# Hate towards my friend grows bigger day after day...



## DasPhillipBrau (Apr 2, 2010)

Im so fucking sick of this guy, so fucking sick of his huge ego, his lack of respect for girls, his incredible stupidity and awful-always wrong stubborness...

ok first of all...what can I tell you about him...well this guy thinks that he is the complete absolute shit and he thinks that everyone else are crap...the worst part is that he actually let them know what he thinks...he is always criticizing you or everyone else, always looking for new ways to make you feel like shit (he just logged on in MSN and I almost hit the screen just with seeing his damm picture)
he has a huge ego, he thinks he can do whatever he wants, he also brags a lot because he is "american" but its all bullshit...his father is american and his mother is not) so he is constantly bragging about how "americans are better at everything...oh is that american? then its great! not like the crap that they do in this country, or in that one...oh that seems like a nice country to me...but there is a problem, its NOT AMERICA!!!"
when the guy talks in public (like exposing something in class or something) he makes a terrible and ultra annoying accent, again to brag he is american (he makes what he thinks to be some sort of "american talking spanish" accent but its all bullshit the guy talks spanish with perfect accent when he is not exposing)
he thinks he can do whatever he wants and as soon you tell him you want to do something he goes "No, you cant do that because you have this problem and that one so you are not qualified for that"
The guy will take interest on things only if you tell him you want to do that...for example me and my friends (that guy included) were planning to make a band, and I said that I wanted to play the keyboard/piano.
as soon as I say that...the guy stares at me "discretly" with that "hmmm lets see how that goes for you *evil laughter*" look
then one day later he tells to the guys "Hey I remember that I have an old keyboard at my house, and I dont know why but I suddenly got this desire to learn how to play it so now im learning and well im going to be playing the keyboard and doing the vocals" (he has a horrible voice) at this point, I dont even look at him, but there is extreme rage inside of me for his action...he only started the piano classes cus he wanted to take the pianist position away from me, and it is not that he hates me, no, he will do that with ANYONE.
The guy is extremely stubborn, and I recognize that I am also VERYYYY stubborn, but there is a small difference...at least I am right! he is never right, all the things in which he gets stubborn with are complete bullshit, at least I dont go around bullshitting people with my stubborness as he does.
then comes the ladies...oh dear lord...
the guy had a girlfriend, who happened to be a girl I consider my sister and I really mean that. he never loved her, he only thought she was pretty for the first 3 months of the relationship (they lasted 1,5 year) then he got "bored" of her. so the guy cheated on her for more than 30 times and I cant even count the number of different girls he made out with during that "relationship"
the guy has no respect for girls, for example he ask them ANYTHING but with a pervert tone (and its not intentional) or he will touch them sometimes in places where he shouldnt, or he would say intentionally things like "if you would be my girlfriend...I would fuck you so good" the worst part is that girls cant see that he is a hypocrite with a bunch of faces and that he only tells those things to them to "make them fall in the trap".
the guy will cheat on any of his girlfriends because "as soon as he see a prettier woman, he gets bored of his current girlfriend" and he has done this a lot of times.
one of the most fuckig douchebag actions he does is to actually try to STEAL (you know what I mean...) the girl that you currently like and you are dating...as soon as he realizes that you like a girl, the guy goes and talks that girl and "befriends her" (even if the guy didnt knew her) and then like 1 month later he "makes a move" and makes out with them (or tries to) ONLY BECAUSE YOU WERE DATING THOSE GIRLS!!! as if he was trying to say something like "remember that im always the boss around here..."
that is why I never let that guy to socialize with the last girl I dated...and I succeeded, and I told her how the guy was like and he told me that she really hated him even without knowing him...so thats one less "lose end" to worry about...
anyways...now the guy got a "crush" with my BEST FRIEND, and no fucking way im gonna let that fucker hurt her...the girl was in love with another guy, my "friend" came over and started flirting with her now she is kind of in love with the guy. she knows the kind of guy he is, that he has cheated on almost every of his girlfriends and that he actually didnt love those girls...but she thinks that the guy is "ready for a change of attitude" and that he will not do that with her...but I KNOW he will! I know that 3 months after they start a relationship...he will start looking for a girl to cheat on her...(as a matter of fact he is already flirting with like 3 girls besides her...)
so no fucking way im gonna let that douche break my best friend's heart, she has already gone through a lot with her last relationships...the last thing she needs is to enter in another "cheating relationship"...

everyday, I just wish more and more for a girl, or for anyone or anything to show up and do something to him that will crush his ego...and I mean crush it and break it in over 1 million pieces...

