# Gifted or Cursed?



## ozu (Apr 28, 2011)

Peter said:


> I'm sure you, in your ENFP world, have lots of discussions/thoughts about how hard it is to be nice to people (or similar to that.)
> 
> Then you may see some NT show up that comments: "Is this seriously a thread about how hard it is to be nice?"


Going off the problem with this analogy, I don't think you got what I was saying. 

Being nice is hardly something anyone would ever talk about in terms of "gift or curse?" I don't get off on being nice. Come to think, being nice is actually not always easy for me. I am not a tremendously nice person.


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## Peter (Feb 27, 2010)

ozu said:


> Going off the problem with this analogy, I don't think you got what I was saying.
> 
> Being nice is hardly something anyone would ever talk about in terms of "gift or curse?" I don't get off on being nice. Come to think, being nice is actually not always easy for me. I am not a tremendously nice person.


I don't think most people here "get off" on being smart either. The point is not even whether or not they are smart or not, but about how they perceive the world and what's happening in their heads and obviously they´re looking to talk to people that experience the world in a similar way.

I don't see why this is so strange.


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## dalsgaard (Aug 14, 2010)

It's a bit of both really. Mostly, it's a gift.


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## ozu (Apr 28, 2011)

Peter said:


> I don't think most people here "get off" on being smart either. The point is not even whether or not they are smart or not, but about how they perceive the world and what's happening in their heads and obviously they´re looking to talk to people that experience the world in a similar way.
> 
> I don't see why this is so strange.


My first post was intended to be flippant. I do not disagree that Ne can mess with your T function in a way that is sometimes transcendent, sometimes aggravating. I am just kind of :') at the question: "Is it hard for you to understand things better than others, in greater detail?" I suppose one could frame this as a very frank confession thread. Which by the way doesn't have as much to do with the orientation of one's T function; I could comment here myself. But I woudln't because I likewise wouldn't comment on an xNFP thread that goes, "Is it hard for you to be so creative and multitalented?" Yeah man it's a real albatross round my neck every day lolol. 

That was a more accurate analogy.


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## Peter (Feb 27, 2010)

ozu said:


> My first post was intended to be flippant. I do not disagree that Ne can mess with your T function in a way that is sometimes transcendent, sometimes aggravating. I am just kind of :') at the question: "Is it hard for you to understand things better than others, in greater detail?" I suppose one could frame this as a very frank confession thread. Which by the way doesn't have as much to do with the orientation of one's T function; I could comment here myself. But I woudln't because I likewise wouldn't comment on an xNFP thread that goes, "Is it hard for you to be so creative and multitalented?" Yeah man it's a real albatross round my neck every day lolol.
> 
> That was a more accurate analogy.


Obviously, in an NFP forum, the terminology and way to discuss things will be different. But that doesn't change the fact that in those forums things are discussed that creates the same response in NT's that you have towards this thread.

I've seen NT's mention threads they read in the NFP forums and they´re completely and utterly amazed about what people talk in there. It's the same thing.


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## ozu (Apr 28, 2011)

Peter said:


> Obviously, in an NFP forum, the terminology and way to discuss things will be different. But that doesn't change the fact that in those forums things are discussed that creates the same response in NT's that you have towards this thread.
> 
> I've seen NT's mention threads they read in the NFP forums and they´re completely and utterly amazed about what people talk in there. It's the same thing.


yeah it's we're like different species or something


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## ozu (Apr 28, 2011)

Peter said:


> Obviously, in an NFP forum, the terminology and way to discuss things will be different. But that doesn't change the fact that in those forums things are discussed that creates the same response in NT's that you have towards this thread.
> 
> I've seen NT's mention threads they read in the NFP forums and they´re completely and utterly amazed about what people talk in there. It's the same thing.


Oh hey, what's this! How exciting, I am feeling so intelligent! Now do I have a right to critique this topic?


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## ProfessorLiver (Mar 19, 2011)

Peter said:


> I bet Bill Gates is an inspiration to you.


HAHAHAHA NOPE. I'm not _that_ smart. Likewise, I don't have _that_ much potential. I also don't have that kind of ambition. Is he a good role model? Yeah, I guess. Does he inspire me? No, not really. Although, I do like how he regularly destroys Steve Jobs.


