# One night stands



## Ungweliante (Feb 26, 2009)

As it so happens, I got thinking about ONS. 

Personally I think that the sex is usually bad-to-average, but not good. I enjoy them most because of the novelty factor - finding out about how a new person looks like and acts in that situation. After quite some of them I have started feeling emotionally drained, though, and nowadays want to connect with the other person emotionally as well as physically. That way, the passion can be much deeper and more fulfilling. Still, each ONS represents a story and is, in a way, an adventure.

What do you think about ONS? Have you had many of them? Do you find them good, bad or just feel indifferent about them? :happy:


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## thehigher (Apr 20, 2009)

never had one. but im pretty sure i could break down the person's type and act like their anima/animus for the few minutes i have with them. it turns me on when the other is turned on .


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## N^G (Apr 30, 2009)

If all both parties are looking for is sex, then there really isnt a problem. If one of the parties is looking for something more than that then yeah, it could become an issue. But you are smart enough to know all this :tongue:


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## Robatix (Mar 26, 2009)

Last year, I had an accidental one night stand when I started to cry after having sex on the first date. It made the girl I was with feel uncomfortable, so she left and didn't call me again.


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## N^G (Apr 30, 2009)

Why did you get upset as a result of getting sex on the first date?


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## MajesticPlayer (May 13, 2009)

I Dont know about crying but I bet you know how bad it feels right after you orgasm and realise this isnt the person you want to be with (for guys atleast). Guess the Physical factors just take you over on a ONS


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## moon (Nov 29, 2008)

Gross. I am not happy with my past encounters. When I think of them I feel so stupid, & embarrassed.


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## Happy (Oct 10, 2008)

Lets just say that one night stands for me are for street creds. jkjk 

Na, only happened to me once when I was drunk at a party. I regret it since it reached my mom. I was underage back than. yikes!


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## decided (May 17, 2009)

I've never had a ONS.

Emotional connection is hugely important for me. But I know other people don't need the same emotional element that I crave.

I'm kinda curious about what it's like to be able to enjoy the physical without the emotional, and move on the next day. I just know it's something I would not get through completely unscathed!


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## hotgirlinfl (May 15, 2009)

I have never had a one night stand,I don't think I would either,it wouldn't be very meaningful to me


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## Syn Exquisite (May 18, 2009)

I have had quite a few ONS. They all have been hot, b/c most girls that don't mind ONS, aren't up tight and a bit freaky.


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## Ungweliante (Feb 26, 2009)

What do you mean by freaky? :happy:


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## Syn Exquisite (May 18, 2009)

They don't just lay there and go "oooouuuhhh ahhh, yes yes yes!". Things such as, watching porn and hentai while copulating with your partner. Rough sex like choking, spanking really hard, she likes her hair being pulled while being taken from behind. Doing it on top the hood of my car at 3 am in the morning in front of her apartments. She's more aggressive and moves like a female pornstar does in XXX films. Language is also more graphic. Toys, lots of lube, and tossing each others salade are part of foreplay.


Uhh is this part of the forum 18yrs and up? I dont feel right typing this stuff out if middle school kids are allowed in here.




Ungweliante said:


> What do you mean by freaky? :happy:


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## Ungweliante (Feb 26, 2009)

Oh this is interesting.

What do you get from pulling a girl's hair during sex? I mean, how is it a sexual thing for you? What do you think when doing that and why do you feel the need to? :happy:

I can understand passion very well. I also like the whole dressing up part of BDSM, but I'm not that much into BDS and definitely not into M.


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## TheHappyMinority (Nov 3, 2008)

sexual stimulation without an emotional connection? I have a good imagination and a hand for that...


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## Perseus (Mar 7, 2009)

*Sex and the City*



Ungweliante said:


> As it so happens, I got thinking about ONS.
> 
> Personally I think that the sex is usually bad-to-average, but not good. I enjoy them most because of the novelty factor - finding out about how a new person looks like and acts in that situation. After quite some of them I have started feeling emotionally drained, though, and nowadays want to connect with the other person emotionally as well as physically. That way, the passion can be much deeper and more fulfilling. Still, each ONS represents a story and is, in a way, an adventure.
> 
> What do you think about ONS? Have you had many of them? Do you find them good, bad or just feel indifferent about them? :happy:




Do you live in the city or are you very discreet? In small town England, bad reputations (real or lies) can really have a bad affect on income and social oppportunities. The Guards SJ protect their vested interests. 

I do not do it for policy reasons. But holidays is different. 

Stone Free (ESFP) ?


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## Ungweliante (Feb 26, 2009)

Perseus said:


> Do you live in the city or are you very discreet? In small town England, bad reputations (real or lies) can really have a bad affect on income and social oppportunities. The Guards SJ protect their vested interests.
> 
> I do not do it for policy reasons. But holidays is different.
> 
> Stone Free (ESFP) ?


