# If you could have chosen your parent's MBTI



## Dania (Oct 31, 2009)

For a mom I would have want INFJ or ENFJ


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## contradictionary (Apr 1, 2018)

NoWayOut said:


> I can't rule it out completely, but I find it hard to believe she uses Fi over Fe considering how hardcore she is about avoiding conflict at all costs. xSFJ use Si over Se btw, and in my experience they can be just as oblivious to their surroundings as me, so I wouldn't count on them being able to help you much when it comes to Se. xSyP should be the type you're looking for.


Eh, yeah, i mean Si. Thanks for correcting. 

_Sent from my SO-03J sans PC_


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## PiT (May 6, 2017)

I am an INTJ and my mother is an ENTP. There is a lot of chemistry there, though it has also caused difficulties with her being an extroverted type. If I could choose her type, INTP probably would have worked better for me. 

My father died a long time ago so I didn't really know him. I lacked an opportunity to engage in typical physical activities as a kid, which is something I wish I had. If I could have him in my life with an MBTI type of my choosing, I would probably go with ISTP or some other type whose typical interests would be conducive to giving me those sorts of experiences.


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## jcxmsp (Oct 25, 2019)

I'm an INTJ woman and for some reason i'm reaaallly drawn to ENTPs. They feel like the ying to my yang. I can have a deep connection with other introverts but i feel like i need someone extroverted to get me out of my shell at times.


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## Talee_eh (Oct 27, 2011)

Absentee said:


> What would you have picked? And why? Being an INTP, i believe an ENTJ father and INFJ mother would've been ideal. This combination covers most of the bases, and could've helped me to cultivate my strengths plus actually get shit done much earlier in life.
> 
> Other types I would probably prefer as parents: INTP, INFP, ENTP. Although I would prefer that each of these would at least be paired with one xNxJ type.
> 
> My actual parents, though I love them, are ESTJ and ESFJ 😑


My actual parents are ESFP (Father) and INFJ (Mother) - Divorced, as you might have guessed.
I have zero relationship with my father and a very close one with my mother. However, I would go for an ENTJ-father and an XNTX mother, and here's the reason:
ENTJ men always take a father role for me and I really, really enjoy how our perspectives align and how they push me towards my goals. It would be faaaar better than an ESFP-father with no understanding for me.
Despite my close relationship with my mother, it's always a pain when she's not in a mood for intellectual-scientific discussions of mine or when she morally judges my hypotheses and thoughts. An NT mother would never do such things, I guess. That aside, I'm really thankful for having an INFJ as my mother. She sees what I can't see in me and always surprises me with her deep deep vision.


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## Cara355 (Jan 2, 2015)

Entp was good parent (ish) no problem with their type just what they did with it. My estp mom is adorable, but omg everything she wants to do before she dies has to happen now or within 6 hours or she'll remember it next tuesday or something.
Some stable type like esfj would have been nice I guess. But then i wouldn't be me, so who am i to judge.


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## contradictionary (Apr 1, 2018)

Cara355 said:


> Entp was good parent (ish) no problem with their type just what they did with it. My estp mom is adorable, but omg everything she wants to do before she dies has to happen now or within 6 hours or she'll remember it next tuesday or something.
> Some stable type like esfj would have been nice I guess. But then i wouldn't be me, so who am i to judge.


An esfj would want it happen within 5 minutes :tongue:


_Sent sans PC_


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## vante (Jan 2, 2020)

hmmm hard, for my mom i think ENXP that because Ne doms look fantastic and for my dad would be ISTP because from the descriptions I saw about ISTP they seem to be fucking amazing


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## alexhales (May 3, 2019)

I wouldn't want to change them, however I am curious about what it would be like if they were different types.

My dad is an INTP and my mum is an ISTJ. 

My dad is very creative like me, but we often clash, probably because of his Fe and my Fi. We find common ground in both of us being introverts, disliking small talk and superficial conversation, and a keen interest in abstract topics. However, it's difficult for us to truly bond, because he doesn't really understand my way of thinking although he won't try to make me change my mind about something, for which I am grateful. Maybe with an ENFP or ISFP father I may have been able to achieve that deeper bond/connection.


Even though my mum and I are also very different, there is some sort of mutual bond and understanding between us that I have come to appreciate over time, one which I haven't really been able to achieve with my dad. I think it's because we have all the same functions. For the most part, we're able to get on pretty well, and we kind of help each other out: she gives me lots of helpful advice in regards to Te things and anything practical, and I think I help her with her Fi and such. I would say the main things that make us so different is her being very traditional and not liking change or wanting to challenge the status quo in any way. So maybe I would pick INTJ for my mum's type. Although that would depend on which one my dad is; I feel there would be less balance with two Intuitive parents.


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## bengesserit8675309 (Dec 2, 2017)

i have a ENFP dad and a ESTJ mom. when i was a child, my father was my hero. he was the one letting me do things i want and he always made me laugh. and my mother was just a control maniac for me. than i grew up, things start to change. i realized how selfish that my dad was and actually he never try to fully get to know me. he just wanted me to be happy, in my room that he will feel comfortable and i should get along with him all the time. because he doesn't want any negativity. and he always except people to accept him who he is while he has no respect to the other people around him. and these annoyed me a lot and many shit happened after these too that i don't even want to talk about. and my mom, i felt her care, everytime, even though we were so different. even though i know she will never accept me with who i am. but she knows me, understands some points and i feel her love is beyond than her love of herself.

so, i don't think it's about MBTI types, even though i love most of the ENFPs, there is more than MBTI. but for the worldview, i would prefer ENFJ dad and a INTP mom. but i still don't think it would change anything when a person is a narcissist. or else.


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## Vesh (Mar 28, 2020)

I have an INFP dad I can barely stand and an ISFJ mom I actually really love. I'm inclined to agree type doesn't a good parent make. My dad's an intuitive and perceiver like me, but he's also absent-minded and self-preoccupied to the point of barely noticing I'm there sometimes. My mom's an SJ and, admittedly, I wouldn't want to live under her roof again, but she respected boundaries I set once I reached adulthood, she pays attention to me, she offers good advice and mostly unconditional support. She also treats me fully like an adult and equal and respects the person I've become, even if I'm not much like her, which is more than I can say for my dad, who seems to have an idea of what a father-child relationship ought to be which is largely disconnected from real life.

If I had to pick though, I think I'd go for an ExFP and maybe an ISTJ? I've always gotten along well with ISTJ coworkers who are great at helping me get organized and efficient and can simultaneously take a joke and appreciate my blunter and sharper sense of humor more than most. And I've had good relationships with all the ExFPs in my life, and would have loved an extroverted socialite parent to force me into making more friends, particularly outside of the social circles I normally gravitate to.


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## Xool Xecutioner (Jul 8, 2018)

I wouldn't do anything since my experience is already done and changing the types of my parents wouldn't rectify that experiences. Plus, I would say that MBTI is somewhat negligible in their parenting, so I wouldn't know if it would be significant in their parenting.


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## xhanako (Oct 22, 2017)

Absentee said:


> What would you have picked? And why? Being an INTP, i believe an ENTJ father and INFJ mother would've been ideal.


I'd prefer ENFJ father and INFJ mother. I just think ENFJs make great dads.


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