# How About Babies (I think this might be an NF thing)..?



## Traum (Jan 3, 2012)

I adore them. I want children so badly, it's crazy. At least I have friends with babies I can borrow until I get old enough. :happy:

Do you guys like babies?? I am _seriously_ obsessed or something.. :tongue:


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## chasingdreams (Jul 16, 2011)

Yeah, I'm obsessed with babies and I wanted to be a mother until I realized the world already has 7 billion+ people. 

So, I'll probably adopt. That'll still make me a mommy!


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## Angelic Gardevoir (Oct 7, 2010)

I would, but I'd be afraid that I'd do something wrong.


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## Olivia (May 20, 2011)

I think babies are boring. You can have my share of the replacement population or whatever.


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## Traum (Jan 3, 2012)

chasingdreams said:


> Yeah, I'm obsessed with babies and I wanted to be a mother until I realized the world already has 7 billion+ people.
> 
> So, I'll probably adopt. That'll still make me a mommy!


_Exactly_ my reason for the same thing! I'd also like to adopt.


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## Olivia (May 20, 2011)

Another thing is that it's not an NF thing. People of any type may love babies and want to have babies. Or adopt them. Maybe feelers are a bit more emotional about the desire to have children but there are Ts who are into parenthood and darn good at it. SJs are often drawn to family life too. If there's anything that's *not* an NF thing, this is it.


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## Traum (Jan 3, 2012)

Olivia said:


> Another thing is that it's not an NF thing. People of any type may love babies and want to have babies. Or adopt them. Maybe feelers are a bit more emotional about the desire to have children but there are Ts who are into parenthood and darn good at it. SJs are often drawn to family life too. If there's anything that's *not* an NF thing, this is it.


Interesting, thanks.

I wasn't trying to imply other types wouldn't like babies; I know this isn't true. It's just that me and every other NF I know in the face-to-face world (which is like 4 others) are crazy about them. And a friend I have who is INFP and myself want to adopt kids (respectively). My INFJ friend wants to adopt, too.

Thanks for your input. :happy:


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## Olivia (May 20, 2011)

Ah, thanks for the clarification but I still think any of the effusive types, if they like babies and are crazy about them, will seem just as baby crazy as an NF who loves babies.

You're fortunate to have a lot of simpatica NF friends, so maybe that's why it appears an NF thing.

What would be interesting to me is how the NF baby-crazy person expresses herself (or himself) perhaps differently than a person of another type. Or maybe not.

Do some types focus on the innocence of babies, the wonder of small children? Do some types focus more on the cuteness of little baby feet and the sweet smell of their skin? 

Since I'm mostly immune to their cuteness, I have no idea! But it's interesting, none the less.


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## Ace Face (Nov 13, 2011)

I love kids of all ages! They're super fun


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## Traum (Jan 3, 2012)

Olivia said:


> Ah, thanks for the clarification but I still think any of the effusive types, if they like babies and are crazy about them, will seem just as baby crazy as an NF who loves babies.
> 
> You're fortunate to have a lot of simpatica NF friends, so maybe that's why it appears an NF thing.
> 
> ...


For me, it's mostly love and innocence.

Babies will love you if you love them.

Innocence is one of my absolute favorite qualities. Someone who is innocent (baby or otherwise) is immediately high on my likes list. Innocence is just so cute and admirable.

As for cuteness, I suppose it doesn't hurt. I mean, there is the whole "ahhh, it's a little mini-person! so cute!" factor, but it's not the _main_ thing with me, at least.

Two of my NF friends who want kids are guys (INFJ and INFP). They're more into it than my girl NF friends (INFJ and ENFP) are, by far.

Just thought I'd mention that. I want kids the most, though, haha.


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## The Sundancer (Mar 26, 2011)

Yup, I want children. I hope to be a great mom one day, when I am settled and stable and hopefully more mature xD 

Not all of the NFs I know like or want kids (my ENFP and ENFJ friend did not want kids at all) so I think it is more of a personal preference than a type thing. 

My INFJ friend absolutely wants kids though. She is almost obsessed with the idea.


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## Loveternity (Aug 3, 2011)

I love babies, but if they start crying I go "Please calm down..." and if it doesn't work, I have no clue what to do. 