Who cares about reputation?

I'm myself! Some people won't like it, some people will. Why would I try to impress the people who don't like me as myself? :happy:


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## Syn Exquisite (May 18, 2009)

lol us INFPs and NFs in general i think are a bunch of horn dogs.



TheHappyMinority said:


> sexual stimulation without an emotional connection? I have a good imagination and a hand for that...


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## Syn Exquisite (May 18, 2009)

You don't like a little bit of hair pulling? Some girls really like to feel dominated and some guys like the feeling of dominating their girl. Which makes sense b/c its traits of masculinity and femininity.



Ungweliante said:


> Oh this is interesting.
> 
> What do you get from pulling a girl's hair during sex? I mean, how is it a sexual thing for you? What do you think when doing that and why do you feel the need to? :happy:
> 
> I can understand passion very well. I also like the whole dressing up part of BDSM, but I'm not that much into BDS and definitely not into M.


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## musicalpyramid (Feb 2, 2009)

decided said:


> I've never had a ONS.
> 
> Emotional connection is hugely important for me. But I know other people don't need the same emotional element that I crave.


Same for me - never tried and wouldnt for the same reasons


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## Xtrato (Aug 18, 2009)

i think it comes down to self-respect , and Integrity.... 

if you want to have a one night stand ..

a: you are really horny 
b: you are DRUNK! , and well .. you cant crontrol yourself
c: you are trying to escape some type of reality trough sex-stimuli 
d : your partner is not satisfying you , which ding ding , sounds like dangerous waters to me... ( i mean obviously... if you are sleeping with someone else... then duh )

But its how you see yourself ... are you just going to give your physical spirit to a whatever person... i think todays society are loosing some type of moral stand... i wouldnt like to date a person who i had just met and was willing to "do it" on the same date... not me at least..... 

But hey! , like they say whatever tickles your pickle!... Just make sure that when you look back at it doenst make you feel guilty .. or that sort of thing ..


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

In a compelling article for the Beverly LaHaye Institute, Janice Shaw Crouse eloquently answers Schillinger’s challenge. A study at the University of California, San Francisco (UCSF), demonstrated that the production of oxytocin varied among women according to the level of distress and anxiety or the degree of security in their relationships. Crouse goes on to say that women who had fewer negative emotional relationships in their lifetime experienced greater oxytocin production with higher responsiveness; the corollary being that those whose relationships were not grounded in loving, trustworthy, considerate and selfless behavior found it increasingly difficult to bond.

Crouse follows through with a caution that resonates with compelling truth: “sex with the right person [your long-term mate] produces a psychochemical cocktail that can yield absolute, unconditional and uninhibited love for each other (orgasm causes levels of oxytocin to increase 3 to 5 times above normal)…to casually “hook up” is to risk short-circuiting all future relationships. The chemical reaction that takes place during orgasm prepares the body and heart for a relationship. When the relationship does not develop, the person’s bonding ability and ability to trust is undermined.”


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## amanda32 (Jul 23, 2009)

Sometimes a girl just needs to get laid.
That's my two cents.


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## In a Quandary (Dec 26, 2009)

There are fewer things that disgust me more. But you of course, are entitled to a different opinion.


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## amanda32 (Jul 23, 2009)

In a Quandary said:


> There are fewer things that disgust me more. But you of course, are entitled to a different opinion.



yes, I am.


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## In a Quandary (Dec 26, 2009)

Were I to commit such an act, it would feel like a deliberate violation of my soul. Sex, for me, transcends the merely physical into the spiritual. It is closest thing to surmounting the barrier of individual isolation and merging with our fellow souls that we humans, in our limited consciousness, can achieve. To lay the soul bare to one another. Considering the amount of trust involved, it would be impossible for me to engage in such an intimate act frivolously - as is the very definition of one night stand. (At least until the day my beloved and I are bestowed with telepathy. In which case, I would happily forgo sex altogether and seek psychological union with them.)


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## amanda32 (Jul 23, 2009)

In a Quandary said:


> Were I to commit such an act, it would feel like a deliberate violation of my soul. Sex, for me, transcends the merely physical into the spiritual. It is closest thing to surmounting the barrier of individual isolation and merging with our fellow souls that we humans, in our limited consciousness, can achieve. To lay the soul bare to one another. Considering the amount of trust involved, it would be impossible for me to engage in such an intimate act frivolously - as is the very definition of one night stand. (At least until the day my beloved and I are bestowed with telepathy. In which case, I would happily forgo sex altogether and seek psychological union with them.)



It's good you feel that way. But please consider, that sometimes, for some people relationships are hard to find and while we all want the ideal some of us just get lonely. 

