# Is this the biggest difference between INFJs and INFPs?



## Anni415 (Jul 26, 2016)

an image just popped into my head of an INFJ running frantically around yelling 'take these weapons! defend the keep' Kind of like what happens in lord of rings 2. And an infp trying to help people by throwing them them flowers and scented candles and saying 'relax everything will be ok.' This is somewhat of an exaggeration perhaps and infps are one of my favourite types. I think that in a situation that was actually dire they would be very helpful. for moral support and otherwise. Moral support isn't something that should be underestimated either I think in its value.


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## lavendersnow (Jan 13, 2016)

Wait, what difference are you suggesting? INFPs do the flower throwing and INFJs don't?


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## INFJenNiFer (Feb 20, 2016)

Hahaha... No...

INFJs can also be 'relax everything will be alright' (tbh that is me to my easily panicked mom). INFPs can also run frantically, shown from my INFP friend who panicked so much, afraid if a person didn't like her gift, surprise, etc. 

Conclusion: That is not the biggest difference. The biggest difference is that INFJs and INFPs share no functions together.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Goetterdaemmerung (Dec 25, 2015)

Nah, I'd be the auxiliary supplier of weapons.

It also depends on the context of what we are doing. If we are fighting some kind of revolution, one that aligned with my core values, I'd happily pick up a weapon to fight.

Don't underestimate......


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## kirsten.j (Jul 12, 2016)

I relate to that description of INFJ, probably due to inferior Se, but I also would probably be killed minutes later, again, because of *inferior* Se. If Aragon really is INFJ at least he improved his inferior function considerably...


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## Sour Roses (Dec 30, 2015)

No way.

In a crunch, INFJ and INFP tend to act similarly... we are called lookalike types for a reason.
We're just thinking through things differently... so at each war meeting we would say "Huh?" to each other and then giggle a lot.

I got to sit on my butt and observe my INFP neighbor (tested) at her Krav Maga class.
I was humored to see she acted a lot like I would...
That is, giggling at her every mistake and causing others to laugh too even when they were trying to be all serious. Then constantly buckling down again and trying to do it better.

In stressful or challenging situations, they tend to use more inferior Te, and we use more inferior Se. 
Similar results + catastrophes insue...
Just part of what makes us lookalikes.


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## kirsten.j (Jul 12, 2016)

I found myself pondering this today....

The difference between Ni and Ne seems like this:
Ne: the ideas come quickly-- you get a bunch of ideas when you think about stuff. You would probably find yourself mulling over which ideas were better than others.

Ni: the ideas come slowly. You "strip down" concepts to find the _essential_ idea, so you end up with one central idea if your head, and then you mull over that single idea almost obsessively. You don't like considering other options, because other options would be a distraction from the main idea. 

Fi/ Fe:

Fi: even when you're with others, you still have this island of personal feeling inside of you. You have emotional reactions that are distinctly different from those of people around you, on a regular basis.

Fe: your emotions seem tied to what is going on around you. You get caught up in emotional energy that already exists around you. If you're having a feeling that's very different from what's around you, you might not be aware of it.
Alternatively, you could be caught up in a reaction _against_ what's going on around you (this is probably a signature of INFJs among the other Fe-users). This state could mimic Fi. But it's different, because Fi is truly independent Feeling, where as Fe-in-rebellion is still directly tied to what's around you.


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## Purple Skies (Aug 31, 2015)

It's weird but I feel like they both portray the opposite of what they are on the inside. INFJs seem warmer to me, easy to talk to but I get the sense that underneath it all, they don't give a shit. Whereas INFPs look like they don't give a shit, and probably don't if they don't know you, but with those they like, they care quite a bit -like that character Amelie, she did nice things for people but was never really that nice or warm upfront.


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## Nephilibata (Jan 21, 2015)

Purple Skies said:


> It's weird but I feel like they both portray the opposite of what they are on the inside. INFJs seem warmer to me, easy to talk to but I get the sense that underneath it all, they don't give a shit. Whereas INFPs look like they don't give a shit, and probably don't if they don't know you, but with those they like, they care quite a bit -like that character Amelie, she did nice things for people but was never really that nice or warm upfront.


I don't disagree (mainly because A.) I know neither type irl and B.) I wouldn't say that's all untrue), but I don't believe INFJs don't give a crap underneath. You say INFPs don't care * if they don't know you*. Seems like it's the same for both types, everyone in fact, but high Fe just puts more value on being 'warm/kind' regardless while (high) Fi might not see the point of being kind if they don't want to be/they don't genuinely care about you.


