# Cheating - Guys only



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

There's a lot society has to say with regards to cheating. I'm here to clear this up for all the young men who are confused and suffering as a result of their cheating.

First, why does a man cheat? Because he can. This is a fact that you just have to accept. As long as you have options, you will have a natural urge to exercise those options. It doesn't matter if you have a 10 at home, you have it in you to sleep with a far less attractive woman with a far less appealing personality no matter how much you love your woman. Refuse to accept this fact and your options will forever dictate whether you cheat or not. Accept this fact, and you can control your options and thus control cheating.

So how does one control his options?

1. Focus on your life. Idle time is a recipe for all kinds of disaster.

2. Limit interactions with the opposite sex; lower your gaze, never allow yourself to be alone with a woman, don't go to places where people hook up, play dumb when women hit on you.

3. Discuss your sexual needs with your woman. Numbers 1 and 2 become a damn lot harder if number 3 is not being met. So figure out whether she is physically capable of meeting your needs. Most women aren't. If she is the exception to the rule, you've lucked out. If she is not, you need to find yourself a second, third or fourth woman. Not affairs. Multiple committed relationships. Of course this means you will need to treat them equally regardless of personal feelings and dedicate double, triple or quadruple the time and resources, mentally, physically, emotionally, and financially. This is not easy. Especially if you work a lot.

If your woman is not open to the idea of you having a second relationship, explain to her what the nature of a man actually is. A lot of women simply don't know. They've been fed to many lies. If she's not understanding, your best option is to end this relationship and find yourself a more agreeable woman.


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## Cetanu (Jan 20, 2012)

Cheating is going against a promise of fidelity. People go against promises when they have no integrity. People have no integrity in matters that are not important to them.


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## ENTJudgement (Oct 6, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> There's a lot society has to say with regards to cheating. I'm here to clear this up for all the young men who are confused and suffering as a result of their cheating.
> 
> First, why does a man cheat? Because he can. This is a fact that you just have to accept. As long as you have options, you will have a natural urge to exercise those options. It doesn't matter if you have a 10 at home, you have it in you to sleep with a far less attractive woman with a far less appealing personality no matter how much you love your woman. Refuse to accept this fact and your options will forever dictate whether you cheat or not. Accept this fact, and you can control your options and thus control cheating.


I get what you're saying but most logical men would weigh the pros and cons and see that cheating with a 6/10 and potentially losing your 10/10 is a dumb idea and would not proceed as it's like trading your Ferrari for a Honda Civic.

Furthermore, it's highly questionable why I would even want to have sex with an uglier woman, my 10/10 would have to be withholding sex to begin with for me to even consider looking at a 6/10. In fact, because I currently have a 10/10, looking at 6/10s will just remind me of how much I don't want to have sex with them.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Cetanu said:


> Cheating is going against a promise of fidelity. People go against promises when they have no integrity. People have no integrity in matters that are not important to them.


I agree. But that's not the whole story. Another reason people lack integrity is ignorance. Otherwise successful married men who stand to lose, not only the woman they love, but also half of their life's work, would never cheat. And guess what? They do cheat. You could argue that they don't really love their wife, but could you argue that they don't care about losing decades of wealth?


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## Jabbadonut (Mar 23, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> There's a lot society has to say with regards to cheating. I'm here to clear this up for all the young men who are confused and suffering as a result of their cheating.
> 
> First, why does a man cheat? Because he can. This is a fact that you just have to accept. As long as you have options, you will have a natural urge to exercise those options. It doesn't matter if you have a 10 at home, you have it in you to sleep with a far less attractive woman with a far less appealing personality no matter how much you love your woman. Refuse to accept this fact and your options will forever dictate whether you cheat or not. Accept this fact, and you can control your options and thus control cheating.
> 
> ...


I like number 1. Numbers 2 and 3, not so much.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

ENTJudgement said:


> I get what you're saying but most logical men would weigh the pros and cons and see that cheating with a 6/10 and potentially losing your 10/10 is a dumb idea and would not proceed as it's like trading your Ferrari for a Honda Civic.
> 
> Furthermore, it's highly questionable why I would even want to have sex with an uglier woman, my 10/10 would have to be withholding sex to begin with for me to even consider looking at a 6/10. In fact, because I currently have a 10/10, looking at 6/10s will just remind me of how much I don't want to have sex with them.


