# OkCupid...



## Fleetfoot (May 9, 2011)

Have you ever been on it for anything other than the quizzes? :wink:

Have you ever gotten anything out of it, other than quiz results?

Do you actually take it seroiusly?!?! Just kidding...but do you?


I have an account, and I made it when I was 16 because my friends had some just to see who would creep on them and read all the funny messages creepers would leave...it left us with some real serious laughs. It was like a PG version of ChatRoulette.

Anywho, tell your horror/success stories, or why anyone would go on that site, etc.


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## sparkles (Mar 2, 2011)

Tawanda said:


> 1. Have you ever been on it for anything other than the quizzes? :wink:
> 
> 2. Have you ever gotten anything out of it, other than quiz results?
> 
> ...


 1. Yes I have. 

2. Yes I have. 

3. Sort of. I don't like to take "dating" too seriously. I haven't lived in the area very long and it's a cool way to meet new people. It's gotten me some interesting conversations, a few first dates, made one friend out of it, made another friend or maybe more, and met someone I'm currently trying to decide what to do about. Great person and all I'm just... weird about it. He could be my boyfriend if I decide I want that. I thought I did but I backpeddled because of how strongly I was feeling about everything. 

I love that I can just talk to random people online and date that way. It's appealing to the nerd in me.

I could meet people in other ways but it's really convenient and I have a greater level of control than I do when people just walk up to me on the street. I can decide to ignore a message if I want to, harder to just walk away from someone standing in front of me. I don't like to reject people and I can do it more passively in this medium. 

I don't think it is something to look down your nose at. I know a woman who got into a wonderful, meaningful relationship with someone she met on OkC and I've seen a couple people on there talk about meeting their spouse on there. It's also great if you're busy or if your hobbies and interests don't put you in touch with many datable people.


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## Jennywocky (Aug 7, 2009)

*Have you ever been on it for anything other than the quizzes? :wink:*

Yeah, I talked to some guys I met on that site.

*Have you ever gotten anything out of it, other than quiz results?*

Nothing ever panned out. Most of the guys I met were just not worth meeting, and the few left over, things just didn't go anywhere. In fact, I would say I ended up feeling severely disillusioned by the few guys that I actually started to get to know better; they weren't the guys I thought they were in terms of their character.

There was one guy who actually did seem very nice, and I hope he found someone worth his attention, but I could tell our personalities were different enough that it just wouldn't go anywhere.

*Do you actually take it seroiusly?!?! Just kidding...but do you?*

Close to as serious as I probably would take an online forum in terms of meeting people, I guess. 

But there were definitely lots of nutty guys. I can't begin to tell how the sort of cheap, dumb pickup lines guys would try on me -- and I could tell immediately we had nothing in common and it wasn't worth talking to them. My account is currently inactive, because I just got tired of even bothering.

However, I have had friends who have had luck where the relationships because long-term ones. It just depends on how lucky you are, timing-wise, and what you say on your profile.

*I have an account, and I made it when I was 16 because my friends had some just to see who would creep on them and read all the funny messages creepers would leave...it left us with some real serious laughs. It was like a PG version of ChatRoulette.*

Never been on CR or gone there, but I've heard stories. *shudder*


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## Fleetfoot (May 9, 2011)

I can see how it can be very useful when moving to a new place and getting to meet new people, and even finding a significant other (when you're at a certain age range). Haha, sorry if you think I'm looking down on it. It's more of just a joke to me, since most of the experiences I've had on there were just....well, jokes.


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## Jennywocky (Aug 7, 2009)

Tawanda said:


> I can see how it can be very useful when moving to a new place and getting to meet new people, and even finding a significant other (when you're at a certain age range). Haha, sorry if you think I'm looking down on it. It's more of just a joke to me, since most of the experiences I've had on there were just....well, jokes.


I'm not gonna argue with you there. I've certainly dissed that site on other forums, there was only a small percentage of guys who were even worth investigating further.


