# Which Enneagram Type Do You Find Most Difficult to Understand?



## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

Which type do you find most difficult to understand or relate to? Why?


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## Grey (Oct 10, 2009)

For me, the hardest types to understand are the types that I once considered myself to be, such as Types Five and One. Without my personal experience in thinking I am one, it's like a total disconnect in the fact that I have to learn about the type all over again. Something about relating to the type you believe you are skews the view for me, and often in a worse way than it was before.

The type I find it hardest to _relate_ to is Type Nine - only on the unhealthy levels, though, which may be said for all of the other types. I find it hard to understand or want to grasp the perspective of someone who I deem quite lazy and not willing to take control. Average to healthy Nines, though, I can get along with just fine. In deep relationships, I find the biggest friction occurs between Sixes and I. My best friend is a 6w7, and although we trust each other greatly, there are times she will defer herself to me... and stay that way. Someone who needs to be told every step to do something really nags me.


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## Fanille (Sep 3, 2009)

For me it would have to be Type Six, although that could be because the Sixes I know IRL are all unhealthy and either worry too much about things (which is very difficult for me to relate to, as I tend to be calm and rational in tense situations) or are overly clingy, and neither of these tendencies work well with me.


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## Lucretius (Sep 10, 2009)

Type 1's can irritate the hell out of me.


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## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

MannyP said:


> For me it would have to be Type Six, although that could be because the Sixes I know IRL are all unhealthy and either worry too much about things (which is very difficult for me to relate to, as I tend to be calm and rational in tense situations) or are overly clingy, and neither of these tendencies work well with me.



That's interesting. Although fear is often beneath the surface, most people are amazed at how calm I appear to be. Of course, most people never get past the wall I keep up.


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## Harley (Jul 5, 2009)

In terms of understanding (not relating though, since I don't bother to type ppl IRL) I would say six, since from what I've read they tend to be diverse in how they behave in relation to all that phobic and counter-phobic business, which can cause them to appear like any other type on the Enneagram. Also, since they tend to submerge their fear and anxiety (whether by complying with people, or confronting their fears) it would be hard in real life to see that core since it wouldn't be displayed.


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## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

Harley said:


> In terms of understanding (not relating though, since I don't bother to type ppl IRL) I would say six, since from what I've read they tend to be diverse in how they behave in relation to all that phobic and counter-phobic business, which can cause them to appear like any other type on the Enneagram. Also, since they tend to submerge their fear and anxiety (whether by complying with people, or confronting their fears) it would be hard in real life to see that core since it wouldn't be displayed.



If you care to understand type 6 (or any other type for that matter) better, I would recommend learning about body language and/or NLP . We try to hide what's under the surface but our bodies cannot lie.


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## Sily (Oct 24, 2008)

Azrael said:


> Type 1's can irritate the hell out of me.


1st, I laughed. Then I thought, damn... he's right. I voted 1 before I saw your post.


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## susurration (Oct 22, 2009)

Wow, I'm actually really attracted to 1's. 

It is the unhealthy, straight 9 (as in, no wings) I understand and can relate to theoretically, but then I see it in a person who is close to me... and I just don't get it. It's hard having a nine for a parent, and being a nine oneself. They withdraw, but you can't withdraw, because you have to deal with what they aren't dealing with. Seeing extreme withdrawing in action is a strange and sometime frustrating experience for me. It is like looking into a mirror for the first time, and not liking what it's showing you. 

I think being a nine, I can understand the other types quite well. Some less than others. But it is the nine that conflicts me most of all, because I havent grasped 'me' yet. 
_
"However, what they generally do not have is a sense of really inhabiting themselves—__a strong sense of their own identity. _ _ Ironically, therefore, the only type the Nine is not like is the Nine itself. Being a separate self, an individual who must assert herself against others, is terrifying to Nines. They would rather melt into someone else or quietly follow their idyllic daydreams" _

This is turning out to be an intriguing poll. Thanks Aubrey, I will be watching this.


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## Harley (Jul 5, 2009)

aubrey said:


> If you care to understand type 6 (or any other type for that matter) better, I would recommend learning about body language and/or NLP . We try to hide what's under the surface but our bodies cannot lie.


I find this interesting, in that I would assume sixes' would purposefully manipulate their body language in order to hide what's underneath. For instance I would assume that phobic sixes' would put on a calm front and be compliant, and have a relaxed body language so as to not stir up trouble that would cause them fear, while a counter-phobic would puff themselves up and have very harsh physical movements to make themselves appear tougher than they really are. 

