# Relationships among NT's



## Metis (Nov 26, 2009)

I'm curious to know how many of you have managed to find other NT's as friends and what your relationships are like. 

I hadn't had any NT's as close friends until very recently when I started to get to know two girls that live on my hall at my college. I'm now pretty sure that one is an ENTP and the other is an ENTJ. We've only been friends for about a month and I already consider them some of my closest friends. It's strange how rapidly our friendship has progressed. It's like once we had spent some time around each other we very quickly recognized this sense of kinship. Our conversations are always very interesting and we each seem to provide a different perspective. Basically, it's just a load of awesomeness.


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## fn0rd (Mar 21, 2010)

All of my closest friends are NT. We just "click". I am notoriously picky and discriminating in whom I will let into my *inner circle*, but once they're in - they're in.

The relationships vary only slightly, but all of them have the same commonalities: they are all blisteringly intelligent, have twisted senses of humor, don't take shit off of anyone, are full of integrity and are willing to entertain logical opinions that differ from their own. 

Most of the time, words do not even have to be spoken in order for us to understand what is going on in the other person's mind. With *my* NTs, I feel comfortable telling them anything without fear that it would be used against me. I, in return, reciprocate.


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## Ben (Aug 23, 2009)

I chat with five NTs on a regular basis. Three xNTPs (who happen to be my best friends), and two xNTJs that I talk to during class.

With the NTPs (Two introverts and one extrovert), we're all really touchy-feely. (We love hugs.) Our conversations tend to be random, although in some way or another they always have to do with ideas. (Imagining humorous scenarios, for example.) I think it's rare for us to actually hold down a conversation about things that actually _exist_ before getting completely off topic and excited about something, not necessarily abstract, but not concrete, either. It's somewhat rare for us to start talking about feelings (unless we're writing them for a side project or a roleplay, I guess). 

With the ENTJ classmate, it's a bit of a one sided love-hate relationship. She brings out the "flirty" side of me. I tend to annoy her very often with incessant questions about the contents of her make-up kit, so she'll insult me and I'll laugh, often with a retort ready, and then the whole cycle will repeat itself. She's also my boss in the library club, so I make sure I finish my work on time to avoid her. Apparently it's very comical watching us interact, as several teachers have found us amusing.

It's much more different with the INTJ. We eat together at lunch, but we usually don't say anything. If there's someone eating with us, they'll initiate the conversation and we'll follow along, wherever it goes. If we're alone and one of us is reading something, the other will ask and we'll talk about the book and what it's about. Often I sit with him and proofread things he's written -- essays, notes, or applications to summer programs -- because he's decided that I'm "the only one I trust to proofread well". Once I initiated a war about a particular seat that we wanted in a class, and we would compete for it -- whoever got to class the earliest or whoever left the seat unoccupied "won" for the day. Eventually, though, he became the "bigger person" and let me have the seat, and then it all went back how it was before.


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## Metis (Nov 26, 2009)

I feel as though the conversations that we have are the best part of our friendship. I love the S friends that I've had for some time, but I feel as though we have nothing interesting to talk about anymore (nothing that _I_ find interesting, anyways). They aren't much for theoretical or odd conversations. It's totally different with my NT friends. Whenever we sit together for lunch or dinner we're either laughing uproariously in the middle of the cafeteria or having a more serious, intriguing conversation. I love it. I'm never bored with them.


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## AirMarionette (Mar 13, 2010)

i click with my ENTP friend instantly, sometimes we are literally synchronized. he relates to a lot of what i say and conversely i associate with little details of his personality. 

the same happens with my INTJ friend, only she's a lot more like my neurotic self, and much more self-sufficient. other than that, our minds together are a mess of mad science, hypotheses, the pursuit of knowledge, and existentialism. it's a blast! 

i hadn't known either of them until college, before that, i could never really ~connect~ with people because they did not share my view of the world and they did not appreciate things as much as i seemed to. i actually don't know many NTs, besides those two. i think i prefer it that way.


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## LeafStew (Oct 17, 2009)

I dont really find NTs quite easily. My brother is ENTJ so thats a start but we dont really like the same things so we dont really speak to each other all that much.

One of my friend is an INTP, we met through a common friend. We dont really see that common friend anymore but we do things together from time to time.

I had an INTP girl in my team in one of my class, it was fun to do team work with her. 

Conversation with other NTs are definitely the best. I find they are more interesting and meaningful.


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## Thorgar (Apr 3, 2010)

I really click well with ENTJs. They can be quite prickly, but we "get" each other and the conversations are fantastic. INTJs are great too, but with two Is, the energy level can be a bit low. I find ENTPs fascinating, but have a harder time trusting them. I'm not sure I know any INTPs.

Romantically, I don't find NTs to be a good fit, but life would be pretty awful without them around in some capacity.


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## Siggy (May 25, 2009)

A close friend is an INTP, and its great. Its easy for me to talk to her because we are on the same wave length. I dont have to expalin my metaphors and I can talk to her in a condensed manner ( and vice versa).


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## la musa candido (Feb 19, 2010)

intp's and entp's are my best friends.
entj's irritate me. 
intj's differ.


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## fn0rd (Mar 21, 2010)

kristina 23 said:


> entj's irritate me.


This makes me :sad:


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## agokcen (Jan 3, 2010)

I get along very, very well with my fellow NTs.

ENTP dudes tend to be my goofy buddies, although I so rarely meet female ENTPs that I'm not sure how I get along with them in general.
INTP girls are the best, although, in real life, INTP dudes annoy me sometimes for some reason. It's a mutual love-hate relationship with them much of the time. I dunno.
It's no secret that I love INTJs. :blushed: I love debating with them, goofing around with them, just talking to them...cuddling with them...getting married to them...
My best friend is ENTJ. roud: I wuv them all!

