# Do you feel like you don't fit in?



## Ronia (Jan 29, 2015)

Do you feel weird and that you don't fit in? I do, and I feel it often and a lot. I was wondering if it is because I am an ENFP, but ENFPs are normally charming, so this confuses me. I was wondering which personalities often are/feel misunderstood


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## JTHearts (Aug 6, 2013)

I'm most likely an INFx and I definitely feel like I don't fit in. I've been left out my entire life.


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## EccentricSiren (Sep 3, 2013)

I definitely do not fit in. Unless it's with other weirdos.


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## Ronia (Jan 29, 2015)

I was thinking more like my example here, I saw in a magazine a woman put shrimp in the pole that holds the curtains and peed in a shampoo bottle at her ex boyfriends place to get revenge and I laughed at it and said to one of my "friends" that I thought it was crazy and hilarious and how on earth did that woman get such crazy ideas and all of a sudden my "friend" asks me why would I want to do that and concluded that I was crazy, but I in no way implied that I ever would do anything that crazy and people always expect the worst from me :s she still hang out with me, but I felt uncomfortable with a person who doesn't know me  things like these happens all the time, they can seem like just random misunderstandings, but they happen a lot  I'm a very kind, warm hearted pacifist who would never hurt anyone in any way, so I have no idea why people thinks that  I think it might be because I dress kinda slutty ( No! Fashionable  ) and I do wear a lot of makeup, but I still dont know


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## Notus Asphodelus (Jan 20, 2015)

I tend to see people as an impermanent source of comfort. In other words, they are only the visitors in my life. They may come and go as and when they like. They may choose to stay if it suits them. As long they don't hurt me either physically or mentally, I have no problem being left to my own devices. If I want to talk to them over a cup of coffee or just hanging out, I will go to them.


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## aendern (Dec 28, 2013)

Define "fit in."


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

I used to be preoccupied with this when I was younger, now I don't really seem to care.


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## Grandmaster Yoda (Jan 18, 2014)

emberfly said:


> Define "fit in."


The Earth is round. Circles go in round holes. The question is "are you circular?"


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## Ronia (Jan 29, 2015)

I wish I was ready for having that strength! It's so impressive and I believe most people can achieve that if they really want to, but somehow at the moment I feel like I need stability in my life  if had so much instability (which is my own fault actually lol  I'm too spontaneous and restless sometimes) that for a while I've felt the need to find people to trust and rely on, but it's so hard to find people who can understand some parts my personalty and my actions, but in my eyes most of people seem weird in my eyes and I in theirs  I tdon't know why it is like this


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## aendern (Dec 28, 2013)

Grandmaster Yoda said:


> The Earth is round. Circles go in round holes. The question is "are you circular?"


I doubt that's the question.


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## Ronia (Jan 29, 2015)

emberfly said:


> Define "fit in."


Do you feel like other people see you as batshit crazy?  that's kinda what I mean


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## Grandmaster Yoda (Jan 18, 2014)

emberfly said:


> I doubt that's the question.


It's asking you whether or not you relate to your coworkers on a superficial and insignificant level.


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## Ronia (Jan 29, 2015)

Grandmaster Yoda said:


> The Earth is round. Circles go in round holes. The question is "are you circular?"


 XD ahaha


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## aendern (Dec 28, 2013)

Ronia said:


> Do you feel like other people see you as batshit crazy?  that's kinda what I mean


In this case, no


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## Notus Asphodelus (Jan 20, 2015)

Grandmaster Yoda said:


> The Earth is round. Circles go in round holes. The question is "are you circular?"


I think I'm more of a doughnut, which reminds me I'm hungry.


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## SweetSunshine7 (Jan 28, 2015)

I do feel this way all the time. I always thought the weirder the person the more honest and brave they are. Even just a beautiful woman with an expressive way of dressing or wearing beautiful make-up can cause insecure woman (girls) to attack with little rude comments or bullying. Unfortunately most people like to follow the herd making it harder for Unicorns to feel good about themselves. They attack things that don't blend in. I personally like the Unicorns which I feel at home with and admire.

Don't worry, people who think your weird are probably insecure. 

Haha...peeing in an ex boyfriends shampoo, that is funny!


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## Ronia (Jan 29, 2015)

SweetSunshine7 said:


> I do feel this way all the time. I always thought the weirder the person the more honest and brave they are. Even just a beautiful woman with an expressive way of dressing or wearing beautiful make-up can cause insecure woman (girls) to attack with little rude comments or bullying. Unfortunately most people like to follow the herd making it harder for Unicorns to feel good about themselves. They attack things that don't blend in. I personally like the Unicorns which I feel at home with and admire.
> 
> Don't worry, people who think your weird are probably insecure.
> 
> Haha...peeing in an ex boyfriends shampoo, that is funny!


Yeah, right? xD I was thinking the same!  but she wasn't attacking me, it was like she had this whole other world in her mind, where she expects me to be crazy :/ I think she was a little insecure, but I don't think that's what makes her think such things, but I honeslty have no clue  as I said, this happens a lot and often, it's mainly small things like this and I have one friend that is very normal and doesn't see me like some alien from outer space  she also says it's weird people always thinks weird things about me  maybe it's something I do or my squeaky voice, I'm awesome, but people sometimes make me wonder whether they are weird or I am


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## stargazing grasshopper (Oct 25, 2013)

emberfly said:


> I doubt that's the question.


You might also choose to doubt whether planet Earth is round, because it's round appearance is somewhat dependent upon one's location while observing the planet. 
As to whether circles go into round holes, that's dependent upon whether the circle has a lesser diameter than the diameter of the hole.