I'm guessing you mean the more unconscious type of body language or that sixes' aren't as aware of their physical presence as other types.


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## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

Harley said:


> I find this interesting, in that I would assume sixes' would purposefully manipulate their body language in order to hide what's underneath. For instance I would assume that phobic sixes' would put on a calm front and be compliant, and have a relaxed body language so as to not stir up trouble that would cause them fear, while a counter-phobic would puff themselves up and have very harsh physical movements to make themselves appear tougher than they really are.
> 
> I'm guessing you mean the more unconscious type of body language or that sixes' aren't as aware of their physical presence as other types.


Learning to decipher what is relaxed versus an attempt to go unnoticed or confident versus overcompensation is what is so useful about the study of body language and NLP. You've nailed the body language of a counterphobic six, but your interpretation could use a little work. The tough guy act in body language (and verbal for that matter) is distinctly different from that of a person who is truly confident. Also, a phobic six visibly shrinks so as to go unnoticed. This is not the body language of a relaxed person.

A great example of the body language of a counterphobic six would be a situation I had with a guy I know. I started discussing Enneagram with him. When I told him that I knew his type, his chest puffed out (overcompensation) and his eyes went wide (fear) for a split second. I started telling him some of the characteristics of type 6, he started flashing half smiles (contempt) while restricting his arm movements (inferiority).


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## TurranMC (Sep 15, 2009)

My type followed by my two favorite types have the most votes. Interesting.


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## Aerorobyn (Nov 11, 2009)

1's can really irritate the heck out of me IRL, but I'm only speaking from experience with them. Not all are like that.


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## Briggs (Aug 23, 2009)

2.......when they completely defy logic to 'help'


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## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

TurranMC said:


> My type followed by my two favorite types have the most votes. Interesting.



Those numbers keep changing. Which are your two favorite types and why?


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## TurranMC (Sep 15, 2009)

aubrey said:


> Those numbers keep changing. Which are your two favorite types and why?


Since I've looked at the test the most voted type was 1, my type. Six and Eight have been tied for second place, coincidentally also tied for my second favorites after my own type. As for why, I have opinions on the types that I'd rather not share here . You can ask me another time if you're really interested.


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## thedoubter (Dec 25, 2009)

*It depends on what type you are*

Loaded question LOL Some types has issues and conflicts, some get on very well, it depends on the two people and their types... 

I find that the Triads get on with each other better, for example I'm a Six, I tend to make friends with other sixes, strong 5, 9, and 4's. Not to say that I wouldn't like you if you were a One or Two, but my history says, I have some issues with Two's regarding my type.... it might be different for other types...I rarely befriend Three's because of our different personality style, even if my 3,6,9 merges...

This is a generalization of what I'm experiencing and not the general of the type.


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## priestess (Dec 2, 2009)

Azrael said:


> Type 1's can irritate the hell out of me.


any particular reason? or is that self evident for everyone?

I don't really understand why ones would so so difficult to fathom...

I do understand why people dislike the unhealthy "ones". Ones can be very judgmental, rigid and angry sometimes. :angry:

But ones also have good qualities. These ones are so good they're practically angelic.:bored:

Maybe you haven't met the healthy ones.


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## priestess (Dec 2, 2009)

The type I have the most difficulty understanding -

*Sixes* Although I've been to enneagram seminars and have studied it for a long time, I just don't get type 6. The phobic and counterphobic aspects do confuse me. Sixes seem to be a bundle of contradictions. The use of body language interpretations which Aubrey mentioned earlier seems like an interesting approach to getting a handle on individual sixes. 

I have met sixes that I get along famously with. I seem very comfortable with this type.




aubrey said:


> Which are your two favorite types and why?


I like all types for the most part. It really depends on the relative health of the individual. I have during various times in my life been involved or attracted to different Enneagram types. It's as if I went through a phase that involved interacting with particulartypes in order to learn something that would contribute to my personal growth (specifically Twos, Threes, Fives & Nines) Why these types? I don't know. Types seem to come in clusters to me - the "flavor of the month" changes.

My current favorites: * Fours* and *Sevens* (although I have no current relationships with either type):

*Fours* - I'm attracted to the emotional, romantic and idealistic elements of the type. I'm looking to get in touch with my passionate side. Also One goes to Four when One disintergrates. I'd like to spend some time walking on the dark side (as long as no one ends up getting hurt - probably an impossibility).

*Sevens* - I'd like to have more fun and spontaneity in my life. Seven is my type for integration. I admire Sevens ability to enjoy life, be free and happy.


