# "When You **** Me, Let's Pretend I'm Dead"



## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

OK. I had a very disturbing night tonight and I ought to go to bed right now to forget this ever happened, but I need to know if this is even close to normal.

So my boyfriend of 5-6 months is an ENTJ, and for the whole time we've been together, he kept doting on how "adventurous" and "open-minded" I am. I figured that I was just rubbing his N the right way.

Well, the sex totally rocks, we do a lot of roleplay and other kinky stuff, but...

Recently, he's been needing a lot of reassurance that I don't find him "weird" or "crossing the line". Just acting insecure, when he shouldn't be. I'm as eccentric as they come.

So tonight, for seemingly no reason, he took me to a $300/person restaurant and gave me a ridiculously expensive pendant from Tiffany. I was suspicious to be honest, but MAN I had noo clue. Rofl

We went to his place to get it on like the rabid sex freaks we were, but he wanted to go to his backyard. I'm buzzed and thinking, "woo! Voyeurism potential!" 

There was a huge hole dug up with a shovel next to it.

Him: "One reason I love you God is that you're fun and unafraid."
Me: *wondering why the fuck there's a huge man-sized dug up hole in his backyard*
Him: "I can tell you anything, right? You won't get scared off, right?"
Me: "uh...right. What's up?"
Him: "...I...oh man, I can't believe I'm going to admit this. I've wanted to, but I just couldn't."
Me: *shivering, it's cold* Well lets go inside. It's kinda chilly out tonight.
Him: "No, see, that's the thing. My ultimate fantasy."
Me: "Seeing me shiver?"
Him: "No. Listen, I have this fantasy of you fucking me out of the grave. I'll pretend to be dead."
Me: ................................come again?
Him: "Sorry sorry! Only if you want to. If you do, I can either have my eyes wide open or closed. What do you think?"
Me: ...
Me: omgfucknoLOLgtgtimeformetoGTFOok?BYE!

Anyway, he called like 5 times so far, leaving messages about how drunk he was, how he went way too far, what a moron he is, how he was just joking, how he read about the idea on AskMen, etc.

Is this kind of necrophilia fantasy normal?? I mean, instead of strip clubs, is this guy going to the graveyard to give a bunch of fucking tombstones lapdances? Am I going to have to worry about this guy cheating on me with a mummy?

What the fuck is this shit. I haven't called him to break up with him yet, but this stunt of his undid all the appeal he had. It's a little early for April Fools!


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## StandingTiger (Dec 25, 2010)

If you're not comfortable doing it, don't do it.

It's just sex though; it's supposed to be fun.

What is the worst that can happen? It's awkward, everyone laughs, and you don't try that same thing again.

But again, don't ever do anything that really bothers you. You're the only one who decides where that line is drawn. There's no "normal" when it comes to sexual fantasies.


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

And I swear on my life (lol sorry) that this happened. This post sounds like trolling on steroids, but it's unfortunately all very real.

ugh..


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## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

Well from the description, I kinda hardly doubt the "just joking" and "too drunk" parts. Was he drunk when he dug the hole as well, I'm sure it would take awhile to actually dig a human-size hole? Also why dig the hole if he wasn't going to have sex in it? (I say this merely because if he's that "freaky" I would think being in the hole would fit the "idea" better) 

It sounds like it was one of his fantasies and if you aren't into it, like hmwith said, never do anything uncomfortable. I would venture to guess the percentage of people who would be drawn to this type of activity as a sexual stimulate is very low. I do slightly feel bad for him since he said it was his ultimate fantasy and he wanted to share it with someone. But again, don't feel obligated or do anything uncomfortable. Just saying maybe it's not a sunken ship yet. But maybe it is, I don't know.


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## increbresco (Mar 2, 2011)

God said:


> And I swear on my life (lol sorry) that this happened. This post sounds like trolling on steroids, but it's unfortunately all very real.
> 
> ugh..



And unfortunately very weird... Seriously people only expose a portion of their thoughts I think, its kinda like you only use 10% of your brain. And you just got 10% of his weirdness imagen the other 90% lurking in the back of his head. I`m no psychologist but i`d run, unless you like it.


