# Anyone need a life coach, advice, criticism? Line up here!



## thatjuiceguy (Jul 28, 2013)

I'm very direct and ill tell you what you need to hear the rest is up to you. The reason why I am willing to offer my services for no charge is because seeing your success is reward enough for me. You obviously don't have to take my advice, but it cant hurt to just see what it may be right? Message me if your seeking confidential conversation.


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## Monsieur Melancholy (Nov 16, 2012)

Okay, I have a bit of a broad question, but an answer to it might help me out.

How do I not let the words and actions of others bother me in any way, and go about living my own life for me, regardless of what's happening around me?


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## thatjuiceguy (Jul 28, 2013)

Well you have to first realize that the opinion probably doesn't matter to begin with. Lots of people will always be there to say bad shit about you. To me the more the better it means you're being an individual and everyone's different just don't take things personally it most likelyhas more to do with them than you anyways.


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## JamesSteal (Apr 14, 2013)

Which thought processes can help in getting an Xanatos Gambit started?


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## dragthewaters (Feb 9, 2013)

What should I do with my life? I majored in molecular and cellular biology. However I absolutely do NOT want to go to grad school, and without a Ph.D you can't do much in science besides being a lab tech (which is a dead-end and relatively low-paying job). Even though I'm good at biology I've always thought of myself as being more of a liberal-arts person in general. I only majored in biology because I thought it was a "useful" major and because my self-esteem was too low to pursue my true passion, writing.

I decided to go into education but I'm not sure if that's right for me either. I worry that I won't be able to articulate my ideas effectively, that people won't listen to me (they usually don't, in life), and that my anxiety will get the best of me. I turned down one interview for a job teaching at a charter school because the school was in a really dangerous neighborhood and I was scared to go there (also I didn't feel prepared for the rigors of the job). Now I have an interview tomorrow with a relatively prestigious tutoring company. My plan is to tutor full-time for the next year, and then enter an alternative teaching certification/master's program in education.

I randomly met someone who works for the company last week and he said they have a shortage of tutors so I'm very likely to get hired. But even if I do get hired, it might be part-time work, and I'm really looking for full-time. And if I don't get hired...I'm pretty much running out of tutoring agencies to apply to. And I don't even know if I'm going to suck as a tutor or not.

I'm considering becoming a lab tech for the short-term if the tutoring thing doesn't work out. I went to an Ivy League college and have really good lab internship experience so I would probably be able to get a job like that fairly easily. Not to mention my old supervisor at the lab where I worked for 3 summers is looking for a lab tech. But the problem is, what would happen afterwards? I wouldn't be learning anything new or growing as a lab tech, so once I decided to look for something else it would be the same thing all over again but without the advantage of being just out of college. Maybe I could study for a certification in that time and get a government job or something.

I feel like the most useless person on the planet.


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## thatjuiceguy (Jul 28, 2013)

JamesSteal said:


> Which thought processes can help in getting an Xanatos Gambit started?


Find inexperienced players to set them up early in the game as soon as possible and be versatile while executing your game plan.


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## thatjuiceguy (Jul 28, 2013)

If writing is your passion I suggest pursuing that. You can make money doing anything if you do it right and have a market interested in whatever you are providing. What kind of writing do you enjoy the most?


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## Tad Cooper (Apr 10, 2010)

thismustbetheplace said:


> What should I do with my life? I majored in molecular and cellular biology. However I absolutely do NOT want to go to grad school, and without a Ph.D you can't do much in science besides being a lab tech (which is a dead-end and relatively low-paying job). Even though I'm good at biology I've always thought of myself as being more of a liberal-arts person in general. I only majored in biology because I thought it was a "useful" major and because my self-esteem was too low to pursue my true passion, writing.
> 
> I decided to go into education but I'm not sure if that's right for me either. I worry that I won't be able to articulate my ideas effectively, that people won't listen to me (they usually don't, in life), and that my anxiety will get the best of me. I turned down one interview for a job teaching at a charter school because the school was in a really dangerous neighborhood and I was scared to go there (also I didn't feel prepared for the rigors of the job). Now I have an interview tomorrow with a relatively prestigious tutoring company. My plan is to tutor full-time for the next year, and then enter an alternative teaching certification/master's program in education.
> 
> ...


It's not true that you can't get jobs without a phD  I strongly advise you look into the area you wish to specialise in and then contact places around the country. Also, work experience is very valuable (find some lab volunteer work and gain experience.)
I'm a biology student at the moment and went to a school over summer and was told that the phD route is just one way to go. There's lots of choice if you look for it, so don't be discouraged!!


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## Tad Cooper (Apr 10, 2010)

My question:

How can you tell if you're in the right relationship for you? I can't ever work out my feelings for people, my sexuality, my own thoughts when it comes to that. I think relationships are supposed to be able to make you feel intense feelings, but I've never had that. I also got confused because a guy I know said relationships are just being friends and having physical stuff too...


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## dragthewaters (Feb 9, 2013)

tine said:


> It's not true that you can't get jobs without a phD  I strongly advise you look into the area you wish to specialise in and then contact places around the country. Also, work experience is very valuable (find some lab volunteer work and gain experience.)
> I'm a biology student at the moment and went to a school over summer and was told that the phD route is just one way to go. There's lots of choice if you look for it, so don't be discouraged!!


