# ISFP as a young child



## ReliK (Feb 24, 2019)

Hey ISFP's. 

I'm curious what childhood may have been like for you, specifically the earlier years (say under 9). Did you experience yourself as being very sensitive to discipline or criticisms? Were you painfully shy or did you find it easy to be around others? Did you have a marked love and interest towards animals, nature, going on adventures, music and art? Did you love reading? What was your favorite things to play or do? Were you very well behaved or kinda wild? Did you feel a strong belonging in your family unit or with friends, or more of an outsider vibe? Did you enjoy being in a school or was it absolute hell on your Fi? 

Feel free to respond to all, some or none if it's easier to chime in with whatever you'd like to share. It'd be interesting to see if there are any stronger trends to any of it.. though enneagram likely plays a big role here. I can find tons of info on many of the other types, not so much on ISFP though (surprise surprise hah). It'd be great to hear from you.


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## ReliK (Feb 24, 2019)

@AnneM see ya lurking there, and think you mentioned your spouse being ISFP in another thread. If you have any second-hand info or stories you can share, please do!


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## AnneM (May 29, 2019)

I shall answer on behalf of my ISFP husband. 



ultracrepidarian said:


> Did you experience yourself as being very sensitive to discipline or criticisms?


His big problem was feeling that he lacked the ability to articulate his own defense, and that, even if he'd had the ability, he wouldn't've been listened to by those in authority.



> Were you painfully shy or did you find it easy to be around others?


He wasn't shy. He says he was very open to human interaction, but the interaction he received never seemed very reliable to him, like something he could count on being there from day to day. 



> Did you have a marked love and interest towards animals, nature, going on adventures...?


He's told me that he spent most of his time wandering around outside alone in the wild areas surrounding their neighborhood. Making little hideouts. Finding snail shells and pretending they were spaceships. Using clay and sticks to make little huts. He was big into sound effects. 



> Did you love reading?


He had no readers around him. He didn't get into reading voraciously until middle school (fantasy and sci-fi). These days, he's funny about reading. He'll go _years_ without reading a single book, but when he does pick one up (almost always something he's read before), he is on a different planet. There's no communicating with him whatsoever. 



> Were you very well behaved or kinda wild?


He started out well-behaved.....and it just steadily went downhill until he was a goddamn teenage hooligan. 



> Did you feel a strong belonging in your family unit, or more of an outsider vibe?


With his parents and sister, he definitely didn't feel a close bond (they've gotten closer since we've been together). He was extremely close to his grandparents, however, who took care of him a lot. 



> Did you enjoy being in a school environment, around other kids? Or was there such a sensitivity that it made being around others difficult? Did you do well in school?


*He hated school.* (He just corrected me and said, "I *fucking* hated school.") I've seen him punch a wall because he was thinking about something one of his elementary school teachers did or said! Honestly, if he were going to kill someone from his past, he'd probably start with one of them. 

He always longed for the adventurous groups of friends he saw on movies like "The Goonies." That was a major disappointment for him. He had a handful of close friendships, but mostly he was quite lonely. He was bullied some for his weight, and that deeply affected him.


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## ReliK (Feb 24, 2019)

@AnneM thank you lady! I can relate to quite a bit of it myself, especially the well-behaved to hooligan shift and just an intense need to be wandering around outside in nature, tangibly creating stuff while also heavily immersed in fantasy and story lines, using physical props to play it all out. Do you know his enneagram by chance?


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## AnneM (May 29, 2019)

ultracrepidarian said:


> @AnneM thank you lady! I can relate to quite a bit of it myself, especially the well-behaved to hooligan shift and just an intense need to be wandering around outside in nature, tangibly creating stuff while also heavily immersed in fantasy and story lines, using physical props to play it all out. Do you know his enneagram by chance?


You're so welcome, lady! His enneagram is 9w8. You can ask me anything else about him you want to know. I think he likes it when I'm talking about him on PerC because it means I'm not.....doing other things. :laughing:


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## Notus Asphodelus (Jan 20, 2015)

I can relate to most of what Anne has mentioned.


