# Finding your true passion - Has anyone here done it?



## Disperser (Apr 8, 2014)

I'm a soon-to-be graduate with a Bachelors in Mechanical engineering and I have a dilemma. As I'm getting closer to the end, I'm starting to feel like I'm no longer passionate about what I'm studying (victim of The System, societal pressure to conform, etc.). I can barely even concentrate for my remaining exams and I'm having a really hard time grasping anything.

I had two reasons for getting into engineering - one, it promised one of the higher paying careers of all and second, it was partially done with a herd mentality (because all my friends went into engineering). There are other reasons too but these were the more major ones. Thankfully, I chose mechanical which I was partially passionate about as opposed to the other choices I had but that spark has died (is dying). 

So when I think about it, I can only find a few reasons to stay in the field, one of them, thanks to the hippie tree hugger inside me, is by finding a bigger cause I can relate to like environment conservation or something of the sort. Now as a mechanical engineer, these aren't really the kind of careers you get into and even if you want to, there aren't a lot of opportunities that are open.

So I guess I want to know if anyone else here has been in a similar situation and if they have, how did they go about finding their true passion? Was it in a related field? Did you pursue a totally different career? Or worse, did you pursue something like a _childhood dream_?

Please share and thanks in advance.


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## LostFavor (Aug 18, 2011)

I can't offer you a "success story" (yet) but I can give you an idea of my search for a passion.

I graduated about a year ago with a degree in video game design, thinking that I would go program for video games. I quickly realized that not only did my programming skills suck compared to most entry level industry requirements for a game programmer, but my interest in making games was fading the longer I was away from the classroom. 

So I spent the better part of 6 months going from idea to idea, watching all sorts of videos about "finding your passion." I even read some stuff on how my generation is obsessed with finding a passion and how it's sheer folly. I read and watched more than I could begin to remember or link to. 

I went from thinking I would run and monetize a blog, to thinking I would publish a novel, to thinking I would write self-help material. And then in the midst of that last one, in the middle of a standstill (long story short) I was inspired by someone and decided to pursue acting. I realized that acting was something I was always interested in, but I had thought of it as something that "other people do."

But when I put my interest in it into practice and started going to workshops, it was both frightening and exciting. The key difference I found between my interest in acting and my interest in programming is that I had this crazy certainty with programming that I had found "my passion." With acting, I don't even really see it that way; instead of feeling like it's something that is mine and I therefore have to do, I feel like acting is something that I can't not do. 

I still don't have the kind of certainty with it that I did with programming and that's perfectly fine with me because I don't want to shut my ears to seeing how my interests change or develop; I might find, for example, that I'm more compelled to do one kind of acting over another.

There was a question that Scott Dinsmore asked at the end of a video he did for TED: He asked, "What's the work you can't not do?"

At the time I watched that, I thought about it hard and I thought I figured it out, but I hadn't then. I was too focused on being certain and having security. So I would add to his question, what's the work that you both can't not do and would actually pay to be able to do if you had to?






That said, don't get too caught up in the intellectual component of it; you'll probably have to try things out to really know what they do for you.


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## CountessAlyssa (Apr 3, 2014)

College seems to do that, ey? Kills every fiber of passion you ever had at the start. I feel the same way. I just got my bachelors of bio and I've wanted to be a dentist since I was 11 years old. Now that I'm applying for dental schools and studying for my tests I just feel all the passion has drained out of me. My only advice is to keep on going and never forget why you started. Nothing good EVER comes easy and every success story started somewhere. You will find that job if you keep working hard and never give up, I promise.


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## Dao (Sep 13, 2013)

I stayed in college longer than what was required and also made it a point to make my education as diverse as possible. I ultimately ended up discovering an area I loved enough to which to commit, which was somewhat similar to the area I had previously considered. You aren't going to discover your passion unless you try new things, and sadly, what you love isn't necessarily guaranteed to square with what provides security. It's a personal judgement call many people have to make.


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## Disperser (Apr 8, 2014)

That's a very good video @LostFavor, thanks a lot. And very inspiring too.

The thing is, now is a very, _very_ confusing time for me. Like you, I'm trying to juggle a few things at the moment which include everything from freelancing to blogging and game developing. So I can't know for sure what I want (it's easy to say to find the thing I can't not do but I can pretty much can't not do anything - but sleep. I wish I could get paid to sleep). Plus, my college adds to the confusion and to top it off, the mental problems I have been suffering from make it worse to be able to decide anything.

For example, I signed up for Scott Dinsmore's email newsletter and I instantly got the find your passion workbook. It asks me questions like what I've been the most proud of doing in the last year or what makes me happy - things that I cannot possible have answers to. My mind just goes completely blank when I try to answer questions like that.

