# I know this is kinda silly, but Guide to being popular?



## hengsheng120 (Oct 30, 2010)

As an INTP, I didn't care about being popular because i do not seem to notice what others think of me specifically. However, i always have this desire to show off to people (ENTPish) and i want start doing it for fun and to meet tons of people at once. What would you guys would recommend to person who wants to become popular from nothing in the NT mindset? I realize that it may be hard to change personality, but what general guidelines would you guys give in terms of dress, appearance, and what to say (if i truly desire to be popular due to a personality change from I to E; giving a nerd a makeover, say)? I'm talking about the superficial high school level. :tongue:


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## Ostentatious (Nov 9, 2010)

Sunglasses. 
Sorry, that's all I've got. :frustrating:


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## Verrsili (Jun 13, 2010)

For an INTP? Laid back clothes. Yet try to get a "cool" vibe going. Not a funny, loud, or fun vibe (because that would be harder for an INTP to imitate), but try to strike as close as a core to our real personality. The one part that people like about us (in terms of popularity) is our coolness (and maybe our cuddliness:laughing.
Oh yeah, and definitely rock the sunglasses


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## Black Rabbit (Apr 15, 2010)

Verrsili said:


> For an INTP? Laid back clothes. Yet *try *to get a "cool" vibe going. Not a funny, loud, or fun vibe (because that would be harder for an INTP to imitate), but *try *to strike as close as a core to our real personality. The one part that people like about us (in terms of popularity) is our coolness (and maybe our cuddliness:laughing.
> Oh yeah, and definitely rock the sunglasses


Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.

In all seriousness, I wouldn't worry about it. In a few years you'll be thinking "wow, high school was stupid. Why did I even bother?" Just be yourself, as cliche as that sounds. That's what I did and look at me, I turned out great! lol.


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## Thrifty Walrus (Jul 8, 2010)

While a guide to being popular in how it is traditionally perceived would be impossible, due to the fact that "popularity" has come to have a vague meaning, in the actual sense of the word meaning the most amount of people liking you it is quite simple. People like themselves, it is just in our nature. You just have to show them that you like them too, and then they'll like you back (because you like them). 

Even for someone as analytical and objective such as myself, I find myself liking people who like me. Anyone who strokes my intellectual and shows appreciation will find that I will reciprocate such appreciation to whatever their particular talents are.


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## tooboku (Jun 9, 2010)

Hang out where people have common interests. Go out of your way to talk to people.
Be kind and polite. That's all.

There is no point in becoming popular amongst people you don't like anyway.


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## st0831 (Jul 13, 2010)

I think it is better to be yourself. 

If you like to show off for certain reasons, it may be a internal problem. You have to ask yourself why you want to show off? I think it is a pretty clear answer why you want attention and respect from your peers.

BTW, a NT mindset is much more complicated rather than popularity. I would say it is clearly reasoned out with intentions....:crazy:


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## sonicdrink (Aug 11, 2010)

If you think just from going I to E means popularity, you are mistaken.

Clubs are big in high school, try doing different things and see if you meet some cool people, maybe if you meet just a few good ones you'll abandon your attempt to just be superficially popular. Then, you'll actually be popular and won't even know it. 0.O


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## xezene (Aug 7, 2010)

Be authentic. Be yourself, and don't be ashamed of it. Don't be afraid of being too sensitive or subtle, just relax and be you. People like that.


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## hengsheng120 (Oct 30, 2010)

i'm actually in college right now, i said high school level because i just wanted you guys to give more extreme tips so they are more concrete to follow and easier for me to process into goals related to my life!


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## SubterraneanHomesickAlien (May 16, 2010)

xezene said:


> Be authentic. Be yourself, and don't be ashamed of it. Don't be afraid of being too sensitive or subtle, just relax and be you. People like that.


No, they don't.


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## mnemonicfx (Sep 5, 2010)

Be like Sylar. Show what's inside of yours (though not that extreme).
As long as you're not bad looking, and not too eccentric or crazy, you'll be fine.


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

From my observations at school, here are some rules it seemed like the popular kids were using in high school:

Pretend you are stupid. Intentionally misspell things. Pretend you don't know the meaning of any word over three syllables. Make sure your grammar is terrible, to the point where any average second grader would be tempted to correct you. Mix up your homophones on purpose and use an apostrophe before the s in any plural noun, even if it isn't possessive. Smile whether you are happy or not, and laugh when you see everyone else laughing, even if the thing they are laughing about isn't funny. Find someone who is like you really are underneath it all, and treat that person as badly as possible. Make sure everyone sees you treating that person as an outcast. Make jokes about him so nobody will suspect that you relate to him. Make sure your clothes are trendy, but don't look like you are trying too hard. Intentionally miss answers on tests in order to maintain the image of mediocrity, to seem like you don't care. Make sure you don't do anything that could be perceived as abnormal. Even the slightest variation from what is expected can give you away. Don't ask deep questions or give deep answers. Mimic the others in your social group. If they are grunting and farting, you must grunt and fart with them. If you were a girl, you would have to be thin, pretty, and highly decorated with makeup. Regardless of your gender, you must show an interest in sports. For a guy, it is necessary to be athletic. The most popular guy in school is always the football star. Be rude and insensitive. Be violent to anyone who challenges your social rank. It helps if you can think of yourself as an animal trying to maintain dominance in a pack. 