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## OneiricEntropy (Apr 22, 2010)

Peter said:


> Maybe you need to adjust your definition of "true happiness" and whether or not it's supposed to be a permanent state of being.


Perhaps. It's more of a feeling of being unable to sustain ANY emotion for a length of time. It makes me distrust what I'm feeling in a moment because I know it's likely going to be gone in a few days/weeks/months anyway. I think I'm currently on one of my pessimistic downturns that will correct itself once I've made really bad decisions to try to correct the way I feel. 

So I ask you, what's your definition of 'true happiness'? To me it's simply being content in who I have in my life at any given moment RATHER then resisting some latent urge to get as far away as possible and replace everyone with someone new. There is always a part of me that wants out of my own life- I want to not feel that.


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## Transcendence (Apr 25, 2011)

It's a wonderful gift. 

Trying to make everyone realize you're a Messiah of some sort, now that's a challenge.


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## Peter (Feb 27, 2010)

ozu said:


> Oh hey, what's this! How exciting, I am feeling so intelligent! Now do I have a right to critique this topic?


Participating would be preferred. :happy:


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## Peter (Feb 27, 2010)

OneiricEntropy said:


> Perhaps. It's more of a feeling of being unable to sustain ANY emotion for a length of time. It makes me distrust what I'm feeling in a moment because I know it's likely going to be gone in a few days/weeks/months anyway. I think I'm currently on one of my pessimistic downturns that will correct itself once I've made really bad decisions to try to correct the way I feel.
> 
> So I ask you, what's your definition of 'true happiness'? To me it's simply being content in who I have in my life at any given moment RATHER then resisting some latent urge to get as far away as possible and replace everyone with someone new. There is always a part of me that wants out of my own life- I want to not feel that.


Feelings aren't permanent. They come and go. That's pretty normal, isn't it?

True happiness? My wife always says life is a series of moments. Most of them you´re just average, no extremes. (what you call content) Then there are moments with stronger emotions, I guess you could call those the moments you´re really feeling something. If you can manage to have the majority of those be happy moments, then you´re doing fine.


And what you describe as "There is always a part of me that wants out of my own life" I would call ambitions or dreams. You´re suppose to have those. How you deal with your ambitions and dreams is up to you. If you use them as an excuse to feel bad, then that's how you'll feel. You can also use them to feel good.


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## ozu (Apr 28, 2011)

Peter said:


> Participating would be preferred. :happy:


Haha ok 

I changed my type to ENTP briefly yesterday to joke/fit in, but for serious couldn't hack it. Aux T is a magical thing.


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## SPtheGhost (Apr 26, 2010)

absent air said:


> Gifted with a curse.


Cursed with a gift


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## Carola (Apr 26, 2011)

I don't know if the real problem is intelligence , guys.
I'm not intelligent , at all , but i've similar ''problems'' .I see a lot possible outcomes to situation and i'm unable to decide , i see the world like a stream of never-ending changing situations and objects and that scares me(even if it is a challenge too), i find myself thinking about unpleasent things , my mind can never stop thinking, analyzing analyzing analyzing .I've tried to stop this activity of my mind , but i've a lot of suffering for this , because my nature is reflective , and i can't really stop this :i've continued to overanalyze myself and i suffer because i need to learn other things(and i've stopped this activity).
I feel misunderstood , because few peoples understand this inner drive : i foud a teacher that seemed a little scared by my aloofness by the current situation :tongue: 
I've the need to understand the world .And i've stopped this also because i feel that i can't uderstand nothing, i can't, even if i want , it isn't possible .
I'm pretending that i've not this need lately, i'm more''normal'' but it isn't my nature.Whatever i do with this , it hurts in some way, because i can't find mental peace.

I think that it is more an N matter , than an intelligence one (and i'm not sure to be an N..).
Than , i've a friend that seems a sensor , i guess ISTP and he is continuosly thinking about religion , he search coherency and he can't find it , but he want to take part to something, to feel a part of that religion , and he is a believer , so he suffers because he can't find perfect consistance even if he can't stop to be a believer.In this case , it is the Ti the ''sword''.
I think that to be reflective is the sword.


