# Why do people stare?



## Children Of The Bad Revolution

Sorry if this isn't in the right section, I couldn't think where it might be appropriate to post this thread so apologies there. (I might have even posted about this subject before on here.)

I just get a lot of people staring at me on what seems like a daily basis. Now, before I come across as some vain girl who thinks she's all that and a bag of fish and chips, I don't. But I don't see why people would stare at me, for a period time like they seem to. Other people seem to stare at me a lot for some reason; male and female/adult and children.

I know it's not because I have anything on myself or my face or that I am particularly attractive so why would people do this? And how can I not get freaked out about this cause it seems to happen a lot? Some people have told me I'm imagining it but other people have confirmed this to happen when they've been with me and people have stared at me. Do people really stare at ugly faces for a long time? I don't understand, that's all. I don't see how I could imagine people physically looking at me. It's very strange.


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## PowerShell

Well unless you have something that stands out like say a deformity, maybe people are staring because you are hot.


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## Lemxn

I sometimes believe it's my imagination but it happens to me everyday and that make act more awkward and shy, it's like, don't look at me, please! My friends says it's beause I'm "striking".


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

PowerShell said:


> Well unless you have something that stands out like say a deformity, maybe people are staring because you are hot.


I know that's not true. I don't know if I have a deformity, I have a pretty big nose I think. I don't know what they'd be looking at but I know people don't think I'm hot or attractive; it's just not true.


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## PowerShell

isingthebodyelectric said:


> I know that's not true. I don't know if I have a deformity, I have a pretty big nose I think. I don't know what they'd be looking at but I know people don't think I'm hot or attractive; it's just not true.


Got a pic?


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

PowerShell said:


> Got a pic?


INFJ pictures thread.


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## Lemxn

isingthebodyelectric said:


> I know that's not true. I don't know if I have a deformity, I have a pretty big nose I think. I don't know what they'd be looking at but I know people don't think I'm hot or attractive; it's just not true.



This right here, is your imagination, not the other thing. You couldn't never know that.


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

Lemxn said:


> This right here, is your imagination, not the other thing. You couldn't never know that.


Mirrors? Photographs?


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## Lemxn

isingthebodyelectric said:


> Mirrors? Photographs?


But this is your own perception, you couldn't know what other are thinking when they're looking at you. 
I could be "striking" but I don't know what they're thinking when they look at me, I don't have his eyes, I have mine. Everyone sees different.

Nevermind...


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## PowerShell

isingthebodyelectric said:


> INFJ pictures thread.


Got a link so I don't have to dig super deep?


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

PowerShell said:


> Got a link so I don't have to dig super deep?


 - http://personalitycafe.com/infj-forum-protectors/43648-infj-pictures-post4198671.html#post4198671


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## PowerShell

isingthebodyelectric said:


> - http://personalitycafe.com/infj-forum-protectors/43648-infj-pictures-post4198671.html#post4198671


Not bad :wink:


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

PowerShell said:


> Not bad :wink:


Not bad. But awful, right? lol

I think it's rude in any situation, people shouldn't do it because it makes people feel self conscious. One day I will have the cajones to go up to someone and ask what they're looking at but I can't think of it in any other way than bitchy lol


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## PowerShell

isingthebodyelectric said:


> Not bad. But awful, right? lol
> 
> I think it's rude in any situation, people shouldn't do it because it makes people feel self conscious. One day I will have the cajones to go up to someone and ask what they're looking at but I can't think of it in any other way than bitchy lol


Do it.


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

PowerShell said:


> Do it.


I will one day lol :laughing: Anyway, the topic was about people staring. Why are people doing it to me? Do people actually stare at ugly people? I don't find myself staring at anyone even if they are "attractive". I don't get it.


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## clairdelunatic

Is it possible you're doing something socially inappropriate without knowing it?

When I was in Korea for a year, I was told by my friends that people could really tell I was American, even if I looked Korean. They couldn't point out why but thought it might have to do with my facial expressions or my clothes or the way I walk. 

My first morning taking classes, I stopped by a bakery and a 7/11 (God bless American chains) for fresh bread and a drink. I picked up something that (I thought) read "Morning Dew." So hm! Sounds like a good breakfast drink, right? Except when I got on the bus and started drinking it, it was vile. I'd never tasted anything like it. So I assumed it was somehow medicinal and continued to drink on the bus, and on the subway. Meanwhile, people were staring at me. I just thought, "I get it. I'm wearing tennis shoes, so I'm American, right?"

