# Why is it the more I get into personality types I get more lost about my personality?



## Who_Am_eYe (Mar 13, 2014)

Okay first of all I got into MBTI types about 3 years ago when one of my teachers gave us the test. I remember I got ENTP and after reading about that personality I knew it wasn't me even though I loved the personality of the ENTP (I also adore ENFP's.. these 2 are my favorite, though I'm sure I'm not one of them and I don't know if I know anyone that is one of those 2 types, but I like going through their threads and seeing videos of them talking about themselves :blushed: ) Anyways, even though I knew I got a wrong type from the first test I still wanted to know about the other types & even though usually personality test are just crap and weren't very dependable I was always interested in them and thought there were fun.

So when I learnt what each letter meant I changed the letter I thought I got wrong the first time which was the E/I, so that made me a INTP. I read the INTP description and I thought it fitted me much better the ENTP, so I was like I'm definetly an INTP. I also read every other description, but I think that since I already made my mind that I'm an INTP I couldn't really see my self in any of the other personality types. (I hope that made sense :tongue: )

After that I came to this forum and after reading lots of posts of INTPS and seeing some vids of them explaining how they see things and all that, I felt different from them. Like how most of them don't care much about there relationships with people and how they hated all holidays and occasions and felt like everyday is just the same as the one before, and how they didn't care about social norms (I'm sorry if I offended INTP's with this, it's just that I got the impression that they cared about these much less than I did or most people do.. please correct me if I'm wrong)
Another thing is most of them seemed to like learning and storing new information about everything and I only like learning about things that interest me or things that I need to learn, I also don't feel the need to know how everything is the way it is now (that's probably why I don't like history, unless it helps me understand something I'm interested at the moment) or how things like the internet or a washing machine work.

So it was things like that made me feel like I wasn't an INTP after all. I thought maybe I got the T/F wrong, because I felt like a was more sensitive than a T would be, I am also a sucker for romance, not the shallow love (or lust) at first sight kind, but the deeper kind. But I really wasn't a romantic person outwardly I'm not even the kind to openly share my feelings with anyone, I'm not a hugger or someone who can say I love you.. even with my family. Even though these are things I really really want to be able to do.. I know it's so pathetic! I even got teary eyed just writing it. But I'm just not comfortable at all with these thing and I don't why.. it probably has to do with me being extremely socially anxious. Anyways, For those reason I felt I was more a Feeler than a Thinker even though people say and I also feel that I'm a person who thinks with my head not heart and I am somewhat a logical person. 

So I started reading more about INFP and at first I actually thought it was my type, but after awhile of reading through the forum (I used to have another account and used to post but it was a long time ago and I made this one today) and after seeing the thoughts of other INFPs for some reason I just didn't want to be an INFP I realized that I didn't like that type, not that I didn't like people with that type, it was just that I felt like it was the most weakest and most depressing type to be (I'm really sorry for anyone who finds this offending, but I'm just trying to be honest and this is the impression I got from descriptions, some INFPs thoughts, and from what some other types thought of INFPs).

Somewhere at that time I found about the functions and I thought they were probably more accurate in helping me type myself. But to my disappointment it just made me much more confused and lost. So at that point I stuck with me being an INFP because it was what I thought was closest to being, even though I hated that fact that I was one and kind of felt embarrassed of being one. It probably has a lot to do with how other people made an INFP out to be. 
I also learnt about the enneagram types and I took the test and it said I was a 4. After reading all the other types I felt that 4 was definatley me. And 4w5 fit me the most although I think I see some of me in 4w3, but as I said 4w5 fit much more. 

Anyways, I still had a problem with accepting myself as an INFP so I tried convincing myself that this MBTI thing is just crap and that there are much more factors to my personality than just these functions. I think that's true to some extent (about there being more factors) but I still think there's truth in the MBTI and the functions and it does actually make sense. But thinking that I'm a type that I didn't wanna be was depressing me so eventually I gave up on MBTI. And from time to time I'd get intrigued again by it and go back to reading more and visiting this site but I'd get discouraged and give up again. Two weeks ago I came back mostly because I was bored and wanted something to think about :tongue: (I finished high school last year and even though I got accepted to college and to my parents displeasure I decided that I want to take a year off to relax and think seriously about what I wanted to do for the rest of my life before I went to college, so yeah I've been bored lately and got sucked back into the MBTI world).

