# Getting Restless



## Bassmasterzac (Jun 6, 2014)

I'm really pissed at my life right now.

I've lost all my self-confidence, my ambitious drive, my social skills... Now, I have absolutely nothing. I have no faith in myself to accomplish anything, or even carry myself. I have so many plans for things I'd like to do, yet I can't bring myself to go anywhere in life. I can't even get myself a job and I'm broke.

I used to be carefree and had a passion for life. I thought I could accomplish ANYTHING if I wanted to. I would say, "LOOKOUT WORLD! CAUSE I'M COMING AFTER YOU!" There was no obstacle that could stand in my way. Now, my body just feels limp despite having energy and it feels like there is a mental block that is keeping me from doing ANYTHING productive with my life.

Friends would come easy to me and I was very social. Now, I'm awkward, constantly nervous even around close friends and family... sometimes I can't even speak up. It's pathetic and embarrassing.

I had a lot of friends, always people to hang out with. Now, my friends are dropping one-by-one out of my world. Some of my closest friends don't even pick up the phone or invite me anywhere. A lot of them have lost respect for me too - I don't know why.

I'm as grown up as I have ever been, yet I feel less of a man than I ever was. I've tried many things to improve my life and get my motivation and confidence back, but it never does. I even have my moments of clarity where everything makes sense and I get excited about regaining my lost traits, but nothing ever changes, really.

I'm officially lost. Just drifting away. 

I think I know how to make all of this go away... but the irony is that I need my confidence and my drive to accomplish that... so, I'm stuck in a vicious cycle that just won't stop no matter what I try.

Ehhhh /endrant


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## Pifanjr (Aug 19, 2014)

Have you visited a doctor yet?


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## Bassmasterzac (Jun 6, 2014)

@Pifanjr No way man. Why would a doc be relevant?


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## Pifanjr (Aug 19, 2014)

Bassmasterzac said:


> @Pifanjr No way man. Why would a doc be relevant?


Or a therapist, since they might find a cause for your sudden change. You sound like you might have a depression.


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## Coburn (Sep 3, 2010)

Do you know what caused the change?


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## Bassmasterzac (Jun 6, 2014)

Pifanjr said:


> Or a therapist, since they might find a cause for your sudden change. You sound like you might have a depression.


I went through a major depressive episode for about a year. I wouldn't say I'm depressed anymore... unless I'm experiencing residual symptoms, but I think there is a cycle of things feeding into each other.



Pilot said:


> Do you know what caused the change?


Yes, a chain of events leading up to almost a year of hell for me.


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## Pifanjr (Aug 19, 2014)

Alright, what's the minimum you can still accomplish? Can you manage to get out of bed and get dressed every day? Do you still do your groceries?


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## Glory (Sep 28, 2013)

Stop moping around and butch up, you weenie! Even in defeat, smile, smile, smile!


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## aendern (Dec 28, 2013)

Have you considered quitting drugs?


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## Bassmasterzac (Jun 6, 2014)

Pifanjr said:


> Alright, what's the minimum you can still accomplish? Can you manage to get out of bed and get dressed every day? Do you still do your groceries?


Yeah, I don't think I'm depressed anymore, but it still seems that things are missing and I'm running out of energy


Glory said:


> Stop moping around and butch up, you weenie! Even in defeat, smile, smile, smile!


Haha you're right. thanks for the laugh


emberfly said:


> Have you considered quitting drugs?


Nah, those arent the issue


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## Pifanjr (Aug 19, 2014)

It could be dopamine deficiency. I recently looked at it because I have a lot of trouble getting motivated for anything. There could be any number of physical causes though and it could just be a temporary mental thing. Good to hear you don't feel (as) depressed anymore though.


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## darthvader92 (Jun 4, 2015)

well you are sad and want to be happy but don't list why you are sad, so my advice is go do happy things










.....