When I get into a group of NTs, it's intense. We tend to begin talking theoretically until everyone else becomes immensely confused or bored and leaves. Ahhh, yes!


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## RomanticRealist (Mar 26, 2010)

How do you guys just know that your friends are NT?

I feel like I'm surrounded by Ss.

What are some tricks in determining if someone is an NT?

EDIT: Or heck, an NF even.


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## agokcen (Jan 3, 2010)

RomanticRealist said:


> How do you guys just know that your friends are NT?
> 
> I feel like I'm surrounded by Ss.
> 
> ...


You could ask, for one. I've annoyed many of my friends by pestering them into taking online MBTI assessments.

If you don't want to do this, NTs are still obvious much of the time; I don't know how to describe it, but I can just tell when I'm talking to a fellow NT. NFs, unfortunately, are more difficult to detect.


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## Metis (Nov 26, 2009)

RomanticRealist said:


> How do you guys just know that your friends are NT?
> 
> I feel like I'm surrounded by Ss.
> 
> ...


In my experience it often takes intentional analysis of each individual. After I started becoming close to my two NT friends, I naturally became curious as to what their types were and made a point of figuring it out. I might ask them to take the actual test at some point though.

Other times, it can be immediately obvious what a person's type is, if you're familiar enough with that type. This past weekend my friends and I went to a restaurant and I knew within the first few minutes after meeting our waiter that he was an ENTP. So, sometimes it's obvious, and other times you have to figure it out yourself.


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## Liontiger (Jun 2, 2009)

Unfortunately, I haven't had the chance to be good friends with an NT. However, my counselor is an INTP. We have worked well together right from the get-go, and she is really good at understanding the way I think. She tells me the theory behind the questions she is asking and the approaches she uses, so it's like we're working together every step of the way. She also lets me blabber on about personality typing, which is how I discovered she is INTP :laughing: Oh, and I suspect my professor/advisor is an ENTP. He's my favorite :happy:

So yeah, NT relationships can be quite nice.


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## Apollo Celestio (Mar 10, 2010)

We get together and cry about how dumb the world is.


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## LeafStew (Oct 17, 2009)

RomanticRealist said:


> How do you guys just know that your friends are NT?
> 
> I feel like I'm surrounded by Ss.
> 
> ...


I kind of have a hard time at typing people but I think I can guess right most letter/function of their personality.

I usually start by trying to figure out if people are I/E and J/P by the way they act.

Then I try to see if they are either N/S and T/F by the way they express themselves.

I know it makes no sense starting by introversion/extroversion and judgment/perception because by figuring out which is their first extrovert trait (Ne, Se, Fe, Te) you can figure out the others more easily. But you perceive people before you start talking to them generally, I can't help starting to analyze them in that order. So unless they are already talking I can't really start to find out their extrovert trait.

I haven't found out the magic trick to find NT and NF yet, I guess it all comes down to encounter every type often. Then you have a mental model about everyone of them.


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## Liontiger (Jun 2, 2009)

RomanticRealist said:


> How do you guys just know that your friends are NT?
> 
> I feel like I'm surrounded by Ss.
> 
> ...


Like agokcen said, testing is often a quick and easy method. I know I bugged all my friends to take the test for me. The whole lot are so terribly extraverted (and by that I mean hardly introspective) that I had to read the questions aloud to them, explain what they meant, and record their answers. After that, I just confirmed it based on what I knew about them. No NTs, unfortunately. And one seriously unstable NF :dry:

And if you feel like you're surrounded by Ss, you probably are :laughing: Such is life. Doesn't make them bad people, but it can be difficult to feel like there's a barrier between you and the world.


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## agokcen (Jan 3, 2010)

Lightning said:


> The whole lot are so terribly extraverted (and by that I mean hardly introspective) that I had to read the questions aloud to them, explain what they meant, and record their answers.


Gosh, yes - this always seems to be the problem! I get people to take the tests, but they're never able to understand the questions. I try to be reasonable about it, but as a very introspective person it's difficult to see how one could struggle so much with such questions. I "dumb down" the questions (AKA explain them in normal terms), but even that can barely salvage the results.

In these cases, I'm usually better off typing them myself -- MUCH more accurate results.

Is it just extreme extroversion that causes this, d'you think, or perhaps another aspect of type?


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## Liontiger (Jun 2, 2009)

agokcen said:


> Gosh, yes - this always seems to be the problem! I get people to take the tests, but they're never able to understand the questions. I try to be reasonable about it, but as a very introspective person it's difficult to see how one could struggle so much with such questions. I "dumb down" the questions (AKA explain them in normal terms), but even that can barely salvage the results.
> 
> In these cases, I'm usually better off typing them myself -- MUCH more accurate results.
> 
> Is it just extreme extroversion that causes this, d'you think, or perhaps another aspect of type?


I'm not sure :/ The results of the tests that I "administered" were: ESTP, ESTP, ESFP, ESFP, ENFP, and ESTJ. I had to try really hard to get the ESTPs to cooperate, one ESFP let me do it for her because she thought I was adorable for doing it (she kept getting distracted, though), the other ESFP and ESTJ did it to humour me, and the ENFP kept trying to ask other people which answers she should choose. Really uncooperative bunch.

The common denominator is extraversion and mostly extraverted perception. Perhaps this could be a pattern? (from which ENTPs are exempt, apparently :tongue


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