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## WarmMachines (May 19, 2016)

ReliK said:


> Hey ISFP's.
> 
> I'm curious what childhood may have been like for you, specifically the earlier years (say under 9). Did you experience yourself as being very sensitive to discipline or criticisms? Were you painfully shy or did you find it easy to be around others? Did you have a marked love and interest towards animals, nature, going on adventures, music and art? Did you love reading? What was your favorite things to play or do? Were you very well behaved or kinda wild? Did you feel a strong belonging in your family unit or with friends, or more of an outsider vibe? Did you enjoy being in a school or was it absolute hell on your Fi?
> 
> Feel free to respond to all, some or none if it's easier to chime in with whatever you'd like to share. It'd be interesting to see if there are any stronger trends to any of it.. though enneagram likely plays a big role here. I can find tons of info on many of the other types, not so much on ISFP though (surprise surprise hah). It'd be great to hear from you.


I was a well-behaved and fun child, start to finish. Everyone loved me.
No, I wasn't shy one bit around my family. But sometimes we'd have guests over, and I'd become really awkward and uncomfortable around them, and really quiet.
I had a marked love for arts and nature. I was a natural in musical instrument, pitch etc. And I loved outdoors events.
I liked taking my toys apart to see their inner mechanisms, and I liked recording myself acting as a teacher, recording my thoughts etc. I loved play-pretend.
I had my own world, I never worried about belonging. I developed that trait as a pre-teen, due to peer pressure. And lost that trait again when I was in the final days of high school.
I liked the school-life. I had my favorite teachers whose classes I'd ace, and I was very methodical in my approach with school-work and was very enthusiastic about it.


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## ryanbest (Jan 14, 2020)

Do you have some more info?


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## livenlove (Mar 5, 2018)

ReliK said:


> Did you experience yourself as being very sensitive to discipline or criticisms?


Yes - I was very sensitive to negative criticism, discipline, being yelled at, etc. But I tried very hard not to show it on the outside and only cried when I was alone. 



ReliK said:


> Were you painfully shy or did you find it easy to be around others?


I loved meeting new people and always made friends rather easily. I was very reserved and observant around strangers so it could have been misinterpreted as being shy. However, once I became more familiar with people, I felt more comfortable opening up, joking around, and becoming more chatty.



ReliK said:


> Did you have a marked love and interest towards animals, nature, going on adventures, music and art?


Loved all of the above. 



ReliK said:


> Did you love reading?


I was an avid reader and really enjoyed using my imagination while reading. Although, I grew up in a strict household and was forced to read - Had I not been forced, I'm not sure if I would have loved reading as much. I probably would've rather played outside with my friends lol



ReliK said:


> What was your favorite things to play or do?


I loved to play outside with friends or do anything creative, such as drawing, painting, making jewelry, arts/crafts, writing, listening to music, play instruments, etc. 



ReliK said:


> Were you very well behaved or kinda wild?


In general, I was very well behaved as a child and always wanted to please adults. At home, I was a bit more of a quiet rebel (the problem of being an SP child with controlling SJ parents  ) 



ReliK said:


> Did you feel a strong belonging in your family unit or with friends, or more of an outsider vibe?


From the outside, I never had an issue with fitting into friend groups or "acting" like I fit in because I generally get along with everyone and can be a chameleon in social situations. But on the inside, I never really felt like I completely belonged. I'm very independent and have always preferred to be my own individual rater than following a crowd for the sake of "belonging". 



ReliK said:


> Did you enjoy being in a school or was it absolute hell on your Fi?


I loved school because it was an opportunity to see my friends and I enjoyed learning some (not all) subjects.


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## Tazz (Jun 10, 2020)

To answer to OP questions

1) I'm very sensitive to some discipline and criticisms. I did not respond well to being yelled at, at all. 

2) I was very shy to strangers till my adult years. But I had trust issues so I wouldn't open up to strangers in the school years till at least a year after I met them usually. I was more chatty with family and family friends. 

3) I had big interest in animals and nature. In high school years I had love for going on adventures and traveling. Art and sports was a big stress reliever for me in my school years. Eh, I'm not a book reader. If I do find a book that I like though it like I'm in another world. I can't be bothered till I finish reading it. 

4) I was very well behaved in school in my childhood. Rarely a trouble maker. 
5) Strong belonging... I'm not sure, some families I do and some I don't. 
6) High school was fun overall. But I did not like middle school at all.


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## PathSeeker (Aug 3, 2020)

Shy, mostly liked books and Wikipedia, probably somewhat arrogant, very critical and challenging, mostly interested in science and math, somewhat observant, enjoyed the presence of nature, hadn't gone through any existential crises yet.


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## chocolate01 (Jul 27, 2020)

I am not 100% sure if I am an ISFP, but I was typed as ISFP here, so I will add my experience too!


ReliK said:


> Did you experience yourself as being very sensitive to discipline or criticisms?