But even knowing how to achieve popularity, it is hard for me to imagine why anyone would want to.



For college level popularity, being arrogant and pretentious helps. It's almost the opposite of high school popularity, because the goal is to seem deeper and more cultured than everyone else. Use big words in hopes that others won't know what they mean. Talk about philosophy and obscure movies that nobody really cares about. Get into debates, but only if you are certain you will win.

If you are in a fraternity, the high-school rules still apply, about seeming as barbaric and stupid as possible. In college, there are at least two different kinds of popularity, depending on what kind of image you prefer. Having the choice, I would recommend the pseudo-intellectual snob image instead of the the brain-dead, macho, womanizing asshole one.


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## Green Girl (Oct 1, 2010)

I'm an INTJ, so am really not the person to give tips here. However, I do know someone who is extremely popular, and not in a negative, shallow sense. Almost everyone likes her and wants to spend time with her. I was curious, so I started observing and noticed some really powerful traits. I'm not sure they can be learned, but here they are. 

1. She actually likes most people, and she likes herself.
2. She assumes others will like her. She is always correct.
3, She has a cheerful, relaxed attitude.
4. She is adventurous, frequently initiating unusual activities and inviting others to join in. 
5. She is talkative but does not dominate conversations. 
6. She shows interest in whatever the other person is interested in. The amazing part is that she really is interested.
7. She rarely complains or criticizes other people. She also never makes sarcastic comments.
8. She is intelligent and self-disciplined. She doesn't show that off, but she doesn't hide it, either.
9. She is quite beautiful - an athlete with a charming face and great hair. She does not show this off or hide it. She does not use it as a weapon.

By the way, she is 22. And no, I will not give anyone her phone number!


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## xezene (Aug 7, 2010)

SubterraneanHomesickAlien said:


> No, they don't.


Agree to disagree, lol.


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## SubterraneanHomesickAlien (May 16, 2010)

xezene said:


> Agree to disagree, lol.


While I respect your viewpoint and I agree that you should always be yourself, I'm simply arguing with the statement that doing that will make people _like_ you. I use to pretend to be somebody else; I wore a fake smile constantly, pretended to actually care about other people, etc. I had a lot of friends, too, and was generally a well-liked person. Since I've stopped that, I've lost almost all of my friends and most people I know don't like me very much at all. It's impossible to make guarantees about what will "make other people like you" if you don't even know those that you are addressing or what they're like on the inside.


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## Van (Dec 28, 2009)

Be drunk. Drunk INTPs are far more rowdy and hilarious than normal INTPs.


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## Proteus (Mar 5, 2010)

YouTube - Nada Surf Popular


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## JoniF (Jan 7, 2010)

Green Girl said:


> I'm an INTJ, so am really not the person to give tips here. However, I do know someone who is extremely popular, and not in a negative, shallow sense. Almost everyone likes her and wants to spend time with her. I was curious, so I started observing and noticed some really powerful traits. I'm not sure they can be learned, but here they are.
> 
> 1. She actually likes most people, and she likes herself.
> 2. She assumes others will like her. She is always correct.
> ...


This right here is a list of traits of a mature individual. Genuine popularity is the result of respect and compassion. :happy:


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## Diphenhydramine (Apr 9, 2010)

For NTJs I would give typical typological advice: "develop your Se." But for NTPs who knows. The thing is you may be unpopular for any number of reasons. You may be an asshole. You may just smell. If you want us to help you with your popularity you ought to know first why you are unpopular. 

(Because you're an NT, I assume) is it because you are nerdy? don't have that good social skills? don't understand the rules of attraction etc? well, learning is what NTPs do best, go do it. It's not really that difficult. But if you have poor social skills, if you dress like it's the 90s and you are boring to talk to, well there you go, you can change those things if you want to be popular.

People say "be yourself" but I advise against it. "being yourself" is very narrow and you will try and force yourself on people. If you want to be popular, then adopt a popular persona, just don't compromise your core ideals at the same time. You can be a nerdy guy who loves computers ... but talking about it to anyone who'll listen doesn't make you popular because you're "being yourself." 



snail said:


> //


 Wow, bitter much? Surely you don't actually think that popularity is traded against, er, being a decent person? Surely your world view is not so corrupted that you think there's a sliding scale between popularity and decency...

I put it to you that you _don't_ know how to "achieve popularity" and instead think that just acting like the people who are popular will instantly make you popular. It is difficult to believe that if you so easily could become 'popular' you would... I'm sorry, but I very much doubt that that is/was the case.


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