# A Question for Feelers



## PisceanReve (Jun 2, 2011)

So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal? 
Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?


----------



## 7rr7s (Jun 6, 2011)

It depends on the emotion and the situation. Usually though, I try to hide it. Getting emotional over anything in public never ends well, and infront of family or friends it can get awkward, so I try to avoid that at all costs. Sometimes it's hard to hide, but I've gotten good at it over the years.


----------



## PlusX (Oct 24, 2012)

I seldom know how to desribe my emotions. How can I ever describe the way it feels to meet another person's gaze? Or to feel like you're slipping into your place in the universe? You could say that you 'wonder' at the stars, or 'connect' with another person, but words wouldn't do those emotions justice.

Some things really are special in a way that I could never explain or describe.


----------



## MuChApArAdOx (Jan 24, 2011)

What is a feeler ? Educate me :S


----------



## stephiphi (Mar 30, 2012)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?
> Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?


When you say "express", what do you mean?

If you are referring to my facial expressions or body language, then it certainly depends on the circumstances and the nature of the feelings that I have. I personally am not very good at hiding what I'm feeling, though. I'm basically an open book, even if I try to hide.

If you are referring to expressing it through the actual feeling part of it, then I feel it automatically and immediately. I can only think them through after feeling them first.

With regard to actions taken due to those feelings, I will generally (if not stressed out or overwhelmed) think through the situation as best I can before acting on it.


----------



## Kynx (Feb 6, 2012)

My feelings guide me in making judgements and decisions so I need to be aware of them myself, I don't need to express them.
If they're very strong feelings then they're coming out whether I like it or not, but that's not something that happens often.


----------



## Kito (Jan 6, 2012)

I don't analyze the emotion, I just let it happen inside me. I don't usually express it outwardly unless it's so strong I can barely control it (such as intense excitement or sadness). Feeling an emotion feels like expression in itself.

Like many people I find it hard to put my feelings into words. Where words fail, music and art prevail. (wow, rhyme unintended but I like it)


----------



## sparkles (Mar 2, 2011)

It depends. If it is happiness or excitement and I don't think the context makes it inappropriate I won't censor myself. If I feel hurt, angry, scared, vulnerable, ashamed, or incredibly loved, I tend to soften or "blank out" on the surface while I process the emotions. Then I might express them depending on the situation. 

I try not to express anger without filtering because I can be sort of destructive, throwing stuff or something if I don't filter due to having a snap reaction to things. I'd rather pause and soften it into a rant.

For some reason, certain emotions, or emotions around certain experiences, are damn near impossible to control and they just come out. I can be sensitive.


----------



## reckful (Jun 19, 2012)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?


FWIW, Jung viewed "automatically expressing" emotions vs. "thinking about it first" as more of an extravert/introvert thing than a T/F thing. Here's what he said:

The extravert has no especial difficulty in expressing himself; he makes his presence felt almost involuntarily, because his whole nature goes outwards to the object. ... Because of his *quick reactivity and discharge of emotion*, valuable and worthless psychic contents will be projected together into the object; he will react with winsome manners as well as with dour thoughts and affects. ... The introvert, on the other hand, who reacts almost entirely within, cannot as a rule discharge his reactions except in explosions of affect. He suppresses them, though they may be just as quick as those of the extravert. They do not appear on the surface, hence the introvert may easily give the impression of slowness. Since immediate reactions are always strongly personal, the extravert cannot help asserting his personality. But *the introvert hides his personality by suppressing all his immediate reactions*. Empathy is not his aim, nor the transference of contents to the object, but rather abstraction from the object. *Instead of immediately discharging his reactions he prefers to elaborate them inwardly for a long time before finally coming out with the finished product*. ... As a rule one is badly informed about the introvert because his real self is not visible. His *incapacity for immediate outward reaction* keeps his personality hidden. ...

Both [extraverts and introverts] are capable of _enthusiasm_. *What fills the extravert's heart flows out of his mouth, but the enthusiasm of the introvert is the very thing that seals his lips.*​


----------



## mushr00m (May 23, 2011)

Well for me it just means that people's welfare is often more important than cold facts although I still take those into account, humanity is the upmost important thing. And I tend to get affected by emotionally provoking situations, I think this is where empathy comes in as a feeling quality.