Wrong. Fast forward seven hours when I wake up at the campus soccer field with a sunburn and a _wicked _hangover. I don't know how I got there, but when I looked at the bottle again, it said... well, it didn't say Morning Dew. It was a brand of soju. I felt like such a bonehead. Physically and figuratively.

It's hard to imagine that you're doing something odd _all _the time. But that's just the thing. You just might not know, right?


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

clairdelunatic said:


> Is it possible you're doing something socially inappropriate without knowing it?
> 
> When I was in Korea for a year, I was told by my friends that people could really tell I was American, even if I looked Korean. They couldn't point out why but thought it might have to do with my facial expressions or my clothes or the way I walk.
> 
> My first morning taking classes, I stopped by a bakery and a 7/11 (God bless American chains) for fresh bread and a drink. I picked up something that (I thought) read "Morning Dew." So hm! Sounds like a good breakfast drink, right? Except when I got on the bus and started drinking it, it was vile. I'd never tasted anything like it. So I assumed it was somehow medicinal and continued to drink on the bus, and on the subway. Meanwhile, people were staring at me. I just thought, "I get it. I'm wearing tennis shoes, so I'm American, right?"
> 
> Wrong. Fast forward seven hours when I wake up at the campus soccer field with a sunburn and a _wicked _hangover. I don't know how I got there, but when I looked at the bottle again, it said... well, it didn't say Morning Dew. It was a brand of soju. I felt like such a bonehead. Physically and figuratively.
> 
> It's hard to imagine that you're doing something odd _all _the time. But that's just the thing. You just might not know, right?


I'm very conscious of myself around people so I make sure that I don't look odd or am doing anything odd. I don't think I do odd things, I don't speak to myself or anything like that. I try not to make any presence of myself at all.


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## PowerShell

isingthebodyelectric said:


> I will one day lol :laughing: Anyway, the topic was about people staring. Why are people doing it to me? Do people actually stare at ugly people? I don't find myself staring at anyone even if they are "attractive". I don't get it.


I really don't pay attention too much to anything for too long.



clairdelunatic said:


> It was a brand of soju.


Well it does come in a 12 or 20oz bottle that kind of looks like it should be Mountain Dew or something. Weirdest liquor bottle I've seen.


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## clairdelunatic

PowerShell said:


> Well it does come in a 12 or 20oz bottle that kind of looks like it should be Mountain Dew or something. Weirdest liquor bottle I've seen.


Thanks for understanding. 



isingthebodyelectric said:


> I'm very conscious of myself around people so I make sure that I don't look odd or am doing anything odd. I don't think I do odd things, I don't speak to myself or anything like that. I try not to make any presence of myself at all.


I know what you mean. But one of my best friends in class is an INFJ, and (maybe her perception is different because she is a 4?) she always says that her hyper vigilance sometimes makes her stand out more than she would have had she been on a mild depressant.

Not to say that you're definitely doing something strange!  I just find it helpful to be aware of the possibility, myself. It doesn't keep me from doing things that I later realize were strange, but it does help me understand people's reactions.

Your photo is lovely, btw. Maybe people think you look nice after all, and that's that? (I agree with PowerShell. You should ask.)


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## PowerShell

clairdelunatic said:


> Thanks for understanding.


My buddy came back from South Korea and had a few bottle of Soju with him. He pulled one out and handed it to me. I started drinking it like I would a beer since the bottle looked just like a beer bottle. He's like, "Are you going to drink the whole thing?" I'm like I thought you said this was rice wine or something. Then he explained it was actually like liquor. Needless to say we passed it around and he ended up in a scuffle with some bouncers at a bar we went to later that night.


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## TheOffspring

Some people just stare... Like me. :blushed: I can't help myself, i just go in dreamy mode and stare straight into people their face like... O.O I catch people staring at me all the time as well. It's not unusual, it's probably whether you pay attention to it or not.


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## Promethea

I recommend meanmuggin' them bitches who stare.


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## iemanja

isingthebodyelectric said:


> - http://personalitycafe.com/infj-forum-protectors/43648-infj-pictures-post4198671.html#post4198671


Oh! You're pretty.

*stares*


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

iemanja said:


> Oh! You're pretty.
> 
> *stares*


Er no but thanks for your kind comment @iemanja.


