# What is (in theory) the worst/best couple?



## pianopraze (Jun 29, 2009)

snail said:


> The ideal would be INFP with INFP. The worst match would be INFP with ESTJ or ENTP. There would be endless disharmony in either case. With the ESTJ, it would happen because of a clash of values on every possible level, and with the ENTP, it would happen because one partner would consider conflict entertaining while the other would consider it a form of torture.
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Actually my first wife was ESTJ... we were best friends. It worked well until I got PTSD in the army then she abandoned me...


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## principii (Jul 9, 2009)

Wouldn't INFP with INFP have no direction? Wouldn't one of the partners end up getting frustrated?... I had some guy friends (two) who were INFP... we always had the best times together, doing nothing, doing anything, just talking or not talking ... anyhow, things always seemed to fizzle out. IDK.

My DH is an INTJ and although he can sometimes walk-about like he's RIGHT and ain't NOBODY gonna prove otherwise, we get along superbly. Sometimes we can even forget we're in a relationship. And then we wake up/snap out of whatever reverie, and it's like a whole new relationship, all over again. VERY nice. :happy:


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## Perseus (Mar 7, 2009)

*Gbh*



Charlie said:


> I'm vote ESTJ and an ENFP.
> 
> Personally, I know an ESTJ would eat my NF soul with a spoon. If I didn't kill him in his sleep first. Which might happen.




This is called GBH in England. Grevious Bodily Harm.


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## shygirl (Jul 31, 2009)

The absolute worst match would be ESTJ and INFP.

I would also say that an IXTJ would not go so well well an ENFP.

The best would be INFP and INFJ, INFJ and INFJ, or INFP and INFP.


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

ClubbedWithSpades said:


> I'm seeing an INFP.
> And let me tell you...
> It's NOT because he's an INFP. =P
> 
> ...


My boyfriend is an ENFP and we get along incredibly well. In fact, Ive clicked with everyone ive met who share his type. 

The only disadvantage is, since we are both strong Nned, our relationship is too intellectual/platonic in expense of the physical part.


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## Alaiyo Sakuri (Jan 1, 2009)

Sunless said:


> My boyfriend is an ENFP and we get along incredibly well. In fact, Ive clicked with everyone ive met who share his type.
> 
> *The only disadvantage is, since we are both strong Nned, our relationship is too intellectual/platonic in expense of the physical part*.



I have this same problem with my INTP boyfriend! LOL :crazy: it's so frustrating. Have you guys worked that out in any positive way?


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

JuneBugGemini said:


> I have this same problem with my INTP boyfriend! LOL :crazy: it's so frustrating. Have you guys worked that out in any positive way?


Its a work in progress 
Ive been doing some more research on specific functions and i believe it has to do both with sharing _*strong Nes*_ and sharing the least developed shadow function: _*weak Se*_*. So we are both removed from the here-and-now.

Of course, sharing the strong Ne is what makes the relationship so awesome (mind melding, conversation etc) but it also brings lots of problems, especially in the long run because sensuality (not only sex but all types of sense related activities) tend to recede to the background until its almost non existent. You end up knowing everything there is to know about each other, having amazing conversations, enjoying time together, but very unsatisfied physically. 

* Functions:

INTP........ ENFP

Ti .............* Ne*
*Ne *............Fi
Si ..............Te
Fe ............. Si
Te ............. Ni
Ni .............. Fe
*Se *............. Ti
Fi .............. *Se*


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## Alaiyo Sakuri (Jan 1, 2009)

Sunless said:


> Its a work in progress
> Ive been doing some more research on specific functions and i believe it has to do both with sharing _*strong Nes*_ and sharing the least developed shadow function: _*weak Se*_*. So we are both removed from the here-and-now.
> 
> Of course, sharing the strong Ne is what makes the relationship so awesome (mind melding, conversation etc) but it also brings lots of problems, especially in the long run because sensuality (not only sex but all types of sense related activities) tend to recede to the background until its almost non existent. You end up knowing everything there is to know about each other, having amazing conversations, enjoying time together, but very unsatisfied physically.
> ...


I totally agree with that; makes a lot of sense. The conversations are so friggin' awesome, we forget how much we like to be touched :tongue:

So, what are you guys doin' to rectify this prollem?


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## INFpharmacist (Aug 7, 2009)

JuneBugGemini said:


> I totally agree with that; makes a lot of sense. The conversations are so friggin' awesome, we forget how much we like to be touched :tongue:
> 
> So, what are you guys doin' to rectify this prollem?


