# Why do children like me?



## Amelia (Aug 23, 2015)

I've always noticed that young children automatically gravitate towards the person in the room that is paying the least attention to them. I've never liked children much, and don't pay much attention to them, but I will always be nice if they try to talk to me. However, they ALWAYS seem to want to follow me around.

I'm currently thinking of this topic, because my brother and his 7 year old daughter with down-syndrome are living with me temporarily. His daughter won't stop babbling about me and always demands that I come and spend time with her 24/7. Everyone else in the household always showers her with attention, except for me.
I feel awkward around her, because she can't talk much and I can't really relate to her.

Why is this? Is it because children are so narcissistic that they demand attention from everyone, and will pursue the person who gives them the least attention so they can feel affirmed? Discuss your thoughts/opinions.


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## Amy (Jan 15, 2015)

Amelia said:


> I've always noticed that young children automatically gravitate towards the person in the room that is paying the least attention to them. I've never liked children much, and don't pay much attention to them, but I will always be nice if they try to talk to me. However, they ALWAYS seem to want to follow me around.
> 
> I'm currently thinking of this topic, because my brother and his 7 year old daughter with down-syndrome are living with me temporarily. His daughter won't stop babbling about me and always demands that I come and spend time with her 24/7. Everyone else in the household always showers her with attention, except for me.
> I feel awkward around her, because she can't talk much and I can't really relate to her.
> ...


There's something you do to attract children. Maybe you act differently than the people around you that deal with children.


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## lavendersnow (Jan 13, 2016)

I feel the same way about kids. I show them no attention because I find them irritating, yet they follow me around even though I'm not doing anything to acknowledge them. I think they see you ingnoring them as a challenge and they want to be validated by adult-figures, especially one's they percieve as older/above them.


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## ae1905 (Jun 7, 2014)

I've noticed this happens with animals...for example, one time I was outside, reading, when a small bird landed on my lap and stood there for several seconds, looking up at me...I think he was attracted by the fact I seemed to be completely oblivious to and unconcerned about my surroundings (I was)...the existence of a creature that could be (in its mind) so indifferent to his safety probably baffled and intrigued him, and prompted him to come take a closer look...I've also had strangers' dogs saunter up and nonchalantly brush against me to attract my attention (from my reading material)...and I had cats that tried to attract my attention when I ignored them...like the bird, I think the dogs and cats were intrigued by a creature that appears to be so comfortable in his environment that he lowers his guard and ignores it...I think they interpret it as alpha behavior and alphas attract attention


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## Rhonda Rousey (Sep 22, 2015)

You're an adult woman and kids gravitate towards you cuz they feel comfortable with your presence.


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

Kids desire everyones attention usually in general. I doubt its anything special about you. But about seeking your attention because your not giving it.

Your brothers kid (in other words YOUR niece). 
I do not think the children in this example sound anymore self involved then the adult. (just saying). To each their own. I dont think you have to be a kid person. Everyone is not always kid people. Or animal people etc etc. But geesh.

I mself dont consider myself an all around kid person as in ops kids. But I have never understood that crowd who almost speaks of children in distain in itself. 

Your niece likely wants your attention because your her aunt if its regarding you. In general yes she is a child and seeks the attention of people in general. And needs validation and communication. Alot like how you created a post to interact with other humans on discussing concerns relevant to your own life and thoughts. Children require interaction in life as well. They are not cognitively developed tho so they at least have an excuse when they act juvenile and immature about communication.


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## uncertain (May 26, 2012)

Sensational said:


> Kids desire everyones attention usually in general. I doubt its anything special about you. But about seeking your attention because your not giving it.


I doubt this... because I didn't when I was a kid. I tended to stay in the background.

Maybe I can answer the OP's question because I remember doing so as a kid. Somehow it felt like the person who was by himself/herself was more approachable, and adults socializing in a group intimidating. I don't know why, maybe simply because of the "sheer" size of human mass. I was also afraid that the adults would get mean/angry with me if I interrupted their conversation.

