# How would you describe sex?



## SpiritEssence (Sep 23, 2020)

"You know, when a man loves a woman..."



__ https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=317265165536657


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

Stress relief.


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## APBReloaded (Mar 8, 2019)

The deepest level of bond between two people, too often taken for granted.


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## eeo (Aug 25, 2020)

Nobody here thinks that sex is kind of overrated?


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## Drecon (Jun 20, 2016)

It's two different things, that can overlap in ways. 

1: It's our basic means of procreation. It's what we do to make new humans and it's a normal part of our lives and survival as a species

2: It's a set of activities that people engage in to pleasure themselves, each other and sometimes deepen their relationship. Its uses are extremely varied ranging from impersonal entertainment to the deepest expression of love that two people can manage. It's very personal in that way in that it means something different to everyone. 

It's also worth noting that it's not always pleasurable for everyone who does it, even when people do it of their own volition. For some people it's just something that needs to be done in order to keep the peace, for some it's a spectrum where sometimes it's bad and other times it's good. 

Giving an overarching definition of sex really can't do it justice in any way. It's something that is so omnipresent and varied that trying to define it will always exclude valid forms of sex.


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## Tytoalba (Sep 21, 2020)

Fun


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## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)

Its hard to describe because it’s never just one thing. Sometimes its fun, sometimes its stress relief, sometimes its emotional, sometimes its loving, sometimes its break the bed passionate, sometimes I feel I can’t get him close enough...
It varies depending on my mood and his.


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## Phil (Dec 27, 2010)

Sometimes you do a in, but other times you do a out


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## islandlight (Aug 13, 2013)

@Phil 
The hokey pokey!


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## Phil (Dec 27, 2010)

islandlight said:


> @Phil
> The hokey pokey!


Woah no need to be so graphic about it


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

I keep accidentally confusing this thread for the "come up with a good name for a bad porno" thread (I think b/c they are both right next to each other and created by the same person) and I'm like--yeah...these would be pretty absurd names for a porno.



APBReloaded said:


> The deepest level of bond between two people, too often taken for granted.


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

Maybe we could get somewhere if we used magnetic poetry? 





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## Kynx (Feb 6, 2012)

It's a biological drive to hit genitals together until you get a dopamine surge, in order to reproduce. 
There's only so many ways you can do it before it's meh


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## Infinitus (Jul 12, 2019)

Exchange.


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## Penny (Mar 24, 2016)

YearseRayneDon said:


> Would you describe sex as fun?
> If not, then what would you describe it as?
> Is what you’re describing, your ideal/fantasized sex?


sure, but if I had to use one word to describe it I would choose "closeness". yes.


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## ThisNameWorks (Mar 11, 2017)

Kynx said:


> It's a biological drive to hit genitals together until you get a dopamine surge, in order to reproduce.
> There's only so many ways you can do it before it's meh


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## Kynx (Feb 6, 2012)

YearseRayneDon said:


>


Lol. Unpopular opinion, sure, but nowadays I can't help but wonder why people don't have better things to do or to think about. Maybe I'll change my mind one day, after going without it for a while or something, idk.

There's so much for the mind to explore, but it's always dragged back to the same old primal drive, basically on par with chimpanzees, etc. "Let's pound genitals together". 
Not exactly an intellectually stimulating activity. 🙄


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)




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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)




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## Sentimentality (Oct 9, 2020)

Passion expressed in the most physical manner.


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## Astrida88 (Jun 6, 2019)

"It’s something you do that feels good, and then it's done." doesn't sound that off from what I am thinking.
Sex? Penis in vagina and mindless pushing? Meh. Masturbation is better. 

For me sex is only fun when it comes with lots of foreplay, kisses and cuddles. Kinks welcome (at least some of them, I don't play with feet or pee). The act itself is just boring. As soon as the actual sex starts I am wishing it to end because it's not that enjoyable even if I manage to come. My mind just wanders (what if I get pregnant, what if it causes a yeast or bacterial infection) and it's not comfortable physically (my body isn't that flexible - most positions are uncomfortable - and I am tight). For me the foreplay could last forever and I like to cuddle afterwards. But sex? I could live without that.


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## ENIGMA2019 (Jun 1, 2015)

Depends. Fun is not very descriptive imo. Mindblowing with the right person. Sucks with the wrong one.


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## ThisNameWorks (Mar 11, 2017)

ENIGMA2019 said:


> Depends. Fun is not very descriptive imo. Mindblowing with the right person. Sucks with the wrong one.