I was not very sensitive to criticism as a child, there weren't many criticisms made anyways haha (I think because I was a child). I did follow the rules well and didn't do things told not to do. I got easily scared and was afraid of many things, so didn't do things my parents told me not to do.



ReliK said:


> Were you painfully shy or did you find it easy to be around others?


I was not very shy. I was an introvert and quiet, but not shy. I found it easy to be around people. However, now I think my type changed or something because I am very shy and can't stand being around people..



ReliK said:


> Did you have a marked love and interest towards animals, nature, going on adventures, music and art?


I did love animals, I had turtles, a bunny, and a chick, and a hamster. I don't remember if I liked nature or adventure but I did go outdoors a lot to play with kids or to catch butterflies and study animals, etc. I liked riding bikes also. I played the piano since I was a child, but didn't enjoy it too much when I was younger. It wasn't until my later years that I started to really enjoy playing (I would say during my teen years). Other than for playing the piano, I don't think I appreciated other types of art too much as a child.



ReliK said:


> Did you love reading?


I loved reading very much. I always had books around me and enjoyed fairy tales the most. I liked reading all kinds of books but mostly novels. I enjoyed reading classics and fantasy books.



ReliK said:


> What was your favorite things to play or do?


I liked watching animations like Pokémon and Sailormoon. I would rewatch things I liked a lot over and over and would not get tired. Same with the books I liked, I would read the same book over and over until I remember it so well. I liked playing games on computer, such as Sonic and Mario. I liked going outside to the playground to build sand castles and play with my sister or friends.



ReliK said:


> Were you very well behaved or kinda wild?


I was a well-behaved kid. I never got into trouble at school or at home. I think it may have been because I was scared of taking risks and I am still the same way.



ReliK said:


> Did you feel a strong belonging in your family unit or with friends, or more of an outsider vibe?


I felt a strong belonging in my family and my close friends. I wasn't afraid of getting abandoned or anything when I was young. However, in my teenage years a lot of things happened and I struggled a lot. Now I only trust my family and only a few people on my life. As a kid though, I was very trusting and had a sense of belonging in my family and friends. I did feel I was a little different though, like my friends would get jealous and fight with each other, but I never felt such feelings as a kid. I think I was pretty easygoing. I also could get stubborn sometimes and do outrageous things, like not participating in the talent show that everyone was participating in because I was "hungry" lol when I was like 5 (that's what I told my mom then. I don't think that was the real reason- I may have found something annoying or was maybe just shy, I don't remember but that was weird of me lol.) I just stood there on stage and didn't dance, being really stubborn. I don't remember it but my mom told me about it and said that was really weird because I was a good kid and would not usually act that way.



ReliK said:


> Did you enjoy being in a school or was it absolute hell on your Fi?


It was okay when I was a kid. But I didn't like it as I got into my teenage years after I went through some stuff. When I was young, I don't think I minded too much. I just went because I had to.

I hope that helps! But sorry if it doesn't haha.. maybe I wasn't an ISFP.. maybe I was INFJ because I liked writing weird fantasy stories too and had wild imaginations as a kid. But assuming I was ISFP, I was a pretty easygoing, outdoorsy kid who was well-behaved and well-liked by other kids and my friends' parents (my friends' parents loved me haha, probably because I wasn't a troublemaker or a "bad influence" for my friends. (Not anymore though I am not easygoing anymore, always stressed, just a stubborn, doubtful person.. I think maybe my type changed)


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## gordontufano (11 mo ago)

I had some difficulty in making my point. I was a little passive in this because I quickly got tired of the evidence and gave up even before the conversations. I had a particular interest in animals because I felt like an advocate for a bit of creature that needed my help. And now I have a child like that. He's shy, closeted. We even thought that he might have autism, but a checkup at https://www.cameronmch.com/services/pediatrics/ showed that he doesn't. I want to give my boy the best childhood possible and be an understanding parent without smothering him in my care.


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## Eshfor (Jun 16, 2021)

I remember really disliking school, experiencing bullying and constantly wanting to run away from classes. My mother and I didn't get on well as she wanted to go into a career and my father drank all the time. He was an addict. It was difficult for me to get along with my peers. My mother sent me to Foster Plus: Home to watch me change afterwards. Now I think the mistake I made in my upbringing was the tyranny my father applied to me. My mother kept quiet and did not tell anyone. I didn't know about my rights, the police or the possibilities to stop it all. So I would not want my children to grow up disadvantaged and depressed.


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