# How do you feel about someone flirting with your partner?



## conformità (Mar 14, 2010)

do you find it offensive towards him/her and feel the need to defend their honour?.. do you feel angry? or do you trust them and are completely fine with the concept?


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

I can see people's motives and hidden drives a little too easily. One time in college, there was this slutty girl that liked to hang around everyone's boyfriend. She lived with a boyfriend, yet she still slept around in our department with others. She was very plain, a little overweight, and the type that would stay last at a party hoping to get the attention and sex from the drunk guys. 

I totally trusted my boyfriend with this girl. But her behavior was annoying and disrespectful _to me_ at times. There were times where she would talk about oral sex with my boyfriend and exclude me from conversation. My boyfriend wasn't the brightest crayon in the box either so he'd be pretty oblivious to her slutty flirtations. 

One time at a party, I notice he left with her. I lived in the same complex as the party. I went to my apartment and the both of them were there in my pad. He was getting a beer (my special beer) for her out of my fridge. He really could be a dumbass (he's an ex, mind you). Anyway. I said nothing except "hey I was looking for you." Slutty girl left and went back down to the party. I had to have a little talking to with my boyfriend. He (ISTP) told me he felt neglected because I was being a social butterfly so he left with slutty girl because she wanted to try our kind of beer. A squabble between us ensued. He ended up leaving and going home to his place. Not good. All over a dumbass ugly slut. I problem with him wasn't that I thought he would do anything with her, but he did give her one of my expensive high grade craft ales. Lol.

Because I like to call tramps out on their shit, whether they are doing it to me or doing it to their friends, I spoke up. I went back to the party. I saw the girl from across the room and zeroed in on her. She was sitting down and in the middle of a conversation witho someone next to her. I was sat down across the room from her. And then I said her name in my strong teacher/parent voice "XXX, I want you to quit it." And everyone in the room got quiet and looked at us. She looked at me innocently and said "Excuse me?" And I wasn't buying it. I said, "You with XXXX(my boyfriend). I know what you are doing and I don't like it and it's going to stop right now, got it?" She stared around the room at everyone looking at her. She started to say something in protest like "But I haven't...." And I cut her off and said "Don't. I know what you are doing and it's going to stop." Then she finally dropped the act and nodded towards me. 

Then I eventually left the party. But most of the women were grateful. I found out later that she had passed herpes along to a few people in the group. Oh those stupid drunk victims. Men beware...


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## conformità (Mar 14, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> I can see people's motives and hidden drives a little too easily. One time in college, there was this slutty girl that liked to hang around everyone's boyfriend. She lived with a boyfriend, yet she still slept around in our department with others. She was very plain, a little overweight, and the type that would stay last at a party hoping to get the attention and sex from the drunk guys.
> 
> I totally trusted my boyfriend with this girl. But her behavior was annoying and disrespectful _to me_ at times. There were times where she would talk about oral sex with my boyfriend and exclude me from conversation. My boyfriend wasn't the brightest crayon in the box either so he'd be pretty oblivious to her slutty flirtations.
> 
> ...



i completely agree with you there, it is completely disrespectful and im glad she caught herpes!!!!!!


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## CristianLuca (Mar 22, 2010)

Every woman should be a "slut", their only chosen man's "slut".


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## WickedQueen (Jun 1, 2009)

I'm not really good at handling jealousy. Not because I felt insecure, but because I would felt insulted. When a women flirting at my boyfriend, I would feel insulted because she dare to do that, like she's openly confronted me and belittling me as his girlfriend. When my guy doesn't reacted like the way I want him to react, like firmly ignored the flirts, I would get angry, because I feel that he doesn't appreciate me as much as I want to be appreciated.

And when I don't get what I want, well... trust me, you don't want to know the rest.


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## Ryan (Sep 6, 2010)

Ive never had to directly deal with it, but as it stands right now, I don't think I would bat an eye lash. I wouldn't "date" someone, or "be with" someone unless I felt 100% sure about us. Trust is HUGE for me. And i'm a good judge of character, so If I trust her (and clearly by saying that I really do understand the meaning of trust) then flirt away. But if you're too forward and make her feel uncomfortable / touch her and she doesn't like it (hopefully she'll still stay in control and tell you to fuck off) and doesn't feel in control, I'll break your face. Just sayin.


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## Rationality (Jul 8, 2010)

If some woman were flirting with my partner right in front of me, I'd be more than a little pissed off -- it's just rude behavior. If she were flirting with him in private, I guess I wouldn't blame her for trying.


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## Aßbiscuits (Oct 8, 2009)

CristianLuca said:


> Every woman should be a "slut", their only chosen man's "slut".


That wouldn't make an awful lot of sense considering slut means someone who sleeps around with more than one man.

Anyway, my girlfriend isn't very friendly to people, they'd be too scared to flirt with her :laughing: so I never found myself in this situation with her. Boys will flirt with her a lot though, ones that don't know we're together and she'd just blank them :laughing:. 

However my exes, it drove me fucking crazy when boys flirted with them, especially since they were in the closet. When they flirted back I couldn't say "back off she's mine" so that was pretty painful. I couldn't stare them down, I just had to stand there and act like her friend.