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## Fleetfoot (May 9, 2011)

Jennywocky said:


> I'm not gonna argue with you there. I've certainly dissed that site on other forums, there was only a small percentage of guys who were even worth investigating further.


Haha, so true. I think it varies between age demographic, what others are looking for, and geographical location on whether that site is hit or miss for people.


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## sparkles (Mar 2, 2011)

Well I've gotten a ton of the hey babies, you're gorgeous, type of messages too. Meh. 
I haven't had hoards of awesome people talking to me exactly but it hasn't been a total loss either. I'm too positive minded to diss it :tongue:


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## Zster (Mar 7, 2011)

Have you ever been on it for anything other than the quizzes? Yes, I did tons of chatting and got quite a bit of entertainment out of their rather outrageous forums.

Have you ever gotten anything out of it, other than quiz results? Yes, I ended up having several good friends, two which I have kept in touch wiht for years, wiht one being particularly close, as cyber friendships go, anyway.

Do you actually take it seroiusly?!?! Just kidding...but do you? I was on it purely for entertainment and to "pseudo date" - meaning cyber only. As a responsible solo parent, I was not honestly seeking to hook up or date IRL, just flirt/kid around in cyberspace in my PJs after tucking the kids in. Not many would go for that (I got called a LOT of bad names for not wanting sex), but the few that did were real gems. We've sort of grown together - learned as each has stumbled through life's curves and tested some relational waters.


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## Kr3m1in (Jan 16, 2011)

So I have like..a phobia of meeting people online.
It's just never seemed like anything I would be interested in doing.
But I lost a bet to a friend and the price of that was him creating me a cupid account.
He did. I never respond to anyone and don't message people either.

I guess I've always had enough going on irl, I get more attention than I can stomach.
Funny enough, the person I currently adore I met on perc.
But besides her, I wouldn't take anything from online to offline.

Funny.


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## sparkles (Mar 2, 2011)

I haven't used OkC for non het stuff. It is supposed to be poly friendly too. I am just too shy to go there. I did talk to this one girl but it didn't go anywhere and she didn't have her shirt together.


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## Cephalonimbus (Dec 6, 2010)

*Have you ever been on it for anything other than the quizzes? :wink:*
Yes, i made a profile a couple of months ago to give this whole internet dating thing a try.

*Have you ever gotten anything out of it, other than quiz results?*
I've been on one date. She's a sweet girl and we talked for several hours over drinks, so it ended up being a fun night out. We've texted a bit after that but i didn't pursue things any further because i never felt any sparks flying so to speak. Still, we had a good time so it was worth signing up.

*Do you actually take it seroiusly?!?! Just kidding...but do you?*
Sort of... i signed up on a whim without any real expectations and a "we'll see what happens" attitude, but despite that i can't help feeling let down by how few women even responded to my messages: one. Indeed, the girl i went on a date with is also the only girl who even replied to my messages at all, and i've sent dozens.

I said i signed up without any expectations, but that's not entirely true because i did at least expect to chat with a few people... subconsciously anyway, it never even occured to me that nearly everybody would simply ignore me. At first i shrugged it off and kept trying, but after being ignored by about 30 people in a row my eagerness to continue started to diminish for some reason.

I'm not sure what the explanation is... Perhaps the average girl on okcupid gets so many messages that she starts deploying an extremely rigorous screening process. Seems more likely than the other explanation, which is that the problem lies with me, or at least my profile and/or messages.

Well i'm glad that at least one girl replied and seemed to appreciate me, because being systematically ignored isn't exactly good for my self-esteem... i like to think that i'm a pretty interesting person, i'm not ugly and my profile is pretty awesome if you ask me. So what the fuck, ladies?



