# How do you tell the xxFJ types apart??



## Callie Rose (Sep 13, 2011)

Hi, all.

So, yeah. I'm pretty sure I'm a xxFJ type or a xSFP, but I'm leaning towards ExFJ. What ares some good, practical ways to tell the differents between Fe-Si and Fe-Ni. (Real world examples would be lovely!) Anyway, thank you and I look forward to hearing what you guys have to say!

Callie Rose


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## LiquidLight (Oct 14, 2011)

Well Si is much more oriented to the here and now (or an established precedent). Si is much more about how the person approaches the situation he's currently in. Ni projects often way into the future and is almost completely uninvolved in the here and now, that's what Se is for.

ENFJs are a little more in the clouds than ESFJs as a result I think. They're probably much more willing to examine an issue from multiple perspectives (even as Fe-doms) to make sure their conclusions, especially those they intuit for other people are sound. There is also something about the ENFJ, they have a knack for knowing just how to approach a situation, person or group in an effective way. ESFJ in contrast often has to make an evaluation of a situation based on something they've already been through. If there's any intuition with ESFJ its going to be Ne-like (what could come of this), which is why its so critical for them to have a well-developed auxiliary-Si or else Fe+Ne is a nasty duo.

ENFJ who ignored Ni on the other hand, would probably get into compromising situations (or addictions or some physically related issue) without taking enough stock of how this situation might turn out. Fe+Se (with weak Ni) is the quintessential manipulating the system behind the scenes to get something, then indulging, then maybe feeling guilty about it if it doesn't conform to some social standard (because Ti is in the inferior so what's logical doesn't really factor either). ENFJ public figures who get in compromising situations (like ENFJ preachers who get caught in adultery) or ENFJs like Tony Soprano (who probably uses Ni reasonably to get around getting caught) but vacillates between loyalty to the group and personal indiscretion (note the Se way he takes care of business too, but he requires a psychologist to make sense of it all - inferior Ti). Some people call Tony Soprano an ESTP but I think he's too good at knowing how to push people's buttons and much too group affiliated. The Godfather Vito Corleone is another ENFJ, as was Martin Luther King and Billy Graham. 

xSFP would make you a Se-dom with Fi so that's something else completely. xSTP would make Fe (or adherence to set external value judgments) low or non-existent on your priority list, even though you'd recognize those standards you'd probably be somewhat inconsistent and awkward with applying Fe (especially ISTPs).


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## Callie Rose (Sep 13, 2011)

The funny thing is that I'm good at applying Fe with people I like and with strangers and colleagues, but around kids my own age, I'm not - I often put my foot in my mouth and end up saying something a little callous or that I'll regret. I also tend to put on a tough face when I'm stressed or around people I don't like because I hate seeming weak. I've been told that if I were to ever go to a therapist, I would need someone who wasn't touchy-feely because otherwise I would "probably eat them alive". How would that relate to functions and how to apply them to my type? It's a bit frustrating being the only person in my life I can't type...


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## LiquidLight (Oct 14, 2011)

Callie Rose said:


> The funny thing is that I'm good at applying Fe with people I like and with strangers and colleagues, but around kids my own age, I'm not - I often put my foot in my mouth and end up saying something a little callous or that I'll regret. I also tend to put on a tough face when I'm stressed or around people I don't like because I hate seeming weak. I've been told that if I were to ever go to a therapist, I would need someone who wasn't touchy-feely because otherwise I would "probably eat them alive". How would that relate to functions and how to apply them to my type? It's a bit frustrating being the only person in my life I can't type...


Maybe ESTP. Sounds like your Fe is somewhat inconsistent. I'm curious as to what you would define as "looking weak" or "eating someone alive."


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## Callie Rose (Sep 13, 2011)

I like to be the best. And I like to be composed, and on top. Period. The end. I want to be the badass and the one that people find alluring and fun to hang out with, as well as not as much of a goody-goody as people think I am. I just don't like it when people think they can take advantage of me or pull one over me. Let's see, what else? I hate failure and am scared sick of it (enneatype 3 for certain), and I hate crying in public or at all, but it does happen sometimes if I have an angry outburst when people are being exceedingly frustrating.

By "eat them alive", my friend Liz probably meant that I would explode around someone who was all, "How does that make you feel?" I'm bad at pinning down my emotions sometimes. It gets complicated. 

My image is a little too ingrained with everyone around me, but in new situations, I'm put-together, talkative, pleasant, desperately scattered, sarcastic, up for fun, and generally agreeable unless I'm poking fun at something I think is stupid. I can say things that could be seen as insulting without meaning to. I put my foot in my mouth almost as much as my ExFP sister does. O.O


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## LiquidLight (Oct 14, 2011)

Yea probably not a Fe-dom for you. I would think maybe ESTP. The whole thing about people pulling one over on you, sounds like you're suspicious of your own ability to gauge people via intuition. An intuitive would probably have something of a sixth sense about whether or not someone was being genuine. Se-doms basically intuit by perception, they read expressions, body language, etc to get a sense of a person (which of course only goes so far, as a Ni-dom I get really annoyed when someone only takes a superficial evaluation of something).


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## Callie Rose (Sep 13, 2011)

LiquidLight said:


> Yea probably not a Fe-dom for you. I would think maybe ESTP. The whole thing about people pulling one over on you, sounds like you're suspicious of your own ability to gauge people via intuition. An intuitive would probably have something of a sixth sense about whether or not someone was being genuine. Se-doms basically intuit by perception, they read expressions, body language, etc to get a sense of a person (which of course only goes so far, as a Ni-dom I get really annoyed when someone only takes a superficial evaluation of something).


It sometimes frustrates me that I can get a good read on someone and know I'm right and then they outright deny it (cough, cough, ESTJ mother). I like body language because it's reliable and hard to be misinterpreted, once you know the signs. I've been told before that my intuition could be really good if I trusted it more. I tend to get more weepy, emotional, and apathetic about work and what I love when I'm stressed; when I'm happy I'm good with people, can roll with just about anything, and am a lot harder to break.


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## LiquidLight (Oct 14, 2011)

The Form of the Inferior - ESPs

Any of this sound familiar?


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## Callie Rose (Sep 13, 2011)

Practically perfect in every way. That's a little scary, actually.


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## Mendi the ISFJ (Jul 28, 2011)

Callie Rose said:


> The funny thing is that I'm good at applying Fe with people I like and with strangers and colleagues, but around kids my own age, I'm not - I often put my foot in my mouth and end up saying something a little callous or that I'll regret. I also tend to put on a tough face when I'm stressed or around people I don't like because I hate seeming weak. I've been told that if I were to ever go to a therapist, I would need someone who wasn't touchy-feely because otherwise I would "probably eat them alive". How would that relate to functions and how to apply them to my type? It's a bit frustrating being the only person in my life I can't type...


maybe ENFJ, my sister is INFJ and shes much more controlled with her feelings that I am


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