# How to be a good Christian wife? Infj married to Entp



## curiositykillsme (Jun 18, 2014)

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## Oneyr (Jun 1, 2014)

curiositykillsme said:


> anyway Im Catholic Christian and I personally think the Isfp/Isfj is the ideal biblical wife. I want to be that.. So I guess what Im trying to ask is what humble lessons do you think an Infj wife can learn early in her marriage to be the best christian loving wife for her Entp husband?
> Thank you dearly<3
> PS- I know this stuff isnt limited to "types" but I think it helps.. thank you


I don't think you have to serve your husband like women did in the ancient times to be a good catholic christian. "Just be yourself", as they say. Catholicism claims being about love; and even when saying that men and women are different, they still are equals, even in theology. You don't have to cook and do homework just because you're a woman. Act in the way which is the most natural to you and love him, that's enough. Don't you think so?


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## Oneyr (Jun 1, 2014)

Welcome, by the way!


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## Alex Chan (Jun 17, 2014)

you shouldn't rely too much on the MBTI system, and you don't need to be the PERFECT catholic wife. nobody likes it when your not acting like yourself. your husband fell in love with you, not what you want to be. be yourself. its for the best. roud:


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## curiositykillsme (Jun 18, 2014)

Thank you Oneyr ) and to be honest I dont know.. I am Catholic but for a while I went to a Fundamentalist church and they take the bible literally.. and it seems the ideal wife takes care of the home first.. and is always submissive to her husband.. and I can actually see how this is beneficial. But I wasnt planning on getting married really haha.. which is why I think Im more of an Infj than Isfp or Isfj..I have LOTS to learn in the Sensing realm. I think most important is to be ONE with your spouse. So I guess Im trying to find out the best way to be as one with an Entp.. Hes veeerrryy easy going.. he doesnt expect anything other than me to love him.. best husband in the world. I want to be the best wife in the world for him<3


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## Oneyr (Jun 1, 2014)

Even if you had to be the perfect christian wife, this would mean you have to be perfectly you; if you're christian, you believe that God made you and love you in a unique way, and therefore you shouldn't change who you deeply are. If you also believe in the MBTI, then your type is an essential part of who you are. So you should just be an INFJ, and nothing else!


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## curiositykillsme (Jun 18, 2014)

thanks Alex  I hope so.. but Im also open to advice from a Christian standpoint and maybe Entp men?


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## Oneyr (Jun 1, 2014)

I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I think that you can't at the same time take the Bible literally and be a good catholic. Since the ancient times, catholic theologians have always claimed that there are several (four, exactly) different meanings of the scriptures, and that each book of the Bible must be read in a specific way. That's why in the end the Church came to existence: it is too complicated for a non-theologian to interpret the Bible alone, because it shouldn't be interpreted literally. You can look at this wikipedia article to learn more about this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allegory_in_the_Middle_Ages


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## curiositykillsme (Jun 18, 2014)

Thanks guys.. but reading the proverbs wife and other biblical wife descriptions Im not sure..
what I think I should work on:
*anxiety.. Its clear that a wife with faith "laughs at the days to come" and is strong (i think Isfps are very easygoing)
*I need to be more submissive and trust him to always lead (again Humble Isfp)
*" look well to the ways of her house (my sensing deficit)
*I also want to be very hospitable (Im shy and kind of anxious about having people over.. I want everytjing cleaned perfect and everything prepared perfectly first)
-_- 
honestly from going back and forth from Catholic to Fundamentalist Im probably just severly confused..


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## Oneyr (Jun 1, 2014)

curiositykillsme said:


> honestly from going back and forth from Catholic to Fundamentalist Im probably just severly confused..


This.


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## curiositykillsme (Jun 18, 2014)

yea that sounds right Oneyr.. I am catholic but still dont understand a lot.. Are you Catholic?


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## Oneyr (Jun 1, 2014)

Let's just say that I am bachelor of theology.