I really dont know what to do...pls help me with this...what should I do about this situation???


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## Monte (Feb 17, 2010)

Stop being "friends" with someone you hate?


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## OctoberSkye (Jun 3, 2010)

Pretend he doesn't exist. Warn your best friend about him. Breathe.


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## Molock (Mar 10, 2010)

I fucking hate that kind of person. I wish I knew him so that I could... humble him :angry:
My advice is to have a good talk with that girl. Don't allow her to waste her time and energy with a jerk like him. Also, you have to stop seeing him. Clearly he is not a friend of yours. I don't know why you endure his crap.


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## Nitou (Feb 3, 2010)

Maybe he has penis envy.


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## DasPhillipBrau (Apr 2, 2010)

sorry but I didnt mentioned this:
the guy is in my class, so "stop seeing him" is impossible, I will see him for the rest of this year and the next one, so becoming enemies is not a really good idea.
secondly: my infj heart wont really allow me to say something like "hey fuck off I dont want to see you again"

third: there is a little bit, only a little bit of good values in him...


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## OctoberSkye (Jun 3, 2010)

Not seeing him is impossible, but not acknowledging him is. The only power people have over us is what we give them. I see some very black and white thinking. You don't have to be enemies or friends. And there's a wide gap between, "Hey, buddy," and "Fuck off." I also understand wanting to see the good in people, even those with overwhelming negative traits.
Is this high school (or whatever equivalent) you are talking about? Because, I can't even tell you who was in my classes back then. And it wasn't really that long ago. The point is, you don't want to spend those years bothering yourself with what that guy thinks and does. There's no easy solution on how to deal with someone like that, that you have to tolerate, but you're allowing him to get to you unnecessarily. You don't have to hang out with him outside of school if you don't want to. And when you do, try to tune him out.


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## Scruffy (Aug 17, 2009)

If you're going to de-friend him, and want to do it in a subtle way try making yourself really unappealing to hang out with.

Be a person you know he will find irritating, and pretend. 

It sucks to have to do it, but this will make it easier on you.


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## DasPhillipBrau (Apr 2, 2010)

OctoberSkye said:


> Not seeing him is impossible, but not acknowledging him is. The only power people have over us is what we give them. I see some very black and white thinking. You don't have to be enemies or friends. And there's a wide gap between, "Hey, buddy," and "Fuck off." I also understand wanting to see the good in people, even those with overwhelming negative traits.
> Is this high school (or whatever equivalent) you are talking about? Because, I can't even tell you who was in my classes back then. And it wasn't really that long ago. The point is, you don't want to spend those years bothering yourself with what that guy thinks and does. There's no easy solution on how to deal with someone like that, that you have to tolerate, but you're allowing him to get to you unnecessarily. You don't have to hang out with him outside of school if you don't want to. And when you do, try to tune him out.


ignoring him would mean ignoring the rest of my friends, as we all hang in a single group :S and yeah when we hang out I really try to ignore him.



Scruffy said:


> If you're going to de-friend him, and want to do it in a subtle way try making yourself really unappealing to hang out with.
> 
> Be a person you know he will find irritating, and pretend.
> 
> It sucks to have to do it, but this will make it easier on you.



that cant be done...I've been friends with these guys since im on 8th grade...I cant just break a 2 years friendship, not while im still in highschool at the same class the guy is...and I cant turn "irritating" either, sure I can but 
A: I wont be irritating enough for him
B: that would mean becoming irritating to the rest of friend circle
C: I could actually make the guy get really angry, and that would turn into something very violent, like literally violent


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## Labyrinth (Jun 28, 2010)

Ok, I have been sitting here thinking of what to write to you, I feel for you, and I had this nice long paragraph and then I did something (don't know what) and it was all erased, so I will condense it to this:

You remind me of a good friend of mine, she is totally the opposite of your friend, caring , loving, giving everything to everyone and then some...all of this is good and not so good, in fact it can be really bad, why? because people take advantage of her most if not all the time and all I can do is be supportive and try to encourage her to stand up for herself. So I am going to tell you what I have told her several times and will continue to tell her ... YOU COME FIRST!!! If people are not being nice to you and I hate to tell you this but if this is the kind of friends you have or people you consider your friends, i do not want to meet people that you do not consider your friends. If they are harming you and yes he is because just look at how you get by simply thinking of him or having him pop up on MSN, this is toxic to you, you are foaming at the mouth and he is calm as he can be. 



