# Being Direct/ Blunt/ Straightforward



## Dylio (Jul 4, 2011)

Would you say that your very direct and to the point, or do you "beat around the bush" to end up where you want to go. 

Since I've started my career I've had to hone my "straight forwardness" and try my hardest not to come off as wishy washy. I'm now confrontational and will tell you to your face if i feel something is wrong. Am I a dick? Maybe.

I used to be afraid of how people would react if I asked certain things, my boss would call it the "fear bubble." I would be indirect in my approaches, but now I have no problem with being straight up and to the point.


Do direct/blunt people make you uncomfortable, or is the opposite more true? Are you indirect, or direct in how you approach people?


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## voicetrocity (Mar 31, 2012)

I'm pretty freaking direct (or so I've been told); nothing drives me bonkers quicker than passive aggressiveness. 
I appreciate (and even expect to some degree) for others to be direct with me as well; it's quite disappointing to me when someone proves themselves to be otherwise.


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## Joseph (Jun 20, 2012)

I'm getting more direct in telling people things, it's something I've really struggled to do for awhile. Getting better at it though. I'm pretty indirect in asking people things or telling them stuff, unless they specifically ask me how I'm feeling. 

The only times I'm really blunt is when I'm personally offended by something (bigotry, stealing, etc) or defending a innocent/friend/family. Those are snap-reactions and usually too harsh


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## staticmud (Jun 28, 2012)

I am highly direct, assertive, and blunt. I don't beat around the bush with anything. I just say it how it is. A lot of people find it to be very abrasive and would rather I sugar coat everything for them or say things indirectly, but it's never been my style. People tell me that I'm too blunt, harsh, or rude, but I don't ever see it. I'm just being straightforward and honest.

I prefer people to be the same way with me. I always end up commanding them to "get to the point."


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## wisterias (Jul 15, 2012)

Straightforward, but I'm always careful to word it politely.

I'm not naturally comfortable talking with someone who's totally blunt/direct, but from experience, after a conversation or two I can mirror their assertiveness and it works out.


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## Diphenhydramine (Apr 9, 2010)

I know when to be direct and when not to be. If you want to get something from people, you have to know their kind of personality -- some people its best to be direct, others you have to be really indirect. Though I am a person, as a personality, am direct and blunt.


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## The Waverider (Mar 20, 2012)

I'm blunt and straight to the point. 
I don't care about how you're gonna react, how is it going to change the situation other than me being beat up or something?

Although, I can be tactful and avoid trying to hurt your feelings, but then you'll stay ignorant about what really happened...but ignorance is bliss


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## ilphithra (Jun 22, 2010)

Direct, blunt, straightforward... you name it. And I honestly don't care about how people react. 
If someone asks me what I think of their dress, I will say it.. even if the dress looks like clownwear. Don't like what I said? Well, tough. 

If I start talking "nice" (aka, being indirect, pussy-footing), it's because I'm getting irritated by the person I'm talking to and I proceed to go into heavy sarcasm mode.

My problem are all the little "glasses" going about that get offended by bluntness and go out crying "mommy" right away. Grow a pair, people... I hate ninnies.

Oh... and PC? No, thanks.


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## Masked_Fragments (Apr 13, 2012)

Am I blunt on outside? Sorta, but it depends on how organized my thoughts are before I can give a reply, so I think the easiest answer in the long run is yes.

My siblings are very passive/indirect so I rush them to get to the point, and they do.

If I do actually hurt someone and it becomes known to me, I guess I'll try to tone down a bit. Everyone's different I guess.


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## WickedQueen (Jun 1, 2009)

My former boss call me "Snake Lady". Aside from the fact that I always wear a golden snake ring on my left index finger, I was well known for being direct, tactless, and harsh with my wordings.

Some PerC members have called me: "Scorpion", "Stabbing Knife", "anti-NF bulshittery", "sharp breeze", "Queen of Te-dom", "No Bullshit Bastion", and of course... "Bitch".


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## Misha (Dec 18, 2011)

First put yourself in this situation: Someone was being blunt to you about you being blunt to others.

And try to imagine how you might feel. Apparently it didn't sit too well with you, did it?

It is one thing to be truthful and honest, and another thing to be blunt about it. You need to learn the fine art of eloquence mixed with compassion. You also need to learn discernment: there is a time to be blunt and to the point, and a time to hold back or word it carefully.

Ask yourself this question: what is your intention in saying whatever you want to say whenever and however you want to say it? Think about how it's going to land on the hearer's ears and how they are going to interpret it. I am not talking about being _politically correct_. If anything, you want to provoke thought, _not _just provoke.

Anybody can be a know-it-all by being blunt; however it takes intelligence, discernment, and a degree of kindness and class to communicate effectively.


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## Bear987 (May 13, 2012)

My father slapped most of the straightforwardness out of me when I was younger. As a result, directness or bluntness scares me a little; it makes me feel uncomfortable. I am no more shy or insecure as the next guy, however.

When dealing with others, I tend to ease people into things. Not knowing what I really want half the time, also doesn't help.


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## Raichan (Jul 15, 2010)

Actually I am of opinion that one can get to the point without being 'blunt' in that 'harsh' connotative sense people usually attach to the term.

It's not always a question about being direct or indirect, it's more so about *awareness.*

For example if a stranger comes to me and asks,''so what do you think of my outfit/make up?'' I can simply just say the truth,''Well sorry that's not really my taste.'' Easier, to the point, direct - that's the truth, honey. Do I have to say,'' Ouch, you look like an ass, sorry''? No. Why? It's not because I'm being wishy-washy. It's because what makes me think that I am so high and above that I can make a comment about a preference of someone who's not even acquainted with me?


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## MirrorSmile (May 26, 2011)

It really depends on the person and the situation. Generally, I only beat half the bush before going straight to the point. You can be direct and still have tact. The 'beating around the bush' is usually for build-up, just so the person knows where I'm coming from/doesn't think I suddenly got off-tangent. This doesn't take that much time though.


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## Foibleful (Oct 2, 2012)

My natural tendency is to beat around the bush because I am afraid of hurting someone's feelings. I'm learning to overcome that and say what needs to be said, clearly and directly. However, I think there's a big difference between communicating directly and being rude. Since we live in a world populated by other humans, I think the art of diplomacy is essential. Why would I say something in a hurtful way if the rearrangement of a few words could avoid that?


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## DiamondDays (Sep 4, 2012)

I try to always talk to people on their level. Not because i care overly much about hurting most peoples feelings ( i don't ) but because it's the best and probably only way to actually communicate with anybody. If i really don't care what happens or if i'm just really pissed i'll be as blunt as can be but otherwise i'll just adjust to the situation. 

I guess to me communication is a means to an end. It's useless to be blunt if it won't accomplish anything so in those cases i rather don't be. In any given work or college related matter my approach usually results in everybody doing as i suggested without even knowing it's not their own idea.

That being said i prefer my friends to be people who can take at least some degree of straightforwardness.


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## Chris Tchaikovsky (Oct 6, 2012)

I think generally people already suspect you're " beating around the bush " and find it more annoying for no more reason other than because you're trying not to be. So yeah, it's better to be straightforward. Polite, but firm.


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