# Skinny Talk



## scarygirl (Aug 12, 2010)

Let people like what they like. Whether it be skinny girls or large sized women. Or men. It doesn't matter.


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## uncreative_name (Sep 24, 2010)

I haven't read through the whole thread, but I find too skinny or trying to be too skinny to not be attractive. There's a big difference between being healthy and exercising and obsessive dieting (not even necessarily eating disorder territory). 

What's too skinny? Usually you just know. You can tell when a girl is naturally on the thin side because that is her build and when a girl is pushing it. I prefer healthy. Which eliminates extremes on both ends.


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## Jwing24 (Aug 2, 2010)

Fizz said:


> Goodness, I completely forgot about men in this issue. Thank you Jwing24. I've actually talked to a friend of mine who is very slender and tall, I'd say about 5'11" and I'm unsure about his weight in pounds. We were talking about our ideal types and got onto the subject of stature/build. He mentioned that being a slender guy can be a curse. He feels like most women prefer men who are bulkier, either heavy in muscle and/or fat. I had never really thought about it, but men too have their own insecurities.
> 
> I have a few male friends that have the tall, slender/skinny body type and only one has voiced his concern about his appearance and appeal. It seems that men aren't encouraged to voice their insecurities about their body. Except for one thing, but we won't get into that :blushed:


In my experience it seems women have more specific preferences about a man's height than his weight. It seems many want to be a bit shorter and some want to be (I never understood this) a LOT shorter. Whereas with weight it seems to me to be just like you said they mind less if a guy is a little chubby than if he is skinny. 

That being said, I fall into it a bit with height too. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel self conscious if I were to go out with a girl who was noticeably taller than me (like 3+ inches taller than me). But that's probably b/c I'm not the most confident guy anyway.


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

Jwing24 said:


> In my experience it seems women have more specific preferences about a man's height than his weight. It seems many want to be a bit shorter and some want to be (I never understood this) a LOT shorter. Whereas with weight it seems to me to be just like you said they mind less if a guy is a little chubby than if he is skinny.
> 
> That being said, I fall into it a bit with height too. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel self conscious if I were to go out with a girl who was noticeably taller than me (like 3+ inches taller than me). But that's probably b/c I'm not the most confident guy anyway.


This reminds me of a wakeup call I had a while back. I was out hiking with a friend of mine, and I was feeling upset about the size discrimination I had been facing online. He asked me how I was doing, and I couldn't hold back the sound of crying from my voice. I didn't want to talk about it, for fear he would be just like the others, but he could tell something was bothering me. I had to admit that I wasn't okay. When he asked what was wrong, I said, "You wouldn't understand, because you are a man who has never had to deal with it." I am not usually so bold, for fear of being a sexist, but I was feeling really hurt.

He said, "Try me. You might be surprised" So I eventually told him I was upset about size-ism, describing the details of the offenses against me. I told him about the thread where everyone was listing what they wanted in a mate, where they said they didn't care about looks, but always tagged on a few words that essentially meant "...as long as she doesn't look like you." I didn't even mention the thread where most of the men said they would rather have sex with a corpse than with someone who looked like me. I didn't have to. He got my point, and he said, "Just look at me. You don't think I understand?" I hadn't even noticed that he was short until he drew my attention to it. He mentioned meeting girls online, ones who seemed compatible with him in nearly ever way, who were interested in him only until they found out his height. He mentioned that he had even tried lying about his height on dating sites because if he didn't, his results would show that he had no matches. This was because all of the women who were typing in what they wanted seemed to prefer men over 5'8". He is only 5'5". He explained how size-discrimination affected everyone, regardless of gender, just in different ways, and knowing about the unfair treatment he had received for his size only reawakened my passion to fight all forms of discrimination. Instead of feeling sad for myself, I felt angry for the world.


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

Jwing24 said:


> In my experience it seems women have more specific preferences about a man's height than his weight. It seems many want to be a bit shorter and some want to be (I never understood this) a LOT shorter. Whereas with weight it seems to me to be just like you said they mind less if a guy is a little chubby than if he is skinny.
> 
> That being said, I fall into it a bit with height too. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel self conscious if I were to go out with a girl who was noticeably taller than me (like 3+ inches taller than me). But that's probably b/c I'm not the most confident guy anyway.