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

increbresco said:


> And unfortunately very weird... Seriously people only expose a portion of their thoughts I think, its kinda like you only use 10% of your brain. And you just got 10% of his weirdness imagen the other 90% lurking in the back of his head. I`m no psychologist but i`d run, unless you like it.


That's EXACTLY what I'm thinking. This was probably merely a little taster sample of all the shit he daydreams about.

O_O;;


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## increbresco (Mar 2, 2011)

God said:


> That's EXACTLY what I'm thinking. This was probably merely a little taster sample of all the shit he daydreams about.
> 
> O_O;;


Seriously, he tried to butter the bread before he fed it to you... If it was a kosher idea why would he have to? You could done this like inside and jokingly and playful but, to actually dig a hole at night in the backyard? And then he lied about being drunk. That was the beginning, wheres the end, and how far will it go, and what will be between?

I started a thread early because all I want is casual sex, and I needed someone else to agree with me and I would feel that it was ok, and I think I have issues because of that. Haha


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## sprinkles (Feb 7, 2010)

I'm sorry... I can't believe I'm about to do this. But I just can't resist!

I know this guy freaked you out. He'd freak me out too. But I just... can't... help it! AUGH!






I'm sorry. Don't hurt me, please! XD


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

lol, yes, of course he was trying to BS about "being drunk".

The guy fed me a different excuse on each separate message for dying...I mean crying out loud.

urgh. >:x


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## Ormazd (Jan 26, 2010)

I don't quite understand your reaction here.

If you are uncomfortable just say no. And it's not like he actually is going out and having sex with dead people. He just wants you to bring him back to life with sex. :mellow: Sure it's weird, but that doesn't make him a bad person.


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

I've still got the pendant though. 

I can hawk it for a pretty penny, so I'm fucking PLEASED on that count.


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## increbresco (Mar 2, 2011)

God said:


> lol, yes, of course he was trying to BS about "being drunk".
> 
> The guy fed me a different excuse on each separate message for dying...I mean crying out loud.
> 
> urgh. >:x


Thats cause he is now facing the fact that it was an unacceptable behavior and may be regretting it. 

Its ok, I`m sure your find someone else thats fun and is not possibly gonna chop you into pieces!


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

Ormazd said:


> I don't quite understand your reaction here.
> 
> If you are uncomfortable just say no. And it's not like he actually is going out and having sex with dead people. He just wants you to bring him back to life with sex. :mellow: Sure it's weird, but that doesn't make him a bad person.


The guy *dug a fucking hole* in his backyard. It's also obvious that he had this all planned out WELL in advance, and took extreme measures. 

And it's like one of the posters said, that's probably only a teeny teaser. What if he wants to make the fantasy real - with the roles switched??

No. Just no.


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## MissJordan (Dec 21, 2010)

This is... Concerning...

He obviously meant it, it obviously spawned from his own mind.

I have heard of this one time, a guy asked a girl to pretend to be dead.
But, pretending you're the one that's dead?
That's a more insane than creepy... But it's still _very_ creepy...


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

MisterJordan said:


> This is... Concerning...
> 
> He obviously meant it, it obviously spawned from his own mind.
> 
> ...


lol, no. HE wanted to play dead. If he'd suggested me to be the "dead one", he'd already be getting served for a restraining order.

Not that it makes it any better. lol


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## MissJordan (Dec 21, 2010)

God said:


> lol, no. HE wanted to play dead. If he'd suggested me to be the "dead one", he'd already be getting served for a restraining order.
> 
> Not that it makes it any better. lol


That's what I said.

Pretending the person you're having sex with is dead = the highest order of creepy.
Pretending you are dead, when having sex with a person = creepy, but also very insane...


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## tooboku (Jun 9, 2010)

I'm a bit of a creep too I guess... but that doesn't seem all that weird. People have vampire and zombie fantasies all the time. The porn of it exists somewhere. "Debbie Does Dallas Again", Monique Alexander does it in a coffin. (I claim google as the reason I know that. <_< >_>) Maybe take it baby steps at a time with a sleep rape fantasy?

