# Socially Awkward yet Attractive people



## iChelsea (Feb 5, 2010)

I consider myself sort of attractive yet I'm very sociallly awkward.

I feel uncomfortable intiating things, I'm very passive and would like others to take the lead. Therefore, if I am locked in my dorm room, I will stay there because doing otherwise requires me to intiate conversation.

Are there a lot of people like this?


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## Erbse (Oct 15, 2010)

Welcome to the world of introverts.

Though some are more extreme than others in regards to their level of isolation.

EDIT: You might want to read through the stickied "5 misconceptions about introverts" in this forum section.


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## ENTrePenuer (Jun 12, 2010)

Don't you think it's a bit... insane to have your real name in your signature?


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## Erbse (Oct 15, 2010)

ENTrePenuer said:


> Don't you think it's a bit... insane to have your real name in your signature?


While it indeed is insane to a degree it be more weird for people to actually start facebook stalking now :mellow:


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## Raichan (Jul 15, 2010)

I'm sorry if this is out of topic, but I loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove guys who are more socially awkward than I am :crazy: as long as they have the personalities, character and energies I like


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## Alaya (Nov 11, 2009)

I'm very socially awkward. Most of the times I have no idea what to say to others, except for "hi" and "bye". 

This is a problem when I notice other people that are interested in me, I just keep to myself most of the times and others think I'm being rude. That's why I think I need to practice on my small-talk.

Therefore:

Hi everyone, how's the weather?roud:


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## mnemonicfx (Sep 5, 2010)

Iconoclastic Visionary said:


> Hi everyone, how's the weather?roud:


How are you?

A few people called me cold, emotionless, heartless, awkward, antisocial, anything that you can think of.

But, I've seen people worse than me.


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## Vaka (Feb 26, 2010)

Erbse said:


> Welcome to the world of introverts.


Being introverted doesn't mean you're socially awkward and being socially awkward doesn't mean you're an introvert.


Anyway, yeah I'm quite a bit socially awkward also. I think a lot of people are, though.


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## Erbse (Oct 15, 2010)

Paranoid Android said:


> Being introverted doesn't mean you're socially awkward and being socially awkward doesn't mean you're an introvert.


Yes, but you will still be labeled by other people, and typically that stamp reads social awkward :tongue:


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## Alaya (Nov 11, 2009)

mnemonicfx said:


> How are you?


Doing well, how about you sir?



> A few people called me cold, emotionless, heartless, awkward, antisocial, anything that you can think of.
> 
> But, I've seen people worse than me.


I'm actually not bad at socializing if there's a fixed topic of conversation and I know what kind of mood I'm dealing with. The trouble starts at informal situations, then I'm screwed.


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## Vaka (Feb 26, 2010)

Erbse said:


> Yes, but you will still be labeled by other people, and typically that stamp reads social awkward :tongue:


IDK...I had always been pretty quiet, though no one seemed to label me as socially awkward. Just quiet.


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## Apollo Celestio (Mar 10, 2010)

I can't really tell, because not a lot of women I know are socially awkward and I'm asexual anyway. Other than that, I can only think of a few more socially awkward dudes than myself, and they kind of have this roller coaster with women they like.


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## mnemonicfx (Sep 5, 2010)

Iconoclastic Visionary said:


> Doing well, how about you sir?


Fine... anything new?



Iconoclastic Visionary said:


> I'm actually not bad at socializing if there's a fixed topic of conversation and I know what kind of mood I'm dealing with. The trouble starts at informal situations, then I'm screwed.


I could be similar like that. But, I don't like formal situations, it gives me pressure.
In informal situations, I couldn't be random.


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## viva (Aug 13, 2010)

Oh my god. My best friend knows this guy at school who I've ended up hanging out with a few times.. and he is the perfect example of this. He's _such_ a cutie, and is super fit because he's a swimmer, but he's so damn awkward! I personally find it adorable, though. He's always apologizing every 5 seconds and is just extremely awkward conversationally. But I think it's so entertaining and I love interacting with him just because I never know what he'll say. Needless to say, I have a slight crush on him :mellow: I think he's an INFP, too.


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## icarus1984 (Mar 9, 2010)

Unstructured social situations suck!


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## Linus (Apr 27, 2010)

vivacissimamente said:


> Oh my god. My best friend knows this guy at school who I've ended up hanging out with a few times.. and he is the perfect example of this. He's _such_ a cutie, and is super fit because he's a swimmer, but he's so damn awkward! I personally find it adorable, though. He's always apologizing every 5 seconds and is just extremely awkward conversationally. But I think it's so entertaining and I love interacting with him just because I never know what he'll say. Needless to say, I have a slight crush on him :mellow: I think he's an INFP, too.


they're great ♥

I had one too, as a roommate ! Blushes ALL the time XD
A little moody though


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## Hiccups24-7 (Oct 17, 2009)