Thanks anyway to everyone who answered.


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## LostFavor (Aug 18, 2011)

Disperser said:


> That's a very good video @_LostFavor_, thanks a lot. And very inspiring too.
> 
> The thing is, now is a very, _very_ confusing time for me. Like you, I'm trying to juggle a few things at the moment which include everything from freelancing to blogging and game developing. So I can't know for sure what I want (it's easy to say to find the thing I can't not do but I can pretty much can't not do anything - but sleep. I wish I could get paid to sleep). Plus, my college adds to the confusion and to top it off, the mental problems I have been suffering from make it worse to be able to decide anything.
> 
> ...


You're welcome. :happy:

If it makes you feel any better, you have your whole life to figure things out. This video here has helped me put it in perspective numerous times:






(The most important part I remind myself of is that, "No one has their life together," and it really rings true to me. In essence, everyone is dealing with problems in their life in varying degrees, no matter how "together" they appear or how "successful" they look. Or, in other words, you don't have to stress about being the one who gets left in the dust and fails at life because everyone is struggling.)


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## Disperser (Apr 8, 2014)

LostFavor said:


> You're welcome. :happy:
> 
> If it makes you feel any better, you have your whole life to figure things out. This video here has helped me put it in perspective numerous times:
> 
> ...


I used to think about this excessively but this isn't my problem now at all. I'm over it and I've realized the things that the video talks about on my own.

I guess a lot of my problems arise from these stupid beliefs I have like the one where I think that I have to work to have a place/purpose in this world or I'd have to have a *real* job. Also, I want to make a change, even of a minute degree to the country where I live in because everyone else is leaving and migrating to the west (which I've kinda hated ever since I was a child) so I want to work here as opposed to moving to somewhere else. I guess I'll have to get rid of these beliefs first to get anywhere.


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## VioletTru (Jun 24, 2012)

In addition to cosigning the responses made here so far, I also think that it might be helpful to add that you don't necessarily have to focus on finding _a _passion. I mean, wouldn't it be easier if everybody woke up one day and had a revelation along the lines of, "Hey, I know _exactly _what I'm going to do and I know _exactly _how I'm going to get there!" Granted, yes, there are some people who do find their true "calling" and stick with it. But the reality is, not everyone can follow that sort of path. Some, like myself, would probably even find it restricting.

So while it sucks that your "fire" is burning out, especially during the race towards the finish, I'd say just get your degree (easier said than done, I know, but I'm going off on the fact that you claim to be nearing the end) and decide where you want to go from there. You probably know this by now, but there's no linear approach to doing things and there's no time limit for realizing your dreams contrary to what society may impose on us. THAT'S the beauty of self-discovery. THAT's the beauty of possibilities. May not be easy (and I sure as hell know that being that I'm in a similar situation as yourself), but I personally believe it will be worth it if you can find that happy medium between financial security and your interests. 

Also, if you happen to have, or discover that you have, multiple interests and don't necessarily want to specialize in just one for now, you can try to combine those interests and make them work across multiple fields/positions. And if something's "itching" you (a desire to pursue new fields of interest or reignite old ones), then by all means allow yourself to scratch it.

*Oh yes, and please _please _go easy on yourself in regards to your mental health issues and how they may be contributing to your frustration. All the more reason to put more focus on addressing the present before overwhelming yourself with planning a "roadmap" for the future.

Good luck!

~TMPEH


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## LostFavor (Aug 18, 2011)

Disperser said:


> I guess a lot of my problems arise from these stupid beliefs I have like the one where I think that I have to work to have a place/purpose in this world or I'd have to have a *real* job. Also, I want to make a change, even of a minute degree to the country where I live in because everyone else is leaving and migrating to the west (which I've kinda hated ever since I was a child) so I want to work here as opposed to moving to somewhere else. I guess I'll have to get rid of these beliefs first to get anywhere.


I hear you. Ever since I told anyone about my intentions to pursue acting, I've been getting the subtle (and occasionally not-so-subtle) comments about when I'm going to get a job and how I'm going to pay for things. The "real job" adage just stems, I think, from the difference between getting a job that is more-or-less stable and getting a job that is highly variable. Ultimately, parents, friends, etc., just don't want you to be out on the street. Or, in some cases, it might have to do with pride and wanting to be able to say that you're an "XYZ prestigious profession."

But I think if you come across things you want to do that really get your burning, any care you have about that notion will suddenly seem a lot less important.

Anyway, like @TMPEH said, go easy on yourself. All problems are easier to solve when you have a rested, healthy mind and body.


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