Anyway, it's all just sex in the end and I wouldn't give him too hard of a time for asking. At least he didn't ask you to shit into his mouth. If it creeps you out though, that's the last word. Don't do it if you're not comfortable.


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## Eerie (Feb 9, 2011)

Hawking a gift he got you just because his fetish doesn't appeal to you seems kind of harsh. There are far worse things that people are into out there. Far worse.


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## Proteus (Mar 5, 2010)

_Loving you was like loving the dead..._


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

"Oh baby, look at that sexy corpse there in the ditch. How I would love to ride that rigor mortis stick!"


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## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

Eerie said:


> Hawking a gift he got you just because his fetish doesn't appeal to you seems kind of harsh. There are far worse things that people are into out there. Far worse.


I have to agree here. I would just send it back. I understand how "different" it is but still, some people find doing it with the lights on and in a different position "taboo". I would at least have the courage to talk to the person about it and simply say my mind. Think of him and how nervous he must have been asking this request, I imagine that he must really really trust you and worried about how you were going to react to it. Trying to make you comfortable enough to share his "ultimate fantasy" with you. I don't know I'm kinda starting to feel for the guy now. His worst fears are realized. Still doesn't change the fact no one should ever do anything uncomfortable and feel obligated to do so either.


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## Ormazd (Jan 26, 2010)

God said:


> The guy *dug a fucking hole* in his backyard. It's also obvious that he had this all planned out WELL in advance, and took extreme measures.


I'm not sure how extreme his measures are, digging a hole (and buying a few things) for an "ultimate fantasy" seems like an appropriate level of exertion.

I can't help but think: the guy knows what he wants and is willing to work to get it, isn't this kind of behaviour usually lauded in society?




God said:


> And it's like one of the posters said, that's probably only a teeny teaser. What if he wants to make the fantasy real - with the roles switched??
> 
> No. Just no.


Again, ultimate fantasy. Probably won't get any worse than that. And I see absolutely no reason why this fantasy is indicitave of homicidal/psychopathic tendencies.

Lots of people are into bondage sado/masochistic dom/sub or whatever, I find these things abusive and I would never partake in them myself, but I don't think that the people doing something wrong, that's just what get's them off, good for them. They still function in society, they don't go around killing people or rape unwilling participants.


And I'm with Hokahey here, poor guy shows you something about himself that he's probably never showed anybody, and he was clearly nervous about it, and you run off. Don't do anything you're uncomfortable with, but your response seems exceedingly harsh for what he did.


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

Hokahey said:


> I have to agree here. I would just send it back. I understand how "different" it is but still, some people find doing it with the lights on and in a different position "taboo". I would at least have the courage to talk to the person about it and simply say my mind. Think of him and how nervous he must have been asking this request, I imagine that he must really really trust you and worried about how you were going to react to it. Trying to make you comfortable enough to share his "ultimate fantasy" with you. I don't know I'm kinda starting to feel for the guy now. His worst fears are realized. Still doesn't change the fact no one should ever do anything uncomfortable and feel obligated to do so either.


yeah, sorry, but there's stuff that I just will say no to and move on - like golden showers, spanking (partly because he does it way too hard, partly as I don't see what's erotic about that), anal sex.

But when it comes to anything with animals, children, or dead bodies...no. I run. lol

Seriously, if he even told a psychiatrist this, he'd be put away.

And to me, dreaming/fantasizing about doing something (especially if you involve other people to intentionally simulate it) is the same as doing it, minus the resources or "guts"...


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

Do you plan to stay with this guy after you gave him the _cold_ shoulder for his _dead_ serious offer? If I had any feelings or intention to make it last...or the sex was awesome, I might try it to get it out of his system. Some people will fantasize about it and their fantasy will never be met by the actual thing. I suppose it could have been worse, he could have requested you act dead and dress you up like a corpse.

It makes me think of this Canadian movie called Kissed (1996), I seriously want to vomit a little in my mouth every time I think of it. It's between raping the corpses and the mouse intestines. I think it's the mouse guts.