That too, that seems to be a bigger problem than body type. I understand that people have no control over how tall they are (unless they have elective surgery). I also understand that it does make some women feel safer or more feminine with a much taller man. I'm 5'3", if they're taller than me, cool. I don't have a list with, "Only above 5'10" with washboard abs" because that's not what I want anyway.




snail said:


> He got my point, and he said, "Just look at me. You don't think I understand?" I hadn't even noticed that he was short until he drew my attention to it. He mentioned meeting girls online, ones who seemed compatible with him in nearly ever way, who were interested in him only until they found out his height. He mentioned that he had even tried lying about his height on dating sites because if he didn't, his results would show that he had no matches. This was because all of the women who were typing in what they wanted seemed to prefer men over 5'8". He is only 5'5". He explained how size-discrimination affected everyone, regardless of gender, just in different ways, and knowing about the unfair treatment he had received for his size only reawakened my passion to fight all forms of discrimination. Instead of feeling sad for myself, I felt angry for the world.


I won't point fingers but I do know someone who will not date a man under 5'10". FIVE FOOT TEN. Given that she is 5'6" and wears heels. I think she is incredibly picky and it explains why she is still single in her early thirties looking for a husband. On top of that she has many other unrealistic expectations of a partner. I know many men are automatically looked over based on their height, it's sad.


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## Mutatio NOmenis (Jun 22, 2009)

I'd rather not see anorexic skinny. As a general guideline, thin is attractive so long as i can't see bones I shouldn't be seeing such as the upper ribs, the pelvis, the vertebrae, and the sternum.


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

I seriously doubt you have to worry about prejudice if you're skinny, unless perhaps you live in a very small and backward neighborhood in the South-East. I have lived in said neighborhood, and I still find that people admire my body.

That being said, I would like to say that I am not very attracted to skinny men. Even the ones that are average leaning toward slender just seem a bit tiny to me. I'm average height for a woman and well below average weight, and when I try to cuddle with a slender guy it's like twig-on-twig action. xP I need a little something to hold at night, not something to poke me in the ribs. I'm not huge on the 'rock hard abs' thing either... a nice shape is appreciated, but what about the phrase 'rock hard' sounds enjoyable? And don't start on the whole "oo that's how I like my dicks" because it's still got some give around the outside and you know it.

... yep...


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## Sina (Oct 27, 2010)

@hziegel: Girl, you crack me up! That's an amusing post ("twig-on-twig action" :crazy.


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

hziegel said:


> I'm average height for a woman and well below average weight, and when I try to cuddle with a slender guy it's like *twig-on-twig action*. xP I need a little something to hold at night, not something to poke me in the ribs.


If you rub together fast enough you can start a fire.


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## gretalbear (Jan 26, 2011)

i think girls are beautiful when they look happy.


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## Mutatio NOmenis (Jun 22, 2009)

gretalbear said:


> i think girls are beautiful when they look happy.


Well said, miss.


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## momidoll (Mar 1, 2010)

There is no such thing as the perfect size because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I know that is one of the most overused cliche's, but it's true. For a long time, I used to have body image issues because many people around me would try to make me think that something was wrong with me because I've always been very petite. I tried to gain weight many times in my life until one day I said "fuck it", I am who I am and screw anybody that doesn't like me just the way I am. I accepted the fact that I'm small, and I stopped trying to go against the grain. I feel so much better now that I stopped trying to force myself to become a so called perfect size.

Anyways, my point to the OP is that there will always be preferences in the world and so called standards of beauty, but anyone that's worth your time will love and appreciate you just as you are regardless of whether or not you fit what the current standard of beauty is in society.