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## Mamoru (Mar 30, 2014)

If I may ask, what is exactly the issue between you and your spouse (if there is any)? But being a housewife isn't going to make the relationship any better honestly. As Oneyr said, just be yourself. But if you feel like you're missing something from your character, then by all means feel free to add it to yourself. I'm about to enter story time here, and hopefully this may help you OP, so bear with me.

My father did this with my mother. My father, an INTJ, has been married to my ISTJ mother for 20 years. From my understanding, these two types in a relationship have wishy-washy compatibility. But just because it's not peachy-keen from the get-go does not mean it will never work. You'll have to sometimes work at a relationship more than other people. My father is very stoic; he does not tend to be affectionate and emotional and in the past would brush off sentimental matters. My mother on the other hand is the exact opposite. She's easily hurt, while my father can be insensitive quite frequently. Both are moderate introverts as well, which doesn't make it any better. I became more observant of their actions together and noticed how it kept them molded into one.But my father, to avoid hurting my mother as much as possible, became more softhearted and that helped their relationship tremendously. He'll talk to her about anything negative that he thinks basically, such as "This situation made me feel this way...", or "what you said to me hurt me," and so on. And in return, my mother started doing it as well. This cleared up their main issue. I also noticed the small things that they do keep them in touch with each other more than one would think. They'll check up on each other to make sure they're alright. They'll call each other see if one has made it home yet, maybe call during the day to see how one is doing. They also have this ritual of watching Judge Judy or Shark Tank when they come home from work; this seems trivial and unimportant, but it keeps them attached somehow. They have a lot of fun watching it and it allows them to have fun somehow. And they'll talk about the most miscellaneous things..such as stuff on the job or what they saw during the day, etc. It keeps them intune with one another somehow. Those small things keep their love strong.

To sum all of that up, you need to think of the issues in your relationship, or what exactly could make it better. Don't let MBTI compatibility get the best of you. As I said before, you may have to pump in more effort than an ISFP would, but that's sometimes what a relationship requires. Add what you lack..or what you desire. Any relationship can work honestly with the right amount of love and effort if both partners are willing to pump the same amount of energy, time, and care into it. Being a good Christian wife alone won't do it.


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## Oneyr (Jun 1, 2014)

However, don't work to be an ISFP. You can't be an ISFP. You never will be an ISFP. What you can do is becoming a more mature INFJ.


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## DisharmonizedIntellect (Jun 13, 2014)

Don't let religion dictate your steps. I suggest looking at toward Jesus and Mary as good examples of how to be virtuous without being closed minded. See them not only as figures of worship, but also philosophers, mentors, and teachers. The most wonderful Catholics I've met were ones who actively lived a Christ-like life focused on kindness, benevolence, fortitude, and unwavering quiet faith.

Also I suggest steering away from the Old Testament and the books outside of the Four Gospels. It's full of bigotry, sexism, and just unhealthy examples that will take away from the good lessons in that Christianity was founded upon.

If you were wondering, I'm atheist.


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## EmmaGilbert (Jul 31, 2013)

curiositykillsme said:


> I am Catholic but for a while I went to a Fundamentalist church and they take the bible literally.. and it seems the ideal wife takes care of the home first.. and is always submissive to her husband..



I wouldn't call myself a Fundamentalist (I actually dislike the stereotype fundamentalists are associated with), but I have been a member of a Fundamental Baptist church all my life.


So is what you're saying here that you don't necessarily believe that is the duty of a wife and you're only questioning this now because you've attended a Fundamentalist church?