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## Narrator (Oct 11, 2009)

priestess said:


> any particular reason? or is that self evident for everyone?
> 
> I don't really understand why ones would so so difficult to fathom...
> 
> ...


Any sign of Te and I'm stumped.

Thinking of body language, I was able to identify my philosophy teacher as a six(w5) half due to his body language, always moving, subtly twitchy, fidling with bits, a sense of him being 'switched on' all the time.

Sixes are kind've Se and P if you wanna try and make a little sense (though not necc. MBTI wise), with an inner world of chaos. I think David from Six feet under is a brilliant example of a six(w7 )who goes through the spectrum...The lower end of the spectrum...
Faith from buffy is another possible six (sx/sp 6w7 or 8w7). Willow was a sp/sx 6w7.
Frollo from the hunchback (both in the book and the movie) is a brilliant example of a sx/sp 6w5 (definate 1w9 in his triad).
Nathaniel Fisher Sr is another 6w5.
If you've seen greenwing, Caroline sp/so and Martin so/sp were both 6w7s.
I realise this is mainly 6w7, I'll find some more 6w5 examples in a bit.

On body language again: I think 6w7s (atleast) are not so good at keeping their emotions clamped out of physical expression, from the start there's all that nervous energy (in average and lower), also, they're a reactive type.
"6w7s can't easily disguise feelings, or rather don't choose to most of the time. 6w5s disguise their feelings just fine for the most part. 6s secretly tend to _like_ being wound up and often make a huge problem out of "nothing"." It's been said 6s (6w7s) can be complainers in the lower average levels. This is probably connected with their...connection to the external, it can manifest in pessimistically pointing out all the negatives/dangers of a situation, complaining, asking others for advice, or just reacting counterphobically to things. A 6w5 or 6 at 3 is less likely to make any 'noise'. 9s can be mistaken for 6s if they disintergrate badly, blowing up and becoming reactive like the six, taking on negative scanning of environment whether financially or about safety bits and bobs (I've not really read this, but I've seen it in a couple of 9 males I know, both fathers).

Take a character like Faith, she reacts/self-destructs, and finally calms down when she's found someone who will stick by her and be her rescuer (The 'rescuer' being a BIG theme in the 6 and often 4). It's like a child who has no boundaries; a very insecure place to be.

Think in the movie Chocolate, not neccesarily that any characters are sixes, but of the situation of the little girl and her mother. With them constantly moving, never ever settling anywhere, the girl isn't going to feel that _safe _home base, there are no strict borderlines to say 'This is where I am'. So she gets upset, naturally, when her mother decides to move again. Think of sixes as if they have that mother inside them always, constantly bouncing, moving, changing.


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## priestess (Dec 2, 2009)

Liminality said:


> Any sign of Te and I'm stumped.


That's interesting. I've never thought of it that way. Ones are most always Te, I would think. I guess you're an F.




Liminality said:


> Thinking of body language, I was able to identify my philosophy teacher as a six(w5) half due to his body language, always moving, subtly twitchy, fidling with bits, a sense of him being 'switched on' all the time.


Yeah. This body language stuff is starting to make more sense. I met a woman at an enneagram seminar. She was a lot like that. In some ways, she seemed very uncomfortable in her skin. Yet, she was very likeable and pleasant to be around. Still the awkwardness. I would think that would make some other people feel uncomfortable as well.


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## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

priestess said:


> The type I have the most difficulty understanding -
> 
> *Sixes* Although I've been to enneagram seminars and have studied it for a long time, I just don't get type 6. The phobic and counterphobic aspects do confuse me. Sixes seem to be a bundle of contradictions. The use of body language interpretations which Aubrey mentioned earlier seems like an interesting approach to getting a handle on individual sixes.
> 
> I have met sixes that I get along famously with. I seem very comfortable with this type.


It's hard to get a good description of a six out there because of aspects like phobic versus counterphobic. We can also have an obsession with dependency versus independency. As far as fear goes, we may be afraid of everything or afraid and unable to identify a source. I think there is a running theme to each of these qualities to the life of the individual, but we can still easily hit the opposite end of our norm under stressful situations. I think cognitive function plays a big part in it too.


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## Liontiger (Jun 2, 2009)

I chose 1, 2, and 5 because that's what my gut told me to choose. :laughing: But anyway, I really can't relate to ones despite the fact that they're right next to the nine. I don't set such high moral standards for myself, nor do I feel like I have any particular "mission" to accomplish. The whole concept of setting a fixed standard and trying to match everything up to it is just mind-boggling to me. I'm much too flexible to think of doing anything like this.