Anyway, i can't blame okcupid for women being feeble creatures :tongue: It's free, the tests are amusing and the matching system appears to work: the girls with whom i have a high match all seem quite interesting. So hypothetically speaking, i think it's a great site 

One detail that amuses me is that you can compare the match questions. Some of the things people consider "unacceptable answers" really baffle me. Seriously, is it _really_ a deal breaker if i don't use facebook? :crazy:


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

Cephalonimbus said:


> Anyway, *i can't blame okcupid for women being feeble creatures* :tongue: It's free, the tests are amusing and the matching system appears to work: the girls with whom i have a high match all seem quite interesting. So hypothetically speaking, i think it's a great site


I hope you know what "feeble" means because that sounds like an insult to me.


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## Kr3m1in (Jan 16, 2011)

sparkles said:


> I did talk to this one girl but it didn't go anywhere and she didn't have her shirt together.


Oh NO! not her shirt!
those are _the worst _*relates*


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

Kr3m1in said:


> Oh NO! not her shirt!
> those are _the worst _*relates*


Bitches love tearing their shirts off.


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## Kr3m1in (Jan 16, 2011)

Fizz said:


> Bitches love tearing their shirts off.


especially on Cupid..that's like..all they do is tear their own shirts open

it's pretty unacceptable.for a mate to do that.


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## Cephalonimbus (Dec 6, 2010)

Fizz said:


> I hope you know what "feeble" means because that sounds like an insult to me.


*grabs dictionary*
No that's not what i meant :\ English isn't my primary language.

I suppose i meant something like enigmatic, and i was refering specifically to women on okcupid. I didn't mean to come across so passive aggressive and sexist... It's just that i haven't been on that site for over a month basically out of disappointment, confusion and frustration from being systematically ignored for reasons that are unfathomable to me, and typing that post brought back some of those feelings.


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## sparkles (Mar 2, 2011)

Cephalonimbus said:


> *grabs dictionary*
> No that's not what i meant :\ English isn't my primary language.
> 
> I suppose i meant something like enigmatic, and i was refering specifically to women on okcupid. I didn't mean to come across so passive aggressive and sexist... It's just that i haven't been on that site for over a month basically out of disappointment, confusion and frustration from being systematically ignored for reasons that are unfathomable to me, and typing that post brought back some of those feelings.


Online dating is harder for the guys I think. It's a crapshoot. Some women don't really check their messages. There's guys out there who have experimented with different message styles to see which ones work best to get a response. 

In short, it's not just like that on OkC. It's like that in online dating generally, and has nothing to do with your worth as a potential partner. Maybe keep in mind a lot of those girls may not even be checking their messages?


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## sparkles (Mar 2, 2011)

Kr3m1in said:


> especially on Cupid..that's like..all they do is tear their own shirts open
> 
> it's pretty unacceptable.for a mate to do that.


 Agreed. Keep your shirt together wimmins. I mean, seriously, the nerve. Dangly bits everywhere.


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## Space Cat (Nov 20, 2010)

I did and deleted my account twice. I 'tried' but had a problem with the whole 'location' thing and meeting people 'near you' as i'm not interested in people 'near me'.
I gave up again just very recently lol. /fail.


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## tuna (Jun 10, 2010)

I tried once, but I mostly just talked video games with nerdy people in my area and took a ton of quizzes. It was actually pretty fun, except for the random creepers.


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## Stephen (Jan 17, 2011)

redmanINTP said:


> To say otherwise is frankly to have some sort of psychological disorder frankly, such as avoidant personality disorder.


While I agree that, for me personally, online is no substitute for in-person contact, the simple act of saying otherwise does not make someone psychologically ill.


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

OkCupid | art_snail / 33 / F / Eddyville, Oregon

Here is my profile. I love this place. I have already found some interesting friends there, at least a couple of whom I chat with on a daily basis because we had an instant bond. If I were still looking for a relationship, and hadn't gotten the one I actually wanted, I could rest assured that I could have my pick from any of the fascinating, compatible people who wish I were still available. It does a lot to boost one's confidence.

It would be interesting to see what my match scores are with my friends here, if anyone wants to check for that.


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