You can get jobs, but not really anything that amazing or with career potential. It's possible to get some government jobs with a biology bachelor's if you get additional certifications, but those take months to study for obviously so that would be more of an option for next year. And I don't want to be a Medical Technologist or anything like that.

I have tons of lab experience actually -- 4 summers of full-time lab work plus three semesters of a part-time internship during the school year. And all of these were at world-renowned research institutions. So if I became a lab tech it would be for the money, not to actually gain any new experience.


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## dragthewaters (Feb 9, 2013)

thatjuiceguy said:


> If writing is your passion I suggest pursuing that. You can make money doing anything if you do it right and have a market interested in whatever you are providing. What kind of writing do you enjoy the most?


I want to be a TV writer, but obviously that's pretty much an impossible dream due to how competitive the market is. I am good at pretty much any kind of writing though -- creative, academic, scientific, anything but poetry really. I'm not saying I never will be a writer but I don't think I should pin my hopes on it considering that a) I have the ability to be good at other things, and b) so many people already want to be writers and so few succeed.


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## Tad Cooper (Apr 10, 2010)

thismustbetheplace said:


> I want to be a TV writer, but obviously that's pretty much an impossible dream due to how competitive the market is. I am good at pretty much any kind of writing though -- creative, academic, scientific, anything but poetry really. I'm not saying I never will be a writer but I don't think I should pin my hopes on it considering that a) I have the ability to be good at other things, and b) so many people already want to be writers and so few succeed.


This website might give you a few pointers: Intro to Screenwriting - Paolo Russo

With the science stuff, you could always look for internships and apprenticeships?


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## dragthewaters (Feb 9, 2013)

tine said:


> This website might give you a few pointers: Intro to Screenwriting - Paolo Russo
> 
> With the science stuff, you could always look for internships and apprenticeships?


After 5 years of internships, I'm kind of ready to get paid for my work....Have you even been reading anything I said?


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## Tad Cooper (Apr 10, 2010)

thismustbetheplace said:


> After 5 years of internships, I'm kind of ready to get paid for my work....Have you even been reading anything I said?


I meant paid ones :/


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## associative (Jul 1, 2013)

thismustbetheplace said:


> After 5 years of internships, I'm kind of ready to get paid for my work....Have you even been reading anything I said?


Well, you've tasted a career in science and reading between the lines you clearly don't want to go in that direction.
Don't throw good money/time after bad.

How about your interest in writing. You're clearly creative. TV shows are just one option to realise the fulfillment you are looking for - start thinking about the specific "qualities" your ideal job will have rather than a specific role.

I took the liberty of reading your blog. Sorry if that's creepy, I needed more info.
It sounds like you're being crushed by the weight of expectations - real and exaggerated. You'll never be able to live authentically until you are able to set this to one side. _Assertiveness_ will be key for you to start living the life you want to lead. Look into methods of developing it.

Next up - self discovery. You need to spend some time slacking off. Seriously. _Without guilt._
4 summer internships, Ivy league university with a major chosen for pragmatic rather than personal reasons, guilt for being unemployed. Age 21. You have overly-high expectations of yourself.
Make some cash at your tutoring job, save up and go travelling. See something beautiful and something meaningful. Goa. Rome. Jerusalem. Take your fiance with you. Let these experiences lift you, and just focus on the moment.

When you get back, things will be a lot clearer.

Let your values guide you.


@thatjuiceguy - hope you don't mind me gatecrashing your thread. You thanked tine's contribution - so I took it as open-season.


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## Lacrimosa (Jan 5, 2013)

How do I stop letting words and the way people say things get to me?


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## StElmosDream (May 26, 2012)

Wonderwall said:


> How do I stop letting words and the way people say things get to me?


Never easy to figure out; all too often we fear they may be right or spend so much time internalising projections of 'us' when in reality something as banal as 'you[a]re[] stupid' becomes 'by what standard?' if you actually self reflect upon what bothers you, then test said 'reality' with positive examples or recent incidents of oversimplifications perceived.

However we must also take a step back, observing whom 'the authority' on us actually is and what they seek to gain by influencing how we see ourselves; take intelligence or skill as an example, does it feel more likely that someone feels threatened or inferior, perhaps even fearful on some level of what might happen to them if you exceed their best efforts with greater ease.


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## Xenograft (Jul 1, 2013)

Wonderwall said:


> How do I stop letting words and the way people say things get to me?


You will need to embrace yourself before you can embrace anyone else, and if you let anyone, EVER, tell you that you are less than you are then you have not learned to love yourself yet. You need to focus on self fulfillment and self actualisation, and try to shut out the bullshit that other people will say to you. Regarding "the way they say it," it would help to stop over analysing the tones that people say things with, I would honestly just focus on the content, and not the delivery. If you take what they say at face value without emotionally dictating what they mean you might be a happier person and you might not be as easily hurt.

Also, my signature quote.


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## thatjuiceguy (Jul 28, 2013)

Yeah dude its cool I'd rather have more people participate and contribute anyways. If your looking for an opportunity to write I have several ideas for videos and a team minus a writer. If you want more info on the opportunity ler me know also looking for input and I'd love to see your creativity in writing something fun it would probably be good for you. I'm just looking to have fun and experience life I met the camera woman today and think its all falling into place wonderfully. Umm so yeah! Let me know if you are enthusiastic and interested the team is full of similar people.


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