Well, yes. But even among logical men, they could conclude that there is a 99% chance they could take the civic for a test drive and still keep the Ferrari. Then you have to also take into account that some men's options mean they could very easily get another Ferrari.


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## ENTJudgement (Oct 6, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> Well, yes. But even among logical men, they could conclude that there is a 99% chance they could take the civic for a test drive and still keep the Ferrari. Then you have to also take into account that some men's options mean they could very easily get another Ferrari.


I see where you're going with this but why would you consent to a monogamous marriage/LTR with a woman if you're going to try different girls to begin with? A high value man with plenty of options who wants to try out all the cars can do so but he doesn't have to commit to a car, in your example it sounded as if hes committed to the car then chose to "cheat" the commitment.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Jabbadonut said:


> I like number 1. Numbers 2 and 3, not so much.


I don't think anyone does lol. But if you find yourself cheating and don't know what to do, it's a fool proof system.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

ENTJudgement said:


> I see where you're going with this but why would you consent to a monogamous marriage/LTR with a woman if you're going to try different girls to begin with?


It's what most men and women are raised believing. You're supposed to be in a long term monogamous relationship.



ENTJudgement said:


> A high value man with plenty of options who wants to try out all the cars can do so but he doesn't have to commit to a car, in your example it sounded as if hes committed to the car then chose to "cheat" the commitment.


Most high value men have this problem worked out. They "cheat" with their partner's consent. It's not just high value men who have options though. There are plenty of men who are average value in terms of a relationship but have a lot of options when it comes to sex.


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

ENFPathetic said:


> There's a lot society has to say with regards to cheating. I'm here to clear this up for all the young men who are confused and suffering as a result of their cheating.
> 
> First, why does a man cheat? Because he can. This is a fact that you just have to accept. As long as you have options, you will have a natural urge to exercise those options. It doesn't matter if you have a 10 at home, you have it in you to sleep with a far less attractive woman with a far less appealing personality no matter how much you love your woman. Refuse to accept this fact and your options will forever dictate whether you cheat or not. Accept this fact, and you can control your options and thus control cheating.
> 
> ...


As far as I'm concerned, cheating is what horny young men do because they are (at first) more loyal to their penises than they are to any one woman. Most men grow out of this. 

As for the rest of our brethren, I think there are 3 camps (to varying degrees): 

1. There are rich and powerful men who can afford to fool around (and there are women who will indulge them because of it). 

2. There are men who feel stuck in loveless marriages where the wife can't be bothered to sleep with them anymore, so they either find a "side piece" or pay a hooker. 

3. The men who are still loyal to their wives, who are actually in love with a woman who loves them back, wants what's best for them, still finds a reason to sleep with them, and they're just perfectly happy to have a best friend who still finds them attractive (because they're far too broke and tired to go looking for it anywhere else and they're happy right where they are).


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Not a guy but why cheat? Just set up an open relationship of some form, whether swinger style (wide open) or some variety of polyamory. On the other hand, your partner will also be able to diddle on the side which most guys have a problem with and if you have a problem with that, y'all are ragingly hypocritical.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

tanstaafl28 said:


> As far as I'm concerned, cheating is what horny young men do because they are (at first) more loyal to their penises than they are to any one woman. Most men grow out of this.
> 
> As for the rest of our brethren, I think there are 3 camps (to varying degrees):
> 
> ...


Men don't grow out of "being horny". Some get out of shape once their metabolism slows down. For the men who look after themselves, they retain their appetite for sex well into their 60s and 70s.

I understand that some men can be satisfied by the average woman. But they are the exception and not the rule. The average man has a significantly higher sex drive than the average woman.


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## Who'sWho (Dec 22, 2020)

If people follow your 3step program they will still cheat because you:

1) Didn't emphasize love. Your definition of relationship is primarily sexual. (More on this later)

2) never mentioned the lack of consideration of your partners feelings. Cheating hurts others, you know? Those you supposedly love. If you can't empathize and look deeper at what a relationship is, than cheating is just something you will do to satisfy your penis, just as one satisfies hunger with fast food. This is indication that you fail to understand love.

