# Can an INTJ be very emotional and moody? Or is he an INFJ?



## Drury (May 22, 2009)

[Deleted by OP because of personal info. Thank you for helping!]


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## Thrifty Walrus (Jul 8, 2010)

Yes, they can. All types show all functions, the letter is just what you prefer.


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## Drury (May 22, 2009)

Okay - thanks! What I'd read so far about INTJs seemed to indicate that they run most things through thinking and so are somewhat removed, where my husband seems the opposite of being removed, with all his underground but close to the surface emotions. But then again, maybe that comes under a trait, and traits aren't always the best indicators of personality preferences.


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## Nickel (Apr 7, 2010)

The INTJ I know is one of the most emotional people I've ever met... He just deals with his emotions in an INTJ sort of way. :tongue:


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## Drury (May 22, 2009)

Two interesting responses - thank you! I didn't really have any idea INTJs could be so emotional. So if they can be very emotional, I'd think the depth of emotions of lack of them must not be connected to F or T or any particular type.

What about his strong need to connect to people and his depression when he loses someone from one of his long-term groups? Is that type-related, as in possibly INFJ, or would it be separate from type? And would the fact that he's so into thing-based information be of more importance in sorting out his personality type than his deep need for connections to people?


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## Sketchy Cadet (Jan 8, 2011)

Last time I checked, I'm human. Therefore I have emotions. Now, all I see is text on here and I'm assuming you are human too because I type in information and submit here, therefore in order to have that effect displayed to me, the supposed "you" must do the same as well as being a human too. 

Believe it or not, you (assuming you are indeed human) are capable of doing human things. Therefore you can:

Breathe
Think
Have Emotions
See reality
See un-reality through "dreams", drugs, or schizophrenia. I know I do it, and so do I.
Talk to people
Choose not to talk to people

To add to the logic above, since you are human, I would assume (and hope) that your husband is, too, human as well. Therefore he can too. Ts and Fs aren't _forced_ to do anything. That very economically conservitive Walrus is absolutely correct-- typing is all about prefering. 

What does typing really do? What about cognitive functions? Check out that guy who wrote "why cognitive function tests are (@$*@)" or something, and read Jung's Psychological Types. I'm sure you have. Don't over-reductionize people; but as a guy about to literally "go to hell" and have to type people to survive, trust me, *personality typing is a very, very valuable skill for strategists*. I wouldn't be surprised if your husband, assuming both human and INTJ, would therefore be quite enthused by it.

I'm sorry a mundane corporate life would do that to him. He sound's like he cares. 

Sorry to burst your bubble there, but random facts is a Thinking Extroverted trait. If he is enthusiastic, he feels a connection to it. If it's just a fact, he feels indifferent to it. Meh, that might just be me. Check out that other "Cognitive #*@(" post later for more details. 

By your description of things and since I was lucky enough to acquaint myself with a large number of INFJs and INTJs, he is indeed *not* and INFJ. He's (for all intents and purposes) a human.


Might I suggest running as an outlet, as well as those "psychologist" NF types. No matter how many introverted subjective-separation heart-felt feelings we have, you need to pry it open. (ENTJ here. Trust me. You're gonna need one hell of a crowbar and some horse tranquilizers to keep us from kickin' ya off.) Get us to talk about feelings. We *NEED* it, especially if its anxiety and depression about future events. 

Oh, and him turning off "Ni" to go "black and white"... that ain't healthy. Theres a *big* difference between self-discipline and repressing. What he's talking about is repressing. That will lead to problems. Self-discipline puts it to the side, but will recognize it later. If I'm sad, I take note of it and finish the job. Then I think (or reluctantly talk) about it later and feel a hell of a lot better. Thats just me, I am unable to know if the same is true for him.

All in all, I wish you and your husband well. I really hope things get better and the world will turn a little slower, everyone stops what they're doing and we all hold hands and sing "kumbyah" (or whatever its called), but as us NTJs are constantly haunted by; this simply cannot happen. Besides, if the world suddenly turned slower, the oceans shifting would probably cause quite a few people to join in our peaceful singing... :crazy:

The people in this country are lucky to have people like him do things that no one else could possibly understand so that we could live the way they tend to live, and do not let him forget that. NTJ's are indeed extremely "dangerous", and were proud of it. :tongue:

Oh, and an INTJ (or any NTJ) freely showing you any caring emotions without using any very painful truth serums whatsoever means that he really likes you.... :blushed:

Oh, and depression is depression. Depression sucks-- it's not about type, but I woudn't be supprised to see T's correlate more with it. (expecailly xxTJs). On a very serious note, I do wish you both the best of luck. I hope its not a serious case...


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## Orion (Jan 25, 2011)

Not an INTJ.


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## Drury (May 22, 2009)

"Sorry to burst your bubble there, but random facts is a Thinking Extroverted trait."

I have no bubble to burst, since I don't care what type he is, I just want to understand. Thank you for taking the time to answer my questions and giving me some things to think about. 

And to Orion - thanks for posting your opinion.

Maybe I should start an INTJ/INFJ poll?


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## Sketchy Cadet (Jan 8, 2011)

@Drury - Good! Just wanting to understand what's going on with him means that you really like him too. Aww... how cute.

Allrighty-- there is a big difference between INTJs and INFJs. The fact that he gravitates towards a scientific career, and has a plethora of random facts... Right there I would assume INTJ, but my personal rule is "never assume anything". Therefore, who knows. INFP? ESTJ? _Why_ is he an INTJ? If the fact that that why is italicized because "why" would intrigue him and I coincidentally made it emphatic would be a good indicator of an NT, or a NTJ. 

INFJs and INTJs are almost incomparable, except for the intrinsic fact that they are both human. Trust me, that's a bit extreme and actually quite easy to tell by someone who doesn't know him as well as you do. I bet you anything he treats you differently than he treats almost anyone else. My suggestion: If you know anyone else that knows typing, but doesn't know him very well (friend or acquaintance, not you or his best buddy); and most of all *let them impartially perform the evaluation* (don't you tell them anything or have any pre-conceived notions of things), that might be your best bet.

However, the random people here might give small tips to help you identify him. This won't do much long term, but I'll admit, its still good and fun. Once again, I wish him luck with his own little personal catharsis there. In the end, I think thats what you're conveying to me to being what this is all about, and he is damn lucky to have someone who cares about him as much as you do.


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## Drury (May 22, 2009)

Thanks The Cmdrofficer! He is my best friend and a lot of fun to be with much of the time. He would like to know his type, but isn't as driven by it as I am. He is able to do N, S, F and T well, which has been very helpful for work and not as much so for either of us to understand who he is, the place where he's most comfortable.


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## Hastings (Jan 8, 2011)

All INTJs are assholes and made out of stone!


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## egsomy (Jan 12, 2012)

My fi comes and goes from time to time.yes some of us can get moody.


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