# Estranged friend..



## CJay3113 (Dec 31, 2008)

There are days like today where I just give up. I honestly don't understand people like I thought I did. I want to so badly, but then all I ever end up doing is getting trashed for attempting to be a good person. I've had my best friend near me for almost 15 years now. And I don't think I know him anymore. I didn't find out until way after the fact about his situation with his family. I know we've never shared extremely personal stuff, but he could have trusted me with this. 

Now I'm kind of worried that he'll end up going down a dark path within the next 10 years. And that's sad because he was always the first to laugh and he kept me grounded when I was falling apart. He doesn't even bother to talk online anymore, it's ridiculous. Right now I'm thinking that our friendship is over because there is no "up" when it comes to him, he'll drag you in the opposite direction. 

And I've never done this blogging thing and I don't know why I bother to. It feels like I'm just bitching just to fill up the time. 

I'm lost.


----------



## Nightriser (Nov 8, 2008)

I've been through the exact same situation, only she was only my friend for three, four years. Nonetheless, she started pulling me down. She refused to believe that there was anything good in life, and though I didn't know her to be suicidal, she was depressingly pessimistic. I tried to help her, I tried to show her that not everything was bad, but she kept getting more cynical, even to the point that she had stopped believing that she could control her life. I had to let go. Perhaps to her, I only proved her right, but when someone becomes convinced that life is misery, there is no way to convince that person otherwise. Only that person can help him/herself then. I'm sorry to say it, but one cannot always help one's friends. I had to suffer a summer (arguably longer season) of guilt to learn that. And it is a difficult lesson to learn. 

However, make absolutely sure that there is nothing more you can do for your friend before giving up.


----------



## CJay3113 (Dec 31, 2008)

I didn't think anyone who care to read this. I was so out of it yesterday. But thanks for the advice. I don't plan to give up on him, but it's becoming an annoying habit that I've dealt with for too long. Being the person that I am, I want to help and at the same time I know my limits. I'm not putting his troubles down, I just don't want to be dragged down too. And if he could see the ways he handles, or in his case doesn't handle, then I'll stick around. He's an INTJ, by the way, and obviously unhealthy.


----------



## Happy (Oct 10, 2008)

You might be surprised at how many people read blogs Cjay. I'm an avid blog reader. haha. I have so many subscriptions.


----------



## Vexilla Regis (May 4, 2011)

I'm a cynic and hate knowing that I am "adversity" to/for my loved ones. Even when others do not believe they are helping, I am here to tell you... they are all helping, just by being here. 

I fight really really really hard to be happy... For me, the little things in life mean the most. I have left more than once friendship, because I knew I was dragging someone down with me... 

I am a proud one. I was the kid who fell off her bike, got up and said, "I'm okay" even when I was not...


----------

