# "...Just Kidding!"



## s1ng4m3 (Jun 29, 2009)

I have to get this off my chest. It's possibly one of my biggest pet peeves, ever. 

Anytime someone uses the phrase* "just kidding" *to attempt to hide a mistake/wrong answer (even though it's completely obvious.) You see it in academic settings the most, I think, or just awkward conversation.

Teacher: "What's 5x3?"
Student: "20."
Teacher: "No, it's 15."
Student: "Oh, just kidding!"

I'm calling BS on this one. You're not kidding- there's no joke there. You're just wrong. 

So now I'm asking...does this run across the board for NTs? Maybe it's an "intellectual" trait to become frustrated like that? Or is it just me, and should I slack off on everyone just a little bit? :tongue:


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## vanWinchester (May 29, 2009)

Hm, I use the "Just kidding" phrase more after jokes or sarcasm, to not make people cry about my "insult". =P 

But yeah, I do see the scenario you described quite often. Seems that people think adding a "Just kidding" won't show when they don't know something. It's probably easier for most people to say that than to actually admit they were wrong. 
Personally, I do not really have issues with admitting when I am wrong. When I REALLY am wrong once, I will gladly admit it. Nobody's perfect (and my name is nobody. Just kidding. =P)


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## Munchies (Jun 22, 2009)

yes this pisses me off to no end, and am not at all afraid of showing it.


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## s1ng4m3 (Jun 29, 2009)

vanWinchester said:


> Personally, I do not really have issues with admitting when I am wrong. When I REALLY am wrong once, I will gladly admit it. Nobody's perfect (and my name is nobody. Just kidding. =P)


Funny, we have the same name?  
But I agree- I don't have issues when I am, quite obviously totally in the wrong, admitting it. Sure, it hurts because I love being right roud:but what's the point in attempting to hide a mistake? Maybe it's an NT thing to not be afraid to admit such mistakes. I know INTJ's tend to be known for being pretty confident in themselves...


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## s1ng4m3 (Jun 29, 2009)

Munchies said:


> yes this pisses me off to no end, and am not at all afraid of showing it.


Thank goodness, I'm not alone. :happy:I actually fight back with these people and just denounce them. Harsh? Yes. Oh well, deal with it.


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## vanWinchester (May 29, 2009)

s1ng4m3 said:


> I love being right roud:but what's the point in attempting to hide a mistake? Maybe it's an NT thing to not be afraid to admit such mistakes. I know INTJ's tend to be known for being pretty confident in themselves...


Agreed. 
And Hell yeah, we can be a bitch to admit mistakes. That's actually a funny way to throw people off. They often expect us to be all "NOOOO I AM RIGHT" (if they know MBTI), so if you wanna have some fun, just say "You know, you are right. I was wrong". Apparently it totally catches people off guard; especially the INTPs. Anyways. =P

Yeah well, my theory is that since many NTs do not really give a shit about what others think of them, we might just have less troubles to say "Yep, I was wrong, so?". We would not care if somebody walked away from us because we "show weakness". A more emotional person will have more troubles with that. Many Fs seem to want people liking them. So they are probably more likely to say that whole "Just kidding" thing, when they realized their opinion was WAY off from the other person. 
But that is just a theory of mine, and I do not really wanna feed any stereotypes here. 

However, people cheaping their way out with "Just kidding" are not exactly...high in my ranks. I like honesty over everything.


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## openedskittles (May 24, 2009)

I don't assume they're trying to hide anything. It's obvious they weren't kidding and you'd have to be a moron not to see that. I just consider it a figure of speech like "oops" for dumb people. I'm not about to stand up and knock my chair over and scream "NO! You were NOT kidding! You were serious and you're also DUMB!" because everyone in the room, including that person, already knows. There are just so many more important things to be angry about.


