# Girls' personality - fathers' mothers; boys' personality - mothers' fathers?



## Sparky (Mar 15, 2010)

I have a theory that in terms of personality, girls are more similar to their fathers' mothers, while boys are more similar to their mothers' fathers. This comes from personal experience observing people. 

If you are male, is your personality more similar to your mother's father? 

If you are female, is your personality more similar to your father's mother? 

What do you guys think? Thank you.


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## Thief Noctis (Jan 6, 2012)

... I'm female but I don't think I'm like my Dad's Mother. If I had to choose I'd say I was more similar to my Mum's Mother.
But that's only based on how well I know them, and probably biased because I'm closest to her out of all my grandparents (including step, I have 6 sets of them currently). So I know her better than the rest of them and can't really make a definite judgement. Would be best to ask someone who knows me and my family, but obviously you can't do that.

So like I said, I'd go with Mum's Mother.


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## Dragearen (Feb 2, 2012)

I am nothing at all like my mother's father. He is bold, outspoken, very traditional, prone to a bit of a temper, and somewhat controlling. Still lovable though... Usually. I am, however, extremely similar to my father, one of my brothers, and my father's father. To the point where I have wondered if my father's father was a past life.


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## ptarmigan (Jul 19, 2010)

My mother's father is reclusive, not very social or at least very cautious or inhibited, but kind and happy to see people. He is very difficult to carry a conversation with except on topics of his experience and knowledge.

In that sense at least, I bear some resemblance to him.

He is also somewhat authoritarian, very set in his ways, spends much of his time and attention following televised sports, is rather dependent on women to do what he thinks is women's work, and is somatically distant or poorly receptive to touch.

I am none of this. And yet, just that inhibiting introversion alone makes me feel so very similar to him.


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## CaptSwan (Mar 31, 2013)

I'm a male and I'm nothing like my mother's father. Way, way, way different. I think you need to refine your theory a little bit more.


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## dragthewaters (Feb 9, 2013)

I am a 6w7 INFP. I didn't have much of a relationship with my father's mother, but from what I know about her she was nothing like me. My best guess as to her personality type is Enneagram 1 or 2 ISFJ. The things that I do know about her is that she really liked animals and had a bunch of pen pals that became very close to her and some even saw her as a mother figure. However, she was a very judgmental person, rude to anyone who did not fit into her notion of how people should be (ie. my mom, which is why I never had a relationship with my father's mother). She spoiled and overprotected my dad, who was her only child, which led to a lot of his personality issues later in life (he is passive-aggressive and a pathological liar and victim). She also hid from him the fact that his dad, who abandoned her when my dad was 3, had had some kind of schizophrenic-like disorder until very late in life.

My brother is an 8w7 ESTJ and my mother's father was a 9w8 and probably ISTJ, possibly ISTP. They don't have all that many similarities either. My grandpa was the stoic type, he worked as a firefighter for most of his career, he was somewhat strict and old-fashioned for his era in raising my mom/uncle, and he did have a bit of a temper sometimes but it was one of those quietly burning kind of tempers (you know, classic 9w8). My brother is kind of whiny, ranty, and overbearing, and his temper is a lot more explosively violent (you know, classic 8w7). Also my brother dropped out of high school, was unemployed for 2 1/2 years due to anxiety, and blames my parents and society for everything wrong with his life. My grandpa would never do anything like that -- he was the first in his family to graduate high school and always worked very hard even in the face of adversity, without complaining. My brother and grandpa did have similar Si-influenced hoarding/obsession with the past tendencies.

The only person in my family who I feel somewhat similar to personality wise is my 5w4 INTJ mom. My family is pretty small but I'm the only NF in my family, at least as far as my typing goes.

On what basis did you come up with this theory?


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## LadyO.W.BernieBro (Sep 4, 2010)

well, all l would really have to do is think of all my male maternal cousins. Not very likely that all male cousins on one side of the family are going to be overwhelmingly similar for anyone. l kind of cheated, but in my family it just so happens that all the women had at least one boy.

l DO notice the older ones being similar to my grandfather.

l'm kinda sorta like my paternal grandmother, l guess? She was an odd duck lol.


