# What do Extroverts think of Introverts?



## luemb (Dec 21, 2010)

What do you think about us? Do you dislike introverts because they are not as outgoing as you? or do you like the fact that they are quieter than you?


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## dejavu (Jun 23, 2010)

Introversion does not always equal quiet and extroversion does not always equal outgoing. Just sayin'.

It's all about energy. Introverts gain it by interacting with their inner world, and extroverts gain it by interacting with the outer world.

I usually like introverts. I find them to be interesting and usually get along well with them. The only trouble I tend to run into with them is that I feel like they often don't go my way very much...it's a one-way pursuit. I can get a little hurt when I feel that that is happening.


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

I'm a bit ambiverted, though I label myself as an introvert. I find other introverts a bit extreme compared to myself. I still desire some level of social interaction and don't shy away from social situations much even though they often make me uncomfortable. I get very confused at how some introverts act around me, and I think I confuse them as well. Often we'll be having a really stimulating conversation, and then they eventually feel drained and have to leave, which I don't fully understand. Also, many introverts I meet are very reserved about their personal life to the extent that they won't talk about their feelings or opinions. This goes against everything I look for in a friend or partner, because I believe that communication is extremely important and I feel uncomfortable not knowing what the other person is thinking or feeling.

Basically, I love my introverted friends, but I tend to only talk to the ones that are willing to meet my intimate level of communication. The other introverts I meet rarely ever talk to me and we just can't seem to understand each other very well. So my friends are all either extroverted or extremely close to me. I guess that's pretty normal, since introverts don't like having a lot of distant acquaintances. Most of the introverts I do befriend end up telling me that they feel more intimate in our friendship than they have in a relationship, which can be both comforting and scary for them.


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## luemb (Dec 21, 2010)

dejavu said:


> Introversion does not always equal quiet and extroversion does not always equal outgoing. Just sayin'.
> 
> It's all about energy. Introverts gain it by interacting with their inner world, and extroverts gain it by interacting with the outer world.
> 
> I usually like introverts. I find them to be interesting and usually get along well with them. The only trouble I tend to run into with them is that I feel like they often don't go my way very much...it's a one-way pursuit. I can get a little hurt when I feel that that is happening.


Thank you for your insight. I know that introverts aren't always quiet and vice versa, in fact I can be quite outgoing and talkative at times. 

So you find that you often get to know an introvert very well, and try to figure them out, but they don't try to figure you out back?


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## Mutatio NOmenis (Jun 22, 2009)

Get 'im!






6:15-8:07


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## Aelthwyn (Oct 27, 2010)

as an introvert, I feel like I am very introverted, yet at the same time I am like hziegel and want openness in a relationship. I don't try to hide my thoughts are feelings from people I consdier friends or family - I often don't hide them from strangers either. I really can't immagine holding back from people I'm supposed to be close to. How can you have a relationship then?  I can't stand when people won't tell me what's bothering them, or won't share their preferences or oppinions when asked. I also tend to be very hospitable, in spite of prefering to spend almost all my time alone. 

I have found that while initiating interaciton isn't something I prefer to do, I have had to force myself to do it with my introverted friends - they are almost all introverted - because otherwise we'd never see eachother. I know we still care about eachother even if we don't talk very often, but I find I'm usually the one who bites the bullet and contacts them and organizes things and puts pressure on them to actually show up.


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## chickpeaax (Mar 17, 2011)

It's funny how when an I is having a conversation, they always wait for the other person to stop talking before they start. The Es, however, interupt and talk over each other, and will trail off their sentences, for example ending a story in "yeah... it was really funny... yeah... good times..." because they're waiting for the other person to cut in.

therefore, when an I and an E are together, it seems like the E does all the talking and the I stays silent, because as the E is trailing off thinking 'why won't this person cut in starting to talk?', the I is thinking 'why won't this person stop mumbling so that I can talk?'.

...and it continues. I find this a really funny situation.


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## devoid (Jan 3, 2011)

chickpeaax said:


> It's funny how when an I is having a conversation, they always wait for the other person to stop talking before they start. The Es, however, interupt and talk over each other, and will trail off their sentences, for example ending a story in "yeah... it was really funny... yeah... good times..." because they're waiting for the other person to cut in.
> 
> therefore, when an I and an E are together, it seems like the E does all the talking and the I stays silent, because as the E is trailing off thinking 'why won't this person cut in starting to talk?', the I is thinking 'why won't this person stop mumbling so that I can talk?'.
> 
> ...and it continues. I find this a really funny situation.