3) you conceptualize your own sex urges as "needs". This one is crucial. Sorry, but you won't die or go mad if you don't fulfill your sexual urges. They are optional, therefore they are not needs but urges, craves, desires. Also, can any person really satisfy your sexual urges? I mean, your woman can be an 11 out of 10, a world class beauty, but you can still get horny at your job were a cute 7 out of 10 coworker comes to work wearing visible hot lingerie, trowing herself at you. Every person has a different energy, and this makes every women appealing in a different way. 

Sure, if a person is sexualy disatisfied in a relationship, maybe doesn't see their partner as physically attractive for some reason, they should think of a way to fix it, and if you can't, they should highly consider breaking up.

But, if that is not the case - and you actually enjoy and cherrish your sex, then you should maybe reconsider your priorities. 

4) Because of your view on sexual "needs", I stick to my conclusion that you don't understand love enough, and you basically see relationships as emotionally intensified sexual concubinates. This means you fail to grasp the crucial component of integrity. Love is as much a spiritual connection with your partner as it is physical. And by spiritual, I think of things like - developing deep trust and integrity, seeing her and her own wellbeing as at least equally important as your own. In love, we can transcend our self-interested conception, and definitely be able to control ourselves for the benefits of your partner and your mutual future. In a healthy relationship, it should be easy - for example - to quit some of your bad habits because your partners sees it as crucial for your common wellbeing. 

To summarize, I liked your advice of keeping away from other women, this should be employed to a reasonable degree. There is no reason to often be in a private 1 on 1 situation with another woman, especially if you suspect she wants you. And I liked your advice of keeping busy. But ultimately, this will only make you cheat less often, but will not make you stop cheating.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

mia-me said:


> Not a guy but why cheat? Just set up an open relationship of some form, whether swinger style (wide open) or some variety of polyamory. On the other hand, your partner will also be able to diddle on the side which most guys have a problem with and if you have a problem with that, y'all are ragingly hypocritical.


It's just not practical. People who get into relationships typically do so in order to raise a family. A man can provide for and protect multiple families, a woman only has one womb.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> It's just not practical. *People who get into relationships typically do so in order to raise a family.* A man can provide for and protect multiple families, a woman only has one womb.


Perhaps in your country but not in mine. Over the pond, we typically enter relationships with people we love.

edit: Oh, you're likely muslim since you live in Turkey. Muslims often adhere to hardcore gender roles which include sexist double standards.


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## Who'sWho (Dec 22, 2020)

Edit: this post was knee jerk reaction, deleting


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Who'sWho said:


> If people follow your 3step program they will still cheat because you:
> 
> 1) Didn't emphasize love. Your definition of relationship is primarily sexual. (More on this later)
> 
> ...


I understand love. But just like sex, you don't need to be in a committed relationship to be in love. Plenty of affairs happen because someone fell in love with an already married person. Love isn't necessarily pure and innocent.

The notion of starting a relationship because of love is a hollywood notion. The major reason men and women have formed relationships for all of human history is to raise a family. Love and sex are naturally a part of the deal, but the main purpose is to raise a family.

Sex is a need. Without it, your mental health will suffer and so will your physical health.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

mia-me said:


> Perhaps in your country but not in mine. Over the pond, we typically enter relationships with people we love.
> 
> edit: Oh, you're likely muslim since you live in Turkey. Muslims often adhere to hardcore gender roles which include sexist double standards.


And how is it working out for most people? What's the divorce rate like in your country?

Btw, I'm from the UK. I've been in Turkey for 6 months and there's a partial lock down so I have yet to see much over here, but from what I've seen so far, people here behave and dress the same way they do across the rest of europe. Maybe they're a bit more friendly. In any case, that's probably a lot more than you know about Turkey. More importantly, even if you actually knew what you were talking about, it's irrelevant to this topic.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> And how is it working out for most people? What's the divorce rate like in your country?
> 
> Btw, I'm from the UK. I've been in Turkey for 6 months and there's a partial lock down so I have yet to see much over here, but from what I've seen so far, people here behave and dress the same way they do across the rest of europe. Maybe they're a bit more friendly. In any case, that's probably a lot more than you know about Turkey. More importantly, even if you actually knew what you were talking about, it's irrelevant to this topic.