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## Eerie (Feb 9, 2011)

"And to me, dreaming/fantasizing about doing something (especially if you involve other people to intentionally simulate it) is the same as doing it, minus the resources or "guts"..." 

Just wow.

I guess someone better tell that to _a lot_ of women, concerning the number one fantasy - rape. You're right, role play is totally the same thing as reality.


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## Mr.Xl Vii (Jan 19, 2011)

Technically it's not necrophilia because he wasn't asking you to play dead. It's more like "I want to the be the corpse while you engage in necrophilia".


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## Noble4 (Feb 1, 2011)

If it was me I would have done it. No problem. I don't know if this is just me but if my girl asked me that I would have been like wtf (at first) and then three seconds later be all like "ahh fuck it" and do my thing.


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## Crystall (Mar 30, 2010)

DO IT!!! DO THAT HOT DEAD GUY IN THE DITCH!!!! :crazy: Nahh just kidding. I mean, I'd probably do it. But if you're not comfortable then you definitely shouldn't do it. If I was into all that then I personally would have tried to warm the dude up a bit before introducing him to the whole grave idea... I mean, digging the grave first and then springing it on you was a rookie mistake. I know Tucker Max took his girl out for a fancy dinner before she would give him anal, but at least she agreed to it before hand. 

I gotta ask though... aren't you a tiny bit curious as to where he was going with it though? Like, was he going to "wake up" suddenly and ravish you right there in the grave, or was he just going to lie there until he climaxed? I wanna know!!! 



God said:


> yeah, sorry, but there's stuff that I just will say no to and move on - like golden showers, spanking (partly because he does it way too hard, partly as I don't see what's erotic about that), anal sex.


Ah, see, cause I've done all of those. Hmm... guess I am kinda kinky.


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## killerB (Jan 14, 2010)

Well, at least he talked to you about it. I just don't think its really that weird. It is a fantasy, like any other fantasy. He wanted your awesome sex to bring him to life. He was probably trying to spice it up or something. It really is no different than "true Blood' where Bill grabs Sookies leg and draggs her into the dirt and they screw. That was a very, very sexy scene actually. Maybe it was an attempt to do a vampire fantasy or something. 

I have heard some really different stuff out there, golden showers, scatting, anal fisting, drinking blood, eating candy out of a woman vaginally, dressing up as little bo peep, etc. That is what a relationship is about, talking and sharing your fantasies, etc. You said no and the guy got the hint you were not comfortable with it, so I doubt that he will bring it up again anyhow.


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## tooboku (Jun 9, 2010)

Crystall said:


> DO IT!!! DO THAT HOT DEAD GUY IN THE DITCH!!!! :crazy: Nahh just kidding. I mean, I'd probably do it. But if you're not comfortable then you definitely shouldn't do it. If I was into all that then I personally would have tried to warm the dude up a bit before introducing him to the whole grave idea... I mean, digging the grave first and then springing it on you was a rookie mistake. I know Tucker Max took his girl out for a fancy dinner before she would give him anal, but at least she agreed to it before hand.
> 
> I gotta ask though... aren't you a tiny bit curious as to where he was going with it though? Like, was he going to "wake up" suddenly and ravish you right there in the grave, or was he just going to lie there until he climaxed? I wanna know!!!
> 
> ...


You and I need to talk more.


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## Noble4 (Feb 1, 2011)

Crystall said:


> Ah, see, cause I've done all of those. Hmm... guess I am kinda kinky.


That's a bad kitty right there. Straight up <3


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## Black Rabbit (Apr 15, 2010)

God said:


> And I swear on my life (lol sorry) that this happened. This post sounds like trolling on steroids, but it's unfortunately all very real.
> 
> ugh..


I'm on the fence about this one God. As much as I'd like to believe you, this would be an epic thread to troll members with. And I think you may recall that I'm no stranger to using elaborate, credible sounding stories to trigger emotional reactions, similar to this. ;-)

In the event you're telling the truth, well, that's unusual. If you decide to go through with the graveyard sex make sure he's at least stiff.