You... understand me. T_T

It's true, I never could figure out how to cut into a conversation. I can talk nonstop if allowed to, but I'm terrible at knowing when to interrupt. I tried to figure out how last year and people kept glaring at me because I accidentally cut them off mid-sentence.


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## Thrifty Walrus (Jul 8, 2010)

chickpeaax said:


> It's funny how when an I is having a conversation, they always wait for the other person to stop talking before they start. The Es, however, interupt and talk over each other, and will trail off their sentences, for example ending a story in "yeah... it was really funny... yeah... good times..." because they're waiting for the other person to cut in.
> 
> therefore, when an I and an E are together, it seems like the E does all the talking and the I stays silent, because as the E is trailing off thinking 'why won't this person cut in starting to talk?', the I is thinking 'why won't this person stop mumbling so that I can talk?'.
> 
> ...and it continues. I find this a really funny situation.


Bahaha this is so true, though I think it can get a little skewed when it's two friends. If there's an I who is a close friend than they know to just cut it, but that definitely rings true for just random people or maybe acquaintances.


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## Rose Macabre (Apr 1, 2011)

I'm on the border of en and in so I suppose that I haven't give that much thought. I don't think there is much of a schism between the two.


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## Maethirion (Aug 16, 2009)

What is that game. I want to play it? 
Oh, right. Discussion. I have an extraverted side, where I want everyone to listen to me, but I think everyone gets into that mode when somebody's discussing something you find interesting. I don't know. I get really drained from being around extraverted people. I really don't like fighting over people to be heard, though at that point, I've annoyed myself and possibly other people around me, so I end up backing off. Plus, it's really tiresome. I don't get along well with really extraverted people for some reason. I'm best off with somebody in the middle of introversion and extraversion. Somebody who likes to talk and express themselves, but isn't so caught up in expressing themselves that other people have no room to do anything. I have a hard time being around someone who always has to be the center of attention. I don't think I have a problem with wanting to be the center of attention, but I don't like being ignored, unless I'm in a large group. Then I would rather not be in the group at all. Is there such thing as an auxiliary extravert survival instinct, where the only way for an introvert to survive(socially) is to take on the extravert trait? Anyway, that is my opinion, which is possibly, and probably flawed.


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## tnredhead (Apr 5, 2011)

dejavu said:


> Introversion does not always equal quiet and extroversion does not always equal outgoing. Just sayin'.
> 
> It's all about energy. Introverts gain it by interacting with their inner world, and extroverts gain it by interacting with the outer world.
> 
> I usually like introverts. I find them to be interesting and usually get along well with them. The only trouble I tend to run into with them is that I feel like *they often don't go my way very much*...it's a one-way pursuit. I can get a little hurt when I feel that that is happening.


I'm curious as to what you mean by this. Could you elaborate?


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## tnredhead (Apr 5, 2011)

chickpeaax said:


> It's funny how when an I is having a conversation, they always wait for the other person to stop talking before they start. The Es, however, interupt and talk over each other, and will trail off their sentences, for example ending a story in "yeah... it was really funny... yeah... good times..." because they're waiting for the other person to cut in.
> 
> therefore, when an I and an E are together, it seems like the E does all the talking and the I stays silent, because as the E is trailing off thinking 'why won't this person cut in starting to talk?', the I is thinking 'why won't this person stop mumbling so that I can talk?'.
> 
> ...and it continues. I find this a really funny situation.


This is so true. For me the problem is that I can't stand to be interrupted, so I don't want to do it to others. I try to remember that this is just the way Es converse. I still can't bring myself to interrupt though.


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## dejavu (Jun 23, 2010)

tnredhead said:


> I'm curious as to what you mean by this. Could you elaborate?


I feel as though I desire their company more than they desire mine. As in, I am showing more interest in them than they are in me. It feels highly unequal. I do understand their need to get away...but I suppose I'd have hoped that they could find some other way to show that they care about me and enjoy the friendship just as much as I do, if they can't seek me out as much.