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## ShadowsRunner (Apr 24, 2013)

Maybe you have to find yourself!

time for self-reflection, and perhaps experimenting.


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## ShadowsRunner (Apr 24, 2013)

Also, it's normal to go through periods where you may feel somewhat down, or 'depressed' 

When it's not clinical, then oftentimes it passes eventually. 

Sometimes it just happens. I have read in books that generally, it is seen as sign for change and self-reflection, and can be very self-renewing and regenerative.


Or you know, "TakEz TEh dRuGz, and a hAppY mEalz, Big mac, and FriEz" since we're not human-beings, we're autonomous doing-machines, working frantically for our fascist slave corporatocracy


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## Bassmasterzac (Jun 6, 2014)

Pifanjr said:


> It could be dopamine deficiency. I recently looked at it because I have a lot of trouble getting motivated for anything. There could be any number of physical causes though and it could just be a temporary mental thing. Good to hear you don't feel (as) depressed anymore though.


I'm diggin this because that's my theory. It makes plenty of sense for me too. Thanks man



darthvader92 said:


> well you are sad and want to be happy but don't list why you are sad, so my advice is go do happy things
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Solid, but easier said than done when all your friends are boring and you have no money to do anything fun




GhostShadow said:


> Also, it's normal to go through periods where you may feel somewhat down, or 'depressed'
> 
> When it's not clinical, then oftentimes it passes eventually.
> 
> ...


It was clinical for almost a year along with a nervous breakdown... I'm still licking my wounds, but it's hard to recover when you're missing the necessities to happiness and success... 

Sure, I've lost also lost a sense of identity... I used to be COMPLETELY grounded in myself and had it ALL figured out. Now, it's like the iceberg has been tipped again. I'm really getting tired.


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## Bassmasterzac (Jun 6, 2014)

Pifanjr said:


> It could be dopamine deficiency. I recently looked at it because I have a lot of trouble getting motivated for anything. There could be any number of physical causes though and it could just be a temporary mental thing. Good to hear you don't feel (as) depressed anymore though.


I'm diggin this because that's my theory. It makes plenty of sense for me too. Thanks man



darthvader92 said:


> well you are sad and want to be happy but don't list why you are sad, so my advice is go do happy things
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Solid, but easier said than done when all your friends are boring and you have no money to do anything fun




GhostShadow said:


> Also, it's normal to go through periods where you may feel somewhat down, or 'depressed'
> 
> When it's not clinical, then oftentimes it passes eventually.
> 
> ...


It was clinical for almost a year along with a nervous breakdown... I'm still licking my wounds, but it's hard to recover when you're missing the necessities to happiness and success... 

Sure, I've lost also lost a sense of identity... I used to be COMPLETELY grounded in myself and had it ALL figured out. Now, it's like the iceberg has been tipped again. I'm really getting tired.


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## Pifanjr (Aug 19, 2014)

Your doctor should be able to test it fairly simple.


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## Bassmasterzac (Jun 6, 2014)

Pifanjr said:


> Your doctor should be able to test it fairly simple.


Lol do tell


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## Pifanjr (Aug 19, 2014)

Bassmasterzac said:


> Lol do tell


Dopamine deficiency: A complete guide to low dopamine



> If the symptoms prevail, the patient should share his concern with his doctor. In such case, there are two main lab tests for diagnosing dopamine levels that are.
> 
> Blood test
> Urine test


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## Bassmasterzac (Jun 6, 2014)

Pifanjr said:


> Dopamine deficiency: A complete guide to low dopamine


Awesome article man! Thanks

So, what are you doing right now to fix the issue?


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## Pifanjr (Aug 19, 2014)

Bassmasterzac said:


> Awesome article man! Thanks
> 
> So, what are you doing right now to fix the issue?


I'm trying to get myself to eat fruit everyday and spent some time in the sun, as well as developing a normal sleeping schedule. I'm horrible with schedules and keeping myself to them though, so it hasn't been going that well.


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