# Attraction . . .



## flyintheointment (Jun 15, 2009)

What attracts you to someone? (personality)


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

There is already a thread for this topic, although it is not NF-specific and does not exclude shallow forms of attraction. 
http://personalitycafe.com/sex-relationships/4469-attraction.html


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## Kokos (Dec 28, 2008)

Then that would be ..

Honesty,
Authenticity, 
Wisdom, rather than "intelligence", someone who thinks well and in the good direction.

And i guess that's it.. :happy:


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## Roland (Jun 1, 2009)

Kokos said:


> Then that would be ..
> 
> Honesty,
> Authenticity,
> ...


wisdom is a huge turn on.

women that enlighten me usually get my attention even before they enlighten me, there must be some sort of sparkle in their eyes. it only sucks that the majority of them are much older and often have rings on their fingers or kids by their sides. shlame. its no wonder women get with older men.


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## Arioche (Aug 5, 2009)

Dedication (to anything really)
Willpower (something I don't have, and honestly respect)
Open mindedness/accepting (to others' opinions, not blinded by hate/conviction/discrimination)
Authenticy (to be who they are, and act as they are)
Having their own personal principle, and sticking to them.
Passion (but not too overwhelming, or we'll never get out of emotional state)

Also, I have no idea but somewhat troubled/melancholic people attracts me. (<--Knight Complex all the way.)


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## Viktoria2 (Feb 15, 2009)

*Someone who can save you even when you didn't know you needed saving. 
Encouraging, caring, thoughtful. 
Can make me stay focused when I need to actually finish a project of idea. 
Someone who isn't boring, and isn't a jerk, and someone I can feel completely safe around, because quite often I don't feel safe, and i can't be myself. Mainly someone I know won't let me down, like trustworthy..

Ah yes, only in dreams. *


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## peterpan2k (Jul 7, 2009)

I see attraction is a self-resolving puzzle, a jigsaw with a sense of direction. 

One could even say there are hundreds of factors in the attraction equation. But I believe there is the _major fives_:

> _A moment in time_: When, in early life, you are touched in a special way by someone. Any of the qualities that resemble that person would trigger an emotional memory, and cause attraction. 

>_ Inner beliefs_: What you believe is who you are. When you find someone with the same beliefs as you, intellectual curiosity is aroused in the form of attraction. 

> _The Hero Syndrome_: People who excel in something you hold valuable captive your admiration, and attraction. 

> _Sexual_: I believe it to be less of what it's made out to be. Sexual attraction is instinctual. Animals follow instinctual urges for reproduction. Humans also abide to the same natural elements of physical chemistry (Smell, rituals, physical quality and youth).

> _Soul_: I, for one, believe we are more than mere animals. Personal instances led me to evaluate the existence of soul attractiveness. When you just can't explain it, but you know you love them. It feels like they are your soul mate...

I personally like the last one most.


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

- Extroversion
- Quirk
- Eloquence
- Good manners
- Ambition
- Spontaneity
- Good nature

I also like strong characters, bland people bore me.


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## flyintheointment (Jun 15, 2009)

peterpan2k said:


> I see attraction is a self-resolving puzzle, a jigsaw with a sense of direction.
> 
> One could even say there are hundreds of factors in the attraction equation. But I believe there is the _major fives_:
> 
> ...


Great list.


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## matilda (May 21, 2009)

Authenticity. Yes.

As long as the inside matches the outside, we're good.


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## JojoGopher (Aug 1, 2009)

Authenticity: No faking!
Integrity: Sticks to her beliefs and morals.
Contemplative: Something needs to be going on beneath the surface.
Playful: Must enjoy life, but not be a total clown.
Capable: Able to act independently, at least for a while.
Respect: Both for self and for others.
Compassion: Cold hearts don't cut it.

I could let a few slide, but missing too many ruins it for me.


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## babblingbrook (Aug 10, 2009)

authentic
mysterious
wise
empathetic
magical

I dunno but I guess INFJ seems to fit the bill


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## BehindSmile (Feb 4, 2009)

I love men that can cook and take care of themselves. I know it means they can take care of me. I love doing things for my man, but I like knowing that since I'm a fragile person, he'll be able to take care of me.

But wit...dorky wit. I love it. I'm talking good wit and even cheesy wit.

Me- "Gah I'm so hot!!"
Guy- "Yeah you are"

Nerd. Total Nerd, but I love it. I'm attracted to computer geeks...

I just explained my boyfriend. Is that pathetic?


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## firedell (Aug 5, 2009)

My list is too long to mention.


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## OrangeAppled (Jun 26, 2009)

Kind, thoughtful, compassionate
Sincere and genuine
Intelligent and insightful
High morals and strong integrity
Passionate
Witty and silly
Friendly and engaging
Imaginative
Appreciates culture and the arts

Being hot doesn't hurt :tongue:


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## Ronald Lewis (Aug 13, 2009)

I'm strongly attracted to women that are sweet, kind, down-to-earth, and humble.


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## Zegaray (Jun 17, 2009)

OrangeAppled said:


> Kind, thoughtful, compassionate
> Sincere and genuine
> Intelligent and insightful
> High morals and strong integrity
> ...


I agree with your post, and someone else on the first page mentioned, ambition. I like that one to in a relationship.


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## thehigher (Apr 20, 2009)

depth. wisdom. mystery. patience. love. playfulness. engagement. calmness. balance.


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## HollyGolightly (Aug 8, 2009)

Loyal - I need to know he's got my back and that he only has eyes for me. I need trust and security.
Strong-willed - I like a person with inner-strength
Compassionate - somebody who understands emotion and is kind hearted.
Wise - I want somebody who I can learn things from.
Accepting - I don't want them to try and change me.
Deep - I want to have meaningful conversations.
Quirky - I like someone who's different and isn't afraid to be a little bit strange.
Talkative - I'm a listener, so I need someone who is good with verbal communication.

Like this person even exists! :sad:


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## JojoGopher (Aug 1, 2009)

HollyGolightly said:


> Loyal - I need to know he's got my back and that he only has eyes for me. I need trust and security.
> Strong-willed - I like a person with inner-strength
> Compassionate - somebody who understands emotion and is kind hearted.
> Wise - I want somebody who I can learn things from.
> ...


Of course we exist! You just described the best qualities of us INFPs! Well, the wise and talkative part may or may not ring true for all of us, hehe!


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