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## Aidan (Dec 21, 2012)

He's an intp. So, I guess? We're both nt's, but none of our functions match.


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## earthtopaige (May 12, 2013)

I don't really think so. Both my sister and I are complete opposites and even then, neither of us relate to our grandmother very much.


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## Dewymorning (Nov 24, 2012)

Compared to whom?

I am an INFJ, my mother is an INFJ, and my father's mother was an ENFJ.

Maybe my Daddy just married someone who kind of reminded him of his mummy. 


I also think my father's father is a type 9w1, which is my enneagram type.


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## Jennywocky (Aug 7, 2009)

For my own life, out of four grandparents, I happen by accident to be like my father's mom, although I probably spent the least amount of time with her than any of my grandparents -- she died when I was 8 or so.

Mom's dad: ESTJ
Mom's mom: ISFJ
Dad's dad: ISTJ
Dad's mom: IxFP

But I think in general it's a bad theory because there isn't even a mechanism that we're aware of genetically that would explain such a pattern, nor does MBTI type seem to be genetic. I voted for "Theory needs more evidence" -- a HECK of a lot more.


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## StaceofBass (Jul 1, 2012)

I have never met my paternal grandmother. She passed away when my dad was 7 years old of a brain aneurysm. I can only go by stories from my relatives' memories of her and I can see _some_ similarities, but all in all I think my personality is very different from my family.


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## hailfire (Dec 16, 2012)

Dear God no, I'm nothing like that woman when she was still alive. Neither are my sisters by quite a longshot, but my youngest sister might be the closest it gets. I never knew my maternal grandfather, so I can't comment on that one in regards to my brother.

And LOL at the "no" option.


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## Moss Icon (Mar 29, 2011)

Nope. My maternal grandfather and I are very different. I am more like my paternal grandfather, if anyone.


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## sisnerozt (Mar 11, 2013)

female and I take after my dad very much so


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## Quork (Aug 17, 2012)

I've met my paternal grandmother once and I thoroughly disliked her. She reminded me of a worse version of my mother. Something to note is my paternal grandmother, my maternal grandmother, and mother seem to have the same personality, bothersome (well _they _are) ESFJs who don't mesh well with me.


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## Pixzelina (May 25, 2013)

No. 

I'm more like my father's father. My grandma was really caring about her grandkids, always letting us spend nights at her house (no matter how much my cousins and I misbehaved sometimes she would always allow us to come back). Driving across town just to deliver little halloween goodie bags. She was always doing things for family. Was very active and kept busy with family and errands, etc..

My grandpa on the other hand sat in the kitchen all day drinking beer and smoking cigarettes. He never did anything with the grand kids, and was very sarcastic.. and loved to annoy the shit out of my cousins, siblings and I (especially my younger cousin). He could tell if you moved anything a centimeter in his room (literally it was like he took a picture and surveyed it carefully every time he entered his room). You could tell that deep down he cared big time but he didn't show any heartfelt emotion around anyone. He was tonnes of fun to mess with as a kid. :tongue:

I think I'm more like my grandpa in that I'm really sarcastic and playful towards people, don't show much emotion but care deep down. I'm not the type to bend over backwards like my grandma did for everyone.. plus my grandma didn't have much of a sense of humor for the stuff I pulled with my cousins...

I think my grandma was an ESFJ and my grandpa was an ISTJ.


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## IDontThinkSo (Aug 24, 2011)

I'm more similar to my father's father's sister.


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## B00Bz (Jul 11, 2013)

I've been told I look like her when she was young more than I act like her. I'm more extroverted than almost all my family.


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## Sparky (Mar 15, 2010)

Although not so much about personality, I have found online that explains how intelligence is linked to the X-chromosome. Since boys receive their X-chromosome from their mother, and one of their mothers X-chromosome comes from her father, the mother's father has somewhat of an influence on her boy. This might also explain common personality traits, or similar demeanor, shared between the mother's father, and the mother's son. On the other hand, girls receive their X-chromosome from the father, and the father's X-chromosome comes from his mother, so the father's mother has an influence on the father's daughter.

