# Lakigigar's health, sleep and fitness logs



## Lakigigar

Hello, here are my weird sleep logs. I wanted to share them. I will maybe update them as i will sleep more in the upcoming months. I will probably mention it to a doctor... . I suffer most likely from *delayed sleep phase disorder* and maybe even *non-24 hour sleep disorder among sighted people*. 

*Q&A: Delayed sleep phase disorder*
*Q&A: Non-24 hour sleep-wake disorder*

The graphs are not 100% accurate, but they should give you an idea of what my pattern was in the last 13 months. I haven't kept track of my sleep data in all those months. You'll see some larger gaps, those were the moments i thought: "get up and try to keep a normal schedule", but it's just stronger than myself, and if i don't keep track of it, i guess it's even more severe. I have issues with shopping when the stores are open, and being awake for early appointments with repair people and doctors, and also applying for work / working or a social life, and it doesn't help that i have asperger's as well (most likely), add or depression. The one disability enhances the other disability. Smaller gaps (1 or even 2 days) are often all-nighters or going out (you'll see that especially on fridays).

in one picture


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## cuddle bun

oh wow thats fascinating....is it like your circadian clock is more than 24 hours? I read somewhere that most humans have a 25 hour circadian rhythm and I also read that this is one of the supporting reasons people provide when they want to argue that humans are not from earth but transplanted from some other planet 
:laughing:

withholding comment on where humans come from lol but it's fun to read about conspiracy theories for sure. biologically this fascinates me. How long is your "day" ideally ...like what length day would make it feel more natural to sleep at the same time every day?


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## Lakigigar

My life is a mess.

I almost never eat candies (or some forms of meat as well). I just don't realize it, but i'm really an unhealthy eater, because I have no structure and I have no idea what I eat, or on some days, i won't even notice that i haven't eat at all. Like yesterday, i forgot to eat. I didn't make anything ready. I didn't ate. I also didn't ate crisps. I didn't ate cookies. And like i said, i never eat candies, so what did i eat? Apparently, nothing. And i went to bed at 6.15pm, woke up at 4am and i don't think that was very restorative sleep...

On friday, i did eat spaghetti. I'm not sure if i did eat something on thursday. On wednesday, i ate scampi's with tomatosauce and tagliatelle, and on monday (or tuesday), i ate macaroni, but that must have been all i've eaten last week. I never eat breakfast. I never eat twice a day. I don't care when I eat. Sometimes i eat in the middle of the night. On other days, in the middle of the noon, or in the early morning, late evening. I just eat when i want too.

This is going on since my teenager years, since i've never eat breakfast at high school or middle schoool or elementary school either. I just went to school. ... And if i ate breakfast, i often felt nauseated!!!

Since high school, i stopped eating during noon as well and i went to schools without eating in the morning and noon (or something) for several months, and at the end of the day, i ate bread, and the worst of it: YOU DON'T REALIZE you are doing something wrong. It's just seems all normal. The problem is i just don't like to eat in a room where everyone eats, and we were also able to leave school during noon, so i did leave school during noon.

I lost the feeling of being hungry i guess. I can feel extremely hungry, but that's when i didn't eat in days.


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## Lakigigar

I've decided to *change my lifestyle*. I'm going to try to change it abruptly.

As i currently am staying at my foster mom's, i won't start the challenge right now. As i think it will be too much to implement everything, and change everything. I won't take an actual SERIOUS effort to change my sleep patterns (since right now it's not priority.). I would like to receive a lot of support, since i will need it. I will keep everyone updated every day, about what i've done, what my weight is, what i did eat, if i did an exercise, what i did drink, what i did and when i slept. It will be interesting, since my lifestyle is highly unusual. (lol)

*First horde: (start 8 dec 2017)*
- Stop drinking coke
- Stop binge-eating
- Exercising again (arms, belly and legs)

*Second horde: (aim: january 2017)*
- Stop eating meat
- Adopt initially a vegetarian lifestyle (possibly becoming vegan)
- Trying new recipes, and URGE myself to buy new food, to make new recipes and just try to recover./

*Possible later horde*
- Change my sleep patterns, do a seriously effort (i've visited)
- Trying to make me mental healthier (i now that i need to be vegan to at least be satisfied with myself and win SELF CONFIDENCE and LIFE ENERGY back)
- Force myself to have more social contact, enter social groups
- Work / Studying...
- Enter a sport school maybe
- Possibly smoking weed again


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## Lakigigar

More about my eating problems



Lakigigar said:


> I think i'm going to try to stop with my binge eating problems. They started to develop when i didn't eat breakfast AND lunch in school, and i started to feel hungry at night, waking up, and eating things in the refrigerator, just like raw cheese or ham. Anything i could find!!! I also started to play on the computer in the middle of the night (while there was school the day afterwards)... Then my foster parents decided to lock the doors to downstairs when they did found out, lol... This happened until they decided that i had to live on my own, so i never could gain the trust back that i wouldn't eat things in the refrigerator at night... Since i didn't know how to cook stuff, i did resent a bit on fast food or easily prepared food. Over the years this is gone better. I'm highly restrictive on food, since i'm ashamed when i eat things i don't want to eat, and i have something in me that bans all kind of food to prepare or eat for myself. One of those things are candies. I did ban most kinds of meat. Things i don't like as well are coke and crisps, but i still drink and eat them, though i drastically decreased in eating crisps since i don't like them anymore. I still have the habit to go to the shop, and buy the actual foods i use for the meals i prepare, and my actual binge food. When i'm back for the shop, i just eat everything that i have for binge food (usually this is only 1-2 things), and i have some cookies that i save for later. I really don't like it, but it's like an urge. As a result, i usually eat much less in the day (on days i binge eat, i actually eat less than usual, since i don't prepare a meal anymore, since i'm not hungry). As a result, i only eat meals on four or five days in a week. The other days i eat binge food (including coke), or i just eat almost nothing (only surviving the day on a few cookies (since i don't tend to binge eat them). Food that i binge eat is often salmon or ham. I just eat everything immediately when i return from the shop. I should stop buying them...
> 
> I also don't want to drink coke anymore. It actually reduces my hunger, and it gives me energy, reducing my hunger stimulus. On days i drink a lot of coke, i probably won't eat much or at all. But i had felt heart palpitulations after drinking coke, so i'm planning to stop immediately with it. I feel so bad for drinking coke, like it's such a shame. I hate it. It's so unhealthy and so bad, and still i drink coke. I hate it. I had stopped with it for a period two or three years after it, when i also felt ashamed for drinking coke. I've been able to not drink coke for 8-9 months, but i've started to drink Red Bull (and that's even more bad), then i did start drinking red bull and coke, and then i decided to stop drinking red bull, and i'm now red bull free for a year almost.
> 
> When i go to the frietkot (a fastfood restaurant for belgian fries), i went three years ago, two or three times in the week. At my prime, i went two times to it, when i lived in a different city than the place i live now, and on monday, i did eat a third time with my friends. Over the years, this is being reduced to max. once a week. Now i even eat less than once a week. Sometimes i go every week, but in november, i only went twice to the frietkot (once in the beginning in the month, and two weeks ago on sunday).
> 
> The problem is that i'm also an emotional eater. When i'm obsessed with a certain kind of thing, i'm less likely to take the time to prepare a meal or eat. When i'm feeling down and depressed, i'm also likely to eat something, and when i'm low on energy, i'm more likely to overeat (and feel guilty for the unhealthiness those foods contain...). I also haven't been able to develop an alternative (vegetarian) lifestyle where i just have the discipline to prepare a meal every day (or even more) that is healthy. I'm really hesitant on trying new foods or preparing new meals (fear of failure, or just don't know them enough -> related to asperger's or autism spectrum disorder), and since i ban more & more food, and don't replace them, it probably is now even unhealthier than before (however i really need to stop binge eating and drinking coke). I'm afraid that i don't eat varied enough. I have a certain list of safe foods that i can use or feel comfortable with it, it's actually even lower than that (because of shame foods, or not being 100% comfortable with some "safe foods" either).
> 
> *safe foods:* broccoli, spinach, spaghetti, tagliatelle, macaroni, pesto, penne, rice, basmati rice, cheese, milk, pepper, salt, hot spices, bacon, eggs, ham, salmon, chicken filet, sausages, chipolata, cookies, crisps, curry sauce, fruit juice, tropical juice, coke, beer and and french fries with a snack in the frietkot), and of course our holy water
> 
> The coke, meat are shame foods. Cookies also a bit but not really a priority. I wouldn't _ban_ it. Beer also, but i'm not addicted to beer (as opposed to coke)
> 
> I'm trying to expand this list, but it is really hard for me, to change habits and feel comfortable to prepare food with other things. The list is also a bit complicated. I have used more stuff, but i'm not comfortable with it, and this caused me to use it once. Also, there are certain kinds of meat in the list, but because of my shame / guilt feeling for eating meat, i've barely eaten meat in the last 9 months. I've eaten sausages once or twice max. I haven't eaten schnitzel in that period. I haven't eaten other meat i used to eat in that period (schnitzel, cordon blue and a different variation on chicken). I used to eat MUCH MORE MEAT in 2016 and even more meat in 2015. I wasn't planning on becoming vegan then, but it is gotten reduced to the point i rarely eat meat.
> 
> I've also made spaghetti bolognese but i'm not comfortable with making it too (this includes much more vegetables and minced meat), and i prepare it once every three months (and save it for the future).
> 
> I used to eat bread and hotdogs (with sandwich) too, but i also don't do this anymore, since i lied once in the bakery, and i'm now afraid to go. I don't go to the bakery, and i don't buy bread in the grocery shop for several reasons (unpractical to buy it, i have never something to eat with it (since i binge eat that), it's bad really quickly (hard) and i tend to overeat bread too.
> 
> All other kinds of food is stuff i haven't eaten in years (or months), except when i wasn't sporadically at home. I sometimes change food patterns (but it is often reducing, reducing and not replacing with something else), though i have been able to prepare more food by myself than previously. Now i almost always prepare the food i eat by myself (although not varied enough, because it are *always* pasta or rice recipes). I already banned a lot of unhealthy habits i've done years ago, but i still need much change. I did eat less unhealthy stuff, but I also eat less in general (and probably chronically underfed)
> 
> I never eat: beef, pie, ice, candies, food i don't know (lol, and that's a lot), potatoes (or drinking stuff i haven't named)
> 
> I almost never eat: chocolate, pork foods i haven't named, bread, most vegetables, most fruits, cake
> 
> I did develop problems because of not eating breakfast (never), because i simply had too much stress to eat (and preferred an anti-stress shower, or to lay in bed for as long as possible), and anxieties of eating at noon (lunch at school), because of overcrowded lunch rooms and separation anxiety. This really fucked me up. I know that i didn't eat almost anything at school for a very long period of time (months in a row). I also had no snacks, or fruit, or cookies for during the pauses. I just didn't eat at all until 6 pm (eating bread with something on it), and then developing night eating syndrome, the doors were closed, and i continued like this. I sometimes was also too lazy to prepare lunch in the morning, and ended up eating nothing too, when my parents decided i had to eat lunch instead of eating a full meal at school.
> 
> I also was very heady, and i've stated against my parents that i won't eat their food as long i wasn't allowed to be vegetarian (and i had i want to be a vegetarian-crisises multiple times in my life), causing me to vast on those times too when i was young, lol, because i didn't want to hurt animals anymore!!!
> 
> It's not an eating disorder of course, but I wished i had less problems maintaining a healthy lifestyle. It's really hard, and i think this all makes me unhealthy. It causes me to be ashamed of insecure in general too. (one of the many reasons). The pressure of other people being full vegan and i'm still not, is hard. I feel like i'm betraying myself or lying against myself or being hypocrite for not being a vegan, but still being a climate activist.


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## Lakigigar

Not sure about beginning december, but i know that i must have had less weight, since my pants was sliding off all the time, i really had a bad time, not eating a lot end nov and beginning dec.

*Logs for 4/12/2017:*
Woke up: 4am (8 hours of sleep)
Did eat:
1) chicken filet, rice and curry sauce in the morning
2) 2 frangipagnes (cookies)
3) chicken filet, rice and curry in the evening (i had too much of it, and didn't want to throw it away)
4) 1,5 liter of coke
5) some fruit juice
Went to bed: 8pm

*Logs for 5/12/2017:*
Woke up: 5am (9 hours of sleep)
Did eat: 1) spaghetti, bacon and eggs in the morning
2) 2 frangipagnes (cookies)
3) some fruit juice
Went to bed: 10.15pm

*Logs for 6/12/2017:* (i'm now at my mom, so this sounds healthier)
Weight in the morning: 62,4 kg or 137,5 lbs / 1,85 cm or 6,1 feet tall / BMI = 18,2. (i expect this will go up to 18,5 at least). I also did check measure my waist (it's 69 cm / 27 inches), and my waist-to-height ratio was 0,37 (not enough). I did that however after i had my lunch (in the noon).
Woke up: 6am (7,45 hours of sleep)
Did eat:
5 chicken drumsticks and apple sauce at noon
3 croque monsieurs in the evening
0,6l of coke
So far 0,3l of beer (i will at least drink one beer more, and possibly another one. 0,6l or 1l beer.
Planning to go to bed around 10/11pm (not tired yet, 7.30pm)

Tomorrow will be another "healthier day", and also one of the last times i will eat meat, and from 8/12 i will start the challenge. So wish me luck


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 7/12/2017:*
Woke up: 8.45 am (went to bed 10.30 pm) -> 10.15 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 62,1 kg (-0,3) or 137 lbs (-0.5 lbs) / BMI = 18,1 (-0,1) for a height of 6'1 or 185 cm
Did eat:
1) schnitzel (no vegetables, threw them away because they were soft (canned/tinned food) and almost no appetite)
2) apple sauce at 4pm
3) 2 hotdogs with ketchup
4) 1 self-made choco mousse (the other three ones are for my mom)
5) 0,6 l of coke
6) 0,6 l of beer (i sticked with 0,3l of beer yesterday)
7) 2 glasses of water

I'm going home tomorrow, so from that point, i won't drink coke again anymore, and i won't eat meat often anymore back again.

I was a bit surprised i lost weight this morning, since I did eat well enough yesterday (i did eat A LOT yesterday). I will probably gain a bit tomorrow, would be a bit surprised if not.


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 8/12/2017*
Woke up at 8.30 am (went to bed at 23.30 pm) -> 9 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 62,4 kg (+0.3) or 137.5 lbs (+0.5) / BMI= 18.2 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Made a walk (with small interludes of running) of 40 minutes this morning unintentionally
Did eat:
1) Six glasses of water
2) 100 or 150 grams spaghetti with spinach (forgot the bit of cheese on top) - +- 600-700 kcal at 4pm

As expected, i got the weight of yesterday back. I didn't had much appetite today. I felt miserable and weak. I almost had to faint (after i did ate) when doing the dishes, and i feel weakness in my legs. I think i will have lost weight tomorrow, don't know how much. Tomorrow could be another unhealthy day. I have plenty of food at home, but I expect it to become a very stressed day, so the potential for not eating at all is apparent. I'm glad i didn't have binges or an urge to buy / drink coke today, so i'm might now be officially one day coke free. Hurray! I also didn't eat meat today, but i don't have to plans to stop completely at this point, since it would be a step too much, however i'm trying to lower the amount of meat i eat, even more at least.

