# MBTI type and Love Language



## MyName (Oct 23, 2009)

INTJ-touch and words of affirmation


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## DAPHNE XO (Jan 16, 2012)

NFJ: Quality time and physical touch

...Guess I'ma needy basterd.


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## mooray (Nov 22, 2011)

ISFP

words of affirmation and quality time


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## Pelopra (May 21, 2013)

ENTP-
acts of service
touch

(some day i will write up some long ramble on further thoughts on this topic)

...anyone find any correlations yet?

----

edit: quick tabulation of results thus far (function order does not follow rank in personality necessarily): 

Ne-Ti
Touch/QT

Ne-Fi

Touch, WoA

Se-Ti:
WoA QT

Si-Te:
QT

Ne-Fi:
QT, touch

Ne-Ti
Touch Gifts

Ni-Te:
QT, Aos

Si-Te
QT Touch

Ni-Fe
QT AoS

Ne-Fi
Touch QT

Ne-Fi
WoA QT

Si-Te 
QT

Ni-Te
Touch WoA

Ni-Fe
QT Touch

Se-Fi
WoA QT

Ne-Ti
Touch, AoS

---

what I see: A fairly clear correlation between N, (especially Ne?), and listing touch as one of the top two. (obviously sample size isn't very large, but only 1 out of the 5 Ss listed it, as opposed to 8/11 N's)

QT is definitely the #1 language (amongst those types that responded)... (so weird for me, I would totally have guessed AoS but apparently that's just because that's my personal #1) 
3 out of the 4 people who did _not_ list QT were NTs (the last one was an NF). (The two remaining NTs-- 1 Ne-Ti, 1 Ni-Te-- did list it)

Nothing else leaps out at me.


Sample distribution:

out of 16 respondents:
Ne: 7
Ni: 4
Se: 2
Si: 3
--
Ti: 4
Te: 5
Fi: 5
Fe: 2


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## kitsu (Feb 13, 2013)

ENFP and quality time isn't really one of mine... It's important of course but I find discussion/contrasting of ideas to be the most bonding thing there is. A person _is_ their thoughts, but I don't need to see them frequently or lengthily.

Edit: Yes and touch.


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## Pelopra (May 21, 2013)

Hurricane said:


> ENFP and quality time isn't really one of mine... It's important of course but I find discussion/contrasting of ideas to be the most bonding thing there is. A person _is_ their thoughts, but I don't need to see them frequently or lengthily.
> 
> Edit: Yes and touch.


"Yes and touch" isn't (in your top two, just like QT isn't), or "yes and touch" is (in your top two... what does the 'and' mean?)?


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## Pelopra (May 21, 2013)

Hurricane said:


> ENFP and quality time isn't really one of mine... It's important of course but I find discussion/contrasting of ideas to be the most bonding thing there is. A person _is_ their thoughts, but I don't need to see them frequently or lengthily.
> 
> Edit: Yes and touch.


Another thought:
this could all be more useful if choices were (much) more clearly defined. What a person thinks the words "Quality Time" mean would affect the answer. Someone could say "discussing/contrasting ideas" IS quality time, for example.


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## kitsu (Feb 13, 2013)

Pelopra said:


> "Yes and touch" isn't (in your top two, just like QT isn't), or "yes and touch" is (in your top two... what does the 'and' mean?)?
> 
> Another thought:
> this could all be more useful if choices were (much) more clearly defined. What a person thinks the words "Quality Time" mean would affect the answer. Someone could say "discussing/contrasting ideas" IS quality time, for example.


Sorry, I saw people mentioning touch being a big one for intuitives only after I'd made my post. I would say that is a top 2, yes. Kind of contradictory with my not needing quality time haha

Well nowadays discussion can be done from a distance. I guess I just didn't count in quality time because I don't tend to need to have the person around a lot (that doesn't mean I enjoy distance more though). The companionship is more in the mind for me, knowing there's someone on your wavelength out there who you can share the complexity that derives from intuition with. I meet so few people I find intricate enough to level with me...


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## Recon777 (May 24, 2013)

INTJ

12/12 Physical Touch *
8/12 Quality Time
6/12 Words of Affirmation
4/12 Acts of Service
0/12 Receiving Gifts


* I should note that "physical touch" is something I'm only truly comfortable with a spouse. In general social interactions, when people touch me casually, I find it a bit uncomfortable.


