# Anyone notice this about women?



## Eudaimonia (Sep 24, 2013)

thismustbetheplace said:


> Wait, women do this? It always amazes me how not in tune I am with the behavior of most women. It's like everyone else got a handbook when they were young on "these are the societal things girls follow."


It must be true that some women hide when they eat, but personally I don't know of any women that hide when they eat. In fact, my one friend is a petite thang that chows down in front of everyone and talks about how she eats like a pig. And, she does! Haha! I've not had a problem eating in front of people and that includes in front of my dates.

Could it be a cultural thing? Probably more pronounced in places like Asia and Japan where you are supposed to hide your mouth when you are chewing.

Yes, I agree that women cover their mouths sometimes when they laugh or are surprised and this is something men never do.


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## FearAndTrembling (Jun 5, 2013)

Scruzz said:


> It must be true that some women hide when they eat, but personally I don't know of any women that hide when they eat. In fact, my one friend is a petite thang that chows down in front of everyone and talks about how she eats like a pig. And, she does! Haha! I've not had a problem eating in front of people and that includes in front of my dates.
> 
> Could it be a cultural thing? Probably more pronounced in places like Asia and Japan where you are supposed to hide your mouth when you are chewing.
> 
> Yes, I agree that women cover their mouths sometimes when they laugh or are surprised and this is something men never do.


Yeah, it is obviously not all, but significant enough to discuss. We even have women in here saying that other women are telling them not to eat in front of people. So I am wondering its origin. Why are some women ashamed of the hole in their face?

I noticed the mouth covering thing watching game shows as a kid. Price is Right. Seems like 75% of the women who won on there put their hands over their mouth as a reaction. And I was like, "WHY ARE THEY DOING THAT?" I still don't know.


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## Eudaimonia (Sep 24, 2013)

FearAndTrembling said:


> Yeah, it is obviously not all, but significant enough to discuss. We even have women in here saying that other women are telling them not to eat in front of people. So I am wondering its origin. Why are some women ashamed of the hole in their face?
> 
> I noticed the mouth covering thing watching game shows as a kid. Price is Right. Seems like 75% of the women who won on there put their hands over their mouth as a reaction. And I was like, "WHY ARE THEY DOING THAT?" I still don't know.


It is interesting. It could be that it originated with clothing and the covering genitalia. Men can see an orifice especially on a pretty face as a means of pleasure and there are plenty of cultures since before Islam where the women covered there faces (veiled themselves) especially in front of a man if they saw looking that them... as the ancient stories go. Then it was taught for women to cover themselves to the point that it became ingrained into nearly every culture. Although, there is a culture in Africa where it is the men who veil their faces... *shrug*. Or or or, it could be something a little more innocent where it is cute for a woman to hide her blushing face where a man is not meant to blush so doesn't hide it as that would make him look childish. Why is it that it is more acceptable for a woman to act like a child? Perhaps it is because they were thought to be inferior that way or her playfulness meant she would connect in a feeling way with her children. Wow... I can go on and on.

Instead of torturing you, I'll go ahead and quit now.


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## Eudaimonia (Sep 24, 2013)

@FearAndTrembling

There was a confused sentence that was talking about her seeing him looking at her. Haha. Sorry.

I like your signature btw.


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## RaidenPrime (Aug 4, 2012)

I pretty much inhale my food without a care. So long as it tastes good, I don't care.


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## Watch Key Phone (Mar 29, 2013)

FearAndTrembling said:


> Yeah, it is obviously not all, but significant enough to discuss. We even have women in here saying that other women are telling them not to eat in front of people. So I am wondering its origin. Why are some women ashamed of the hole in their face?
> 
> I noticed the mouth covering thing watching game shows as a kid. Price is Right. Seems like 75% of the women who won on there put their hands over their mouth as a reaction. And I was like, "WHY ARE THEY DOING THAT?" I still don't know.


Because society teaches women they must be constantly attractive, and never do anything which appears inelegant or messy - like eating.


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## Eudaimonia (Sep 24, 2013)

Watch Key Phone said:


> Because society teaches women they must be constantly attractive, and never do anything which appears inelegant or messy - like eating.


But why does society teach women to be this way? Why can't women be inelegant? Saying how it is doesn't answer the question as to why it has become this way.


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## ElasticNebula (Sep 27, 2013)

Scruzz said:


> But why does society teach women to be this way? Why can't women be inelegant? Saying how it is doesn't answer the question as to why it has become this way.