I did post *my groceries* here in another thread, and since the thread obviously failed, i will post them here, since they contribute a large section to my eating behavior anyway.


* *




"I just went, and i bought this. I panicked-buy the cookies and the fruit juice, but i'm honestly a bit relieved that i have them in case of emergency, because i stopped buying coke, and if i really wanted to drink coke, i can drink fruit juice (it has a lot of calories of course... ). I have no idea how to replace the drinks, maybe i have to drink tea again. But i think i just prefer water for now, and maybe a glass of fruit juice in the morning. The cookies are also in case of emergency (i used to eat them always), but since i didn't buy my binge food (salmon or ham), i have them in case i need them. I also have one sack of crisps, but I prefer not to touch them. I haven't touch it for almost a month. I just don't like the taste of crisps anymore...

I have bought some pasta (penne and macaroni). I had more than enough spaghetti or tagliatelle or whatever, although i eat +- 500 grams of spaghetti in a week.










What i planned to eat:

today - spaghetti spinach (i have more than enough spinach here)
tomorrow: - spaghetti bolognese (i've premade bolognese here)
sunday: macaroni with cheese & ham (i have ham and cheese here)
monday: creamy tomato pasta (with the cheese and the tomato sauce i have bought)

I don't have a lot of snacks (everything is gross  ) or breakfast (i didn't know what to buy) and i only have planned one large meal for one day (if i'm, hungry, i can always eat pasta again). It's possible i also will go out today or tomorrow, not sure. There is something to do here in the town, and i want to flee (because of my social anxiety). It's christmas market, and i think i hate that (or that i wouldn't like the noise). That also could abruptly change my eat patterns. Anxiety is more than likely to struck me (and than i won't eat anything...)

it's now 2.26pm and i haven't eat or drink yet today aside from one glass of water. I also did lock myself up earlier today, so i've made an unprepared long walk this morning, lol, but i liked it (although COLD, COLD, FREAKING COLD)."


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 9/12/2017*
Woke up at 9am (went to bed at 12pm) -> 9 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 61.3 kg (-1.1 kg) or 135.1 lbs (-2.4 lbs) / BMI= 17.9 (-0.3) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat:
1) 200 grams Spaghetti bolognese - approximately 1500 kcal (more spaghetti than yesterday, and of course didn't include the sauce). Did eat it around 2-3 pm.
2) 6 glasses of water.

Training:
- One cardio session of 1 hour running and walking: The circumstances (cold, pains, crowdedness close to where i live) made it a hard training. It was simply a hard training, but i could run for a bit, without stopping, so that at least makes me happy. The fact that i was moving for an hour, makes me also happy. I think i might have lost 400-500 kcal here.

Pretty big weight drop, and even more than I expected/hoped for. I was actually happy with that (i'm supposed not to be happy with it, but okay). Today, i did ate the spaghetti bolognese, but since I had the feeling that it was a lot of food, i decided to exercise a bit to at least use a bit of calories, and increase metabolism. I've a feeling that my body wants to balance everything. I want to flatten out all binge episodes (or episodes of overeating) for some reason, to make those overeating episodes a bit more regular. I wouldn't say that my meal of 1500 kcal was a binge, but it was a pretty big meal, and i wanted to flatten it out, and the only way to burn those calories is when you sport.

In the evening, i didn't eat anything else since i had no appetite, i was stressed because of a socially event outside close to where i live and i didn't want to eat anything else anymore after what i've eaten this noon...


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 10/12/2017*
Woke up at 10am (went to bed at 12pm) -> 10 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 61.5 kg (+0.2 kg) or 135.5 lbs (+0.4 lbs) / BMI= 18.0 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat:
1) 5-6 glasses of water
2) a variation of this recipe without the spinach, penne with a creamy cheesy tomato sauce. Did eat it around 2pm










Wouldn't say the food i prepared was, exactly what i wanted (i probably used a bit too much tomato pasta or the heat was not high enough, and i also underestimated how much time the cheese needed to melt), but overall it was okay. I just would have preferred to have a bit less tomato pasta in it, and a more oranger colour (could have used "cream"). There were more little work points, but it's the first time i've made it, so i was happy. I didn't add spinach, since the sauce was probably not going to be perfect, and i didn't have fresh spinach in house (i only have deep freeze spinach).

An okay-ish day.


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## Lakigigar

Also, i would really much appreciate it of people give me tips for low cal and easy-to-prepare foods to eat as snacks, evening meal (or as breakfast)? I'm probably going to buy some yoghurt next time when i do some grocery shopping. I'm making a list of what i need, and some ideas. I've also considered apples in the oven...  Any help would be very much appreciated! Thank you


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 11/12/2017*
Woke up at 8am, went to bed at little bit before 1am -> 7 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 61.0 kg (-0.5 kg) or 134.5 lbs (-1.0 lbs) / BMI= 17.8 (-0.2) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat: 
1) 4-5 glasses of water
2) 3/4 of an ovendish macaroni with cheese & ham at 12am
3) 1/4 of an ovendish macaroni with cheese & ham at 5pm
4) ADDED LATER: 4 cookies (binge  i had too eat)
5) ADDED LATER: 0.3l of beer
(+- 3000 kcal)

Did exercise;
1) a walk of 30 minutes in the morning between +- 10.30 and 11am
2) a walk of 75 minutes in the afternoon somewhere between 1 and 3 pm.
In total: +- 600 kcal (cold weather must have burned cals too)

I've lost a bit of weight this morning again. I probably am now at my all-time low BMI since i'm an adult (17.8), though i will most likely recover to a higher weight tomorrow, and i'm planning to eat a lot tomorrow too. As far as i know i've never had a BMI higher than 20 or most likely even 19, and according to BBMI (Better BMI Measurement), i've even had underweight for my entire life. That's weird, since my parents always have known me as someone who can eat everything, and who can eat a lot, and has a big stomach to storage food in. My dad said that i ate an insanely huge amount of mussels when I was 3 or 4 years old, and everyone has always known me as a big eater, but i must probably have a very fast metabolism or something is wrong.

The heavy chest pains that I experience, and became worse or more apparent when I lost a tiny bit more weight last week, are also a bit worrying. I'm not sure if it is weight-related. It shares many of the symptoms of Precordial Catch Syndrome, and that's a common but not dangerous condition that occurs frequently among children and also adolescents but not among adults (what's a bit weird, since i'm an adult). They also usually last only a few seconds, while when I experience them, they usually go on for minutes and a quarter. I've even had shortness of breath for four hours because of it and some said that it was a panic attack, but right then there was no reason for me to have a panic attack. I had on two times chest pains saturday (once just after i've eaten and once a very painful episode in the evening). It's on the left-side, and it's a stabbing chest pain. It occurs also frequently when I run (in 50% of the cases). I'm not sure if it does happen because of bad timing with when i've eaten food (i still don't know *when* i have to run.) or that it could be the spleen. It's just annoying. The pain itself is described quite similar as the Precordial Catch Syndrome, but it lasts longer, and i'm an adult, and it doesn't mension that it occurs frequently when doing sports, or that sports is a trigger. I'm not sure if those chest pains are weight-related, PCS-related or that there is a different cause (one that could even be more worrying), like possibly a form of pericarditis or a different disease on heart, ribs or lungs. It actually worries me, since PCS does not entirely describe my symptoms. But no other disease does it better, so i'm sticking with that.

Also, i've noticed constipation because I probably haven't eaten enough, the feeling you will faint soon (but i'll never faint), weakness in upper legs/thigs, palpitations and (orthostatic) hypotension. I'll also have a very slow heart rate (+- 45 bpm), though i haven't check it recently. I obviously have fast metabolistic rates, and i'm not sure what causes it. It is a symptom of hyperthyroidism, but this also includes high blood pressure and a fast heart rate, and i have the oppositie. Hypothyroidism on the other hand makes you more likely to be fatter. It's a bit weird, but okay. I'm not really keen on checking it with the doctor since the last times i went, i always worried about nothing.

I've also checked the BBMI, the better BMI calculator, better adjusted for tall and short people.










Compare to that that my body fast percentage and my waist size are very low, because a lot of pounds/kg's are just muscles in my legs, and not fat, and the situation could be even more problematic. I've also *read on reddit* that tall, thin young white males are also more likely to have spontaneous pneumothoraxes. And i even thought that i once had that because i had those chest pains and a shortness of breath, but after four hours, it did stop... , and then everyone told me that this was a panic attack. It worries me a bit...

@Blizzard


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## Electra

Lakigistar said:


> *Logs for 11/12/2017*
> Woke up at 8am, went to bed at little bit before 1am -> 7 hours of sleep
> Weight in the morning: 61.0 kg (-0.5 kg) or 134.5 lbs (-1.0 lbs) / BMI= 17.8 (-0.2) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
> 
> Did eat:
> 1) 4-5 glasses of water
> 2) 3/4 of an ovendish macaroni with cheese & ham at 12am
> 3) 1/4 of an ovendish macaroni with cheese & ham at 5pm
> (2000 kcal)
> 
> Did exercise;
> 1) a walk of 30 minutes in the morning between +- 10.30 and 11am
> 2) a walk of 75 minutes in the afternoon somewhere between 1 and 3 pm.
> In total: +- 600 kcal (cold weather must have burned cals too)
> 
> I've lost a bit of weight this morning again. I probably am now at my all-time low BMI since i'm an adult (17.8), though i will most likely recover to a higher weight tomorrow, and i'm planning to eat a lot tomorrow too. As far as i know i've never had a BMI higher than 20 or most likely even 19, and according to BBMI (Better BMI Measurement), i've even had underweight for my entire life. That's weird, since my parents always have known me as someone who can eat everything, and who can eat a lot, and has a big stomach to storage food in. My dad said that i ate an insanely huge amount of mussels when I was 3 or 4 years old, and everyone has always known me as a big eater, but i must probably have a very fast metabolism or something is wrong.
> 
> The heavy chest pains that I experience, and became worse or more apparent when I lost a tiny bit more weight last week, are also a bit worrying. I'm not sure if it is weight-related. It shares many of the symptoms of Precordial Catch Syndrome, and that's a common but not dangerous condition that occurs frequently among children and also adolescents but not among adults (what's a bit weird, since i'm an adult). They also usually last only a few seconds, while when I experience them, they usually go on for minutes and a quarter. I've even had shortness of breath for four hours because of it and some said that it was a panic attack, but right then there was no reason for me to have a panic attack. I had on two times chest pains saturday (once just after i've eaten and once a very painful episode in the evening). It's on the left-side, and it's a stabbing chest pain. It occurs also frequently when I run (in 50% of the cases). I'm not sure if it does happen because of bad timing with when i've eaten food (i still don't know *when* i have to run.) or that it could be the spleen. It's just annoying. The pain itself is described quite similar as the Precordial Catch Syndrome, but it lasts longer, and i'm an adult, and it doesn't mension that it occurs frequently when doing sports, or that sports is a trigger. I'm not sure if those chest pains are weight-related, PCS-related or that there is a different cause (one that could even be more worrying), like possibly a form of pericarditis or a different disease on heart, ribs or lungs. It actually worries me, since PCS does not entirely describe my symptoms. But no other disease does it better, so i'm sticking with that.
> 
> Also, i've noticed constipation because I probably haven't eaten enough, the feeling you will faint soon (but i'll never faint), weakness in upper legs/thigs, palpitations and (orthostatic) hypotension. I'll also have a very slow heart rate (+- 45 bpm), though i haven't check it recently. I obviously have fast metabolistic rates, and i'm not sure what causes it. It is a symptom of hyperthyroidism, but this also includes high blood pressure and a fast heart rate, and i have the oppositie. Hypothyroidism on the other hand makes you more likely to be fatter. It's a bit weird, but okay. I'm not really keen on checking it with the doctor since the last times i went, i always worried about nothing.
> 
> I've also checked the BBMI, the better BMI calculator, better adjusted for tall and short people.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Compare to that that my body fast percentage and my waist size are very low, because a lot of pounds/kg's are just muscles in my legs, and not fat, and the situation could be even more problematic. I've also *read on reddit* that tall, thin young white males are also more likely to have spontaneous pneumothoraxes. And i even thought that i once had that because i had those chest pains and a shortness of breath, but after four hours, it did stop... , and then everyone told me that this was a panic attack. It worries me a bit...
> 
> @Blizzard


Wow you weigh less then me  I have hypothyreodism. (low metabolism). So you are not sitting in any special positions when the chest pain happens? Any tight clothing? I insist you see the doctor!!!! I think you need to get a full blood test for all the vitamins, minerals proteins, fat, liquid and iron, and make sure you get enough calories each day.


----------



## Lakigigar

Blizzard said:


> Wow you weigh less then me  I have hypothyreodism. (low metabolism). So you are not sitting in any special positions when the chest pain happens? Any tight clothing? I insist you see the doctor!!!! I think you need to get a full blood test for all the vitamins, minerals proteins, fat, liquid and iron, and make sure you get enough calories each day.


I have had them while running. I've had them while i sat or just was standing. I've had them after i've eaten. I've had them in the late evening (sometimes after excitement or stress). Stress, excitement and exertion seems to be triggers. I've had them in pajama's or naked too, so it's not tight clothing.


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## Electra

Lakigistar said:


> I have had them while running. I've had them while i sat or just was standing. I've had them after i've eaten. I've had them in the late evening (sometimes after excitement or stress). Stress, excitement and exertion seems to be triggers. I've had them in pajama's or naked too, so it's not tight clothing.


This is very mysterious...


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 12/12/2017*
Woke up at 10am (went to bed at 11.30pm) -> 10.5 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 61.4 kg (+0.4 kg) or 135.4 lbs (+0.9 lbs) / BMI= 17.9 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat:
1) Spaghetti with tomato sauce and creemy cheese (some leftovers from sunday, but i didn't like it, i'm not going to make it again probably)
2) Oven dish with salmon, a sauce with mainly milk & mascarpone cheese and spinach.










3) 3 yoghurts

Will probably gain a lot of weight back again, but i'm a bit disappointed. I can feel that i won't eat much tomorrow already... , and there is some trouble in the making for thursday & friday too. I'm not sure what to do actually. I'm sure i will gain a lot of weight tomorrow, and i'm actually not so keen on that. Normally i have the tradition to eat belgian fries on either wednesday evening or thursday evening, but I usually buy snacks there with meat there, so that's a lot of calories, but most importantly it's against future rules, and it feels kinda weird to just go to buy only french fries. That feels really weird... . I'm not sure what to do. But anyway the most important rule was to stop drinking coke, and i'm currently succeeding in that. I'm not even craving for it, but i'm craving for so much different food. It feels like I used coke to reduce my appetite, or that coke actually reduced my hunger appetite without me knowing it. We will see.

I also feel kinda weak. My stomach and bowel movements just aren't that good today. I feel like shit. I also feel fat... when i touch my tummy or check the scale...


