# i think my friend likes me and idk what to do



## helio (Mar 23, 2021)

First we were friends, now that we’re closer i asked him to go to the ramen shop with me last week and we have been chatting constantly, after that he asks me to go to the burger place and i went with him. And i can feel that he likes me even though i don’t have feelings for him nor i wanna go out. The problem is that i feel like im the one who led him on, even though he’s not a bad guy. The start of this week I’ve been socializing with him much less, to put some distance, and i kinda feel bad. I can feel that he likes me now bc he’s much kinder to me and always says he wont judge me and replies to my chats really quick. So pls advice bc im a dumbass who brought this up on myself, i shouldnt have asked him to go the ramen shop together, i just wanna remain as friends. Also i might be getting ahead of myself, but still i can feel it since im not that dense


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## SilentRobbie (10 mo ago)

Show Him, Tell Him or Avoid Him.

Show
Showing someone Your unintetest is Harsh & should be avoided, but makes a better Read.

If You don't wanna have too many dm's with Him, Invite Him late to public things AND Invite either another Guy for Yourself or pretend to introduce Him to a Female Friend, then bail immediately & She should bail immediately after You just bailed.

Inviting Him late & showing uninterest are both Key, if You only do 1, You could be reinforcing His feelings.

Tell
If You think He can easily deal with only being friends, be nice about it, if not, be direct.

"Sorry" "Didn't mean" "Just in Case" "Still be Friends" are all Nice.

"Look" "To be Clear" "Heads Up" & any phrase that could be used to 'direct' a person in everyday life are also ... Direct.

If You feel Him liking You & not reciprocating that back, He may be hoping You're shy, tell Him otherwise but say You still want to be friends. If He doesn't want friendship, a relationship wouldn't work anyway.

If He really is Nice He may need consolling after Telling Him, honestly Showing Him Your uninterest is harsh, but sometimes people are thick headed.


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## Schizoid (Jan 31, 2015)

helio said:


> First we were friends, now that we’re closer i asked him to go to the ramen shop with me last week and we have been chatting constantly, after that he asks me to go to the burger place and i went with him. And i can feel that he likes me even though i don’t have feelings for him nor i wanna go out. The problem is that i feel like im the one who led him on, even though he’s not a bad guy. The start of this week I’ve been socializing with him much less, to put some distance, and i kinda feel bad. I can feel that he likes me now bc he’s much kinder to me and always says he wont judge me and replies to my chats really quick. So pls advice bc im a dumbass who brought this up on myself, i shouldnt have asked him to go the ramen shop together, i just wanna remain as friends. Also i might be getting ahead of myself, but still i can feel it since im not that dense


Do you owe him any money? Has he spent any money on you when he went to the ramen shop and the burger place with you? Did he give you a treat and help to pay for your meals? And what about transport? Do you owe him any gas money? If yes, then return him back all his money.

If you didn't like him back, then stop accepting his money, or else it would send him the wrong signals.


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## MisterYellowFace (Jan 22, 2021)

Yes. And Don't lead him on. Also tell him what you meant. Tell him you just want to be friends. And he might be a little dissapointed but that's fine. Give him his money back. Like a FRIEND would. And just keep supporting him. And being nice. Don't let your friendship fall apart over this.


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## thedazzlingdexter (12 mo ago)

helio said:


> First we were friends, now that we’re closer i asked him to go to the ramen shop with me last week and we have been chatting constantly, after that he asks me to go to the burger place and i went with him. And i can feel that he likes me even though i don’t have feelings for him nor i wanna go out. The problem is that i feel like im the one who led him on, even though he’s not a bad guy. The start of this week I’ve been socializing with him much less, to put some distance, and i kinda feel bad. I can feel that he likes me now bc he’s much kinder to me and always says he wont judge me and replies to my chats really quick. So pls advice bc im a dumbass who brought this up on myself, i shouldnt have asked him to go the ramen shop together, i just wanna remain as friends. Also i might be getting ahead of myself, but still i can feel it since im not that dense


You can either handle this issue the 

Passive way 
Pass them on to a single freind of yours who needs a partner 
Aviod until they finally get bored and move on 
Pretend you are into a different team. As in "Im into girls you not a girl/Into guys and you not a guy" 
Date them out of pressure until they eventually break up with you 


The direct way 
Tell them you do not like them that way and you want to be friends. 
Tell them firmly but clear way. 

or the Rude way 
Tell them in the harshest possible way that you are never going to date them. 