I don't know why I chose 2, but I did. I think it has something to do with the fact that the average two annoys me when they try to get up in my personal space or try to help me with things I want to do myself.

I chose 5 even though I tend to score high in it on tests. I actually used to think I was a 5. However, I don't have the same level of focus that a five has. I'm much too flighty. And while I'm mentally curious and intellectual, I'm not like that all the time. I'm also not that independent.

All of the other types I can relate to in some way, especially 4 and 7.


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## Pablonuts25 (Aug 19, 2009)

I voted 8 for obv reasons.

Fucking hate unhealthy 8s.


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## windex (Dec 24, 2009)

Enneagram 7's. If I see a wily eyed happy hyper active person strolling towards me, I run like hell the other way. Robin Williams is my worst nightmare.


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## SFD Six (Jan 16, 2010)

DD: I like Ones! (except they usually don't like me, yeah....)

But the type I find hard to understand are Fours. I know some Fours I really like, but I rarely respect them-- it annoys me especially how they (sometimes) come up to me with their long list of woes; When I try to give them advice, they go onto a ramble about how their life sucks too much for that to work, and when I try to relate, they get all defensive about how their lives are worse than mine's. Then finally, I don't think it's exactly nice to say, "Yeah, your life really _does_ suck! Glad I'm not you!"-- so what exactly am I supposed to say? :crying:

But yeah, I don't hate Fours, I just find it hard to get along sometimes, you know?

(>///< Oh, and I'm totally new here, and I've been too afraid to post until now-- so hi, everyone! :,D)


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## Liontiger (Jun 2, 2009)

SFD Six said:


> DD: I like Ones! (except they usually don't like me, yeah....)
> 
> But the type I find hard to understand are Fours. I know some Fours I really like, but I rarely respect them-- it annoys me especially how they (sometimes) come up to me with their long list of woes; When I try to give them advice, they go onto a ramble about how their life sucks too much for that to work, and when I try to relate, they get all defensive about how their lives are worse than mine's. Then finally, I don't think it's exactly nice to say, "Yeah, your life really _does_ suck! Glad I'm not you!"-- so what exactly am I supposed to say? :crying:
> 
> ...


Hullo hullo hullo and welcome 

If you want to, it would be really great if you introduced yourself in the into forum. I'm sure there are other people who would like to meet you too :3

And about 4s, they enjoy their problems too much to let you solve them :wink:


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## SFD Six (Jan 16, 2010)

:,D Hi! Thank you for welcoming me!

LOL Yeah, I just wrote out something for the Intro forum, but when I tried to post, it told me that I needed 10+ posts to show links, and deleted what I wrote... oh, but I'll try again without links! <33 (or wait until I get 10+ posts?)

XDD Yeah-- but I do know some Fours that're really nice to me, including my mom! Okay, sometimes she won't stop talking about how everybody (supposedly) hates her, but mom is really nice :3

*reads your post* Yeah, I understand about Twos. I like most Twos, too, but I always feel like I owe them and that they're counting the things they've done for me.... *shudder* It makes me feel bad sometimes! (LOL And I thought I was a Five for about two years myself XDD)

I admire Ones myself, but I think I disappoint most of them ;~; "You didn't procrastinate? You're actually going to do something? _You have morals?_ ...You must be a saint!" *U* <33


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## Yin Praxis (Jan 16, 2010)

I have more in common with 4s than a number of the other types, but I still have the hardest time understanding them. I feel like I cannot dissect their minds, nor come up with a plan for satisfying their goals. I don't know what to do for them. 

As for relating, as opposed to understanding, I have the hardest time with 7s. I think it's pretty easy for me to figure out their goals, and at least I think I get it, but it's very hard for me to actually identify/empathize with them. I can't put myself in their shoes.

And I see people have a pretty hard time understanding/relating to 1s.


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## Yin Praxis (Jan 16, 2010)

Liminality said:


> Any sign of Te and I'm stumped.





priestess said:


> That's interesting. I've never thought of it that way. Ones are most always Te, I would think. I guess you're an F.


So it is often said. I, however, am a Ti-dom 1.


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## compulsiverambler (Jan 7, 2010)

Pablonuts25 said:


> I voted 8 for obv reasons.
> 
> Fucking hate unhealthy 8s.


Yes, unlike other types, I feel uncomfortable around even average Eights. Healthy Eights can be fun, but any less and their confrontational interaction style and efforts to show that they're more powerful and competent than others when they want leverage over people (often by making them feel or appear small or useless, veiled transparently by humour) can make me nervous and resentful. As a Five, their strengths are my weaknesses, and as weakness irritates them, they don't seem to have much respect for me (at least, the one I know well doesn't).