I like to think it's not "becoming" this way. Instead, it is something that may be pervasive due to gender stereotyping. However, there are many progressive women in our society, so there is no need to continue this behavior. In some parts of the world, women don't have much of a choice...but, the women I am in contact with every day largely make their own choices in life. If they choose to live in a world where they worry someone else will discover that they actively strive to achieve homeostasis... Well, that's their choice. I work in a profession that is predominantly represented by females...when they get in trouble for spreading rumors about each other and being unprofessional, pulling the "woman card" will get you no where with me.

Eating in private is whatever...but, the woman that does that has made a choice to do that. 

My only problem is that this type of "Oh, this happens because of gender" line of thinking begins to become pervasive in other aspects of life. So, eat in a closet and be as pleasant as possible, but don't pull that "it's a woman thing" with me. 

If I had a dollar for every time gender was the blame for a problem.

And, don't give me that instinct/evolutionary behaviors crap. It's also an instinct to drop your drawers when you need to go, but you make the choice to go to the bathroom instead of unloading on the super market floor. And, most of us would die if we had to rub two sticks together to make a fire, so I think we are behaviorally a bit removed from our ancestors. This implies behavior changes over time.

I say eat where you want, but don't make it a woman thing. If you do, you're part of the problem. If a guy thinks you lack grace because you are eating...he's probably a pig that you don't want to be around. 

Own your own behaviors. End of story.


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## LadyO.W.BernieBro (Sep 4, 2010)

lf you gave me a penis and balls* tonight *, l would still think the person staring at me while l'm eating has the problem.


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## Zombie Devil Duckie (Apr 11, 2012)

Muck Fe said:


> _Do women even human?_


I don't know if anyone has the answer to that.

Good question though.


-ZDD


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## Eudaimonia (Sep 24, 2013)

elasticnebula said:


> i like to think it's not "becoming" this way. Instead, it is something that may be pervasive due to gender stereotyping. However, there are many progressive women in our society, so there is no need to continue this behavior. In some parts of the world, women don't have much of a choice...but, the women i am in contact with every day largely make their own choices in life. If they choose to live in a world where they worry someone else will discover that they actively strive to achieve homeostasis... Well, that's their choice. I work in a profession that is predominantly represented by females...when they get in trouble for spreading rumors about each other and being unprofessional, pulling the "woman card" will get you no where with me.
> 
> Eating in private is whatever...but, the woman that does that has made a choice to do that.
> 
> ...


estj ? :d


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## ElasticNebula (Sep 27, 2013)

Scruzz said:


> estj ? :d


I am open to interpretation, but career services seemed pretty convinced I was an ENTJ. I take this test once a year (I go to career services when I'm bored lol...yes, I am collecting degrees). I actually tried to "hack" this test once...they gave it to us in nursing school to help determine where we would work best in terms of our preceptorship...ENTJs don't exist in the nursing world (apparently), so I tried to skew my results to ensure I'd be placed in critical care. I kept getting ENTJ and was really upset about it...The only other way to take it was to just go with the opposite of how I felt...then, I came in as ISFP. 

But, when the test came around, I felt obligated to answer truthfully...ENTJ. 

However, this issue is less to do with personality type...more to do with the fact that I get worked up about these things because I'm around a lot of females and I absolutely hate when things are attributed to gender. 

The whole system of allowing actions to be governed by genitalia is broken. Another common trope (of sorts) is that a woman rises at a position of power through sex. I find this a little concerning...as a female who wants to be CEO. It concerns me on a personal level, but it also is a way for ALL women to keep each other down. It's a current project of mine to motivate the women around me to pursue positions of power, and for other women to support them for their hard work. 

Essentially, all gendered behaviors are intended to create a system of inequality. It's a broken system, so even the behaviors that aren't overtly harmful should be avoided. It isn't just harmful to women...it's harmful to men too. Based on this thread I can assume that many people believe men don't care about their looks or how polite they seem among company. Come on!...That's so very untrue. 

Eat where you want, work where you want, wear what you want... 

Destroying gender stereotypes is a huge goal...but, one person at a time.


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## Eudaimonia (Sep 24, 2013)

ElasticNebula said:


> I am open to interpretation, but career services seemed pretty convinced I was an ENTJ. I take this test once a year (I go to career services when I'm bored lol...yes, I am collecting degrees). I actually tried to "hack" this test once...they gave it to us in nursing school to help determine where we would work best in terms of our preceptorship...ENTJs don't exist in the nursing world (apparently), so I tried to skew my results to ensure I'd be placed in critical care. I kept getting ENTJ and was really upset about it...The only other way to take it was to just go with the opposite of how I felt...then, I came in as ISFP
> .


Since you are sizing up the test and retaking it and even answering the opposite of how you felt convinces me that you may very well be ENTJ too. How highly analytical of you and you are also against "tradition" which seems very un-SJ. Yes and yes... makes perfect sense to me. Thank you.