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

I must admit that I am one of the people you dislike. I do it because I'm already insecure enough without flaunting my intellectual weak points, and it makes it easier for me to interact socially when I can reduce the fear of judgment. Even if I know that the other person knows I'm bad at something, I can at least hold on to the slight hope that he might not have noticed, or might have thought that I messed up on purpose to be goofy. If I don't do this, I become distracted by the yucky feeling in my gut that I get whenever there is total certainty that I am being judged negatively, or that someone's respect for me has suddenly dropped, and I will continue making even more stupid, careless mistakes because I am busy focusing on what the other person must think of me instead of whatever topic we are discussing. As I make more errors because of my nervousness, the feeling of judgment makes me even more distracted, and even more likely to mess up. The "just kidding" thing, while unlikely to be believed, at least prevents this uncomfortable cycle by making me feel like there is a chance it acted as an "undo."


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## Harley (Jul 5, 2009)

I love saying "Just Kidding" a lot because I know it pisses people off, and usually the other person knows I'm not kidding thereby make a statement more insincere and sarcastic than it really is. I also like to use "just kidding" as an intro to a nasty (albeit funny) joke.

*Me:* Wow, that jacket really slims you down.
*Other: *Really?
*Me: *JUST KIDDING! You really just look like a fat fuck:laughing:.


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## slowriot (Nov 11, 2008)

s1ng4m3 said:


> Funny, we have the same name?
> But I agree- I don't have issues when I am, quite obviously totally in the wrong, admitting it. Sure, it hurts because I love being right roud:but what's the point in attempting to hide a mistake? *Maybe it's an NT thing to not be afraid to admit such mistakes.* I know INTJ's tend to be known for being pretty confident in themselves...


it must be an INTx thing then. I dont think I've met an ENTP on this board thats willing to say they made a mistake. In real life I only know one and he would admit to a mistake. But I take it he's just too special and well mannered for him to be an exact sample of the ENTx population.


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## Nightriser (Nov 8, 2008)

openedskittles said:


> I don't assume they're trying to hide anything. It's obvious they weren't kidding and you'd have to be a moron not to see that. I just consider it a figure of speech like "oops" for dumb people. I'm not about to stand up and knock my chair over and scream "NO! You were NOT kidding! You were serious and you're also DUMB!" because everyone in the room, including that person, already knows. There are just so many more important things to be angry about.


Precisely. It's already clear that the person didn't know what he/she was saying, so there's no need for me to get angry. It is slightly annoying, the whole "saving face" reaction, but no need to charge that person. 



shakalaka said:


> I love saying "Just Kidding" a lot because I know it pisses people off, and usually the other person knows I'm not kidding thereby make a statement more insincere and sarcastic than it really is. I also like to use "just kidding" as an intro to a nasty (albeit funny) joke.
> 
> *Me:* Wow, that jacket really slims you down.
> *Other: *Really?
> *Me: *JUST KIDDING! You really just look like a fat fuck:laughing:.


:laughing:


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## jochris (Jul 18, 2009)

"... Just kidding!"

Argh. Shut up. You shouldn't even deserve the ability to speak.


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## s1ng4m3 (Jun 29, 2009)

snail said:


> I must admit that I am one of the people you dislike. I do it because I'm already insecure enough without flaunting my intellectual weak points, and it makes it easier for me to interact socially when I can reduce the fear of judgment. Even if I know that the other person knows I'm bad at something, I can at least hold on to the slight hope that he might not have noticed, or might have thought that I messed up on purpose to be goofy. If I don't do this, I become distracted by the yucky feeling in my gut that I get whenever there is total certainty that I am being judged negatively, or that someone's respect for me has suddenly dropped, and I will continue making even more stupid, careless mistakes because I am busy focusing on what the other person must think of me instead of whatever topic we are discussing. As I make more errors because of my nervousness, the feeling of judgment makes me even more distracted, and even more likely to mess up. The "just kidding" thing, while unlikely to be believed, at least prevents this uncomfortable cycle by making me feel like there is a chance it acted as an "undo."


*sigh*
Now I feel pretty damn horrible. It's not really a respect issue- I don't lose respect for these people. It just irks me (and my liver). I think I'mma work on it...seeing as how the last thing I really want to do is make people uncomfortable and anxious by judging them negatively. It'll help with the whole "you're a heartless wench" thing I get occasionally, as well...