----------



## Electra

Lakigistar said:


> *Logs for 12/12/2017*
> Woke up at 10am (went to bed at 11.30pm) -> 10.5 hours of sleep
> Weight in the morning: 61.4 kg (+0.4 kg) or 135.4 lbs (+0.9 lbs) / BMI= 17.9 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
> 
> Did eat:
> 1) Spaghetti with tomato sauce and creemy cheese (some leftovers from sunday, but i didn't like it, i'm not going to make it again probably)
> 2) Oven dish with salmon, a sauce with mainly milk & mascarpone cheese and spinach.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 3) 2 yoghurts
> 
> Will probably gain a lot of weight back again, but i'm a bit disappointed. I can feel that i won't eat much tomorrow already... , and there is some trouble in the making for thursday & friday too. I'm not sure what to do actually. I'm sure i will gain a lot of weight tomorrow, and i'm actually not so keen on that. Normally i have the tradition to eat belgian fries on either wednesday evening or thursday evening, but I usually buy snacks there with meat there, so that's a lot of calories, but most importantly it's against future rules, and it feels kinda weird to just go to buy only french fries. That feels really weird... . I'm not sure what to do. But anyway the most important rule was to stop drinking coke, and i'm currently succeeding in that. I'm not even craving for it, but i'm craving for so much different food. It feels like I used coke to reduce my appetite, or that coke actually reduced my hunger appetite without me knowing it. We will see.
> 
> I also feel kinda weak. My stomach and bowel movements just aren't that good today. I feel like shit. I also feel fat... when i touch my tummy or check the scale...


Do you drink enough water so that you don't become dihydrated? Could it be a side effect of medication? I wish you please see a doctor...


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## Lakigigar

I don't use medication. I drink enough water, so those are not the problems. I'm not sure what it is... and i'm not even sure if it's worth going to the doctor for. I went to her for my sleep problems and she said there is not much i can do for you... Maybe, you'll have to apply for a night job. @Blizzard If i will get that same kind of reaction for my chest pains and whatever, she will probably tell, it's nothing bad, maybe it's just stress or anxiety... Well, why should i even go then. It's pointless. I did lab tests last year, and they were good.


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 13/12/2017*
Woke up at 10.30am (went to bed at 1am) -> 9.5 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 61.8 kg (+0.4 kg) or 136.2 lbs (+0.8 lbs) / BMI= 18.1 (+0.2) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat:
1) 3 yoghurts
2) water
3) Belgian fries with two snacks in the evening... (-> fast food ...) at 9pm

Not so happy with what i've eaten, but i really craved for it... and i hadn't eaten until this evening, but okay. It wouldn't even surprise me if i did lose some weight tomorrow despite eating fast food but okay. Tomorrow and friday will definitely be low cal days now!!! I also don't understand why i sleep that long. It looks like my sleep times have increased a fair bit. Yesterday, i slept 10 and a half hour. Now 9 and a half hour. I'm just tired a lot lately...


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## Electra

Lakigistar said:


> *Logs for 13/12/2017*
> Woke up at 10.30am (went to bed at 1am) -> 9.5 hours of sleep
> Weight in the morning: 61.8 kg (+0.4 kg) or 136.2 lbs (+0.8 lbs) / BMI= 18.1 (+0.2) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
> 
> Did eat:
> 1) 3 yoghurts
> 2) water
> 3) Belgian fries with two snacks in the evening... (-> fast food ...) at 9pm
> 
> Not so happy with what i've eaten, but i really craved for it... and i hadn't eaten until this evening, but okay. It wouldn't even surprise me if i did lose some weight tomorrow despite eating fast food but okay. Tomorrow and friday will definitely be low cal days now!!! I also don't understand why i sleep that long. It looks like my sleep times have increased a fair bit. Yesterday, i slept 10 and a half hour. Now 9 and a half hour. I'm just tired a lot lately...


But hunny, you are not just your outer side. You are valuable on the inside. Your personality is more important then your looks. I don't want you to get sick for looking good. :hug:


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 14/12/2017
*Woke up: 11 am (went to bed at 1.30am) -> 9.5 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 61.9 kg (+0.1 kg) or 136.5 lbs (+0.3 lbs) / BMI= 18.1 (+0.0) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat:
1) 1 yoghurt (54 kcal)
2) water


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## Monadnock

Laki, you mentioned in your post from December 8 that you want to exercise your arms. Your intention is to increase your upper body strength, correct? If so, with your permission, I'd like to post a couple of exercises for you in this thread, from my strength training routine. Lemme know if that's okay. -Mon


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## Electra

Lakigistar said:


> *Logs for 14/12/2017
> * BMI= 18.1
> Hunny, you are_ to thin_
> 
> You should be between 25 and 29,9
> 
> Please take are of your self :heart:
> 
> Plase understand that your attraction is not mainly based on your apearence but your psyche


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 15/12/2017*
Woke up: 9 am (went to bed at 1.30am) -> 7.5 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 60.8 kg (-1.1 kg) or 134 lbs (-2.5 lbs) / BMI= 17.8 (-0.3) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat: (probably between 2000 and 3000 kcal)
1) spaghetti carbonara (with bacon & eggs) around 11am
2) 4 yoghurts
3) 8 small cookies (with jam)
4) 200 grams smoked salmon 
5) water

I did eat a lot today again, but okay... I'm probably going to the bakery tomorrow. I did some grocery shopping too today. I didn't buy that much, a bit of beer (that i don't use to drink anyway a lot recently), some new yoghurts, new cookies, the smoked salmon, some spaghetti and some ingredients to make macaroni again later next week.


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 16/12/2017*
Woke up: 11.30 am (went to bed at 2am) -> 9.5 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 61.3 kg (+0.5 kg) or 135.1 lbs (+1.1 lbs) / BMI= 17.9 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat: (probably between 2000 and 3000 kcal)
1) spaghetti spinach - 700/800 kcal (could have been less, i'm not sure).
2) 3 yoghurts - 162 kcal
3) 1 frangipane (cookie) - 228 kcal (52 grams)
4) water
Total: +- 1200 kcal

I'm probably going to buy a scale to measure the weight and calories of my food. It's also good to have it when you prepare new recipes. I went today to the bakery, but it was closed, lol. FAIL. I would have eaten a lot more if it wasn't. I don't understand since it was supposed to be open, but okay...


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 17/12/2017*
Woke up: 12am (went to bed at 3.30am) -> 8.5 hours of sleep
Weight in the morning: 60.9 kg (-0.4 kg) or 134.3 lbs (-0.8 lbs) / BMI= 17.8 (-0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1

Did eat: 
1) water

I didn't eat today... . I will try to eat something tomorrow. I have no inspiration on what to cook or eat, but i will probably try to eat some spaghetti carbonara (i must because of the expire date of the eggs), and i actually would like to have some bread too, but i don't know if the bakery is open... .


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 18/12/2017*
Slept from 3.30am to 7am and from 10am to 1pm, total sleep time of 6.30 hours (stress, hunger and noise kept me awake -> bad night)
Weight in the morning: 60.1 kg (-0.8 kg) or 132.5 lbs (-1.8 lbs) / BMI= 17.6 (-0.2) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
1) spaghetti carbonara
2) 3 cookies
3) 4 yoghurts
4) water

Rough night, also because of the planned power breakdown, the hunger or awkwardness when i side on my left and all the noise in the morning (though would have slept through it normally). I also wasn't that tired. I went a bit earlier to my bed (3am) but it took a while before i felt asleep. It must have been a bit later than 3.30 am probably. Could have been 4am too. I was awake at 7 am, did weigh myself, eat something, and went to bed but couldn't fall asleep back again, so i woke up but decided to sleep again later to fall asleep easier, and get awake at 1am. I could have slept longer than 1am because i finally got in a deeper sleep and slept better from 10am to 1pm. I did weigh myself again (not sure if i did drink some water), and i had the same weight as in the morning (60.1 kg). 

I've eaten the spaghetti carbonara in a different way than i used to eat it, and i've the feeling it was much better, and i'm going to use this method from now on (i've seen some youtube video), and it works. I used a lot of spaghetti and there is also bacon and cheese, so this is actually a calorie bomb, and i was surprised (i did weigh myself again) to see after i've eaten it that i only gained 0.2 kg. So weird... . (60.3 kg). My body just really reacts very weird on everything. Maybe i had more water weight than i've expected this morning, or did stress did do something. I also couldn't go to the toilet in days now... again. That's also annoying. I've also noticed that my hips really thinned a lot (when i pull on my pants). My legs look amazing though... i think i have the ideal weight for marathon running since i don't have to carry a lot of weight, but i'm still able to use / generate / create a lot of power with my legs. This could maybe even underestimate my underweight... (just like the tall / thin ratio is also a bit worrying). 

My better BMI calculator is now at 16.8 ...










and the smart body mass index is now calculated as 16/70.










SBMI = 16/70. This assessment is based on the newly developed Smart Body Mass Index. Its ideal range is between 30/70 and 39/70. Your Smart Body Mass Index (SBMI) is calculated as 16/70 or "16 points out of 70".










A really low score and i was a bit surprising, but apparently it says this... . "In both cases, the risk curves for men and women differ because the study results show that women can tolerate more overweight and underweight than men.", so because of this i'm now classified as being anorexic to being underweight. So weird... .

I've checked this site, and it says i need to gain 15 kg (or even 20 kg) or between 30 and 45 pound. That's going to be hard, because if you overeat by 500 calories every day (and don't take in account that i exercise) you only gain one pound a week on average, meaning that recovery would take 30 to 50 weeks, and we all know i can't eat 2500 to 3000 kilocalories every day. That's just impossible...


----------



## Lakigigar

*Logs for 19/12/2017*
Slept from 3am to 10am (-> 7 hours of sleep, though not continuously, since I was waken up at 6.30am (because of noise on the streets) and on 10am (the postman did call on my door because he had to deliver a brief)
Weight in the morning: 60.2 kg (+0.1 kg) or 132.7 lbs (+0.2 lbs) / BMI= 17.6 (+0.0) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
1) A sandwich with ham, cheese, salad, tomatoes and cocktail - 800/900 kcal
2) 4 yoghurts - 216 kcal
3) 250 grams of crisps - +-1250 kcal

I swear to god i'll never touch a crisp again. I used to like them so much, especially years ago or during my childhood but over the last months i just did eat less and less crisps. I bought a sack of potato chips a month ago or even longer ago. I haven't touch it (even when i binged or semi-binged since i never eat 2500+ kcals during a binge). I just binged it today, and i think it was the worst binge ever. They just didn't taste very well anymore. It's not that the chips were bad. It's just that i just don't like them, that I absolutely hate them, that i will never, never, never eat them again (even if offered, even i'm being paid for), and i absolutely don't like them. I call it a lesson of 1250 calories lol. It's the last thing on Earth i want to eat again in my life.


----------



## Lakigigar

*Logs for 20/12/2017*
Slept from 3.30am to 1pm - 9.5 hours of total sleep
Weight in the morning: 60.5 kg (+0.3 kg) or 133.4 lbs (+0.7 lbs) / BMI= 17.7 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1 
Did eat:
smoked salmon (200 grams) - 390 kcal
8 cookies / frangipagnes - 1824 kcal
4 yoghurts - 216 kcal
TOTAL: 2430 kcal

I was really stressed when I did some shopping, so i didn't buy everything i wanted to buy. I actually also need to go to the other shop because they offer more foods and variation (and some stuff i need i guess they don't have in the shop i go more often to). It was also too late (and i was to stressed) to make a decent meal (and i was still too stressed). This also doesn't work. I keep binging the food, and i also have the feeling that when i eat a yoghurt that i always need more... . It just doesn't work. I wanted to make an oven dish with some red cabbage, mashed potatoes and some minced meat, but i will make this for tomorrow now, and it is also going to be the only thing i'm going to eat tomorrow. 

I have some macaroni at home, so i will at least make that this weekend probably. I also want to eat some chicken filet with rice & curry again, so i will probably buy that next time i'm going to the grocery shop (and that will be friday) and i'm checking if i can eat / try something else this weekend. I also forgot to buy pinda cheese. I wanted to try that.

I don't know what i'm going to do on Christmas. I was invited at my foster family, but I declined the invitation, since i don't want to celebrate christmas actually. It's pointless. I haven't done it either last year, and i felt great. I also got invited by a friend to do something with old years eve, but i'm not really sure like, i'm not the type of person to go a club or bar... 

This weekend a friend will also probably come & be around here for a few days. I'm not really sure what to do, since this also would ruin my planning. He also does eat not a lot when he is here (and i tend to eat even less then). I'm probably just going to buy a bread on saturday morning (or even friday). I can also make macaroni with cheese & ham for two persons, that would be a great idea, but i'm also REALLY NERVOUS if i cook food for someone else. I don't think i've ever done that. He usually takes his own food, and buy a pizza in the grocery shop when he is around here for three days (the whole weekend).

Yesterday:









A lack of sugar and proteins...

Today:









That sodium... Again a lack of proteins


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 21/12/2017*
Slept from 4.30am to 1pm (-> 8.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 61.1 kg (+0.6 kg) or 134.7 lbs (+1.3 lbs) / BMI= 17.8 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
oven dish with red cabbage, mashed potatoes and minced meat
6 yoghurts...

I'm not sure what i'm going to eat tomorrow (or do).


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 22/12/2017*
Slept from 4.30am to 1pm (-> 8.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 61.2 kg (+0.1 kg) or 134.9 lbs (+0.2 lbs) / BMI= 17.9 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
24 slices of bread
An entire jar of _speculoos_ pasta
Total of 4000 kcal...

Again, not sure what to do tomorrow.


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 23/12/2017*
Slept from 5.30am to 2pm (-> 8.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 61.5 kg (+0.3 kg) or 135.6 lbs (+0.7 lbs) / BMI= 18.0 (+0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
spaghetti with spinach (around 700 - 800 kcal)










Not a lot of fat, proteins and sugar...


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 24/12/2017*
Slept from 7am to 2pm (-> 7 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 61.2 kg (-0.3 kg) or 134.9 lbs (-0.7 lbs) / BMI= 17.9 (-0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
Macaroni with cheese & ham
water


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 25/12/2017*
Slept from 8am to 4.30pm (-> 8.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.7 kg (-0.5 kg) or 133.8 lbs (-1.1 lbs) / BMI= 17.7 (-0.2) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
water fast

The christmas period just bring a lot of stress with them, and i will be more than happy when everything turns normal again. I'm also in a weird sleep phase where i don't see daylight during the day, since i just sleep through it... This makes it hard for me to do some grocery shopping at acceptable times or to prepare food when there is light. I didn't spent the holidays with people, family or friends (i also preferred it that way for certain reasons). The friend that was going to come during the weekend also cancelled. The festival of light is more like the festival of darkness for me. I will be really glad when it is 3 january, and everything is normal, and i will have some breathing time at the end of the week too (though all the wind is annoying).

Some additional graphs. I'm a bit low on proteins and sugar (and actually also carbs).


----------



## Chased

Seems like a pointless thread to me.


----------



## LittleDreamer

Chased said:


> Seems like a pointless thread to me.


Um no, not really. I think it’s a great way to keep oneself motivated by logging everything you’re doing related to health and fitness, which is what this sub-forum is about. People motivate themselves in different ways so this might not be something that would help you, but that doesn’t mean it’s not helping him.
It’s much better to encourage someone working on their overall health and cheer them on as opposed to trying to bring them down.

******

So, to Lakigigar, I admire that you’re doing all this and being so thorough and detailed by adding charts and graphs


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 26/12/2017*
Slept from 8.30am to 4pm (-> 7.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the "morning": 59.4 kg (-1.3 kg) or 131 lbs (-2.8 lbs) / BMI= 17.3 (-0.4) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
two glasses of fruit juice (140 kcal)
water
spaghetti with spinach (600 kcal)
TOTAL: +-750 kcal

That drop... was pretty dramatic. Totally didn't expect that, because i already did lost weight before. I did lose like 4.6 lbs on three days while i did ate an entire oven dish of macaroni, cheese and ham in the meantime. I did drop 0.7 bmi points in three days. That's amazing. I think some part of the weight drop could be related to stress, but in some way, i must have a body that is capable of losing a lot of weight on short time, or not being able to become fat? Like i did gain some weight at the end of last week quite quickly (on 18 december, i did weigh 132.5 pounds, on 22 december i did weigh 135.6 lbs and on 26 december, i did weigh 131 pounds).