I also realized now things about myself that weren't INFPish, like the that I'm no pushover or a doormat which most INFPs seem like. I'm also more prideful? than INFPs, like I would never like someone who doesn't like me, I would never put someone before myself unless they deserve it. (I hope you understand what I'm trying to say :frustrating: ). I'm also not someone that forgives easily if at all. I'm not clingy, even if I LOVE someone I always give them space and expect them to give me some space too. Another thing is I realized most INFPs care so much about animals and animal rights and lots of them are vegetarians. I don't care about those things, I do care but not to the extent that they do. Also I feel like INFPs are non judgmental whereas I'm might be seen as a little bit judgmental. One of the most important things to INFPs is peace. For me there are a lot of thing I wouldn't compromise for peace. (All these traits are traits I've seen INFPs agree on, but please correct me if I'm wrong). Also after I tested my mom a few days ago and she got INFP (I always thought she was ISFP for some reason) anyways she seemed more fitting to the INFP description than I did and since my mom and were different in all of ways I felt like we couldn't be the same type. So these things made me feel sure I wasn't an INFP.

I went back to thinking I'm an INTP but quickly felt out of place between the INTPs, I've also been thinking that I'm could be an INFJ & after reading that the most compatible types for an INFJ are ENXP, I was like I must be an INFJ because I love those types roud: , but then again who wouldn't like them? I knew that I shouldn't take the compatible thing seriously. INFJ also are said to be openly caring which I am not, they're also very comfortable to be around and I don't think I am but again that might be due to my extreme social anxiety. And they are said to be the most extravted introverts and again maybe my social awkwardness is to blame for that.

And speaking of my social anxiety could that be what's making it difficult for me to know my type? I remember reading about unhealthy types, like if you're an unhealthy ESFP you could be a mistyped as an INTJ because when you're an unhealthy (mentally) indivisual you're functions get flipped and you'll seem more like the type opposite of you. I have no idea how true this is. Please let me know if you know anything about that.

Another thing I noticed the last two weeks is while I've been reading some of the type's "You know you're a XXXX when.." threads (I know you shouldn't be using these kinds of threads when you're trying to type yourself).
Anyways, I noticed that a lot of the people who've posted something that got lots of thanks and others agreed with are actually now a different type. So that got me thinking that this is probably why I have a hard time typing myself and it's probably why I hated the idea of being an INFP, maybe 90% of INFPs weren't INFPs and were just going around saying stuff about them that others agreed with and became a characteristic of an INFP when it really has nothing to do with INFPs (I really hope you're getting what I'm saying :frustrating: ).
So now I feel that I'm at the beginning.

What I want to know is how can I be sure what type I am? I really wish I knew someone who is an expert in MBTI types who would listen to all my thoughts and tell me what type I am and point out why. Because it's hard for me to be objective about typing myself and it's hard knowing what's true about a type and what isn't.

I really don't know why I am posting this, I've wrote rants like this before but after getting halfway into writing I'd get bored and not continue with it. Sometimes I actually do finish writing and after seeing how long it took me to write and how little I said I end up not posting it. But this time I'm posting it anyway even though I just wrote down just 1/10 of all the things that were repeating in my mind while writing this. And it actually took me 3 hours to write and you'll probably read it in less than 4 minutes.. isn't that sad? :crying: That is if you read this far.

If you did read this far thank you, and please give me some clear pointers on how to know my type if you have any pointers. And if you got any clues as to which type I am from what I said please let me know.

And again forgive me if I offended anyone and if I got anything wrong about a type please correct me. And another thing is English isn't my 1st language so please ignore any mistyped words and hopefully you'll understand clearly.


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## Dosto Yevsky (Feb 9, 2014)

Because typology is a bullshit fad.


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## Proffessional INFP (May 22, 2013)

Being an infp myself, I can understand why many would prefer not to be classified as such. Just remember a few points about MBTI.
First, it's not a box for you to try to fit yourself into. It's primary purpose is to help you identify how your brain prefers to process information. The key word being prefer. You may not fit exactly within the stated definition of the type that best suits you. That's normal, especially for infp's and similiar types.
Second, your personality is also greatly determined by your values and motivations. MBTI can only tell you about how you think. As opposed to what you think about and why. Enneagram is much more focused on that.
Third, personality tests of any kind are merely tools designed to serve your need to learn about yourself. They cannot define who you are. Resist the temptation to use them that way.
Lastly, remember that the internet is a flawed place to get accurate information about anything, at least until you are experienced and confident in filtering out the crap from the good.