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## MissJordan (Dec 21, 2010)

Maybe this is actually his subtle way of getting you to do all the work in bed... Or rather... In hole...


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## increbresco (Mar 2, 2011)

So... are you still together?


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## dagnytaggart (Jun 6, 2010)

Eerie said:


> "And to me, dreaming/fantasizing about doing something (especially if you involve other people to intentionally simulate it) is the same as doing it, minus the resources or "guts"..."
> 
> Just wow.
> 
> I guess someone better tell that to _a lot_ of women, concerning the number one fantasy - rape. You're right, role play is totally the same thing as reality.


I honestly don't get that. By definition, rape is nonconsenting sex, but to secretly want it defies the definition. But whatever. I'm talking about the mentality behind the dreamer and the mentality behind the doer.



killerB said:


> I have heard some really different stuff out there, golden showers, scatting, anal fisting, drinking blood, eating candy out of a woman vaginally, dressing up as little bo peep, etc. That is what a relationship is about, talking and sharing your fantasies, etc. You said no and the guy got the hint you were not comfortable with it, so I doubt that he will bring it up again anyhow.


None of those really creep me out as much. The scat and blood I'd just say no to, for dignity and hygiene, respectively. But my opinion is that raping a dead body is just...just....ew. Why? How?



Troisi said:


> I'm on the fence about this one God. As much as I'd like to believe you, this would be an epic thread to troll members with. And I think you may recall that I'm no stranger to using elaborate, credible sounding stories to trigger emotional reactions, similar to this. ;-)
> 
> In the event you're telling the truth, well, that's unusual. If you decide to go through with the graveyard sex make sure he's at least stiff.


idk what troll threads you've made, but I think you're just mad that this loony toon is the same type as you. 



increbresco said:


> So... are you still together?


eh...idk. I just can't get over this. He called me a bunch today, so earlier tonight I dropped off the pendant (le sigh!) and told him I'd figure things out later, but that I need space right now.

He kept insisting for me to keep the pendant and profusely apologized. I told him that he shouldn't apologize for his fetishes, but that he's given *me* a lot of food for thought.

what a fuckin freak..


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## vel (May 17, 2010)

hmm ... sex + life-death imagery ... he might be trying to resolve some rather deep and convoluted questions through his fantasies

sounds like you don't trust him on that level yet, so he made his move premature ... of course if you feel that you don't trust a person is it fully your right to refuse to do anything of the sort with him, doesn't even matter the content of fantasies involved


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## kindaconfused (Apr 30, 2010)

God said:


> Am I going to have to worry about this guy cheating on me with a mummy?
> 
> !


lolzes!!!!!!!!!!!


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## kindaconfused (Apr 30, 2010)

I think you were going to end up in that hole. And he is Jeffrey Dahmer.


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## magnus una (Sep 7, 2010)

some things should remain fantasies, but at least he didn't want you to play dead


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

kindaconfused said:


> I think you were going to end up in that hole. And he is Jeffrey Dahmer.


Jeffrey Dahmer never buried anyone, he ate them or dissolved their body in a vat. If you want to be specific, he ground up his first victims bones and spread them allover his parent's backyard.


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

Crystall said:


> I second this. Let's make a new one!


He's going to, he just needs to write it up.


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## MissJordan (Dec 21, 2010)

Fizz said:


> Be careful, if it's happened already it could be shot down.


There's been two 'What turns you on?' threads...

And I'm not into recycling threads...


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

Trust your gut, God. You were the only person who actually experienced this and was creeped out by it. There are far too many victims out there that don't. Why take that risk when you notice your own internal alarms going off? You'd be beating yourself up later if something even creepier happens. 



Eerie said:


> Hawking a gift he got you just because his fetish doesn't appeal to you seems kind of harsh. There are far worse things that people are into out there. Far worse.


That's what he gets for trying to buy her. He tried to use guilt manipulation on her. Some women would have fallen for it and would have gone against their own values and instincts. I would have dumped him on the spot just for that alone.

