# Performance Anxiety Makes me Virtually Unhirable



## dulcinea (Aug 22, 2011)

I'm crap at second interviews. I had two experiences that were completely different from what I had expected. The second was a test on doing simple tasks in excel. I know excel, but I got confused about what I was supposed to do. Maybe, I'm stupid about following simple instructions, IDK. The point is, I kept messing it up. I can usually do well on interviews, because I look up common questions and prepare my answers, like, 1000 times, but I can't prepare for what they have in store for the second interview, because I never know what to expect, which is why I get nervous and why I'm practically unhirable.

I know one thing I should do is apply for medicaid and see if I can get treated for anxiety disorder. My friend tells me meds is just a band-aid solution. But I'm at a loss for what to do about my anxiety that keeps ruining my life. I know, though, meds can take the edge off, at least. But is there anything else I can do when I can't prepare, because I don't know how I'm going to be tested?


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## AriesLilith (Jan 6, 2013)

In my career as a programmer I also tend to be tested and interviewed in different ways in the later interviews. And in some I've failed miserably too.

I remember how horrible I did in my first interviews. I also had anxiety and probably still do at some point. And some days it gets better, some day it gets worse, even thought I've been improving in teh long term.

The key for my case is to fake it until I make it. Treat it like a game. Fukitol and feel down, embarrassed if I fail, but try hard to live in denial about it, then after emotions pass, learn from it and continue.

Second key is to want to achieve a job so much that it is my main focus. At the end of the day if I fail, who cares besides myself? Many people fails anyways, recruiters are used to it anyways and to them I'm just one in many.

Third key is that no one really care much, and then many others fails too anyways so it's not that bad.
Besides, sometimes if I fail with a recruiter, when that recruiter gets out of the company or not, another recrutier from the same place might contact me too. They often don't keep track about who they interviewed and didn't succeed. They might keep your contacts but another recruiter might assume that at time the position was already filled but contact was kept for future opportunities.

This is indeed not easy and takes time to improve. But no matter how well we are prepared for the typical scenarios, we might face atypical ones and might succeed or fail. Even so, we must keep trying, be in denial of our anxiety, fake confidence until we feel confident and see failure as not a big deal.


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## MisterPerfect (Nov 20, 2015)

dulcinea said:


> I'm crap at second interviews. I had two experiences that were completely different from what I had expected. The second was a test on doing simple tasks in excel. I know excel, but I got confused about what I was supposed to do. Maybe, I'm stupid about following simple instructions, IDK. The point is, I kept messing it up. I can usually do well on interviews, because I look up common questions and prepare my answers, like, 1000 times, but I can't prepare for what they have in store for the second interview, because I never know what to expect, which is why I get nervous and why I'm practically unhirable.
> 
> I know one thing I should do is apply for medicaid and see if I can get treated for anxiety disorder. My friend tells me meds is just a band-aid solution. But I'm at a loss for what to do about my anxiety that keeps ruining my life. I know, though, meds can take the edge off, at least. But is there anything else I can do when I can't prepare, because I don't know how I'm going to be tested?


Im crap at interviews too


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## SolonsWarning (Jan 2, 2017)

I'll buck the trend by saying I've never been interviewed for a job that I wasn't subsequently offered. I'd say it's best to just think of it like a game or solving a puzzle. Don't worry about the implications of success or failure, just have fun with it.

I know that's easier said than done, but honestly I really love taking tests and doing interviews. I've even done interviews for jobs I didn't really want just for fun. If you can think of it as just a fun experience and not a pressure situation I think that will help you a lot.


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## EndsOfTheEarth (Mar 14, 2015)

dulcinea said:


> I know one thing I should do is apply for medicaid and see if I can get treated for anxiety disorder. My friend tells me meds is just a band-aid solution. But I'm at a loss for what to do about my anxiety that keeps ruining my life. I know, though, meds can take the edge off, at least. But is there anything else I can do when I can't prepare, because I don't know how I'm going to be tested?


Yes there is. Apply for jobs you don't give a fig about in companies you have no interest in working with. Go to those interviews totally unprepared and wing it. It will do a lot for your self confidence to be in situations where you have to ad-lib and where the outcome just doesn't matter. You're already expecting a no, so any progress you make will be worthwhile. No-one will remember you since you are just another candidate they're not interested in. Get comfortable with what's uncomfortable.


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## Catwalk (Aug 12, 2015)

I remember my (1st/2nd) ever interview(s) ever were done in group interview(s) with 6-8 other women for Victoria's Secret (*ROFLOL*), all of us trying to talk over ea. other.

Let's say, I left VS forever--_terribly disorganized _company, indeed. Could not stand them for long.

___________

All seem(s) normal here, doll. The more (exposure) the more the anxiety; _shall decrease_ in differential area(s). 

As an anxiety patient myself, interview(s) are the only times in which I can be irrationally arrogant (&) not disgust others (!) Superb. It is always a_ surprise_ what (X)-specimen throws at me. I tend to prepare a few week(s) ahead of time (via) anxietic "decompression" before anything important.

Ex; 

(A) -- (1) Sufficient back-up planning. (e.g., multiple outlets for failed attempts).

(B) -- (2) Sufficient (Ni) exercises. (e.g., depleting brain-fog).

(C) -- (3) Deflating ego beforehand until task. (e.g., eliminating "false hopes" / wishful-thinking to induce relaxation).

(D) -- (4) Increasing "self-confidence / esteem" (e.g., never applying going anywhere without acquiring *pre-knowledge* of any probable requests, sufficiently studying of possible material that may be on work "tests").


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## Toru Okada (May 10, 2011)

Take phenibut. It will destroy your anxiety and give you motivation and energy. And it's inexpensive. Get it before the gubmint makes it illegal, like all good things.

All you nervous nellies out there can thank me later.


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## strawberryLola (Sep 19, 2010)

I know this may sound silly, but you can try adding probiotics (pills or kambucha) to your diet.

A lot of our anxieties and mental states can be attributed to the health of our gut. Antibiotics and pesticides have a way of destroying our normal flora, which can create imbalance/anxiety.

That, and GABA, L-theanine, or adaptogens like Sun Eleuthero, Gaia Herb's Adrenal formula.

Stress levels tax the adrenals too, raising cortisol. A few breathing exercises before the interview with mental visualizations of a peaceful relaxing environment with ocean waves crashing while you imagine and breath in clean air, and exhaling out dark air (resembling your anxieties) can help. Surely. And some good Zzzz's.


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## dulcinea (Aug 22, 2011)

EndsOfTheEarth said:


> Yes there is. Apply for jobs you don't give a fig about in companies you have no interest in working with. Go to those interviews totally unprepared and wing it. It will do a lot for your self confidence to be in situations where you have to ad-lib and where the outcome just doesn't matter. You're already expecting a no, so any progress you make will be worthwhile. No-one will remember you since you are just another candidate they're not interested in. Get comfortable with what's uncomfortable.


Good idea


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