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## PowerShell

Maybe people are high. You know like either they're staring at your beauty or they're just zoned off and the direction of their stare is towards you but they're really just staring into space.


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## IncoherentBabbler

Odds are you're insecurity is showing and people are looking to find out why that might be. So, it's probably just idle curiosity.


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## Onewithsouls

beauty, replusive, y'know


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## Glenda Gnome Starr

you must be good looking.
edit: saw the picture. you are quite attractive.


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## Lemxn

PowerShell said:


> ...they're just zoned off and the direction of their stare is towards you but they're really just staring into space.


I hate when this happens to me, I mean, my mind is anywhere else but then I come back to earth I realized that my eyes where "staring" at someone.:laughing:


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## noelani887

I have the problem of random people staring at me too. It probably happens to most people because people are just just nosy and inconsiderate, tbh. People don't care or stop to think about how other people feel that they're staring at them. I mean yeah it might be "fun" to people-watch or whatever but that doesn't mean you should just stare someone down.


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## DualGnosis

I think you're either too concerned of what other people are doing or you're more attractive than you think you are. or both.

If people keep staring, just stare at them back with a disgusted or intimidating look.

If that doesn't work go into a lotus position and start going "ahmmmmmmmmm... ahmmmmm..." Then you will truly have peace of mind.


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## Haydn

isingthebodyelectric said:


> Glances are okay but after a few seconds and repeated glances, its weird at least imo. I get people look at you because you're there but to keep looking? Hmm.


I have this problem as well and I do know that it is not in my imagination because when I go out with relatives or friends they have also noted that people do stare at me a lot more than what is generally considered normal. In my case, it is probably that I often look super confident or super awkward or just do not quite seem to be there like everyone else somehow and I am also very tall and people do tend to notice and stare at extremes. 

I think some INFJs have a problem with being stared at and there is a description at the similarminds.com website that states that INFJs fear drawing attention to self and does not like to be looked...both of these are extremely true in my case.

I do not think you need fear about people looking at you because you are unattractive, you are actually quite the opposite.


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## DualGnosis

Haydn said:


> I think some INFJs have a problem with being stared at and there is a description at the similarminds.com website that states that INFJs fear drawing attention to self and does not like to be looked...both of these are extremely true in my case.
> 
> I do not think you need fear about people looking at you because you are unattractive, you are actually quite the opposite.


This maybe irrelevant to the topic but your font change was tripping me out for a good minute. It might also be because I'm kind of tired.


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## Night & Day

isingthebodyelectric said:


> Not bad. But awful, right? lol
> 
> I think it's rude in any situation, people shouldn't do it because it makes people feel self conscious. One day I will have the cajones to go up to someone and ask what they're looking at but I can't think of it in any other way than bitchy lol


Girl you are hot. That's why they stare. And your nose isn't big. :kitteh: What the heck are you talking about? xD


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

Fine Shrine said:


> Girl you are hot. That's why they stare. And your nose isn't big. :kitteh: What the heck are you talking about? xD


Lol You high rn?


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## lunny

I don't understand why you keep saying no when people compliment your looks. It is their opinion. Whatever reason it is that people stare, it's not something to worry about. It could mean something, but most of the time it's just nothing.


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## Promethea

PowerShell said:


> Maybe people are high. You know like either they're staring at your beauty or they're just zoned off and the direction of their stare is towards you but they're really just staring into space.


i always think babies look high as shit when they're staring at me or zoning out/staring off into space. 
i wonder if these parents are getting their babies high. 
babies are creepy.


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## Promethea

lunny said:


> I don't understand why you keep saying no when people compliment your looks. It is their opinion. Whatever reason it is that people stare, it's not something to worry about. It could mean something, but most of the time it's just nothing.


i think shes just shy and modest. ; )


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## Uralian Hamster

DualGnosis said:


> If people keep staring, just stare at them back with a disgusted or intimidating look.


This happened to me last summer, it was terribly awkward. I was on the receiving end of the disgusted look, I wasn't even looking at her, I was looking at the road because I was lining my car up to the stop line on the road...which is strange, but I wasn't staring at her. It made me feel pretty bad. Like...I don't deserve that, even if I did look at you, maybe its because you look familiar, or I like your shirt or something.


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution

Oh that's crap if someone gave you a dirty look. I try not to be rude or have a disgusted look on my face. More like huh look lol I try to smile at people. Most don't smile back.

Sent from my HTC Sensation Z710e using Tapatalk


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