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

I actually have what is considered the modern 'ideal beauty' as far as measurements, which is a rare line to hit. And yet I was raised in Virginia, where the more classic ideals are still appreciated (large breasts, wide hips and a curved stomach). I was actually mocked, teased and humiliated by both girls and boys for being skinny, even though most of the US would consider me very desirable. I would say that the majority of my school thought I was unattractive. There is no universal ideals of beauty, only a combination of hormonal instinct and superficial ideals we experience through the media. Naturally, I feel that hormone levels have more to do with attraction than any other physical characteristic. I have high estrogen levels and am very instinctively attracted to men with high testosterone levels or who put off particularly strong pheromones. Beyond that it's just personal preference.


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## Monte (Feb 17, 2010)

Well... this got interesting.


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## Aßbiscuits (Oct 8, 2009)

gretalbear said:


> i think girls are beautiful when they look happy.












Me too :3.


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## Neon Knight (Aug 11, 2010)

momidoll said:


> There is no such thing as the perfect size because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I know that is one of the most overused cliche's, but it's true. For a long time, I used to have body image issues because many people around me would try to make me think that something was wrong with me because I've always been very petite. I tried to gain weight many times in my life until one day I said "fuck it", I am who I am and screw anybody that doesn't like me just the way I am. I accepted the fact that I'm small, and I stopped trying to go against the grain. I feel so much better now that I stopped trying to force myself to become a so called perfect size.
> 
> Anyways, my point to the OP is that there will always be preferences in the world and so called standards of beauty, but anyone that's worth your time will love and appreciate you just as you are regardless of whether or not you fit what the current standard of beauty is in society.


That's so irritating isn't it? I have decided to give up too, at least for now, but the reason I want to gain is for my health, not because of some superficial bitches/assholes. This is one of my favourite posts in here , just thought I'd mention that.


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## momidoll (Mar 1, 2010)

SuPERNaUT said:


> That's so irritating isn't it? I have decided to give up too, at least for now, but the reason I want to gain is for my health, not because of some superficial bitches/assholes. This is one of my favourite posts in here , just thought I'd mention that.


Thanks, I posted in here to try to help encourage everyone else that deals with this issue. I understand where you're coming from because I've been in the same predicament as you. There were a couple of times in my life where I wanted to gain for my health as well. I hope everything works out for you.


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

momidoll said:


> Thanks, I posted in here to try to help encourage everyone else that deals with this issue. I understand where you're coming from because I've been in the same predicament as you. There were a couple of times in my life where I wanted to gain for my health as well. I hope everything works out for you.


There is a difference between being below average and underweight. My BMI is 16.3, which is technically in the danger zone for being underweight, but I'm extremely healthy and well fed. I don't think gaining weight is necessarily good for your health, unless it's a healthy amount of muscle mass. I've never tried to gain weight for my health, only for my boobies. :3


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## Sina (Oct 27, 2010)

It's good to see the thread going in the right direction, the right way.

hzeigel: I lost a bit too much after a fever, and I put on some weight later, mostly muscle mass. You may be right. I also get a bit concerned about loosing too much weight off the boobs, whenever I lose weight because of stress or whatever. *laugh*


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## Kittann (Apr 12, 2010)

Being 'too skinny' is when a person's weight is effecting their mental and physical health, the same goes for being 'too fat'. That's how I see it.

It does annoy me when people use the word 'curvy' as synonymous for fat. I have an hourglass shape, but I'm a size 6-8. You don't have to be fat to be curvy.​


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

hazelwitch said:


> It's good to see the thread going in the right direction, the right way.
> 
> hzeigel: I lost a bit too much after a fever, and I put on some weight later, mostly muscle mass. You may be right. I also get a bit concerned about loosing too much weight off the boobs, whenever I lose weight because of stress or whatever. *laugh*


I always get a bit worried when I lose more than 3 lbs in a month or less, because I know that it can be dangerous to lose that percentage (for me about 3% lol) of your body weight in a short amount of time. I'm not worried about being thin, just about the possible health consequences to dramatic weight loss. I always gain it back though.