Sometimes it's out of curiosity, and sometimes the fact that the person was alone was a thing I immediately found relatable, because I was always by myself, too. And, because I also thought of myself as an easy-going kid, I thought that person to be easy-going, nice to talk to, too.

But no most of the time I didn't approach people, quiet or loud.


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

uncertain said:


> I doubt this... because I didn't when I was a kid. I tended to stay in the background.
> 
> Maybe I can answer the OP's question because I remember doing so as a kid. Somehow it felt like the person who was by himself/herself was more approachable, and adults socializing in a group intimidating. I don't know why, maybe simply because of the "sheer" size of human mass. I was also afraid that the adults would get mean/angry with me if I interrupted their conversation.
> 
> ...


Kids as in general not you individual. I did not speak for every individual child.

Your comparing your childhood needs to a down syndrome child. 

By all means its chic to be blase about children so as I said to each their own. But I did answer the op from my view. As you did you.


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## Riven (Jan 17, 2015)

Rhonda Rousey said:


> You're an adult woman and kids gravitate towards you cuz they feel comfortable with your presence.


Adult male, but can't really explain why children gravitate to me. Then again, I don't look that old.


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## NipNip (Apr 16, 2015)

I handle kids like tiny adults. I don't mind observing them and analysing their behavior, it's quite interesting. Apart from that, not a big fan.

I can relate thoug, OP. I think... because they think I'm kind, funny, smart, myseriously more quiet, different or something. It's odd because I don't really do much and yet they always like me. I'm not even being particulary kind to them, I prefer to be real to children. Contrary to their 'fake' parents.

The same sort of happens to me with people overall. I don't do much, really... Yet they like me. I figured it's gotta be the Ne-Fe combo (as an INTP).


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## Amelia (Aug 23, 2015)

NipNip said:


> I handle kids like tiny adults. I don't mind observing them and analysing their behavior, it's quite interesting. Apart from that, not a big fan.
> 
> I can relate thoug, OP. I think... because they think I'm kind, funny, smart, myseriously more quiet, different or something. It's odd because I don't really do much and yet they always like me. I'm not even being particulary kind to them, I prefer to be real to children. Contrary to their 'fake' parents.
> 
> The same sort of happens to me with people overall. I don't do much, really... Yet they like me. I figured it's gotta be the Ne-Fe combo (as an INTP).


That's pretty much how I treat children. I always use a regular-pitched voice with them and probably say things that they're not used to hearing. Mostly because I don't know the normal way that adults relate to them. 
Also, they may be attracted to us because INTPs can appear to be warm on the outside, even though they are typically detached and don't pay them any mind.


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## MisterPerfect (Nov 20, 2015)

Amelia said:


> I've always noticed that young children automatically gravitate towards the person in the room that is paying the least attention to them. I've never liked children much, and don't pay much attention to them, but I will always be nice if they try to talk to me. However, they ALWAYS seem to want to follow me around.
> 
> I'm currently thinking of this topic, because my brother and his 7 year old daughter with down-syndrome are living with me temporarily. His daughter won't stop babbling about me and always demands that I come and spend time with her 24/7. Everyone else in the household always showers her with attention, except for me.
> I feel awkward around her, because she can't talk much and I can't really relate to her.
> ...


Are you lonely? Perhaps they sense your loniliness. I have two kids I babysit sometimes and they seem to adore me. I not entirely sure why but they never stop talking about me to thier parents. I am very good with children though and I tend to be very patient so they can jump, and run, and yell and drag me along and I can keep up with them. Some people are annoyed with that but I honestly dont understand how anyone can be annoyed with children. Children are such angels. I remember I use to always bug the person who was alone or had no freinds as a kid, and I think children can be very perceptive. Its funny since a girl came that was very much younger and more outgoing. She was 12 but the kids were really getting on their nerves and the two boys seemed very insistant on bothering me instead and said they didnt like her. I suprised since I would think they would like her better but they seem to always want my attention and I have such a reserved personality but children have always loved me. People always think im such a sweetheart.


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