And yet, I wouldn't say that I have trouble understanding them. Having read one of Riso and Hudson's unabridged descriptions of them, their behaviours and thought processes do make sense to me. I have a lot of sympathy for the less than healthy ones.


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## The Scorched Earth (May 17, 2010)

As a type 4, I'm resurrecting this thread to say that I don't get 9s. The way they act as if everything in the world is all right when it clearly is not, and that people are all right when they clearly are not. They're like wannabe Buddhas who seem afraid to jump in the fray and chaos of life.


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## The Exception (Oct 26, 2010)

I voted 2 and 8. Maybe I'm biased though because those are my lowest scoring type. 2's often act in ways opposite of me. I have a tendency to distance myself and want to pull away and 2's want to get closer and more affectionate. That conflict can cause stress because our needs and motives are completely opposite. 8's can be difficult but its mainly the unhealthy ones. I don't do well with overbearing, angry people in general. Other types can be like this two but its probably the worst in unhealthy 8's.


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## jbking (Jun 4, 2010)

*Huh...*

3, 8 and 9s are the ones I don't quite get. Being a 1w2, I can understand both of those easily enough. 4 and 7 are those disintegration/integration points for a One that make some sense to my mind. As for 5s and 6s, these are more within my tri-type to some degree which just leaves me with that other threesome I initially stated.

I suspect 3s could be kind of like a mirror in terms of being that hard-working, get things done but somehow it just rubs me the wrong way in a sense. 8s and 9s though just have a different take on the gut that just trips me up I suspect.


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## Scruffy (Aug 17, 2009)

Interesting @jbking , I find that I have the most difficulty understanding the type 1.

Even though 4s are both a wing of mine, and in the image center. I find them quite hard to understand, because our brains work in reverse to each other.


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## Sina (Oct 27, 2010)

screamofconscious said:


> Which type do you find most difficult to understand or relate to? Why?


*Most difficult to relate to and understand:* Type 4, Type 2

*Type 4:* I don't understand Type 4s because I haven't known any in person, and their motivations seem so different from mine. I wonder what it's like to be a Four. From my limited knowledge of the enneagram, 4s seem like sensitive, artistic types who can be painfully aware of their flaws, and may possibly have very conflicted emotional lives. I know two Fours here, and they seem very intuitive and emotionally aware. 

Some of my favourite poets,writers/directors, authors are fours, and I deeply admire the creativity and uniqueness of fours, in general. 
They produce some amazing art:happy:
If I ever get a chance to know one closely, I would make use of that opportunity. It may be better to say that fours seem enigmatic and difficult to understand because of this. 

I am wondering if Marlon Brando was a four. But, his aggression and bad temper, desire to fight for the rights of oppressed groups, erratic and counter-authoritarian work habits and so on make me wonder if he were a more aggressive type like an 8 or counter-phobic six. I also know that he was constantly mistrustful, especially of those who complimented him for his acting and viewed them as opportunistic sycophants. But, I digress.


*Type 2: *I do not relate to unhealthy 2s. I just don't get them! They violate my personal space, make heavy emotional demands on me, try to cling to me, complain incessantly about how I have "never" cared for them (which is an untrue as it could be), expect repayment in the form of 'love', tend to have stalker-like tendencies that tick me the hell-off. I find unhealthy 2s so suffocating and manipulative. The worst part is that they continue to believe that through all their ridiculousness, they have the noblest intentions and assert that they feel "love" for me. The indirectness drives me up the damn wall. They walk around dropping hints, expecting me to read their minds and then become resentful when their (unspoken) wishes aren't fulfilled. They can be extremely controlling, but in a passive-aggressive, whiny way that I find downright cowardly and stupid. 


_Side note_: Ones can be extremely irritating when they start being all nit picky and snappy, which I mainly see as unnecessary interference that's slowing me down. Though, I have to admit that, sometimes, if I were to put my impatience with details aside and pay attention to the One, I could actually benefit from it:wink: Ones can also be argumentative, and I enjoy that unless they become very rigid and set in their ways. I have a strong desire to push against them at such times. Overall, I like their efficiency and superb organizational skills. When I work with a One and our goals are in alignment, we always end up accomplishing a lot. I see a lot of mutual respect in this association.


I have seen a lot of people mention unhealthy eights, and I am not surprised. I can empathize with you guys and with the unhealthy eights, though I neither condone nor respect the behaviour. I understand exactly where they are coming from.