Relationship =/= marriage.


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

ENFPathetic said:


> I understand love. But just like sex, you don't need to be in a committed relationship to be in love. Plenty of affairs happen because someone fell in love with an already married person. Love isn't necessarily pure and innocent.
> 
> The notion of starting a relationship because of love is a hollywood notion. The major reason men and women have formed relationships for all of human history is to raise a family. Love and sex are naturally a part of the deal, but the main purpose is to raise a family.
> 
> Sex is a need. Without it, your mental health will suffer and so will your physical health.


But that's not love--that is lust.

If you love someone, then you respect their boundaries. Having a monogamous relationship is a boundary.

If you love someone, you don't try to destroy the things they love. They love their monogamous relationship and so loving them means caring for what they care about to some degree as well, because when the things we care about are harmed, it harms us. That also means caring about their partner.

That is love--it's not the same thing as lust.

I am not a guy but having boundaries is a normal and healthy thing for people, and loving relationships agree upon and respect boundaries. In most situations, having an affair is not a loving thing to do because it is a violation of someone's boundaries. So it is better not to do.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

ENFPathetic said:


> I think my solution is better.
> 
> 1. Most men are eliminated as potential suitors by women before anything else. The kind of men women are happy to share are very very small in number.


Are you one of those 0.1% of men who are 6ft+ tall, in good physical condition and make at $500,000 a year in income?

No offence, but if you're posting here then I suspect the answer to these questions is no - in which case, the model you propose does not benefit you.



ENFPathetic said:


> I think my solution is better.
> You're right. But you have to understand that wars are common throughout history. Peace is never long lasting. Even so, under usual circumstances, there is usually a surplus of single available women.


In most major cities, single men significantly outnumber single women until about age 45.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Red Panda said:


> not if they spend their free time seducing people on tiktok as teens instead of building skills


That's a very limited view on life.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

mia-me said:


> That's a very limited view on life.


What alternative would you propose, and who would benefit from it?


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

mia-me said:


> That's a very limited view on life.


what's limited? that people who innovate tend to spend their time in building those skills instead of seduction?


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Meliodas said:


> What alternative would you propose, and who would benefit from it?


My comment was a flip answer to a flip response, relative to the false dichotomy of sex vs intellectual pursuit. One can do both where I don't care if others are polyamorous or monogamous. It's their choice.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Red Panda said:


> what's limited? that people who innovate tend to spend their time in building those skills instead of seduction?


Seduction doesn't take much time.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Meliodas said:


> Are you one of those 0.1% of men who are 6ft+ tall, in good physical condition and make at $500,000 a year in income?
> 
> No offence, but if you're posting here then I suspect the answer to these questions is no - in which case, the model you propose does not benefit you.


I don't make anything close to 500k, but I tick the rest of the boxes. And it does benefit me. I already make good money and I have yet to hit my financial stride as a man. Admittedly I don't know if I'll ever make that kind of money to be fair, but my prospects are looking pretty good. Also keep in mind that 500k a year is what you would need to support more than one household in countries like Japan and the UK, but there are plenty of well developed nations where the cost of living is less than a tenth of that.



Meliodas said:


> In most major cities, single men significantly outnumber single women until about age 45.


I agree with you. But don't find you it interesting? Generally, the population of major cities is 51% female. So why are there more single than single women?


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

mia-me said:


> Seduction doesn't take much time.


being mentally focused on it does
it's about where one's drive is directed


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

mia-me said:


> Seduction doesn't take much time.


Perhaps from a woman's perspective. But your typical man spends a lot of time and resources on seduction.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Red Panda said:


> being mentally focused on it does
> it's about where one's drive is directed


Teens are hopped up on hormones. They don't need to put any effort into thinking about sex, lol.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> Perhaps from a woman's perspective. But your typical man spends a lot of time and resources on seduction.


