# My ESTP is losing interest...



## goodgracesbadinfluence (Feb 28, 2011)

Infrared said:


> He says that he doesn't want her back, they have been divorced for 3+ years. But according to him, the reason they aren't together right now, is because of her. She is the one that doesn't want him back. But what's going to happen in the future? I don't want to end up staying with him, on the facet of hope that I have that this may work out, for it to all end in the future if she changes her mind and wants him back. If she were to call him right now and say she wanted him back, he'd go running into her arms I'd imagine.
> 
> I can't help but to feel like I'll never be good enough. I'll never live up to _her_. It's like I'm the second choice, the settlement, off-brand of sorts, because he can't have what it is that he really wants. I don't think I can live with that feeling.
> 
> ...


Before I say anything about the issue, I just can't resist telling you that this is exactly the same way I would handle the situation and how I would react to it all. I don't know if it helps you knowing that, in theory, you're not completely alone. 

Could you ask him point-blank what would happen if she wanted him back, or would that just cause you more anguish? And I also think you should discuss the feelings of being the second choice with him as well and why it gets to you so badly. He may not even know you have them. 

Why do you _have_ _to_ deal with her every Wednesday night?


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