Let me let you in on a little secret.. I do believe with all my heart that a wife's primary responsibility (after God) is to her husband. However, most Fundamentalist churches take this way too far. The Bible also says husbands are love their wives, and both spouses are to, in love and humility, put the other before themselves. Both. That is the key to marriage right there is both of you putting each others needs before your own. There is something to be said for the fact that women were, in a sense, created to be helpmeets. It's why we crave that love, security, etc. We were created to pour our lives into someone else's. This doesn't mean we don't have a life of our own or have to be defined by our role as a wife. Nor does this mean you have to be the stereotypical stay-at-home mom, have dinner on the table the second your husband walks through the door, homeschool your children, etc. You are defined by whatever you choose to be defined by. As a Christian, your first goal should be to want to be defined as a Christian--as someone who loves God with all her heart, soul, mind, and strength. This means taking your focus off of yourself and choosing to place it on God and others.




> which is why I think Im more of an Infj than Isfp or Isfj..I have LOTS to learn in the Sensing realm. I think most important is to be ONE with your spouse. So I guess Im trying to find out the best way to be as one with an Entp..



So is the problem you're having that you're not connecting with him somehow? Or is it just that you want to be ISFx? If it's the first, that is not determined by your type. Yes, typology can help you discover how you're disconnecting by showing you the differences in how your brains work, but that's it. Your type does not dictate how well you get along with certain other types. Understand where the disconnect is occurring to be able to fix it. If it's the latter, you need to take your focus off of other types and work on maturing your own type. Any type can be well-balanced, but you will never be an ISFx. Trust me, I've struggled a lot with my type, as well. I have always wanted to be an intuitive. But it's ok. God created me this way for a purpose. He is molding me into exactly the person he wants me to be. He has gifted me with a unique set of qualities, characteristics, and knowledge to fill a unique role He has for me, and the same is true for you. Find what your gifts are and perfect them. Decide which of your qualities and characteristics you wish were stronger, and work on them. Most importantly, don't lose sight of God.




Oneyr said:


> If you also believe in the MBTI, then your type is an essential part of who you are. So you should just be an INFJ, and nothing else!



This right here. Work on Christlikeness, not ISFx-likeness. You *are* an INFJ. Don't be ashamed of that. Your husband married you, so obviously he loves you the way you are. Don't envy others. Just work on yourself.




curiositykillsme said:


> Thanks guys.. but reading the proverbs wife and other biblical wife descriptions Im not sure..
> what I think I should work on:
> *anxiety.. Its clear that a wife with faith "laughs at the days to come" and is strong (i think Isfps are very easygoing)
> *I need to be more submissive and trust him to always lead (again Humble Isfp)
> ...



ISFPs are not perfect either. No type is. Just because they have a trait you wish you had doesn't mean you should be unhappy with your type. Rather it means you should work to develop that trait in yourself. Who says an INFJ can't be calm, strong, easygoing, humble, take care of the tasks she's given, and be hospitable? The reality is, you're never going to be perfect, neither is anything else. Not in this fallen world. You should only be worried about striving to improve, not trying to be another type.


INFJs are a wonderful type and have great qualities that I'm sadly lacking. You're not the only one struggling with their own type/wanting to have qualities of a different type. But your type isn't changing.




Mamoru said:


> My father did this with my mother. My father, an INTJ, has been married to my ISTJ mother for 20 years. From my understanding, these two types in a relationship have wishy-washy compatibility. . . . To sum all of that up, you need to think of the issues in your relationship, or what exactly could make it better. Don't let MBTI compatibility get the best of you.



Truth. INTJ + ISTJ sounds complicated to me. I have an INTJ friend and I'm borderline E/I myself. Let me just say that would be difficult.


Any two types can make a relationship work. Don't envy what another type has to the point of you not being able to be yourself. He married you for you. Yes, you should constantly be looking to grow, but your type is fine.




> As I said before, you may have to pump in more effort than an ISFP would, but that's sometimes what a relationship requires. Add what you lack..or what you desire. Any relationship can work honestly with the right amount of love and effort if both partners are willing to pump the same amount of energy, time, and care into it. Being a good Christian wife alone won't do it.



