# Slef-mutilation



## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

I want to join the Navy, but I have some self-inflicted scars on my thighs that are very noticeable. What are my chances of getting in? It was many years ago and they are fully healed, short and not deep. I have never been hospitalized or been to a psychologist, although I did go once to group therapy for a few weeks. I haven't mutilated since then and it was stupid and I know I am stable enough to be in there, but I fear the scares will PDQ me.... 


Any suggestions? How can I make them less visible?

I put this here because it has to do with my career.


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## Falling Leaves (Aug 18, 2011)

How noticeable are they, really?

I have similar scars on my thigh and arms and they aren't easily visible unless you either know to look or are really close. So long as there aren't any up and close inspections, I'm sure nobody would be any the wiser. 

When they were really red and angry however, I did try silicone gel... it was really expensive, required several months of treatment and didn't really do much... plus I think it becomes less effective as the scar becomes more healed.


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## cityofcircuits (Nov 8, 2010)

I agree with @Falling Leaves about not worrying too much about them even seeing them especially where they're at.

I have scars on both forearms and you can't really see them unless you get up close.
And btw, I had been at a very low point in my life at one time, it was a short stupid phase and its way behind me now.


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## MatchaBlizzard (Sep 20, 2011)

Most scars that aren't deep probably aren't gonna bring up any questions.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

Falling Leaves said:


> How noticeable are they, really?
> 
> I have similar scars on my thigh and arms and they aren't easily visible unless you either know to look or are really close. So long as there aren't any up and close inspections, I'm sure nobody would be any the wiser.
> 
> When they were really red and angry however, I did try silicone gel... it was really expensive, required several months of treatment and didn't really do much... plus I think it becomes less effective as the scar becomes more healed.


They are very noticeable and there are at least 12 that would be impossible to NOT see. I have some burn scars on my arms but some are from work and I could easily explain them. It's the thighs that worry me and I think will get me a PDQ at MEPS... I don't want one stupid mistake damage my future...



cityofcircuits said:


> I agree with @_Falling Leaves_ about not worrying too much about them even seeing them especially where they're at.
> 
> I have scars on both forearms and you can't really see them unless you get up close.
> And btw, I had been at a very low point in my life at one time, it was a short stupid phase and its way behind me now.


I'm glad you're better now 


MatchaBlizzard said:


> Most scars that aren't deep probably aren't gonna bring up any questions.


How do you know? Do you have experience in this?


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## MatchaBlizzard (Sep 20, 2011)

Not with the military. It depends on whether they are specifically looking for it or not I'd wager. However, you say yours are noticeable, so that nixs my other comment. But I have family with military experience... I'll inquire further if you'd like.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

MatchaBlizzard said:


> Not with the military. It depends on whether they are specifically looking for it or not I'd wager. However, you say yours are noticeable, so that nixs my other comment. But I have family with military experience... I'll inquire further if you'd like.


Thanks! I'd appreciate that.


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## MatchaBlizzard (Sep 20, 2011)

Okay found 2 links:

Can self-inflicted scars prevent you from being accepted in the army? - Yahoo! Answers

Self Inflicted Scars - Topic

Looks like you can have them, but can't admit to having done them yourself. Seems tricky.
I can still ask people though if you want.


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## MatchaBlizzard (Sep 20, 2011)

I will still ask just to double check.


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## Falling Leaves (Aug 18, 2011)

You could try special scar-hiding make-up... however, I don't know how expensive or effective it would be. 

Also, this would put you in the realm of deliberately hiding it.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

Falling Leaves said:


> You could try special scar-hiding make-up... however, I don't know how expensive or effective it would be.
> 
> Also, this would put you in the realm of deliberately hiding it.


Yeah... If I lie, I could get caught and screwed... But the only way to get in seems to lie in one way or the other... Maybe finding a way to grow thicker thigh hair... I just have to get past MEPS because they are on my thigh. After that nobody would see it...


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

I'm just gonna be honest about it... No point in getting what I want through deception.


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## Doll (Sep 6, 2012)

I was going to say, you could possibly avoid direct questions with a vague response. A simple, "I suffered from abuse as a child" could be telling the truth without actually admitting to having done it YOURSELF. Sure, it leaves them with a false impression, but many people who have self-mutiliated don't suffer from mood or personality disorders and they shouldn't all be assumed otherwise - however, many DO, which is why the military would be wary.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

Doll said:


> I was going to say, you could possibly avoid direct questions with a vague response. A simple, "I suffered from abuse as a child" could be telling the truth without actually admitting to having done it YOURSELF. Sure, it leaves them with a false impression, but many people who have self-mutiliated don't suffer from mood or personality disorders and they shouldn't all be assumed otherwise - however, many DO, which is why the military would be wary.


