# You know you're sp/so/sx last when...



## Octavarium (Nov 27, 2012)

You know you're sx last when...
You hardly ever get excited about anything.
sx doms talk about "Merging" and you don't know what that's like, but it sounds horrible.
You are very cynical about "follow your passions" type speeches, because being passionate about what you're doing doesn't strike you as all that important.


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## Shadowlight (Dec 12, 2012)

I'm new to the blind-spots because I was too busy only looking at sx/sp for myself until now. My take is that 

when:


someone asks you to describe what you just ate, all you can say is "It was good. It's food. Good nutritional value"
meeting someone is a much greater priority but where you're meeting doesn't matter as long as you can talk peacefully
you get so caught doing / reading something really exciting in the evening and realize that you have to go to work within four hours the next day and still think that four hours of sleep is enough to have a productive day because your job is also exciting
you have to set reminders to take your medication otherwise you forget and sometimes even ignore the reminder
an sp-dom calls you careless and self-negligent and you have no idea what they're talking about because you feel you're doing a good enough job (I'm still alive, right?)


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## OrangeAppled (Jun 26, 2009)

so last...

- You're unaware of all of your social failures until they begin to impede meeting your sp & sx drives (uh oh... I have no network to find work or an SO!). You didn't even know you were on the outside looking in.

- You don't care about who is dating who or whatever dynamics are happening between people in a group. You don't even really understand these dynamics; it all looks silly to you. Often, you're oblivious to it all. You only pick up on intimate dynamics between you & someone else. 

- You'd rather be excited by someone than comfortable with them. Being comfortable in a group is dull & tedious. You either want to be alone or enraptured by one person.

- You have trouble seeing the value of "reputation", have little to no awareness of your own rep, and don't put much stock in acknowledging others' reps (taking people at face value - sometimes to your detriment)

- You're unaware of your own influence on a group, and you may inadvertently become a leader because you unwittingly send out some signal that you're willing/able to do it

- You're a loner, and it's not just because of shyness... 

- You've never been a part of any clique or social circle & you've never cared to be. You've only ever needed/wanted one intense connection with someone, and lots & lots of space

- You can be widely known & active in a community of sorts, but not be a part of any circles within it. You're always on the fringe, keeping people at arm's length without even meaning to. Your purpose for being in a group is never to become a "part" of it

- You're neither suspicious nor trusting of people. You tend to respond to them according to how interesting they are to you & how interesting you are to them. 

- You blur lines when it comes to social categories.

- You're hot or cold, with little inbetween. You tend to talk at people in a disconnected way or magnetize & become magnetized, but casual interaction is hard.

- You refuse to get involved because you can't see the point of it

- It's almost impossible to snub you because you neither care nor even really notice

- Politics are a big snooze fest

- SO types can seem full of BS

- You may assume people do/don't like you more than they do because you don't notice or understand signs of approval/disapproval

- You have to be careful not to always be a voice of dissent. You often fail to grasp the bonding processes people use to form social connections, so you don't jump on the "consensus bandwagon". You unwittingly make yourself an opposing force, someone for people to band against


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## Cassieopeia (Jan 9, 2012)

OrangeAppled said:


> so last...
> 
> - You're unaware of all of your social failures until they begin to impede meeting your sp & sx drives (uh oh... I have no network to find work or an SO!). You didn't even know you were on the outside looking in.
> 
> ...


ALL OF THIS

Except politics, I'm pretty passionate about that. I think it's my 2w1 desire to make life better for people. I only think of it in terms of how it could improve the lives of individuals.

Besides that, I can relate to all of this. I never even understood how I was such an outcast in groups yet didn't really care * (just curious) until I realized I'm so-last and figured out what that meant.

* I only cared about being an outcast from groups _if _I couldn't make a connection with even one person. Like you, I don't care about being a part of a group.


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## Cassieopeia (Jan 9, 2012)

You know you're so-last when...

- You literally have no idea how to become connected in groups of people, only to individuals.
- You don't even see how that matters.
- You got frustrated when, on college apps, they emphasized _so much_ on being involved in groups.
- You don't give a flying fuck about social status and don't care what society wants. (I am sx + have aux Fe, so I am easily hurt when _one person_ doesn't like me.)
- If you go to a party and find yourself "connected" with only one person for the whole time, that's completely satisfactory.


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