# Do you get stuck with unappreciative people for friends?



## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

Christian Exodia said:


> I don't want much when I am looking for a friend. I just want somebody who I can counter in talking, and in that, I mean we can talk enough to hold a decent conversation.
> 
> Quite a few of the dipshits give me a headache when I try to deal with them.


I cant talk poltics with certain former friends because they think they have two ivy league degrees they know everything. luckily some of my friends let me have my opinions. and the ones who think they know it all now dont have anything to say to me but blame bush lol. I like to talk about touchy subjects too but it is like I cant say something without someone getting butthurt. more friends are having thicker skin now thank goodness


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## Christian Exodia (May 28, 2014)

Tao Te Ching said:


> You just make sure not to die until then.


I will assure that I do not die.


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## Tao Te Ching (May 3, 2013)

thelostxin said:


> I cant talk poltics with certain former friends because they think they have two ivy league degrees they know everything. luckily some of my friends let me have my opinions. and the ones who think they know it all now dont have anything to say to me but blame bush lol. I like to talk about touchy subjects too but it is like I cant say something without someone getting butthurt. more friends are having thicker skin now thank goodness


You are overly dramatic for an adult but perfectly dramatic for a teenage dirtbag.


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## izebize (Jan 31, 2012)

thelostxin said:


> I finally found a good group of friends to get to know, but before this -- all I ever were "friends" with were people who would take from me and not give back the same amount they took.
> 
> This is what that ex-best-friend of 20+ years said to me when I defended her and put my life out on the line she said, "I don't see how it was productive yelling at my bully for her to leave me alone."
> 
> ...


I think that your fault is that you give too much and expect nothing in return. If you keep doing this, then you will end up with these kind of relationships.
I did the same thing for years (and I still do occasionally), and the most important thing that I've learnt is that it's not a rude thing to expect your loved ones to give you the treatment you gave them. It's totally okay to confront them if you feel like they don't appreciate you and your efforts enough. Like with your LDR partner, if they're not willing to visit you but expect you to visit them, then it's selfish behavior and it's absolutely okay to call them out for that. 
Also, if you appear to be "too nice" and willing to sacrifice yourself for nothing in return, you will attract the kind of people who will use you as a doormat. Learning to say 'no' and not taking responsibility for other people's troubles is a huge step.


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## Tad Cooper (Apr 10, 2010)

Oh man, try watching the anime K-on and youll feel even worse about your friendships, I know I did! 
I find my friends are usually way more self centred than I'd like, but what can you do? You can leave them but youll just end up with more people like them in the future, it's just how kids are nowadays. They tend to get better as they get older though, I know mine did!


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## richardbutt (May 31, 2014)

Nobody is obligated to reciprocate 1) the intensity of your feelings for them or 2) what you are willing to do for them. If they expect (keyword: expect) a ridiculous amount from you but are unwilling to reciprocate - so getting upset at you when you don't lend them money but being unwilling to lend you any money when you're in a time of need, for example - then that's a matter of hypocrisy, but outside of that no one owes anyone around them anything. I'd be horrified if I was expected to reciprocate favours and niceties I never asked for, and if my friends were creating a kind of 'friendship debt' in their own heads re: me without my consent by quantifying everything they'd done for me that I'm uncomfortable with doing for them I'd much rather not have them in my life. One-sidedness sucks but it's no one's fault. It's sad when friends don't reciprocate, but it's even grosser when they're reciprocating to a degree that makes them personally uncomfortable just because they feel like they owe you something. Of course, you're not obligated to stay in friendships that make you unhappy either. If you feel unsatisfied with the relationship I know it's waay easier said than done but take care of yourself and leave it.


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## theflame (Apr 12, 2014)

richardbutt said:


> Nobody is obligated to reciprocate 1) the intensity of your feelings for them or 2) what you are willing to do for them. If they expect (keyword: expect) a ridiculous amount from you but are unwilling to reciprocate - so getting upset at you when you don't lend them money but being unwilling to lend you any money when you're in a time of need, for example - then that's a matter of hypocrisy, but outside of that no one owes anyone around them anything. I'd be horrified if I was expected to reciprocate favours and niceties I never asked for, and if my friends were creating a kind of 'friendship debt' in their own heads re: me without my consent by quantifying everything they'd done for me that I'm uncomfortable with doing for them I'd much rather not have them in my life. One-sidedness sucks but it's no one's fault. It's sad when friends don't reciprocate, but it's even grosser when they're reciprocating to a degree that makes them personally uncomfortable just because they feel like they owe you something. Of course, you're not obligated to stay in friendships that make you unhappy either. If you feel unsatisfied with the relationship I know it's waay easier said than done but take care of yourself and leave it.


See the thing is, they do ask, especially when they know how broke I am which is very inconsiderate of them, especially when they have better things then me and yet they have the audacity to ask to borrow money from me as if they're trying to prevent me from living my life. And then they don't pay up what they owe. Like I have just $400 to just sit around and hand to someone. If it's $10 or $20, I don't give a shit, when you ask me for over $50, you better pay someone back, or expect to be justly nagged. People say I expect too much which I think is ridiculous because I put a lot of things out for a friendship I thought was worth it. Apparently, these so-called friends can't even apologize when they're wrong. They don't compromise and work out arguments which is probably good for me because I don't want ungrateful friends for friends.

Know what I hate? "Friends" who only hit you up when you need favors. Those people should be smacked.

The people who have it too good with a friendship, don't give the same amount in return. They're so spoiled and I'm glad I no longer allow that to happen.


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## Gossip Goat (Nov 19, 2013)

I always get stuck with assholes for friends, well except for these 3 girls. But everyone else who has been my "friend" has just been terrible. Maybe asshole isnt the right word but I guess we werent compatible.

and except for my online best friend shes so wonderful I love her soooo muchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I've been telling her to make an account on here.


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