Yes, I understand it means I may be more likely to do stupid things over there, but idk... My dad told me to deny going to therapy but I already told my recruiter. I'm not going to lie my way into it. Not getting in for being honest is a lot more honorable in my eyes....


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## Doll (Sep 6, 2012)

ISFjosue0098 said:


> Yes, I understand it means I may be more likely to do stupid things over there, but idk... My dad told me to deny going to therapy but I already told my recruiter. I'm not going to lie my way into it. Not getting in for being honest is a lot more honorable in my eyes....


I don't think they would deny you simply because you've gone to therapy - at least not from what I understand. I do know that you can't be on any medications, though. My brother wanted to join the military when he was 18, but he was diagnosed as Bipolar 1 with psychosis less than two years later.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

Doll said:


> I don't think they would deny you simply because you've gone to therapy - at least not from what I understand. I do know that you can't be on any medications, though. My brother wanted to join the military when he was 18, but he was diagnosed as Bipolar 1 with psychosis less than two years later.


I'm sorry to hear that :/ Did he ever try getting in again?


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## Doll (Sep 6, 2012)

ISFjosue0098 said:


> I'm sorry to hear that :/ Did he ever try getting in again?


No. He would have to be functioning off of his medication, I think... which, for him, isn't possible right now.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

Doll said:


> No. He would have to be functioning off of his medication, I think... which, for him, isn't possible right now.


:sad:


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## bellisaurius (Jan 18, 2012)

Going through my memories of how thoroughly they looked at stuff at MEPs (former navy), I don't remember them looking all that hard. They're generally looking for reasons to let you in, not to kick you out. 

However, depending on the job you're looking at, there may or may not be waivers available (if you wanted to go entirely on the up and up). I'd probably go with @Doll's idea of saying it was from some kind of abuse you received if it came to that. 


Now, after you get in, and you need to get a security clearance, be completely honest. They'll look, and they have a decent chance of finding. You probably won't not get a clearance based on what you've described (it'll just take longer), but you definitely won't if you say you didn't and they find out.


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## bluekitdon (Dec 19, 2012)

I wouldn't lie if directly challenged, but I wouldn't offer information about it unless asked.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

bellisaurius said:


> Going through my memories of how thoroughly they looked at stuff at MEPs (former navy), I don't remember them looking all that hard. They're generally looking for reasons to let you in, not to kick you out.
> 
> However, depending on the job you're looking at, there may or may not be waivers available (if you wanted to go entirely on the up and up). I'd probably go with @_Doll_'s idea of saying it was from some kind of abuse you received if it came to that.
> 
> ...





bluekitdon said:


> I wouldn't lie if directly challenged, but I wouldn't offer information about it unless asked.


I already told my recruiter I had those scars but they are old. Haven't heard back from him, but I did receive a call today from a Navy official wanting to ask some questions. I was at work so I'm calling back tomorrow.

The job I want requires TS so I don't wanna risk getting in with a lie only to be discharged after the investigation. Besides, how honorable is to serve your country under false pretenses? Not at all.


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## bellisaurius (Jan 18, 2012)

ISFjosue0098 said:


> The job I want requires TS so I don't wanna risk getting in with a lie only to be discharged after the investigation. Besides, how honorable is to serve your country under false pretenses? Not at all.


There are plenty of congressional medal of honor winners who lied about their age to get in, so I don't know if it's that cut and dried, but I understand that you want to do it right, which if you get in to the field you want (which is the best way to do the military), is going to require a clearance, is best to know now. 

That said, here's a copy of the stuff that's normally waivable: Maintain Copies Of Your Medical Records, and the stuff that's not: Medical Conditions Normally Not Waiverable

The first comment in this thread identifies your condition explicitly: Medically Disqualifed at MEPS, Now What?


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

bellisaurius said:


> There are plenty of congressional medal of honor winners who lied about their age to get in, so I don't know if it's that cut and dried, but I understand that you want to do it right, which if you get in to the field you want (which is the best way to do the military), is going to require a clearance, is best to know now.
> 
> That said, here's a copy of the stuff that's normally waivable: Maintain Copies Of Your Medical Records, and the stuff that's not: Medical Conditions Normally Not Waiverable
> 
> The first comment in this thread identifies your condition explicitly: Medically Disqualifed at MEPS, Now What?


Thank you for those. I didn't see anything about self-mutilation, although I guess it would fall under the mental illnesses area. However, I have not been diagnosed with any mental illness listed there. I read the Army Regulation 40-501 and it said people with scars caused by self-mutilation were not fit to serve... It didn't say anything about time... I'm hoping the fact that it was 6 years ago and I've had no recurrences will help.