Most people gain weight when they celebrate christmas and i lose a lot of weight. I knew I didn't eat enough during the last few days, but this drop is pretty ridicilous, and I also noticed that my t-shirts were suddenly too large to wear. I need smaller t-shirts. The difference is like crazy (but maybe that t-shirt was already too large?). The pants i did wear is fine, i didn't nead a belt, though i've noticed before that on other pants i had since i was a teenager, i need a belt (but i think on some pants, i always needed a belt for that, but i'm not sure). I think i lost some fat on my hips before. I've the feeling that i lost fat too on my calfs too. It's all muscle now, and they look amazing. My thigs still look pretty large and also muscled.

I've some ideas for the next days to eat/cook. I'm not entirely sure what to do, but we will see. I've thinked about mashed potatoes, red cabbage and (maybe) a chicken sausage tomorrow. I've also thought about chicken with rice & curry. I also want meatballs in tomato sauce, but this all sounds too much like meat, meat and meat. I've thought about a pizza too, but I lack a bit of inspiration. I also want salmon & broccoli with some pasta. I probably need to go to the grocery shop tomorrow (or today, if i'm still awake next morning -> then i would go to the grocery shop, and after that just sleep because it would just be easier.) I also need to pay my bills, i can do that next morning too, than i don't have to worry about it anymore when i wake up in the evening.


----------



## Chased

LittleDrummer said:


> Um no, not really. I think it’s a great way to keep oneself motivated by logging everything you’re doing related to health and fitness, which is what this sub-forum is about. People motivate themselves in different ways so this might not be something that would help you, but that doesn’t mean it’s not helping him.
> It’s much better to encourage someone working on their overall health and cheer them on as opposed to trying to bring them down.
> 
> ******
> 
> So, to Lakigigar, I admire that you’re doing all this and being so thorough and detailed by adding charts and graphs


You are so in love dude.


----------



## Yami no Yume

@Lakigistar

As somebody who has serious problems gaining weight myself I can tell you that you definitely eat too little. I mean you eat on many days just the food of one meal or even nothing. I can lose weight when I have two or even three meals per day! Also adding some yoghurt and cookies doesn't help I think. You need one or two real meals extra per day. Else would just be a waste of time. Sorry, maybe I overread it but why do you eat so little?
I also noticed most of the nights you sleep for very long periods. I read too much sleep can cause depression just like too less sleep can. Be aware of it.


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## Lakigigar

Yuki no Yume said:


> @Lakigistar
> 
> As somebody who has serious problems gaining weight myself I can tell you that you definitely eat too little. I mean you eat on many days just the food of one meal or even nothing. I can lose weight when I have two or even three meals per day! Also adding some yoghurt and cookies doesn't help I think. You need one or two real meals extra per day. Else would just be a waste of time. Sorry, maybe I overread it but why do you eat so little?
> I also noticed most of the nights you sleep for very long periods. I read too much sleep can cause depression just like too less sleep can. Be aware of it.


What was first: the chicken or the egg, but in this case the depression or the long sleep times. Like i've said, i never feel awake when i get awakened by my alarm clock. Also, i usually wake up after i get awake, even if that's after 10 hours.

I don't know about the food. It doesn't help that i stopped drinking coke. It doesn't help i don't eat meat a lot and don't replace it by something help. It doesn't help that i don't eat breakfast. It doesn't help that i usually don't eat either lunch or dinner or whatever the fuck i'm doing.

I usually eat once a day, yes. That's some habit of me. I never eat breakfast. At school, i've skipped lunch too quite often in certain times. I eat however a lot of cookies, but i may have reduced that too. I think i might be afraid of some foods or preparing new kinds of food. It just feels so hard to adapt a better lifestyle.


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## Yami no Yume

Lakigistar said:


> What was first: the chicken or the egg, but in this case the depression or the long sleep times. Like i've said, i never feel awake when i get awakened by my alarm clock. Also, i usually wake up after i get awake, even if that's after 10 hours.


It can be both. You might have had depression before but your long sleeps add to that even more feelings of depression. Actually, I feel very depressed, too, when I slept too long. Then I am also not motivated getting up and I stay in bed for some time. I would also do that when I woke up at time and I am too lazy. Then I would just do things on my phone or even laptop until I feel like getting up. I think it is a bad habit but I try to work on it. You should, too.
Find something that motivates you to get up. Set yourself something that you only allow yourself to do at the morning, for example. And when you don't get up that early you would not allow yourself to do it. It should be very important to you, so it really motivates you.
When I oversleep, I sometimes see the rising sun above the horizon. It reminds me of how the world keeps on moving while I am lying here, pitying myself, lazy, doing nothing. The world doesn't wait for me. I should make the world wanting me to wait for them! Of course, you don't see the sun that easy as in other seasons right now but maybe the idea helps you as it helps me. 
You should also regulate your sleep to make it fit to times of the day that make you get up naturally. If you go to bed just before sunrise it is absolutely normal that you won't wake up for half of the day. The movement of the earth but also the light and warmth of the sun have an enormous effect on our body! It would be much easier to go to bed just after the sky reached its darkest level and then you would have it easy to wake up before sunset, especially in this winter season but also during early spring and later fall. Right now the sky reached its darkest level in Middle Europe around 6 pm. You can prepare yourself to sleep around 8 pm and sleep when it's 9 or 10 pm. Then it would be easy to wake up at 6 am, so you would still sleep at least 8 hours or even more. I would prefer a little bit less actually but you have to work on it for a lot of days anyway until you got into that rhythm. By the way, where I live right now morning dawn begins just before 7 am and sunrise is right after half past 8 am. I can assure you that the time right before morning dawn is the most inspiring time of the day. Then comes morning dawn itself. There is all that inspiring energy in the air that gives you new ideas. The time after sunrise is the most motivating time and the time that gives us the most energy from the sun. This is the best time to work. Maybe this sounds like esoteric nonsense but it isn't. I mean I feel it before I even remember it. roud:
Of course, you can't just switch your daily rhythm but I advise to you to try it bit by bit. :happy:




> I don't know about the food. It doesn't help that i stopped drinking coke. It doesn't help i don't eat meat a lot and don't replace it by something help. It doesn't help that i don't eat breakfast. It doesn't help that i usually don't eat either lunch or dinner or whatever the fuck i'm doing.
> 
> I usually eat once a day, yes. That's some habit of me. I never eat breakfast. At school, i've skipped lunch too quite often in certain times. I eat however a lot of cookies, but i may have reduced that too. I think i might be afraid of some foods or preparing new kinds of food. It just feels so hard to adapt a better lifestyle.


Why do you leave out so many meals? For example, breakfast is what actually gives us the energy for the whole day. Well, sometimes I leave it out, too, but that's when I have no time.
I don't intend to talk eating cookies out of you. You can keep on doing that if you like it, no problem. You should just add one or two meals to your day even if you have to force yourself because right now you are starving yourself to death and that makes me worry 
I mean I heard the body can get used to receiving a little amount of food but it should be healthy and the way you are doing it is neither good for your physical health nor your mental health.


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 27/12/2017*
Slept from 10.45am to 17.30pm (-> 6.75 hours of sleep)
Weight in the "morning": 59.2 kg (-0.2 kg) or 130.5 lbs (-0.5 lbs) / BMI= 17.3 (=) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
chicken filet, rice and curry
4 yoghurts
TOTAL: +-900 kcal

I was surprised that chicken filet actually does have such a low amount of calories. I went to the grocery shop and did buy a lot of food however. Tomorrow, i'm going to make chicken filet, rice and curry again because i have another filet... (like why do i always have to buy two of them). I also bought chicken sausages for friday (a bit too early, but it will still be fresh), and i'm going to make them with beans in tomato sauce (or red cabbage) and mashed potatoes. I also bought a pizza and some spinach for next weekend. I will maybe eat meatballs in tomato sauce this weekend because i'm going to the grocery shop saturday again. I've bought some yoghurts, cookies and smoked salmon (i can't withstand that... ). Why do i eat so much meat ((.

On the bright side, i barely noticed it but i haven't drank coke anymore since 7/12 while I used to drink 3 litres of that on average every three days what was kinda ridicilous, but it wasn't even that hard to just abruptly stop with it. I've expected more trouble with it to be honest. I also eat less snacks now than i used to (possibly biggest reason of weight loss). Crisps for example are just ridicilous. I never want to eat them anymore. Even the cookies that i like, if i would eat them all at once, it's 1600 kcal (that's almost all calories of an entire day... ).

My rhythm is fucked up for years. See the first post of my sleep rhythm, it's like this for a year, and it could be a rare condition... . I have little to no influence on it. Today i forced myself to go to bed later than i want to (since i paid my bills, did some grocery shopping and even cooked my food for when i would wake up and did the dishes).

And now i'm going to watch a few movies, maybe some Friends and i have some things to do too this morning (like going to the bank).


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 27/12/2017*
Slept from 12am to 19.30pm (-> 7.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the "morning": 59.0 kg (-0.2 kg) or 130 lbs (-0.5 lbs) / BMI= 17.2 (-0.1) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
chicken filet, rice and curry
200 grams smoked salmon
5 yoghurts
TOTAL: +-1500 kcal

I've checked my heartbeat during the day, and my lowest heart rate after i woke up, was 44 beats per minutes. I think that's a bit low, lol. It's always been low, though. But with infp's everything goes a bit slower because we're lazy lol.


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 29/12/2017*
Slept from 1pm to 10pm (->9 hours of sleep)
Weight in the "morning": 59.5 kg (+0.5 kg) or 130 lbs (-0.5 lbs) / BMI= 17.4 (+0.2) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Did eat:
1) 2 chicken sausages, 100 grams of red cabbage and 200 or 300 grams of mashed potatoes
2) 10 waffles de liégois
3) 400 grams of cake
____________
TOTAL: +-5800 kcal :blushed: (that's so much!)

I'm not planning to eat tomorrow. I have plenty of food at home, and i really don't want to go the grocery shop. I have a pizza for old years eve. Not sure what i'm going to do than. I just feel miserable. (i want to die).


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## Electra

Lakigistar said:


> *Logs for 29/12/2017*
> Slept from 1pm to 10pm (->9 hours of sleep)
> Weight in the "morning": 59.5 kg (+0.5 kg) or 130 lbs (-0.5 lbs) / BMI= 17.4 (+0.2) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
> Did eat:
> 1) 2 chicken sausages, 100 grams of red cabbage and 200 or 300 grams of mashed potatoes
> 2) 10 waffles de liégois
> 3) 400 grams of cake
> ____________
> TOTAL: +-5800 kcal :blushed: (that's so much!)
> 
> I'm not planning to eat tomorrow. I have plenty of food at home, and i really don't want to go the grocery shop. I have a pizza for old years eve. Not sure what i'm going to do than. I just feel miserable. (i want to die).


:hug: why do you want to die?


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 30/12/2017 and 31/12/2017*
Slept from 4.30pm to 11.30pm (->7 hours of sleep)
Weight when i woke up: 61.3 kg (+1.8 kg) or 135.1 lbs (+5.1 lbs) / BMI= 17.9 (+0.5) / Height: 185 cm or 6'1
Weight in the morning 8 hours after I woke up: 60.6 kg (-0.7 kg) or 133.6 lbs (-1.5 lbs) / BMI= 17.7 (-0.2) (to have a statistic for this day)
Did eat:
Only water

I didn't plan to eat. I don't plan to eat until new year.


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 01/01/2018*
Slept from 5pm to 12pm (->7 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.1 kg (-0.5 kg) or 132.5 lbs (-1.1 lbs) / BMI= 17.5 (-0.2)
Did eat:
Pizza speciale ristorante (824 kcal)
water
TOTAL: 824 kcal


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 02/01/2018*
Slept from 6.30pm to 4am (->9.30 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 59.6 kg (-0.5 kg) or 131.4 lbs (-1.1 lbs) / BMI= 17.4 (-0.1)
Did eat:
8 frangipanes / cookies - 1824 kcal
a bit of cake - 666 kcal
6 yoghurts - 300 kcal
smoked salmon - 390 kcal
spaghetti spinach - 840 kcal (there was also smoked salmon in it)
water
TOTAL: 4012 kcal

Like what the fuck... The last day i've eaten a normal amount of food was 21/12... Because i did ate less than 1400 kcals, or i did eat more than 4000 kcal. I never ate anything between 1400 and 4000 kcal food in a period of ten days. I think if i was a girl, i would probably have purged all that food, and than i would be bulimic... .


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 03/01/2018*
Slept from 10pm to 5am (->7 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.6 kg (+1.0 kg) or 133.6 lbs (+2.2 lbs) / BMI= 17.7 (+0.3)
Did eat:
cake - 1110 kcal
yoghurt - 294 kcal
spaghetti spinach - 600 kcal
___________________
TOTAL: +-2000 kcal


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 04/01/2018*
Slept from 8pm to 6am (->10 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.2 kg (-0.4 kg) or 132.7 lbs (-0.9 lbs) / BMI= 17.6 (-0.1)
Did eat:
A sandwich with cheese & ham
French fries with two snacks
___________________
TOTAL: +-2500 kcal

*Logs for 05/01/2018*
Slept from 11pm to 6am (->7 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.5 kg (+0.3 kg) or 133.4 lbs (+0.7 lbs) / BMI= 17.7 (+0.1)
Did eat:
smoked salmon
10 waffles (liegois)
6 yoghurts
___________________
TOTAL: +-3500 kcal


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 06/01/2018*
Slept from 10.30pm to 7am (->8.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.6 kg (+0.1 kg) or 133.6 lbs (+0.2 lbs) / BMI= 17.7 (=)
Did eat:
pizza bolognese
5 yoghurts
7 cookies
___________________
TOTAL: +-3000 kcal

I now really feel sick. ...


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 07/01/2018*
Slept from 11pm to 7.30am (->8.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.6 kg (+0.0 kg) or 133.6 lbs (+0.0 lbs) / BMI= 17.7 (=)
Did eat:
spaghetti spinach - 600 kcal
1 yoghurt - 50 kcal
___________________
TOTAL: +-650 kcal

I feel a lot better right now, i'm surprised that i didn't gain weight over the last days.