I doubt anyone but the "jock" is proud of his one-night stand.


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## Mikbert (Jul 19, 2009)

Have I ever had a one night stand?

lol, how do you think I lost my virginity?


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## In a Quandary (Dec 26, 2009)

amanda32 said:


> But please consider, that sometimes, for some people relationships are hard to find and while we all want the ideal some of us just get lonely.


Do one night stands assuage this loneliness?


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## amanda32 (Jul 23, 2009)

In a Quandary said:


> Do one night stands assuage this loneliness?


Loneliness was just one example of why someone might have them. 
Sometimes, it's just about attraction and sex. And it's fun, and it's good.

But yes, I have found that they have.
Plus, in a one night stand you get to take your own pleasure without having to feel guilty. 
You can try different lovers, find what you like and what works for you.

I'm not saying you *should *do it. Of course, there are risks involved but words like "disgusting"...well,
it comes across as a little judgemental for those of us who have had them.


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## In a Quandary (Dec 26, 2009)

amanda32 said:


> Of course, there are risks involved but words like "disgusting"...well,
> it comes across as a little judgemental for those of us who have had them.


My apologies if I came across that way. I was merely stating my opinion on the subject. But it is only my opinion - the opinion of an insignificant, anonymous Internet stranger - and it ought not be the cause of offense.

As I had mentioned earlier, you are entitled to your own differing views.


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## amanda32 (Jul 23, 2009)

In a Quandary said:


> My apologies if I came across that way. I was merely stating my opinion on the subject. But it is only my opinion - the opinion of an insignificant, anonymous Internet stranger - and it ought not be the cause of offense.
> 
> As I had mentioned earlier, you are entitled to your own differing views.



We are NOT "insignificant"!!! (this is an inside joke).:wink:


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## Angerona (Feb 2, 2010)

Well I must admit they are not my style ..
I kind of had one..but I still ask myself what was I thinking ..
I tend to connect with the other person emotionally and only sex does nothing for me, and after I feel just used and lonely .. But people are different and I'm not judging anybody ..


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## fribblesandyoko (Nov 15, 2009)

moon said:


> Gross. I am not happy with my past encounters. When I think of them I feel so stupid, & embarrassed.


O I can relate on that one :sad: I blame the alcohol haha


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## Perseus (Mar 7, 2009)

*Holiday*



fribblesandyoko said:


> O I can relate on that one :sad: I blame the alcohol haha


*Best to do it on holiday. 
*


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## Scylla (Dec 29, 2009)

i love how so many people used the word "disgust" and its variants. it's interesting.

and it's a very accurate word.


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## Perseus (Mar 7, 2009)

*Bad Taste in my Mouth*



Scylla said:


> i love how so many people used the word "disgust" and its variants. it's interesting.
> 
> and it's a very accurate word.


I don't get disgusted (word use), I get a bad taste in my mouth which amounts to the same thing. Gust = tatse rather wind.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

How do I view one night stands? "Nobody gets hurt in a one night stand as long as the both of you get off." 

However, me personally? I have to be careful. I have had full on relationships with people that should have remained one night stands. I had a one night stand that lasted for two years. Yick. Wolf arm??? For 2 years??? Crazaaaay........

So ONS are pretty much a thing of the past for me.

HOWEVER:


Syn Exquisite said:


> They don't just lay there and go "oooouuuhhh ahhh, yes yes yes!". Things such as, watching porn and hentai while copulating with your partner. Rough sex like choking, spanking really hard, she likes her hair being pulled while being taken from behind. Doing it on top the hood of my car at 3 am in the morning in front of her apartments. She's more aggressive and moves like a female pornstar does in XXX films. Language is also more graphic. Toys, lots of lube, and tossing each others salade are part of foreplay.


Wow!!!! Where and what part of the world do you live ??(keep the toys, though.)

The above is NOT BDSM. It is art. Especially if it's only mild choking we're talking about. HOT.



moon said:


> Gross. I am not happy with my past encounters. When I think of them I feel so stupid, & embarrassed.


I'll say this again. Don't be embarrassed by anything. Your past is part of who you are today. Integrate your life's lessons and move on 'wid yo bad self".



TheHappyMinority said:


> sexual stimulation without an emotional connection? I have a good imagination and a hand for that...


Yes, but you can also use another person's body to masturbate. Just sayin...


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## amanda32 (Jul 23, 2009)

oops, posted on the wrong board!


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## Perseus (Mar 7, 2009)

*Southwick Kebab*



pinkrasputin said:


> How do I view one night stands? "Nobody gets hurt in a one night stand as long as the both of you get off."






This is simply NOT true. Ghengis Hunt causes trouble all around. Everybody to their own taste in the Zoological gardens.


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