----------



## Ramysa (Mar 22, 2012)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?
> Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?



Well, when u are an extroverted feeler, than yeah, they just come out like an explosion. I have a very hard time trying to hide my emotions . They always manage to escape. U can always tell how I feel abt a certain ...thing or person. I guess with introverted feelers is different. They can keep them under control better. 

How I express emotions... Well , if someone offends me I get very serious and silent. I might even say smth. If I'm pissed (happens very rarely) , again I'm either silent , either I burst into flames and say stuff. Hell, I might even throw a shoe at someone . If I have a good disposition then I'm cheerful and so on. Is this what u wanted to know? I don't "digest" feelings , I just ...feel them.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

Um, I'm pretty sure @_PlusX_ just summed up everyone's experiences of "feeling." And yes, like @_MuChApArAdOx_ asked, "What's a feeler?" One thing's for certain - nothing being mentioned here is specifically indicative of the Jungian concept (after all, F doms have to think about their feelings as well, so.what.?).


----------



## dpt727 (Jul 16, 2012)

reckful said:


> Both [extraverts and introverts] are capable of _enthusiasm_. *What fills the extravert's heart flows out of his mouth, but the enthusiasm of the introvert is the very thing that seals his lips.*​


 This was a light bulb moment for me- thanks @ Reckful 

Like the others, I just feel emotions and I can't hide my expressions. I have a terrible poker face! But finding words to express them is another story. 

I do think about or sift emotions when I don't understand them. Being HSP I sometimes pick up on others emotions like sadness and I realize that I don't own it.


----------



## PisceanReve (Jun 2, 2011)

I know that every has the same potential and capacity for emotions. The question I wanted to ask was more towards feelers just because they do value emotions most of all even though they can, of course, be just as logical as anyone else. It's just it seems their highest priority is feelings, right? Isn't that what defines them?
So that is why I wanted to know how they express emotions and whether they think about them or stifle them, etc.


----------



## anon (Oct 19, 2009)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?
> Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?


It's not always easy to express it by spoken words, so I hide it because in this way they float in a familiar turf, which is within myself. However, the emotions tend to spill over at random times without me trying my best to keep them under wraps whatsoever. They just spill over because they influence me from point A onwards anyway. I am constantly observing them and allowing them to influence my decision-making processes to a certain degree. They're like a reference point. But I have always felt content in learning everyday to embrace my emotions as I feel even I am somewhat a stranger to them and have so much to get to know about them, for instance, why are they present in such and such contexts? How do others around me feel? Why do I feel the way I do? How does it inspire me and others? How much should I not risk sharing with others (vulnerability)? Etc, etc.


----------



## Buffy (Oct 22, 2012)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?
> Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?


There are times when I have uncontrollable bursts of emotions that there is no time to process or think about it and it just comes out. I always try to keep a rein in on my negative emotions and try not to express them in public. I have times when I've had to think about something before I express an emotion, but most of the time it's me having to make an effort to restrain them. I thought ENTPs felt a lot of enthusiasm for all sorts of things, like ENFPs. Isn't that a feeling? Do you have to think about that feeling before feeling it?


----------



## Coldspot (Nov 7, 2011)

It is not a matter of hiding for me. My feelings are already there, it is whether I choose to express them. I can go from calm to angry then happy and no one would know the difference unless I chose to express it. Usually I don't show my emotions to others, because I like to keep everyone at arms length. They surface mostly when they builds up enough pressure. Like having a pot of water on a stove and a lid loosely on top. When the water gets boiling the lid will rattle, but you wouldn't know if there was water in it otherwise. That's my best analogy for how I regard my feelings.


----------



## ParetoCaretheStare (Jan 18, 2012)

It feels like painful heartburn, or gooey coconut ice-cream, or suffocation. You know those reversible vests that you could wear either way to show off either style or color? Sometimes it feels like I want to peel my insides out and allow the air to dissipate the internal layers of flames and heat. That's pretty much what a strong Fi is like. A dormant volcano that can erupt at any time.


----------



## thealchemist (May 19, 2012)

I don't really try to show any emotion other than happiness/excitement to people around me. I'm very internalized and unless someone has insulted my core values, I keep quiet. If I'm feeling negative I don't want to inhibit my friends or family from being in a good mood. I don't want anyone to pity me.