Lightleggy said:


> sorry but I didnt mentioned this:
> the guy is in my class, so "stop seeing him" is impossible, I will see him for the rest of this year and the next one, so becoming enemies is not a really good idea.
> secondly: my infj heart wont really allow me to say something like "hey fuck off I dont want to see you again"
> 
> third: there is a little bit, only a little bit of good values in him...


The same I tell her, STOP PLAYING THE VICTIM ROLE HERE! I do not know much about INJF's but please don't tell me that your heart does not allow you to do this when you just said all those things about him behind his back! Now the thing is to say it to his face, so is not that you can not do it, you are choosing to not do it. And yes I tell her this, I am sorry if it sound "too rough", but the truth hurts and you know what if it helps him then by all means, tell him the truth!!! who said anything about making him your enemy? you can be friendly with him, but you do not have to be his friend. And in regards to your female friend, you can not save everyone else without saving yourself first. I think she is attractive to him because as you mentioned above, "he does have a little bit of good values in him..." and he sees you still hanging around with him too so why wouldn't she want to consider him. 

I am going to stop because I admit just like with my friend is upsetting for me to hear when someone is being abuse/ or mistreated and choose to not do anything in front of that person but surely say it behind their back. Is confusing to me, and plus I am wondering if you are in some way jealous? afraid of him? is he a bully to you? I mean all of those have to be considered but I am sure that there are people just like here that would be more than willing to help. And yes this was the condensed version of what i had written before, pls don't misunderstand me, I do believe you have what it takes and you are ( I hope) better than that guy....:frustrating:


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## DasPhillipBrau (Apr 2, 2010)

Labyrinth said:


> Ok, I have been sitting here thinking of what to write to you, I feel for you, and I had this nice long paragraph and then I did something (don't know what) and it was all erased, so I will condense it to this:
> 
> You remind me of a good friend of mine, she is totally the opposite of your friend, caring , loving, giving everything to everyone and then some...all of this is good and not so good, in fact it can be really bad, why? because people take advantage of her most if not all the time and all I can do is be supportive and try to encourage her to stand up for herself. So I am going to tell you what I have told her several times and will continue to tell her ... YOU COME FIRST!!! If people are not being nice to you and I hate to tell you this but if this is the kind of friends you have or people you consider your friends, i do not want to meet people that you do not consider your friends. If they are harming you and yes he is because just look at how you get by simply thinking of him or having him pop up on MSN, this is toxic to you, you are foaming at the mouth and he is calm as he can be.
> 
> ...


well...as for me...it results almost impossible to hate people or even to "get away from them" 
I know that a lot of people will try to take advantage of you if you are too nice...they have done that with me...a lot of times...and I hate it, but still, seeing that im really better than all those people makes up for it...this really reminds me something that Jesus said
"Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing"
and I guess I could think the same...they really dont know what they are doing.
and the reason why my friend likes him is because he is very hypocrit with girls, he has "several faces" for them and he uses the "you are the reason of my existance" strategy (where the guy tells the girls that he really loves them and that they are the first girls he ever fell that for, bla bla bla) not because of the "good values" im talking about...

I dont know if its envy...I dont think so, as I could not envy someone with his traits...but I do have this...great desire to see his ego crushed.
even after that happens, im still planning to help him get up (if his ego does suffers a major hit) even after talking behind his back (I had a huge weight I had to get off from me...) I still wont deny him my friendship.
he is the only friend who acts like this...all my other friends are very caring and compressive, and yeah he is kind of a psychological bully.

also, I dont want to tell him this things in the face, no matter the tone you use with him, the guy is very moody when someone tells him something against him, and he would take this as an insult and would probably even try to hit me (and im avoiding conflict at all cost) 

but thanks for your help...really


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## Conscience (Mar 9, 2010)

With people like this, you need to not get rid of him. Instead, repel him, or block him out by finding new friends. You can do it. If you're mad enuff and sick enough of this guy, you'll make it happen. Surround yourself with people who really care, and don't make you have high blood-pressure. Don't waste your time being flustered and furious about an ugly, disgusting, pig-head, disrespectful, vulgar, cling-machine idiot, because he's worth nothing, and he shouldn't take up half of your mind space.