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## Eudaimonia (Sep 24, 2013)

ElasticNebula said:


> The whole system of allowing actions to be governed by genitalia is broken. Another common trope (of sorts) is that a woman rises at a position of power through sex. I find this a little concerning...as a female who wants to be CEO. It concerns me on a personal level, but it also is a way for ALL women to keep each other down. It's a current project of mine to motivate the women around me to pursue positions of power, and for other women to support them for their hard work.
> 
> Essentially, all gendered behaviors are intended to create a system of inequality. It's a broken system, so even the behaviors that aren't overtly harmful should be avoided. It isn't just harmful to women...it's harmful to men too. Based on this thread I can assume that many people believe men don't care about their looks or how polite they seem among company. Come on!...That's so very untrue.
> 
> ...


Gearing up for war!


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## Watch Key Phone (Mar 29, 2013)

Scruzz said:


> But why does society teach women to be this way? Why can't women be inelegant? Saying how it is doesn't answer the question as to why it has become this way.


It's because of sexism - it's pretty simple. If you want to find out why sexism as a whole exists, you'll probably want to do some more in-depth research because I'm not the person to answer that question for you.


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## princeharvey55 (Sep 16, 2013)

FearAndTrembling said:


> That they don't like to be seen when they eat? They hide? Am I the only one who noticed this? Of course, if you have a gf she will eat in front of you, but random girls always seem to hide. So the questions are, has anybody else noticed this, and why do they do it? I think it's kind of cute. Maybe they just don't want us to see the food mashing around in their mouth. Maybe they see it as too basal. Kind of like them using the bathroom. Any suggestions or comments?


Its more of being a women, You see unlike us men who tend to be less graceful in public women are more refine and more easily oriented plus the fact that they are naturally sassy, and sociable. 


I guess the answer would be that they are maintaining their gender standards |^^


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## Azura Nova (Mar 23, 2009)

I don't know any women who do this and I think writing a gender generalisation title like that isn't such a good idea. Personally, I do get why some women would because of all of the societal norms associated with gender (like some people have mentionned above). I mean women are meant to be delicate, thin creatures who never eat (except for yogourt and salads), fart, burp or poop. If a thin woman eats a candy bar in public it's seen as: Wow she can eat that and still keep her nice figure! but if a bigger woman does, she's shamed for doing so despite people having no idea what either of those women have been through. 

That being said, I do feel the need to cover my mouth all the time in public when I'm eating (even if I chew with my mouth closed) and I will always be paranoid that I have food on my face. As for food choices, I can feel uncomfortable at times when I eat something unhealthy because I feel like everybody is judging me.


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## SirDave (Sep 1, 2012)

Isn't it more a case that women prefer to not be seen eating alone? Its difficult to apply the OP's premise to women eating in groups or when accompanied by a male. Then they seem unperturbed in my mind's eye.

I know my wife has told me she hates to eat alone in a public place; but from our discussions it seems more the suggestion of a status of seeming to be undesirable as a lunch mate more than any self consciousness about being watched in the act of eating.


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## JoanCrawford (Sep 27, 2012)

Powerhouse said:


> I always eat openly, but other women tell me to hide myself because it's ungraceful, for whatever reason it is.


LOL. As if grace is even still a relevant thing in our society.


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## SirDave (Sep 1, 2012)

I witness grace in many of today's more mature women, and women of position in particular. On the other hand we live in a culture in which people now attend funerals in Levi jeans


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## GinningPuma4011 (Aug 22, 2013)

isingthebodyelectric said:


> What a worthwhile reply. Thank you.


Well, that's what I've seen. In Sex & Relationships, there was one thread criticizing the traits women don't like in men. Some felt personally attacked/offended, even though nobody was specifically named. I get that it's generalizing and pretty dehumanizing, but instead of being butthurt as fuck, when you think something applies to you, why not take it as a time of reflection on who you are as a person instead of sitting there like a misogynistic asshole?

I know that doesn't represent the way all men will react, but a lot of people don't take criticism well. Whether it's pointing out a trait you don't like exhibited by some men or simply asking why they do the things they do. Like, why do you shift/scratch your balls in front of me in public? I don't want to see that shit, especially when we're on public transit and you're standing right in front of me. It sticks to your legs? You can wait.


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## GinningPuma4011 (Aug 22, 2013)

Wonszu said:


> You didn't read carefully, looked at the picture and jumped to assumptions, do you? I showed the regular and proportional barbie to represent the ridiculous pressure on society, especially on women from very young age, to look like a model or like a barbie doll. The scale of how healthy person should look moved in a wrong way. Overweight people are considered fat, normal looking people are considered overweight, while skiny people are considered normal and healthy. This helps in developing anxiety in women and desire to fit in those whacked social "norms", and in the end it makes women and girls to hide the fact they are eating, because eating = gaining fat.
> 
> Do you understand why I posted this picture now? To show how making dolls with unrealistic proportions can hurt body image in young girls. When I look at proportional barbie I see a NORMAL girl. Those are proportions of a HEALTHY young lady compared with unrealistic barbie doll saled for every young girl in the world.