----------



## Mashidar (Oct 4, 2012)

I'm rather empathic in general and have always had the ability to feel the feelings and emotions of other people. Much more easy to do in person and it's been a skill that has made me great in retail because I can take anyone that's angry and flip them around and know how to handle them, as well as feel when someone is upset and make sure to take the time to talk with them to make them feel better. I've been able to work with this skill as well online with people I'm close to, I just can't take a random person online and guess how they feel. But over time and talking on the phone I can pick up emotions rather well no matter the distance.

For me..I just feel it, like it's me gaining that set of emotions but I don't express it on the outside. I've had a few fights with co-workers on how they punish people because I don't agree with the punishment and they can't feel the mood when they are being harsh on someone. 

I don't dwell on it much, I just use what I have for myself and to help others when I can. Other people really don't grasp what I mean so I tell them believe me or not, it's what I do.


----------



## PisceanReve (Jun 2, 2011)

Buffy said:


> I thought ENTPs felt a lot of enthusiasm for all sorts of things, like ENFPs. Isn't that a feeling? Do you have to think about that feeling before feeling it?


Well, I definitely express enthusiasm, as that comes easily for me, like you said! Also, I'm a very outgoing sort of person, so people see that side of me a lot. It's the negative emotions that are more difficult for me and the ones I don't like to really express, though they sometimes spill out, of course, when I'm alone. My closer friends have seen me extremely frustrated...I can't quite tell the difference between that and anger. When does frustration become true anger? Just wondering...
Also, compleeeetely off-topic, but I love the quote in your signature


----------



## mooray (Nov 22, 2011)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?
> Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?


It's almost as I actually feel my emotions inside of me when they happen. Rarely do I outwardly express my true emotions though. I will downplay my expressions to my emotions when I'm in a situation where I'm expected to outwardly express myself. When I do express my true feelings to others then it's almost always around the people closest to me.


----------



## Wellsy (Oct 24, 2011)

I think emotions are meant to be expressed but I think I have internal issues with them which isn't healthy. I'm afraid of anger and I have trouble crying for last few years, I just feel shitty inside which is totally not what you're meant to do as emotions are meant to be expressed in some outlet.
I'm rather reserved though if im happy i dont much give a crap about others ill laugh about stupid things if i want to and interrupt you with a booming laugh. Dont cramp on my happy times 

But automatically expressing them, no, not often. I'm always contained.


----------



## Cristy0505 (Oct 8, 2012)

Kito said:


> Like many people I find it hard to put my feelings into words. Where words fail, music and art prevail. (wow, rhyme unintended but I like it)


Interesting as I'm no good expressing my feelings I use to make arts, like a wallpaper, a illustration... 
When I do like somebody I make lots of arts for them it's the way I find to show them I like em.


----------



## Aqualung (Nov 21, 2009)

I very rarely express my emotions to anyone. Even when playing music I prefer not being around anyone. It's too personal for me. Expressing emotions makes me an easy target I've learned.


----------



## Mashidar (Oct 4, 2012)

I think that another issue I have is while I can feel other's emotions and relate to them. When I'm the one having an issue with someone personal or close, I tend to just let my emotions take control. Not saying anger or hate comes to the front but I deliver all my issues with passion and drive to make sure the point is made. Sometimes it's intense, because when I'm talking about something I love or enjoy I can do so with passion. Or when I'm upset and angry about something I can express that with passion as well. Some people don't like that and it pushes them away, others though want someone that can be so open about their problems so that they know everything is out on the table.