There are possibly two explanations for similarities in demeanor between father's mother, and father's daughter, or mother's father and mother's son:

1. When the father recognizes the similarity of his daughter to his mother, he will become more protective and therefore, more likely to help raise the child. Similarly, when the mother sees her son's similarity with her father, she will be more caring for him. This also provides the child with another role model, so the boy has a father as a male figure, as well as his mother's father. The girl will have her mother, as well as her father's mother to look after her. These qualities help ensure a better growing environment for the child.

2. Similarities, and not incompatibilities, between parents and children reduce the likelihood of incest. Incestuous relationship is seen as evolutionarily disadvantageous, because marriage between different families ensures a larger support system, whereas incest produces a smaller support network. If the boy reminds the mother of her father, and the girl reminds the father of his mother, then there is less likelihood of a sexual relationship between mother-son, or father-daughter; just like it is extremely rare (possibly nonexistent) to find an ENTP mother with her biological, INFJ son, an ENFP father with his biological, INTJ daughter, or a parent-child relationship of other compatibility types. 

Do girls take after their fathers mother? - Yahoo! Answers
Does anyone know whether a young boys intelligence comes from his fathers DNA or his mothers DNA? | Answerbag
Brainy sons owe intelligence to their mothers - News - The Independent
Genes for intelligence on the X chromosome.


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## knittigan (Sep 2, 2011)

I don't think this is terribly scientific, but I do happen to be extraordinarily similar to my paternal grandmother.


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## Mademoiselle Wonderland (Jul 22, 2013)

Erm, I don't really relate to any of my grandmothers. But I'm an INFJ, so... *twirls toe in carpet awkwardly* 

However, I do observe that my brother is like my mom's dad (maternal grandfather). And my sister is indeed like my father's mother. 
I have multiple siblings, but not all of them take after your options. Perhaps, if there is more than one sibling, only one child takes on characteristics of predecessors? Or maybe even it goes even further back according to birth order? 

Quite an interesting theory! Thanks!


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## outofplace (Dec 19, 2012)

I never really knew my father's mother. She died when I was 7 but the earliest memories that I do have about her is that she was a very cold, emotionless woman. My father has Narcississtic Personality Disorder (malignant) so I wouldn't be surprised if she had it, too.

So to answer your question, No, I am nothing like his mother.

As for my brother, he is nothing like my mother's father because my grandfather was a ladies' man and a charmer whereas my brother is very much a "momma's boy" and never had a girlfriend in his life.


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## PandaBear (Jul 2, 2013)

I totally agree! I said this in another thread but we're literally twins (if she was 70+ years younger) In general, I look like I "belong" on my dad's side more than my mom's side so I don't know if that rule applies to everyone.


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## Mind Swirl (Sep 7, 2011)

No, this doesn't hold true for me at all. However, I *physically* look more like my dad's side of the family while my brother tends to *physically* look like my mom's side of the family, facially and in terms of body type.


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## Sparky (Mar 15, 2010)

Another interesting article:
X-Cloned Brains: Is this the secret of fathers and daughters? | Psychology Today

It is also interesting to note that Kate Middleton's son bears a certain resemblance to Kate's father (Michael Middleton), who might be INTJ. 























The Middleton family is very interesting, and here are my guesses for their personality types:

Michael Middleton (father) - INTJ
Carole Goldsmith (mother) - ENFP
Kate Middleton (daughter) - INTJ
Pippa Middleton (daughter) - ESTJ
James Middleton (son) - INTJ

I find it highly unusual for an ENFP mother to have an INTJ son, though entirely possible.


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## nádej (Feb 27, 2011)

Mind Swirl said:


> No, this doesn't hold true for me at all. However, I *physically* look more like my dad's side of the family while my brother tends to *physically* look like my mom's side of the family, facially and in terms of body type.