You're right, I didn't read your post carefully. I'm just scrolling through on my phone. 

Anyway, BMI isn't accurate all the time. It's just another tool to help lower someone's self esteem. If you have a short body builder, they'll probably be considered overweight on BMI because BMI doesn't take muscle mass into account and muscle weighs more than fat. And it's entirely possible to be overweight AND healthy, they're not mutually exclusive. If you're doing what you can and are happy, then fuck the BMI scale and what other people think. You shouldn't feel bad about anything except for the fucked up body image society endorses


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## StElmosDream (May 26, 2012)

Wonszu said:


> Uh... this even hurts to look at... It's even more disturbing when I think young girls are watching cartoons and anime with females having this kind of body proportions.
> 
> I'm glad someone made those posters, it let people think what today's "norms" do to us. Sadly I fear some anorexic women could misunderstood the message and take it as an applause for their destroyed body...


What was more telling (maybe 5-10 years ago now) was how Kate Moss was in greatest demand at one point, during a cocaine addiction period of barely eating and recalling when Beyonce was on her 1500 or less calories diet as an icon of desirability.


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## Wonszu (Sep 25, 2013)

StElmosDream said:


> What was more telling (maybe 5-10 years ago now) was how Kate Moss was in greatest demand at one point, during a cocaine addiction period of barely eating and recalling when Beyonce was on her 1500 or less calories diet as an icon of desirability.


I am sorry for my ignorance but I had no idea who Kate Moss was until now (hooray for Wikipedia) and I barely know who Beyonce is but from what you write it's terrible. I am aware of those strict diets that models and celebrities go through but I cannot fathom why someone agrees to do such things to ones body... I'm deeply saddened that people who are looked at by other people destroys themselves and in the same time others. 

I am sorry for language but this is one mobius clusterfuck in our society.


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## Arya (Oct 17, 2012)

I don't care whether people watch me eat or not. At least it will get rid of the misconception that skinny girls don't eat. Aside from models, who do starve themselves, the average girl who is naturally skinny, does actually eat and there is nothing she can do to change her weight. I've had waiters and waitresses look in shock at the amount of food I've eaten before. It's rather amusing. I guess it gets annoying to get comments about being stick-like, or people automatically assuming that I must not eat to be the way I am. Or women who are slightly overweight (by conventional standards anyways, even if they're at a good weight for them), standing around you and making smug comments about how guys only like girls who have curves or who have fat on them. People seem to thinks it's ok to make comments like that to skinny girls, without realizing it can be just as hurtful as making similar comments around overweight girls. In actuality, it's just plain rude to make smug comments about the way skinny girls are to bolster your own ego. So that's why I'll eat without any reservations whatsoever in front of anybody.


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## this is my username (Apr 15, 2011)

FearAndTrembling said:


> That they don't like to be seen when they eat? They hide? Am I the only one who noticed this? Of course, if you have a gf she will eat in front of you, but random girls always seem to hide. So the questions are, has anybody else noticed this, and why do they do it? I think it's kind of cute. Maybe they just don't want us to see the food mashing around in their mouth. Maybe they see it as too basal. Kind of like them using the bathroom. Any suggestions or comments?


No. Maybe you smell bad and women don't like to be around you when they eat.


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## Satan Claus (Aug 6, 2013)

I have no problem eating in front of people eating is a normal human thing. Some women may be afraid they'll look fat if they eat. Immature.


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## Sara Torailles (Dec 14, 2010)

Arya said:


> I don't care whether people watch me eat or not. At least it will get rid of the misconception that skinny girls don't eat. Aside from models, who do starve themselves, the average girl who is naturally skinny, does actually eat and there is nothing she can do to change her weight. I've had waiters and waitresses look in shock at the amount of food I've eaten before. It's rather amusing. I guess it gets annoying to get comments about being stick-like, or people automatically assuming that I must not eat to be the way I am. Or women who are slightly overweight (by conventional standards anyways, even if they're at a good weight for them), standing around you and making smug comments about how guys only like girls who have curves or who have fat on them. People seem to thinks it's ok to make comments like that to skinny girls, without realizing it can be just as hurtful as making similar comments around overweight girls. In actuality, it's just plain rude to make smug comments about the way skinny girls are to bolster your own ego. So that's why I'll eat without any reservations whatsoever in front of anybody.


A woman who eats like a man is a beautiful thing. Please, never change.

