# I need some help.



## iNdependent (Jan 12, 2017)

SpaceTimeFormula said:


> I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m either a 3 INTJ or a 5 ENTJ.


I had some links to Enn descriptions saved in a word doc:
http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...e-beliefs-3s-according-beatrice-chestnut.html
http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...ation-threes-according-beatrice-chestnut.html
http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...exual-threes-according-beatrice-chestnut.html
http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...001-social-3-according-beatrice-chestnut.html

http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...e-beliefs-5s-according-beatrice-chestnut.html
http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...according-beatrice-chestnut.html#post24110426
http://www.personalitycafe.com/head...sexual-fives-according-beatrice-chestnut.html
http://www.personalitycafe.com/head...social-fives-according-beatrice-chestnut.html

On other sites:
https://www.enneagram.net/types.html
Enneagram Central
Typewatch Enneagram: Typewatch Enneagram Type Descriptions
https://theenneagramatwork.com/instinctual-subtypes/

Youtube Enn channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/jennywawa88/videos 



> What does “being more human” mean? To use personal experience to better understand where people come from? To relate to them easier? To understand how they feel intuitively? I don’t know.


If you are referring to what I wrote about Si doms/auxes being more "human" than Ni doms/auxes, it's about the ease with which Si users observe and adopt "normal" human behaviour. For them it's more or less without effort, they are attuned to the present moment and notice all sort of details, including details of "how one should be" that escape NJs - Ns in general, actually, making them be perceived as "aliens" in many cases.



> I’ve noticed that it’s easier to control sensing behaviors (e.g. I can adapt to change rather easily) than feeling behaviors. Those I tend to either constrain or repress entirely. I don’t open up to people readily; when I do, it feels cloudy, like I’m not sure what to say or how to say it.


 This sounds like Fi is your inferior, not Se. 

That is how I became almost sure I'm an INTJ: Te doesn't react as my inf, but Se; that seems to be my ambivalent relation, easily turning into excess in both directions - overindulging or suppressing too much. Chronologically also, by functions' development order: in childhood & puberty I was in a N haze, then in my teens a rise of Te, up to over reliance on it (which often happens when one starts developing a function). Then problems started in my life and it affected my mental functioning too, but that also fits better with the description of Se grip than with any INFP kind of malfunctioning I've read about.

MBTI type depends on the functions you use; context (including Enn) is important to take into account in order to be subtracted from your general vibe, the type you seem to be, which sometimes isn't the one you are. I probably come off as an INFJ to people who know me little, to friends I certainly come off as an INFP (my best friend typed me as such, but her knowledge of functions was somewhat limited at the time) because I clearly use Fi.

I still have some doubts because I've been dysfunctional for long enough to doubt I see myself accurately and because I fit NF a better than NT - but the latter is explainable by Enn 4w5 and by the people I've been associating myself with since childhood (mostly NFs) - entourage and the people you look up to also influence. I decided to wait until I go over function theory one more time and have a discussion with my friend too before I settle on a type, but signs seem to point to Ni Te Fi as my general way of thinking/making decisions and Ni-Se as my desired, best self -vs.- repulsive, worst fear line, so INTJ in spite of my xNFP sense of humour and INFJ by dichotomies.

Another way of figuring out is hanging out on the forums of INTJs and ENTJs; probably some of the members are mistyped, but there's still a majority by which you can get a "feel" if that's the same way you're thinking and the same issues that preoccupy you.


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## SpaceTimeFormula (Apr 21, 2018)

iNdependent said:


> I had some links to Enn descriptions saved in a word doc:
> http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...e-beliefs-3s-according-beatrice-chestnut.html
> http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...ation-threes-according-beatrice-chestnut.html
> http://www.personalitycafe.com/type...exual-threes-according-beatrice-chestnut.html
> ...


Thanks for the links. It's hard for me to pick out which description I relate to most specifically, but I relate to 3 sp, 5 sp, and 5 so. I also liked the channel you showed me, but I think I should stick to this forum for the time being.



iNdependent said:


> If you are referring to what I wrote about Si doms/auxes being more "human" than Ni doms/auxes, it's about the ease with which Si users observe and adopt "normal" human behaviour. For them it's more or less without effort, they are attuned to the present moment and notice all sort of details, including details of "how one should be" that escape NJs - Ns in general, actually, making them be perceived as "aliens" in many cases.
> 
> ...
> 
> This sounds like Fi is your inferior, not Se.


That makes sense, especially the part about Si doms/auxes being more grounded through the moment and details. I know being N makes it harder for me to be in the moment and notice details, so with that it'd be harder for me to grasp what someone "should be." 



iNdependent said:


> That is how I became almost sure I'm an INTJ: Te doesn't react as my inf, but Se; that seems to be my ambivalent relation, easily turning into excess in both directions - overindulging or suppressing too much. Chronologically also, by functions' development order: in childhood & puberty I was in a N haze, then in my teens a rise of Te, up to over reliance on it (which often happens when one starts developing a function). Then problems started in my life and it affected my mental functioning too, but that also fits better with the description of Se grip than with any INFP kind of malfunctioning I've read about.
> 
> MBTI type depends on the functions you use; context (including Enn) is important to take into account in order to be subtracted from your general vibe, the type you seem to be, which sometimes isn't the one you are. I probably come off as an INFJ to people who know me little, to friends I certainly come off as an INFP (my best friend typed me as such, but her knowledge of functions was somewhat limited at the time) because I clearly use Fi.
> 
> ...


So if I'm understanding you right, your "core" personality is mostly functions, but is affected by your ennaegram and further modified/hidden by your environment, like how your Ni Te Fi functioning are obscured (for a lack of a better word) by your 4w5 enn. Your NF environment also influenced how you thought, like my ST(?) environment affected me. I'm not sure about chronological development in my case, because it felt like Ni and Te were there at the same time, but I was more extroverted as a kid than I was later. I also displayed Te-Se looping as a teenager, sort of like your Se-gripping. Is that a change from Te to Ni focus?

I'll definitely look into the those forums, thanks!


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