When I am around certain introverts (my mother, for example, an ISTJ) I can feel this pull that they have to get away. I'm a pretty considerate person, so I make it very easy for them and am understanding. I'm not a very draining person, I don't think...I'm on the more introverted side of extroversion, and am somewhat shy. I know they can't help it, they have to recharge, but I still feel a little hurt from time to time when they flee from me. :tongue: Like I said, I'd just appreciate it if they could find some other way to show they care.

It's tough for me. I prefer the company of introverts over extroverts, to be perfectly honest, so I don't exactly have any friends who really seek me out. It feels like a serious treat when one of them calls me.


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## Up and Away (Mar 5, 2011)

Its weird being only slightly introverted.

Its really hard to relate to other introverts sometimes, and it is highly confusing for me.

It is definitely more difficult to relate to extroverts though.


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## Berdudget (Mar 24, 2011)

It has been my experience that extroverts often think it takes me way too long to spit things out. So it can be kind of a strain for them to listen when I do try to "take the floor." I too have no trouble talking about my vulnerabilities and weaknesses, about deeply private information (about myself - not the secrets of others), etc., and sometimes get frustrated with other introverted individuals who I find too hard to open up. I've spent so much time and energy coming out of that place and I value openness deeply. I'm energized by intense one-on-one conversation, as long as there aren't constant distractions. My extroverted friends often think I'm finished speaking and fill the "empty space," when all I'm really doing is pausing between trains of thought. But, for the most part, if there are only a small number of people around and no distractions, the impression I think many of my extroverted friends get is that I'm extroverted. I talk up a storm and sometimes forget to ask questions with the best of them. lol.


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## Kilgore Trout (Jun 25, 2010)

listentothemountains said:


> What do you think about us? Do you dislike introverts because they are not as outgoing as you? or do you like the fact that they are quieter than you?


I like this question but I suspect we'll find different types of answers with extroverts that study MBTI and understand the distinctions of cognitive functions to extroverts that don't study personality theory. We should try to get a wider range of data, from people that study personality theory and people that do not. 

I'll try to find some extroverts (that I know) to give their answers. The only challenge for me would be: how?


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## tnredhead (Apr 5, 2011)

dejavu said:


> I feel as though I desire their company more than they desire mine. As in, I am showing more interest in them than they are in me. It feels highly unequal. I do understand their need to get away...but I suppose I'd have hoped that they could find some other way to show that they care about me and enjoy the friendship just as much as I do, if they can't seek me out as much.
> 
> When I am around certain introverts (my mother, for example, an ISTJ) I can feel this pull that they have to get away. I'm a pretty considerate person, so I make it very easy for them and am understanding. I'm not a very draining person, I don't think...I'm on the more introverted side of extroversion, and am somewhat shy. I know they can't help it, they have to recharge, but I still feel a little hurt from time to time when they flee from me. :tongue: Like I said, *I'd just appreciate it if they could find some other way to show they care.*
> 
> It's tough for me. I prefer the company of introverts over extroverts, to be perfectly honest, so I don't exactly have any friends who really seek me out. It feels like a serious treat when one of them calls me.


Ah, the I/E relationship conundrum. I've certainly seen the look of hurt/rejection in the eyes of loved ones when I need to be on my own for a bit. It's hard to know that the core of who you are can hurt your loved ones so much and yet know that you can not change. We know that explaining to you that we are not rejecting YOU does not negate the fact that you sought us out and want to spend time with us/ be close to us...

Out of curiosity, in what way could your introverted friends show that they cared other than by spending time with you?


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## Berdudget (Mar 24, 2011)

chickpeaax said:


> It's funny how when an I is having a conversation, they always wait for the other person to stop talking before they start. The Es, however, interupt and talk over each other, and will trail off their sentences, for example ending a story in "yeah... it was really funny... yeah... good times..." because they're waiting for the other person to cut in.
> 
> therefore, when an I and an E are together, it seems like the E does all the talking and the I stays silent, because as the E is trailing off thinking 'why won't this person cut in starting to talk?', the I is thinking 'why won't this person stop mumbling so that I can talk?'.
> 
> ...and it continues. I find this a really funny situation.


Have you read Sixteen Ways to Love Your Lover? Good book!


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## Fallen Adalia (Apr 28, 2010)

I love introverts, I like being the only Extrovert in a group of introverts. Maybe I like the attention, most introverts are excellent listeners and are pretty dang chill.