P.S. I'm the same way. My friends look at me in scorn. And my ex did, too. XD


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## stargazing grasshopper (Oct 25, 2013)

isingthebodyelectric said:


> I don't like people watching me or seeing me eat either. Society makes women feel guilty for eating and makes us feel fat; for not eating air and being like supermodels. Women definitely need to care less about this pressure because it can only tear us apart.
> 
> Also, I'm Kinda getting sick of threads picking apart women on PerC. Why aren't there more threads picking apart the actions and characteristics of men?



Odd that you'd suggest focusing attention upon tearing down men rather than we all work towards improving ourselves for the benefit of all of us, god knows that most of us could use a bit of self improvement & benefit from the advice we receive from those wiser than ourselves. Enter kumbaya chanting here >...
I just can't see creating a greater divide between the sexes & creating more victims rather than reducing the negative effects image marketing has upon society.

I'm no expert or know it all when it comes to women but I'd support the cause of equality & doing what's right for humanity rather than focusing upon punishing my gender due to the short sightedness of a select few.


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## stargazing grasshopper (Oct 25, 2013)

Satan Claus said:


> I have no problem eating in front of people eating is a normal human thing. Some women may be afraid they'll look fat if they eat. Immature.



I'd eat a couple of gator burgers with you & then we can swim across that river together.


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## Promethea (Aug 24, 2009)

Satan Claus said:


> I have no problem eating in front of people eating is a normal human thing. Some women may be afraid they'll look fat if they eat. Immature.


I have had two male acquaintances who both said that its a turnoff, seeing an attractive woman eat. Some women may have had traumatic experiences dealing with men who are that shallow.


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## Promethea (Aug 24, 2009)

StElmosDream said:


> What was more telling (maybe 5-10 years ago now) was how Kate Moss was in greatest demand at one point, during a cocaine addiction period of barely eating and recalling when Beyonce was on her 1500 or less calories diet as an icon of desirability.


Once when I was browsing the stupid side of the internet, I saw some article and picture of kate moss, talking about how she "got fat" -- woman was still no larger than like a size 6. Shits so wtf.


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## StElmosDream (May 26, 2012)

Promethea said:


> I have had two male acquaintances who both said that its a turnoff, seeing an attractive woman eat. Some women may have had traumatic experiences dealing with men who are that shallow.


Such lunacy does make me think of how everybody poops, eats and drinks when only the first should be private (although lewd alcohol drinking in public making a spectacle of oneself is a bit questionable).


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## FearAndTrembling (Jun 5, 2013)

I really don't think the cases I've seen were based on body issues. 

Because the particular cases I saw, the women had a plate of food. Everyone saw that these women had food. It wasn't some secret. Everybody knows that was her plate, and she was gonna eat it. And when she hid, when she returned...we would all know that she just finished eat what was on the plate. So if, you don't want people to see you eating. Why even order the food in public? We already know you are gonna eat it. 

I think people may be looking too much into it. I see it more like a bathroom thing. When a woman goes in or comes out of a bathroom, we all know what she did in there. She knows that we know what she did too. It isn't some secret. But it is private. I just see it as a privacy/hygiene thing more than a self-esteem issue. A woman doesn't want me to see her eat for the same reason she doesn't want me to see her floss her teeth, spit or fart. I personally don't do any of those things in front of women either. Now that I think about it, I wouldn't want a woman watching me eat either. lol I wouldn't hide, but it would make me a little uncomfy.


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## TrailMix (Apr 27, 2011)

I didn't even know this was a thing. My friends actually know me as the person who is always eating haha. I had no idea that it was something people didnt do! It might be my generation that doesnt really mind tho. All my girl friends eat in front of people all the time???


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## Satan Claus (Aug 6, 2013)

stargazing grasshopper said:


> I'd eat a couple of gator burgers with you & then we can swim across that river together.


YES!!!! And if we can't make it across the river, theres always plan B!  (Unless it turns out we missed a few gators and we lose a few limbs then it looks like must die)


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## Satan Claus (Aug 6, 2013)

Promethea said:


> I have had two male acquaintances who both said that its a turnoff, seeing an attractive woman eat. Some women may have had traumatic experiences dealing with men who are that shallow.



Wow they said that? What the fuck. And yeah some women may but they should know that not all guys are like that.


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## Inveniet (Aug 21, 2009)

I personally think it is a cultural thing.
Some cultures like to dictate everything about our behaviour.
Setting different standards for the sexes.
I've seen women do this, and I've seen women don't do it.
It isn't really something I put any stock in since I realize that it is just a cultural artifact.
It has nothing to do with being female in itself.
I also notice that women with Si and Fe are more likely to adapt it than other women.