I love kids, they're so simple and innocent. They love you back in a heartbeat if you love them. My 4-year-old sister told me the other day that I'm gorgeous and that she wants to marry me! roud:


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## Murnando (Dec 10, 2011)

I've never really been interested. It seems to me as if the second you have kids your life revolves around keeping them happy right up until they leave home, and I honestly don't want my life to be consumed like that. I don't want to get stuck in a life that involves financially supporting my family and working. I can't think of anything that sounds quite as dull and unfulfilling as that.


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## Traum (Jan 3, 2012)

thanks for more input guys!

And this...


Overflow said:


> I love babies, but if they start crying I go "Please calm down..." and if it doesn't work, I have no clue what to do.
> 
> I love kids, they're so simple and innocent. They love you back in a heartbeat if you love them. My 4-year-old sister told me the other day that I'm gorgeous and that she wants to marry me! roud:


This is so cute! Awww. :happy:


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## The Proof (Aug 5, 2009)

Overflow said:


> I love kids, they're so simple and innocent. They love you back in a heartbeat if you love them.


not like INFJs who drop you like dirty socks "I have enough friends, you are useless to me"


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## SilentScream (Mar 31, 2011)

I prefer children that have already crossed 11 years of age  

Babies are ... hmmm ... I dunno .. too demanding XD I know I'd make a good father, but I won't ever change those diapers !


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## Traum (Jan 3, 2012)

The Proof said:


> not like INFJs who drop you like dirty socks "I have enough friends, you are useless to me"


hmm?? I like INFJs. They're nice people and I've found them to be very loving and friendship-oriented.


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## Luvin Life (Dec 30, 2011)

-The INFJs I've known have been phenomenal long-term friends. 
-Adore babies. Incredibly cute. Appreciate their innocence as well.


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## GoodOldDreamer (Sep 8, 2011)

I like babies and kids except for how gross they are. Really, that's the only thing I don't adore about them. The thought of changing diapers or cleaning up vomit is just... ugh. Nasty. I don't deal with gross well, like at all.

But otherwise, kids in general are awesome. I prefer to be around the ones who are relatively self cleaning, though. It's also easier to communicate with them when they understand and use basic language. P


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## pascal (Jan 5, 2012)

I love babies so much!!!! ...when they smile and laugh I just want to jump over a rainbow haha


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## Geoffrey (Jan 27, 2012)

I imagine there are several things at play in the previous posts (and this one), including age and relationship status. However, the common strand seems to be adoption, which does not surprise me in the least. It's another way of giving/caring.

While 30% of Americans consider adoption, only 2% actually adopt a child. See: National Survey of Family Growth (Jones, 2008, 2009) and the National Foster Care Adoption Attitudes Survey (Harris Interactive and the Dave Thomas Foundation, 2007). Do you think it more common for certain personality types to actually adopt than others? Which?

I don't ask to hold other people's babies, and I hate having a baby jammed in my arms. I know the parents of such children probably think they are privileging me with the chance to hold their child (and that is true). Therefore, I usually validate their behavior. I also don't gravitate toward children, but they seem to gravitate toward me as if they somehow know I'm the sucker that will play Uno (or worse, Pretty Pretty Princess) with them. I see so many kids reach out to adults only to have their hands slapped. How can I say no?

Despite this, I do want kids of my own (2? 3? 4?). However, since I am not the one that actually has to give birth to them, that number is negotiable and subject to change.

In addition to that, I would also like to adopt 1 or 2 children.

Of course, being an INFP, what I want and what actually happens tend not to correspond.

For those of you considering having no children, while you are, of course, entitled to your choice and feelings, you might choose to consider that part of your NF caring-based nature is genetic. Raising caring children can be a gift to the children, you, and the world. Also, do you think uncaring parents make good parents? Caring parents make good parents. They're the ones who try to be good parents.


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## SarcasticBlack (Mar 9, 2011)

I deplore being around children for too long of a time. Children = 16 and under (unless the teen is REALLY mature or something). I have a time limit when it comes to being around my little cousins. After about 10 minutes of playing, I'm really irritated and want to be left alone. Ugh... they're always up in my face with their breath and their dirty toys (and my cousins are very well-behaved and intelligent kids!). 

Even when I was a child, I didn't like to be around other children! 

When it comes to babies, I flat out don't care for them. No sir, not one bit! 

What's sad is that I am fantastic with children. It's just on the inside that I don't like them!