Add what you lack/desire is exactly what I've been saying, I think. Being a "good Christian wife" in the stereotypical sense of the term won't do it alone. However, I think a good Christian wife (the Proverbs 31 woman) looks for what she lacks and works on it. That is what all Christians are supposed to be doing. We are constantly supposed to be growing.




Oneyr said:


> However, don't work to be an ISFP. You can't be an ISFP. You never will be an ISFP. What you can do is becoming a more mature INFJ.



I can't stress this one enough. This is exactly right.


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## EmmaGilbert (Jul 31, 2013)

DisharmonizedIntellect said:


> Don't let religion dictate your steps. I suggest looking at toward Jesus and Mary as good examples of how to be virtuous without being closed minded. See them not only as figures of worship, but also philosophers, mentors, and teachers. The most wonderful Catholics I've met were ones who actively lived a Christ-like life focused on kindness, benevolence, fortitude, and unwavering quiet faith.
> 
> Also I suggest steering away from the Old Testament and the books outside of the Four Gospels. It's full of bigotry, sexism, and just unhealthy examples that will take away from the good lessons in that Christianity was founded upon.
> 
> If you were wondering, I'm atheist.


An atheist that respects Christians who live out their faith? This is interesting.

Also, I think your view of the Old Testament is based on a faulty understanding, but I would love to hear more about why you think this. Since this isn't the topic of this thread, feel free to PM me.


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## DisharmonizedIntellect (Jun 13, 2014)

EmmaGilbert said:


> An atheist that respects Christians who live out their faith? This is interesting.
> 
> Also, I think your view of the Old Testament is based on a faulty understanding, but I would love to hear more about why you think this. Since this isn't the topic of this thread, feel free to PM me.


I'll be short. I don't want to debate this because it will always end up in a who wins argument.

Bigotry breeds bigotry. I respect people for who they are not what they believe in. Respect breeds respect. Tolerance for others in hopes of tolerance throughout the world.

Its not faulty understanding, rather its my personal stance from growing up in a Methodist family and a Catholic church. I would study the verses extensively and realized as much good there are in the verses, there is as much hatred and intolerance. You've seen the extremists who uphold bigotry against gays, non Christians, and other targets of hate because they take those certain ugly verse extremely literally. My Methodist church would preach how the gays and the fornificators will burn in hell. I've had gay friends who struggled with their own Christian conscious and the bigotry of the church around them. However, throughout my Catholic school education I learned a lot of the good in the scriptures that we could take into our own lives. This is why I see the scriptures in a balanced way.

However, the wording of my other post seems contrary of my belief otherwise. I probably lost the intent of my post: focus on yourself and how you can be a good person and not how others think of you as a good person.


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## curiositykillsme (Jun 18, 2014)

Thank you EmmaGilbert  I like how you said being a Christian means taking your focus off yourself and putting it on God and others. Which is of course true.. but a needed reminder for me when Im too worried about my faults to see what can be done rather than cant. I also like Alex and others advice to just be yourself cuz it doesnt really help anyone when youre not. Im still going to learn how to make my husband feel even more taken care of, fed healthy/properly (we eat out a lot :/), and make our home a haven.. but I need to trust God gave me unique traits for a reason. Honestly his personality seems as complicated as mine (which is hard to beat) in a different way.. but we fit together like.. 3D puzzle pieces? haha.. so anyway I will still try to improve and mature but not worry about it.. at least I see my faults  perhaps the Entp/Infj relations that go wrong is because the couple is too blind to even just see where they can improve? Most important is that I take the anxiety away, have faith, and live a Christ centered life the way I can. Thanks everyone.<3


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## Alex Chan (Jun 17, 2014)

DisharmonizedIntellect said:


> Don't let religion dictate your steps. I suggest looking at toward Jesus and Mary as good examples of how to be virtuous without being closed minded. See them not only as figures of worship, but also philosophers, mentors, and teachers. The most wonderful Catholics I've met were ones who actively lived a Christ-like life focused on kindness, benevolence, fortitude, and unwavering quiet faith.
> 
> Also I suggest steering away from the Old Testament and the books outside of the Four Gospels. It's full of bigotry, sexism, and just unhealthy examples that will take away from the good lessons in that Christianity was founded upon.
> 
> If you were wondering, I'm atheist.


the only atheist that said something good about Christianity XD


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## So Long So Long (Jun 6, 2009)

Welcome to the forum! 