How could you even rectify a problem like that?

Guess you could feed each other chocolate-covered strawberries, but that would get old fast.


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## Viktoria2 (Feb 15, 2009)

*Worst is INFP+ENTP. 
or maybe unbalanced ISTJ+ENFP [Don't get me started, worst idea ever.]
Best might be INFJ+ENTP or ENFP+INTJ or INTP.

Doesn't mean I'm right, it's just an opinion.
*


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## pianopraze (Jun 29, 2009)

I don't understand how so many systems recommend I's go with E's... 

This would be a recipe for frustration and disaster... I've seen it in two personal relationships so far.

Either I work to hard to go out with them and get overwhelmed and crash...

Or they get stifled and not enough interaction...

maybe more middle ground E and I might work... but a 100%I like me would not do well with any sort of strong E...


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

JuneBugGemini said:


> I totally agree with that; makes a lot of sense. The conversations are so friggin' awesome, we forget how much we like to be touched :tongue:
> 
> So, what are you guys doin' to rectify this prollem?


Well, ive tried talking to him about it, but he seems a bit sensitive with this issue (especially when it comes to sex) so now i just try to come up with weird plans. I really like to eat yummy food, so I already force him to dine out AT LEAST twice a week, and when we are dining, i ask him to shut up sometimes, in a cute way :tongue: he doesnt get offended anymore.

On the sexual department... well.. I asked my ESFP friend for ideas and we came up with a plan in which we are supposed to treat each other to a surprise every two weeks. So once a month each one of us has to prepare a sexy surprise for the other.. it has worked out a bit


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## Femme (Jul 12, 2009)

Perseus said:


> Each one has its worst (called the Welas or the Welsh)
> 
> INTP X ISFP Eagle x Cat
> 
> ...


Perseus, do you happen to have a list of the compatible types (based on your system, of course)?



Also, in regards to the *INTP* X *ENFP* relationship, I think it works out splendidly. 

For some odd reason or another, ENFPs seem to like me. (I think another INTP here said that, too) I think it's an indescribable, mutual understanding between the two types. I don't know the cognitive functions too well, but the INTP and the ENFP just seem to somehow balance eachother out flawlessly.
I've noticed that ENFPs are profoundly smooth. I don't know how they do it, but they can remove the awkwardness from any situation. It's like they have powers.. once they understand what's going on, they know what to say and how to act... Okay, I'm getting a little off topic here. But, yeah.


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## INFpharmacist (Aug 7, 2009)

pianopraze said:


> I don't understand how so many systems recommend I's go with E's...
> 
> This would be a recipe for frustration and disaster... I've seen it in two personal relationships so far.
> 
> ...


I feel that way, too. I would never want to date an E again.


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## INFpharmacist (Aug 7, 2009)

Perseus said:


> Each one has its worst (called the Welas or the Welsh)
> 
> INTP X ISFP Eagle x Cat
> 
> ...


I think many, if not all of these relationships, could work if the more fragile creature were female and stronger creature were male.

Shoot... I would love for a bear to protect me from landing in the middle of head-on traffic...


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## Alaiyo Sakuri (Jan 1, 2009)

Sunless said:


> Well, ive tried talking to him about it, but he seems a bit sensitive with this issue (especially when it comes to sex) so now i just try to come up with weird plans. I really like to eat yummy food, so I already force him to dine out AT LEAST twice a week, and when we are dining, i ask him to shut up sometimes, in a cute way :tongue: he doesnt get offended anymore.
> 
> On the sexual department... well.. I asked my ESFP friend for ideas and we came up with a plan in which we are supposed to treat each other to a surprise every two weeks. So once a month each one of us has to prepare a sexy surprise for the other.. it has worked out a bit


Good for you guys!! =^^= sounds fun and cute. So we [me and the bf] aren't completely off-track. I discussed with him that we should be less apprehensive and more physically expressive/spontaneous toward each other, but it's been a minute since I seen 'im, so we havent really had a chance to act on it.


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## Pablonuts25 (Aug 19, 2009)

Sunless said:


> My boyfriend is an ENFP and we get along incredibly well. In fact, Ive clicked with everyone ive met who share his type.
> 
> The only disadvantage is, since we are both strong Nned, our relationship is too intellectual/platonic in expense of the physical part.





JuneBugGemini said:


> I have this same problem with my INTP boyfriend! LOL :crazy: it's so frustrating. Have you guys worked that out in any positive way?