I guess when I say fun I mean, exciting like the build up to it. I suppose the silliness of the little things. Especially when she’s playful, like foreplay if that’s right word.
Foreplay: sexual activity that precedes intercourse.

Wrestling for dominance. Getting a foot to the face. Rolling together. Loving their body. Body chills/tingles. Tying up, or getting tied up. Denial or being denied. Teasing. Biting/nibbling the sensitives.

I haven’t done the dress-up/acting thing but that looks fun. I mean like something I want to do, that I would enjoy.

I haven’t exactly had intimacy. Unfortunately.


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## Spacecabinet (Oct 7, 2020)

Boring.


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## Gabbie (Sep 23, 2020)

"I'll be a park, and thou shalt be my deer; Feed where thou wilt, on mountain or in dale: Graze on my lips, and if those hills be dry, Stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie." - William Shakespeare, Venus and Adonis


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## Phil (Dec 27, 2010)

tanstaafl28 said:


> View attachment 869241


I don't know about poems but I play guitar and am adept at playing solos.


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

Phil said:


> I don't know about poems but I play guitar and am adept at playing solos.


I never had the patience for instruments. I'm generally clever with words.


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## Phil (Dec 27, 2010)

tanstaafl28 said:


> I never had the patience for instruments. I'm generally clever with words.


In my experience taking the time to learn the _fingerings_ can prove to be quite useful ☺


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

Phil said:


> In my experience taking the time to learn the _fingerings_ can prove to be quite useful ☺


You should see my typing speed.


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## ThisNameWorks (Mar 11, 2017)

Cute


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## ENIGMA2019 (Jun 1, 2015)

YearseRayneDon said:


> I guess when I say fun I mean, exciting like the build up to it. I suppose the silliness of the little things. Especially when she’s playful, like foreplay if that’s right word.
> Foreplay: sexual activity that precedes intercourse.
> 
> Wrestling for dominance. Getting a foot to the face. Rolling together. Loving their body. Body chills/tingles. Tying up, or getting tied up. Denial or being denied. Teasing. Biting/nippling the sensitives.
> ...


Nice description and that was the word that popped in my head reading the first two paragraphs. Intimacy. I am sure you will find it : )


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## ENIGMA2019 (Jun 1, 2015)

tanstaafl28 said:


> You should see my typing speed.


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

Don’t even know anymore this is the longest in my adult life I have gone without


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

Same--it's been since 2011.

I don't think I know anymore. I am not that much of a fan, because I haven't had it in so long, I guess.

I think it's just that I don't like people that much anymore? I am tired of dealing with imperfection, and I am imperfect myself. I would rather not have anything to do with the messiness of intimacy. I just am too simple of a person to deal with that all.

Not reflecting on anyone else, but for myself. 

If it is just an impulse for reproduction, I am not interested in it.


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

I remember writing about it before though--to me it is full of imagination and sensations and thoughts.

I find sex dredges up some of the weirder things from the depths of my unconscious. Like after a winter storm throws so many strange creatures from the depths of the ocean onto the beach, or washes down all the secrets from the rivers in the hills, to lay bare on the shore.

It's not entirely physical for me--I am not sure if I disassociate, but my counselor said something about it. I experience it as a cacophony of sensual stimuli creating a mental landscape that I cannot really understand.

But the mental and the physical don't usually match, and so if I were to choose one, I would choose my own mental landscape with no physical stimuli. I feel much safer exploring that than intimacy with another person.

I have hope that it's possible that the two could be in harmony, but if not it's something I will always wonder about, but I can be happy with. I guess that's the ultimate lack of desire for closure. 

Sex could be so many things though--I know because I imagine them!


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## 556155 (Apr 29, 2020)

I'm torn between having a very down-to-earth view of it (one of the things that's coming to my mind is how it's a natural antidepressant ^^) and to just go with @YearseRayneDon's picture, because with a soul brother/sister, it can really be all of that, the complete fluidity of movements and desire, getting silly, the playing-and-pretending, playing with power, playing with gender stereotypes. And yes, let's not restrict sex to penetration, that's a whole thing which can include cuddling and entering a state of mind where you can crack jokes and show the full extent of how much you like the other person. But you have to have the right partner in crime ^^ I already had a one-night stand with a guy who took the whole thing of having sex very ceremoniously and seriously and it was ... let's just say an embarrassing night.