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## MrsAndrewJacoby (Apr 11, 2013)

ENTPfemme said:


> Around most guys and girls I am quite happy stuffing my face, but that changes if I have a new crush around me and it's time to eat.
> 
> There are a couple of reasons I have been uncomfortable eating in front of a guy I like, that I am not exclusive with.
> 
> ...


^THIS and THIS! OMG, I hate eating in front of people because I am like THE most clumsy person and food tends to go everywhere. It's weird. Once I was a fancy event and I got excited while talking to my friend and somehow dumped my whole plate of food into my lap. :frustrating::shocked: So yeah, I tend to hide when I eat or at least try not to eat in front of anyone I feel the need to impress.



FearAndTrembling said:


> Another thing that may be related and I have noticed since I was a little kid: women tend to cover their mouths/noses with their hands when embarrassed/excited. I rarely, if ever, see men do this.
> 
> View attachment 84102
> 
> ...


Wow, hmm. I do a lot of these stereotypical "female" things. I'm not really sure why though. I guess because when I'm very embarrassed I kind of want to hide my face. Like the whole wish you could crawl under a rock thing.




@_Arya_


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## PandaBear (Jul 2, 2013)

Maybe because I'm just a weird, but when it comes to chicken wings... GET OUT OF MY WAY! I love to eat them and oh godd! I'll eat it in front of your face to make you jealous!
But some of these stereotypes are just depression! I mean, are these stereotypes what makes reality?


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## owlet (May 7, 2010)

Never, ever noticed this. The guys and girls I've seen are usually eating on the move, so eat and walk. None of my friends do this either. Must just be a few.


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## Sun Lips (Jan 28, 2013)

I don't personally like to eat in front of anyone. I get a weird sort of performance anxiety and can't swallow my food if someone is looking at me or speaking to me while I'm chewing. It makes me gag.

Somehow I'm convinced that it is linked to my phobia of vomiting, but I'm not entirely sure why or how. They just seem to go together. The same nervous energy occurs when I feel nauseous in front of someone and when I am trying to swallow food in front of them.

Anyway, I have been aware of people of both genders who do not like to eat in front of people. They have their reasons. I believe there are lots of valid theories here - personal, cultural, hygienic, neurotic. The comment above about going to the restroom makes sense; It is something some consider private even though it's well known that we all do it. In the culture I'm surrounded by, it is generally more acceptable for men to speak openly about private things in mixed company, so perhaps that's why you come across fewer men with qualms about eating in front of people.


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## WamphyriThrall (Apr 11, 2011)

I'm not a woman, and do this all the time, too, especially around strangers. It probably does have something to do with being self-conscious in social situations, not wanting to be stared at and asked awkward questions after your co-workers see you transform from that small, quiet kid into a frenzied shark at lunch time.

It has nothing to do with weight, since I'm underweight and chow down when hungry, and would have a normal metabolism if possible.


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## Arya (Oct 17, 2012)

MrsAndrewJacoby said:


> @_Arya_


Was that necessary? I don't care what body shape people are. To put people down, whether they are skinny or fat, is essentially rude behavior. And I do find the stereotypes a bit annoying. It can actually be a perfectly healthy body type to be under the average weight, yet people will automatically assume you have eating problems. People will consistently say that being as skinny, as say a model, isn't possible without starving yourself or having loads of health problems, and I think that's bs. It might not be the majority of people, but I know a handful of girls aside from myself who are like that. This article, for instance, shows the BMIs of all these girls and explains how that is underweight. Well that might be underweight for them, but I have a BMI of 16.5, and I certainly don't go throw up my food. I make an exaggerated effort to eat a lot of fat, just to be sure I'm not underweight, but it doesn't change anything. http://unleashedmagazinenews.blogspot.com/2012/10/the-ripple-effect-when-models-say.html


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## Kittynip (Mar 24, 2013)

It's funny. I used to be shy about that kind of thing. Would order the tiniest little dish and then... Got tired of it. 
Honestly I just don't care anymore and I will eat anything thrown at me, anywhere, if I feel like it. Not eating seems to make the people I'm dining with LESS comfortable rather than the opposite effect, so if I'm trying to avoid feeling awkward, then eating seems to be key. 

Might have something to do with increasing your self confidence and/or just not giving a damn anymore. lol


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## username123 (May 21, 2013)

I think it's sad and makes perfect sense given the fact that society wants women to be super thin and in control of their food intake. I know plenty of girls who are like this, and I think it's dumb as fuck. I don't care if someone sees me eat...everyone eats. And if some chubby girl is hiding eating...who does she think she's fooling?


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## Avidya (Oct 12, 2013)

I eat normally in front of people. 

