# There ARE other ENFPs in this world!



## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

Well hello...
I'm excited to join Personality Cafe and happy to finally meet people other ENFPs! I've always been extroverted, emotional, super affectionate, optimistic and curious about life to the point of being annoying to less curious types. Lately however, I find solitude can also be healing. (I'll swing back to the gregarious side in a week or two!)

When I'm bouncing around hugging everyone, people always stare, wondering how I can love EVERYbody, even strangers. And I do. I used to wonder why it's so difficult for other people. My family has been told, in my eventual 'U-googily', they better say, "If she hugged you, she loved you and if she loved you, then she adored you!" If there were only a way to earn a living hugging... IS there? 

I'll enjoy hearing from ENFPs who have all that desire to connect with others, and who express their nature openly. BUt I'll also look forward to reading about everyone else too! Isn't it facinating how we can complement each other as friends, spouses and siblings?

Small tidbits: I'm a Sangine, a 7 enneagram, a middle child and also married with a family of my own. I'm currently trying sculpture, like to write hokey songs and poetry, and have a variety of interests I keep starting, stopping and returning to, like learning Spanish. I'm 45 this November. 
Well, I guess that's 'it!'
Thanks for reading this! Bella


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## Mr. CafeBot (Jun 13, 2009)

*Welcome to PersonalityCafe!*

*You are hearing a robotic sounding voice coming towards you*



Greetings Bella6000 and welcome to PersonalityCafe!! My name is Mr. CafeBot. I am here to personally greet you and thank you for joining our humble little forum. No matter your type, you will surely experience a wonderful time with the members of this forum. We cater to all personality types so you will never feel alone or weird. Truth is this forum is full of weirdos!! Pleazeee hel.... *Ahem*I mean we have the nicest people you will ever meet. 

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Again, welcome to our forum Bella6000. We hope that your experience with us is tremendously benevolent!

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## Blueguardian (Aug 22, 2009)

Hi, welcome hope it suits you here. Your small tidbits are probably more than my life's accomplishments. :S


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## slowriot (Nov 11, 2008)

hello and welcome


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## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

Hi everybody! Thanks for writing!


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## Blueguardian (Aug 22, 2009)

Np. Usually more do. They must be lagging. ^.-


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## Viktoria2 (Feb 15, 2009)

*Bella, please tell me your name has no relation to Twilight...
Welcome to Personality Cafe! roud:roud:I'm glad you found it here, and I know you'll like it. 
*


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## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

*I'm sorry I must tell you...;')*

Bella is not my real name. And yes, it has everything to do with Twilight. I'm almost 45 and a friend told me recentlly I look like Bella in one of my pictures. I don't really see that, but I figure, in 6000 years she might look just like me! I normally use Belle from Beauty and the Beast, but Bella is fun for now. If I can find a pale creepy picture for my profile, I will upload it!


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## Viktoria2 (Feb 15, 2009)

Bella6000 said:


> Bella is not my real name. And yes, it has everything to do with Twilight. I'm almost 45 and a friend told me recentlly I look like Bella in one of my pictures. I don't really see that, but I figure, in 6000 years she might look just like me! I normally use Belle from Beauty and the Beast, but Bella is fun for now. If I can find a pale creepy picture for my profile, I will upload it!


*Haha, alright, fair enough. Hey, I'm just glad you've found something you love. I had a feeling it had to do with Twilight. *:laughing:


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## Dr. Metallic (Nov 15, 2008)

Greetings and Salutations, Bella. Enjoy your browses :laughing:


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## Kevinaswell (May 6, 2009)

You were having trouble finding ENFP's?

Weird.


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## Leanh (Sep 8, 2009)

Yes! We're not alone! It's an amazing feeling, isn't it? xD Welcome.


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## Ćerulean (Nov 18, 2008)

Thanks for joining up! =P


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## Closet Extrovert (Mar 11, 2009)

Hello, welcome. From what you've said in your posts, you seem like a bubbly person. It's nice to have another ENFP join us! *bows* :happy:roud:


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## skycloud86 (Jul 15, 2009)

*Welcome to the forum :happy:*


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## Zaria (Jan 11, 2009)

Hey Bella, welcome!

