# Self discovery is hard. Need help



## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

These two tests are good

Personality Type Slider Test

Free Personality Test | Personality Type Test | Find who you are


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

[/B]Auxiliary Ne (INXP): Your life has so much potential! I can see many different possibilities for your future! Let me share them with you! There is more than one way to look at this situation. It would be a shame not to talk about them all. That’s a great idea, but what about this? Or this? Or that? Let’s discuss and consider them all. I have an analogy that fits this situation, but you’ll have to hang in there to the end, because at first it will sound random. I promise, it isn’t! Let me paint the big picture for you! Let’s try this, it’s new and it’s crazy but it might work! Yes, I thought you might make that decision / that this would happen. Excuse me, I need to write a story…

I have not bothered much to see the potential of people around me. As I have got closer to people I have started devaluing them. Only few people are there in my life whom i truly like and want to spend my time with. I hardly share my ideas with others and also I don't think I see many possibilities. Whenever someone presents an idea i usually tend to find the negatives in it and if I am sure the other person won't take offense I present my views. I am more forthright about my negative observations with my parents as I am closer to them. 

Tertiary Si (INXP): I do keep things that I collected when I was a child, but I do not look at them when I am upset and I am not as attached to those items as i was when i was a child. Most of my feelings regarding such collections are numb. I sometimes tend to find certain tastes and smells similar to what I experienced before, but my mom who is a strong sensor disagrees on it and other people find my suggestions weird. I get weird looks when I mention it. 

As for ISFP
Auxiliary Se (ISXP): I have very low energy to act upon anything in the outside world. I like to spend as much time as i can in my head and there is a inner resistance that i feel whenever i have to 'Do' something in the external world.

Tertiary Ni (ISXP):I love the silence. I like imagining and creating plots in my head and having conversations. I like symbolism, archetypes, and mysteries. I find them interesting.( true ) I sometimes feel like I know what is going to happen, before it happens… and I’m usually right. the really weird thing is that sometimes I wish strongly for something to happen and it happens. I don't know if i am just lucky or if this is God's work however these are really small things overall like wishing for heavy downpour so that i avoid going somewhere i didn't want to go or wishing a teacher were absent, or feeling like something bad will happen and it happens. But i don't cause downpour if there are no clouds in the sky, so conditions apply:laughing:


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Childhood Struggles 

I was sensitive to hurt.They are easily hurt by real or perceived insensitivity, and they can become very irrational in response to this. They can feel insecure and as if they are betrayed by those they hold dear. In order to protect themselves, they have a tendency to hold grudges and have a hard time forgiving and forgetting. They are introverted feelers, which means they are very aware of their own feelings; but have a harder time understanding feelings that are foreign to them. For this reason, they can often be hurt by things that weren’t meant to be hurtful at all.- this INFP childhood trait applies

ISFP childhood 
They tend to only place importance on the practical and immediate needs, and often feel misunderstood or looked over in school settings. They can also face parents who are less than pleased with their academic performance or their personal pursuits. They may feel that they are never “good enough” to please the people most important to them. ISFPs can be highly intelligent, but learn best in a hands-on, active learning environment.

I think I have tried to please my parents and teachers too much that a fall in grades was devastating to me. Hence i concentrated on my studies ( though not at a steady pace, i procrastinated a lot because i knew i could pull it off before the exam day, however it always brought too much pressure on me where I cried in frustration. But I usually got good marks )

I used to lose my coloring set and crayons and things like that when I was a small child and my mom used to scold me so much that i began taking care of my things. I don't think I have lost items in my pre teen or teenage years. I later realised that I actually did not lose my crayon sets but a gang of girls used to steal it from my as well as other children's bags.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Ah ok. It sounds like you're Se is low, too low to be in you're top two functions. And it also sounds like your Si is low. It also seems like you're Ne is low. So yes, I'm seeing you as a Ni intuitive now.

Does this resonate for you?

Ni
•Focuses on the underlying meaning or potential of a situation, look to understand the “thematic essence” 
•May not have a good sense of what is realistic, create a singular vision based on what they think will happen or what they hope will happen and work towards this
•Desires meaning, understanding, striving towards their idealistic vision, and cultivating hidden potential, intention
•Is motivated by intangible gut feelings, achieving a vague vision of potential
•Appreciates being told that they are profound, understanding, deeply complex, meaningful, seeks understanding
•Conflict with superficiality, shallowness, mindless hedonism, reckless spontaneity
•May be criticized for being overly abstract, unrealistic, over analytical


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

@Kitty23 Thanks for all this info. However I am not able to respond to all these information that fast. Also thanks for reading all my responses so patiently and replying to it. 

What about the ISTP or INTP descriptions? 