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 08/01/2017*
Slept from 11pm to 8.30am (->9.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.5 kg (-0.1 kg) or 133.6 lbs (+0.0 lbs) / BMI= 17.7 (=)
Did eat:
5 bars of snicker
chicken burger
1 beer
5 waffles liègois
TOTAL: 3100 kcal

*Logs for 09/01/2017*
Slept from 1am to 8am (->7 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 61.4 kg (+0.9 kg) or 133.6 lbs (+0.0 lbs) / BMI= 17.9 (+0.2)
Did eat:
tagliatelle, broccoli with cream and salmon 
2 bars of snickers
1 frangipagne
8 cookies (_confituurtjes_)
TOTAL: 2400 kcal

Training session: "took a walk of half an hour" -> burned 244 kcals

*Logs for 10/01/2017*
Slept from 1am to 10am (->9 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 61.1 kg (+-0.3 kg) or 133.6 lbs (+0.0 lbs) / BMI= 17.8 (-0.1)
Did eat:
- meatballs in tomato sauce
- oasis tropical
TOTAL: 1800 kcal

Training session: "took a walk of 45 minutes -> burned 406 kcals
Training session: hard running for 15 minutes -> burned 232 kcals (see in detail)


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 11/01/2018*
Slept from 1.30am to 10.30am (->9 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.9 kg (-0.2 kg) or 134.3 lbs (-0.4 lbs) / BMI= 17.8 (=)
Did eat:
- salmon, broccoli with cream & tagliatelle
- 1 frangipane
- 1 beer
- 5 waffles
- 1l op oasis tropical juice
TOTAL: 3500 kcal

*Logs for 12/01/2018*
Slept from 2.45am to 11.30am (->8.75 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.4 kg (-0.5 kg) or 133.2 lbs (-1.1 lbs) / BMI= 17.6 (-0.2)
Did eat:
- spaghetti carbonara
TOTAL: 1400 kcal

Did exercise:
- walking (30 mins) - burned 250 kcals
- running (10,7kph for 42 mins) - burned 540 kcals
burned 790 kcals in total


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 13/01/2018*
Slept from 3am to 11am (->8 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.2 kg (-0.2 kg) or 132.7 lbs (-0.5 lbs) / BMI= 17.6 (-0.2)
Did eat:
- pizza ristorante prosciutto
- 3 frangipanes (cookies)
- 800ml of fruit juice
TOTAL: 2000 kcal

Maintenance today, tomorrow, i'm going to run again probably since i've recovered enough, and the sun will shine a bit for the first time in maybe one and a half months, and i'm going to eat some pasta with spinach.

Some graphs:


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 14/01/2018*
Slept from 4.30am to 11.30am (->7 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60.1 kg (-0.1 kg) or 132.5 lbs (-0.2 lbs) / BMI= 17.5 (-0.1)
Did eat:
- spaghetti spinach with a bit of cheese on top
- 600 ml of fruit juice
TOTAL: 1000 kcal

Did exercise:
- walked 20 minutes (burned 150 kcals)
- ran 15 minutes at a pace of 10 km/u (burned 150 kcals)

NET CALORIES INTAKE: 700 kcal


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 15/01/2018*
Slept from 5am to 1pm (->7 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 59.5 kg (-0.6 kg) or 131.2 lbs (-1.3 lbs) / BMI= 17.4 (-0.1)
Did eat:
- 100 grams spaghetti spinach with a bit of cheese on top (yes again, though less than yesterday)
- 200 grams of white beans in tomato sauce
- 0.3l of beer (but have to drink it yet)

TOTAL: +-800 kcal

This is the sixth day in a row that I lost weight. I lost 1.9 kg / 4.2 lbs in 6 days and dropped 0.5 bmi points. But i had a lower weight between 26-12 and 29-12 than the weight i have now. Though i'm not far off the lowest weight since i've started tracking it (and possibly a long time ago, since i used to weigh a bit higher, not a lot, but i've always been 62-63-64 kg normally, what is still considered underweight, lol.

I'm a bit surprised that i didn't gain a lot of weight last week, because i actually did eat a lot of times, especially the 11/01 i've eaten 3500 kilocalories (!!!), and to my own surprise, i continued losing weight (even more than 1 pound). There was not even a small rebound in the days following after that event. It doesn't make sense. It could be related to running, but I didn't run on thursday, i did run wednesday, friday and sunday.



















I lost more than 4 pounds or 2 kg with this, when I already was underweight.


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## Lakigigar

Not much has changed.


*Logs for 16/01/2018*
Slept from 2.30am to 10.30am (->8 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 59.6 kg (+0.1 kg) or 131.4 lbs (+0.2 lbs) / BMI= 17.4 (=)
Did eat:
bread with _speculoos_ pasta
TOTAL: +-2600 kcal


*Logs for 17/01/2018*
Slept from 5am to 12am (->7 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 59.7 kg (+0.1 kg) or 131.6 lbs (+0.2 lbs) / BMI= 17.4 (=)
Did eat:
- bread with _speculoos_ pasta (leftovers), 6 slices of bread
- french fries with two snacks
- a beer

TOTAL: +-2600 kcal


*Logs for 18/01/2018*
Slept from 5am to 12.30am (->7.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60 kg (+0.3 kg) or 132.3 lbs (+0.6 lbs) / BMI= 17.5 (+0.1)
Did eat:
- spaghetti carbonara (with bacon and eggs and cheese)
- a beer

TOTAL: +-1500 kcal

*Logs for 19/01/2018*
Slept from 5.30am to 11.30am (->6 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 59.7 kg (-0.3 kg) or 131.6 lbs (-0.6 lbs) / BMI= 17.4 (-0.1)
Did eat:
- spaghetti with spinach
- cake (an entire cake)
- 5 waffles
- beer

TOTAL: +-4500 kcal

*Logs for 20/01/2018*
Slept from 6am to 11am (->5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 60 kg (+0.3 kg) or 132.3 lbs (+0.6 lbs) / BMI= 17.5 (+0.1)
Did eat:
- 5 waffles
- spaghetti with spinach

TOTAL: +-2200 kcal

Lol, it surprises me how i have trouble gaining weight, like i've eaten so much, and i only gained 0.3 kg (like wtf...).


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## Lakigigar

*Logs for 21/01/2018*
Slept from 3am to 2pm (->11 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 59.8 kg (-0.2 kg) or 131.8 lbs (-0.5 lbs) / BMI= 17.5 (=)
Did eat:
- broccoli, tagliatelle, cream (tiny bit of milk added) and ham
- a beer
TOTAL: +-1200 kcal

*Logs for 22/01/2018*
Slept from 5.30am to 1pm (->7.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 59.3 kg (-0.5 kg) or 130.7 lbs (-1.1 lbs) / BMI= 17.3 (-0.2)
Did eat:
- broccoli, tagliatelle, cream (tiny bit of milk added) and ham (leftovers)
- a beer
TOTAL: +-1000 kcal

Also, i didn't drink coke for 1.5 months, and fun thing of all, i almost forgot about it. I even didn't had to think about it. I thought it would have been WAY TOUGHER to get rid of my coke addiction, but it's actually pretty easy to do that. That made me feel good. I've more trouble with eating snacks, binging or still eating meat. That will be a tough job. I don't have trouble not drinking coke anymore. It's fake food and unhealthy, and you can replace it by just water.

Also, i lost like 3 kg or 7 pounds since i kept track of all of it. I just can't gain weight, despite having the feeling that i eat enough. I need to eat like 3000 calories. There might be something wrong with my digestive process, but okay.


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## clem

Your calories fluctuate alot. Is that part of your plan?


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## Lakigigar

clem said:


> Your calories fluctuate alot. Is that part of your plan?


I don't know. I just don't have it under control. It's of course not part of the plan, but i think i just lack discipline.

*Logs for 23/01/2018*
Slept from 5.30am to 12am (->6.5 hours of sleep)
Weight in the morning: 58.7 kg (-0.6 kg) or 129.4 lbs (-1.3 lbs) / BMI= 17.1 (-0.2)
Did eat:
- a sandwich with ham, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes and cocktail
- rice, curry and chicken
- 8 pancakes
- 1 frangipane
- 1.75 l of tropical juice

TOTAL: +-3800 kcal

The problem is that i'm always hungry. It's very annoying. I even ate 3800 calories, and i'm still so hungry. LOL.










This is my calories intake during the last 45 days... yeah. It kinda fluctuates... lol. I can't understand how i did lose like 4 kg or 8-9 pounds in that period of time.

I'm also at my lowest weight ever right now (or at least that i'm aware off), since i'm an adult.


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## clem

I wonder if it’s better to have consistent calories or if only the average matters. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Lakigigar

*Weight Evolution*
24/01: 60.2 kg / 132.7 lbs / BMI: 17.6
25/01: 60.2 kg / 132.7 lbs / BMI: 17.6
26/01: 59.7 kg / 131.6 lbs / BMI: 17.4
27/01: 59.6 kg / 131.4 lbs / BMI: 17.4
28/01: 60.0 kg / 132.3 lbs / BMI: 17.5
29/01: 59.5 kg / 131.2 lbs / BMI: 17.4
30/01: 59.1 kg / 130.3 lbs / BMI: 17.3
31/01: 60.2 kg / 132.7 lbs / BMI: 17.6
01/02: 60.4 kg / 133.2 lbs / BMI: 17.6
02/02: 60.1 kg / 132.5 lbs / BMI: 17.6
03/02: 59.7 kg / 131.6 lbs / BMI: 17.4


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## Lakigigar

*04/02/2018*
Weight in the morning: 59.0 kg (-0.7 kg) or 130.0 lbs (-1.6 lbs) / BMI= 17.2 (-0.2)

*Approximate amount of Calories intake everyday*

24/01: 2100 kcal
25/01: 1900 kcal
26/01: 2000 kcal
27/01: 2200 kcal
28/01: 1800 kcal
29/01: 900 kcal
30/01: 3700 kcal
31/01: 2500 kcal
01/02: 1500 kcal
02/02: 2600 kcal
03/02: 1400 kcal
04/02: 700 kcal


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## Lakigigar

I will keep track of my weight again... not of my food and sleep cycles anymore... (except if i have something interesting to tell that's relevant...). I might also consider starting running again. I've walked 20 to 25 km this weekend, what is worth noting. Today i just ate a big plate of spaghetti bolognese. Friday evening and saturday evening, i ate a lot of french fries with snacks at a friend's home.

5/07: 63.5 kg (BMI 18.5) 
6/07: 62.8 kg (BMI 18.3)
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg (BMI 18.4)

One of the reasons why i could have relatively (but not dangerously) low weight, is of course that i just usually eat once or twice on a day, while normal people eat three times a day. I don't eat a lot of snacks as well in the sense that i don't vary as much, but when i do, i usually eat them in a controlled bingey way (like if i have 8 cookies at home of each 200 kcal, i will usually eat all of them in 10 minutes). Because of that, i usually don't have a lot of food stored at home, because i would literally eat all of it that i can immediately eat immediately. Buying cookies is in some way a "controlled binge". My eating behavior is also very unusual. I also never eat potatoes or bread for example haha. I eat vegetables though... I'm not sure if eat them enough, but i eat a lot of broccoli, spinach and mushrooms now, and of course my bolognese sauce has vegetables (tomatoes, carrots) as well. I might make more salads though...

Lowest weight: 58.7 kg (BMI 17.1)
Highest weight: 63.5 kg (BMI 18.5)

I might lose some weight again... because it seems like i will experience high amounts of stress in the upcoming two weeks, and my eating behavior has frustrated me a lot, so i might try to change that, but if i do that, i will inevitably quickly lose weight. I've gained weight recently because i stopped keeping track for a while... and that might have helped a bit. Though i definitely don't want to gain more weight (or maybe i do...? but than i have to prepare for fitness exercices).


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## Lakigigar

I've calculated that 125 lbs would be the ideal weight for a person like me!!! Not too thin, and not too fat... I've weighed: 62.6 kg this morning, or 138 lbs, so that means i have to lose 13 lbs or 5.9 kg, because i want to weigh 56.7 kg. That means, i still have a lot of work to do!!!

I'm not sure in how many time it's realistic to lose this, but i think i should be able to do this... at the beginning of the autumn: 21/9. My BMI would be 16.6 than.

5/07: 63.5 kg (BMI 18.5) 
6/07: 62.8 kg (BMI 18.3)
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg (BMI 18.4)
9/07: 62.6 kg (BMI 18.3)


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## Lakigigar

5/07: 63.5 kg / 140.0 lbs / BMI: 18.5
6/07: 62.8 kg / 138.5 lbs / BMI: 18.3
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
9/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
10/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4

I gained weight!!! :crying: I hate that... I want to lose weight .


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## Lakigigar

5/07: 63.5 kg / 140.0 lbs / BMI: 18.5
6/07: 62.8 kg / 138.5 lbs / BMI: 18.3
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
9/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
10/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
11/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4

I also ran today for the first time in six months, though sometimes i make long walks like infp's like to do!!! My running session was fun. I ran 5.7 km at an average of 10 km/hr.










I've measured my heartbeat as well...

Immediately after running session: 151 bpm
10 minutes after running session (but still walking): 106 bpm
20 minutes after running session (just after coming home): 85 bpm
30 minutes after running session: 80 bpm
1 hour after running session: 70 bpm


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## Lakigigar

5/07: 63.5 kg / 140.0 lbs / BMI: 18.5
6/07: 62.8 kg / 138.5 lbs / BMI: 18.3
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
9/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
10/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
11/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
12/07: 62.3 kg / 137.3 lbs / BMI: 18.2


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## Lakigigar

I ran again today!!! 










9 km/u for 5.7 km. A bit slower... Maybe i wasn't completely recovered, but it was a bit tougher than two days ago.

5/07: 63.5 kg / 140.0 lbs / BMI: 18.5
6/07: 62.8 kg / 138.5 lbs / BMI: 18.3
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
9/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
10/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
11/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
12/07: 62.3 kg / 137.3 lbs / BMI: 18.2
13/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3


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## The red spirit

Lakigigar said:


> I gained weight!!! :crying: I hate that... I want to lose weight


Not sure what is your height, but your weight already looks bulimic. Not sure what you are trying to achieve, but looking like skeleton is nasty. Also if you don't have enough body fat, it's very unhealthy.


----------



## Lakigigar

The red spirit said:


> Not sure what is your height, but your weight already looks bulimic. Not sure what you are trying to achieve, but looking like skeleton is nasty. Also if you don't have enough body fat, it's very unhealthy.


My height is 6'1". I want a BMI of 16.5. I think that would be ideal... I also want a body perfect for long-distance runner and become better in long-distance running... I don't think you know what bulimic is... I'm also not really underweight... And being slightly underweight isn't bad... An anorexic weight is a BMI below 15. I don't have that.


----------



## The red spirit

Lakigigar said:


> My height is 6'1"


You should always use meters and centimeters. I can't process this shit without conversion. PerC only has like 18% of Americans, rest use SI system units.




Lakigigar said:


> I want a BMI of 16.5.


Honestly it sounds horrible. Really. There are many ways to kill yourself for example, but you choose the road to never be happy. You already say that you are unhappy. Delicious food can alleviate mood a lot, it contains, sometimes, a big psychological effect. Even if you ignore it, it's unconscious. People love food. Not having good enough mass is analogous to cutting metal from car to reduce weight. You know you shouldn't do that and that it affect rigidity, safety of frame, but you do it anyway to shave miliseconds of lap times. You aren't a car, you can't be changed. I believe that your goal to be skeleton with BMI of 16.5 wouldn't be appreciated by anyone and later you will understand limited value of such thing. 

I personally never cared for my mass. I ate what I wanted and I have zero problems with mass. My body tells me when and what to eat. It pretty much never fails.





Lakigigar said:


> I think that would be ideal... I also want a body perfect for long-distance runner and become better in long-distance running... I don't think you know what bulimic is... I'm also not really underweight... And being slightly underweight isn't bad...


Being off the limits of normal weight is always bad. Sorry it's true. Whether obese or too skinny is just bad. I'm not gonna be doctor here and won't explain precisely why, but it's not good for anything. I remember one very scary reason why people shouldn't have too low body fat, they are far more prone to having internal injuries. Doesn't sound attractive. 