And yeah, sure. Of course there are other ENFP's in the world.
Hurray, I would say! :crazy:


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## HenRickunit (Aug 26, 2009)

ENFP'S RULE! My best friend is one. Sorry you have to EARN my HUGS :wink:

Welcome. Chill out with the wild variety if MIBTMITechBriggs  whatever personalities.

Publid Service Anouncement: :shocked: And don't abuse the smilies :angry:


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## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

I want to say for the record, I have only read the first book in the Twilight series. I had a friend tell me the whole series from beginning to end so I wouldn't have to read the rest and get 'attached!' Do other personality types need tons of friends to hug or is this an ENFP thing?


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## knght990 (Jul 28, 2009)

Salutations


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## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

I haven't known too many ENFPs because I'm generally attracted to calmer types for friends and love. Or maybe if I have met enfps, I haven't known because of our limited aquaintance. I know several introverted intuitives, and oddly, have an affinity for Libra males as friends, whether extroverted _or_ introverted. 

One thing about intuition: When I was young, I had extreme intuition, but it was conditioned out of me by someone who wanted to oppress me. Someone who constantly told me my feelings were wrong, incorrect. That was long ago thankfully and the greatest thing is, when they are held down, intuition and personality fight their way to the surface! More often lately, my intuition is right on, and I'm trying not to ignore it. But sometimes I do because I don't want to face the truth. When I can feel something is wrong or 'off', I don't always act on it and then I regret it. But I get over problems pretty quickly and go bouncing off in some other direction! 

I'm curious about your experiences with intuition. And thanks for the welcome! 
Bella


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## HollyGolightly (Aug 8, 2009)

Bella6000 said:


> I haven't known too many ENFPs because I'm generally attracted to calmer types for friends and love. Or maybe if I have met enfps, I haven't known because of our limited aquaintance. I know several introverted intuitives, and oddly, have an affinity for Libra males as friends, whether extroverted _or_ introverted.
> 
> One thing about intuition: When I was young, I had extreme intuition, but it was conditioned out of me by someone who wanted to oppress me. Someone who constantly told me my feelings were wrong, incorrect. That was long ago thankfully and the greatest thing is, when they are held down, intuition and personality fight their way to the surface! More often lately, my intuition is right on, and I'm trying not to ignore it. But sometimes I do because I don't want to face the truth. When I can feel something is wrong or 'off', I don't always act on it and then I regret it. But I get over problems pretty quickly and go bouncing off in some other direction!
> 
> ...


Hey new ENFP. My little sister is an ENFP and she's always hugging me. She's hugs everyone. She has a lot of love to share 
My intuition was squashed out of me, well tried to be, when i was young. But now it's coming back and I'm training myself to listen to it. It's never lets me down, I let myself down by ignoring it.

Anyway, welcome to the forum 
*offers you cookies*


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## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

Thanks HollyGolightly!
It's amazing how intuition is one of the gifts that serves us best but we and others tend to discount it. Good to know we're both learning how to listen to it. 

It's fun to read everyone's thoughts and wonderings on this site! I think ENFP's can seem superficial because we're talkative and easy to get to know, but I like to get to the heart. I want to have a close friendship with every friend, something of real depth. 

Also I read somewhere that ENFPs divulge secrets, but that's not me at all. I value discretion and loyalty so much, it shocks me when others spill confidences. Usually it takes a few times or something irrevocably severe for me to think the worst of someone. Years back people called me and a good friend of mine, The Gullible Twins because we believed in everybody and believed everybody. Still learning!

Thanks for your affirmation! Cool about your sister too.


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## firedell (Aug 5, 2009)

Welcome Bella! =]


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## Selene (Aug 2, 2009)

I hope some of your savage hugging power comes in my direction. :happy:

Welcome!


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## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

Selene, thanks for the welcome! I'm giving you a spiritual hug right now! Hope you have a wonderful and peaceful day!


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## Selene (Aug 2, 2009)

roud: [feels loved]


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## Irulan (Aug 14, 2009)

Hi Bella!

I'm Bethany! Sometimes I act like an ENFP when I'm around large groups of people! (I can't always control my subconscious impulses!) Everyone likes me but I come off as rather tipsy when I do that since I'm really very much an introvert! haha... I kind of amuse myself with my ridiculousness.

