# How many of you have resentful parents?



## shivasoul (May 6, 2012)

All jokes about the meme aside, I'm really curious how many of us have parents (in my case, my mother) who resent us and treat us fairly or poorly. Anyone?


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## Coyote (Jan 24, 2012)

My mom told me that I ruined her life and she should've had an abortion. I think there was a lot of resentment, especially when I became a rebellious teenager and she no longer saw the value in her "sacrifice." We had a lot of problems.

How does your mom show her resentment?

I don't know how old you are, but if it helps, just know that things might get better in the future. I'm 28 now, and my mom and I are finally on pretty good terms. (She even commented on it, with surprise in her voice.) Adulthood tends to change the parent-child relationship, so there's still hope if you're young.


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## StElmosDream (May 26, 2012)

No experience with parents like this, instead grandparents were like this. They often conveyed that 'children should be seen and not heard' attitude expressing dislike of having non adults around them and treated me like a lesser being, as if I had nothing to contribute or they knew more than I did (my mother was raised the same way, alongside 3 other siblings who did not resolve their issues before child birth themselves). Then appearing resentful, when I had enough of being treated like this (I broke all contact) as if I owed their generation something for stoic war time behaviour and dispassionate family raising.


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## Wormwood (Feb 24, 2012)

My mother has borderline personality disorder, so I never know what she thinks of me at any given time. Idk if that counts. Also, I had the fortunate opportunity of separating from her, so I suppose I don't have much reason to post here.

I find solace in knowing that the resentful people in my life are generally delusional and neurotic. Perhaps you could too, if your situation is similar.


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## GROUNDED_ONE (May 23, 2012)

Mine lives to point out every obvious negative to any situation I tell her about

Disclaimer: I am a giant pain in the ass..so it balances well


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## Alaiyo Sakuri (Jan 1, 2009)

I think my mother thinks I break everything I touch, so she thinks I purposely waste her money, which is really important to her since she grew up poor. I am kind of careless and selfish, so I'll be workin' on that.


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## Curiously (Nov 7, 2011)

Growing up, I suspected my mom harbored some resentment towards me as I was an unplanned child and she got pregnant with me when she and my dad were starting out as a fairly new and relatively young couple. She decided to keep me. In true first immigrant fashion, my parents got serious, soon got married, and started working non-stop in preparation for my birth. While I think it's part of my mom's nature to be a very responsible, selfless, and devoted person, I think she had to sacrifice much of her youth and freedom by keeping me. My parents never had a proper honeymoon because of money constraints. 

Back-to-school shopping was never really a pleasant experience for me because my mom made me feel as though that was a chore and something that took money away from the family's bank account. I always hesitated to go for the school supplies and clothes that I wanted because my mom is frugal and tends not to pay for premium things. I guess I ended up with a guilt complex for my very existence because, like I said, I was the unplanned child and because of me, my parents had to buckle down and let go of their personal freedoms to raise me with stability.

It took many years for me to get to a point where I don't believe my mom resents me. I know she loves me more than I can ever imagine. Her love is true. But I'd be a liar if I said a deep part of me hasn't been hurt and affected from growing up with such a belief. Maybe this helps to explain why I don't want to be a mom as I don't want to end up harboring resentment towards my child for a self-perceived sense of freedom lost.


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## Anemone (Apr 26, 2012)

Hmm... Well, my parents always have something negative or critical about everything I say or do. This has become a daily occurrance and results in me feeling very hurt while my parents laugh- even when they see how hurt or serious I am about something. I don't know if this counts as resentful, but I feel like they don't want to talk to me or hear anything I have to say. But when someone else says the same thing I say, they are praised and it really annoys me... So, I had to let this out somewhere before I burst into tears the next time my mom insinuates something mean about me


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