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## Purple Skies (Aug 31, 2015)

Nephilibata said:


> I don't disagree (mainly because A.) I know neither type irl and B.) I wouldn't say that's all untrue), but I don't believe INFJs don't give a crap underneath. You say INFPs don't care * if they don't know you*. Seems like it's the same for both types, everyone in fact, but high Fe just puts more value on being 'warm/kind' regardless while (high) Fi might not see the point of being kind if they don't want to be/they don't genuinely care about you.


Well yeah, technically speaking no one cares about people they don't know but Fe, strong Fe particularly has a way of making you think they care as much as they portray on the outside but they don't. Not to say they're heartless but what they display on the outside doesn't match what's on the inside -with their friends and family it's a different thing but with co workers and what not, they're not emotionally honest. There seems to be this misconception of INFPs caring about every thing that breaths so I felt like I had to emphasize that they probably don't care, like everyone else.


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## Nephilibata (Jan 21, 2015)

Purple Skies said:


> Well yeah, technically speaking no one cares about people they don't know but Fe, strong Fe particularly has a way of making you think they care as much as they portray on the outside but they don't. Not to say they're heartless but what they display on the outside doesn't match what's on the inside -with their friends and family it's a different thing but with co workers and what not, they're not emotionally honest. There seems to be this misconception of INFPs caring about every thing that breaths so I felt like I had to emphasize that they probably don't care, like everyone else.


I don't know that I'd use 'emotionally dishonest', more like being polite. No reason to be cold or abrasive if you don't have to be. But then, I'm not a consistently warm person and probably don't act as Fe is stereotypically portrayed. As such, and because I'm just one type of INFJ, I can't speak for anyone but me.

Let's put it this way, I'm one of the least judgmental people I know (quoting someone I know, not my words). I'm nice and polite, not the overly warm/bubbly kind of friendly. It's pretty difficult to get on my bad side and even harder for me to act mean. Similarly it's just as difficult to actually get me to like someone. My politeness is distant; I'm pretty sure the only instances I seem warm is to people I'm close to or when someone needs help. Even then I might still be distant rather than openly caring/appear so. My upbringing and enneagram probably have to do with it. My close family are all Fi-users and not very warm either and my E-type is 9 with a pretty strong 1 wing.

I'm not emotionally dishonest, I'm distant more than anything. The only 'dishonesty' that I may display is sugarcoating what I say out of consideration for someone's feelings. Of course I don't know who needs it, but it's 'just in case', especially with people like colleagues. To add, if I see someone in distress and I'm not close to them, I do feel genuinely concerned for them * in the moment*. Whether I go right up to them to ask if they need help or am more covert such as being extra polite/nice or do something for them, depends on my mood. And if I dislike someone because they're mean to me/someone I care about, I'm mean right back. If I dislike because they're annoying for some other reason, I just avoid them as much as possible. I'm not going to go out of my way to be nice.

I'm sorry if I'm nitpicking. But similarly to how you say not all INFPs care about everything that breathes, not all INFJs are warm to everyone regardless of how close they are.


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## Hero of Freedom (Nov 23, 2014)

Purple Skies said:


> It's weird but I feel like they both portray the opposite of what they are on the inside. INFJs seem warmer to me, easy to talk to but I get the sense that underneath it all, they don't give a shit. Whereas INFPs look like they don't give a shit, and probably don't if they don't know you, but with those they like, they care quite a bit -like that character Amelie, she did nice things for people but was never really that nice or warm upfront.


I know an INFJ and he acts very rigid now ever since he started running projects, howcome he finds some of the humour that me and others would 'laugh' at as "pointless/dumb" or "immature" for example? He still retains that emotional understanding quality however.

But now I might get in trouble soon for allowing my Fi to pull me into a flame war for another community based on fiction different from here because he owns a group I'm part of. Got no choice simply, it was too offensive. Had. To. Fight. Back, couldn't let the injustice win. Which they claim they told me "countless times" even if I haven't done it in awhile. I hope I'm not roasted, some omg "idiots" kept bumping the thread(s) it happened in long after it was over. How to not get caught by an INFJ?


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## Vivid Melody (Apr 25, 2011)

As someone else already pointed out, the context would come into play. What are we fighting for? As well as enneagram. A lot of things would come into play. 

You'd be surprised. There was a Zombie Apocalypse in the INFJ forum some what recently and most INFJ's basically said that they would offer moral support or not last very long in a fight/wouldn't want to fight. More behind the scenes stuff.


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## GentleLions (Aug 20, 2016)

Being judgmental - Yes, INFJs can be judgemental. As for me, both my parents are Js. The more mature I get the less judgemental I am. I think the motive behind an action is more important than the action. Some actions are suppose to be nice and kind no matter what, but the motive can be totally for the benefit of the person doing it and I don't think that is nice especially when it is done as part of a mental game to appear nice and make another appear in a negative light.