ISTPs generally have the following traits: 
• Do not function well in regimented, structured environments; they will either feel stifled or become intensely bored 

• Excellent "trouble-shooters", able to quickly find solutions to a wide variety of practical problems : I am able to do this sometimes. it often comes as a surprise even to myself 
• Results-oriented; they like to see immediate results for their efforts : I am a bit impatient when i don't get the results for my efforts soon enough.
• Usually laid-back and easy-going with people 
• Independent and determined - usually dislike committing themselves 

INTP Traits 
• Love theory and abstract ideas
• Truth Seekers - they want to understand things by analyzing underlying principles and structures : I don't delve into underlying principles too much.
• Value knowledge and competence above all else : I value these qualities in other people, but these are not the only qualities that i want in them.
• Have very high standards for performance, which they apply to themselves : i don't think i apply it to myself too much, or i fret over it so much that i fail.
•eccentric : in my mind
• value autonomy 
• Dislike mundane detail 
• Not particularly interested in the practical application of their work 
• Future-oriented 
• Usually brilliant: people see me as bright but i don't apply myself well.
• Trust their own insights and opinions above others 
• Live primarily inside their own minds, and may appear to be detached and uninvolved with other people


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Do you see yourself as Fi, Ti or neither?

Ti: No one is more qualified to determine the truth than myself.
Fi: No one is more qualified to determine what is morally right than myself. 
Ti has to rationalize. Fi has to reflect. Ti reflects on logic. Fi reflects on morality. 

Ti-Fe types, such as INTP’s, are likely to believe a person must use reason to consider what the correct solution is. They are likely to believe that the solution based on reason is the morally just one. This goes for Fe-Ti (INFJ) to a much lesser degree since the “common good” is prioritized and the reason is secondary. Fe-Ti (INFJ) might use reason to advocate for the common good.

Te-Fi types, such as ISTJ’s and INTJ’s are likely to believe that a person can discern what is morally correct through objective facts and by reflecting upon individualized principles. They are likely to believe that the best solution is the solution represented by facts outside of them. Fi-Te (INFP’s) has this to a lesser degree. They are no less capable, but they prioritize the “rightness” discovered within themselves. They make appeals to facts in the outside world.

Do you see yourself as Te or Ti? 

Introverted Thinking- Ti is all about classifying things. It likes to give them names and put them in little boxes. Extraverted thinking- Te is more conceptual. It looks at how things relate to one another. So while introverted thinking focuses on separating things into their unique parts, extraverted thinking focuses on organizing things into a unified whole. Ti is subjective and private. You can see the Ti user’s results but not hear their thinking process. Ti is never stumped by a problem, but will instead find some way to “rig it” and solve it. Stuck in a room? Ti will find a way out.
Extraverted Thinking- Te always is objective. It also gets stumped by the facts if there is no obvious, logical solution. Locked in a room with no way out? Te can’t fix it. But Te can make a crap-load of money and knows how to plan for success.

Te gets sh!t done. Ti wants to know what sh!t is.
Te is objective reasoning. The car is blue. 
Ti is subjective reasoning. How does a car work? 
Telling them apart … depends on where they are in the functional stack.

Te as 1st function- Te-dom? The boss in the room. The planner. The organizer. Big money maker. Driven to success. Annoyed by “lazy” people.
Ti as first function- Ti-dom? Not the boss in the room. The guy in the corner who just took apart something and put it back together. Or sat listening to your argument and then dismantled it with one well-placed logical question. The problem solver who laughs when other people are stumped. 

Te as second function- Aux-Te? Blunt. To the point. Motivated to accomplish. Natural planner. Can tell other people what to do and how to do it. Expects results. Motivated by money and success… but not inclined to be “the boss” unless forced.
Ti as second function- Aux-Ti? Problem solver. Doesn’t see any factual impasse as troubling. Quietly analyzes a situation and does something about it. Isn’t motivated by success so much as deeper understanding. 

Te as third function- Tert-Te? Fi controls it and dampens it, but it’s still blunt. Motivated to do stuff. Make plans. Organize their environment and other people. Bossiness. 
Ti as third function- Tert-Ti? Self-analyzes and sharpens Fe, but Fe dominates it. More interested in knowing why something happened than in organizing the external world. 

Te as 4th function- Inferior-Te? Weak. Under-developed. Can become obstinate and dig in its heels when Fi is pushed too far or challenged. Turns blunt if annoyed. Finds satisfaction from productivity and motivates the user to complete task. The user has a tendency to be bossy and controlling if Te is used too much.
Ti as 4th function- Inferior Ti? Weak. Under-developed. Can become intensely critical of others’ logic and self-conscious if Fe is battered around. Gets angry and defensive if forced into a corner. Unconcerned with financial gain.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Ni
•*Focuses on the underlying meaning or potential of a situation, look to understand the “thematic essence” *: I look for a common theme to explain a situation and try to find an underlying meaning for why something happened.