Up until the age of around 25 I was quiet socially awkward but by then I'd met more people, had a few relationships so I had some experience with it and time to say "hey I really need to get over this already it's stupid" . Even if the whole time before 25 I was mostly nervous (except when drunk which people seemed to love) I managed to see the good in me and that I can be confident at least with talking about things I'm interested in, I can maintain an interesting conversation that is also fun if I'm in the right frame of mind. 
The past few years I've felt like I know myself better and have more self confidence which I would say has helped a great deal. I feel a little more extroverted for it as well. I don't dread going out as much though I'm still picky with when (have to be in the perfect mood to do so) and it needs to be planed so I can psych myself up for it. 
I've never thought of myself as attractive (too much of a perfectionist in that area which I'm ok with) but these days I get hit on a lot more and the conversations are more interesting but I don't know if that is more because of just me, getting older (experience) or having more self confidence or a combo deal. Sure I still have my moments and love alone time but when going out now I'm not so prone to nervous awkwardness. I think for me I wanted to be a part of the fun and group vibe so much instead of sitting back listening that I made it happen... or at least start to happen. I think for me it's more about the inner beauty that shines that really captures peoples interest.. just being quiet and pretty will get you so far and I guess some are content with that but I'm glad to be making changes.
I used to be intimidated by attractive people but I don't think I am any more I'd say more by intelligent people as I don't feel I can keep up with them and be interesting enough for them.. though one of my ex house mate/best friends (entp) was like that but he placed more worth on having fun and humour than anything else.. which is perfect in my eyes. We fit together well and when you find something like that there is no hard work and it just flows.


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## sudeepkulkarni (Nov 8, 2010)

Well, most of the introverts are like that. I can see that someone is trying really hard to get my attention, but I won't talk to him unless he/she takes explicit initiative. In my college, my friends tell me how difficult it was merely to get my attention, let alone friendship


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## The Unseen (Oct 26, 2010)

I don't know if I'm attractive. I mean, I've been told that I am, but I have no idea. I don't even consider that about myself, or other people really, I'm more attractive to personalities then appearances. If you think I'm pretty, good for you. But the socially awkward part, yeah I am. More like I try to avoid it, because I don't know what is expected of me in social situations, therefore I usually end up screwing it up. I'm more comfortable with myself, or a close friend, rather then a large group.


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## SeekJess (Nov 1, 2009)

No I don't think it is weird, I am like a introvert magnet... I am always pursuing people, initiating friendships, relationships. I always thought of myself as more socially awkward for being the go getter, kind of gal, lol.


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## SyndiCat (Oct 2, 2010)

ENTrePenuer said:


> Don't you think it's a bit... insane to have your real name in your signature?


My given name and surname is displayed for everyone to see in my nickname and signature. 
How insane is that? They might actually find www.gulesider.no, type in my name, find my 
home address and phone number, and harrass me at no end. Oh God no, say it ain't so. 

I'm pretty sure no man on this board has the balls to show up on my door, for whatever 
reason that may be, grudge or sexual, and certainly no woman would dare do it. So why 
care? Besides, with a little digging anyone could find my IP and trace it back to me...


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## Linus (Apr 27, 2010)

I think this thread was made asking if it is possible that a beautiful/handsome person can also be socially awkward.


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## Jwing24 (Aug 2, 2010)

I met a guy while at a camp in college who was a track athlete. He was obviously attractive to the opposite sex. But he was very awkward, to everyone. 

I have always been introverted and socially awkward. I don't consider myself attractive (I will go with average). So I think you can be 0/10 or a model 10/10 and feel both. A big part of it is yourself and also I think the people who you are around. How do those people make you feel? 

Around certain people I am less awkward and a little more talkative.


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## Pyroscope (Apr 8, 2010)

I've been called attractive, but I often doubt it a lot... I think the fact that no girl I was interested in ever seemed to notice me when I was younger got me into the mindset that I wasn't. I kind of presumed that you could be quiet and a little awkward but if you were attractive then they'd still show some interest because of that part of you, Idk, I'm probably just finding more ways to torture myself.
I think the worst part is that I'm inconsistent. Some times I can interact easily, but most of the time my awkwardness makes my brain freezes and I can't do conversations 'cause my brain will only offer weird humour in response to most things. Developing conversations just fails because no suggestions come into my brain.
So yeah, not only am I socially awkward, sometimes I'm not, just to make it easier for people to assume I'm just anti-social and difficult. Which I find it hard to blame them for...


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## wisdom (Dec 31, 2008)

I'm "reasonably attractive," which means I'm not happy about my appearance but some people like it and nobody seems to go "Eeew." My social skills, on the other hand, are bad by any standard. I think that gap complicates life for me, although it's better than being ugly and socially inept. Edit: I think some people are surprised to find out that the outwardly polished-looking person who was approachable then is weird and intense or finds me unthreatening and appealing enough to describe me as "shy" when it's more that I want to be left alone. Friendly women might be more likely to have the latter impression. Here's maybe the key, to be applied to many "reasonably attractive" to downright good-looking people who are awkward: looking that way (making an effort) due to inner compulsions and/or a desire to impress one special stranger and not caring much about connecting with all the rest. Famous example re the original question and second mention of him tonight: Rick Springfield.


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## Choptop (Nov 20, 2010)

I consider myself fairly attractive, I used to model. I'm an INTJ. I'm literally practically a robot, socially. 80% of the people I meet believe I have no emotions. I'd rather be this way than the opposite though.


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## Maiden (Mar 19, 2010)

Yes, I am socially awkward as well. I find it very hard to start a conversation or to talk to people about certain issues. Although, I would not consider myself to be attractive, but I have had people say positive things about my appearance.


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## Biracial (Sep 8, 2010)

iChelsea said:


> I consider myself sort of attractive yet I'm very sociallly awkward.


I am an introvert and a loner. When I've told people that I'm a loner they don't believe me and are shocked if they do. Same deal with telling people I don't like socializing. 

I don't act the way I look and that is the power of stereotypes i guess.


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