I've just been the type that if there is a problem, then let me know. Let's talk about it, let's work it out. I hate the games people like to play where there might be a problem, but then they don't want to talk about it. It's worse when you can feel people's emotions because you "know" there is a problem. But you can't force it out of someone so you are stuck feeling what they feel and you have no way to get rid of that. It's annoying sometimes.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

Once again, emotions are not the feeling function - at all. Everything being said here might as well apply to anyone. One's ability to act from them might reflect the feeling function and one's prowess there (and it is possible for dom/aux and tert to all have decent abilities here, actually (inferior can too, but they just tend to have a more all-or-nothing relationship to it) - I've heard more than a few experts here refuting the stereotypes (which frankly come from nowhere as far as I'm aware) about only the dom/aux being good at what they do). The point of having a type with reference to say, the F functions, would reflect merely how much weight one puts on the function when it comes to achieving their ego goals. That's literally it. It doesn't mean some types do it more than others - it means that deep within your psyche, you have aims of a higher/lower order with reference to this function when seeking results from your ego desires/choices. You want to make it clear that you're who you want others to see you as, so it will get employed in some way that reflects these desires. Frankly, in the aux./tert. types, it would be aimed more toward how the person wants to come off/accomplish goals specifically with reference to the outside world, while for dom/inferior, it might get dragged into their ideas of their individual identity/how they want to see the world more (all is relative in type, not absolute).


----------



## Deewone (Mar 15, 2012)

I've always been rather reserved showing my true emotions but since I have spent alot of time practicing letting go and allowing I believe I am more open to expressing them. However if you catch me off guard and do something that emote me I tend to internalize. That is my natural reflex. On the surface I can be very animated although that is often a result of other peoples emotions rather than my own. I am so empathic that often I am almost taken over by other peoples emotional states to the point where they attach to me and merge with my own. I have had to learn to put up a mental guard when dealing with people so as not to lose myself in them. But ultimately when my emotions are intense my person is still and silent (especially when it comes to intense happiness and feelings of love) . Feeling intense emotions and expressing them at once is not a natural thing for me. When you see my emotions it is a choice that I made to show them 9 times out of 10 I do that to avoid misunderstanding and the subsequent games that can cause.(Not a big fan of game play) Once in a while my emotions overflow on their own and become expressed as they happen. 

I believe that is why I prefer to be around spontaneous animated positive people. It allows me to relax into myself and be at my most natural which is silently participating. If you ask people who work with me if i'm quiet and reserved they would say noooo. Why? Because I have learned how to be sociable when my natural instinct is to be reserved.


----------



## TheLordlyOne (Jun 20, 2012)

The fundamental force that has guided me through life. It is every feeling possible at once and all the time. It is a compass that always points the right direction but always in different directions. It is very primitive, in that it is something that is and not something to be. It is hard to express and can only really be spoken of metaphorically.


----------



## StElmosDream (May 26, 2012)

I used to bottle them up, now I much prefer to express them in words and acknowledge them where possible... still not mastered full openness though especially when I sense that either people aren't used to 'I'm feeling...' mid conversation or if emotions would be a hindrance in certain professional or customer service positions.
Failing that I much prefer to analyse these feelings and reflect on situations, so I can either learn more about my complexes or consider what effects a scenario had on my state of mind, ensuring I get to the point of separating second hand causes and root causes. (learned these practises from therapy, HSP research and emotional intelligence books)


----------



## Kynx (Feb 6, 2012)

PisceanReve said:


> I know that every has the same potential and capacity for emotions. The question I wanted to ask was more towards feelers just because they do value emotions most of all even though they can, of course, be just as logical as anyone else. It's just it seems their highest priority is feelings, right? Isn't that what defines them?
> So that is why I wanted to know how they express emotions and whether they think about them or stifle them, etc.


Yes, everyone has emotions, how they're expressed isn't what defines a Feeling type. Feelers are more sensitive to emotions because it's necessary to be aware of feelings if you are going to judge effectively with the feeling function. 
What defines a Feeler is that they are aware of very low levels of feeling, which aren't the intense emotions that Thinkers often regard as Feeling. It seems that Thinkers are affected by feeling after their emotions reach a particularly high level of intensity. Often by that point, emotions represent a much more personal, irrational or self-serving motivation. Which obviously, Feelers also experience, but they aren't the feelings that we make rational judgements by. 

I recognise my own personal emotions distinctly from the feeling that directs my judgement function, like two sets of feelings. 
I think about my feelings in order to make sense of them. My judgements are more effective, the more experience I have with different feelings. I believe the sensitivity to emotions is what makes Feelers different to Thinkers, rather than how they are expressed.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

It's important to remember that the feeling function works with rational ideas like "significance/insignificance," "how good, bad, appropriate/inappropriate," etc. stuff is. Once again, it's something that everyone does, but has a different relationship to depending on type.