•*May not have a good sense of what is realistic, create a singular vision based on what they think will happen or what they hope will happen and work towards this:* I am not realistic in my conclusions regarding some matters to my detriment. but I don't change my views, I am a bit stubborn regarding it. Also when i visualise the outcome of something, it is limited to one or two probable possibilities than a very large number and i obsess over it again and again.

•*Desires meaning, understanding, striving towards their idealistic vision, and , intention* : I do want things to be meaningful to me and i want to understand things. what does it mean by 'cultivating hidden potential'

•*Is motivated by intangible gut feelings, achieving a vague vision of potential*
Usually when i push myself to complete a task like study something

•*Appreciates being told that they are profound, understanding, deeply complex, meaningful, seeks understanding*: 
I think a lot of people appreciate being told that they are profound and complex. Sometimes people go out of their ways to prove it which i dislike.

•*Conflict with superficiality, shallowness, mindless hedonism, reckless spontaneity*
I do not like people trying to acquire every material aspect and boasting about it. ( who are you showing off to). Also though i don't mind people being a bit superficial ( as in saying something and doing something different, not completely opposite ) , everyone is, I especially dislike those who do not acknowledge this aspect of them and acting as if they are completely oblivious to it. Atleast explain your action with reasons and take responsibility. If not wanting to admit in public, then take steps to not portray oneself as so self righteous the next time.

•*May be criticized for being overly abstract, unrealistic, over analytical*
I am criticised for being unrealistic, and being cynical. also sometimes being too emotional due to unrealistic expectations.


Sometimes Ni function traits and descriptions are a bit vague and over the top. It gives a feel that the descriptions of other functions are simplistic when compared to Ni function descriptions. Also results in the difficulty related to identifying its presence in the psyche when everyday behaviours and actions are taken into consideration. However this is how I feel and it may or may not be true.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

I have trouble deciding whether I use Te or Ti based on descriptions provided. I thought about how i may have employed these functions in the past. I think both functions involve logically organising things however the logic they use is different. I have noticed that when I have to arrange a pile of things in front of me, like a pile of clothes, i first neatly fold and keep all the pants in one stack, then i turn to shirts and likewise i divide the whole task in categories. It takes time and is not so efficient, my mom says just do it in the order it comes, like neatly fold the clothes your hand can grab, but i find it more satisfying doing it this way. Also while answering question papers I tend to go from first to last question, from one word answers to essays rather than attempting essays first. Others attempt the tough essays first so that they don't have to hurry at last. So is this more Ti or Te


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Well, I think the question is Do you just want to use something, make things happen, and create order in your external world? Have you ever been told your bossy? Or do you want to understand how something works and trouble-shoot? 

Like me, I don't really care about how something works, I want to know what I can do with it. 

How about what fictional characters do you identity with?


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

@ Kitty23. Thanks for suggesting these tests. they are different from normal tests in that you have a thiird option ' I am really in between' and a slider so there is greater flexibility in choice. Also I took these tests for the first time hence my responses were 'fresh' as in i saw these choices for the first time.:happy: 

results are 

Personality Type Slider Test
Your personality type is:

INTJ
Independent, goal-oriented, and resolute, you tend to have very clear notions about how the abstract ideas that you nurture in your head should be turned into reality. Once you have determined what needs to be done you throw yourself at the problem with an unyielding decisiveness that thinks little of other people's skepticism and reservations. Being extremely independent and strong-willed, you tend to simply ignore it when people protest that your plan is "impossible." Living in a world of ideas and strategic planning as you do, others rarely have the prerequisites, intelligence, or competence to offer solid correctives to your plans anyway. They rarely plan ahead and optimize as extensively as you do, so it is natural that they won't understand the full magnitude and importance of your schemes until you actually carry them out and convince the world otherwise.

Free Personality Test | Personality Type Test | Find who you are

Your personality type is I N F J !

Introverted (I) 79%	Extraverted (E) 21%
Intuitive (N) 59%	Sensing (S) 41%
Feeling (F) 65%	Thinking (T) 35%
Judging (J) 59%	Perceiving (P) 41%


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

My Personality slider test strength of preferences are 
INTJ
I >E by 30%
N >S by 25%
T > F by 5% 
J > P by 15% 
Strength of Result


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

I have been told that I am stubborn and appear bossy because I like to have some sort of control over my environment if I am really invested in something. I also don't delve much into how a thing works, what matters more is its functionality. Sometimes I do feel like I should know about things in depth, like how a car really works on the inside but I just never put in the effort.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

"I have been told that I am stubborn and appear bossy because I like to have some sort of control over my environment if I am really invested in something. I also don't delve much into how a thing works, what matters more is its functionality. Sometimes I do feel like I should know about things in depth, like how a car really works on the inside but I just never put in the effort." That is Te!!! you prefer Te!!! Yay you prefer Te over Ti


