# Dorming survival thread for introverts



## paperoceans (Sep 27, 2009)

What are some of your tips? Things that you learned and things that you hated? I need to survive this for two years


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## Fleetfoot (May 9, 2011)

1. Dorm experiences are never the same for any individual. Sometimes, you get a bad hand of cards...ever see The Roommate? Your experience will probably not even be as close as being that bad, sometimes you get a good one. This is basically just a disclaimer to my following advice, as my experience was basically the worst experience of my life, but it has nothing to do with type, or my own personality, etc.

2. On to the tips! Don't live in your room 24/7. It is unhealthy for you, and it is unhealthy for your potential roommate. Instead, go to the library to study, or go around campus and meet up with people in your class if you want to.

3. Stay tidy, and respect your roommate's belongings and their wishes (such as 'Don't eat any of my food unless I say you can')

4. COMMUNICATE!!!!!! COMMUNICATE!!!!! COMMUNICATE!!!!!!! I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH! Having a dormmate (assuming you're sharing the same room) is like having a spouse, without the sex. It's 100% not going to work out if there is no communication between the two of you (or three...or four...I had that problem, and one of them didn't speak English, but that's another story moving on). Communicate your needs and wants with them, and BE HONEST! Don't be nice about it. Tell them to be honest as well.

5. I'm sorry if I'm making this sound scary, but again, let me stress that I had a terrible experience with this, and not every experience is the same. In fact, there are always rare possibilities where you can't communicate with your roommate because the only thing they can say is 'Hello', or that they have a mental disorder or they like to steal things, or the school put too many in a room and doesn't care to change it. In reality, you are most likely going to run into a problem in the long run, but just make sure you have your communication lines open with each other, or else problems are going to snowball down a hill.


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## paperoceans (Sep 27, 2009)

What's your story? Haha, I'm curious...


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## wandai (Feb 8, 2011)

I lived in dormitories when I was 13, up till 17 for my high school. Then from 18 and 19, during my pre-university. From 20 till 22 throughout the university and finally, now, when I start working. 

I'm pretty much the next door introvert. I don't really see the need to socialize much. And I need my "spot". Maybe I'm lucky for not having a roommate from hell. Then again, there are some dramas amongst people I've been living with. And ain't pretty. 

Anyway, I don't really know you, @paperoceans. Thus I would not know whether these tips apply for you. First, be flexible, don't let the small details sweat you. Be willing to let small things slide. This is crucial as not to let yourself be overwhelmed with roommate issues when you should be focusing more into things that matter. 

As Tawanda mentioned, communicate with your roommates. You didn't have to make your roommates your new best friends, though. Just be courteous. Oh, please inform any specific life-threatening allergies that you have to your roommates. 

Please don't be passive-aggressive. If there are anything that your roommate did that bothers you, confront them. Yes, it may be tricky, but just do it. Don't resort to passive-aggressive wars. It's childish.

Be willing to step out from your comfort zone. Say yes for the roommates invitation once in a while. As long as it is not illegal, there are no harm in doing things that you've never done before. It is a nice experience, to say the least.

Keep your place clean. It didn't have to be sparkling clean, unless you like it that way. At least, don't let your place messy. That being said, don't comment on your roommate's messiness. 

I think that is about it. For me, being flexible works like charms.


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## amon91 (Feb 1, 2011)

So I felt like flipping the coin here:

I'm moving out to university later this year and I'm absolutely psyched about living in a dorm and having a social life essentially just a few steps away at all times. I'm still deciding whether I'm going to share my room or not. I'm leaning towards doing it (with one more person), since two people are always better than one when you're stuck in a huge city with literally none of your old friends.

Even if I don't, I'm looking forward to spending long hours with people, as long as I don't need to study/work. Meeting people is always a good idea.

I know I'm an E, but whatever you do, don't isolate yourself.


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## paperoceans (Sep 27, 2009)

@amon91 That's the worst advice that I've ever heard.

I don't get why some of you extroverts think we like to isolate ourselves, we do it for the enjoyment. Just like how you need a bunch of people to spend time with for hours to entertain yourself. I do my shit, I just don't like talking for hours nonstop and entertaining people for more than 2-3hrs. It's tiring and I get irritable and awful to be around because I feel like my personal space is being invaded. I'll rather separate myself than go batshit crazy on someone.


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## amon91 (Feb 1, 2011)

paperoceans said:


> @amon91 That's the worst advice that I've ever heard.
> 
> I don't get why some of you extroverts think we like to isolate ourselves, we do it for the enjoyment. Just like how you need a bunch of people to spend time with for hours to entertain yourself. I do my shit, I just don't like talking for hours nonstop and entertaining people for more than 2-3hrs. It's tiring and I get irritable and awful to be around because I feel like my personal space is being invaded. I'll rather separate myself than go batshit crazy on someone.


As I said, I flipped up the coin. I was just looking at the perspective of going to a dorm from an E's point of view.

I think you'll have room to be alone. In college, people are adults. You'll most likely be able to sit in the corner and read a book or just be alone with your own thoughts without having anyone bothering you.


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## RyRyMini (Apr 12, 2010)

This semester (ending tomorrow!) is the first one I've spent living in a dorm.

I lucked out as an introvert and ended up with a roommate who literally only sleeps in the room and comes in randomly to grab something and then leaves again. Sometimes he studies in our room but it's not often. We're friends and we talk sometimes at night, but it's nothing exhausting. He sometimes calls me antisocial for the fact that I spend so much time by myself and turn down some of his invitations, but it doesn't bother me..I'm used to it as an introvert and I know he's not mad about it or anything.

Even if you don't end up in a circumstance like mine, there will be times when you're alone. If I need alone time, go to the library, cafe on campus, and the lounges. Even if there are people around, I don't interact with them in these instances so I I'm still getting my alone time and feel recharged afterwords. 

If you're having trepidation about moving on campus, I think it's normal. I was super nervous, but I'm glad for the way it turned out. I feel like I'm a part of something (it's a feeling I don't normally have) even though I'm not actively participating in campus life 24/7.


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## ByzantineBird (Sep 4, 2010)

Yo I am a big introvert, and am in the dorm system now. I say go for a single if you can and its not too late, I did, and loved it. i modelled my dorm room interactions with the rest of the room like NK, no one gets in or out, I need my peace.

I do think it would have been better if i studied outside of my room. I found it hard to destress, i think because i studied in my room it was always the work room, i could never feel at ease, so study in the libraries bro, study on sundays and friday nights its the best too very few around but the elite of the elite like me, i think, lol. good luck.


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## track02 (Mar 28, 2011)

Can you not get a room to yourself?

I found being on campus all day tiring enough.


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