# INFJ and intimacy



## Samarra (Jan 9, 2010)

Do INFJs typically move VERY slowly in terms of physical intimacy? I've been dating an INFJ guy and after several dates we're still at the cuddling/kissing phase. I'm used to the guy moving things along but I'm wondering if I should take the lead at some point.


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## knittigan (Sep 2, 2011)

Mine did in the early days of our relationship. I do think that he liked taking things slowly, but I do also know that he struggled with overthinking things and being worried about upsetting me if I didn't want him to touch me and there was a sense in which that made him very hesitant to initiate a lot of the physical things that he was ready to do with me.

I started taking the lead for a while and that seemed to work for us. Once he got comfortable with me and learned how to read me, he got much more comfortable with initiating that kind of thing, so it might be a good idea to try initiating things with him and see what his response is.


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## musicalpyramid (Feb 2, 2009)

I would echo knittigan's thoughts. I doubt very much that he isnt ready to be more intimate with you. He may however be very hesitant about coming across as being too pushy or rushing you, and risk losing you in the process. He wont think ''i'll just take a chance and move things along'' - if he likes you enough he wont want to risk you that way. He'll probably want to avoid coming across as 'only being after one thing'. But chances are with a little nudge from you to reasssure him that you are ready he will take the hint and you can take the next step together.


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## Samarra (Jan 9, 2010)

Thanks guys. He's honestly the sweetest guy I've ever dated - he's so into me and really cares about making me happy. I'm not used to any of it and I keep feeling like there has to be a catch. I'll nudge him along on the physical aspect.


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