# It's a blessing and a curse



## Nightwine (Nov 11, 2008)

_As far as I can determine, the boyfriend is an ISTP. One of those types notorious for living in the here and now, let's take this one day at a time.

I'm moving away in April-ish, and our relationship will come to a close. I love him greatly, have learned a lot from him, but we've incompatibilities that can't be gotten over, I think, without one of us letting go part of ourselves. I wouldn't want that asked of me, and I'm certainly not asking it of someone I love.

Mostly it's that there are definite things I want in my future, and getting married is one of them. And I know that to have a hope of the marriage working out is for both parties to have a similar idea of what one is. His concept of marriage is vastly different than mine to start with, partially out of a 'commitment is bad, constraining evil thing'. 

To further it, he is polyamorous. I've tried it out for a bit, and it really isn't for me. I get along well enough with his other girlfriend, but I don't think I can spend my life trying to keep my heart and emotions open enough to handle my significant other having other significant others.

So while I know it is best for it to come to a close, I am in a way dreading April. It hangs overhead like a storm cloud, and while sometimes I can mention the end in an almost blase fashion, other times I feel my heart breaking crack by crack.

Today in a conversation with him, I realized, thank god he is a day to day, let's make no commitments kind of guy. Because while I'm sitting here going "Oh god, April," he's saying "It's not April yet, today is today."

Bittersweet._


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

I imagine that it would be hard for most INFPs to deal with a relationship in which the cherished individual had other girlfriends, and the move allows you an easy way out of something that isn't going to be able to be molded into the ideal. Good luck dealing with the situation as painlessly as possible. I hope you find what you are looking for eventually, since most of us don't.


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## Aurora Fire (Oct 13, 2008)

*hugs* I hope you feel OK when the time comes


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