OMG " intellectual/platonic in expense of the physical part" this is so true. My only girfriend (3 years relation) was an enneatype 7, i think an ENFP. We are very good friends now.


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## Alyse (Aug 12, 2009)

so sayyy my ideal guy is someone who is outgoing, to break me out of my shell, someone who expresses care for me, so as to break down my walls and let me trust him, and someone who is very funny, so as to keep me grounded and not so lost in my own thoughts. Also someone who is confident, so that they know I care even though i have trouble expressing it, and so they dont get clingy and constantly seek approval which i obviously dont have the energy to give... What personality type would that be.


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## Alaiyo Sakuri (Jan 1, 2009)

Alyse said:


> so sayyy my ideal guy is someone who is outgoing, to break me out of my shell, someone who expresses care for me, so as to break down my walls and let me trust him, and someone who is very funny, so as to keep me grounded and not so lost in my own thoughts. Also someone who is confident, so that they know I care even though i have trouble expressing it, and so they dont get clingy and constantly seek approval which i obviously dont have the energy to give... What personality type would that be.


SOunds like someone of the ENFX variety. Most likely ENFJ. Or perhaps ESTJ or ESFJ.


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## Alaiyo Sakuri (Jan 1, 2009)

Pablonuts25 said:


> OMG " intellectual/platonic in expense of the physical part" this is so true. My only girfriend (3 years relation) was an enneatype 7, i think an ENFP. We are very good friends now.


Oi!  lol is there *any* way to move past that?


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## Viktoria2 (Feb 15, 2009)

> so sayyy my ideal guy is someone who is outgoing, to break me out of my shell, someone who expresses care for me, so as to break down my walls and let me trust him, and someone who is very funny, so as to keep me grounded and not so lost in my own thoughts. Also someone who is confident, so that they know I care even though i have trouble expressing it, and so they dont get clingy and constantly seek approval which i obviously dont have the energy to give... What personality type would that be.





> SOunds like someone of the ENFX variety. Most likely ENFJ. Or perhaps ESTJ or ESFJ.


*More like ENFP. Obviously. See below. *


> Also, in regards to the *INTP* X *ENFP* relationship, I think it works out splendidly.
> 
> For some odd reason or another, ENFPs seem to like me. (I think another INTP here said that, too) I think it's an indescribable, mutual understanding between the two types. I don't know the cognitive functions too well, but the INTP and the ENFP just seem to somehow balance eachother out flawlessly.
> I've noticed that ENFPs are profoundly smooth. I don't know how they do it, but they can remove the awkwardness from any situation. It's like they have powers.. once they understand what's going on, they know what to say and how to act... Okay, I'm getting a little off topic here. But, yeah.


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

Viktoria said:


> *More like ENFP. Obviously. See below. *


Only thing about ENFP she doesnt seem to like is the fact that they love attention/affection so much. So they can be clingy... Otherwise it sounds pretty much like that type. Perhaps ENFJ?


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## 480 (Jan 22, 2009)

INFPharmacist said:


> Shoot... I would love for a *bear* to protect me from landing in the middle of head-on traffic...


Awwww, I just changed my name. Sorry you missed your chance.


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## INFpharmacist (Aug 7, 2009)

Grim said:


> Awwww, I just changed my name. Sorry you missed your chance.


Yeah... Guess I was just "ruling the world with my headphones on in fairytale land"... and missed out- he he he... :tongue: (Someone told me that I was doing that not too long ago. )

Anyway...

I think I would like an ISTP guy. I doubt most INFPs would want one, but ISTPs almost always put me at ease, which is what I would want in a mate and don't have right now. They're just really hard to keep around, though, and very demanding whenever they come back to you- but that's the beauty about them; they don't stay long enough to get too far up your you-know-what.

ISTP Profile: "they lie dormant, saving their energy until a project or an adventure worthy of their time comes along--and then they *launch* themselves at it. The apparently frenzied state that inevitably ensues is actually much more controlled than it appears" - ISTP Profile


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## pianopraze (Jun 29, 2009)

You really think ENFPs are clingy? They seem more like butterflies to me...


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## Femme (Jul 12, 2009)

Oh, they can be quite clingy... (I'm speaking from experience)


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

Those two things arent mutually exclusive, piano. ENFPs tend to be clingy and they also tend to flutter around. They need tons of affection.