I'm an ENTP and male. Personally I think you're worrying unnecessarily. I mean, has your husband mentioned any of this bothering him before or that you aren't holding up your part of the bargain e.g. the marriage in some way? I don't know your husband but an ENTP is going to typically be direct about that sort of thing or not even have it irritate them in the first place. 

Marriage is a big deal though, so I can understand why you might think you aren't 'enough' or aren't doing everything that you possibly can, but to be honest he married you for a reason and I very much doubt that reason has faded at all. Don't put too much stock into the whole MBTI either because it doesn't rule you; it's only a vague description of how you look at and respond to the world around you. You aren't just an INFJ, you're also you and that's the most important factor. 

Also, you mentioned not feeding him properly and that reminded me of my ESFJ mother who _hates_ cooking. Loathes more like. She grew up in a Presbyterian household where she memorized scripture and grew up with images of being a good Christian housewife in her head as well, which supposedly includes cooking. The thing is my dad (he's an ISTJ) couldn't care less about if she cooks or not. There's always places to go eat at, microwavable dishes to be had and foods that he himself loves to make. Your husband very well might feel the same. This brings me to my next point, if you are _really_ concerned: talk to him about it. Communication and honesty are important in any relationship but especially one that is in matrimony. You can work all you want on improving yourself but unless you also clue him in then nothing is really going to be solved. 

Anyway, I wish you luck and again, welcome to PC!


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## ElliCat (May 4, 2014)

So Long So Long said:


> This brings me to my next point, if you are _really_ concerned: talk to him about it. Communication and honesty are important in any relationship but especially one that is in matrimony. You can work all you want on improving yourself but unless you also clue him in then nothing is really going to be solved.


I'm also with an ENTP and this is SO dead on. They want you to talk to them, and they're going to talk to you. They absolutely hate mind games and passive-aggressiveness. The best thing you can do is learn to be open about your fears and be able to discuss them without getting upset at every imagined slight (which is easier said than done for us Feelers). 

I made the mistake of checking up on INFP/ENTP compatibility when I figured out my boyfriend's type and I had to stop because I was getting so worked up over all the failures of others that I was risking my own relationship. You are more than your type!! Honestly all MBTI does is describe HOW you take in information. I think the Enneagram is more relevant to people's actual personalities, but even then, YOU ARE MORE THAN YOUR TYPE. YOU ARE YOU. Your hubby married you for a reason, right? I'm no longer a Christian but I remember how important it is to remember that God created you and He loves you as you are. All you need to do is work on becoming the best woman YOU can be. 

Also I doubt ISFP would make a good Christian wife in the sense that your Fundamentalist church is teaching. I can say from experience that dominant Fi is anything but submissive!!

And welcome, welcome!


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## DisharmonizedIntellect (Jun 13, 2014)

Personality is something that has eluded human understanding since the beginning of our self-awareness (whether that is through evolution or God's creation). Our consciousness is one of the most complex things in the universe. Thousands of years we've pondered and still we have no real answers only theory. If you're one of Christian faith, I urge you not to look into compatbility, theories, or horoscopes for answers. Rather, focus on looking at everything through the lenses of Christ-like love that Jesus had. Love yourself, love your family, love your neighbors truly from the depths of your heart. This love is a warm love that doesn't judge itself nor judges others. Imitate Christ, be-Christ-like, then good things will happen to you (or as they say).