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

I think you are either an INTJ or INFJ. I just looked back at all of your answers/this thread, and out of all the 16 types those two you have provided the most evidence for.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Ha Ha. Now someone's excited that i prefer Te over Ti. But the thing is INTJ's are described as highly logical. I don't know if I actually am that logical. Hey you are an ISTJ with aux Te. How would you describe your use of Te.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Ya it seems i could be INFJ or INTJ. However Ni descriptions are... well abstract. Do you know any INTJ or INFJ's like could you tell me how they come across to you.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

My Te- When talking I get straight to the point, my voice is monotone, I can tell you the exact time I'll arrive somewhere, I love making goals and To- do-it lists, my room is spotless, I like deadlines, I can organize my time very well to do everything I want to do, when getting things done I put aside my emotions. I like to make things happen. I get a high from accomplishing goals. I wanted to go to college so I made it happen. I like things to run smoothly and efficiently. I hate making the same mistake twice. When someone says they're going to talk about three topics but I notice when they only talk about two topics. I like making decisions based on what's rational. When I as a kid I was the leader in our friends group. Telling the rules, making sure people play fair, making sure the game is running smoothly. 

'Ya it seems i could be INFJ or INTJ. However Ni descriptions are... well abstract. Do you know any INTJ or INFJ's like could you tell me how they come across to you." 

My best friend is an INFJ. She is a bit more touchy feely than I am. She is both logical and a feeler-most INFJ's are, that's why their so unique. When I am upset she feels my feelings and says "Aww" and her body language expresses her empathy for me. Her voice is more animated than mine and body language is confident but more fluid and softer looking than mine. She is bit more "fluffy" than I am. She doesn't need to put her self in my shoes to feel my pain. She is a very hard worker but it is a bit more difficult for her to organize her schedule than for me. I get energized from organizing, she does not. She's good at organizing, but she gets more drained from it and isn't as natural for her as it is for me. I have more of a natural talent for organizing than she does. But just to make it clear Te is like a natural ability, it's there but it doesn't mean you feel the need to use it 24/7. I don't live on a strict schedule or make my bed at 8:00 am every day, like stereotypical ISTJ's. I know ISTJ's and they don't live on a strict schedule either. But the Te is still there, it nags at you, especially if you've been neglecting it. So when you compare a high using Te person ISTJ like me with my high using Fe friend you can see the difference.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Thanks for providing such good examples of Te. I am normally relaxed in the sense that I don't make to-do lists or keep my room that tidy. However I don't like 'clutter' whether it be my table or computer desktop and I arrange things neatly when I feel 'restricted' by the clutter. When I have to accomplish a goal I make plans in my head as to how I should proceed, however in my attempt to start perfectly I don't start the project and only when things pile up to a certain extent do I feel the 'motivation' to start and get into the 'JUST DO IT' mode. If I have to go somewhere like an appointment or meeting I get up way early in the morning and get ready early. It seems I don't have a good grasp over the way time flows but I am also not as relaxed as EP's and IP's are described. 

I think I am facing trouble to type myself because I am more introverted than is good for me and hence have not used my auxiliary function much so I think the development of my functions has been slow. What is your opinion on socionics description of creative functions ( auxiliary function in mbti ) or maybe Beebe's model of auxiliary being the good parent. I should look over them and decide what I use.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Right. So let's just rule out perceiver types. Let's stick to you being a IXXJ. 

I've heard a lot of times you switch the last letter in socionics. Like if your socioncs type is INFp then you are an INFJ in myers briggs. Not all of the time though. 

I think socionics is good. I don't know anything about Beebe's model though.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Yeah I do procrastinate a lot but like i said, i procrastinate because i have no motivation sometimes or i want to start things on a perfect note in a not so perfect world. so do you know any articles or theory wherein they discuss how sometimes too much seclusion of an introvert leads to a weak or not as developed auxiliary. Cause i think that may be interfering with my coming to a conclusion. 

Also I have noticed that when i have to interact with people closely I tend to act in a very different way. I sometimes absorb their viewpoints and mannerisms of speech, and walk and sometimes even handwriting, though not with all people, only those I find interesting and want to know more about. So i meld myself in a way that i its like i don't have a fixed personality among people. Its constantly changing among people and sometimes leads to frustration.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Also another weird thing about me is that from time to time I indulge in creating plots in my head which make me feel such intense negative emotions like anger and pain. Its intense but also controlled, in a good way, like I can control my crying or anger and such episodes make me feel 'alive'. I think it is a mechanism my psyche employs to make up for the lack of closeness with other people. I listen to songs which fit my mood and keeps me in the zone for a few hours. However these episodes are more of a cleansing routine for me rather than being totally negative. My feelings are uncontrolled when I am affected by the external world, when I am not the one driving it.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

> I sometimes absorb their viewpoints and mannerisms of speech, and walk and sometimes even handwriting, though not with all people, only those I find interesting and want to know more about. So i meld myself in a way that i its like i don't have a fixed personality among people. Its constantly changing among people and sometimes leads to frustration.