This for me too. Physically my brother looks exactly like my mom's side of the family (and, interestingly, all of the males on my mom's side of the family look kind of appallingly similar while the females are more of a mixed bag)...my dad's side of the family is really small, so there's not much to compare to, but I'm guessing most of my physical appearance comes from there, since it certainly doesn't come from my mom's side. I'm nothing like my paternal grandmother (and actually from what I hear I share a lot of similarities with my maternal grandfather, who died when I was four months old) though.


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## Accidie (Jul 11, 2013)

I am nothing like my dad's mom. She is an ISFJ 2 who drives me insane even though she is the most loving, self-sacrificing person I know. She'll cook you breakfast, lunch, and dinner, wash and iron all your clothes, pay for your car insurance, and then make you feel like you're 2-inches tall.

Feature-wise, I do take after my dad's side, though. You can't even tell my mom and I are related.


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## Echoe (Apr 23, 2012)

I would type my paternal grandmother as a 1w2 ISFJ, and I'm a 9w1 INTP. I think my dad is a 9w8 ISTP, though, and we're more alike with quite a few personality similarities. I would type my mother as 6w7 ESFJ, and yeah, we're pretty different.


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## He's a Superhero! (May 1, 2013)

I know in my case that this theory is incorrect.


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## RaidenPrime (Aug 4, 2012)

I disagree. I think we tend to mimic which parent is the most successful at life (which parent makes the most money and is the most stable). That is, unless life is handed to us on a silver platter and we don't have to really worry about personal success.


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## DiamondDays (Sep 4, 2012)

No. As much as i liked my mothers father i am not much like him. Though i am pretty much a carbon copy of my father, and him of his father.


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## GloriousUprightSnail (Jul 29, 2013)

I'm quite like my father's mother. She was open minded, gentle, friendly, protected her family and friends. 
I'm definitely more outgoing than she is though, and a lot messier :tongue:


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## Devrim (Jan 26, 2013)

I might be slightly more like my grandfather,
But my sister is nothing like my one grandmother!

It'd be better too see what parent the child takes on more characteristics from


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## Psychopomp (Oct 3, 2012)

Sparky said:


> I have a theory that in terms of personality, girls are more similar to their fathers' mothers, while boys are more similar to their mothers' fathers. This comes from personal experience observing people.
> 
> If you are male, is your personality more similar to your mother's father?
> 
> ...


I could not be more unlike my mother's father. He is a fundamentally social person who fills his life with endless minutia and self-aggrandizing banality. He is rude without thinking, he is ideologically certain without even beginning to grasp the essence of the matter.

Regardless, he and I share only that we are both ostensibly focused on logic. But, it is logic of a whole different sort doing a whole different thing for wholly different reasons. 

I definitely do not fit this theory.


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## zinnia (Jul 22, 2013)

Not in my case. Maybe it depends on experiences growing up. I found my father's mother to be overly judgmental, harsh, and emotionally manipulative/abusive.

My brother also is nothing like my mother's father. My grandfather was a hard worker and always had his mind on a goal; my brother is generally lazy unless he is forced to do something.


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## Thalassa (Jun 10, 2010)

My mom says when I wear my hair up and glasses (which has been a lot since my late 20s, I have really long hair, and I'm more comfortable in my glasses) I look a lot like my dad's mom. She said I have her sense of "poise" too, and my father's parents were hippies, they were very liberal Silents, much more so than my mother's parents. I was actually raised by my mother and my mother's parents, and I also see that I have traits of my mother, my grandfather, and even my grandfather's wife whom I am not genetically related to.


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## Fleetfoot (May 9, 2011)

This doesn't make any sense. Families are known to consist of very different types of people in terms of skills, personalities, etc. Even with siblings they are rarely ever the same as another. 

The only grandparent I have left is my father's mother. We have very little in common except the fact that we're both extroverted.


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## CrystallineSheep (Jul 8, 2012)

God.....I hope not. :laughing: My father's mother is a narcissist and has a lot of personality issues. I would like to think I am not like that at all.


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## Cappuccino (Aug 14, 2012)

I'm a female INFP and my father's mother is ESFJ. We're nothing alike, not even looks. 
I take after my mom and most closely relate to my aunt, her oldest sister. I wouldn't know which grandparent because there aren't any living on that side..


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