# Is it ever possible for someones instinct stacking order to change?



## hip priest1 (Jan 11, 2015)

Can someone go from e.g. sp/so to sp/sx? Or so/sp to sp/so? Maybe as a result of life changing experience, or change in lifestyle/habits. I'm more interested in whether the second instinct can swap with the third, e.g. sx/so changing to sx/sp or vice versa.

Has anyone experienced anything like this, observed it in yourself or in others?


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## enneathusiast (Dec 15, 2012)

IME, an individual's stacking most often changes because they don't have a strong understanding of how it works. It's not so much that they're stacking actually changes but what it means to them changes and they decide on a different stacking. The problem is that there is no absolute definition of instinctual stacking - each person has their own understanding or interpretation not only of stacking but also of what each instinct is and the stacking they identify with tends to change as their understanding changes.

Instinctual stacking for me doesn't change because it's directly tied to type. For example, my dominant type is not simply type 5 but sx/sp 5. I wouldn't simply change to sp/so 5 because that's not where type 5 developed for me. However, I may at times shift to sp/so 8 because that's where type 8 tends to operate for me.


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## o0india0o (Mar 17, 2015)

I'm going to say "yes". But I don't know how common or uncommon it is.

My husband (a Type 9), who is likely SP/SX or SX/SP;; decided he did not like being an outcast when he was younger, and somehow tapped into the SO-instinct. His family was heavily SO-dom centered, and thus might have helped him mimic some of the SO-dom tendencies. He doesn't seem to have a true understanding and/or mastery of the SO-dom "skill set" as true SO-dom first's I know, but I think he really focused in on his connection to Type 3 - - and that helped him tap into a lot of those SO traits, and he actually embodied a very SO-first persona for a couple years (until he decided it was not for him).

I'm not sure if certain types are better at this than others, or if we all have the ability to develop all three instincts. However, my husband has a clear few years where he *strongly* shifted his focus from SP needs, to an SO-dom focus. It's odd, and I've pondered it. As I mentioned before, I'm sure it helped that his family is largely SO-dom.

Something like that has never happened to me (SX/SP) - - although, once, when our financial and physical security was threatened for a few years, I think I became a bit more SP centered out of the need for survival. But after that got shored up, the SX instinct returned front and center.


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## Figure (Jun 22, 2011)

The way I see this is, you depend on all three instincts, and all three are funnels through which your core enneagram type run through. One instinct (the primary instinct) is the funnel of funnels, and the instinct by which your core type most frequently runs through by default. From there, some people may either use their second instinct frequently too and overlook their third, and others may not use the other two much at all. 

Either way, the "stackings" are just a model to show which one is the biggest influence on your type, and which is next biggest, _overall_. Your primary instinct should not, in my opinion, ever change in how frequently you depend on it - however, you may situationally depend on other instincts outside of the primary if needs in that area crop up. 

If you are, for example, a Social/Sexual 6 - by and large, you will behave like a social 6 in most situations by default. You may have a 6 So/Sx with close So-Sx who will also act Sx 6-ish quite frequently, and another So/Sx 6 who only occasionally uses Sx. In both cases, they are Social 6's with So/Sx stacking, and that won't change category-wise. Either of these two people would rely on Sp-6 if their Self Preservation is threatened in some way, but that doesn't make them 6 So/Sp as their type. They would still be 6 So/Sx, situationally using the Sp instinct. 

I think the second instinct is only useful for people who switch frequently between their first and second. You don't, however, need to identify with having a strong second instinct at all.


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## hip priest1 (Jan 11, 2015)

Thanks for the advice guys. I've had a recent experience recently where it feels like I am able to switch from my original typing of SX/SP to SX/SO, and back again. Its like I am a slightly different person. I've switched to and from a few times and I'm starting to think this is not normal. It sounds crazy, I know. Has anyone experienced or observed anything like this?


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## Axe (Aug 1, 2014)

afaik in normal type theory stacking tends to change when one is finding a mate... i can't remember how it changes... but in different settings people can switch to different gears.. but you still stick with your primary type - it's just a manifestion of the way you're wired coming out in a different way when in a different setting.