What I like about hanging with _*Extroverts*_ is that I don't have to spend so much time pursuading them to come do some random fun thing with me. While Introverts sometimes will be too tired, shy, or reluctant for one reason or another to do certain things. It's like I think to my self if they spent less time trying to come up with things we could watch on TV and more time getting ready we'd be out there right now doing stuff. Then again I really enjoy chilling with my introverted friends too so its not bad.

*However!*

I've grown up around mostly introverted homebodies and for an ESTP I'm not super adventurous. So taking that into account, I much rather hang with a mess load of Introverts because chances are one of the many introverts will feel like going out at some point. I never find myself trying to keep up, and Introverts don't lack in adventurousness they will misbehave with the best of 'em. 

They just take some convincing sometimes specially if meeting new people is involved. I've been trying to get my childhood friend who is really introverted and very much a couch surfer to meet up with my Super Busy, Super private, Over Achiever INFJ girlfriend... LOL its pretty fricking impossible.

....... I may have to tell them there is a harry potter book signing over at the book store or something.. well I wouldn't go that far they both have pretty epic death stares hmmm


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## tnredhead (Apr 5, 2011)

Souled In said:


> Its weird being only slightly introverted.
> 
> Its really hard to relate to other introverts sometimes, and it is highly confusing for me.
> 
> It is definitely more difficult to relate to extroverts though.


Oh someone in the middle of the I/E spectrum! What makes it hard for you to relate to introverts? Why do you think it is more difficult for you to relate to extroverts than introverts if you fall more to the middle of the spectrum?


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## dejavu (Jun 23, 2010)

tnredhead said:


> Ah, the I/E relationship conundrum. I've certainly seen the look of hurt/rejection in the eyes of loved ones when I need to be on my own for a bit. It's hard to know that the core of who you are can hurt your loved ones so much and yet know that you can not change. We know that explaining to you that we are not rejecting YOU does not negate the fact that you sought us out and want to spend time with us/ be close to us...
> 
> Out of curiosity, in what way could your introverted friends show that they cared other than by spending time with you?


I try to never make my introverted friends feel bad for their natural tendency. I hope that I don't. I spent a good portion of my life thinking I was an introvert, so I do feel that I have a very good understanding of their needs. I don't expect a change (or want one.) I know better than to take their need for alone time personally, but somehow it can still hurt.

It's unfair, but I myself don't have a good idea of how they could show they care. I mean, if I _really_ search for it, I can find it, but it's almost as though I'm imagining it. An ISTP I know, for example...he never calls anybody, but he called me once. He takes weeks to respond to a text, but some people he'll never respond to, and he always eventually gets back to me. It feels like I'm reaching, but I can find some meaning in that.


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## chickpeaax (Mar 17, 2011)

Berdudget said:


> Have you read Sixteen Ways to Love Your Lover? Good book!


I haven't yet! I'll see if I can save up and buy it!


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## Berdudget (Mar 24, 2011)

chickpeaax said:


> I haven't yet! I'll see if I can save up and buy it!


I think it's out of print. I got mine used off half.com for cheap!


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## chickpeaax (Mar 17, 2011)

Berdudget said:


> I think it's out of print. I got mine used off half.com for cheap!


awesome, thanks!


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## StrixAluco (Apr 8, 2011)

chickpeaax said:


> It's funny how when an I is having a conversation, they always wait for the other person to stop talking before they start. The Es, however, interupt and talk over each other, and will trail off their sentences, for example ending a story in "yeah... it was really funny... yeah... good times..." because they're waiting for the other person to cut in.
> 
> therefore, when an I and an E are together, it seems like the E does all the talking and the I stays silent, because as the E is trailing off thinking 'why won't this person cut in starting to talk?', the I is thinking 'why won't this person stop mumbling so that I can talk?'.
> 
> ...and it continues. I find this a really funny situation.


Well, if you're talking about typical conversation (small talk), then you're probably right but it's not quite true otherwise. I am strongly introvert and find myself interupting people and making long monologue when debating over a subject I know, have an opinion or simply when thinking with someone else.
I definitely "do all the talking" with some Extraverted people when I start talking, I can be extremely quiet and solitary but I am also very talkative at times and I've seen many other Introverts doing the same in some areas. What they don't seem to enjoy is small talk, they tend to be quiet when they should be talking about something they don't really care about or don't enjoy, extraverts, for some reasons, seem more open about everythings (at least, willing to talk) and may not stand solitude or "awkward silence" but they might be surprised when debating with an introvert. 