Good going, God. Although it sounds like you gave the pendant back. But good going not falling for the manipulation.


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## SyndiCat (Oct 2, 2010)

Dead doesn't do it to me. She can be passed out though. Where's the chloroform? You know she'll hate you for it because she wanted in on the action.


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## Shield of Light (Aug 28, 2010)

You would sell the pendant he bought for you even after he called you back a million times to try to apologize?

Cold. I hope you were trolling. :sad:


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## Compassionate Misanthrope (Mar 2, 2011)

Shield of Light said:


> You would sell the pendant he bought for you even after he called you back a million times to try to apologize?
> 
> Cold. I hope you were trolling. :sad:


Yeah I do kinda feel bad for the guy. I don't think that he was trying to "buy her" either. We're trained to give gifts to show love, and also trained to show love before initiating sex. Yeah he's weird but we have no evidence to show that he was a bad guy... just freaky weird. Personally I think that trying to reconcile "eros and thanatos" is less weird than mixing sex and shit. 

They're both freaky weird but meh.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

Compassionate Misanthrope said:


> Yeah I do kinda feel bad for the guy. I don't think that he was trying to "buy her" either. We're trained to give gifts to show love, and also trained to show love before initiating sex. Yeah he's weird but we have no evidence to show that he was a bad guy... just freaky weird. Personally I think that trying to reconcile "eros and thanatos" is less weird than mixing sex and shit.
> 
> They're both freaky weird but meh.


Wow. And apparently his guilt manipulation would even work on some men ^^^.

Don't judge his motives with yours, Mr. ENFP.


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

Is it bad that when I was reading that, I was mostly just thinking about how awesome it would be to get a guy whose ultimate fantasy was something unusual, interesting, and non-degrading?


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## tooboku (Jun 9, 2010)

God said:


> I had a really good talk with him. He understood my concerns and his justifications made sense to me. His attempt at "easing me into it" simply backfired. He said that he just wanted to feel like he was a piece of inanimate meat yet "so desired that even when he died, I'd still be fucking him relentlessly, even if I had to scrape him out from underground and pick off the earthworms"


Dude worded that wrong. He really meant something deeper than that. It's pretty romantic from my point of view but yeah... that's like saying "I love you" on the first date.


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## Compassionate Misanthrope (Mar 2, 2011)

pinkrasputin said:


> Wow. And apparently his guilt manipulation would even work on some men ^^^.
> 
> Don't judge his motives with yours, Mr. ENFP.


Hehe don't judge his motives with your take on romantic gift-giving Ms. ENFP  

You've well established that you are not one of the many people who perceive and accept love primarily in the form of material/time sacrifice. I am the same way. Consider that we are taught to assume that the way to a woman's heart is through dinner and shinies... I think we should give him the benefit of the doubt. 

One could just as easily argue that if he had written her a love song, that he was trying to guilt her into weird freaky sympathy sex.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

Compassionate Misanthrope said:


> Hehe don't judge his motives with your take on romantic gift-giving Ms. ENFP
> 
> You've well established that you are not one of the many people who perceive and accept love primarily in the form of material/time sacrifice. I am the same way. Consider that we are taught to assume that the way to a woman's heart is through dinner and shinies... I think we should give him the benefit of the doubt.
> 
> One could just as easily argue that if he had written her a love song, that he was trying to guilt her into weird freaky sympathy sex.


Guys don't write love songs for sympathy sex. They walk around saying things like "I never get women. Waaa." And "My animal just died. My wife just left me...." Believe me. It's worked on me a couple of times. Mother Uckers.


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## Fizz (Nov 13, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> Guys don't write love songs for sympathy sex. They walk around saying things like "I never get women. Waaa." And "My animal just died. My wife just left me...." Believe me. It's worked on me a couple of times. Mother Uckers.


Too many mother uckers uckin' with your shh?

The "I never get women. Waaa." is an oldie. It doesn't really work on me, I can usually look 'em up and down and go, "Oh don't worry, I know." - especially with that desperate plea.