The general thing that's coming to my mind is that it's the kind of intimacy you easily feel you can live without but when you have it back you realize that it really remove much of the weight of your existence easily for a few hours or days. It creates such a magical transformation in me I have a friend who's able to spot whether I've had sex 2 nights before just by spotting the lightness in my gait. But that's maybe just me, I have an asexual friend who has a very fulfilling life, she's just not in need of such things is all.

This made me think I took a peep to the subreddit about sex lately and the freedom of speech between genders in that subreddit was really cool.


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## 556155 (Apr 29, 2020)

@YearseRayneDon

But coming back to your first post, I don't find it easy to enter the state when sex becomes fun or even just agreeable (because the word "fun" is probably a perceiver word, lol). That's maybe me being a woman but before that, there's a journey to do to accept your own desires and realize you have the right to voice them and to take the initiative. I don't especially identify as dominant in bed but regardless of kinks I think it can be a good thing for a woman to try at least once the experience to be in full control in order to realize the universe isn't going to collapse just because she has asserted her needs. Clearly before I completed this journey (and it was rather late in my life, like at 25 y.o), I was stuck in the stage where sex was mostly awkward with some interesting physical sensations interspersed in between. 

Just repeating myself, here but alchemy is all. What doesn't work for me is sex with someone who refuses to talk about things, maybe because they feel it kills the glamour or sacred nature of the situation, I don't know. I don't even mean using crude words, just being straightforward on how it went, the act of sex, how each partner is experiencing it and would like to make it better.


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## Dalien (Jul 21, 2010)

Intense sensuous (do not confuse with sensual) intimacy. I don’t believe it can get any more fun than that.
My Ni and Se playing together allowing thus naturally. It‘s really when I leave Ti and Fe out of it. 
I could write more, but I don’t really have the words other than the first sentence that I typed here to explain it. For me it’s that damn powerful and needs not more explanation.


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## ThisNameWorks (Mar 11, 2017)

@Dalien 
But what exactly do you mean? Google pretty much defined sensual and sensuous the same.
Wouldn’t sensual intimacy and sensuous intimacy be the same thing?


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## impulsenine (Oct 18, 2020)

Sex, like any activity, can be described as something overrated, common, simple or as something really divine and anything between that.

I would describe it that way: Sex is a pleasant activity and also a physiological need. Like eating, the form of how it happens and how you perceive it varies from zero to infinite. 
With a compatible partner it can be one of the most beautiful activity to do together. Why I see it that way? Well, sex is an act of profound intimacy. I am sure that if I want to have sex with someone I don't just want to have a foreplay and the act itself. I want to let mine and her imagination, creativity, emotions, thoughts implode. It's not about the pleasure itself but about the pleasure of how things from deep down of your Shadow Conciousness get up at the surface. 

Having sex with brain and with body at the same time is completely satysfing. The fact that you can think, care and develop emotions based on how someone treats you (words spoken, physical gestures, touching) during that activity is wonderful.
For me, sex is about destroying barriers. It's one type of activity where WE must unleash the deepest secrets, strongest emotions and desires, where we are obliged to act beyond our personal values, principles and rationality. 

For me, sex is an activity that learns me it is okay to lose myself and just let it be. That I shouldn't care if I am doing something wrong, I just do what it comes from my imagination. 

And also it makes me feeling desirable. 

That's just with the right partner. Otherwise it can be a regular blank activity that only gives physical and possibly mental pleasure, maybe a little bit the feel of emotional bonding and that's it, nothing special.


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## OldFart (Oct 13, 2019)

Complicated.

If I give you paints, a brush and a blank canvas, what do you have a picture of? 

Sex conveys meaning, but does not have any inherent meaning within itself. You have to add that part from within yourself. 

That's what makes it so important. It provides a mechanism for the expression of what's hidden inside.


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## Rift (Mar 12, 2012)

show and tell: a bit of ritual, musical flow, interpretive movement, performance art, gymnastics, dramatic improv, competitive sport, costumes and props.


* *


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## ENIGMA2019 (Jun 1, 2015)

What is this word you speak of? Sex? I may have to look it up.


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## UniversalIndividual (Nov 16, 2020)

A veiny, thick, long, and hard sausage with meatballs inside of fleshy meat with tight walls that squirts out creamy white substance into the egg. Now, I'm hungry for eggs, cream, meatballs, and Italian sausage. 😂


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