# Have you ever intentionally hurt a person's feelings, or tried to?



## ProfessorLiver (Mar 19, 2011)

Yep, severely, a few months ago, bigest mistake I've ever made.


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## pepperpotts (Aug 2, 2011)

All the time.


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## Abx (Oct 5, 2011)

I have no intention to hurt people or try to hurt them. Thus, if the person trying to mess with me, intentionally block me from my way,then I'll do it to defend myself.


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## Alice_Morgan (Dec 14, 2011)

Yes.
If they've hurt mine, you can bet I'm going to try to get them back.


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## Tristan427 (Dec 9, 2011)

I often lose when me and a person try to insult each other more, I intentionally hold back.

I answered no, then realized several years ago I did. Oh well, you gonna cry about it?


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## Stephen (Jan 17, 2011)

I don't act with the goal of hurting people's feelings, but like most people, I can be insensitive and people feel hurt. If you polled my exes, I could almost guarantee that at least some would insist I hurt their feelings on purpose.


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## intrasearching (Jul 15, 2011)

I do it not infrequently. But usually I keep my mouth shut. My cutting comments meant to harm are always indirect or succinct so as to not grab much attention, but possibly stab into a very small part of the victim's heart. This last spring, however, an ESFJ person who was a friend of my friends grew to frustrate me severely. She was a kind person, and so for months I was kind to her and she thought I was very "sweet". Not infrequently she would express something negative that was painfully obviously meant to garner sympathy. I gave her the sympathy for a good many times. But after a while I grew to hate her and her pathetic ways, and so I'd stay quiet around her or avoid her. One day at dinner, she was complaining about how a friend of mine who she had dated was so mean to her, and I told her that perhaps if she didn't hate herself so much she would stop going for people who reciprocate that self-loathing. She looked down forlornly and said "Yeah..." which made me hate her more. My two friends at the table exclaimed "Ohhh!" obviously both surprised and uncomfortable. I felt ashamed and so I swiftly left the table to hide in my dorm for hours, sour with misanthropy until the next day. I have since found that this is happens to many INTPs. They bottle up their feelings and eventually unleash them in an uncomfortable, abrasive or otherwise inappropriate way. Then they feel ashamed and frustrated with themselves and isolate themselves for a while. Damn you, inferior Fe. Fe makes me dislike or hate those who are frequently emotional, and it makes me emotional experiences abrupt and disconcerting. I almost wish I was an auxiliary Fe user, because they seem to take their emotions in stride and release them more frequently, in an often healthier, less pronounced manner.

It's funny - I used to be so proud to be a T type (I guess I still am, though it makes me generally socially awkward), and now I envy the emotional wisdom and strength of some F types. I suppose I can develop this in myself.


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## Zerosum (Jul 17, 2011)

Lol when I was 8, my brother and I sent a hurtful letter to our neighbours. Im not really sure why... But looking back on it, was pretty stupid and we got in deep trouble for it!


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## Neotriplax (Nov 2, 2011)

when I was a kid I tryed it once ore twice, but its kind of like pissing in your own pool, only made myself feel worse.


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## Doodle (Jan 10, 2012)

Looks like us Ts care more about peoples feeling according to this  although i did click yes

I find i think more of how im making someone feel more than an F would


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## pepperpotts (Aug 2, 2011)

pepperpotts said:


> All the time.


I actually wonder, who the main proponents of sparing peoples feelings actually are? Such a twisted truth!


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## Zheeph (Dec 22, 2011)

I do when my friends need to understand the error in their ways. Sometimes it's the only way to make them think about it and fix whatever is wrong.


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## LQ9 (Jul 24, 2010)

Yes. Only once. I was hurt by something a very close friend of mine had said and I was trying to shock him back to reality.


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## Dashing (Sep 19, 2011)

I *EAT* feelings!


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## Zyforb (Jan 22, 2012)

Yes, but only when the person whose feelings I've hurt did/said something I see as unacceptable in the first place. And it's rarely been hate-filled, per se, I just see someone needs to be put in their place, and then go about doing so.


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## Thalassa (Jun 10, 2010)

In a vengeful way, of course. Usually only with men who have hurt me first in some way, or with people in general who are mean to me. 

I'm not sure this is T or F related, honestly. 

My ESFJ ex liked to watch certain people squirm for entertainment, and so does the ESFJ female I know...but she's more like me in that she's vengeful rather than simply doing it to be mean; however, she admits to being a mean cheerleader in high school.

I've never just randomly tried to hurt someone's feelings though, that would be unconscionable to me. I have a very clear line in mind of "does deserve/does not deserve."

Hurting innocent or undeserving people is a bully, and I could never bully anyone.


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## Thalassa (Jun 10, 2010)

Doodle said:


> Looks like us Ts care more about peoples feeling according to this  although i did click yes
> 
> I find i think more of how im making someone feel more than an F would


Maybe it's because Fs may be more likely to lash out when they've been hurt or their values have been violated? Where as some Ts see no point in doing this, being logical about it.

Dunno. Or maybe it's just random on the poll.


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## cannibaltasticgummybear (Dec 29, 2011)

Yes, if they're annoying or condescending, they clearly need to be knocked down a few notches, so why not?


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## Tophthetomboy (Feb 18, 2012)

No, I like to keep the peace, within myself and even for others. I would rather change their mind instead of hurt them emotionally or physically.


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## MuChApArAdOx (Jan 24, 2011)

Yes i have. If my boundaries are crossed i wiill lash out and react in all sorts of ways that i shouldn't. I've been on the other side of that too. Momentary deeds don't define me thou, so i can easily forgive myself and other people when it happens.


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