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## Axe (Aug 1, 2014)

hip priest1 said:


> Thanks for the advice guys. I've had a recent experience recently where it feels like I am able to switch from my original typing of SX/SP to SX/SO, and back again. Its like I am a slightly different person. I've switched to and from a few times and I'm starting to think this is not normal. It sounds crazy, I know. Has anyone experienced or observed anything like this?


fwiw people seem to think i'm sp/sx or sx/sp ... and i can be pretty on-off socially.. 

like if i have some reason to be social.. sometimes i can be pretty social.. but i'm not into the whole group thing etc.. and i tend to pay attention to one person at a time but switch attention... 

but i get overloaded if i try and maintain social networks or some such, which stronger so's seem to find much easier or harder... that is it can be hard because they care so much.. or easy because they do it so much.


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## drmiller100 (Dec 3, 2011)

hip priest1 said:


> Thanks for the advice guys. I've had a recent experience recently where it feels like I am able to switch from my original typing of SX/SP to SX/SO, and back again. Its like I am a slightly different person. I've switched to and from a few times and I'm starting to think this is not normal. It sounds crazy, I know. Has anyone experienced or observed anything like this?


enneagram theory talks about evolution/devolution when you are stressed or growing in the base numbers. Are you maybe tranitioning between two numbers and working on different outlooks in that way?


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## charlie.elliot (Jan 22, 2014)

I dont know if its possible to change, but I sure would like to. I think. Well, not really completely change, but..... As a social instinct, my primary focus is how well I'm getting along with others, and it seems like being a SP-instinct would help me in that regard... because SP-doms seem less self-conscious, more willing to be themselves with all their quirks, all the crappy social stuff just flies over their head, they seem more steady/solid, not subject to change on a whim... basically I wish I could take on SP-characteristics to satisfy my Social needs.


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## galactic collision (May 1, 2014)

No, it is not possible for instinct stacking order to change. It is only possible for your understanding and use of the instincts to grow.


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## sexylexy (Jun 25, 2015)

Axe said:


> afaik in normal type theory stacking tends to change when one is finding a mate... i can't remember how it changes... but in different settings people can switch to different gears.. but you still stick with your primary type - it's just a manifestion of the way you're wired coming out in a different way when in a different setting.


Enneagram Instinctual Subtype and Pair Bonding

Interrelationship of Instinctual Drives

A noteworthy point of interest with respect to the Enneagram Instinctual Subtypes is that the dominant instinctual drive (self-preserving, social or sexual) will shift to the other two subtypes as needed to ensure its influential role in this trialectic instinctual system. The way in which the dominant subtype employs the other two appears to be very specific and predictable. The dominant drive maintains the role of the commander in chief and the other two are channeled through its lens. Generally, this is very primal and often unconscious. This is especially apparent with respect to the human drive to seek a mate and pair bonding, but applies to all areas of life. If a relationship displays conflicting instinctual needs the dominant drive perceives it as a threat to security and acts accordingly. Confusion about the manner in which the instinctual drives manifest to create and maintain a sense of security is often the root of misunderstandings. Such disturbances in the instinctual drive are often the catalyst for seeking counsel or therapy.

Self-preserving moves to Sexual For example, the self preserving subtype considers a mate as an essential need to maintain and insure security. Therefore, when in search of a mate the self-preserving subtype will feel anxiety and suspense until a mate is secured. In order to attract a mate, the self-preserving subtype will shift to their respective sexual instinctual drive to accommodate this fear. Outwardly the self-preserving subtype will behave like the sexual subtype, pay more attention to their desirability and will be sensual or flirtatious. At first, the self-preserving subtype will spend more time one on more with the possible mate. Once the mate is secured, the self-preserving subtype will return to basic routines that ideally would include the mate. An area of pain and disappointment for this subtype is when they have a mate that is unwilling to pay attention to issues of security and disrupt their need for inner calm.

Social moves to Self-PreservingThe social subtype will think in terms more indicative of the self-preserving subtype when selecting a mate. This is very important to insure the desired security that rank and social status can provide. The social subtype seeks a mate with a shared social vision and similar values. This is necessary to fulfill the desire for a mate that will join them in their activities. Therefore, a secure social position is essential. Much attention is paid to the potential mate?s connections, rank and ability to provide financial security. This subtype enjoys bringing others together, feeling that ?the more the merrier?. They are often adept at creating the center stage and often use their home for social events, gatherings and causes. At first the social subtype will spend more time one on one with the potential mate. Once the mate is in place, the social subtype will return to outside interests, groups and/or activities, ideally, this is with their mate. An area of pain and disappointment for this subtype is when they have a mate that is unwilling to pay attention to their need for people, activities, causes and unwilling to share their interest in others.