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## PulpFictionFan (Jul 12, 2010)

My answer would completely depend on the circumstances. 

If my relationship was going real well and heading straight up, then I hope whoever had the balls to start flirting with my girlfriend has real good life insurance and protection. At first, I'd tell them to back off and try to put him in check but if they kept at it, then that poor motherfucker is getting introduced to mr. Louisville Slugger. Then he's going to end up looking like Darth Vader for the rest of his life.

If my relationship was going real shitty then I wouldn't give a damn if my GF was flirting was somebody else or vice-versa. When things are going bad, start looking for a new partner, it's as simple as that. Get some lifelines or look for a plan B when things start going down the drain. If things are already bad, then why try to mend that relationship unless you've got a damn good reason to do so?

If my relationship was going somewhat good, somewhat bad, then fuck it. Let's me and her flirt with whomever we want to, whenever we want to. In my relationships, if both me and my partner aren't completely satisfied with who we're with, then we need to start looking for somebody else because something might be wrong and we could end up going nowhere fast in our relationship.

I want my partner to have complete satisfaction with me as her BF or ditch me. I cannot tolerate failure in anything, including in my relationships.


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## Drewbie (Apr 28, 2010)

My girlfriend is adorable when she flirts with other people. :laughing:


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## Neon Knight (Aug 11, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> I found out later that she had passed herpes along to a few people in the group. Oh those stupid drunk victims. Men beware...


Ladies beware, this could be _your_ man coming back home with herpes.


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## brigon (Sep 9, 2010)

I've gotten into a bunch of fights because guys would come up and start flirting with one of my exes and I refused to let them do that.


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## Thrifty Walrus (Jul 8, 2010)

It would depend how much I trust my partner. But since I would never be with someone I didn't trust I would probably find it funny.


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## killerB (Jan 14, 2010)

If someone started to flirt with my wife, I would sit back and let her take care of it. She is fully capable of cutting someone off at the knees if she so chooses.

I am not the jelous type, and have learned long ago that you can't keep someone tied to you if they don't want to be there. If someone does not care enough to shut down a flirt when they are with another, then they show no respect for that other person. I won't accept being treated that way.


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## Goodewitch (Mar 4, 2010)

Well, I would never find it funny, thats for frikken sure. Think about it, if you're standing there, and someone comes up and flirts with your partner in front of your face, its like an insult, almost a direct challenge. Ok, you may not want to start a fight over it, but you sure as hell should feel the implied disrespect from the flirter to you.
I would always nip that in bud, excuse myself with a glare that shows my disapproval, and hope that my partner follows suit. If he has enough respect for me, he will blank any attempts by a flirter, if he doesnt and lets the flirter carry on , oblivious to my discomfort and the implied insult to me, I will turn on my heel, and leave him where he stands. I wont have a partner that pretends to play all innocent and clueless as to when they're being flirted with.
I will also be telling that partner that if it happens again and he behaves in the same way, we will be over and done with. I dont put up with that kind of nonsense in my life. Life is tough enough without added drama and BS from outside forces.
G. x


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## Neon Knight (Aug 11, 2010)

Goodewitch said:


> Well, I would never find it funny, thats for frikken sure. Think about it, if you're standing there, and someone comes up and flirts with your partner in front of your face, its like an insult, almost a direct challenge. Ok, you may not want to start a fight over it, but you sure as hell should feel the implied disrespect from the flirter to you.
> I would always nip that in bud, excuse myself with a glare that shows my disapproval, and hope that my partner follows suit. If he has enough respect for me, he will blank any attempts by a flirter, if he doesnt and lets the flirter carry on , oblivious to my discomfort and the implied insult to me, I will turn on my heel, and leave him where he stands. I wont have a partner that pretends to play all innocent and clueless as to when they're being flirted with.
> I will also be telling that partner that if it happens again and he behaves in the same way, we will be over and done with.


Amen! 


Goodewitch said:


> I dont put up with that kind of nonsense in my life. Life is tough enough without added drama and BS from outside forces.
> G. x


Speaking from experience, ain't that the truth!


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## bionic (Mar 29, 2010)

I rarely get jealous so I would have no issues with it at all. If the woman gets out of line, I would make my mark to show her who he goes home with at night. If she continues, I would expect him to assert himself and lay down the iron fist. If he does not, then it is obvious that I mean nothing to him.

Now if my man gets jealous; that is another thing. It is his onus and something I would forgive if he had the humility to admit his feelings to me. I don't mind jealousy if he is able to be opened about it. That would only gain my respect even more and I would work with him to hopefully improve that issue in our relationship.


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## PoppyPeedOnMySofa (May 31, 2010)

If I'm secure enough in the relationship, I have no problem joking around about it. I don't know if she'd be happy about it, but if she expects me to become some caveman and throw her over my shoulders because some guys were flirting with her, she's got the wrong fella.


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## OmarFW (Apr 8, 2010)

I suppose it depends on the response my partner gives


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## USAirlinesLetter (May 25, 2011)

When somebody's flirting with my partner, id just remain silent as if how i wish silent minds can kill. hahaha


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