Lakigigar said:


> An anorexic weight is a BMI below 15. I don't have that.


Anorexia is severe both medical and psychological disorder and you already want to go to 16.5. 18 is on the low end for normal people. You won't magically become better runner if you will be extremely lightweight. If you want to be a runner, train endurance instead of trying to shave your body. You need muscles that can produce power for long time, therefore they need to make energy for long durations. To make your body learn to do it, you should run often, maybe do some cardio or HIIT. Also it's better to have more power in your legs as the more you run, the less strength they will have after some time, so reserves are totally fine. In any case your body mass index should be then closer to 18-20 then. That's far away from lethargic 16.5.


----------



## Lakigigar

The red spirit said:


> You should always use meters and centimeters. I can't process this shit without conversion. PerC only has like 18% of Americans, rest use SI system units.
> 
> 
> 
> Honestly it sounds horrible. Really. There are many ways to kill yourself for example, but you choose the road to never be happy. You already say that you are unhappy. Delicious food can alleviate mood a lot, it contains, sometimes, a big psychological effect. Even if you ignore it, it's unconscious. People love food. Not having good enough mass is analogous to cutting metal from car to reduce weight. You know you shouldn't do that and that it affect rigidity, safety of frame, but you do it anyway to shave miliseconds of lap times. You aren't a car, you can't be changed. I believe that your goal to be skeleton with BMI of 16.5 wouldn't be appreciated by anyone and later you will understand limited value of such thing.
> 
> I personally never cared for my mass. I ate what I wanted and I have zero problems with mass. My body tells me when and what to eat. It pretty much never fails.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Being off the limits of normal weight is always bad. Sorry it's true. Whether obese or too skinny is just bad. I'm not gonna be doctor here and won't explain precisely why, but it's not good for anything. I remember one very scary reason why people shouldn't have too low body fat, they are far more prone to having internal injuries. Doesn't sound attractive.
> 
> 
> 
> Anorexia is severe both medical and psychological disorder and you already want to go to 16.5. 18 is on the low end for normal people. You won't magically become better runner if you will be extremely lightweight. If you want to be a runner, train endurance instead of trying to shave your body. You need muscles that can produce power for long time, therefore they need to make energy for long durations. To make your body learn to do it, you should run often, maybe do some cardio or HIIT. Also it's better to have more power in your legs as the more you run, the less strength they will have after some time, so reserves are totally fine. In any case your body mass index should be then closer to 18-20 then. That's far away from lethargic 16.5.


185 cm, but i'm still fine... though... I've had a BMI of 17.1 this winter... and i'm missing those times... For some reason i gained... and i feel terrible because of it, and i now want to get back to at least where i was in the winter and a tiny bit below it... because i had a great body, and also was able to run well..

Long-distance running is still possible with low BMI... Alan Culpepper has a BMI of 17,2 and he was pretty good. I do care for mass, because i'm afraid of being overweight, especially if i continue to eat like this.... I binge and overeat way too much, and than i get abdominal pains and cramps, and feel sick..., all because i eat way too much and it's gross.


----------



## The red spirit

Lakigigar said:


> 185 cm, but i'm still fine... though... I've had a BMI of 17.1 this winter... and i'm missing those times... For some reason i gained... and i feel terrible because of it, and i now want to get back to at least where i was in the winter and a tiny bit below it... because i had a great body, and also was able to run well..


I think problem is more related to your body's well-being rather than weight.




Lakigigar said:


> Long-distance running is still possible with low BMI... Alan Culpepper has a BMI of 17,2 and he was pretty good.


So what? We can almost always find individual cases of someone disproving what is known as good, that doesn't mean that belief is wrong. And also it's only one case, so it's extremely small scope of looking at such things. You must look wider than that.




Lakigigar said:


> I do care for mass, because i'm afraid of being overweight, especially if i continue to eat like this.... I binge and overeat way too much, and than i get abdominal pains and cramps, and feel sick..., all because i eat way too much and it's gross.


That's gross because you fail to see what is good and what is bad, to put it simply. You are far from overweight, that's some sick belief too. You should only learn to how to control your food eating habits instead of "losing weight" bullshit. Mostly learn about healthy food and unhealthy food. Otherwise it's probably hard to see yourself from the side, but you are overthinking such thing way too much, that's unhealthy state of mind.


----------



## Lakigigar

The red spirit said:


> I think problem is more related to your body's well-being rather than weight.
> 
> 
> 
> So what? We can almost always find individual cases of someone disproving what is known as good, that doesn't mean that belief is wrong. And also it's only one case, so it's extremely small scope of looking at such things. You must look wider than that.
> 
> 
> 
> That's gross because you fail to see what is good and what is bad, to put it simply. You are far from overweight, that's some sick belief too. You should only learn to how to control your food eating habits instead of "losing weight" bullshit. Mostly learn about healthy food and unhealthy food. Otherwise it's probably hard to see yourself from the side, but you are overthinking such thing way too much, that's unhealthy state of mind.


athlete height (cm) mass (kg) distance BMI
alan culpepper 185.4 59.0 42000 17.2 
yvonne murray 170.2 50.3 3000 17.4 
greta waitz 168.9 49.9 42000 17.5 
sebastian coe 175.3 54.0 800 17.6 
sileshi sihine 165.0 48.0 10000 17.6 
gebremariam 178.0 56.0 10000 17.7 
dathan ritzenhein 172.7 53.1 10000 17.8 
deena kastor 162.6 47.2 10000 17.9 
sara slattery 170.2 52.2 5000 18.0 
paula radcliffe 173.0 54.0 42000 18.0 
abdi abdirahman 180.3 59.0 10000 18.1 
Elvan Abeylegesse 159 40 10000 15.8 (data from iaaf)
Mizuki Noguchi 150 40 42000 17.8 (some references put her weight at 39kg)
Kim Smith 166 49 10000 17.8 (data from athletics new zealand)
Tirunesh Dibaba 155 44 10000 18.3 (data from iaaf)


----------



## Lakigigar

5/07: 63.5 kg / 140.0 lbs / BMI: 18.5
6/07: 62.8 kg / 138.5 lbs / BMI: 18.3
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
9/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
10/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
11/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
12/07: 62.3 kg / 137.3 lbs / BMI: 18.2
13/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
14/07: 62.0 kg / 136.7 lbs / BMI: 18.1

I've measured my heartrate and blood pressure as well

Lowest heartrate: 43 (Usually +-50)
Lowest blood pressure: 98/62


----------



## The red spirit

Lakigigar said:


> athlete height (cm) mass (kg) distance BMI
> alan culpepper 185.4 59.0 42000 17.2
> yvonne murray 170.2 50.3 3000 17.4
> greta waitz 168.9 49.9 42000 17.5
> sebastian coe 175.3 54.0 800 17.6
> sileshi sihine 165.0 48.0 10000 17.6
> gebremariam 178.0 56.0 10000 17.7
> dathan ritzenhein 172.7 53.1 10000 17.8
> deena kastor 162.6 47.2 10000 17.9
> sara slattery 170.2 52.2 5000 18.0
> paula radcliffe 173.0 54.0 42000 18.0
> abdi abdirahman 180.3 59.0 10000 18.1
> Elvan Abeylegesse 159 40 10000 15.8 (data from iaaf)
> Mizuki Noguchi 150 40 42000 17.8 (some references put her weight at 39kg)
> Kim Smith 166 49 10000 17.8 (data from athletics new zealand)
> Tirunesh Dibaba 155 44 10000 18.3 (data from iaaf)


That's still small scope, considering that there are much more of them at least in Olympics. Still even if you try to manipulate my mind into seeing low BMI as good thing, which isn't, then you totally failed with your overidealization of 16.5. In this too short list we see that around 18-17.5 is the most common. If those runners are worldwide level athletes, then you should know that they shave their body hair, have specialized diets and in other ways don't do many daily things as you probably do. They are all out to be faster than another. They don't care if their joints gonna be like 80 year old elder at age of 30, as long as they can run faster. 

BTW my own height is very similar. I weight around 72 kilos most of the time. Still I was fastest short distance runner in my school, sometimes in endurance too. But in endurance running one kid, who regularly goes to basketball beats me much more often than I beat him. His body is adapted to physical loads much better than mine and he can sustain it for longer. His weight is likely +5 kilos of what I weight. He also has visible ABS and muscles. This is realistic look of what you are looking at. Weight is pretty much meaningless, as long as you don't have excessive fat (obeseness).

I don't really get that obsession with weight besides your case. People seem to look at it as it is evil and magically makes you unhealthy. Too bad it's complete nonsense if we look at it from biology's perspective. It' better to be slightly overweight rather than slightly too skinny in terms of well-being and overall health. This overthinking about meaningless things like weight and calories is true sign of sick mind, which has problems somewhere else, instead of body. Important stuff are other things like carbs, fats (types of them too), protein, vitamins, minerals. Calories are only needed in cases, when you use lies to stop horribly obese people from overeating or when there are special medical needs, in later case it's not you who should know how much calories you need, but only doctor. Most of the time this fitting into some calorie limits is complete bullshit and ruining (not exactly, but at least short term mood, which is influenced by lack of some stuff found in food) your health for zero benefits. So it makes zero sense.

BTW one example of unhealthy eating is eating sugar. Like 100 grams per day. It's less harmful than not getting enough food as sugar can be converted into other product (fat I think). When you don't have food at all you must get energy from somewhere else and then it's either burning fat that you have (which you don't have much at all) or burning your organs like muscles, liver, brains and etc. Of course 100 gram intake of sugar is very unrealistic, so it doesn't happen daily. Similar thing is pizza. You can eat it like once a weak and it's no big deal. But starving once per week can burn fat or your organs. Probably that's why being slightly obese is better than being too skinny. 

Anyway, I have heard that minerals or vitamins can affect mood and your own not only physical state, but mental state a lot. I'm not sure what exactly does that, but you could learn that yourself. This might be something for you. Meanwhile I can buy bag of candies and just be happy without this overthinking.

Conclusion: you want to achieve some unrealistic bullshit, which will not bring any benefits and could potentially harm you instead.

Conclusion 2: Weight is very rough measure, which more often doesn't say much about you.

If you are totally into bullshit and taking risks then I will say that body to fat ratio exists and you probably want to google what it is. Too bad it's hard to measure it properly yourself. Only know close estimation of what it may be.


----------



## Lakigigar

Cals intake last days (estimation, more likely to have overestimated).

*Monday: 1778 kcal net intake*
Salmon, broccoli with cream & tagliatelle: 1500 kcal
3 beers - 420 kcal

*Tuesday: 4278 kcal net intake*
Chicken, curry sauce & rice - 700 kcal
8 frangipanes - 2350 kcal
2 litres of Oasis tropical - 760 kcal
3 beers - 420 kcal

*Wednesday: 792 kcal net intake*
1 frangipane - 300 kcals
6 glasses of fruit juice - 500 kcal
4 beers - 420 kcal
*running - 430 kcal burned*

*Thursday: 2148 kcal net intake*
belgian fries, bitterballs, viandel - 1500 kcal
one glass of fruit juice - 70 kcal
4 beers - 570 kcal

*Friday: 180 kcal net intake*
200 grams of smoked salmon - 390 kcal
2 beers - 300 kcal
*running - 430 kcal burned*

*Saturday: 769 kcal net intake*
500 grams of broccoli - 145 kcal
vinaigrette - 50 kcal
1 beer - 150 kcal
100 gram spaghetti - 165 kcal
cheese topping - 100 kcal
spinach with cream - 100 kcal

-> They're estimations, i can be wrong, especially since i'm doing a post-analysis for everything before friday. I however want to overestimate instead of underestimating cal intakes. I also did additional walks on those days, but haven't calculated that at the end (on the days i ran, i walked 20 to 30 minutes probably). I probably burned an additional 80 to 100 kcals on wednesday and friday. This would mean i've had a net intake friday of only 100 kcals at max.

-> My running exercises are usually done before i eat something. This is because i have been known to have abdominal and chest aches, when i do eat, even in advance. Possibly this could have affected my energy levels for running, and decreased my performances, but i still managed to run 5 km on both days... I felt a bit weaker on friday... but i still managed to do what i wanted to do. On monday, i will try something different though, and eat immediately, let everything drop and than run, and hopefully this will turn out to be better.

I felt very weak this morning however, dizzy and blurred vision, possibly related to not eating enough (not sure). Was also really tired. The fact that it did improve when i ate something maybe does indicate i indeed didn't eat enough, but okay i have to go through is, and maybe my blood pressure drops when i don't eat (i have orthostatic hypotension, and have suffered a long time from it). I've measured my blood pressure (my cellphone). The lowest it got was 96/62 but i don't know how accurate this is, and it's still normal. It's probably not reliable.

I'm really disappointed with my current weight... I had hoped to lost more weight by now, but i might have underestimate the calories of some foods, and now it makes a bit more sense though... 

*Planning for next two weeks*

-> possibly trying more vegan recipes / comfort foods, trying them out, i will go to the grocery shop possibly on monday, otherwise on tuesday or wednesday... But i prefer monday, since i'm more likely to binge than, and i can high restrict).

-> trying out new minecraft update haha and be bored rather quickly lol, reading some books i have to read, playing some games, possibly start playing online poker for money again (because i love demolishing other people and winning though idc about money) and watch some movies i want to watch.

-> decreasing alcohol usage and especially other calorie drinks, possibly trying out diet coke or smoke again

Tomorrow, moderate restriction
Monday, i will probably high restrict, and have one big meal in the morning (spaghetti with bacon and eggs)
Tuesday: low restrict (less than 500 kcals)
Wednesday, same pattern as monday unless i fuck up monday somehow with spaghetti, bacon and eggs.
Thursday: low restriction probably (less than 500 kcals)
Friday: high restriction and running again, probably going to my mom (or to a friend who also doesn't eat enough, and very unhealthily).
Saturday: high restriction (at mom's or a friend's)
Sunday: high restriction (possibly get back home, possibly not)
Monday: high restriction (if i'm not home yet, will have to be back home than, also running).
Tuesday: low restiction
Wednesday: high restriction (running)
Thursday: low restriction
Friday: high restriction (running)

High restriction: 1000 - 1500 kcals and at least staying below 2000 kcals. On some days that might be hard to pull off, esp. when i'm not home.
Low restriction: staying below 1000 at least, possibly more.

And oh yeah, i really want to taste cake... lol... Cravings haha. I had really intense cravings haha this afternoon... and i indeed realize again that something went wrong... I had the discipline and could withstand the cravings... broccoli is such good food haha. So low in calories, but so fullfilling, i love it!!! 

I ate fries last week, but this might be the last time i've eaten it until end of august at least... I'm also not going to drink non-alcoholic drinks that have calories in it (because i really don't want to waste calories on fucking unhealthy drinks that contain no nutrients lol).

This morning, i had also some sense of that i felt stronger than ever before (despite the weakness)... but... I actually went asleep after that... wake up, and than it was really bad, but i have now more than ever an i don't give a fuck-mentality... I really don't care anymore. I'm so done with all of this, and i feel stronger than ever before mentally (ironically). It's like losing weight (or starving myself, if you can call it like that, i actually don't) gives me more confidence, gives me control, fills emptiness and makes me more happy. But i really want to focus on my running trainings... I think changing tactics might able me to vastly improve my performances, and i expect a lot from myself... I want to quickly run 10 to 15 km, and improve speed to at least 12 km/h. It should be doable. From there on, i can make a next step. 