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## thehigher (Apr 20, 2009)

Romantic Matches for me in order from best to worst
1 ENTJ
2 ENFJ
3 INTJ
4 INTP
5 INFP
6 ESTJ
7 INFJ
8 ESFP
9 ENFP
10 ISTP
11 ESFJ
12 ENFP
13 ISFP
14 ESTP
15 ISTJ
16 ENTP


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## pianopraze (Jun 29, 2009)

Sunless said:


> Those two things arent mutually exclusive, piano. ENFPs tend to be clingy and they also tend to flutter around. They need tons of affection.


I'll take your alls word for it... My first wife was an ESTJ... but now she lists herself as ENFP on facebook... but she was never clingy... not sure I dated anyone else who was ENFP... so I'll believe ya...


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## Femme (Jul 12, 2009)

thehigher said:


> Romantic Matches for me in order from best to worst
> 1 ENTJ
> 2 ENFJ
> 3 INTJ
> ...


Why is ENTJ your best, and ENTP your worst?

Care to elaborate?


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## 480 (Jan 22, 2009)

thehigher said:


> Romantic Matches for me in order from best to worst
> 1 ENTJ



Give us a kiss then, love.


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## 480 (Jan 22, 2009)

INFPharmacist said:


> I think I would like an ISTP guy. I doubt most INFPs would want one, but ISTPs almost always put me at ease, which is what I would want in a mate and don't have right now. They're just really hard to keep around, though, and very demanding whenever they come back to you- but that's the beauty about them; they don't stay long enough to get too far up your you-know-what.
> 
> ISTP Profile: "they lie dormant, saving their energy until a project or an adventure worthy of their time comes along--and then they *launch* themselves at it. The apparently frenzied state that inevitably ensues is actually much more controlled than it appears" - ISTP Profile


ISTPs often type as enneagram 8w9s. The 8w9 is often called the bear. Being 8w9s so often is what gives the ISTP the reputation that it has. (Some ISTPs.... not so bad ass.... thus the credit goes to the enneagram. not the MBTI.)

I see you... wanting a bear... wanting an ISTP. Perhaps you should start looking for numbers instead of letters.


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## INFpharmacist (Aug 7, 2009)

Grim said:


> ISTPs often type as enneagram 8w9s. The 8w9 is often called the bear. Being 8w9s so often is what gives the ISTP the reputation that it has. (Some ISTPs.... not so bad ass.... thus the credit goes to the enneagram. not the MBTI.)
> 
> I see you... wanting a bear... wanting an ISTP. Perhaps you should start looking for numbers instead of letters.


So now romance has come down to numbers...:crazy:

I'll have to give what you've said a thought :happy:, because I'm not into enneagram at all- at least not right now.


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## 480 (Jan 22, 2009)

INFPharmacist said:


> So now romance has come down to numbers...:crazy:


Well either that or a dirty four-letter word, like... ENFP for instance.


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## INFpharmacist (Aug 7, 2009)

Grim said:


> Well either that or a dirty four-letter word, like... ENFP for instance.


Oh that is so wrong... but funny! ENFP is not a word! :crazy: Abbreviation anyone? :tongue:

Yeah. You're right. Half a dozen of one or six of another... Guess I'm just hesitant to start another system. I've been into type, i.e. XXXX, since my mom introduced it to me at age 13. :blushed: My mother and I speak in terms of type, too, so that might make things a little weird whenever we speak... hmmm... idk though...???


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## 480 (Jan 22, 2009)

INFPharmacist said:


> Oh that is so wrong... but funny! ENFP is not a word! :crazy: Abbreviation anyone? :tongue:
> 
> Yeah. You're right. Half a dozen of one or six of another... Guess I'm just hesitant to start another system. I've been into type, i.e. XXXX, since my mom introduced it to me at age 13. :blushed: My mother and I speak in terms of type, too, so that might make things a little weird whenever we speak... hmmm... idk though...???


MBTI is a solid theory. Nothing wrong with sticking with it. That said... MBTI does not replace the enneagram or vice versa. They each focus on a different aspect. MBTI focuses on behavior. The enneagram focuses on reasons/motivations. As such they compliment each other.

It's like right now you have an eye-patch on over a perfectly good eye. Remove it and enjoy the new depth-perception. 

Or leave it on... eye-patches can be sexy.


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## INFpharmacist (Aug 7, 2009)

Grim said:


> MBTI is a solid theory. Nothing wrong with sticking with it. That said... MBTI does not replace the enneagram or vice versa. They each focus on a different aspect. MBTI focuses on behavior. The enneagram focuses on reasons/motivations. As such they compliment each other.
> 
> It's like right now you have an eye-patch on over a perfectly good eye. Remove it and enjoy the new depth-perception.
> 
> Or leave it on... eye-patches can be sexy.