This kind of sounds like Fe. 

Fe
•	Focuses on others’ wellbeing/harmony, societal guidelines for morality, and how these things form their collective moral code
•	Would rather maintain collective harmony and look for ways for everyone to compromise and agree than incite disagreement
•	Desires harmony, agreement, community, kindness, supporting/helping others
•	Is motivated by a desire to help others, make meaningful connections and relationships, feel accepted and appreciated
•	Appreciates being told that they are appreciated, well-liked, kind, helpful, supportive, compassionate
•	Conflict with blunt and uncaring criticisms, not considering others, rudeness
•	May be criticized for being fake, manipulative, changing their morals to fit the situation

So would you say you absorb other's emotions/feelings? 

INFJ’s have Fe, extroverted feeling, as their auxiliary function. They are interested in how other people are feeling, good at empathizing and caring when other people are hurt, and sometimes confused about how they feel unless they talk to other people about it. They are sometimes seen as “extroverted introverts” since their Fe makes them interested in cultivating their relationships with close friends. They are very willing to help those around them and care about how they are doing. Although they may be more reserved about expressing their emotions than an extrovert, they like to discuss how they are feeling with others, and don’t like to process their emotions by themselves. *They make emotional decisions based on how the group feels, taking into account the values and beliefs of those around them, and not their individual emotions. They can also change their behavior fairly easily to fit into various groups if they wish, understanding other people innately.
*


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Yes, in times of emotional turmoil when I have to make certain decisions on how I should proceed I ask other people, my parents or friends, not in the sense of just asking them straight but sharing what the conflict or the situation is making me feel. I get a sense of relief when i open up in this way and hear their viewpoints on it. but I do not want others to force me to choose a path, ultimate the decision has to be mine. 

Also about being in a negative feeling zone thing, what do you think about it. Is it negative Fi use. The weird thing is that just as intensely as i feel during those times after it is over I sort of feel numb. Its like a release of some sorts. Do you think that it is some sort of abnormal behaviour?


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

> Also another weird thing about me is that from time to time I indulge in creating plots in my head which make me feel such intense negative emotions like anger and pain. Its intense but also controlled, in a good way, like I can control my crying or anger and such episodes make me feel 'alive'. I think it is a mechanism my psyche employs to make up for the lack of closeness with other people. I listen to songs which fit my mood and keeps me in the zone for a few hours. However these episodes are more of a cleansing routine for me rather than being totally negative. My feelings are uncontrolled when I am affected by the external world, when I am not the one driving it.
> 
> Also about being in a negative feeling zone thing, what do you think about it. Is it negative Fi use. The weird thing is that just as intensely as i feel during those times after it is over I sort of feel numb. Its like a release of some sorts. Do you think that it is some sort of abnormal behaviour?


I don't think that's a function thing. I think that's just your personal preference for releasing pent up feelings/emotions which is healthy. So no, I don't think that is abnormal behavior. 



> I indulge in creating plots in my head which make me feel such intense negative emotions like anger and pain.


Can you explain more about this though? Plots towards/about who or what, or something else?


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Well it is sort of an intimate pastime of mine and it may seem silly to you and everyone reading it.:blushed: 
I create characters, form images and create a central theme. I play out conversations with these characters in my head wherein we go through some tragic experiences... its difficult to put it in words as the stories i create are more feeling based rather than like trying to create novels. Sometimes it involves real life people like my friends or my parents and i create scenarios in my head and converse with them and the direction of stories is usually like i share an experience with one of my characters and feel the feelings that would be generated if it were to happen in real life ( it is all in my head :blushed: Its difficult to explain in words. 

I am sure that by now you must be thinking that I am definitely crazy :|


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Oh ok now I understand! No, don't worry if others think it's silly!  No, I don't think you're crazy. 


> the direction of stories is usually like i share an experience with one of my characters and feel the feelings that would be generated if it were to happen in real life ( it is all in my head Its difficult to explain in words.


 Kind of sounds like Fi 

What fictional characters do you relate to? Has anyone ever said you act just like this character?