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## Pelopra (May 21, 2013)

Recon777 said:


> INTJ
> * I should note that "physical touch" is something I'm only truly comfortable with a spouse. In general social interactions, when people touch me casually, I find it a bit uncomfortable.


That is so classic INTJ it made me laugh.


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## Recon777 (May 24, 2013)

What, the fact that I don't typically like casual physical touch, or the fact that I put a footnote in my answers?


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## Pelopra (May 21, 2013)

Recon777 said:


> What, the fact that I don't typically like casual physical touch, or the fact that I put a footnote in my answers?


Both.

(My relationship (as a very touch-person) with a close INTJ friend went like this:
Year one: Aaah! Don't touch me! 
Year two: Your allotted allowance of touch is once a month.
Year three: HUGS! ...but i am slightly embarrassed that I like them so stop laughing and hug me already.)


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## Recon777 (May 24, 2013)

Wow I can't imagine that. Physical touch is my most important desire of expressing and also receiving love _with a wife_. When I was with my INFJ ex, she was so anti-affection it drove me crazy. I'm very cuddly, as a husband. I've heard that many INTJs are extremely affectionate to the one person who they've dropped their guard with.


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## Pelopra (May 21, 2013)

...I just realized my post did not specify that said INTJ was a friend. Have edited.


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## Devrim (Jan 26, 2013)

ENFJ

Says here I like Quality Time and Acts of Service xD


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## CosmicJosh (May 20, 2013)

If raw data is what's needed, I can give a bunch of friends and family's results...

ENFP (Girlfriend)
Touch
WoA

ISTJ (Dad)
Quality Time
Gifts or WoA

ENFJ (Mom)
Acts of Service
Touch

INFP (Brother)
Touch
WoA

ISTJ (Brother)
Quality Time
Gifts

ENFP (Sister)
Touch
Acts of Service

ISFP (Best friend)
Quality Time
WoA

ESTJ (Girlfriend's Dad)
Quality Time
WoA [I think]


Get and ISTJ or INTJ to make this into an excel document! 

This forum is actually really awesome by the way, just saying.


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## Recon777 (May 24, 2013)

CosmicJosh said:


> ISTJ (Dad)
> Quality Time
> Gifts or WoA
> 
> ...


Whoa, talk about the odd couple! Did your mom feel rather unfulfilled perhaps?


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## Choice (May 19, 2012)

ESTP

Receiving: Quality Time
Giving: Words of affirmation


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## CosmicJosh (May 20, 2013)

Well, at times, the J's clash with each other pretty intensely, but I'm not so sure about unfulfilled... my dad can actually be very thoughtful when it comes to blessing my mom, like cleaning house before she get's home, and giving her hugs when she needs them.

It's pretty weird actually, they barely have any overlap. But they are both happy, so, I guess it's all good, huh?


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## Recon777 (May 24, 2013)

Yes indeed, its actually very encouraging. I'm courting an ENFJ woman and I've read comments saying such a combo is not advised. I'm optimistic though. Our love languages line up, so that's a good bonus too.


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## CosmicJosh (May 20, 2013)

So actually though, I was partially incorrect.

ISTJ
Quality Time
WoA

ENFJ
Acts of Service
WoA

So, there is overlap.

And seeing as how I'm courting an ENFP, I'm not one to say that the Myers Briggs pairing always works. I think, the two things you need are, common: goals, aspirations, morals and faith AND respect for each other's differences.

ENFJ's can be pretty intense sometimes, but they balance that out with fun, and a sometimes surprisingly sweet nature. 

Good luck by the way!


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## Pelopra (May 21, 2013)

CosmicJosh said:


> If raw data is what's needed, I can give a bunch of friends and family's results...
> 
> ENFP (Girlfriend)
> Touch
> ...


I'm still seeing the N-touch correlation.

I wonder if any other N's have a theory why we're so touchy? 

My rationalization for liking touch was I like how you can convey a lot without words--- but seeing as that _exact same reasoning_ applies to _every_ language other than WoA, that's clearly not it.

I wonder if it has to do with needing to be "grounded"? Or maybe that N's will have S in their 3rd/4th functions, aka their "needs/desires"?


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## Flaming Rain (May 2, 2013)

*INTP:* 
Quality time
Touch

I express my love through touch and AoS.


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## bokuto (Sep 4, 2015)

isfp
- acts of service (STRONGLY first)
- quality time
- physical touch and gifts (tied)
- words of affirmation

honestly people complimenting/reassuring/etc me makes me really, really uncomfortable and i cant exactly place why!


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