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## Sina (Oct 27, 2010)

hziegel said:


> I always get a bit worried when I lose more than 3 lbs in a month or less, because I know that it can be dangerous to lose that percentage (for me about 3% lol) of your body weight in a short amount of time. I'm not worried about being thin, just about the possible health consequences to dramatic weight loss. I always gain it back though.


That's important. My BMI is just fine, not on the very low end. But, my weight goes up and down 5-10 pounds, not monthly though.

I am glad you take care of yourself.


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

hazelwitch said:


> That's important. My BMI is just fine, not on the very low end. But, my weight goes up and down 5-10 pounds, not monthly though.
> 
> I am glad you take care of yourself.


Me too. n_n I wish everyone else was this health conscientious. It's actually very fortunate that I pay so much attention to health and nutrition, though, because I do have Fibromyalgia. Perhaps other people can afford to be less careful.


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## radiantdawn (Feb 23, 2011)

Umm... How about skinny guys >_> ? >_> >_> >_> I feel dumb for speaking up but I'm still curious. I'm skinny so yeah >_>


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## Eerie (Feb 9, 2011)

I want to know when and where skinny women get thrown under a bus, because I am passed up for skinny women 100% of the time. 

Why does one body type even have to be superior than the other? We all like what we like.


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## Skum (Jun 27, 2010)

@radiantdawn- Seems like a lot of men are self conscious about being skinny. And they shouldn't be.
Skinny men can be totally sexy. It just depends on whether the rest of him is attractive too :tongue:


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## Peripheral (Jan 8, 2011)

aßbiscuits said:


> me too :3.


goddamnit.


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## radiantdawn (Feb 23, 2011)

I like to think I have a nice body in terms of being slim and stuff. But like... I think it's pretty messed (my two 'sizes' DX) ... 26 waist, 28 hips... It's like... I have a mini vague-ish hourglass shape O_O I kinda wish I had muscles and stuff. I don't really care though, as long as my future nonexistant = ( boyfriend is okay with it >_> >_> >_>


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## TaylorP (Mar 22, 2011)

*I would have to say its the proportions to the overall body.*

AS long as your limbs with muscles are in proportion to your torso and so on then skinny will always look better.

A simple thing to look at is MMOs that have 3D Character Creation, EVE Online, has a new one. No one made a "fat or Big" person.
even though the game allows you to. Every one, yes a ton of women play also, picked the more thinner builds over a round body build.

I am 72.5kgs, 6'2", 28 waist and have a 3.1 BMI, NO, I am not sick.
I am a athlete with 56% muscles mass. 
I do not look skinny till I turn sideways, lol, even though I am.

On the side not, big means slow, skinny is fast. Survival . . . .


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## Eerie (Feb 9, 2011)

Skinny isn't always fast, or always healthy. There is a big difference between being healthy and just plain being skinny, I know plenty of rather thin women who aren't any more healthy than I am.


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## AlexOrgasmic (Feb 6, 2011)

As long as they're healthy, no body type is any better than another. Objectively, I prefer girls who aren't very skinny or very, hm, large? Not sure what the PC term is. If their weight suits them, they're fine to look at, but I'm not very attracted to them.
For an example, out of these three, I prefer the middle, or possibly between the middle and the right, instead of the one on the left, who is the current "ideal" weight.


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## The Unseen (Oct 26, 2010)

I personally think it all depends on the confidence level of the person. How they carry themselves is more important to me than their weight. But I am a little biased, I do not like skinny men, I prefer a man with some meat on his bones. I'm simply not as attracted to skinny guys.

Overall though, ones weight shouldn't matter. Women and men alike put way too much emphasis on it, thanks to the mass media, and it's just sickening. People are people. You are either attracted to them or not. You should also be comfortable in your own skin, regardless of size, and regardless if your size doesn't meet someone else's subjective standard of what is physically acceptable.

I'm a bigger woman myself, not skinny, nor fat. Full figured is what I prefer to use, and I love my body. I love how my curves fill me out, it makes me feel sexy.

I think it's important for everyone to have a healthy self-image, because that's all that matters. Who gives a giant shit what other's think.


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## Napoleptic (Oct 29, 2010)

I like scrawny men. I like average-sized men. I like fluffy men.