----------



## Lycrester (Dec 26, 2010)

When I'm uncomfortable,depressed, or feeling awkward,I have no way of masking it. I'll try to smile and push the mood to the back of my mind but it will always shows. However when it comes to jubilation,it takes a while before it actually "comes out". Kind of like an old happiness generator that needs to be cranked and cranked and cranked before you get results.


----------



## Pyroscope (Apr 8, 2010)

Why do I have to express them?

I'm aware of my feelings, I might not like what's causing them but I don't have a choice in whether I'm aware of it.

I don't think of feelings as something that have to be expressed in order to understand them, because I'll know they're there without showing them to anyone.

The way I express feelings though, when I do, is that they'll come out as they appear. Talking through them does give me more insight at times because figuring out how to explain what's going on inside me can sometimes help me to connect what the reasons behind them are. I'm always aware of my emotions but often I have several explanations of where they've come from and explaining them to others helps me to make more connections.


----------



## EmileeArsenic (Jun 8, 2012)

I think this question applies mostly to Fi dom/aux's than everyone with an F in their MBTI type.

I'm not a highly emotional person, nor do I feel very much or express my emotions very often when I do have them. I tend to beat them into submission, categorise them, label them and put them back on the shelf where they belong to be examined and dealt with later. I'm not entirely fond of them when they do rear their ugly little heads. 

The F in my ISFJ is for extraverted Feeling, meaning I like harmony and seek to create and maintain it. I'm almost always more concerned with others' emotions than my own and tend to de-value my own emotions when they do arise.

In short, no, I don't feel the immediate need to express my emotions because by and large I think they're unimportant and irrelevant, and unpleasant at best.


----------



## Impact Calculus (Mar 29, 2012)

I feels you, man.


----------



## crocodilescry (Apr 29, 2012)

I hide my emotions, and if I accidentally let it show I downplay the emotion and turn it into a joke because I am afraid somebody will judge me or make fun of me for it.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

Here's a watered down summary of Jung's ideas of the feeling functions and the others in general (what that function in general is actually getting at): Abstracts of the Collected Works of C.G. Jung - Carrie Lee Rothgeb - Google Books


----------



## twentieslobotomy5 (Oct 21, 2012)

I barely ever express my emotions, but I can feel them. God, do I feel them.


----------



## Nowhere Man (Apr 22, 2012)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them?


Nah, I'm an introverted feeler. That seems more like an extraverted feeling thing.

Either that or I'm just emotionally stunted lol.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

@lookbao

They would the same as anyone else. The way someone expresses emotion would likely not reflect type (it might reflect the Fi or Fe attitudes, though), since mere emotional expression is not a cognitive rationalization of anything - this would be the after-effect of whatever went through your head (think Obama, who's likely an ENFJ or INFJ, and tends to come off as kind of emotionless when he talks quite often). How one might evaluate from emotion might reflect type, but you have to be extremely careful not to mix this up with a person's persona, which there is no guarantee of being able to do successfully without doing some kind of analysis of the person in a more psychological way (after all, evaluation is a tricky subject, since we all do it, it tends to be a personal thing for people, it's arbitrary and often induced arbitrarily, people tend to do it only when they feel like it, etc. - Jung thought it was a "you know it when you see it" phenomenon that, like all other functions, can be deduced by trying to understand where someone appears to be "coming from" in their rational aims through this function). If it's a very consistent personality quirk of a person, then it's likely you're dealing with a dominant F type (with men, this is often very hard to spot, for reasons that I'm sure you're aware of). Dominant Fi frankly couldn't be a harder function to notice (I doubt most people here who think they know what Fi looks like actually have a clue - no, it's not emo), because being a functional strategy of evaluation, it is arbitrary, especially because it resists appealing to "social norms," but rather, appeals to the individualism of the person only truly known to them due to being introverted. It's also often kept to oneself anyway, so it's hard to know what is and what isn't Fi being expressed in the personality of the Fi dom, while obviously, you just have to admit that most people here really have no idea what "feeling reasoning" is to begin with - one thing I can tell you now, it's not the unreasonable emotionalism that it's made out to be - it has a kind of inner logic, which is likely pretty hard to notice in Fi doms as well, unless they're just very open about this function, which you'd probably have to catch them in a pretty extraverted state to get it.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