I've never met an ENFP who was not at least a little bit huggy! I know one who gave me a big hug the first moment he met me. Awkward... lol... But I could tell it was just the way he was and that he wasn't creepy - thanks to my intuitive abilities.


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## MandiJayne (Sep 8, 2009)

Welcome, Bella. When you figure out how to make a living hugging and just loving everybody, please let me know...perhaps we can embark on a joint venture. LOL


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## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

Mandijane, if i can find a way, I will let you know! :happy:Hugs are like air to me! 
I was in a check-out line and a woman was sharing something really personal with me, which happens often, and I asked if a hug would be appropriate and she said, "Oh YES!" so I gave her a big one and we both felt great! I guess it's possible to be outgoing without being 'huggy', but I think ENFPs are more exhuberant about it and less discriminating. Once, I was training new employees at work and a supervisor came up to me and said, "No hugging on the first day." I did my best to look shocked that he would suggest I would do such a thing, and I said, "I just met these people!" But a couple did hug me the _next_ day. 

One serious thing though, is that our affection for others can mask our pain. People are used to us being positive, optimistic extroverts and we're normally so engaged with them that we can have a hard time talking about our own losses or worries. We're fortunate to have friends who love us as we are, even when we're 'in the negative.'


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## MandiJayne (Sep 8, 2009)

Question for you Bella. I have found this to be the case for me, but maybe not for all ENFPs. Do you use your interest in other people to hide your inability to fix your own problems? Perhaps kind of a way to stick your head in the sand, but still have it visible? I never noticed that I was doing that so much until I hit my 30s, but the older I get the more I realize that I hide from my issues by being so keenly involved in other peoples'. 

That doesn't change the fact that it is a true deep affinity for other people and a desire and almost compulsion to know everything about another person. My husband calls it nosey, but I tell him that nosey has a bad vibe attached so I prefer the word concern. I truly want to know for benign reasons, I consider nosey to be for personal gain at the expense of the other person. However, I guess if there were a deep analysis maybe there are some bits of both. Who knows.

I notice that you are 7, which makes you a bit different as I have tested as 2 (though 7 is my second highest enneagram) and maybe that makes a difference. I just thought I would see if you have found that to be true since you brought up the "serious" side. Definitely being a 2 is truly about anticipating the needs for everyone else that you really wish someone would be filling for you, including the huggy, touchy, feely ones that we have. I guess in that way I get to fill my own. <smile> 

Gosh that sounds way more debbie downer than it should. I'm truly perpetually optimistic...just once in a while I notice that there may be a bit of a dark side that peeks through and it has to be smacked back where it belongs, so I find somebody else who has a problem that I feel sure that I can definitely fix so I have to focus all of my attention on figuring out how to do that. LOL


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## Eylrid (Jun 25, 2009)

Welcome to Personality Cafe, Bella!


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## Lilsnowy (Sep 9, 2009)

*fixing our problems*

Hi MandiJayne. I'll try to answer your question. I've always connected with others and at times that has _masked_ my pain or delayed pain. I haven't necessarily been aware that's what I'm doing, but it lightens me up to connect emotionally and physically (hugs or touch.) Once I understand a problem, I work to fix it, either by seeking God, getting counsel from friends I trust, professional counseling, or just determination to break a habit or behavior. If I'm frustrated about a recurring problem, I may _escape_ from it in postive relationships, but it doesn't really hide my inability to fix it. More like I hide _from _it and feel good.

The other part to this, is my intense curiosity about people.I see you have the same intensity and have been misunderstood as I have. I ask a lot of questions because I want to know you, not because I'm 'all up in your business.' And I think most people know that about me or can perceive that I have no ulterior motive except curiosity. Although I'm sure I can be annoying: I have a friend who's an introverted intuitive and he will look at me and say, "Ya know, you could learn a lot just by watching." He's a good friend. I trust him and know he's a little annoyed, but he's also right. 
I could be a _little_ quieter.
I hope this helps you, MadiJayne. Oh, as an aside, being 'nosy' is related to gossip as far as I'm concerned. When a person has to know as much as she can so either she has more info than anyone else or has something good to share. People might think we're nosy, but our intent isn't that. I hate gossip or being 'in the know.' I like people and I'm interested in them. I know you understand me.
Have a good night!


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