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## Compassionate Misanthrope (Mar 2, 2011)

pinkrasputin said:


> Guys don't write love songs for sympathy sex. They walk around saying things like "I never get women. Waaa." And "My animal just died. My wife just left me...." Believe me. It's worked on me a couple of times. Mother Uckers.


Lol what if the song of unrequited love is more general in nature... like: "OooooOOoo I love women... oooOooOOoOo but I never get looven OOoooOOooOooOo"

See we could both be right :crazy:


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

A lot of the men who complain that they never get women are failing because they aren't focusing on a specific woman, and instead are lumping the whole group together, thinking "I want one of those," as though we were interchangeable, but there are some who have a legitimate complaint, who haven't encountered the kind of woman who would appreciate their uniqueness yet. This is especially true if they are passive, sensitive, or quirky in ways that get misinterpreted as 'red flags.' I discern the reason the man is lonely, seek out the interesting sweet ones while gently rejecting the other kind, but despite my best efforts, my tendency to give people the benefit of the doubt leads me to occasionally find out that their quirks really were red flags after all.


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## Shield of Light (Aug 28, 2010)

We all have our own unique and stupid ways to try and appeal to the opposite sex. Some work, some don't.

To each their own I suppose. :wink:


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## sofort99 (Mar 27, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> Guys don't write love songs for sympathy sex. They walk around saying things like "I never get women. Waaa." And "My animal just died. My wife just left me...." Believe me. It's worked on me a couple of times. Mother Uckers.


Oww! Oww! I've got a charlie horse! and a splinter! And maybe a hang nail?


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## Mutatio NOmenis (Jun 22, 2009)

Just do it for him.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

sofort99 said:


> Oww! Oww! I've got a charlie horse! and a splinter! And maybe a hang nail?


@sofort99

Oh you poor thing! Here. Take my shirt. :laughing:


I have an ex, who will still text me photos of his cuts and broken fingers.


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## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> broken fingers.


Only fingers?

Amateur. Haha :laughing:


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## HIX (Aug 20, 2018)

Funniest thread ever


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## Tropes (Jul 7, 2016)

hufflepunk said:


> Roflmfao.
> 
> Real talk, I mean...do YOUR kinks mean anything more than what they are? If you like to be choked, does it mean you want to be murdered via asphyxiation? If you like to be spanked, does it mean you got off on spankings as a 5 year old? I honestly do believe that fetishes mean something, but the reasoning can be far too general to understand.
> 
> The answer to both questions is likely no. Which is to say, it might be unfair to make these types of judgments about him based on this kink. Especially without knowing what it is ABOUT "playing dead" (lol) that he likes. Why consider ending a relationship over an assumption? I think you should at least have a conversation to try to get some answers first. Don't lose someone who's been otherwise great to you over a misunderstanding.


I am guessing it means he grew up watching b-rated horror flicks and has a bit of an emo side justifying why their tropes have more metaphorical significance then anyone has ever intended. I grew up on Buffy the vampire layer and I'm still into neck biting (and Spike's cheekbones).


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## Scoobyscoob (Sep 4, 2016)

The OP has to be a troll post. :mellow:

Also, I'm going to go out on a limb and say OP and corpsey boy ended up back together and are engaged/married by now. :laughing:

Christmas movie gift suggestions: Corpse Bride, anything else by Tim Burton really, Frankenstein, Weekend at Bernies, Night of the Living Dead: The porno, etc!


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## Echoe (Apr 23, 2012)

I'm glad this thread resurfaced. That is all.


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## Intricate Mystic (Apr 3, 2010)

Essentially, the guy is turned on by the idea of being dead and having someone have sex with his dead body without his consent. These types of kinky sexual desires are classified by mental health practiioners as paraphilias. Sometimes paraphilias are fun and nobody gets hurt, such as someone having a mild foot fetish. However, at the far end of the paraphilia spectrum people can die. I think the OP's guy's fantasy is firmly on the deviant end of sexual practices. In addition, who knows what other fantasies he may have? In the future he could decide he wants someone to actually kill him and engage in necrophilia. I would steer clear.


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