Truth be told, "emo" in these types would, if anything (I don't see any correlation between Fi doms and emo), most likely come from inferior Te (enacting negative judgments on the objective standards of the world or from the perspective of objective standards). Either this, or just the person's unconscious. Negative emotional states are usually kept away from dominant functions - that's precisely why the dominant function is considered an "ego defense mechanism" to begin with, as well as any of the conscious ones, which try to avoid ego harm as much as possible via negativity, although the inferior tends to take on a negative bent, due to it's association with the person's shadow (but this isn't an absolute, all-the-time issue).


----------



## TrialByFire (Sep 17, 2012)

^^^Thank you times a milion, I honestly couldn't agree more, asking how all feelers express themselves is impossible, because the feelings a person has vary in each and every individual. Just because im a feeler doesnt mean i express myself the same way as all feelers do and vice versa. Also i'd like to note as a FI user, that one of the first lessons i learned was that i couldnt put my feelings out there beacuse it makes me vulnerable to others. Which is why its so hard from a glance, to see im a feeler because i've learned to hide it. Oh and as for the 'emo' thing thats ridiculous because don't emo's put there feelings out there? From what I gathered they dress and act that way to express there feelings to others, thats the LAST thing i would ever do.


----------



## Kynx (Feb 6, 2012)

JungyesMBTIno said:


> @lookbao
> 
> They would the same as anyone else. The way someone expresses emotion would likely not reflect type (it might reflect the Fi or Fe attitudes, though), since mere emotional expression is not a cognitive rationalization of anything - this would be the after-effect of whatever went through your head (think Obama, who's likely an ENFJ or INFJ, and tends to come off as kind of emotionless when he talks quite often). How one might evaluate from emotion might reflect type, but you have to be extremely careful not to mix this up with a person's persona, which there is no guarantee of being able to do successfully without doing some kind of analysis of the person in a more psychological way (after all, evaluation is a tricky subject, since we all do it, it tends to be a personal thing for people, it's arbitrary and often induced arbitrarily, people tend to do it only when they feel like it, etc. - Jung thought it was a "you know it when you see it" phenomenon that, like all other functions, can be deduced by trying to understand where someone appears to be "coming from" in their rational aims through this function). If it's a very consistent personality quirk of a person, then it's likely you're dealing with a dominant F type (with men, this is often very hard to spot, for reasons that I'm sure you're aware of). Dominant Fi frankly couldn't be a harder function to notice (I doubt most people here who think they know what Fi looks like actually have a clue - no, it's not emo), because being a functional strategy of evaluation, it is arbitrary, especially because it resists appealing to "social norms," but rather, appeals to the individualism of the person only truly known to them due to being introverted. It's also often kept to oneself anyway, so it's hard to know what is and what isn't Fi being expressed in the personality of the Fi dom, while obviously, you just have to admit that most people here really have no idea what "feeling reasoning" is to begin with - one thing I can tell you now, it's not the unreasonable emotionalism that it's made out to be - it has a kind of inner logic, which is likely pretty hard to notice in Fi doms as well, unless they're just very open about this function, which you'd probably have to catch them in a pretty extraverted state to get it.


I agree about introverted feeling being kept to oneself. I think Jung described the Fi manifestations as he did because it's the "air of profound indifference" or not initially expressing feeling judgements, that accounts for the outward differences between Fi and Fe. Which could be quite easy to spot once people know exactly what he's describing. The key behaviours reflecting a negative Fi judgement are these parts here; "assumes an air of profound indifference, as a measure of self-defence" "Should this outer side be somewhat emphasized, a suspicion of neglectfulness and coldness may easily obtrude itself, which not seldom increases to a real indifference for the comfort and well-being of others." "There is little effort to accompany the real emotions of the object, which tend to be damped and rebuffed, or to put it more aptly, are 'cooled off' by a negative feeling-judgment." 

