# How to get over people dictating your identity or misjudging you?



## Openyourmind (Jan 13, 2016)

Lunacik said:


> Openyourmind said:
> 
> 
> > I didn't realize you edited your post. I do agree with you. self-improvement and reflection is excellent, but we have to realize what's accurate and what's unfounded.
> ...


Sorry if I might be misunderstanding a joke.  The woman that called me gay is 32. Her husband was 41. Another reason why she said I was gay, was b/c I didn't share my dating life with her. Her husband was upset that I wasn't attracted to him. 

My other "friend"that commented on my sexuality was a 50-year old sexual abuse survivor, who is also married. I understand that both women may have had life circumstances that may have not matured them. 

I know I might be immature for worrying what others think. I'm a professional 30-something woman too. Any feedback in this thread is appreciated by me very much. Assault on identity is just a trigger for me.


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## Endologic (Feb 14, 2015)

Both of the examples sound kind of sexual. No offense, but I think you have the reputation of a slut. Negative reputations are hard to destroy. Good luck on that one.


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## Openyourmind (Jan 13, 2016)

Emologic said:


> Both of the examples sound kind of sexual. No offense, but I think you have the reputation of a slut. Negative reputations are hard to destroy. Good luck on that one.


I think there's evidence to refute this, considering that others have also also called me a prude, a virgin, sexually restrained and being unhealthy for going without sex. If one person thinks you're a slut and another person thinks you're an uptight prude, how can we determine what the general reputation is? 

Two of those women also live in different states. Their views may not be reflective of how people in my current city see me.

I'm also on an exclusive relationship with a man that doesn't see me as a slut. If I were truly seen as a slut by the masses, he wouldn't be dating me.


Anyways, thank you for helping me realize that maybe it's not best to post on here. I don't need to hear you on how everyone thinks I'm a slut, and then hear someone else calling me a prudish lesbian. 

Have a great day.


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## Caveman Dreams (Nov 3, 2015)

If someone wants to try and dictate my identity crack on., I will look for their weak points and trigger points, and systematically destroy them. I know how to be a c**t. There are exceptions to being yourself.

If someone misjudges me, so what. I am what I am, what some thinks or does not think, does not change that fact.


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