I also like tall men, short men, old men, young men, stoic men, bubbly men, men with long hair, men with short hair, and men with no hair at all.

Have I mentioned I like men? :laughing: They're just really nice to look at, and they have so many other features to appreciate beyond just their size even if you do have a preference (and I do). Just because you have a preference doesn't mean you aren't able to appreciate anything that deviates from that. Plus there are so many things you can find attractive about a man beyond just his physical attractiveness, and once your heart's hooked any number of those can actually make him seem more physically attractive than he would have to begin with.

So does size matter?

Yes. It's just not the *only* thing that matters.

I know this thread was originally aimed at the topic of skinny women an not men, but there have been others who chimed in about it, and I wanted an excuse to talk about my favorite topic. :happy:

(Heh, just before I went to hit the Submit Reply button, a guy popped in to chat and said he was wanting to put on weight - this is definitely a common topic!)


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

I got weighed when I went for a checkup. 5'11 and 109lbs.

I always have to convince the doctors that I'm not sick/anorexic. It's not hard, as I'm completely healthy, my skin glows, I've got wildly thick & lush hair, and I eat at least 3000 calories a day.

However, IRL, it's really only the girls who act "worried" about my weight. Most guys tell me I have a perfect body, and I get all kinds of male attention daily.

So for me, I'd probably seem too skinny at 99lbs or lower?

I've got a really bird-tiny bone structure though, so YMMV.


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## Psilo (Apr 29, 2009)

I'm pretty skinny. At my heaviest points in the month I get up to about 103-105, and lowest to about 95-98. I'm 5'5''. I don't eat that healthily (but I'm getting better), I just have trouble gaining weight. 

I feel weird when people point it out, but I guess I never feel they mean anything. I think it's the same as when people say "Oh wow! You're tall! Do you play basketball?" It's just kind of a normal response when people see me. As far as I would know, "Goodness you are skinny! You need to eat more!" is a normal greeting. 

The part that really bothers me is I feel like people are looking to see what I eat. If I don't finish my plate, or if I don't stuff my plate with food, suddenly that's tonight's dinner conversation. I've always had a sensitive palate, so I don't eat a wide variety of foods. For social food eating events, I usually have a limited selection, so that especially adds to people's notion that I'm anerexic. I eat until I'm full, and only when I'm hungry. I'll snack during the day. So, I would hope I'm eating enough calories, but I don't count. I just don't want to stuff myself when I'm not hungry. I have a low activity lifestyle, so I'm not burning it all off either.


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## TaylorP (Mar 22, 2011)

I have a very rare disease called "High Metabolism" lol, also hollow legs do not help.

F*** them, their just jealous of you. If they know what they where talking about they would have a perfect body also.


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## ApplePixie (Mar 31, 2011)

i like skinny. i do. i find that i associate larger with a lack of discipline, and lifestyle diseases.

that being said, when you obsess over your weight and almost (or successfully) kill your self trying to become a perfect nothing of a person.... there is a problem. crazy isn't sexy, self destructive isn't sexy.

so i guess its all about healthy, curves are hot on girls. a bit of a tummy is cute on guys... something to grab makes things more fun. but overweight isn't something to be proud of. whenever someone is unhealthy, physically, mentally... its not hot. its not sexy. 

of course there are other things attractive in a person other then their weight, and its perfectly understandable that i should fall in love with an anorexic... or someone who 'eats their feelings" or diabetic, or a thyroid problem, person if their personality is the seller, i'm just saying in general, you want to have your weight within the healthy range to be sexy. its an animal thing i guess... you want your 'mate' to survive.


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## Oleas (Jul 22, 2010)

hziegel said:


> I actually have what is considered the modern 'ideal beauty' as far as measurements, which is a rare line to hit. And yet I was raised in Virginia, where the more classic ideals are still appreciated (large breasts, wide hips and a curved stomach). I was actually mocked, teased and humiliated by both girls and boys for being skinny, even though most of the US would consider me very desirable. I would say that the majority of my school thought I was unattractive. There is no universal ideals of beauty, only a combination of hormonal instinct and superficial ideals we experience through the media. Naturally, I feel that hormone levels have more to do with attraction than any other physical characteristic. I have high estrogen levels and am very instinctively attracted to men with high testosterone levels or who put off particularly strong pheromones. Beyond that it's just personal preference.