The thing I don't like eating in front of people are bananas. Holy shit, I ate a banana in front of people few times and I always get sexual comments which annoy the fuck out of me.


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## MrsAndrewJacoby (Apr 11, 2013)

Arya said:


> Was that necessary? I don't care what body shape people are. To put people down, whether they are skinny or fat, is essentially rude behavior. And I do find the stereotypes a bit annoying. It can actually be a perfectly healthy body type to be under the average weight, yet people will automatically assume you have eating problems. People will consistently say that being as skinny, as say a model, isn't possible without starving yourself or having loads of health problems, and I think that's bs. It might not be the majority of people, but I know a handful of girls aside from myself who are like that. This article, for instance, shows the BMIs of all these girls and explains how that is underweight. Well that might be underweight for them, but I have a BMI of 16.5, and I certainly don't go throw up my food. I make an exaggerated effort to eat a lot of fat, just to be sure I'm not underweight, but it doesn't change anything. Unleashed: THE RIPPLE EFFECT: When Models Say Skinny, We Jump


Honey, you completely missed the point. I'm a size 6 now who was a size 2 in high school. I was ALWAYS made fun of for being skinny and people always compared me to my more voluptuous sister and made snide comments like "She's got what the guys want, no man wants a bag of bones to snuggle up to." or "Honey you got to put some meat on those bones if you want to get a guy's attention." I wanted so badly to fit the 'perfect' hourglass shape that society praises. It gave me serious body image issues (like contemplating implants and some other really weird stuff) until about 11th grade. By then, I did finally flesh out and develop some curves (yes!) but also I just learned to accept myself for who I am. I'll always be thin. My dad is 6ft tall in his 50's and only weighs 125lbs! And my 5' 6" grandmother who gave birth to 7 children is in her 70's and weighs 140lbs. Just like people who have always been on the chunky side, it's a genetic thing and no one should be made to feel bad about it. I've come to accept I'll never be curvalicious like Shakira or Beyonce, but I'm beautiful in my own way. More importantly, I've learned not to base my worth on my physical attributes.


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## Arya (Oct 17, 2012)

MrsAndrewJacoby said:


> Honey, you completely missed the point. I'm a size 6 now who was a size 2 in high school. I was ALWAYS made fun of for being skinny and people always compared me to my more voluptuous sister and made snide comments like "She's got what the guys want, no man wants a bag of bones to snuggle up to." or "Honey you got to put some meat on those bones if you want to get a guy's attention." I wanted so badly to fit the 'perfect' hourglass shape that society praises. It gave me serious body image issues (like contemplating implants and some other really weird stuff) until about 11th grade. By then, I did finally flesh out and develop some curves (yes!) but also I just learned to accept myself for who I am. I'll always be thin. My dad is 6ft tall in his 50's and only weighs 125lbs! And my 5' 6" grandmother who gave birth to 7 children is in her 70's and weighs 140lbs. Just like people who have always been on the chunky side, it's a genetic thing and no one should be made to feel bad about it. I've come to accept I'll never be curvalicious like Shakira or Beyonce, but I'm beautiful in my own way. More importantly, I've learned not to base my worth on my physical attributes.


I'm glad to know I'm not the only one in the world who has heard comments like that. People act like over weight people get all the insults. I really don't mind the comments that much I guess, but it can be annoying. My grandma is tiny too. I think she's somewhere around 5'5" and a 110 pounds. So is my mom, and all my sisters and my brother, so I guess I'm not too worried. I just hope it isn't true that guys don't go for skinny girls. I also wonder why it's so acceptable to tell an anorexic girl that her weight isn't healthy, but try telling an overweight person that, and everyone will be up in arms about it, and start flinging lines at you about accepting people for who they are, which is fine I guess. Some people are just naturally that way, I know, but there seems to be cognitive dissonance about it.


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## Arya (Oct 17, 2012)

Avidya said:


> I eat normally in front of people.
> 
> The thing I don't like eating in front of people are bananas. Holy shit, I ate a banana in front of people few times and I always get sexual comments which annoy the fuck out of me.


Really? I eat bananas all the time, and nobody makes sexual comments. The only time I got laughed at was when I innocently said, "I want a banana. I like bananas." I laughed too though.


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## Coburn (Sep 3, 2010)

Hahaha. I have never even considered doing this. I'm infamous at my work for always having food around.


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## Gossip Goat (Nov 19, 2013)

For me it's an insecurity/ self esteem issue. This may not apply to every woman, just me.


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## Madam (Apr 1, 2012)

I do dislike eating in public. Mostly because I'm just hungry and want to eat, and actually enjoy the food, but people are trying to distract me by engaging conversations? Nope, just leave me alone. Food > having a chat. Sometimes of course it's fine, but mostly I prefer to eat alone.