I know i can run for a very long time, and maybe i'm going to focus on that monday. I want to run at least 7 km, but i might possibly try a longer distance, if i feel i'm doing well... 15 km is not out of the question... I have already designed a 20 km (and more) route on a speed of 8 km/h. I want to participate in running competitions and next year i want to run my first marathon. I prefer a time below 4h.

It will be very hot and sunny (ugh) monday though, so if i run it will most likely be around 9pm. (probably 7km).


----------



## Lakigigar

The red spirit said:


> That's still small scope, considering that there are much more of them at least in Olympics. Still even if you try to manipulate my mind into seeing low BMI as good thing, which isn't, then you totally failed with your overidealization of 16.5. In this too short list we see that around 18-17.5 is the most common. If those runners are worldwide level athletes, then you should know that they shave their body hair, have specialized diets and in other ways don't do many daily things as you probably do. They are all out to be faster than another. They don't care if their joints gonna be like 80 year old elder at age of 30, as long as they can run faster.
> 
> BTW my own height is very similar. I weight around 72 kilos most of the time. Still I was fastest short distance runner in my school, sometimes in endurance too. But in endurance running one kid, who regularly goes to basketball beats me much more often than I beat him. His body is adapted to physical loads much better than mine and he can sustain it for longer. His weight is likely +5 kilos of what I weight. He also has visible ABS and muscles. This is realistic look of what you are looking at. Weight is pretty much meaningless, as long as you don't have excessive fat (obeseness).
> 
> I don't really get that obsession with weight besides your case. People seem to look at it as it is evil and magically makes you unhealthy. Too bad it's complete nonsense if we look at it from biology's perspective. It' better to be slightly overweight rather than slightly too skinny in terms of well-being and overall health. This overthinking about meaningless things like weight and calories is true sign of sick mind, which has problems somewhere else, instead of body. Important stuff are other things like carbs, fats (types of them too), protein, vitamins, minerals. Calories are only needed in cases, when you use lies to stop horribly obese people from overeating or when there are special medical needs, in later case it's not you who should know how much calories you need, but only doctor. Most of the time this fitting into some calorie limits is complete bullshit and ruining (not exactly, but at least short term mood, which is influenced by lack of some stuff found in food) your health for zero benefits. So it makes zero sense.
> 
> BTW one example of unhealthy eating is eating sugar. Like 100 grams per day. It's less harmful than not getting enough food as sugar can be converted into other product (fat I think). When you don't have food at all you must get energy from somewhere else and then it's either burning fat that you have (which you don't have much at all) or burning your organs like muscles, liver, brains and etc. Of course 100 gram intake of sugar is very unrealistic, so it doesn't happen daily. Similar thing is pizza. You can eat it like once a weak and it's no big deal. But starving once per week can burn fat or your organs. Probably that's why being slightly obese is better than being too skinny.
> 
> Anyway, I have heard that minerals or vitamins can affect mood and your own not only physical state, but mental state a lot. I'm not sure what exactly does that, but you could learn that yourself. This might be something for you. Meanwhile I can buy bag of candies and just be happy without this overthinking.
> 
> Conclusion: you want to achieve some unrealistic bullshit, which will not bring any benefits and could potentially harm you instead.
> 
> Conclusion 2: Weight is very rough measure, which more often doesn't say much about you.
> 
> If you are totally into bullshit and taking risks then I will say that body to fat ratio exists and you probably want to google what it is. Too bad it's hard to measure it properly yourself. Only know close estimation of what it may be.


I've always been one of the fastest runners of my class as well... I really like running. It's addicting to me. It also give meaning to your life, and fills the emptiness, esp. when you finish it. Low BMI can be healthy, but indeed, i might want to go to quickly to such a low BMI, but there are people who perfectly feel fine with a BMI of 16.5 and the last thing i'm going to be is a skeleton. I might beat that boy easily, and high weight for endurance sports is a no-go zone. Being overweight is just gross... Even BMI's of 22-23 and 24 are just gross, though i agree amount of fat and muscle mass matters, but i don't have the type of body to have high muscle mass, and i really don't want to have such a body


----------



## Lakigigar

5/07: 63.5 kg / 140.0 lbs / BMI: 18.5
6/07: 62.8 kg / 138.5 lbs / BMI: 18.3
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
9/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
10/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
11/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
12/07: 62.3 kg / 137.3 lbs / BMI: 18.2
13/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
14/07: 62.0 kg / 136.7 lbs / BMI: 18.1
15/07: 61.7 kg / 136.0 lbs / BMI: 18.0

Lol, did measure my blood pressure again... because i wanted to check it again (after i got dizzy yesterday because possibly of low blood pressure)... Well the app measured it, and i had bp of 91/59 which is pretty low i guess... but weirdly i've felt okay (opposed to yesterday)... But i don't think the app is accurate at all.

Lost some weight, but it goes pretty slow, i'm used to losing weight faster...


----------



## Logan X

Don't you have a diary?


----------



## The red spirit

Lakigigar said:


> I've always been one of the fastest runners of my class as well... I really like running. It's addicting to me. It also give meaning to your life, and fills the emptiness, esp. when you finish it.


I don't see it myself, but I see how someone could be like that. It's more common to see Se types into that. I personally would see little point in being faster than I already am, but yet again it's not my hobby or interest. As long as I can just beat them all and have a hope that I'm not hopeless at being fast, it's fine for me. On the contrast, no such thing as good enough exists in other hobbies I have.




Lakigigar said:


> Low BMI can be healthy, but indeed, i might want to go to quickly to such a low BMI, but there are people who perfectly feel fine with a BMI of 16.5 and the last thing i'm going to be is a skeleton. I might beat that boy easily, and high weight for endurance sports is a no-go zone. Being overweight is just gross...


You know it's offensive to people who have slight fat. I wouldn't say it, unless person is really seriously obese and barely can walk due to their problem. I feel that your judgment is a bit cruel. I personally believe that no matter what you try to achieve and no matter how superior you may be, there still should be some respect shown to lesser and less capable.




Lakigigar said:


> Even BMI's of 22-23 and 24 are just gross


Yet again I can't agree with that, especially when we know that BMI is hardly helpful measurement overall. It's like calories. Wanabe to pretend to know anything. Meaningless shit most of the time.




Lakigigar said:


> though i agree amount of fat and muscle mass matters, but i don't have the type of body to have high muscle mass, and i really don't want to have such a body


At least something sensible here


----------



## Lakigigar

The red spirit said:


> I don't see it myself, but I see how someone could be like that. It's more common to see Se types into that. I personally would see little point in being faster than I already am, but yet again it's not my hobby or interest. As long as I can just beat them all and have a hope that I'm not hopeless at being fast, it's fine for me. On the contrast, no such thing as good enough exists in other hobbies I have.
> 
> 
> 
> You know it's offensive to people who have slight fat. I wouldn't say it, unless person is really seriously obese and barely can walk due to their problem. I feel that your judgment is a bit cruel. I personally believe that no matter what you try to achieve and no matter how superior you may be, there still should be some respect shown to lesser and less capable.
> 
> 
> 
> Yet again I can't agree with that, especially when we know that BMI is hardly helpful measurement overall. It's like calories. Wanabe to pretend to know anything. Meaningless shit most of the time.
> 
> 
> 
> At least something sensible here


I don't tell people either (in personal) that they're overweight or obese, but honestly... it's one of the things that totally turn me off. I wished looks didn't matter for me, but i can't say that's the case. Sorry, better be honest here.

Also, girls expect a lot from us, guys... to the point where it exhausts me... so i might demand something from girls as well.



Logan X said:


> Don't you have a diary?


why???


----------



## Lakigigar

*15/07/2018*

*Slept from:* 3.15am to 9.45am (total of 6.5 hours)
*Weight in morning:* 61.7 kg (-0.3 kg) / 136.0 lbs (-0.7 lbs) / BMI: 18.0 (-0.1)
*Cal intake today:* 162 kcal

*What i've eaten:*

*3pm:*
Spinach with cream - 150 grams - 81 kcal

*8.30pm:*
Spinach with cream - 150 grams - 81 kcal

Not a lot did happen today. The problem i face is that i feel sometimes paralyzed in all my actions, because i almost think non-stop about food, and it's really exhausting. That's why i like distractions, like the world cup football final, or the end of a cobblestone stage in the Tour of France. But... even these sport events didn't satisfy me much, mostly because i was disappointed about the winner of the world cup football final, but okay. I've also watched The Visit later today, but i also didn't like it much. I haven't done much else today, but the day isn't over yet.

I'm a bit surprised i restricted that much, and that i only took 162 kcals in... I wanted to restrict a lot, but i had more room to eat something, but for some reason... i really didn't want to or felt an urge to eat anything more than this. It's like it would have been such a shame to even go slightly above the limit or to eat more than was absolutely necessary. Of course, i have my usual cravings, but i just think i didn't want to disappoint myself. I just couldn't eat something else anymore. Everything else felt like it had too many calories, and i was still a bit disappointed yesterday. I also hoped to lose a bit more weight than i did this morning. I'm a very demanding person, especially towards myself. I'm very happy with what i've eaten yesterday. I'm also very surprised i haven't binged. Usually when i restrict this much, i will almost always binge, except i haven't done that today. I haven't done it either in the last three days at least (except for the salmon maybe but that was sort of a controllable/incalculated binge and my only real food source of friday), so i'm very happy with that. The shame of binging might be so high, that i really refrain from sharing that here, and i've decided for myself that i really wanted to stop those binges.

For tomorrow, i have planned a running session, so i will allow myself to eat a bit more, and i think i will inevitably have to do that if i wanted to prevent myself from binging, which i'm really afraid of... but right now i don't feel like i want to binge fortunately and today was a good day... but tomorrow is another day.


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## Lakigigar

5/07: 63.5 kg / 140.0 lbs / BMI: 18.5
6/07: 62.8 kg / 138.5 lbs / BMI: 18.3
7/07: not home
8/07: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
9/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
10/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
11/07: 63.1 kg / 139.1 lbs / BMI: 18.4
12/07: 62.3 kg / 137.3 lbs / BMI: 18.2
13/07: 62.6 kg / 138.0 lbs / BMI: 18.3
14/07: 62.0 kg / 136.7 lbs / BMI: 18.1
15/07: 61.7 kg / 136.0 lbs / BMI: 18.0
16/07: 61.5 kg / 135.6 lbs / BMI: 18.0
17/07: 60.9 kg / 134.3 lbs / BMI: 17.8


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## whispers_the_wind

Not sure if anyone has said this already, I didn't go trough every post, but if you genuinely want to get healthier then set up regular meals with diverse foods. That includes breakfast (with actual breakfast foods), carbs other than pasta (I can't believe I said that, I love pasta) and more proteins. The "not feeling full" thing might be because your diet lacks something vital (proteins, vitamins, minerals) or because you don't get enough water. The "morning nausea after breakfast" thing might be connected to the food you eat (is it too heavy?), erratic eating habits (eating too much before you went to bed or not eating at all) connected to low blood sugar levels or it may be psychosomatic. 

Maybe you should talk to someone *qualified* who can help you manage introducing changes to your routine and that can work with you on the underlying issues. It'll be tough getting rid of the symptoms and set habits (controlling food intake) alone, since you might not adress the cause it stems from.


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## Lakigigar

I'll restart my logs...

My weight this morning was 62.3 kg / 137.3 lbs / BMI: 18.2


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## Lakigigar

This morning i weighed 66,1kg (BMI 19,3). I didn't like it, so i'm trying to lose a bit of weight. I want to be at 55kg at the end of the year. I'll keep you guys updated!


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## Lakigigar

Well most of it seemed to be water weight. The batteries died out... and i wanted to not weigh myself for a long time, because it can become some kind of obsession lol... You need to know that number in the morning, but i did it in the afternoon and i forgot i did drink a lot yesterday.

This morning, i weighed 63,9kg (-2,2kg) and that's a BMI of 18,4 (a drop of 0,9 points). I feel quite fat, and i really want to be at 55 kg at the end of the year, but that's going to be so hard... That's a BMI of 16. I think that's acceptable, healthy and a realistic goal. I mean 16 isn't in particular healthy, i know, but it's still okay-ish. It's not quite as bad, and i don't think i want to go lower, or except maybe 15.5 but not lower than that.

I don't have an eating disorder. I'm quite sure of that.... It might be disordered, but i have felt like that already, but i feel like i fail, because i can't never really restrict and give up rather quickly... I just binge so often, and i really hate it... I skip real meals and just eat whatever i want to against stress, to feel better and so on... I'm an emotional eater... I just hate it... I need to stop with that. I can't actually change what i eat anymore, and i really want to be a bit less fat... I'd really prefer that.

Also, in some way, i feel deserve of all this. I'm so unworthy of living that i need to starve, so that my physical needs match my mental state. I'm just afraid that i'll stop just eating meals at all... I can't eat days without eating a decent meal, because i'm starting to think that literally everything is just GROSS what i eat... And i've drinked soda drinks a lot (like 3 litres every two days), and i'm starting to drink more & more alcohol (which isn't really good as well, cause they have calories too, and make you fat. I'm probably going to stop drinking it... I need water... I just need to drink tons of water... To combat it... I think i need to like drink 6 liters of water, that's the only way i can stop my bad habits from appearing in my life... Like if i don't actually stop, i would drink like 5 beers a day... Literally or even more... If i still bought red bull in grocery shops, i would drink like maybe 10 to 20 red bulls a day lol. Fortunately i stopped with that, but i just drink way too unhealthy stuff... And i really need to stop that


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## Lakigigar

My weight this morning was 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4 (-0,3). It was 18.7 yesterday, i made a miscalculation.

Today i'm planning not to eat. I just don't want to pff... I might drink some beer though.


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## Lakigigar

13/11: 63.9 kg / 140.9 lbs / BMI: 18.7
14/11: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
15/11: 62.2 kg / 137.1 lbs / BMI: 18.2
16/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3

-> no exercise (except for some walking maybe)

What i've eaten:

Tuesday: mashed potatoes, beef stew (in sauce) and 3 cookies
Wednesday: fast
Thursday: mashed potatoes, beef stew (in sauce) and 6 cookies
Friday: nothing so far at 7pm (and i don't want to eat today either).

It's the last time i've eaten beef... Last time, i promise!


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## Lakigigar

13/11: 63.9 kg / 140.9 lbs / BMI: 18.7
14/11: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
15/11: 62.2 kg / 137.1 lbs / BMI: 18.2
16/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3
17/11: 62.7 kg / 138.2 lbs / BMI: 18.3
18/11: 62.0 kg / 136.7 lbs / BMI: 18.1

On friday: i did eat an additional 8 slices of bread with salami and ham on top of it. I did drink 7 or 8 beers and two glasses of sangria. I also did eat an apple, and i walked / ran 23 km or 15 miles on foot. All after 7pm lol. But i was awake until 12am saturday

On saturday: i ate 4 banana's and i was awake from 7pm to 5am;

On sunday: i did eat spaghetti (200 grams) with bacon and eggs and cheese on top, so i expect to gain some weight tomorrow. 

I'm planning to gradually phase out meat. I have some ham at home, so i'll need to eat that too. It needs to be eaten anyway... I can't throw it away... I will try not to buy any meat anymore. I'm not used to eating a lot of beef cause i actually don't like beef (aside of one exception last week which i didn't like as much, so don't worry i won't eat beef).