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## Oneyr (Jun 1, 2014)

DisharmonizedIntellect said:


> Personality is something that has eluded human understanding since the beginning of our self-awareness (whether that is through evolution or God's creation). Our consciousness is one of the most complex things in the universe. Thousands of years we've pondered and still we have no real answers only theory. If you're one of Christian faith, I urge you not to look into compatbility, theories, or horoscopes for answers. Rather, focus on looking at everything through the lenses of Christ-like love that Jesus had. Love yourself, love your family, love your neighbors truly from the depths of your heart. This love is a warm love that doesn't judge itself nor judges others. Imitate Christ, be-Christ-like, then good things will happen to you (or as they say).


Furthermore, it's something an INFJ should be able to do naturally


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## DisharmonizedIntellect (Jun 13, 2014)

Oneyr said:


> Furthermore, it's something an INFJ should be able to do naturally


Hehe, well said Oneyr.


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## Tezcatlipoca (Jun 6, 2014)

Woah what an interesting way of looking at things.

The secrets to a happy marriage (for men) seem to be:

Lots of sexy times
Good food
Don't spend all the monies

You're probably being too hard on yourself, but shouldn't you post on a Christian forum to get advice? I mean I am an atheist after all so as you well know my advice is infused with the spirit of my lord satan


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## Jennywocky (Aug 7, 2009)

Pretty much what everyone else said.

I've seen ENTP/IFJ relationships before. I think the N would at least give you a connection point. When the female is an ISFJ, it's one of those relationships where you either seem to be doing well or you're having trouble because you're so different -- either the differences let you cover all the bases or the differences are making it hard to feel connected....

... which again leads back to communication. Communication is the glue, especially when you can't rely on your similarities to simply be in sync. When all else fails, talk with respect and understanding.


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## Golden Rose (Jun 5, 2014)

I don't mean to disrespect your beliefs but I think that your husband loves you for who you are, faults and all. That's why he chose you and not some 'ideal ISFJ woman'.

Growing as a person is a wonderful thing and I wish you luck but changing to fit into an idealized version of the perfect wife doesn't seem like a good idea and it probably won't make you happier, just more anxious. Why don't you sign up for cooking classes instead? You could find a new hobby that you enjoy and showing him what you've learned will definitely make him proud of your efforts!

But do it because you want to, not because your religion expects you to. Good luck!


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## Dalton (Jun 10, 2013)

curiositykillsme said:


> Hello.. I am an Infj newly married to an Entp. I thought these two were perfect types but the more research I did it was hard to find successful examples of long marriages of these two. It scares me when I see some of the marriages go sour especially when it was because of faults in the Infj personality (stubborness, over sensitivity).


Most marriages end in divorce, so even if you can't find many examples of long-term "success", it _doesn't_ mean that INFJ-ENTP are less likely to work out. I don't think that INFJ-ENTP have a higher risk than anybody else, and I would _guess_ that is actually one of the more likely combinations to succeed!

I think it's a classic INFJ problem to self-doubt, so that you don't realize how great you are. I can relate to the habit of comparing myself to an ideal, and refusing to take compliments or pat myself on the back, even if I'm ahead of other people, because I have a drive to be perfect, not just better than other people.



> I also found a lot of Entps were actually saying Isfp to be perfect for them..


I don't know who you spoke to, but if they're referring to "duality" as the reason, they're mixing up Socionics with MBTI, because Socionics claims that ISFp (MBTI's ISFJ) is best for ENTp (ENTP).

I don't see them saying this on their own, because ISFPs and ENTPs are like day and night, with nothing in common in terms of cognitive functions.



> and to be completely honest I envy that type a lot. They seem way more humble than me ..


Rule number 1 about humility: If you truly worry and think that you're not humble enough, that means that you're _already_ humble. :tongue: You just need to _keep on_ being humble.