Fe / Fi don't care as much as they appear. If Fe didn't care really care as much as they seem to then this world would be in a worse state. People who work to make life better for others like Mother Theresa did is an example that contradicts @Purple Skies. I don't know that anyone can really care for everyone or everything that breathes. To do so would likely be totally exhausting and burn a person out. I am predominantly Fe, but have high Fi as well. Yes, I have internal conflicts between the two. I've had to learn I can't help everyone or every cause I come across because I will not be able to accomplish much if I tried. I've also learned its ok to care for myself as doing so enables me to continue to help others.

I hate conflict, work for peace or walk away if at all possible. However, a true threat to those I care about and myself and I will 1. let the actions of my enemy destroy himself or 2. if absolutely necessary I will put aside emotion enough to do what it takes to destroy the enemy. My self preservation comes into play except I would sacrifice myself for those really close to me, especially the younger generation.


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## Scarlet.Black (Jan 6, 2016)

Purple Skies said:


> Well yeah, technically speaking no one cares about people they don't know but Fe, strong Fe particularly has a way of making you think they care as much as they portray on the outside but they don't. Not to say they're heartless but what they display on the outside doesn't match what's on the inside -with their friends and family it's a different thing but with co workers and what not, they're not emotionally honest. There seems to be this misconception of INFPs caring about every thing that breaths so I felt like I had to emphasize that they probably don't care, like everyone else.


How would you know that?


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## Purple Skies (Aug 31, 2015)

Scarlet.Black said:


> How would you know that?


I've spent enough time around strong Fe users to know. For example, if they've known me for only a week and I casually mention that a relative of mine was sick, they'd act similar to what an actual friend would act. Not saying that's a bad thing, I'm guessing that's their immediate reaction, but what I meant by that is the feelings displayed on the outside more than likely appear stronger than what they actually feel.


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## Scarlet.Black (Jan 6, 2016)

Purple Skies said:


> I've spent enough time around strong Fe users to know. For example, if they've known me for only a week and I casually mention that a relative of mine was sick, they'd act similar to what an actual friend would act. Not saying that's a bad thing, I'm guessing that's their immediate reaction, but what I meant by that is the feelings displayed on the outside more than likely appear stronger than what they actually feel.


 What kind of research method have you used to understand how someone feels inside? How can you know or prove that?


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## Purple Skies (Aug 31, 2015)

Scarlet.Black said:


> What kind of research method have you used to understand how someone feels inside? How can you know or prove that?


Because that kind of thing requires research... 

''How would you know that?'' & ''How can you know or prove that?'' - To me these questions are the same. Perhaps read my previous post where I answered (maybe not the way you would've liked me to, in that case, oh well)


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## Scarlet.Black (Jan 6, 2016)

Purple Skies said:


> Because that kind of thing requires research...
> 
> ''How would you know that?'' & ''How can you know or prove that?'' - To me these questions are the same. Perhaps read my previous post where I answered (maybe not the way you would've liked me to, in that case, oh well)


I wonder how you can be sure about how other people feel because they can only know these things themselves. So basically what you can do is make sumptions about their feelings. So it seems to me like your opinion is based on pure sumptions. 

Or do you honestly believe that you are capable of really *knowing* how others feel?


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## Purple Skies (Aug 31, 2015)

Scarlet.Black said:


> I wonder how you can be sure about how other people feel because they can only know these things themselves. So basically what you can do is make sumptions about their feelings. So it seems to me like your opinion is based on pure sumptions.
> 
> Or do you honestly believe that you are capable of really *knowing* how others feel?


I think you're focusing too much on people and not enough on the function. This whole thread is about how INFJs differ from INFPs. I pointed out their difference in terms of their feeling function. Strong Fe users 100% appear to react to things stronger than they really do, that's one of the numerous things that separate them from strong Fi users. I've known INFPs who thought they appeared friendly when they actually looked cold and INFJs who were smiling without them even knowing. No one said anything about reading other people's feelings, it's how they come across and you can tell if you just *observe* them. Telling an INFJ I failed my test most likely will get me an 'awwww no, don't worry, these things happen and...'' etc along with all the facial expressions to go with it. Now am I saying they don't care *at all* -no. But they certainly won't be thinking about sad the whole thing is once they've left your company. That does not mean they're fake but rather it's simply how they express, even the most minute of feelings, -outwardly, so most things they express come out looking like they deeply care. Like I said it may be different with real friends & family, but I'm talking about generally -with acquaintances and such. 

Can't explain it further than that.


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