Now go, and show him that you've had ENUFF!


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## Jojo (Jul 5, 2010)

This sounds like the beginning of someone becoming your Arch-nemesis. I don't even know how you can call this person a friend. Acquaintance sure. I guess I am going to recommend you watch the movie Kick-Ass that might make you feel better.


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## KiloBravo (Aug 2, 2010)

I had a friend like yours many years ago, as a matter of fact we were really good friends until he changed. He turned into a racist and got super obnoxious. He also pulled many of the same stunts the original poster's asshat friend did. In the end you have to cut them, thats all there is to it. You will feel better after you tell him to kick rocks. If you have the gut feeling the guy is a tool, you should listen to it. People like this usually don't change if you tolerate them. If you tell him what you think about him, you may just be doing him a service and adjust his attitude in the process.


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## Miss Scarlet (Jul 26, 2010)

Why are you friends with someone you hate. That doesn't make any sense!


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## Gaminegirlie (Jul 31, 2010)

Hate....Friend

How is this possible?
Pleeeeeeaaase, 
i thought INFJs were good at hacking away weeds.
I'm sorry but the issue lies with you.


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## rebornintheglory (Mar 22, 2010)

Keep getting mad at him until one day you explode. Punch him several times before he knows what is going on. You will only get one chance, so make sure it is in front of people and isn't over something petty. After this I don't really have any advice, as bad things will probably happen to you. You will feel better though!


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## dobsonianfx (Aug 5, 2010)

Don't worry. He'll get his just deserts. His kind always do.


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## summersoccer14 (Jul 2, 2010)

Well, i wouldn't try to pay much attention to him.. just agree with it when he insults you and just be like "ya, you're cool"
But then.. also stick up to him.. tell him straight up he's being low, he might talk back and stuff.. but at least he knows deep down. Let him think he's all cool, cause i'm pretty sure alot of other people see it too.

For your friend.. she has the right to choose her own choices but.. just support her. Warn her about his evilness but let her learn...make mistakes. as painful it is to watch. just be there for her if she gets crushed??

Also.. try to look at his better quilties, even though it seems like only a few. I'm pretty sure there is good in him scratching to get out.. but noone i'm sure never really showed him. and he probably deep down feel horrible about himself so points out others flaws to make him feel better. He probably doesn't have the best role models either..

He doesn't need to be your friend btw. don't be mean to him.. just don't show interest?


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## Kuja (Oct 16, 2009)

People have to stand up to him, he has to learn he can't act like that with others. Losing (many) friends might make him realise that. Standing up to him might be hard, but remember what a douche bag you're dealing with, you have every right to be harsh and blunt. Not enough if only one does it though. Oh what a dream world I live in...

Hopefully he just matures  
But anyway, if losing him as a friend is your mission and you can't do what Scruffy suggested you might want to force yourself to be blunt with him, you simply do not want to be "friends" with him anymore, cut him out. Might not feel very good but you'll be glad you did it later on, not like you can hurt his ego anyway right? He really should learn he can't act that way and losing friends will hopefully make him realise eventually.

Sorry if I missed something or I'm just repeating stuff, I'm tired


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## DasPhillipBrau (Apr 2, 2010)

Well guys.
Im just here to inform you of the situation,* thank you ALL for EVERY advice you provided*

my best friend and this guys are now a couple...I can see that the guy probably does feel something better for this girl than the last one, not saying that its all cool because he always get bored of his girlfriends eventaully, but who knows, he could change.

well, me and my other friends (Who are also his friends) have decided that we will not tolerate that he cheats on this girl...at the first ATTEMPT to cheat on her, we WILL tell her inmediatly that the guy is trying to cheat on her.

also, one of my friends is like a brother to the guy, so he can say almost anything without pissing him off...and if he gets pissed off, well he is the only one phisically capable of defending against him 
well the guy said that he will tak to him, and that he will convince him to not be such a huge d bag...

I hope that things get better, thanks guys!