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## Lakigigar

13/11: 63.9 kg / 140.9 lbs / BMI: 18.7
14/11: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
15/11: 62.2 kg / 137.1 lbs / BMI: 18.2
16/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3
17/11: 62.7 kg / 138.2 lbs / BMI: 18.3
18/11: 62.0 kg / 136.7 lbs / BMI: 18.1
19/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3
20/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3
21/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3

Pff, very stressful period... I haven't eaten a lot to be honest. My day & night rhythm is totally fucked up (with weird patterns, there is no pattern actually). It's just not good. I haven't lost weight. I assume tomorrow i will lose a weight, if i don't eat a lot than. Cause my weight check of 21/11 actually happened at 20/11 7pm but i assumed i would try to sleep at a normal hour today... (that's 7 more hours to go, and i'm very tired, actually already the entire morning). For some reason, my body demands me to sleep like 12 hours and more...

I've calculated my daily calories intake since 13/11

13/11: 1920 kcal
14/11: 0 kcal
15/11: 2802 kcal
16/11: 2333 kcal (minus 985kcal for exercise + more than half of it was alcohol).
17/11: 420 kcal
18/11: 1687 kcal
19/11: 1383 kcal
20/11: 538 kcal
21/11: 531 kcal (and probably for a 36 hour timeframe + more than half of it was again alcohol (two beers))


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## Lakigigar

13/11: 63.9 kg / 140.9 lbs / BMI: 18.7
14/11: 62.9 kg / 138.7 lbs / BMI: 18.4
15/11: 62.2 kg / 137.1 lbs / BMI: 18.2
16/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3
17/11: 62.7 kg / 138.2 lbs / BMI: 18.3
18/11: 62.0 kg / 136.7 lbs / BMI: 18.1
19/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3
20/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3
21/11: 62.5 kg / 137.8 lbs / BMI: 18.3
22/11: 61.2 kg / 134.9 lbs / BMI: 17.9
23/11: 60.8 kg / 134.0 lbs / BMI: 17.8


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## Lakigigar

24/12: 61.1kg
26/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6

I don't weigh myself every day, because it makes me unhappy and i'm ashamed if i gain a lot... and i don't want to pay attention to it anymore... i thought i'd gain a lot but i was surprised, i actually lost again.

My weight does weird things... I ate christmas eve dinner, and i lose 0.9 kg WTF.


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## Lakigigar

24/12: 61.1kg
26/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6
27/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6

Yesterday i did drink two beers and some spaghetti with creamy spinach. Today, i fasted, didn't eat because i just forgot or i didn't want to... or didn't pay attention to it.


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## Lakigigar

24/12: 61.1kg / BMI: 17.8
26/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6
27/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6
28/12: 59.7kg / BMI: 17.4

I'm almost at my lowest weight ever in adult times, which is 58.7kg!!!


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## Lakigigar

24/12: 61.1kg / BMI: 17.8
26/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6
27/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6
28/12: 59.7kg / BMI: 17.4
29/12: 60.0kg / BMI: 17.5
30/12: 59.4kg / BMI: 17.4


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## Lakigigar

24/12: 61.1kg / BMI: 17.8
26/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6
27/12: 60.2kg / BMI: 17.6
28/12: 59.7kg / BMI: 17.4
29/12: 60.0kg / BMI: 17.5
30/12: 59.4kg / BMI: 17.4
31/12: 59.1kg / BMI: 17.3
01/01: 59.6kg / BMI: 17.4


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## Lakigigar

I could like easily throw up now... i think. It reminds me of my paracetamol intoxication when i tried to kill myself five years ago that way... I failed though. But i became sick, and i feel similar to when that happened...


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## nomedaigual

Lakigigar said:


> I already went. I was fine. Everything was checked.. Blood tests were absolutely perfect.


I'm glad to hear it, you can relax a lil bit on yourself knowing you are healthy despite your habits.



> I don't have a real hobby. I hate reading, i can't concentrate on reading... My mind wanders always around...


It might also have influence in your depression, as you don't have any distractions from your sorrow. Try watching some good series, for that you don't need almost any concentration, and it keeps you waiting for the next chapter so you have something to expect for. 



> I have eaten something this afternoon but not so much more... I hope i won't binge this night...


Good that you have eaten a little someting. Resist! It only depends on your strenght, you can do it (better said, not do it).



> I have an exam tomorrow... I only have studied half of it yet... and i feel miserable.


What do you study, btw? If you have already studied half of it it means you have chances to pass  normally if you study 7 lessons of 10 you pass. Study them all is more for knowledge (good, but not necessary)


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## Lakigigar

nomedaigual said:


> It might also have influence in your depression, as you don't have any distractions from your sorrow. Try watching some good series, for that you don't need almost any concentration, and it keeps you waiting for the next chapter so you have something to expect for.


Well, i have troubles concentrating on that as well.



> What do you study, btw? If you have already studied half of it it means you have chances to pass  normally if you study 7 lessons of 10 you pass. Study them all is more for knowledge (good, but not necessary)


Geography. I'm almost done. I learned 120 pages in one day, while being sick LOL.


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## nomedaigual

Lakigigar said:


> Well, i have troubles concentrating on that as well.


Hummm, what about anime? for silly anime you need even less concentration than with a normal serie, as most of them have simple plots, and you don't even have to really pay attention (I'm thinking about romantic comedies or shounen). Now I'm watching kaguya-sama. I also liked your lie in april, paradise kiss and toradora! Those were romantic. Funny: yuri yuri aaand I don't remember more. Shounen: fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood (alphonse is an INFP), soul eater. I'm sure I've watched better animes than those but recently the webpage where I watched and listed series closed (( and I have fishmemory.



> Geography. I'm almost done. I learned 120 pages in one day, while being sick LOL.


That is INSANE. Man I feel proud of myself when I read 5 pages. I'm flipping out right now.


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## Lakigigar

LOL, my mom noticed that i lost weight... She said like: "how did you even lose more weight?".

Again 59,4kg.


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## Lakigigar

59,9kg now...

This is what i've eaten in terms of calories last week (i started keeping track of it)


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## Lakigigar

59.1 kg today, didn't each much yesterday...


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## Lakigigar

58.6kg this morning. That's a BMI of 17,1 because my height is 185 cm.

that's my lowest weight since at least 2011-2012 ever... In 2011-2012 i weighed more than i did now, because i weighed over 60kg, and i was 15-16 years old back than. I'm now 23.


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## Panorama

Same height as me an i'm 80kg. :smug:

I was 84 but I stopped eating fried chips. 

I'm this heavy naturally as I swim 2km a week.


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## Lakigigar

Panorama said:


> Same height as me an i'm 80kg. :smug:
> 
> I was 84 but I stopped eating fried chips.
> 
> I'm this heavy naturally as I swim 2km a week.


LOL, i ate fried chips twice last week...


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## Panorama

Lakigigar said:


> LOL, i ate fried chips twice last week...


what kind of sauce do you use there?


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## Lakigigar

Panorama said:


> what kind of sauce do you use there?


joppie sauce










https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joppiesaus



> Joppiesaus is a Dutch snack sauce. It is a cold, yellow sauce available in fast food restaurants throughout the Netherlands and Belgium. The sauce is usually consumed with fries, hamburger or other fast food snacks.





> Joppiesaus is based on vegetable oil, water and an emulsifier. It also contains onion and curry powder.[1][2] The original recipe is kept a secret, but on the web one can find recipes that match the original taste closely.


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## Panorama

will try for sure, thanks!


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## Lakigigar

Panorama said:


> will try for sure, thanks!


I don't think it's easily available, but it's worth the try. It's so good.


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## Lakigigar

59.3 kg this morning (yesterday 59kg)
Ate a little bit less than 1600 kcal today


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## Lakigigar

59.1 kg 

Cal intake today: 390 kcal.

Constipation fortunately is over... I was able to go finally. But i felt very stressed today, which is why i've not eaten much.


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## Lakigigar

Despite the 300 kcal intake, i didn't lose weight again ((... Why is it so impossible to get below the fucking 59's. FFS. I really want to binge (and preferrably purge afterwards ugh).

It's 6pm, and i've only eaten 273 kcal so far. I'm having violent and angry suicidal and self-harm thoughts.... I really don't know how long i'll be able to continue this madness... It needs to stop...


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## Lakigigar

Well i binged, and i purged again today... Ugh

I'll have to exercise tomorrow as well (fuck it).


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## Lakigigar

Today i gained weight ((( NOOOO.

I went to the grocery shop... and i think i'll do something different next time... I bought some meat as well, but i have a plan to make it easier for myself to become vegetarian. From now on, i'll order my groceries on the internet and they'll be sorted out for me, and i'll get the package that i'll just have to pay for. For someone with social phobia, it's easier + it allows me to buy my groceries in bigger amounts in a grocery shop in the city and that's also way cheaper, and where there is much more vegetarian and vegan food. 

First, i'll become a vegetarian, that'll already be hard to do, and is the most important thing, and now i have a decent plan.

I also ran again today, and it was a good, short but very intensive and it motivated me. I think i burned like 300 kcal, not much, but i bet i'll have burned more calories than i'll have purged calories yesterday (LOL).

I have eaten: 988 kcal
I've burned: 277 kcal


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## Lakigigar

Weight this morning: 58.7 kg (BMI: 17.1)

That's my lowest weight ever. Yesterday however i burned more calories than i've eaten lol...


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## Lakigigar

Well i purged again... I binged on chocolate a lot. I ate over 3500 kcal today, and i did purge in the toilet like for half an hour... . Not fun!


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## SilverFalcon

@Lakigigar

I have fast moved through the thread and frankly I think you are hurting yourself with your diet.

Mostly what I see it is based on processed grains, cow dairy and some particular veggies. You are missing essential nutrients and you are filling yourself with potentially dangerous stuff.

While minority of people are coeliac, lot more people are to some degree intolerant to gluten and gluten, not being able to be completely digested can be source of (inflammatory) issues over time if consumed in large quantities. Intolerance to cow milk is also common. If you have either or just inflammation that loosens your gut junctions leading to elevated intestinal permeability, there is a lot to go wrong. Add to it stuff like spinach that is high in oxalates (chockolate as well) and you have quite plausible explanation for your suffering.

My advice is to look up this article, not only for the particular recommended diet, but also for specified groups of foods they have experience with having negative consequences:

CLINICAL EXPERIENCE AND RESEARCH WITH THE PALEOLITHIC KETOGENIC DIET (PKD) – 2010-2017

Here is long, but extremely interesting presentation about oxalates and consequences of over-consumption or consumption under decreased ability to dispose of them:





I would recommend to check this site dedicated to experiences with applying meat based elimination diet to heal gut and with it a lot of chronic diseases including depression, autoimmune conditions etc...
Mood/mental health Archives - Meat Heals

Here is a short article on relation of deficiencies in vegan and vegetarian diets related to mental health:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/diagnosis-diet/201709/the-vegan-brain

Here is comprehensive material on all meat diets and health.
https://justmeat.co/

A good short summary video on the diet can be found here:





I would recommend to:
- Add enough quality meat, especially fatty fish and possibly organ meats like liver as wonderful natural source of vitamins (without overdoing it, its really high in some)
- Cut off at least grains, cow milk, vegetable oils, high oxalate foods, seeds and nuts, legumes and nightshades (Solanales) for some time and see if you improve as these can be very problematic if you develop gut issues.
- Potentially you can try what I did after having chronic fatigue syndrome for a year after being exposed to lyme disease and high dose of antibiotics, trying strict meat (fat) and water diet. Note that while being accustomed to high carb low fat diet it might be hard for some time to adapt. I am now doing it for several months, being pleased with the results, but you can try it just for a month and see.

Forget about BMI and weight, it is not important, the health and strength is. If you give up high carb diet you will lose even more weight, some being water bound by glucose, some being fat as you will be burning more fat. But you will likely feel more energy, mental balance and heal.


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## Lakigigar

are you a fucking troll. i don't want meat. i at least care about animals. I'LL NEVER EAT BEEF DUDE.


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## Lakigigar

Despite the binges yesterday (and purging), i still LOST weight haha. I'm now 58.6kg.


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## SilverFalcon

Lakigigar said:


> are you a fucking troll. i don't want meat. i at least care about animals. I'LL NEVER EAT BEEF DUDE.


It is your choice what value you attribute to your health and what value you attribute to your ideals. 

I just protest the label you attribute to me in bad faith.


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## Lakigigar

My weight this morning was 58,0kg... I was surprised about the weight loss, but nevertheless i wanted to restrict today... My BMI has dropped to 16,9 now.


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## Lakigigar

I purged again... My heartbeat went from 50 this morning to 105-110 now after purging and because of stress... It's super fast right now... I'm quite stressed lol.


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## Lakigigar

I purged yesterday as well (that seem to be new symptom in my ED and it's horrible)
Today i didn't purge (yet), although i'm super sick (potentially because of purging yesterday). I have pretty bad diarhhoea so in a sense i purged actually again (non-intentionally), and didn't eat much which caused me to drop most of the weight that i gained this week because i'm getting dehydrated because of all the purging and diarhoea!!!

I have been purging (and the sessions take a long time) quite a few times in march

1/03: Purged once
2/03: Didn't purge
3/03: Purged twice
4/03: Purged once (but not much, as i was disturbed during my purge behaviour)
5/03: Purged twice!!!
6/03: Purged once (1500 kcal binge), but very long and rough session
7/03: Didn't purge, but was sick and ate less than 300 calories

During one purge session, i of course vomit more than once and multiple times... and i'm often on the toilet for half an hour and longer...


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## Lakigigar

57.8 kg this morning... I did hit a New LOWEST WEIGHT!!! I'm so happy!!!










My calorie intakes of the past 30 days.

February used to be a restricting month, but march has certainly been the bulimia (b/p) month so far ugh.


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## Lakigigar

I'm currently in hospital. I went from 57.5kg to 75.5 kg and am now at a weight of 66,1 kg. Will periodically update (not everyday). I rapidly gained during end of march / april and beginning of may and got admitted into hospital with 75.5kg. I now lost luckily a lot of kg's to feel a lot better again. Would love to hit my LW again, but they're also talking about admitting forcefully to an ED clinic.

I had to learn stop bingeing and purgeing, and since i stopped purging, i've been able to lose weight again. PURGING doesn't work. One meal a day and discipline does work instead to lose weight. I do not recommend purging.


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## Lakigigar

My latest diets have been like this

Wed 11/09 to wed 18/09 skipped all meals, incl. breakfast / dinner and supper but had binges
Between 18/09 and 20/09 i fasted
This weekend, i ate pancakes, candies, macaroni (sunday afternoon), pancakes (sunday morning) and croque madames and succeeded in maintaining weight which was my goal.

When i'm back home, i'll fast and do the one meal a day diet technique.


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## Lakigigar

22/06
25 cl of coca cola (soda drink) - 105 kcal
3 scrambled eggs - 253 kcal
bacon 100 grams - 216 kcal
5 chocolate bars - 217 kcal each = 1085 kcal
Total intake: 1659 kcal
Running:








Burned: 535 kcal
Net calories intake: 1126 kcal
Weight: 75,6 kg
BMI: 22,1


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## Lakigigar

Well currently i have a weight of 64kg. I have a BMI of 18.7. I have decided to stop smoking, and i live in a co-housing project. They all agree that i'm becoming vegetarian starting next tuesday! I like the challenge... i'm going to be a vegetarian infp!!!


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