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## Agape (Jan 22, 2012)

Children like me for some reason but don't planning on having my own . I have always say a child can't raise a another child. So I think I will pass...although I will make a good dad but I see it as a big responsibility that you can't delegate..it is a job for life, very noble but it is for life . I respect those that take this path( kudos to you) but have never feel inclined to follow it.


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## Razvan (Dec 17, 2009)

Did anybody else notice that the response rate on this thread for female versus male is like... 3 to 1...or even 4 to 1. Just saying...:crazy:

Me, I love kids, from baby shape...heh, even from conception roud: to any age. You might think, yeah, sure you do, you'll not be the one carrying it! :laughing: True, but I'm probably going to be the one going in the middle of the night looking for a pharmacy or a shop to get some sweets for the mother to be or whatever. roud: It's worth it, babies are cute, when you look in their eyes, it melts your heart and when you get a smile and an innocent laugh from them...it stops my mind. (and that almost never happens, I'm always thinking of something)

My favourite picture of myself is from when I was a baby, plus my parents told me I was a quiet one, so I'm planning to get as many of me as possible. :happy: In fact I'm making that my purpose in life. :tongue: They're the best thing that comes out of love...and honestly I have my parents to thank for teaching me that.


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## amethyst_butterfly (Mar 14, 2011)

I personally think that having kids during these times is tough. My mother has advised me to just have one, and I have taken this very seriously. Life is not the same as before and it concerns me to bring children to a world like this. I have never considered adoption even though is beautiful and I support people who do. 

I prefer to have a baby with my own genes because I am very curious about how that child would be physically and his personality. Is funny how things have changed. I have asked my mother wether she is concerned about me not being married and not giving her grandchildren and her response is "Nah, never marry and dont have kids you are fine". She is an ISFJ.


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## Razvan (Dec 17, 2009)

amethyst_butterfly said:


> I personally think that having kids during these times is tough.


I wonder how they did it in the middle eve, when you had almost nothing to put on the table, there was a lot more poverty back then. I think it matters if you are willing to do this or not, if you want to sacrifice some of your time and life for this, because these days it seems a lot easier to have babies than it was 100 years ago or even less. If you find the rewards greater than the sacrifice, than nothing will stop you. At least that's what I'm thinking.


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## IAmOrangeToday (Sep 30, 2011)

I don't charge around thinking I NEED BABIeZZzZzZz but I often think forward and my ideal of happiness involves a wife whom I adore and a few wee kiddies whom I adore equally. Strange, as I'm teenage and male.


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## leafling (Dec 15, 2011)

Ugh, I have conflicting feelings.

Babies: I don't usually like. I think it's weird how people get all "awwww" around them. I just think, "They don't know who this baby is going to become, he could become someone they despise or an evil dictator or something!" 

Kids: I usually don't like them. I mean I hated kids when I was a kid, they were so mean to me! There are a few that I end up liking, they're usually the sweet, quiet ones. 

Having kids: No, no, no! Well, sort of. There is a part of me that is curious to see what it would be like. There is a part of me that would like to raise kids that would be smart, caring, open-minded. I want to read kids bedtime stories because my parents never did. But at the same time, I don't know if I could handle the pressure and the suffering. I already have a messed-up family and I don't want to bring anyone else into this mess. I think I'd probably be a good aunt. I'd cherish my nephews/nieces and try to instill them the values I hold important. I'd try to make them into people that make the world a better place. But I wouldn't have to suffer so much? No, if they're my brother's kids I'd care a lot for them and suffer for them, too....

I don't know. This is all so confusing. And the world is overpopulated, anyway! I also feel like if I have kids, then I have to sacrifice my life and dedicate all my time to them. I don't know if I'm capable of that. Maybe I'm being selfish...*sigh*

I say no to having kids, but it's a weird no.


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## geekofalltrades (Feb 8, 2012)

I think I'm a bit selfish in the childhood arena. I'm an extremely private person, and my ideal of happiness is finding one woman who I can fall in love with and then, essentially, never talking to anybody else ever again. I always choose relationships based on how attracted I am to my partner, and I feel that a relationship ought to be _about_ you and your partner. My impression, from having (obviously) been a child and having observed other parents, is that, when you become a parent, you relationship becomes about your children, rather than each other.