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

I don't think I relate to any fictional character strongly. If I read a novel which is mostly written in pov of one character I kind of identify myself with that character as long as it is through its pov. If there are pov of other characters I identify with them too. I am gripped by the emotion contained in the novel as it progresses feeling things along with the central character. I am more influenced by movies wherein there is an interplay of actions along with music in the background that justifies the feelings involved in the scene.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Also no one has commented that I act like a particular character. If someone has to make out a similarity then they should be familiar with it too. However most people I know are not as interested in the novels i read and films i watch. I am more interested in English novels and films and songs but most of my friends are not.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Thanks Kitty for being so supportive in typing me. Thank you for all the info you have provided till now. Do i seem difficult in the sense that I am taking a long time to come to conclusion. :sad:

'I think I use Fe' in my interactions with people but indulge in Fi in my lone time. :frustrating:


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

You're welcome!


> If I read a novel which is mostly written in pov of one character I kind of identify myself with that character as long as it is through its pov. If there are pov of other characters I identify with them too. I am gripped by the emotion contained in the novel as it progresses feeling things along with the central character. I am more influenced by movies wherein there is an interplay of actions along with music in the background that justifies the feelings involved in the scene.


That makes me think you're a feeler. I might have asked you this before, I want to ask it again. Do you relate to Fe or Fi better naturally? What feeling type comes to you first? Fe or Fi? 

Fe- wants to end slavery because they absorb the slaves emotions of pain and suffering. It's not based on ethics. It's based on feeling others emotions. 

Fi- wants to end slavery because slavery goes against their values. Slavery is simply "wrong." They use a moral code. 

Fe- is against adultery because it will hurt my loved ones. They feel the pain their going to cause to others. 

Fi- is against adultery because it goes against their moral code. Their heart says "This is wrong." 

Both Fi and Fe are very empathetic, but approach empathy in two different ways. *They both feel other's suffering but their tactics are different. Fi user's put themselves in those person's shoes. When empathizing a Fi user will relate by speaking of their own similar struggle. Fe users absorb the person's raw emotions. When empathizing the Fe user will say "Oh no," and "Aww." 

*Fe one big motivation= feeling/absorbing other's emotions
Fi one big motivation= following their own ethics


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

I sort of come off as bubbly when I meet new people and generally give off a cheerful vibe. When I have conflict with someone and experience strong negative emotions because of the conflict, even though I don't want to cry or show my emotions to someone else and I try hard to control and keep it all in, it comes out when people ask a few questions, like 'what happened ?'. If they keep pressing I eventually cave in. I like it when someone is there to listen to me rambling when I am such a state and just be there. I am not looking for advice, I am looking for some support through just being there for me. 

I know this is not a straightforward answer to your question. Could you give me another example which portrays the difference between Fe and Fi and not in terms of empathy. Like i empathise more easily with the misfortunes of strangers than my friends and family. If something bad happened to someone I have known for a while, I try to find a reason for why it may have happened and see their own actions to be responsible for their misery. I don't say it to their faces for the fear of hurting them and go through the motions of being 'Oh no' and show sadness in my face but at the same time I know it doesn't come from within and is thus it feels fake to me while I am doing it. but I don't press them too much. I get uncomfortable in such situations and just leave them on their own for a while.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

"The moment you say that you don't care about harmony and you care about how you feel more then it's Fi over Fe." 

"I do tend to have a "I don't do this and that because I believe it is wrong" more.-Fi 

"Dr. Phil is an ESTJ-Te-Fi. If you want classic hard-knocks Te-telling-people-off, go watch some of his interview clips on YouTube. This one is the first one I ran across, and it’s hilarious how he responds… total Te. THESE ARE THE FACTS. Here is another clip where he asserts just who is boss, whose show it is, what they are going to talk about, and where he stands with a guest. 

Oprah is a Fe-dom (likely ESFJ-Fe-Ti, though she’s typed ENFJ a lot online). I tried to find the James Frey original interview with Oprah where she really nailed him (as she puts it, she was attacking him not only for herself, but “the millions of people who read your book and thought it was real”) but I can’t seem to locate it. Boo. But here’s a quick clip with Lindsay Lohan where she lays down the Fe. Basically, cut your BS, get your act together, etc. But it also comes with Fe: you’re better than this, I know you can do it, you have a good heart." 

"Firstly, Fe-users are more expressive emotionally and “invested in the object,” unable to detach from it and therefore more likely to be touched by it and cry. He includes himself in this, since even as a child (and still as an adult) he tended to cry far more often than his INFP friend, who never cried. His wife, an ENFP-Fi, also rarely cries. Inward emotions. Detached from the situation at hand – sympathetic, but not empathetic in that the sadness of what is happening bleeds into them in the way it does a Fe-user, even a low-order Fe-user.

He does say that he is more Fe than many other INTPs, which just goes to prove that our functions dictate our brain process but not our behavior pattens. Another friend was unconvinced at first that he was an INTP himself due to his highly emotional state as a child. Bottom line is this: NTPs can often be much more externally emotional than INFPs.