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## OrangeAppled (Jun 26, 2009)

2s & 6s can puzzle and annoy me at times. 8s can be intimidating and sometimes can revolt me if very unhealthy. I don't meet enough of them to have a solid opinion on the type though.


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## Raichan (Jul 15, 2010)

Type 3, because (sorry not to say I'm superior, I know I'm not) I don't understand why too much inner-self emphasis should ever be made on achievements defined by image, culture or social sphere.

Or maybe I'm still ignorant about 3's.


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## Raichan (Jul 15, 2010)

Ice Ghost said:


> As a type 4, I'm resurrecting this thread to say that I don't get 9s. The way they act as if everything in the world is all right when it clearly is not, and that people are all right when they clearly are not. They're like wannabe Buddhas who seem afraid to jump in the fray and chaos of life.



Hahahahah

It might be because as type 4's, we tend to see (even at emotional level) that reality is a paradox of being extremely ever-changing and extremely predictable, thus we spent a lot of time trying to adapt our identities to that. Especially that we identify a lot through connecting our emotions, all the vulnerabilities and strengths, to the mental or socially shared construct of reality.

So we might at times get a little intolerant of type 9’s, because we might be thinking that they won’t be able to see the emotionally chaotic states we see, when healthy 9’s are actually most likely to see them but adjust to an idealized reality form to maintain balance and harmony.

Type 4’s and Type 9’s share this in common probably: the emphasis on innermost harmony and the connections behind it. We can recognize the absence and presence of harmony very quickly. Type 4 may not emphasize on harmony as much, but type 4 recognizes it, even with the ‘’I wonder why I am different’’ feeling.

Although….. damn… I’m not an Enneagram expert. These are all my assumptions of course.
:blushed:


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## perennialurker (Oct 1, 2009)

I am really surprised by the poll results showing Ones being regarded as the most difficult to understand. I voted Fours, not because I dislike them, but just because they are so very different from me I suppose.


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## Spades (Aug 31, 2011)

I think I can actually relate to every type...except Two's.


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## Yves (May 11, 2011)

For me, Type 1, Type 4, and Type 7 are patterns difficult to understand.


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## Coburn (Sep 3, 2010)

Fives and nines.


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## Promethea (Aug 24, 2009)

2


tenchar...


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## Persephone (Nov 14, 2009)

Type 2's need for affirmation and "need to be needed" confuse the hell out of me.


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## ImminentThunder (May 15, 2011)

I find it hard to understand Nines. I can relate to the desire for peace, but _how_ are they always so calm?! It's like nothing ever bothers them...I'm somewhat jealous of that.


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## soya (Jun 29, 2010)

ImminentThunder said:


> I find it hard to understand Nines. I can relate to the desire for peace, but _how_ are they always so calm?! It's like nothing ever bothers them...I'm somewhat jealous of that.


As a 9 sx I can say that restraint, not true constant calmness, is the key to maintaining that appearance. I generally feel that others need me to be calm, so that's what I do.


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## The Great One (Apr 19, 2010)

I have a problem with type 1's because they are very stuck in their own ways, and are very closed minded. They irritate the hell out of me. 

Then, there are the pure counter-phobic six's. The counter-phobic sixes can be absolutely entertaining to hang out with or they can be your worst nightmare. When they are unhealthy they are most terrifying type....think Mel Gibson's character from Lethal Weapon and you will know what I'm talking about. They don't care if they die, don't care if they go jail, and at their unhealthiest stage can be bat-shit crazy.


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## Wake (Aug 31, 2009)

timeless said:


> I can understand 8, 5, 4 and 1 without really thinking about it.
> 3, 7, 9, 2 require slightly more thought but still it's pretty easy.
> 6 is a bit harder but I think I have a grasp on that.


Agreed. 6's mindset is based on anxiety and the variations which come from this are pretty large.

Being a 1 this is probably biased, but I think we're pretty simple to understand. We just follow what we know is right and wrong, and this applies to logic or moral matters. We often strive for improvement and avoidance of conflict with our conscience, so we just be shown that a way is better to take a new one up which does not risk our values. This may create a tendency towards inflexibility, but we don't act on at a whim due to a cautious approach. People don't relate too much, no surprise there.

The types are cake to understand if you start off at the core then understand the rest of the tendencies from there. It's not easy to remember it all though, but for me personal experience is relied on heavily to reinforce knowledge given to me.

I relate to all types to some degree as I use each of their motivations every day.


