did. So who was wrong, now?


That was a diary entry from high school. Who's to say that she retained those feelings.
Even if they had got together then, it may not have lasted.
Seems to me she got on with her life, married someone else.
He didn't. . . or it wasn't mentioned in the story.


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## sprinkles (Feb 7, 2010)

twoofthree said:


> That was a diary entry from high school. Who's to say that she retained those feelings.
> Even if they had got together then, it may not have lasted.
> Seems to me she got on with her life, married someone else.
> He didn't. . . or it wasn't mentioned in the story.


You don't get the irony??

_They both thought the other didn't feel the same way, and they were both wrong._ Don't get hung up on that sappy part in the middle.


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## redmanXNTP (May 17, 2011)

This is pretty maudlin for my tastes, and I actually lived something kind of similar to this, albeit in graduate school. 

As it happens, I saw her early this year for the first time in around 13 years and she'd put on about 40 pounds, so . . .



sprinkles said:


> You don't get the irony??
> 
> _They both thought the other didn't feel the same way, and they were both wrong._ Don't get hung up on that sappy part in the middle.


The sappy part in the middle? In the middle? Where the hell are the ends?


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## NotedBook300 (Sep 24, 2011)

"but she isn't think of me like that" 
I lol'd.


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## MXZCCT (May 29, 2011)

Did it make me cry? No, it did not.

But did I feel for the shy guy? Your damn right I did.

Peope do not realise the possible childhood background this guy had. I mean, based off of just this story yeah he should have found a backbone and asked her out, but nothing is that simple in life. I have personally seen what this does to people, and even though I wouldn't put myself through it in the present day, everyone is different. The effects are truly horrible. In real life, this is truly no laughing matter.


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## Aerorobyn (Nov 11, 2009)

"He shouldn't have been such a pussy" was pretty much my initial thought.


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## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

Aerorobyn said:


> "He shouldn't have been such a pussy" was pretty much my initial thought.


Why didn't the girl ask him then? Because of a deeply rooted gender role (that is strangling society that a "man" only qualifies if he's "not a pussy") perhaps?

-We want the right to vote
-We want the right to have a say
-We want the right to make the same pay
-We want the right to our bodies
-We want the right to work anywhere and do anything
-We want the right to be respected as individuals
-We want the right to be equals
-It's the *guy's *job to ask the female out?????????

*Yes sadly I know that list isn't a reality unfortunately as women are still looked down upon and should have these basic rights but you get the jest of exactly what it's saying*

In a relationship (joint union) why exactly is it "one person's job to take the first step" and why is this job assigned a gender? 

Women who answer "well I want a confident man", does this mean you are confident as well? If so, then why aren't you confident enough to ask him (his expectation may be the same). If not, you value something in a man that you yourself do not have but will look at it negatively for a guy to have the same possible issue?


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## marked174 (Feb 24, 2010)

"He needs to grow a pair!" Wow. People are jerks.


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## Brian1 (May 7, 2011)

I just thought the story lacked depth. It would've been more of a tear jerker if the characters were fleshed out more. "Carrie" by Stephen King, is a story we can relate to, because we know the characters, in that book about high school. That's what makes the horror so horrifying. Even the Breakfast Club has the stock characters from high school in detention,altogether. This story about the guy who was too shy and he doesn't know why, that same sentence repeated over and over again, it was very superficial. I can't cry over superficial.


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## Cheveyo (Nov 19, 2010)

Hokahey said:


> Why didn't the girl ask him then? Because of a deeply rooted gender role (that is strangling society that a "man" only qualifies if he's "not a pussy") perhaps?
> 
> -We want the right to vote
> -We want the right to have a say
> ...


They do not want equality.
They want both the benefits of being a man and those of being a woman.


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## MiriMiriAru (May 1, 2011)

Yes, I cried. For the time from my life I lost reading that idiotically crappy story.


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## Pop Crimes (Mar 31, 2010)

marked174 said:


> "He needs to grow a pair!" Wow. People are jerks.





> Women who answer "well I want a confident man", does this mean you are confident as well? If so, then why aren't you confident enough to ask him (his expectation may be the same). If not, you value something in a man that you yourself do not have but will look at it negatively for a guy to have the same possible issue?


 @Hokahey



> They do not want equality.They want both the benefits of being a man and those of being a woman.


 @Cheveyo

All of you have put it into words better than I can. Seriously, I'm puzzled by how cruel and selfish some people are. Anyway, yes I agree with all of you. Thank you for attenuating the general nastiness. <3

While it is perfectly reasonable to disagree with the sentiments expressed by the story, the degree of sarcasm and malice that this thread has received is truly astounding.


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## PhoebeJaspe (Apr 17, 2011)

If you actually think about it, this is a sign of 'mutual love'.
Romantic vs sexual relationships.

Friends last longer than a 'significant other'. 
My INTP friend would say:
It always made sense to stay friends with the woman I love and bone someone else. Because friends last forever, while marriage ruins everything. I could be with my wife but still be with the woman I love.

My INTP friend's theory kind of worked to an extent that, friends will always be there. Even at your funeral. Even if you married someone else. This is like Wuthering Heights, deep love on a spiritual plane. This is what humans are not understanding... Emotional love is not connected with physical love.

"Fantasy love is much better than reality love. Never doing it is very exciting. The most exciting attractions are between two opposites that never meet."
Andy Warhol 

That was a profoundly pessimistic view. But it's kind of true.


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## twoofthree (Aug 6, 2011)

Hokahey said:


> Why didn't the girl ask him then? Because of a deeply rooted gender role (that is strangling society that a "man" only qualifies if he's "not a pussy") perhaps?
> 
> -We want the right to vote
> -We want the right to have a say
> ...


She got over it. She got married. She's not the one that 50 years later was still thinking about it. . .


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## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

twoofthree said:


> She got over it. She got married. She's not the one that 50 years later was still thinking about it. . .


Well my response is to the responses to what I read that say he should have "grown a pair" and "he shouldn't be such a pussy". If you read my very first response I agree with her getting over it and he could have to. That's not what I'm saying at all. It's the gender role where men are "suppose" to be the one's to ask and are looked at as inferior if they don't.


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## twoofthree (Aug 6, 2011)

Hokahey said:


> Well my response is to the responses to what I read that say he should have "grown a pair" and "he shouldn't be such a pussy". If you read my very first response I agree with her getting over it and he could have to. That's not what I'm saying at all. It's the gender role where men are "suppose" to be the one's to ask and are looked at as inferior if they don't.


They're only "inferior" if they don't ask and then pine for ages about it.


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