Feel free to msg me if you have questions, I generally don't hold conversations on an open forum. Unless you are more comfortable with that yourself.
Sent from my XT557 using Tapatalk 2


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## TuesdaysChild (Jan 11, 2014)

What ProfessionalINFP says it correct. MBTI is not who you are, it's simply how information is processed through your brain. Sharing the same cognitive functions with someone else can mean that you have things in common, but it doesn't mean you're going to be just alike. Just because someone's description of their personality doesn't sound like yours doesn't make you different MBTI types, and vice versa, just because you identify with someone else's personality traits doesn't mean you're the same MBTI type.

Here's at least a place to start. Forget about "typing" yourself based on other people's descriptions of their personality or because you both like rock music and hate vanilla ice cream. Everybody uses all eight functions, so you're going to have things in common even with MBTI types that are completely opposite from you, and there will be things you don't have in common with people of your own type.

Here's a website that gives a simplified example of the eight functions and what they do. The 8 Cognitive Functions

And even though it's not an in-depth study of MBTI, here's a diagram of each type and the way their functions stack in the order that they are preferred by the user.


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## kittymobile (Dec 3, 2011)

Alli is right in that values can make a huge difference. I live with two other INFPs. One says yes to almost anything and finds it next to impossible to say no. She can be seen as a pushover and is always out, busy and into a variety of things. The other is very solitary and her values are closer to the surface, she is more likely to say no on occasion and explain why.

For me, a very long time ago i found it hard to say no. Now i say no a lot, whenever I feel it's healthy for me to. But i've never been a pushover, I'm not reserved or quiet or shy and I don't fit into most groups. I think a lot of the 'popular qualities' vary based on how mature you are in your type and the degree to which you've developed all your functions. There are many social anxiety and shyness issues on the INFP forum right now that make me roll my eyes in a way because they're spoken about as if they belong to everybody in that type and they certainly don't to me (still sympathise that they're in that situation but it's simply not me). Years ago I found it hard to talk to people I didn't know but then i did some customer service based jobs and went on my gap year alone, forcing me to interact with others or get bored. Now I'm often the most talkative introvert in a room unless I'm socially tapped out. Try to think less on what others say or their opinions on certain types and look more at how a function works and whether it applies to you or not in your own personal analysis.


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## Surreal Snake (Nov 17, 2009)

Be careful you do not absorb into the Typology Herd...It will take your Identity.


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## Belzy (Aug 12, 2013)

You sound like a shy ENFP like I am. I have mistyped myself as INFP as well, and am very anxious by nature.

Just to be sure a few questions: if you are under stress, are you withdrawn/depressed? When you are alone, do you feel quickly lonely, in the need of company within a day or two? When you're alone, does your energy drains a lot (meaning you don't do anything useful, even though you want to)?


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## Euclid (Mar 20, 2014)

Take it with a grain of salt. Or a lot. I don't know if I'm INTP either, my functions are all over the place. It's very subjective. If you don't fit anywhere, just screw MBTI and walk your own way.


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## Boheme (Mar 24, 2014)

For me it's the cognitive functions that confuse things. In every test I've done lately I test INFP but then I read through the descriptions of cognitive function and see that they lead with their feelings, which isn't something I can relate to. Like you I have trouble saying I love you and giving hugs, although I'd very much like to be the kind who can do that. In cognitive function tests I lead with both extraverted and introverted intuition, but it still puts me in INFP, which makes me think the cognitive function aspect of the MBTI is wrong or not very well researched. I found it more helpful to just look at those letters as a continuum and know that I can also be an INTP sometimes because my thinking and feeling sides are very balanced. Enneagreams make more sense, even though they're also not very scientific.


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## whisperycat (Aug 9, 2009)

*Type this*

Type theories like MBTI simply provide a profoundly constrained vocabulary with which it is possible to try to attempt to vaguely almost be able to kind of describe the ways that different people "are". There are billions of people on this planet and all of them "are"; in theory all of them could be "tested" for a personality type. Can you just imagine that? The assumption base on which personality typing is based is colossal. The only people I ever encounter who use personality type in an attempt to understand either themselves or others actually represent only a tiny fraction of humanity, i.e well fed, literate westerners with access to the internet, an education system and money to pay for books or the wisdom of pre-ordained "personality type experts". The indigenous peoples of the jungles, forests, deserts, tundras and plains of this planet also (we assume) have a "type", yet I suspect there are very few "Personality type profiles" that would have any meaning whatsoever to such folk. In summary if you are in the position to have the luxury to ask yourself "Who am I?" without having to worry about your next meal of fending off the next wild animal that wants you to be *its *meal, well, then you have already partially answered your own question. You are a pampered westerner with the luxury of more than enough time to waste on things that aren't just staying alive. In the end it's not about type at all, it's about life.