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## entpIdeas (Jun 6, 2011)

OneiricEntropy said:


> Before I ever learned about MBTI or Ne; my boyfriend once asked me to describe what it was like inside my mind. I told him in every situation I am in, I form several, exclusive, versions of reality in which all are fighting for the forefront position of being the most accurate version. As I ingest more and more information, the realities shuffle, exchange, and constantly evolve; constantly. I am aware always aware of the different versions, almost like selecting chapters from a DVD menu. It's very rare that one version remains for very long, which is why I can be so damn fickle and detach so easily. It's exhausting, and it feels like I will never experience true happiness becuase when I find the reality that fits what feels like happiness, it shifts and I lose all of the feeling along with that particular version of reality. I feel broken.


 I'm facinated by looking at your reply. This is an exact description of me and has been a challenge throughout my life. Coupled with the extreme joy of the constant experience of new ideas, the gift, came the familiarity and boredom of adopting any new idea into my lifestyle. The follow through on the implementation of any idea, of course becomes the curse. You and I are fortunate to be able to detach easily. The detachment is easy unless the challenge has not been met. How do you deal with moving on and detaching when something new is still swimming in your mind with possibility? This can be incapacitating to me.


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## entpIdeas (Jun 6, 2011)

ozu said:


> Going off the problem with this analogy, I don't think you got what I was saying.
> 
> Being nice is hardly something anyone would ever talk about in terms of "gift or curse?" I don't get off on being nice. Come to think, being nice is actually not always easy for me. I am not a tremendously nice person.


 Really? Me either, because I am easily bored and annoyed with people. I could make friends very quickly and easily. The more intelligent and stimulating they were, the longer I would be interested in them. Outside of that I lost patience. Since I could reason that nice was acceptable and that having relationships depended on it, I have had to learn by rote exactly how to adopt these "nice" and socially responsible attributes. It has helped me to build relationships with family, peers, colleagues, clients etc. It still isn't who I really am, but it's a role I have to work very hard at playing and have become quite adept at doing so. Lacking the innate inability is still a curse. Do you find yourself in a similar situation?


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## ozu (Apr 28, 2011)

entpIdeas said:


> Really? Me either, because I am easily bored and annoyed with people. I could make friends very quickly and easily. The more intelligent and stimulating they were, the longer I would be interested in them. Outside of that I lost patience. Since I could reason that nice was acceptable and that having relationships depended on it, I have had to learn by rote exactly how to adopt these "nice" and socially responsible attributes. It has helped me to build relationships with family, peers, colleagues, clients etc. It still isn't who I really am, but it's a role I have to work very hard at playing and have become quite adept at doing so. Lacking the innate inability is still a curse. Do you find yourself in a similar situation?


I completely agree. Hah, what a relief. I had xxTJ parents, for whom the world was neatly stratified into people "above," "below," and "on their level." I however have Fi brakes on all my opinions, and often shock even myself with how quick I am to make judgments. These are usually based, as you said, on "intelligence" or social "usefulness" or the capacity to engage. Some days I worry I have mistyped myself, and am in fact an ENTJ, or even ISTJ. I freelance in an environment where first impressions are everything, which only reinforces my first impulse towards shows of certain niceties. But I do want to be nice in a purer sense. I like the effect of being purely nice, and I appreciate it when I see people making the same effort, within reason. I have learned to "turn off" my Fi from time to time, and hope that one day I will learn to do the opposite, and use this exclusively to be a warmer person.


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## redmanXNTP (May 17, 2011)

I have a powerful brain, certainly more than most do. No brags, just facts, though I certainly have had to learn to humble my intellectual arrogance a bit as I've found through life experience how counterproductive and unhealthy it can be. 

I've likened my brain to a high performance sports car. It is able to move faster than other cars, maneuver quickly, impress people with its performance, and it's incredibly fun to drive. 

On the other hand it requires a lot of maintenance and is in the shop a lot, unreliable if you will. It's also not so good when I need to run to the proverbial supermarket. 

I have trouble focusing on mundane or rote tasks, particularly those assigned to me. It's incredibly boring and I feel terribly underutilized, like asking a bird to walk. It makes success in my professional life, which tends to be built far more upon consistency and mere competence, very difficult to attain for me despite my many gifts. 

In short, there are certainly lots of times when I think life would be much easier if I could just drive a Honda.


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## entpIdeas (Jun 6, 2011)

The equivalent of a trade-in would be a frontol lobectomy. Keep the car, I'd take a thinker over anyone else no matter what kind of paint was on the exterior. You can always slow down the sports car, but a Honda can only go so fast.


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