Sexual moves to Social The sexual subtype (one on one) will seek the greater world or social arena to find a desired mate. The sexual subtype is normally happy tucked away in a secluded setting with one significant other. However, when alone or in search of a mate, this subtype will behave much more like the social subtype. One must be with others to find ?the other?. Once the mate is selected, the social activity will be replaced by the dominant drive for time spent in union with the other one on one. At first the sexual subtype may spend time with the potential mate in the company of others. They become a pair even in groups. Then when the passion for deeper connection is ignited the sexual subtype will want to bond totally with their desired other. When the mate is determined, the sexual subtype will return to one on one style of relating. Ideally, this is intense time spent with the desired other or mate. An area of pain and disappointment for this subtype is when they have a mate that is unwilling to pay attention to their degree of connection and intimately share their deepest and innermost thoughts.

?1996 Katherine Chernick-Fauvre


I can't post the link.


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## Blindspots (Jan 27, 2014)

The way I see it, the instinctual stacking just _seems_ to change in order for one to adapt to different situations.

In med school, I used to be alone on-duty and wasn't allowed to even step outside of the hospital, so I often needed to ask classmates to bring supplies in short notice. And in return, I was expected to be ready to do the same.

I type as sp-first. By nature, I'm most conscious of the conditions and the materials I need to feel sane. And I typically don't need much regard and fluidity within the social realm, so I don't invest much energy on so-type activities. But when I need something to help me stay healthy and sane, sp-needs, which could only be obtained through dealing with other people, I comply. 

I'd describe this process as using social subtype strategies in subservience to sp-ends. Adaptation, rather than saying my instinctual tendencies have changed.

This may just be my case, though. It may be possible that someone's instincts can change drastically after major life events, though I couldn't verify it myself.


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## drmiller100 (Dec 3, 2011)

sexylexy said:


> Enneagram Instinctual Subtype and Pair Bonding
> 
> Interrelationship of Instinctual Drives
> 
> ...



HOLY SHIT. This is so fucking me. And my ex wife. I'm Sx. She is Sp. She was fucking hot, and fun, and intense, and great. then wedding cake, and she turned into a nag worried about her life savings account and having a bigger house and keeping up with appearances and sex cut back. God I was disappointed, but I drank a lot so it worked out.

So, I'm social when I want to find a new GF. And once I find a GF, Not so much social any more.


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## enneathusiast (Dec 15, 2012)

Thymic said:


> I'd describe this process as using social subtype strategies in subservience to sp-ends. Adaptation, rather than saying my instinctual tendencies have changed.


Just curious, do you identify with the sp/so stacking. I'm asking because it seems that the 2nd instinct is often in service of the 1st and I'm wondering if what you're saying may be another example of that.


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## Blindspots (Jan 27, 2014)

enneathusiast said:


> Just curious, do you identify with the sp/so stacking. I'm asking because it seems that the 2nd instinct is often in service of the 1st and I'm wondering if what you're saying may be another example of that.


It does say that among the instinctual stacking resources. I identify more with sp/sx, though.

The way I experience it, the blindspot becomes less "blind" when I realize its domain intersects with that of the my first instinct. And in my case, it might be a type 1 thing to be conscientious, if not fully competent, with the realms of all three instincts. 

So even if I really struggle with networking, maintaining complex connections with people and groups and keeping up with the whatever the social milieu looks like at the moment, I'd do it if the resources I value most (space and time to think through things and take care of my sanity) relied on it, like that time I spent working in the hospital.


Meanwhile, the second instinct seemed to wander off somewhere, waving at me from time to time, content with waiting until I'm ready to immerse myself in it. Maybe it also has to do with my core type, and because it didn't seem as urgent at the time I was in the hospital, I could put it aside for a while and focus on what's at hand.

If given enough resources for me to feel safe and sane, and I feel like I've covered whatever I'm responsible for, I'd feel secure enough to pursue activities and topics I get absorbed in for hours on end, or ideas or people (on the few occasions I'm inclined to do so, being socially introverted) I want to get to know on a much deeper level.




As you could see, there are a lot of factors that may confound with each other. I may have to think this through a bit more, whether I'm interpreting my blindspot and not-so-blindspot accurately.


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