When values are threatened, Fi doms will likely go quiet and ignore the person who poses the threat, except when directly addressed or if it's absolutely necessary to communicate with them. All unavoidable interactions will be brief, business-like and not expressed with the usual 'warmth' that ixfps would ordinarily use. If someone is often immediately opposing others values, they're probably not an Fi dom, since they need time put their feelings into words in order to express them. Fi has to be pushed beyond its very flexible boundaries before it reacts. I've noticed that exfps are very similar except, more forthcoming and the "occasional trace of superiority or criticism" happens earlier and more frequently. Also, ESFPs negative feeling judgements are often visible in their facial expressions. Some Fe types I've known, tend to do the same, but only if the situation isn't ideal to speak up and they have to wait.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

> All unavoidable interactions will be brief, business-like and not expressed with the usual 'warmth' that ixfps would ordinarily use.


This has always been a question of mine from the beginning: Are Fi doms even typically warm people (in an outward appearence sense)? Jung didn't even seem to think so. It seems like I can think of a bunch of Fi doms off the top of my head who don't exude any kind of emotional warmth - in fact, Jung said that these types might look emotionless and totally unpredictable. I pretty much see where you're coming from with the rest of what you said.


----------



## Kynx (Feb 6, 2012)

JungyesMBTIno said:


> This has always been a question of mine from the beginning: Are Fi doms even typically warm people (in an outward appearence sense)? Jung didn't even seem to think so. It seems like I can think of a bunch of Fi doms off the top of my head who don't exude any kind of emotional warmth - in fact, Jung said that these types might look emotionless and totally unpredictable. I pretty much see where you're coming from with the rest of what you said.


I'm luke warm. 
Jung said that Fi doms "outward demeanour is harmonious and inconspicuous, they reveal a delightful repose, a sympathetic parallelism,"


----------



## snowbell (Apr 2, 2012)

KindOfBlue06 said:


> It depends on the emotion and the situation. Usually though, I try to hide it. Getting emotional over anything in public never ends well, and infront of family or friends it can get awkward, so I try to avoid that at all costs. Sometimes it's hard to hide, but I've gotten good at it over the years.


This. The full range of emotions is rarely expressed, unless its to someone close and trusted.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

Neverontime said:


> I'm luke warm.
> Jung said that Fi doms "outward demeanour is harmonious and inconspicuous, they reveal a delightful repose, a sympathetic parallelism,"


Yes. I don't think I'd call that warm really (not necessarily, anyhow). Sort of just reminds me of a classic "I'm feeling you" response, where the person can't really prove it other than by saying it. Sort of like they kind of become one in some way with the other person, rather than appeal to external methods of uniting themselves with others on a meta-feeling level (e.g. with Fe, like how respecting personal traditions and such indicates some kind of connection to be found between the two people).


----------



## Kynx (Feb 6, 2012)

JungyesMBTIno said:


> Yes. I don't think I'd call that warm really (not necessarily, anyhow). Sort of just reminds me of a classic "I'm feeling you" response, where the person can't really prove it other than by saying it. Sort of like they kind of become one in some way with the other person, rather than appeal to external methods of uniting themselves with others on a meta-feeling level (e.g. with Fe, like how respecting personal traditions and such indicates some kind of connection to be found between the two people).


I guess it depends on how people personally define warm. I think it's making people feel comfortable in your presence. I believe even on the INFP forum there's a sense of making people feel comfortable and welcome. I don't think anybody would perceive the responses there as being cold.


----------



## Vanishing Point (Oct 2, 2012)

I think it depends. Three Fi doms out of the four I know are very warm and have a soft welcoming vibe, though each is very shy. A warm and fuzzy energy...like warm mittens on a cold winters day. 
The fourth one is completely different and has a gloomy condensed and slightly oppressive vibe. If you know astrology I'd describe it as scorpio type energy.
This is my completely unscientific description of dom Fi vibery.


----------



## Bel Esprit (Aug 2, 2011)

As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words. 
~William Shakespeare


Anyway, whether it has to do with being an introverted, an Fi user, or otherwise, I don't express emotion willingly unless I see a benefit for it or I know I will erupt soon if it is not expressed. I would say 80% of my emotions are never expressed because either I don't know how to do so in an ideal manner or I'm afraid of being misunderstood, criticized, ect. I believe this has more to do with personal issues than being an INFP, though. As an INFP, I must analyze my emotions before I express them and I think most of us do this.
A situation in which my feelings are expressed are when I have a sudden urge of feeling steming from something I witness that I have the need to protect. In this case, my emotions are out before I even know what is happening. I liken this to the scene in Perks of Being A Wallflower where Charlie beats the kid up because he is trying to protect hsi friend. This is similar to how I express emotion and I also think Charlie is an INFP. It's a very accurate example of how deal with emotion.