> def more down to earth.. and it looks like they are all great a cooking and domestic affairs. Im upset cuz Im still bad at cooking but between work and school its hard to learn from the beginning.. I often wish I could just slow down and learn all the "Sensing" domestic things but right now we both need me to work a lot of hours :'( anyway Im Catholic Christian and I personally think the Isfp/Isfj is the ideal biblical wife. I want to be that.. So I guess what Im trying to ask is what humble lessons do you think an Infj wife can learn early in her marriage to be the best christian loving wife for her Entp husband?


I assume you believe that if you put in all your effort and come short, the Lord will help you the rest of the way. It doesn't make sense to feel guilty about not doing the things you can't do.



Alex Chan said:


> the only atheist that said something good about Christianity XD


Most atheists would (and should) admit that there are some good points to it. I just think that there are far more cons than pros.


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## DisharmonizedIntellect (Jun 13, 2014)

Dalton said:


> Most atheists would (and should) admit that there are some good points to it. I just think that there are far more cons than pros.


I overlook the cons in favor of good. Take only the good lessons from every religion and philosophy and holy shit...there's the utopia for humanity.


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## Dalton (Jun 10, 2013)

DisharmonizedIntellect said:


> I overlook the cons in favor of good. Take only the good lessons from every religion and philosophy and holy shit...there's the utopia for humanity.


I look at religions & philosophies as all-or-nothing. If it's incomplete, I search for the completion, but if it's imperfect, I start anew. When I start from scratch, I know that I can trace the origin of the resulting philosophy, as opposed to the murky background of other people's ideas.


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## DisharmonizedIntellect (Jun 13, 2014)

Dalton said:


> I look at religions & philosophies as all-or-nothing. If it's incomplete, I search for the completion, but if it's imperfect, I start anew. When I start from scratch, I know that I can trace the origin of the resulting philosophy, as opposed to the murky background of other people's ideas.


I build my own perfect world inside my head.


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## dulcinea (Aug 22, 2011)

Hi @curiositykillsme. Nice to meet you. Idk about ENTPs in general, but the ones here absolutely gush over the INFJs. I don't think you have to be a particular personality type to be a good wife, and be domestic. I think you become whatever you feel you need to be. I have the view that humans are fluid and adaptable, and each individual of one type can vary greatly from another, based, partly on life experiences. I think our experiences shape us. 

As far as being a good Christian wife, I believe that the Bible was written for everyone, including people of every type. I know a lot of people of all types, and all different backgrounds who have benefited from Bible instruction, including the scripture you mentioned at Proverbs 31. Perhaps, instead of envying another type, you can pray for the qualities you need to be a good wife. Many qualities such as patience, mildness, and self control, are listed in Galatians as part of the "fruitage" of God's Holy Spirit. In Acts 10, it states that "God is not partial" so he doesn't even favor one personality type over another, but wants all types to attain to salvation.


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## curiositykillsme (Jun 18, 2014)

Thanks again everyone.. yea Im at peace again... luckily we dont really have exact boxed personalities so I can be whatever God wants me to be for my husband.<3 And yea I was looking more at the female ISFp in socionics.. to me that sounds just how I want to be as a wife.. again though its all just theory


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## Aya the Abysswalker (Mar 23, 2012)

Be respectful, kind and gentle to your husband. I think the most important for a relationship (no matter the religion) is talking and trusting. If you trust him and he trusts you, you'll be a good wife without a doubt.


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## thatdennis (Dec 16, 2013)

Honestly what I believe, there is no such thing as a good Christian/Catholic wife, there is only a good wife.

I mean I'm an ISFJ, and I understand that you want to be a good wife like an ISFJ is, but let me tell you, not all males are appeased by this. Some men actually hate submissive women, or traditional women. 

However, if you insist on being a good Christian wife, I suggest you look at the traditional women stereotype, or just see the old Japanese values for a wife. Submissive to the husband, never getting angry at them, always kind and caring, selfless, thinks about others, yeah those stuff.

P.S. I'm a Christian myself, and see that a lot of men actually deviate from wanting a traditional/good Christian wife (asides from me, I love them).


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