Secondly, Fe-users are drawn to emotional arcs in stories. This definitely stood out to me when reading about ENTP childhood development – often, their favorite part of the movie is the most dramatic “reveal.” They will re-watch that scene again and again, and sometimes act it out. (I totally did this as a kid.) This is both due to their analytical interest in emotions and the excitement of feeling the receiving individual emote. This is very true for me. If a story has no deeply emotional arc, I abandon it. Didn’t fall in love with The 10th Kingdom until we found out who the queen was. Where other people say, “Oh my gosh, that’s TERRIBLE to do that to that character!” I go, “Oooh, a chance to explore their emotions through a difficult time!” The big emotional reveal is still my favorite part of any film – and I love to watch other people respond to it too. (I think my ISFJ friend is still slightly mad that I didn’t tell her about the twist at the end of Breaking Dawn Part 2, since I wanted to see her react to all the deaths. Hah!)

Everything I write has some grand, traumatic emotional reveal, ala “I am your father, Luke!” INTP says he’s the same way. But his ENFP wife isn’t like that. Her taste in drama is eclectic and random. We (INTP and I) both approach it from a “what message can we say through this story?” but her stories all have meaning because she’s writing them. No intended theme, no real goal, their writing just happens naturally. (Again, unlike mine. I’m always challenging moral concepts and asking my characters to overcome emotional roadblocks, because I find it fascinating to help them work through their feelings… Ti-Fe?)"

Thirdly, Ne and Fe like to share their interests with others. NFPs are less this way. Their interests are personal and self-fulfilling so they have no real desire to connect through their interests with others.(I always get very excited when I encounter something new, or learn something new, and want to share it with others. I am devastated and get depressed if I can’t talk about what I love with other people who love it… or if I can talk about it, but only with people who don’t seek an objective perspective on it. Right now, I’m in a moody slump because none of my friends watch any of the same television shows I do; hence, I have no one to discuss them with. WAH!)

He says, “Fe and Ne … has this need to push it out… to share our interest, which is no small part of the annoying nerd stereotype, which I embody and my NTP cohorts do as well. NFPs do not have this trait…”


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

“Fe and Ne … has this need to push it out… to share our interest, which is no small part of the annoying nerd stereotype, which I embody and my NTP cohorts do as well. NFPs do not have this trait…” 

I do not tell people of my interests as well because my interests are weird and I know most people would not be interested in it and will think I am crazy. I have shared my interests before and it has not gone well. People just look at me like I am weird and with sympathy  

I am also more emotionally expressive. I don't know. I think i'll take a day off to read through functions again and determine what I really use. Do you know of any good descriptions of functions and are socionics descriptions okay to be referred to.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Yeah I think you should take a day off to clear your head or else you'll just confuse yourself more and see yourself too much in all of the types, instead of just your true type. 

Good descriptions of the Jungian cognitive functions:

Cognitive Functions - Funky MBTI in Fiction

Cognitive Functions - A Simple Explanation

How To Recognize Each Myers-Briggs Personality Type In Real Life | Thought Catalog

Understanding the 8 Jungian Cognitive Processes (8 Functions)

Understanding the Myers Briggs Type Indicator: The 8 Cognitive Functions

Why Personality Hacker Uses Nicknames For The 8 Jungian Cognitive Functions - Personality Hacker : Personality Hacker

INTPsâ€™ Introverted Thinking (Ti) vs. INTJsâ€™ Extraverted Thinking (Te)

Introverted Feeling (Fi) vs. Introverted Thinking (Ti)

The Ti-Fe & Fi-Te Function Pairs

The Eight Functions (Typology 201)

Extraverted Feeling (Fe)

http://www.personalitycafe.com/articles/63173-fi-vs-fe-101-a.html

http://intjforum.com/showthread.php?t=12446

I think you are probably a Fe user who has just gotten bad reactions from people and so then you thought I better keep this stuff to myself from now on? 

Socionics is a different format. All I know is sometimes you switch the last letter. So if you're a INFJ in mbti then in socionics you're a INFp. 

Just let me if you have any more questions or want to try and type yourself again in near future


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Just in case you're interested here are some Jungian Cognitive Function tests: 

http://keys2cognition.com/explore.htm

Cognitive Function Test

Jungian Cognitive Functions Test


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Thanks Kitty for your help. I wish I had friends as interested in mbti discussions as you. I shall evaluate how I use the functions for some time and then reply you soon in a day or two about it. Key is not to 'Over Analyse' Thanks again:happy:


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

You're welcome. Yes, you'll just confuse yourself more if you analyze yourself too deeply. Alrighty then


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

Hey Kitty I am back. So I went through a period of introspection and reading through lot of articles and tried to remember how I was like when I was a child. and I can safely say that I believe I am an auxiliary Fe user because as an introvert it is this side that I have shown to people more. but because Fe is coupled with a subjective dominant introverted function my use of Fe is somewhat weird. So I am now thinking about only two options Si or Ni dominant. So kitty could you explain how Si function manifests in you. 