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## The Great One (Apr 19, 2010)

Promethea said:


> 2
> 
> 
> tenchar...


This makes sense to me. I've seen a lot of your posts on here and you sound a lot like my brother, who is an INTJ 5 w 6 SP/SO. INTP's are not exactly known to be the giving type, so this would make sense to me. Keep in mind that this is not an insult....no in fact I respect you very much as a person. It's just that INTx's aren't really know for there warmth and cheer and I know this. Therefore, it would make sense that you would find it hard to relate to 2's. Also keep in mind that if you clearly are an INTP, then Fe is one of your least used functions. But it is practically the bread and butter of Fe.


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## The Great One (Apr 19, 2010)

> Therefore, it would make sense that you would find it hard to relate to 2's. Also keep in mind that if you clearly are an INTP, then Fe is one of your least used functions. But it is practically the bread and butter of Fe.


"It is the bread and butter of the enneagram 2".

**fixed**

NOTE: Sorry, you guy's edit post was not working properly.


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## The Great One (Apr 19, 2010)

I should also that I also don't seem to get along with 8 w 7's. The 8 w 9's I can deal with, but the 8 w 7's can be overly aggressive IMO.


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## The Great One (Apr 19, 2010)

TO PROMETHIA:

So I see you thanked my particular post. Well, thinking about it more, it would make even more sense why you don't relate to 2's because if I remember correctly, you once believed yourself to be a type 8? So then it would appear that you have a strong 8 fixture. Well, 2's and 8's are generally direct opposites from what I have observed so I can see why you really don't get along with 2's. Really, the only 8's that do seem to get along well with 2's from what I have noticed are ENFJ 8's sense they generally have a strong 2 fixture. Just my observation.


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## soya (Jun 29, 2010)

I voted type 8. 8's are the hardest for me to feel empathy for - that's not to say I don't like them or feel sympathy for them, just that I don't often relate on a personal level to 8 type issues.


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## Owfin (Oct 15, 2011)

Most of the withdrawn triad is confusing.

9 seems so... simple, and everything seems so complex to me.

5 confuses me more than most have said. I just do not identify with feeling that sensitive and having to withdraw myself.

4 is the least confusing. I don't identify with trying to differentiate myself from others too much, but I see sort of what they are trying to do.


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

soya said:


> I voted type 8. 8's are the hardest for me to feel empathy for - that's not to say I don't like them or feel sympathy for them, just that I don't often relate on a personal level to 8 type issues.


8s are very easy to understand. they want to do things their way, be independent and be left the fuck alone


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## Wake (Aug 31, 2009)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> 8s are very easy to understand. they want to do things their way, be independent and be left the fuck alone


Her post seemed to be more of an issue that she didn't relate to 8's more than a lack of knowledge. This thread in general seems to be more centered around favorability than understanding other types. The OP asks both, so people prefer to state their subjective feelings before the objective understanding, it's just too hard to resist.


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## The Great One (Apr 19, 2010)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> 8s are very easy to understand. they want to do things their way, be independent and be left the fuck alone


Yes, but many unhealthy 8's are overly-aggressive and are often bullies. This is why so many are hard to deal with.


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

The Great One said:


> Yes, but many unhealthy 8's are overly-aggressive and are often bullies. This is why so many are hard to deal with.


hard to deal with, but easy to understand. unhealthy 2s are easy for me to understand, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to cut off their dick and choke them with it.


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## MuChApArAdOx (Jan 24, 2011)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> hard to deal with, but easy to understand. unhealthy 2s are easy for me to understand, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to cut off their dick and choke them with it.


HAHAHAHA, LMFAO.

I would say two would be the most difficult for me. I don't think my line of thinking would mesh well with them overall. They would see me as aggressive and selfish. Two also seem to agree and hang on to every word i say, this really annoys me. I don't want you to agree with me, i want you to take a stand and say it how it really is. They are too soft for my bitchy ways.


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

MuChApArAdOx said:


> HAHAHAHA, LMFAO.
> 
> I would say two would be the most difficult for me. I don't think my line of thinking would mesh well with them overall. They would see me as aggressive and selfish. Two also seem to agree and hang on to every word i say, this really annoys me. I don't want you to agree with me, i want you to take a stand and say it how it really is. They are too soft for my bitchy ways.


my 2w1 mom and I do not get along at all. I don't hate her and I try keep my distance, but whenever she talks to me I just want to be like "do you ever talk about anything important?! come talk to me when you need me for something. and no, making christmas cards is not needing me. waste your own time with that shit" I try to say a nicer version of this, but it still probably doesn't come off very nice (based on what people have told me about their reactions to my "nice" responses)