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## Rachel25Lee (Jun 18, 2010)

Lightleggy said:


> Im so fucking sick of this guy, so fucking sick of his huge ego, his lack of respect for girls, his incredible stupidity and awful-always wrong stubborness...
> 
> ok first of all...what can I tell you about him...well this guy thinks that he is the complete absolute shit and he thinks that everyone else are crap...the worst part is that he actually let them know what he thinks...he is always criticizing you or everyone else, always looking for new ways to make you feel like shit (he just logged on in MSN and I almost hit the screen just with seeing his damm picture)
> he has a huge ego, he thinks he can do whatever he wants, he also brags a lot because he is "american" but its all bullshit...his father is american and his mother is not) so he is constantly bragging about how "americans are better at everything...oh is that american? then its great! not like the crap that they do in this country, or in that one...oh that seems like a nice country to me...but there is a problem, its NOT AMERICA!!!"
> ...



LOL Wowzers, why are you so worked up?? First of all, honestly, nothing ever helps with you getting worked up. No, I'm not trying to be the sofy feeling type, I mean he'll just become more intent on acting his idiotic way if he sees you puffing up all the time. LOL Act blase`; it irritates a-holes if you act like you don't care, 'cause if they don't get any attention from their actions they won't do it as much, especially if everyone's like, "O, yeah, that's nice..." then turns away. Of course he'll boost up his actions, but when that doesn't help, he'll either do something really stupid and be thrown in jail or he'll calm down and you would then try explaining things, in your point of view, to him.

Hehe, the bragging about being american reminds me of the YuGiOh Abridged serise... you know that dude who's always like, "... In America!!!" Yeah...

Anyhoozle, you're saying that you're "right"... first of all, who the hell says either of you are "right"?? Honestly and truely. I mean, I don't even bother segrigating right and wrong any more, 'cause people always change it, so whatever. I mean, for example, you hate him (and several other people probably do too) because you call him "wrong", well, I like the sound of this stubborn git. LOL depending on the person and what they do, I like them. In this case, I like your "friend". LOL Not dissing you or calling you "wrong" (I don't think either of you to be right or wrong) or whatever, just that I like the sound of this morron.

Anyhoozle anyhoozle... I relate to your problems with his girl thing. There's this dude dating a girl friend of mine (girl SPACE friend; I don't date, but that's currently irrelevant to the subject...) and he's an a-hole and a morron (a real airhead). The best part about their relationship is that he dated another friend of mine and he cheated on her with her best friend (the girl he's dating now). The girl he's dating right now knows he's an idiot (me and everyone [and I mean EVERYONE; litterally]) told her so several times) and we've told her all the horrid stories about him, but, no; that all left her unphased and she's as devoted as ever to this jerk. Well, o well. LOL I personal don't care; her choices, yadda yadda yadda, blah blah blah. Well either she figures it out and dumps him or they get married and she's miserable for the rest of her life (I'm hoping for the later 'cause I crave chaos). My point of this lame story being that the girls will do as they shall, and (were I into guys [or anybody, for that matte]) I will say that's an admirable trait for a guy such as yourself to have. Kudos for you (or however you spell that).

Okay, you wanna know the only thing you can do in this situation? First of all, adults are sooooo out of the question... they litterally do nothing (and I ain't saying that 'cause I hate 'em; I love teachers and whatnot), but that's obviously out... But, if you're so determined and passionate about this, there's a few things you could do...

(A) You could get as many people (victems) together as possible and tell them to ignore him. Yeah, it's hard to get an insainly large group of loyal people together to do this, but it works. If no body's listening to him, if nobody cares, he'll either (like I said) do some stupid, reckless thing or just go emo. Either way would be fun to watch.

(B) If he steals a girl from you again, you go up to them when they're making out or whatever and tell him you don't want him to hurt her emotionally or whatever (practice a large speech if you care), and make sure he hits you first if there's a fist fight, 'cause then the girl and witnesses can say you're only protecting yourself and the girl. XD Awww! ( ;D ) You like the girl so much, do something about it and show the ignorant half of the speicies (namely girls; weak, pathetic things) that you care more.

(C) Get nasty. Hehehe. Pop his car tires (or fourwheeler or whatever), put dirt in his drink (or worse), egg his house at night, you get the picture. Get creative, but make sure he doesn't catch you, 'cause he sounds like a beast and he'll probably hunt you down and kill you. XD

If you are gonna confront him, do so truthfully. I don't care how nasty he gets; if there's witnesses (and 95% of the time there are) you need to be out of the clear and say you were trying to protect someone. Anyhoozle, that's all I'm inputing right now. Good luck, homie.


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