# Infj and Enfp UNAVOIDABLE chemistry, and compatibility??!



## HalfwayThere

Hi! Infj female here. 
Ok so i have a friend who is an enfp. And WOW. Thats all i can say. 

Hes just so oddly attractive to me. Not that i _*like *_him, but i am 100% sure that if i dont continue to watch it i will. Like, 'omg his personality is SOO HOT'. I literally have to keep reminding myself the entire time hes in my presence not to think about him that way because theres so many other reasons why it would never work. I try my best not to spend much time around him when im with other people, because when we do we end up spending all our time focused on each other. Or maybe its just me that feels this way? We never argue, and we have some downright AWSOME times together. Like, to the point where my other friends feel left out. He brings me out of my shell in a good way, and well, im not quite sure why he always wants to hang around me but he does. 

Anyway... I guess we just click? We can talk for hours and never get bored. Its effortless! But i am STRUGGLING here! I dont want to be, but I just feel naturally drawn to him! Its just seems unavoidable.

Ive read up on the posts that talk about infj and enfp relationships and chemistry, and everyone says that these relationships are almost otherworldly

Idk what i want out of this thread, im just blabbering now. Maybe reasons why i just cant seem to help it? What are your thoughts and feelings about what ive said? 

Post whatever is on your mind!


----------



## MissJordan

Why is liking this ENFP a bad thing?
Why fight it?


Also, the obligatory:



> Post whatever is on your mind!


"Man, I can _not _get comfortable in this chair".



> Idk what i want out of this thread, im just blabbering now.


Hardy hardy harr harr, looks like _someone _ought to work on their Fi.


----------



## HalfwayThere

MissJordan said:


> Why is liking this ENFP a bad thing?
> Why fight it?


 He just happens to be my best friend's brother. Been there before with another friend and things didnt work out very well...

And Fi is probably one of my least developed functions. I utterly suck at it! I need someone to help me lol


----------



## Tridentus

that's one of the reasons why INFJ-ENFP is a good idea- complementary. you may suck at Fi but he sucks at Fe, but unlike most differences between people, INFJs and ENFPs mutually appreciate each others' differences in a unique way.

been there done that with this connection. enjoy it. i love that feeling of intuitive mutual connection with each other. i sadly don't have any INFJs ladies in my life at the moment, but i have an INFJ friend, and even though that connection isn't as strong as sexual chemistry is bound to be; we still share that unique intuitive connection.

i've had some serious chemistry with INFPs and ENFPs in the past, but only INFJs have that mystical intuitive feeling of instant understanding.

i say keep going as you are.. if in the future it gets to a point where you're willing to risk things with your friend then so be it. it may never reach that point but there's no need to starve yourself of someone you connect with.


----------



## Vanishing Point

Yesss... ENFPs make me feel like I would accidentally discovering forgotten libraries, finding faeries by the parking lot, eating cupcakes made of rainbows, or if I spontaneously learned how to fly. 
I married one with whom the attraction was epic enough for me to follow him half way accross the world.


----------



## HalfwayThere

Vanishing Point said:


> Yesss... ENFPs make me feel like I would accidentally discovering forgotten libraries, finding faeries by the parking lot, eating cupcakes made of rainbows, or if I spontaneously learned how to fly.


Yes, thats pretty much the exact feeling!


----------



## HalfwayThere

Yea true, true because i still like being around him. 

Just throwing this out there to everyone, but does it seem like the infj/enfp compatability is more talked about than the infj/entp compatability? Idk, it just seems that way.


----------



## Zjin

A while ago, I met a female ENFP ... (I’m a male INFJ) at a meeting and indeed “WOW”. OP: your post is very recognizable. Actually I would only stay 1 hour after the meeting, but instead I spent the whole day there and talked to her about several topics. 

We started a bit “cold”, but once my ice was broken....haha. She really brought me out of my shell. The conversations we had were pretty intense and I found out that she does things entirely different then I would do. I told her that and that made the whole conversation even more interesting. For example: there were some people around us and she starts to goof around a bit in a way that I would never dare to do.... she made some jokes that I really found funny. On the other hand I noticed that she was a lot more then just a funny person. She’s way more deep then I thought on first sight and she blew me away with some theories about the state and her analysis about people... I was like: “what the hell....” ;-). .. The whole conversation was very intuitive and all felt very “natural”. 

I’m not in love or something, but just want to share this experience with you and point out: ENFP are really fascinating ;-) ..


----------



## Doom

HalfwayThere said:


> Yea true, true because i still like being around him.
> 
> Just throwing this out there to everyone, but does it seem like the infj/enfp compatability is more talked about than the infj/entp compatability? Idk, it just seems that way.


Recently this has crossed my mind and my guess is because there is more of an instant click with ENFP/INFJs (possibly due to rounding each other with our functions) where as with INFJ-ENTP there is this "You annoy me but I can't help but find you intriguing" aspect that a lot of INFJ/ENTPs don't get past. 

A bit off topic but Toradora (Greatest love story ever told) is about an IxFJ who is in love with an ENFP but befriends her ENTP friend and you can only guess where this goes.


----------



## Razare

HalfwayThere said:


> Maybe reasons why i just cant seem to help it? What are your thoughts and feelings about what ive said?
> 
> Post whatever is on your mind!