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## zallla (Oct 11, 2011)

Traum said:


> I adore them. I want children so badly, it's crazy. At least I have friends with babies I can borrow until I get old enough. :happy:
> 
> Do you guys like babies?? I am _seriously_ obsessed or something.. :tongue:


I totally relate to this, I've been wanting to have children of my own since I was 5 or 6 and watched _ER_ (with my mum), I loved every episode that had pregnant women having babies ^_^ 

And I basically raised up my little brother who's 10 years younger than I am - our parents wasn't doing it very well so I felt I had to do it but I also enjoyed it very much, he was (_is_) so sweet


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## chickydoda (Feb 12, 2010)

It was always my life mission to have kids, and be a good mother, but realistically its probably not a good idea.

-Theres a lack of clean water in the world
-House prices have gone up a lot, I don't think my kids will ever be able to afford one once they are grown
-The world is already overpopulated enough as it is

Personal reasons
-There's a history of depression in my family- in my immediate family alone, 4/5 of us have mental illnesses
-I have bipolar disorder, and I only seem to hear bad things about mothers with bipolar. It sucks.
-I would probably have trouble disciplining anyone
-I have trouble looking after myself, and my dog, how on earth would I look after a child, or six? I hate getting up at 7am to feed him (he determines my waking times, by jumping over the bed and doing whatever he can to get my attention)
-I get irritated quickly
-I don't think I could afford to financially support another human being
-It might hold me back from my dreams of travel and running my own business

Maybe I will adopt one day- if I'm not discriminated against. I'm pro life though, so if I accidentily got pregnant, I'd keep the baby.

Its kind of hard thinking about dating and relationships lately, because kids is such a big factor in discussing the future. I want them, I just don't think its a good idea.


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## E_N_T_P (Aug 9, 2011)

So... who wanna make babies?:bored:


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## chickydoda (Feb 12, 2010)

Plus, I'm scared of throwing up when I'm pregnant, and giving birth.

I have lots of qualities that would make me a great mother, I would have like 20 if this world were a better place, and could support that, but I think its better to have none at this stage.


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## MCRTS (Jul 4, 2011)

liz25 said:


> I seriously dislike babies. They don't do anything except cry all the time, they are completely dependent on you for everything, and they are boring. I don't mind them when they get older (around 1.5 or 2) when they start interacting more, but as for little babies, I am not a fan...I should probably get my tubes tied or something because I am at that fertile age...gag me.


I don't like babies too, but I don't see how kids or toddlers are any better. Sure, it's less of the pooping and peeing, but more of the hyperactivity, acting out, and sassing back.


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## bellisaurius (Jan 18, 2012)

I like having a kid (just shy of 1yr right now). It's a hoot to watch someone with an actual blank slate go at things. Plus, I consider it a good thing to propagate and teach the next generation.


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## Aelthwyn (Oct 27, 2010)

I can't say I'm all that fond of babies. I like kids generally, but have always been rather wary of babies. Yeah yeah, they can be cute, although I don't think they're half as cute as a lot of people make them out to be, and sorry, but not ALL babies are cute. Some are pretty funny looking. Maybe some of this is my bias towards hair. I like hair - long hair preferably. People look wierd without it. lol, strange, but yeah I think this does play a part in my non-interest in them. Anyways, that doesn't change that I've always wanted to be a mother, and I'm sure I'll be one of the gushy-est mommies out there whenever that happens, but otherwise I don't really get interested untill they are at least toddlers. Babies are kinda boring, and I really don't enjoy all the clean-up of dipers and mushy food. And it's often hard to know exactly what they want or need, so I sometimes feel at a loss, and feel anxious about whether or not I'm really taking care of them how they want or need. I won't refuse to hold them when people seem to want me to, but I don't go out of my way for the chance.


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## bellisaurius (Jan 18, 2012)

@Aelthwyn


> but otherwise I don't really get interested untill they are at least toddlers.


I find this to be very true. Cuddling's OK and all, but interaction is way more fun. 



> but not ALL babies are cute. Some are pretty funny looking.


A lot of them do definitely get into that uncanny valley where the look human, but not quite right. Plus, without hair, any oddness in their head shape pops right out at you.


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## skylit (Feb 17, 2012)

I like babies ok 
and they usually like me 
but I don't want that responsibility!


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## Bast (Mar 23, 2011)

Definitely NOT an "NF thing."


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## Dania (Oct 31, 2009)

I some what like babies. Its a short term thing for me. 

Babies are too permanently dependent. And I am only temporarily dependable.

I would make an awesome godmother I am sure ^.^


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