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## bellisaurius (Jan 18, 2012)

It's the top comment, by navydoc to jennifer in the third link about being disqual'd:



> Navydoc says:
> February 14, 2013 at 11:12 am
> Jennifer,
> The Navy does not give a lot of waivers for either anaphylaxis or history of self mutilation. They may ask for allergy testing and/or psychiatric consults before making a determination.


So, there may actually be a waiver out there if you answer the questions they way they feel comfortable with.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

bellisaurius said:


> It's the top comment, by navydoc to jennifer in the third link about being disqual'd:
> 
> 
> 
> So, there may actually be a waiver out there if you answer the questions they way they feel comfortable with.


*sighs*

If they see it and ask, I'll just say they are scars from six years ago. Nothing else. It's obvious what it is, but maybe if I don't admit to it they will see all my other good qualities and give me a chance.... They'd be passing up on someone who would serve even for no money at all. I want to serve.


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## userslon (Jan 29, 2013)

ISFjosue0098 said:


> I want to join the Navy, but I have some self-inflicted scars on my thighs that are very noticeable. What are my chances of getting in? It was many years ago and they are fully healed, short and not deep. I have never been hospitalized or been to a psychologist, although I did go once to group therapy for a few weeks. I haven't mutilated since then and it was stupid and I know I am stable enough to be in there, but I fear the scares will PDQ me....
> 
> 
> Any suggestions? How can I make them less visible?
> ...


you misspelled SELF


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## bellisaurius (Jan 18, 2012)

ISFjosue0098 said:


> *sighs*
> 
> If they see it and ask, I'll just say they are scars from six years ago. Nothing else. It's obvious what it is, but maybe if I don't admit to it they will see all my other good qualities and give me a chance.... They'd be passing up on someone who would serve even for no money at all. I want to serve.


I think I read that more positively than you did. I saw it saying there's a number of those waivers greater than zero.

Of course, given my knowledge of recruiters, I wouldn't be surprised if the call was one where you'd be asked some loaded questions like "You weren't diagnosed with anything, were you?", or other such things that would allow them to take it off the sheet. They're a rather seedy lot. It could also be a shrink from the MEPs as well, but you'll find out tomorrow. 

I like that you're manning up to it. It says lots of good things about you.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

userslon said:


> you misspelled SELF


You are dyslexic.



bellisaurius said:


> I think I read that more positively than you did. I saw it saying there's a number of those waivers greater than zero.
> 
> Of course, given my knowledge of recruiters, I wouldn't be surprised if the call was one where you'd be asked some loaded questions like "You weren't diagnosed with anything, were you?", or other such things that would allow them to take it off the sheet. They're a rather seedy lot. It could also be a shrink from the MEPs as well, but you'll find out tomorrow.
> 
> I like that you're manning up to it. It says lots of good things about you.


Hehe I guess ISFJs tend to be a bit negative and paranoid  many people with worse self-scars have gotten in and MEPS didn't even notice. I worry a lot I guess and want things to go well. Thanks for all your info and the compliment


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## userslon (Jan 29, 2013)

ISFjosue0098 said:


> You are dyslexic.
> 
> 
> 
> Hehe I guess ISFJs tend to be a bit negative and paranoid  many people with worse self-scars have gotten in and MEPS didn't even notice. I worry a lot I guess and want things to go well. Thanks for all your info and the compliment


Based on what evidence?!? I am freaking out over here :shocked:


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

userslon said:


> Based on what evidence?!? I am freaking out over here :shocked:


I didn't misspell SELF.


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## userslon (Jan 29, 2013)

ISFjosue0098 said:


> I didn't misspell SELF.


yes you did, you said "Slef-mutilation"
Can somebody else testify to this?


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

userslon said:


> yes you did, you said "Slef-mutilation"
> Can somebody else testify to this?


Oh, I just saw it in the title. I thought you meant in the post. Is that all you had to add to this thread?


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## userslon (Jan 29, 2013)

I would advice you to go through with it, maybe they will not have anything negative to say about it. Though I have no experience with the army. I would also recommend you to learn to love your person. I found this very helpful in my personal life. As I am a new dumped person in this world (as of a month), so I am slowly recovering from that wound.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

UPDATE:

I told my recruiter about the scars. I called today to tell him I have some credits from a Junior College I attended in PR and he told me to get the transcript and go down to his office... he didn't mention anything about the scars... I hope this is a good sign!


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## Tjones (Mar 20, 2013)

Two of my good friends have these, but on their arms. 
Makeup covers them up and disguises them most of the time. Also you will be wearing clothes most of the time, so that should help. In my years i have noticed that most people are scared of scars and will ignore them and not ask. You could always say 'I don't know' if pressed


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## Tjones (Mar 20, 2013)

sorry i posted before reading your update! glad to hear things are going well


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