# Fi-Ne or Si-Te?



## Thalassa (Jun 10, 2010)

LiquidLight said:


> You sound sorta ISFP, if you actually need to make what you value tangible. (INFPs are kinda happy to just let stuff hang out there and cry over it LOL). Se (and sometimes Te but especially both together) promotes people to actually do something or make something.


Weird, I thought the SAME THING...but because of the split second thought that the OP was using Ni...but not in a dom way...

I also agree about your distinction between NFP and SFP...I don't mean to insult NFPs by saying they just let things be and cry about it, but like, I've always thought it was best to DO SOMETHING about something that was wrong, unless it was smarter to adjust and lay low for tactical reasons, which of course is an option too.

I've always thought in terms of what can I do to get out of this situation right now, or as I grew older (and got more Te) reflecting on which tactics were important to apply to my "doing" (or not doing!)

My ENFP friend, on the other hand...I remember when we were in our early twenties, like ...for lack of a better word...putting my foot up her ass because I felt like she was "wallowing." Don't get me wrong...I wallow too, and cry, and feel sorry for myself, and retreat...I engage in these behaviors too....but I "snap out it" quicker and get to doing. If I don't "do" I feel bad about myself, is the only way I can put it. This was in a specific situation, too, where she really did need to do something, and I noticed that she would retreat for much longer stretches than I would, though I engage in a similar behavior, it would always last a shorter period of time before I felt a violent urge to move forward in the tangible world.

She and I are really intellectually similar, and we really enjoyed discussions with one another, but like, I was the big doer and "tougher talking" one when it came down to brass tacks, while she had more ...hmmm...she simply has more tact and diplomacy skills than me, she lays on the charm with people, which I can do, just not as well...and vice versa. So this is the difference between Fi paired with Ne and Fi paired with Se in my personal, IRL experience.

I also read somewhere that INFPs are "deeper listeners" than ISFPs, while ISFP will listen for a shorter period of time before wanting/needing to respond or do. 



> The whole being detached from the world sounds like strong Fi. (the only other types that report this kind of stuff are inferior-Fe types like ISTP and INTP but this is more of a snarky "fuck people, they all suck" kinda thing because they can't figure out how to fit in, rather than knowing they're just inherently different.


I was considering the possibility that the OP is in an Fi/Ni loop instead of an Fi/Si loop.


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## Modesty (Aug 30, 2011)

fourtines said:


> Weird, I thought the SAME THING...but because of the split second thought that the OP was using Ni...but not in a dom way...
> 
> I also agree about your distinction between NFP and SFP...I don't mean to insult NFPs by saying they just let things be and cry about it, but like, I've always thought it was best to DO SOMETHING about something that was wrong, unless it was smarter to adjust and lay low for tactical reasons, which of course is an option too.
> 
> ...


Well I keep having this recurring thought that this especially beautiful girl is an idol for some stuff that has to go down in my emotional life. I can't really get that out of my head for five seconds.

But seriously, I don't know if I'm coming across as whiny at this point (;D) but I need the MBTI to feel legit and have reasons if I'm to assume it.

What are your reasons? Reasons. Reasons!


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## Thalassa (Jun 10, 2010)

Modesty said:


> Well I keep having this recurring thought that this especially beautiful girl is an idol for some stuff that has to go down in my emotional life. I can't really get that out of my head for five seconds.
> 
> But seriously, I don't know if I'm coming across as whiny at this point (;D) but I need the MBTI to feel legit and have reasons if I'm to assume it.
> 
> What are your reasons? Reasons. Reasons!


Read what I wrote and see if you see any of yourself in it. I agreed with @LiquidLight that you may be more of a tangible doer, or Se type, and that I got this flash of Ni myself reading your post, and felt that you were using Ni, and I can't quite put it into words, it's like you're shifting the context of YOURSELF like...Fi/Ni.

I never said you seemed whiny. I don't even know you, so please don't take anything I said as directed at you, it's just a trait that Fi types can have while in retreat mode, to be self-pitying or self-absorbed, but it's a crucial part of our rational Fi analysis to understand ourselves firstly, and then to attempt to uncover internal ethics or even universal ethics. 

I think @LiquidLight may have meant that NFPs are content to be in this state for a longer period of time, while the SFP may very well want to DO something tangible about it, even if "doing something" means talking or writing...like I tend to think that doing nothing is a coward's way out and it frustrates me, and I think this may be an Fi/Se value combined with my Enneagram 6 reactivity. I think I've come so much at some people on certain web sites as "doing" that I even seem Se dom at times. 

On the other hand, ISFP in Fi/Ni can get into "analysis paralysis" ...which is a state I've gone into a lot, I think, and it results in a lot of internal sudden "insights" into what I think other people mean, or what different Fi values really mean to me and why...but I will feel bad about myself if I don't DO. Se is crucial to my self-esteem I think, and for a long time I didn't see it, though it was there all along and I've always been that way, even in my teens. I just didn't see it. Se is the crucial component to get me from being depressed, stagnating, or feeling bad about myself...where as I guess the NFP doesn't have this core need to "do" so much if it's not necessary...I also tend to want to experience things for myself, especially when I was younger, it was like actually experiencing things myself was so fundamentally important to me. 

Do you relate to any of that? Or do you think you're more like an NFP, consistently over the course of life?

If you really believe that you're an ISTJ you may have to tell us more about yourself, and why.


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## myexplodingcat (Feb 6, 2011)

Modesty said:


> No I can't simply explain my psychology. I was referring to Fi in the third degree because I really don't understand this at all. Sorry to be blunt I'm stressed as fuck.


It is very difficult to type someone while they're depressed.

What we need to know is if there are any paradoxes in your life. We need to see as many as we can. You can rant about them if you want, we'll listen.

There's also the possibility that you aren't in a dom-tert loop and you have a different issue, in which case this is beyond my expertise (although I can't speak for LiquidLight). If that's what's happening, you might be depressed for a different reason than pressure from the inferior. 

I would recommend trying to get advice from the Enneagram folks on your Enneatype and your depression. I'm not sure how accurate the Ennea system is, but they would at least have a fresh take on things and would approach from a different angle. That is not to say we're giving up on you! Stick around.

Furthermore, I would also recommend looking around the MBTI type forums. Maybe you could get advice from the ISFPs.

I think that your first priority needs to be getting over this depression. Although finding your type would probably help, it's very difficult to do right now.

One more piece of advice.

Flip your mattress. Make sure you're getting a good night's sleep. Check for sleep apnea--I hear it's an affordable test and it will save you a lot of grief. Nothing makes depression worse than not getting enough quality sleep.

Speaking of which, it's 11:40 at night here. This is the captain, signing off.

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## Modesty (Aug 30, 2011)

I'll come back when I haven't been depressed for several months.


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