----------



## JungyesMBTIno (Jul 22, 2011)

Neverontime said:


> I guess it depends on how people personally define warm. I think it's making people feel comfortable in your presence. I believe even on the INFP forum there's a sense of making people feel comfortable and welcome. I don't think anybody would perceive the responses there as being cold.


True (I think Jung was just coming at this from a perspective of surprise at the irony of dominant feeling not _appearing_ dominant at all, but likely at first glance, non-existent). I think it can be neutral as well (assuming we're not mixing the feeling function up with persona mannerisms and extensions, such as mere *acts* of self expression). There's sort of a mediating affect that's appealed to anyhow with feeling, and some people clearly do it with more conscious ego aims than others.


----------



## Kanerou (Oct 8, 2009)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?
> Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?


My emotion tends to leak through. This is not to say that I consciously/purposely express them; rather, what I feel is often mirrored on my face. I hate that, as I may not want others to know what I'm feeling at the time. There are times when I will go stone-faced on purpose, but that's usually a tactic.


----------



## Iustinus (Jun 13, 2012)

Existentialismz said:


> As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words.
> ~William Shakespeare
> 
> 
> ...


Charlie is the archetypal INFP.

I tend to be a very expressive, zany character, but I think that's my craving for absurdity. Moreover, few of my expressions mirror my true emotions. When I do disclose my true feelings, then I'm letting you enter the most sacred temple of my conscious.


----------



## Kriash (May 5, 2011)

When I was younger, I could not control showing how I felt. When something made me angry, it was clear, almost immediately. When I was down, it was extremely obvious. However, not being able to hide your emotions has a huuuge downside, and eventually I began to try and hide what I was feeling. I got quite good at it. Now, I tend to think about things rather than just displaying it out in the open- However, the feelings are still there, and take hold quite quickly.


----------



## Toru Okada (May 10, 2011)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?
> Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?


I don't really express emotion unless it's going to have a positive effect. Like amusement, excitement, etc. The only 'bad' emotions I display are generally discontent and anger to a very leashed extent. If I get boo-hoo I try to seal myself off from other people unless it gets really bad and somehow bubbles over (extremely rare)

I notice in the very few things where I'm a control freak, apathy and unresponsiveness from others grates my nerves and I tend to display it by turning into a jerk and start becoming antagonistic. This sounds vague but I'll leave out explicit examples.


----------



## Thief Noctis (Jan 6, 2012)

PisceanReve said:


> So when you feel emotions, do you automatically express them? Like, you feel them and they just come out before you know it or do you have to consciously make an effort to express what's inside?
> I know that I can't remember a time when I expressed an emotion without it going through my head and thinking about it first, so is that strange or normal?
> Basically, I guess I just want to know how you express emotion?


Depends what the emotion is and who I may or may not be with at the time. If I'm just typing to a friend online, there's almost no chance I won't express myself. It's much easier to do it when you're not face-to-face, so I pretty much pour my life story out to people if I'm upset, or step way over the line if I'm angry.
I barely express them in real life. It's not difficult to do if someone starts on the topic or just asks, but I'm rarely around people who care enough to do so. If I'm with a really close friend or family member, or if someone gets me seriously angry, then I just react without thinking. I never think before I express emotions, just do it because I want to get my point across or I can trust them. Unfortunately, I jump to conclusions too quickly sometimes, and I have a serious jealousy issue, so those never go down to well when I don't think about what I'm doing and the effects it might have. Especially when I have a tendency to overreact in some situations, it just gets worse and worse.
Purely from shyness though, I'll almost never express myself in public unless it's unbearable to do otherwise.


----------



## lissakae (Nov 9, 2012)

It depends...at home I cry, laugh, yell etc....without really thinking. 
Anywhere else I try my best to hide my emotions but if something is really wearing me down then people can read it on my face.


----------