Even if you do have an "ideal body", the reason people at your school found you unattractive might have been that they just didn't find you pretty (face wise). It is the thing you see first, and there are many thin girls with ugly faces and big girls with gorgeous features and who thus get noticed more.


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## Kimmery (Aug 11, 2010)

I thought guys were more concerned about the ratio of the hip , waist and bust. I find annoying how people's assumptions of skinny girls is that they aren't real women or curvy. Weight doesn't define your womanhood anyway. 

And I don't like it when people think skinny girls can't be curvy too. And being on the heavier side doesn't make you curvy either. To me, curvy woman look healthy at the weight they're at.


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

Oleas said:


> Even if you do have an "ideal body", the reason people at your school found you unattractive might have been that they just didn't find you pretty (face wise). It is the thing you see first, and there are many thin girls with ugly faces and big girls with gorgeous features and who thus get noticed more.


Wow... that was really mean and uncalled for considering my face is right there on my avatar. -.- Not to mention, you just called my face ugly... Seriously, I don't know what your problem is, but you might want to think before you post.


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

hziegel said:


> Wow... that was really mean and uncalled for considering my face is right there on my avatar. -.- Not to mention, you just called my face ugly... Seriously, I don't know what your problem is, but you might want to think before you post.


I knew _this_ would happen. I don't think she's calling you ugly, I think she's saying that others may not find you attractive. Unless you and @Oleas have a history of cat fights that I'm unaware of, I believe she's making a point. Not everyone is going to adore your face or even my face. I can understand that my facial features won't appeal to everyone out there, just as every single person I see won't always have aesthetic beauty.


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## Stephen (Jan 17, 2011)

Oleas said:


> Even if you do have an "ideal body", the reason people at your school found you unattractive might have been that they just didn't find you pretty (face wise). It is the thing you see first, and there are many thin girls with ugly faces and big girls with gorgeous features and who thus get noticed more.


Considering @hziegel's avatar is of her own face, I'm going to go ahead and point out that your wording here sounds an awful lot like an insult. Shall I give you the benefit of the doubt and say it's careless or thoughtless wording?


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

Fizz said:


> I knew _this_ would happen. I don't think she's calling you ugly, I think she's saying that others may not find you attractive. Unless you and @Oleas have a history of cat fights that I'm unaware of, I believe she's making a point. Not everyone is going to adore your face or even my face. I can understand that my facial features won't appeal to everyone out there, just as every single person I see won't always have aesthetic beauty.


Doesn't make it appropriate to suggest that someone's face could be seen as ugly. I'm sorry, I know that she was "making a point", but she could have considered the implications of saying that to another person. I wouldn't get away with saying, "Maybe some people dislike the way your ass is shaped" if she made a comment about her body.


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

hziegel said:


> Doesn't make it appropriate to suggest that someone's face could be seen as ugly. I'm sorry, I know that she was "making a point", but she could have considered the implications of saying that to another person. I wouldn't get away with saying, "Maybe some people dislike the way your ass is shaped" if she made a comment about her body.


I understand she didn't articulate it very well, but I would just assume she meant to make a point. If it felt too direct like an attack, I would probably confront them outside the thread.


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

Fizz said:


> I understand she didn't articulate it very well, but I would just assume she meant to make a point. If it felt too direct like an attack, I would probably confront them outside the thread.


I think it's pretty relevant to the original post in this thread.


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## Aßbiscuits (Oct 8, 2009)

Fizz said:


> I knew _this_ would happen. I don't think she's calling you ugly, I think she's saying that others may not find you attractive. Unless you and @Oleas have a history of cat fights that I'm unaware of, I believe she's making a point. Not everyone is going to adore your face or even my face. I can understand that my facial features won't appeal to everyone out there, just as every single person I see won't always have aesthetic beauty.