I seem to easily recognise faces of actors in movies. When I see a familiar face I think, I have seen that face somewhere and then its not long before I can remember the other show or movie that I have seen them in. but I don't remember their actual names or the names of previous shows. Is it a use of Si function or because I concentrate too much on people's faces, I can't distinguish.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

I thought you were an auxiliary Fe user  So that leaves ISFJ= Si, Fe, Ti, Ne. Or INFJ= Ni, Fe, Ti, Se. 

INFJ vs ISFJ

In theory, INFJs’ emotional expressiveness should be fairly similar to that of ISFJs. After all, both types are Introverts and both use Fe as their auxiliary function. The primary difference is that ISFJs, as Si dominants, are wired to function as guardians and conservators of culture and tradition. INFJs, by contrast, function more like societal prophets and diagnosticians, sensitive to what they perceive as the faults and falsities of their environs. This, along with their strong idealism, can contribute to their critical stance toward the world.

Difference between Si and Ni:

Ni vs Si - Funky MBTI in Fiction

Difference between Si and Se:

What would you say is the difference between si... - Confessions of a Myers Briggs-aholic

3 ways to know if you are not an INFJ: 

Am I an INFJ? 3 Ways to Know if You’re Not – INFJ Blog

Childhood struggles of each myers briggs type: 

The Childhood Struggles of Every Myers Briggs Type - Psychology Junkie

What each function looks like in real life: 

How To Recognize Each Myers-Briggs Personality Type In Real Life | Thought Catalog

What each function loos like based on its position in stack: 

How Each Cognitive Function Manifests Based On Its Position In Your Stacking | Thought Catalog

I'm not 100% sure I use Si. So I'll explain how I think I use Si: I remember names easily. I remember everyone's names I went to elementary school with. I'll naturally think to myself how did I do something like this last time. If it worked last time then I know this method will work again. Which can sometimes make me get stuck in the "tried and true" method instead of experimenting. But I am not too stuck in my ways. I see the details and big picture easily. I can be defensive about preserving cultures and traditions. More so about preserving cultures though. For example, I read a book about an African tribe that practices quite a brutal tradition-murder and Europeans were coming in, leading to the eventual extinction of the tribes culture/tradition. My classmates immediately said that the tribe's culture/tradition is so wrong! And I thought that's the tribes tradition, it is their culture, we should respect it. I mean, I thought yes, murder/the tribe's tradition is wrong according to my own ethics system, but looking at the tribe from afar, I respected their culture and traditions. When a culture dies out, for me it is very sad. I naturally respect others' cultures, I even minored in cultural studies in college, and took a more objective/respectful route than some of my other classmates. I also am very observant of my surroundings. Like when me and my mom go to a restaurant I'll look at the waiters name tag and remember it probably for the rest of my life. Whereas my mom won't even look at the name tag or even look at what people wear and I do. She didn't even notice her sister always wears Tommy Hilfiger clothing brand most of the time and said "Who wears Tommy Hilfiger clothing" and her sister looked embarrassed. I said "Mom how did you not notice that your sister wears Tommy Hilfiger clothing basically all of the time?" Me and her are opposite this way.


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## oblivion7 (Jan 13, 2016)

This is from INFJ Blog 
'For example — an ISFJ and an INFJ work together in a coffee shop. The ISFJ is taught the best way to make a specific drink, and so will make that drink that exact same way every single time. The INFJ, however, will instead remember the general idea of how the drink was made, but won’t be as concerned about measuring out the amount of this or that, and will likely even experiment with the ingredients occasionally. The exception would be if the INFJ felt a lot of pressure to make the drink exactly right, in which case they would focus even more so on doing things as they should be done, which would cause a high level of stress. ISFJs, like other Guardian types, tend to be more task and detail-oriented, whereas INFJs, like other Idealist types, tend to be more idea and big picture-focused.'

I have struggled trying to do things in exactly the same way. I noticed this about me especially in science labs where you have to measure a certain quantity of something, mix it in right manner, make connections between wires in physics experiment involving some electrical circuit, and even if i have done this same task yesterday I would still have nagging doubts in the back of my head like 'am i doing this right'. I also am not able to remember names of my childhood friends. 

The problem I have in accepting that I am an INFJ is that i am not as mystical as INFJ are described. Sometimes things happen in a way i thought it would but its not like i can predict everyday about what will happen. Also 'INFJs’ Ni-Fe pairing make them great counselors. They prefer to help others by helping them understand themselves and offering advice.' I love the idea of helping someone but I don't think I could help someone understand themselves. I have mostly helped my friends in making them understand concepts in class.


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