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## ChkChkBoom (Nov 10, 2013)

Arya said:


> I just hope it isn't true that guys don't go for skinny girls.


Guys like all kinds of girls. Everyone has their preference. And who really gives a shit what they like. If you are healthy and happy in your own skin, that's all that matters


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## eunoia (Nov 19, 2010)

FearAndTrembling said:


> I really don't think the cases I've seen were based on body issues.
> 
> Because the particular cases I saw, the women had a plate of food. Everyone saw that these women had food. It wasn't some secret. Everybody knows that was her plate, and she was gonna eat it. And when she hid, when she returned...we would all know that she just finished eat what was on the plate. So if, you don't want people to see you eating. Why even order the food in public? We already know you are gonna eat it.
> 
> I think people may be looking too much into it. I see it more like a bathroom thing. When a woman goes in or comes out of a bathroom, we all know what she did in there. She knows that we know what she did too. It isn't some secret. But it is private. I just see it as a privacy/hygiene thing more than a self-esteem issue. A woman doesn't want me to see her eat for the same reason she doesn't want me to see her floss her teeth, spit or fart. I personally don't do any of those things in front of women either. Now that I think about it, I wouldn't want a woman watching me eat either. lol I wouldn't hide, but it would make me a little uncomfy.


I'm actually confused by this. So..she's out in public, alone, ordering food...and then she takes her plate and hides? And then returns with an empty plate? lol..what is this "hiding?" How is she hiding in public? I'm picturing a woman sneaking off into the hidden back room, scooping food into her face with her hands before she is caught, and then slipping out and destroying the evidence. Or maybe she's in a corner, hunched over under the table and peeking over her shoulder as she frantically puts the food in her mouth. Clarify this "hiding," and maybe I can understand the motives!


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

Fucking ridiculous.

God forbid a women is seen nourishing _herself_! After all, exists solely for the viewing pleasure of others. She's an ornament, not a hu*man*. Ornaments shouldn't be chewing and digesting food, and shouldn't be going against her *obligation* to be stick-thin. And if she's eating a sandwich, well, that's obviously a sammich she didn't make for a MAN! 

yeah, fuck that shit. I'm going to buy myself an enormous burrito and eat it right in the middle of a crowded park. 


Like I do every lunch break. 


Go ahead! Film it!


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## Arya (Oct 17, 2012)

LadyBrave said:


> Guys like all kinds of girls. Everyone has their preference. And who really gives a shit what they like. If you are healthy and happy in your own skin, that's all that matters


Most girls care what they think. That's why they spend hours doing their hair and make-up for them. And then after they spend hours making themselves look nice, they deliver speeches about not caring what guys think and being happy in their own skins. Not saying that's you, but I've seen enough girls do it, that I just laugh at the hypocrisy. It does matter for most of the population, guys or girls, because they don't want to spend their whole life alone, and it doesn't matter how much they try to convince themselves consciously that they are perfectly happy that way. There are always outliers to that of course.


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## ChkChkBoom (Nov 10, 2013)

Arya said:


> Most girls care what they think. That's why they spend hours doing their hair and make-up for them. And then after they spend hours making themselves look nice, they deliver speeches about not caring what guys think and being happy in their own skins. Not saying that's you, but I've seen enough girls do it, that I just laugh at the hypocrisy. It does matter for most of the population, guys or girls, because they don't want to spend their whole life alone, and it doesn't matter how much they try to convince themselves consciously that they are perfectly happy that way. There are always outliers to that of course.


They/you shouldn't care about male opinion to the point of using it to validate self esteem. But I'm aware of the reality that you and many others do.


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## randomshoes (Dec 11, 2013)

Anyone else notice that the pressure on women to be shiny plastic dolls has become so intense that some women are afraid to eat in public because they might look unattractive for five minutes and then be rejected by every man ever and die alone? Am I the only one who's noticed this? I mean, eventually they have to eat in front of you, but then they still pretend that they only use the bathroom for hair-related things? It can't be because women are told they are not supposed to be human beings. Maybe they just don't want us to have to see the food mashing around in their mouth. Of course, everyone gets to see the food mashing around in _our_ mouths, but no one cares about that. Anyway, I think it's kinda cute that some women are so afraid of being rejected by society and/or romantic partners that they worry about this even when they're avoiding starvation or riding themselves of waste. Any suggestions or comments? I'm utterly baffled.


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## INFJRoanna (Dec 20, 2012)

I just don't appreciate people watching me eat, I feel awkward and embarrassed. I don't think it even has anything to do with my body image, I just don't like to be watched whilst I eat. I don't mind eating in front of my fiance, that doesn't occur to me, it's strangers that quite openly stare that weird me out.


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