Ahhh... I see. Ok. Thank you for clarifying that. :happy:

I'll leave it on for now. I'm not ready to understand people that much more, because I can already see patterns and stuff before it happens. Adding the enneagram could just make me crazy(ier).

Whenever you've been exposed to and use MBTI at a young age, you're life can have a particular structure that would seem superficial or insincere to an INFP. Basically, I've made or broken friendships with people because I know their type, which they are almost always unaware of (<-- I hate this hanging preposition! :tongue . It's sort of like I have an advantage over them, which I don't always think is fair. ... So, adding more to the structure is not what I want right now. :mellow:


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## Alaiyo Sakuri (Jan 1, 2009)

Sunless said:


> Those two things arent mutually exclusive, piano. ENFPs tend to be clingy and they also tend to flutter around. They need tons of affection.


+1

I personally fluctuate between the two quite often.


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## Bohemian (Aug 18, 2009)

Out of curiosity, how well do a ESFJ and an INFP go together?


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## ShellyINFP16 (Aug 23, 2009)

I agree. I'm not a highly emotional infp, but my relationship with an entp did not work out. He annoyed the heck out of me and was very selfish. I had to say goodbye!

----

Yeah, I can see that...I'm an infp.

----

ISTP x INFP Bear x Bird of Paradise

All these could end in Murder quite easily.


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

pianopraze said:


> I'll take your alls word for it... My first wife was an ESTJ... but now she lists herself as ENFP on facebook... but she was never clingy... not sure I dated anyone else who was ENFP... so I'll believe ya...


Oh no, not all ENFPs are clingy or fluttery. Its more of a tendency. My boyfriend is ENFP and he is clingy but he is not fluttery


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## INFpharmacist (Aug 7, 2009)

ShellyINFP16 said:


> ISTP x INFP Bear x Bird of Paradise


I have an ISTP brother, uncle, and first cousin who I love dearly and miss all the time, especially whenever I think about them. They're sweet, playful, and loving guys.

I guess it depends on who you've loved and trusted as to what type of person you would want to have around.



I would never date an ENTJ, ESTP, or ISFJ again... The ENTJ always "knew best", the ESTP always put me second to everyone else, and the ISFJ took, took, took, took, took....


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## ShellyINFP16 (Aug 23, 2009)

> Originally posted by *INFPharmacist-* I think I would like an ISTP guy. I doubt most INFPs would want one, but ISTPs almost always put me at ease, which is what I would want in a mate and don't have right now. They're just really hard to keep around, though, and very demanding whenever they come back to you- but that's the beauty about them; they don't stay long enough to get too far up your you-know-what.


Yeah, I kind of messed up my previous post...I'm new and I didn't know what I was doing. But I think that if an ISTP and an INFP do not compromise, it could very well get ugly. I've been in a relationship with an ISTP for 3 years now and at first we had a lot of severe clashes. Now that we're learning each other are relationship is much better. If you really love someone you work to improve things so you can live in peace with one another.

But as for your quote...I'm an INFP and I have to say that I'm crazy about my ISTP. We have our times, but over all he's an excellent partner. ISTPs are deniably pretty darn sexy! Their confidence and sensuality is pretty alluring too. I would have to say that I don't think that ISTPs are hard to keep around, especially since I think they can equally be drawn to INFPs the way that we can be drawn to them. As introverts we know how to give the ISTP that much needed "space" they need. Because my ISTP knows that I don't invade his space, in turn he's actually kind of clingy (not in a bad way). We spend time together every day and he's usually always the first one to innitiate contact.


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## Mutatio NOmenis (Jun 22, 2009)

The worst is INTJ+ISTJ.


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## Perseus (Mar 7, 2009)

*Hawk x Dog*



mortabunt said:


> The worst is INTJ+ISTJ.


Perseus System says ENTJ x ISTJ & INTJ x ISFJ ARE WORST. Not far out though.


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## Lypgloss (Apr 22, 2010)

Regarding initial post on thread, my Dad is an INTJ and my mom is an ISFJ and they get along great. Although my Dad is sometimes E. Therefore I don't think this counts anymore :blushed:


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## thisisme (Apr 11, 2010)

Perseus said:


> Each one has its worst (called the Welas or the Welsh)
> 
> INTP X ISFP Eagle x Cat
> 
> ...



very interesting...i think you're right!


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