The combo just naturally works for some reason. I've met two female ENFP's and there was chemistry both times.

Frankly, I'm not that into the type specifically as I've sort of learned to distrust any sort of irrational draw to a person. I'm attracted to certain female physical conditions, but that doesn't mean they're a good pairing, just as MBTI doesn't either. Yes, it may mean our personalities pair, but that's perhaps only twenty to forty percent of the equation.

Anyway...


----------



## HalfwayThere

Doom said:


> Recently this has crossed my mind and my guess is because there is more of an instant click with ENFP/INFJs (possibly due to rounding each other with our functions) where as with INFJ-ENTP there is this "You annoy me but I can't help but find you intriguing" aspect that a lot of INFJ/ENTPs don't get past.


Yea! I guess with ENTPs it takes longer to be ourselves than with ENFPs, because ENFPs are just so naturally open you cant help but be the same


----------



## HalfwayThere

Zjin said:


> A while ago, I met a female ENFP ... (I’m a male INFJ) at a meeting and indeed “WOW”. OP: your post is very recognizable. Actually I would only stay 1 hour after the meeting, but instead I spent the whole day there and talked to her about several topics.
> 
> We started a bit “cold”, but once my ice was broken....haha. She really brought me out of my shell. The conversations we had were pretty intense and I found out that she does things entirely different then I would do. I told her that and that made the whole conversation even more interesting. For example: there were some people around us and she starts to goof around a bit in a way that I would never dare to do.... she made some jokes that I really found funny. On the other hand I noticed that she was a lot more then just a funny person. She’s way more deep then I thought on first sight and she blew me away with some theories about the state and her analysis about people... I was like: “what the hell....” ;-). .. The whole conversation was very intuitive and all felt very “natural”.
> 
> I’m not in love or something, but just want to share this experience with you and point out: ENFP are really fascinating ;-) ..


Can i get an amen and a hallelujah?! lol jk. But i know the feeling, they're just so much fun! I guess its weird and fascinating to us when we finally realize that there are a few people out there that understand us, so that when we finally feel that connection we live and revel in it.
...Idk if Im making any sense.


----------



## Perspicacious

In my personal experience - Chemistry? Yes. Compatibility? Not so much. I have yet to meet an ENFP that I could sustain a healthy romantic relationship with long term. Friendships, however, are usually reasonably nice (this seems to branch out to all Fi/Te Te/Fi types for me).


----------



## INFJcupcake

I was in your shoes for three years and every single time I was around my ENFP the chemistry was undeniable and the happiness and connection was unlike anything I have ever experienced. As INFJs we tend to over analyze things and make a list of "Why it cant/wont work.' throw that list out and take a chance on him I swear to you the love between ENFPs and us INFJs is once in a lifetime experience.

I have dated a lot but no one comes close to a ENFP.


----------



## Devrim

Don't get me wrong,
I love me some ENFP,
But I just don't feel "That" type of emotional "Love" for what they dish out,
I'd much rather here an INTJ rant,
Or an ENTP troll


----------



## Tynen

My heart is currently broken from losing my INFJ... these threads are hard to read...


----------



## khanda

I know 1 male and 2 female ENFPs, and while they are all different from each other, my connection (or chemistry) was almost instant with them all. They're wonderful friends and the energy between us can be intense. The male ENFP is definitely one of my favourite friends and with him I can let loose and talk about anything.. we've really bonded. 
The other female ENFP had a mild crush on me, and I liked her very much too, but didn't have romantic feelings, there wasn't enough of that 'spiritual' depth between us that I'm looking for.. I think she was slightly disappointed that I didn't want to be more than friends, so I decided not to bother her anymore if it makes her uncomfortable, and the connection has faded. I still sometimes miss hanging out with her. 

I'm quite sure I would easily fall in love with an ENFP and even have a long-term relationship if I just met the right one. Intelligence, looks, moral values, enneagram, etc. play a big part, so the MBTI-type alone doesn't say everything about (romantic) compatibility, but the connection/chemistry between INFJ and ENFP does seem to work naturally.


@Tynen 
Sorry to hear about your loss, I hope your wounds heal quickly..and remember, there might be another INFJ out there waiting for you already  So just hang in there buddy..the pain will go away.


----------



## ashestohope

ENFP/INFJ is INTOXICATING. I see zero reason to fight it


----------



## Nothing1

I've never met an ENFP to my knowledge. Actually, I don't think I've met any NFs, but I don't try to meet anyone. I wonder how enneagram type factors into this attraction between INFJ/ENFP. Unless the ENFP were an enneagram 8, I don't think I'd be too interested. ENTPs hold my interest more than ENFPs (from what I've gathered, that is). Again, I think it's because of my enneagram, which is 5w6. 

Another variant is Socionics, which pairs the INFJ with the ESTP. 

I find type compatibility difficult and confusing. At this point, I'm just staying single, less headache.


----------



## DeepenThought

Speaking as a male INFJ, the most troublesome shoals I've run aground on were (in retrospect) INFPs. This isn't to say the love of my life couldn't be an INFP, but I'm just playing probabilities here. The ENFP women I've known would probably have had a lot of chemistry; the particular ones I knew were better as friends, though, because of various other incompatibilities. If I met an ENFP lady that had commonalities on core beliefs, I think we would complement each other well.


----------