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## aendern (Dec 28, 2013)

stargazing grasshopper said:


> You might also choose to doubt whether planet Earth is round, because it's round appearance is somewhat dependent upon one's location while observing the planet.
> As to whether circles go into round holes, that's dependent upon whether the circle has a lesser diameter than the diameter of the hole.


Such a great response )


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## Narcissus (Dec 18, 2014)

I do feel so, although luckily for me, I don't have a strong need to be understood and accepted by others. I have a few good acquaintances/friends who are either also musfits or 'fit in' pretty well but are themselves open minded enough to accept my antics even if it doesn't always equal actual understanding. This is more if a problem when you're trying to get a job, though, if you don't play according to the rules, you're poor and screwed.


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## stargazing grasshopper (Oct 25, 2013)

emberfly said:


> Such a great response )


As was your response.
Yep I'm kinda in a silly mood today & likely to crack off a few jokes such as that below.


My wife and her friend were having a conversation about how useless men are when my wife said, "They can't do two things at once." 

At this, I interrupted and said, "Actually I can!" 

"Give me an example," she replied.

"Well, while I was fucking you last night, I was thinking about your friend."


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## Heylo (Jan 5, 2015)

I've felt misunderstood & different since I was a little kid. I'm an INFP. I think the introvert types in general have those feelings the most, just a speculation though but since we are living in a extroverted society..


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## dinkalink (Aug 31, 2014)

Isn't this poll kind of biased, considering there are more of certain types than others on PerC? Specifically those who are prone to not really being the norm, I can't find the post right now, but there was one that said PerC is mostly INFJs, INTPs and INFPs, or something like that.


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## AesSidhe (Dec 14, 2014)

dinkalink said:


> Isn't this poll kind of biased, considering there are more of certain types than others on PerC? Specifically those who are prone to not really being the norm, I can't find the post right now, but there was one that said PerC is mostly INFJs, INTPs and INFPs, or something like that.


And ISFPs if you look at the currents poll results


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## ectomorphine (Jan 5, 2015)




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## nichya (Jul 12, 2014)

I never want to fit in.


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## nichya (Jul 12, 2014)

ahaha the poll is killing me, I mean naturally yea INFPs don't fit in but it just reminded me the weirdo poll that again INTPs and INFPs were leading, we belong together INTPs, resistance is futile


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## Gibbo (Mar 7, 2014)

Yeah, but I've always felt like that so it's never bothered me


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## AshtangiBear (Dec 27, 2014)

Always fit in. Just others I sometimes think do not - usually incompetent people.

If something feels awkward, I'll mould it to what I want.


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution (Oct 8, 2013)

INFJ & every day.


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## Gossip Goat (Nov 19, 2013)

Yes. I think the majority of people would say yes.


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## lumostartarus (Apr 1, 2014)

Yes sometimes. I mean I definitely don't fit in socially but I don't mind it most of the time. The only reason is because I'm too quiet for most people I have ever established connection with. The ones that are friendly are loud and can't stand my quietness, the ones that like my quietness because they're just as quiet or quieter than me are hard to get close to. ENxPs have been the only extroverts that are fine with my quietness. I'm funny and friendly though, people like it when I talk, I just don't do it a lot.


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## Im FiNe (Oct 17, 2013)

Ronia said:


> Do you feel like other people see you as batshit crazy?  that's kinda what I mean


I don't feel that I fit in...but other people don't view me like that ^...at least not that I'm aware of. I did vote (INFP) prior to getting to this post in the thread.

I'm also going to guess that in the US many women and girls who prefer T and many men and boys who prefer F will feel like an outsider to some degree.


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## MsBossyPants (Oct 5, 2011)

I have absolutely no desire to conform my behavior to fit in. 

I don't want to run with the pack, I want to lead it.


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## KateMarie999 (Dec 20, 2011)

I always wanted to fit in when I was younger but I also wanted to be true to myself. Being true to myself finally won the internal struggle and from that point on, I've had very few friends and a lot of social anxiety. But I'm a lot more comfortable with myself. So no, I don't fit in. And that's okay.


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## Notus Asphodelus (Jan 20, 2015)

I have no desire to lead or fit in. Throughout my life, I'm more of a neutral party. I give people the impression that I'm a stoner.. always chilling and laid-back. In actual fact , I treat them more like colleagues than friends. When I'm in school, I talk to them, devote myself in some witty banters;etc.. However when I'm out of school, I basically just live my own life. I don't expect too much from people.


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## ninjahitsawall (Feb 1, 2013)

Ronia said:


> Do you feel like other people see you as batshit crazy?  that's kinda what I mean


Not by this definition. I feel alienated from others quite often. Sometimes I am treated as if I'm sane and still feel alienated, so don't think being seen as batshit crazy or not is relevant to how alienated I feel.


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## Kate Bishop (Feb 6, 2015)

It depends on the people in my environment, but I usually do feel alienated. It's like a me vs them mentality. I never really had many friends, most times non at all. I just didn't see the point. When I was younger I always tried to fit in, but I came to the conclusion that I actually don't really care so I just do what I want and celebrate my own uniqueness


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## Bluehealer (Feb 3, 2015)

I rarely feel like I fit in in any situation. I love when I read a post written by another INFP though.:happy:


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## nevermore (Oct 1, 2010)

INTP and I feel like I don't fit in, but not in the normal way where you eventually find your subculture and go "omg, there are all these people out there I totally understand!"

I'm generally personable and even good with people, at least when I first get to know them, and it's totally on a casual level. But even when I get along with people I don't usually feel like I truly connect with them in a deep mental and emotional way. Not because I can't or anything, there are people I've become extremely close with who I feel I have a fair bit in common with, and I've loved these friends and partners all the more for it, but they are so rare that there's no real pattern or way to look for them. It's all luck really.


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