Which is probably why some people mistake us for extroverts with social phobia or shyness. While we can be shy and suffer from social phobia, we can also monopolise a conversation without turning into extroverts.

However, I've notices that extroverts tend to constantly ask each other's opinions while introverts are more likely to tell everything and they confront their idea. I don't know whether it's systematic or just depending on one's social skills but I think that we interact with people less than extrovert even when having a real conversation.


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## randomness123 (Mar 28, 2011)

I'm an ENTP so I'm the least extroverted extrovert, so I can empathise with them. I actually find their quiet little ways followed by the occasional bit of unexpected artistic genius quite adorable


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## Neon Knight (Aug 11, 2010)

Energy wise I'm extreme extravert on the scale, behaviour I guess ambivert would be more descriptive. I think most of my friends are introverts so obviously I like them, I especially love to watch them let loose, it's a lot of fun.  I don't force it like some people though because I've had people try to force me when having SAD episodes and it sucks so I also empathise with them as well especially when feeling on the antisocial side.


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## Romascu (Apr 27, 2011)

By the very nature of the site and the kind of people it attracts (extroverts that at least in theory understand introverts) you will get very different opinions of extroverts here than most extroverts in real life.


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

Aelthwyn said:


> as an introvert, I feel like I am very introverted, yet at the same time I am like hziegel and want openness in a relationship. I don't try to hide my thoughts are feelings from people I consdier friends or family - I often don't hide them from strangers either. I really can't immagine holding back from people I'm supposed to be close to. How can you have a relationship then?  I can't stand when people won't tell me what's bothering them, or won't share their preferences or opinions when asked. I also tend to be very hospitable, in spite of prefering to spend almost all my time alone.


This is what I was going to say.


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

chickpeaax said:


> It's funny how when an I is having a conversation, they always wait for the other person to stop talking before they start. The Es, however, interupt and talk over each other, and will trail off their sentences, for example ending a story in "yeah... it was really funny... yeah... good times..." because they're waiting for the other person to cut in.
> 
> therefore, when an I and an E are together, it seems like the E does all the talking and the I stays silent, because as the E is trailing off thinking 'why won't this person cut in starting to talk?', the I is thinking 'why won't this person stop mumbling so that I can talk?'.
> 
> ...and it continues. I find this a really funny situation.


Oh! I never realized that was what they were doing.  No wonder I tend to feel left out when conversing with groups of extroverts. 

Here is what I had assumed, until I read this.
The extroverts start talking about something that doesn't interest me, so I am silent and just listen, waiting until I have something to add. By the time the conversation gets interesting and I get an idea I want to express, they have already formed a certain flow in which they don't leave any spaces for anyone else to join in between one person talking and the next person talking, so I am stuck in my silence until someone asks me something specifically or says to the other, "Snail's being awfully quiet. I wonder what she thinks about all of this." ...but it never occurred to me to think that they just didn't leave spaces even for each other, and that they pushed through anyhow. I never really thought to check for whether they were interrupting each other, and it's not the kind of thing I would notice. I would naturally assume they must be leaving spaces for each other, or else it would never shift from being one speaker's turn to being the next speaker's turn.

If you are right, this information might end up saving my social life, after a lifetime of feeling excluded.


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## StandingTiger (Dec 25, 2010)

I like introverts. 

However, I dislike the fact that many introverts seem to think they're more intelligent and introspective than extroverts simply because they're quieter and/or have more difficulty socializing. Those abilities are not mutually exclusive.


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## Romascu (Apr 27, 2011)

hmwith said:


> I like introverts.
> 
> However, I dislike the fact that many introverts seem to think they're more intelligent and introspective than extroverts simply because they're quieter and/or have more difficulty socializing. Those abilities are not mutually exclusive.


That's just spiteful , i see no correlation between difficulty socializing and intelligence or introspection.

I'll try to justify your assumption of an assumption:

The fact that introverts tend to spend more time alone means they get to know themselves better, they have more time to think about themselves and how and why they act , what makes em tick -- thus the introspection thing , and more intelligent because in many cases they tend to get their info from more reliable mediums than word of mouth.