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## jcatenaci (Mar 28, 2014)

Who_Am_eYe said:


> Okay first of all I got into MBTI types about 3 years ago when one of my teachers gave us the test. I remember I got ENTP and after reading about that personality I knew it wasn't me even though I loved the personality of the ENTP (I also adore ENFP's.. these 2 are my favorite, though I'm sure I'm not one of them and I don't know if I know anyone that is one of those 2 types, but I like going through their threads and seeing videos of them talking about themselves :blushed: ) Anyways, even though I knew I got a wrong type from the first test I still wanted to know about the other types & even though usually personality test are just crap and weren't very dependable I was always interested in them and thought there were fun.
> 
> So when I learnt what each letter meant I changed the letter I thought I got wrong the first time which was the E/I, so that made me a INTP. I read the INTP description and I thought it fitted me much better the ENTP, so I was like I'm definetly an INTP. I also read every other description, but I think that since I already made my mind that I'm an INTP I couldn't really see my self in any of the other personality types. (I hope that made sense :tongue: )
> 
> ...


The saddest thing is I didn't read the whole thing because I believe that brevity is the soul of wit. So you may need to trim that a bit or add TLR to the bottom. Lol! Anyway, I think the problem is that while some people have very easily defined personalities that can fall into one of the 16 types, some of us switch back and forth with our type based upon the questions which are asked. I know I've been typed as ENFP, INFJ, INTP, and most recently INTJ which I found hilarious and decided to advertise. I know that I personally don't favor F or T; same as I don't favor P or J.

So yeah, you're not alone.


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## Nothing1 (Jan 22, 2014)

Who_Am_eYe said:


> Okay first of all I got into MBTI types about 3 years ago when one of my teachers gave us the test. I remember I got ENTP and after reading about that personality I knew it wasn't me even though I loved the personality of the ENTP (I also adore ENFP's.. these 2 are my favorite, though I'm sure I'm not one of them and I don't know if I know anyone that is one of those 2 types, but I like going through their threads and seeing videos of them talking about themselves :blushed: ) Anyways, even though I knew I got a wrong type from the first test I still wanted to know about the other types & even though usually personality test are just crap and weren't very dependable I was always interested in them and thought there were fun.
> 
> So when I learnt what each letter meant I changed the letter I thought I got wrong the first time which was the E/I, so that made me a INTP. I read the INTP description and I thought it fitted me much better the ENTP, so I was like I'm definetly an INTP. I also read every other description, but I think that since I already made my mind that I'm an INTP I couldn't really see my self in any of the other personality types. (I hope that made sense :tongue: )
> 
> ...


Jeezus! Kudos to those who read this in its entirety. 
<----- hella ADD


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## miuliu (Nov 3, 2013)

There is a lot of "general information" that can be applied to most people regardless of type, because MBTI has been butchered by popularity. If you study long enough, you'll be able to find yourself in every single type. Learning MBTI is not about learning every piece of information offered to you. It's about learning to discern bullshit from the factual data and to seek out the root of it all. To find the science behind it. To study Jung.
Until you do, you'll know nothing.


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## Tridentus (Dec 14, 2009)

AlliG said:


> MBTI is not who you are, it's simply how information is processed through your brain.


I don't understand why this isn't mentioned and stressed on every mbti website, blog and book out there. It causes 99% of people who first discover it to have completely the wrong idea of what it is. I mean, it's only the most important thing you need to know about it.

I've been interested in mbti for going on 5 years now. For the first 2 years I had completely the wrong grasp on how it worked, and for the last 3 I've just watched people come on here again and again with the same questions that show no relevance to the parts of psychology that it covers. People who discover it are fed the theory in a certain _incorrect_ way, and then regurgitate this kinda "false wisdom" to other newcomers, and then everyone wonders why they can't get a good handle on how the whole system works. It's no-one's fault, but it just exists as this perpetual cycle which spoils and distracts from the proper purpose and usefulness of it.


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