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## MuChApArAdOx (Jan 24, 2011)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> my 2w1 mom and I do not get along at all. I don't hate her and I try keep my distance, but whenever she talks to me I just want to be like "do you ever talk about anything important?! come talk to me when you need me for something. and no, making christmas cards is not needing me. waste your own time with that shit" I try to say a nicer version of this, but it still probably doesn't come off very nice (based on what people have told me about their reactions to my "nice" responses)


I work with a type 2 core. She is lovely in her own right, but her wanting to always be the good girl can be so draining. She doesn't have an opinion of her own, she wants to do what everyone else is doing or, wants to do everything the ethical way. Her sweetness comes off more as fake, and...she throws around way too many compliments , it sounds cheesy. She forever what's to help when it isn't asked of her, and this can lead to her being in the way more than anything. I don't relate to her way of thinking, or the why. I believe she is an INFP. I couldn't socialize with her after work hours, her over niceness would drive me completely nuts  I don't dislike her, i just can't get into her frame of mind.


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

MuChApArAdOx said:


> I work with a type 2 core. She is lovely in her own right, but her wanting to always be the good girl can be so draining. She doesn't have an opinion of her own, she wants to do what everyone else is doing or, wants to do everything the ethical way. Her sweetness comes off more as fake, and...she throws around way too many compliments , it sounds cheesy. She forever what's to help when it isn't asked of her, and this can lead to her being in the way more than anything. I don't relate to her way of thinking, or the why. I believe she is an INFP. I couldn't socialize with her after work hours, her over niceness would drive me completely nuts  I don't dislike her, i just can't get into her frame of mind.


I don't mind 2w1 Sp/Sx and Sx/Sp, but So dom 2s...hold that thought
actually, those are the people I get least are So doms. I don't understand needing to belong and be part of a group at all


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## Wake (Aug 31, 2009)

I'm certain type 2's are easily the most naturally equipped to parent a child. They maybe needy, but they're x10 more giving than needy to take issue with it.


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## Owfin (Oct 15, 2011)

Wake said:


> I'm certain type 2's are easily the most naturally equipped to parent a child. They maybe needy, but they're x10 more giving than needy to take issue with it.


But imagine the disaster if the child didn't approve of the two's parenting.


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## Wake (Aug 31, 2009)

Owfin said:


> But imagine the disaster if the child didn't approve of the two's parenting.


Haha, 2w1 father gets emotional but never lashes out at me. True, I guess I always have approved of his decisions not to make a huge conflict.


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

3w2
3w4s are easy to understand, they want to be the best, be glamorous, be sophisticated and stand above the crowd.

3w2s on the other hand I have a difficult time grasping. they want to be successful and achieve fame, but they also want to fit in and be relatable. like they want to be successful, but not "too successful" or something


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## Zerosum (Jul 17, 2011)

I find 1s hardest to understand.. Anyone that requires constant perfection is going to be at logger heads with me.. My previous housemate was a 1 and an epic clean freak and required these constant plans. Needless to say, we didn't live together very wrong and ended up almost killing each other lol


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## The Great One (Apr 19, 2010)

> hard to deal with, but easy to understand. unhealthy 2s are easy for me to understand, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to cut off their dick  and choke them with it.


For that matter, my cousin's rottweiler is easy to understand too, but is still a pain in the ass for me to deal with when it tries to bite the shit out of me.


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

The Great One said:


> For that matter, my cousin's rottweiler is easy to understand too, but is still a pain in the ass for me to deal with when it tries to bite the shit out of me.


so cut off it's dick and choke it with it. lol I kid
that's unfortunate though, I've known a lot of really sweet rottweilers and I think they get a bad wrap as a breed =(


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## Owfin (Oct 15, 2011)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> The Great One said:
> 
> 
> > For that matter, my cousin's rottweiler is easy to understand too, but is still a pain in the ass for me to deal with when it tries to bite the shit out of me.
> ...


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

Owfin said:


>


I'll all for looking out for children, but the youngest people on here are in their teens lol


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## The Great One (Apr 19, 2010)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> so cut off it's dick and choke it with it. lol I kid
> that's unfortunate though, I've known a lot of really sweet rottweilers and I think they get a bad wrap as a breed =(


I know a lot of rottweilers that are sweeter than type 8's.


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

The Great One said:


> I know a lot of rottweilers that are sweeter than type 8's.


there are striking similarities between the two.
at their worst: aggressive, predatory, hostile
at their best: protective, loyal, affectionate


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