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## StandingTiger (Dec 25, 2010)

Romascu said:


> I'll try to justify your assumption of an assumption:
> 
> The fact that introverts tend to spend more time alone means they get to know themselves better, they have more time to think about themselves and how and why they act , what makes em tick -- thus the introspection thing , and more intelligent because in many cases they tend to get their info from more reliable mediums than word of mouth.


It's _not_ an assumption. It's been said to me as blunty as I said it here but many people, both on the forum and in real life. Do all introverts feel this way? Absolutely not. But many do.

You're the only one making assumptions, and they're incorrect. You're assuming that all introverts spend more time alone than extroverts, which isn't always true. I spend significantly more time alone than most of the introverted friends. And I know many people who spend much time alone without any introspection whatsoever.

You're also assuming that extroverts educate themselves by word-of-mouth, which isn't true at all. I'm very well-read. I'm confused as to what point you are trying to make here.


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## Romascu (Apr 27, 2011)

hmwith said:


> It's _not_ an assumption. It's been said to me as blunty as I said it here but many people, both on the forum and in real life.
> 
> You're assuming that all introverts spend more time alone than extroverts, which isn't always true. And I know many people who spend much time alone without any introspection whatsoever. You're also assuming that extroverts educate themselves by word-of-mouth, which isn't true at all. I'm confused as to what point you are trying to make here.
> 
> Do all introverts feel this way? Absolutely not. But many do.


You're assuming that all introverts spend more time alone than extroverts -- they have to unless they want to go insane or at least function at a lower capacity---there may be some who force themselves to be that way but we are talking about a introverts in their "natural habitat" ---those who explicitly say they are introverted and acknowedge what that implies- i think have a lower tendency to go against their nature (knowing they will harm themselves)-- its like someone telling the class they have dirty underpants, that person is less likely to give a fuck about what others think of them.

And I know many people who spend much time alone without any introspection whatsoever-- those most likely are extroverted outcasts, they crave social contact and feel lonely but can't get it.


You're also assuming that extroverts educate themselves by word-of-mouth, which isn't true at all-- again we are talking about extroverts in their natural habitat - if they spend more time with people than the average introvert they are less likely to educate themselves through other means than an introvert.

As for the point---playing devils advocate and trying to justify what you think.


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## StandingTiger (Dec 25, 2010)

Romascu said:


> As for the point---playing devils advocate and trying to justify what you think.


I was simply paraphrasing the thoughts of others (introverts).

I think that introverts and extroverts have potential to be equally intelligent and introspect equally well, depending on the individual.

If you disagree, that's fine. The point I was making was that many introverts _would_ disagree with this statement of mine, so your comments are validating it. I expected as much.


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## Romascu (Apr 27, 2011)

hmwith said:


> I was simply paraphrasing the thoughts of others (introverts).
> 
> I think that introverts and extroverts have potential to be equally intelligent and introspect equally well, depending on the individual.
> 
> If you disagree, that's fine. The point I was making was that many introverts _would_ disagree with this statement of mine, so your comments are validating it. I expected as much.


Your first assumption was that introverts think themselves more intelligent and introspective (1) and your second was because they are more quiet and have difficulty socializing (2) .

Trying to justify your assumption (1) of another assumption (2)

And i did---they think that way (if they do) because--- --- and i correlated that with the second.

Just a theoretical assembly-- true or not.


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## StandingTiger (Dec 25, 2010)

Romascu said:


> Your first assumption was that introverts think themselves more intelligent and introspective (1) and your second was because they are more quiet and have difficulty socializing (2) .


To reiterate, *it wasn't my assumption*. It's something that many introverts have said, IRL and on _Personality Cafe_.

Unfortunately, I'm not sure what you're missing or how to better explain.


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## Kr3m1in (Jan 16, 2011)

hmwith said:


> To reiterate, *it wasn't my assumption*. It's something that many introverts have said, IRL and on _Personality Cafe_.
> 
> Unfortunately, I'm not sure what you're missing or how to better explain.


the specimen you're conversing with, sugar tits, has labeled himself previously as 'an introvert sepremacist' and 'a male supremacist'.

you might be wasting breath on this one. just sayin'.


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## Kr3m1in (Jan 16, 2011)

I like introverts..

Reasons why I may not like certain introverts are:
-social ineptness
-thinking they are "deeper" than everyone else
-being overly sensitive to the opinions/judgments of others
-dismissing trying new things due to the fact that they aren't social enough to


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