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

s1ng4m3 said:


> *sigh*
> Now I feel pretty damn horrible. It's not really a respect issue- I don't lose respect for these people. It just irks me (and my liver). I think I'mma work on it...seeing as how the last thing I really want to do is make people uncomfortable and anxious by judging them negatively. It'll help with the whole "you're a heartless wench" thing I get occasionally, as well...


 I wasn't trying to make you feel guilty. I know it is a dishonest approach to alleviating my fear, and I would like to stop relying on these little habits. It is like the bedtime rituals I used to have, to ward off nightmares. It got so there was only one position I had ever slept in without having a nightmare, with my wrists safely under the covers, my eyes focused at a certain place on the wall, my plush bunny basket near my head, everything exactly like it had to be in order for me to pretend I was safe. I knew that the nightmares could come even if I positioned myself perfectly, and that I was being irrational, but it was the only thing I could do to feel like I had any control at all. When I try to undo a stupid comment with "just kidding" I know it is an empty gesture, more to ease my own mind than to change anyone else's. It is an attempt to remove the feeling of helplessness when I care about an outcome I can't control.


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## Linesky (Dec 10, 2008)

I Will most likely have a response (unless I'm preoccupied), because I'd just find this a bit 'odd'. 
Because I'd find it more noble to just say 'oh okay' or something, instead of lying about it (which will usually be seen through) --- unless the person knows how to make it sound funny in a way, I guess.

My reaction could range from smirking and going hehe with a possible question mark raised in my head, to quietly saying "liaarrr" (doesn't mean I intend to be mean by stating an obvious truth; I can be sympathetic ), to laughing in their face. -Probably also somewhat depends on my mood...
-> I approached this from how I'd react around my former classmates, and we were a tight and small bunch. Also I'd only laugh in someone's face about it if they've been jerky/annoying/teasing to me before.

If this happened in an aula/with people I don't know very well , I'd probably either ignore it if I'm not paying attention to it or I'd just stare over and have this facial expression that asks "what is he lying for? :-/" [- but eh the answer to that is pretty simple..lol]


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## knght990 (Jul 28, 2009)

I only say just kidding after i said a joke an no one laughed. I say it alot for this reason.
As for when people use it to cover up insecurities, i mostly ignore it and push forward. It usually a good time to switch topics because they don't want to talk about it anymore anyway, so i can get focus shifted onto the task at hand.


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## Ventricity (Mar 30, 2009)

i've become really good at defending those "just kidding" people from nasty INTJs that love nothing more than to point at insignificant faults in error. that's my hidden pleasure


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## Mutatio NOmenis (Jun 22, 2009)

When people do the JK thing, I kinda want to slam them against a wall to find out what they really mean.


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## Lending (Aug 15, 2009)

s1ng4m3 said:


> I have to get this off my chest. It's possibly one of my biggest pet peeves, ever.
> 
> Anytime someone uses the phrase* "just kidding" *to attempt to hide a mistake/wrong answer (even though it's completely obvious.) You see it in academic settings the most, I think, or just awkward conversation.
> 
> ...


You'll be alright, Marie. It's not that deep. :tongue:


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## More Tea (Aug 19, 2009)

I don't like the "just kidding" thing either. It's intellectually dishonest, which I find grating. 

Snail's explanation for a potential motivation behind the phrase makes sense. Thanks for spelling that out. It's much easier not to grit my teeth if I can understand *why* someone is doing something.


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## tsunamictuna (Aug 21, 2009)

Yeah... It's annoying. I agree. But I hear the "just kidding" thing whenever someone wants to soften up a comment they've said to keep it from being harsh or to keep tense feelings from developing..

I just want to be like, "Say what you mean, mean what you say."

& I don't have a problem admitting I'm wrong because I honestly believe... Sometimes it's right to say you're wrong :tongue:


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## rotis (Apr 23, 2009)

lol thread


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