You might have to do the RUDE way if they do not get the hint. Some poeple dont be them male or female.


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## Celtsincloset (Feb 17, 2014)

helio said:


> First we were friends, now that we’re closer i asked him to go to the ramen shop with me last week and we have been chatting constantly, after that he asks me to go to the burger place and i went with him. And i can feel that he likes me even though i don’t have feelings for him nor i wanna go out. The problem is that i feel like im the one who led him on, even though he’s not a bad guy. The start of this week I’ve been socializing with him much less, to put some distance, and i kinda feel bad. I can feel that he likes me now bc he’s much kinder to me and always says he wont judge me and replies to my chats really quick. So pls advice bc im a dumbass who brought this up on myself, i shouldnt have asked him to go the ramen shop together, i just wanna remain as friends. Also i might be getting ahead of myself, but still i can feel it since im not that dense


The nicest thing to do is just tell them you just want to be friends, and apologise.


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## helio (Mar 23, 2021)

Schizoid said:


> Do you owe him any money? Has he spent any money on you when he went to the ramen shop and the burger place with you? Did he give you a treat and help to pay for your meals? And what about transport? Do you owe him any gas money? If yes, then return him back all his money.
> 
> If you didn't like him back, then stop accepting his money, or else it would send him the wrong signals.


i paid for my ownself


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## helio (Mar 23, 2021)

MisterYellowFace said:


> Yes. And Don't lead him on. Also tell him what you meant. Tell him you just want to be friends. And he might be a little dissapointed but that's fine. Give him his money back. Like a FRIEND would. And just keep supporting him. And being nice. Don't let your friendship fall apart over this.


how do i tell him when he hasnt confessed, i dont wanna get embarrassed later


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## islandlight (Aug 13, 2013)

Back off a bit. Don't invite him anywhere, and don't accept invitations from him. Don't initiate chats. You can still be decent and polite. If he initiates, just tell him you're busy, and/or Bye, gotta go.

His interest will fizzle out.


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## Celtsincloset (Feb 17, 2014)

@islandlight @helio
IMO, adding to that, if you don't scratch out their plans, or you allow yourself to get into the conversations you don't want to have, for the sake of politeness, a lot of men, especially young, can misinterpret this... and it can bring the end of the relationship once the final straw has been broken. But it's probably not worth _ghosting_ them in the end, it's usually bad, it's better just to make it clear to them, maybe by having a fake boyfriend or something.


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## islandlight (Aug 13, 2013)

@Celtsincloset , yes, it's best to be fairly direct, but it's a fine line that still has me stumped sometimes. If I misread his signs and put him off clearly, he might get mad and say I'm imagining things, he's sick of women pulling this crap, etc.

It's easier if he makes a physical pass. Then you can remove his hand, move away, or say no. And then act like it never happened.


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## Celtsincloset (Feb 17, 2014)

islandlight said:


> @Celtsincloset , yes, it's best to be fairly direct, but it's a fine line that still has me stumped sometimes. If I misread his signs and put him off clearly, he might get mad and say I'm imagining things, he's sick of women pulling this crap, etc.
> 
> It's easier if he makes a physical pass. Then you can remove his hand, move away, or say no. And then act like it never happened.


I think it depends on the man.

If it happened to me, the girl incorrectly assumed I was into her and told me she wasn’t interested, I would just literally laugh it off. I also like the openness she has created, which is a good sign for friendship, in both scenarios.

I’ve got the experience of being burnt before by a woman who was too polite to say anything. I talked to her for an entire day at a tennis club function, ‘cause I was really bored, and I also spoke to her on numerous other occasions, but what I wish I learnt was that she actually hated me. When I walked up to her for a dance in the school gymnasium, she literally ran away from me. I had no idea what was going on, and then I had no partner for the dance practice and the teacher was like “Hey everyone, here’s the guy with no partner”. At least one of my friends found it funny.


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