But she said most people reacted this way, which means most people would find her face unattractive. I don't think Oleas is a malicious person who would stoop as low as to comment on someone's appearance in such a fashion though (and if she did mean that I don't agree with what she's said, why she said it or how she said it).

Anyway, it says I posted here but I don't remember so I'll probably end up repeating myself. I like my girls to be not fat, this is a superficial and shallow preference I have. What I consider not fat reaches to about the level of "curvy". Apparently the girls I've gone for though (I'm a face and boob person primarily so I don't care if someone surpasses my "standards") have been considered fat, I don't agree though so maybe I'm not that superficial







.


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## Stephen (Jan 17, 2011)

I haven't had a girlfriend who could accurately be called "skinny" since High School. It's never been a consideration for me. Two of my exes were obese, and I never had a problem with their appearance. Size has never been a factor for me when picking a partner, and neither has the change in their weight over the relationship, in either direction. I wouldn't reject a woman for being or becoming thin any more than I would for her being or becoming otherwise. Appearance in general is not important for long term happiness, or even for attraction as far as I'm concerned. Personality is where I build attraction.

I can see the perspective of the OP. Being treated differently for being thin is no better than being treated differently for not being thin. For example, as a male, I get to walk down the street wearing whatever I like without being harassed by passing drivers (honestly I dress conservatively but I don't think it matters) and I think it's only fair that women should be granted the same experience from the unwashed driving masses. I think if I were obese, I might get things yelled at me, even as a male, though.


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## Monte (Feb 17, 2010)

Eh, I don't think she meant that insultingly.

Just tossing my two cents in there.


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## cal47 (Jun 1, 2010)

I've been underweight most of my life. I can relate with what some have pointed out that people tend to nonchalantly comment on my weight while being completely oblivious to the fact that it's mean. It's especially bad with family members because it's "out of love". 
I worked really hard to put on weight most of last year. I started at 5'9" 115lb. I'd cram 3000-3500 calories a day (which is freaking expensive btw) and work out 5 times a week. In about 5-6 months I got up to 135 of all muscle and I felt really good about myself.
And yet I'd go home and people would be like "Oh my you're always so skinny! You need to eat more, have some more pie!" That's so fucking deflating it's not even funny. Just to paint a picture of how ridiculous my metabolism is, I couldn't continue to afford 3500 hundred calories of food per day so I dropped 10 pounds in a couple of months by eating more along the lines of 2500.... it's really frustrating... I'm sitting at around 128 now and still trying to get it up. 
Something that annoys me is that women seem to have an unclear idea of what a strong male looks like with a shirt on. I have a friend who's about 5'10 and 200lb. He looks a little round but it suits him ok.. he looks healthy. Compare us side by side and most women would assume that he's much stronger than I am. This is ridiculously untrue. He can't even lift once what I work out with in sets. Yeah... frustrating..


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## Oleas (Jul 22, 2010)

Sorry @hziegel, I didn't mean for my post to be personal at all, I was trying to make the point that while someone might have a perfect body, their face won't necessarily appeal to some people, and I think facial features matter a lot in overall attractiveness. I would never imply that any member of this forum is bad looking, and the same goes for you. Besides, beauty is a subjective matter, and no one can be beautiful to everyone they're seen by (not that I think you're not).

While a lot of people do care about body shape, figure, overall healthiness and other criteria in regards to the body alone, I think the main thing that one is attracted to in a potential SO is the face. Personally, I think I would be more likely to date a guy with an ok body and beautiful face (at least from my point of view) than a guy I'm not attracted to at all face wise with a perfect body.

I apologize if I offended you or seemed disrespectful, it wasn't my intention.


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## SyndiCat (Oct 2, 2010)

Hmpf, I like skinny women. I like it when they look a bit fragile too, for some reason it invokes a cautious and protective instinct in me, as well as sexual. I just don't like it if they're mentally fragile, because it comes with a certain responsibility that I would prefer not to engage in.


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