Perhaps in the old world but not a lot in today's society, in developed countries. That said, the typical internet denizen male would be a different story.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

mia-me said:


> My comment was a flip answer to a flip response, relative to the false dichotomy of sex vs intellectual pursuit. One can do both where I don't care if others are polyamorous or monogamous. It's their choice.





mia-me said:


> Seduction doesn't take much time.


That is true, but learning how to seduce effectively takes many years to master, just like any other skill. Fortunately, at least for men, it's not too late so long as you start in your mid/late 20s.



ENFPathetic said:


> I don't make anything close to 500k, but I tick the rest of the boxes. And it does benefit me. I already make good money and I have yet to hit my financial stride as a man. Admittedly I don't know if I'll ever make that kind of money to be fair, but my prospects are looking pretty good. Also keep in mind that 500k a year is what you would need to support more than one household in countries like Japan and the UK, but there are plenty of well developed nations where the cost of living is less than a a tenth of that.


You make a fair point about the cost of living. I live in one of the most expensive suburbs of the fourth most expensive city for property in the entire world. That certainly affects the dating scene here. I don't make nearly 500K a year either but I am lucky to at least have no debt and some promising investments.

I meet the other conditions though...maybe I should move to Turkey and start a harem then, lol.



ENFPathetic said:


> I agree with you. But don't find it interesting? Generally, the population of major cities is 51% female. So why are there more single than single women?


We both know the answer to that question


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Meliodas said:


> That is true, but learning how to seduce effectively takes many years to master, just like any other skill. Fortunately, at least for men, it's not too late so long as you start in your mid/late 20s.


Consider hookup culture in college and even the latter years of high school. There are plenty of teens and young adult males who aren't the top 10%, who hookup regularly.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

mia-me said:


> Consider hookup culture in college and even the latter years of high school. There are plenty of teens and young adult males who aren't the top 10%, who hookup regularly.


That may be true but Red Panda still has a point. The teens who partake in hookup culture aren't usually the ones who get the best grades, and the modern economy isn't very jock friendly. Therefore for the most part, I think it's better for a man to spend those years developing other skills and talents. For a woman, the calculus is somewhat different of course.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Meliodas said:


> That may be true but Red Panda still has a point. *The teens who partake in hookup culture aren't usually the ones who get the best grades*, and the modern economy isn't very jock friendly. Therefore for the most part, I think it's better for a man to spend those years developing other skills and talents. For a woman, the calculus is somewhat different of course.


That's an inaccurate stereotype. It's not just jocks who are hooking up.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

mia-me said:


> That's an inaccurate stereotype. It's not just jocks who are hooking up.


It absolutely is accurate if online dating apps like Tinder are anything to go by.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Meliodas said:


> It absolutely is accurate if online dating apps like Tinder are anything to go by.


Whether Tinder or any other dating means, looks are advantageous. This doesn't mean that non-jocks aren't attractive.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

mia-me said:


> Perhaps in the old world but not a lot in today's society, in developed countries. That said, the typical internet denizen male would be a different story.


I don't know what unique part of the developed world you live in, but men typically incur the lion's share of the financial costs of dating. There are exceptions to the rule. I'm one of them. But most guys are not tall dark and handsome. They're going to need a large wallet or a lot of game. Neither comes easy.

It's actually in less developed countries where poor unattractive guys get success.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> I don't know what unique part of the developed world you live in, but men typically incur the lion's share of the financial costs of dating. There are exceptions to the rule. I'm one of them. But most guys are not tall dark and handsome. They're going to need a large wallet or a lot of game. Neither comes easy.
> 
> It's actually in less developed countries where poor unattractive guys get success.


Today's dating is primarily coffee dates and more often than not, the bill's split.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Meliodas said:


> You make a fair point about the cost of living. I live in one of the most expensive suburbs of the fourth most expensive city for property in the entire world. That certainly affects the dating scene here. I don't make nearly 500K a year either but I am lucky to at least have no debt and some promising investments.
> 
> I meet the other conditions though...maybe I should move to Turkey and start a harem then, lol.


That's what I love to hear. You joke, but I encourage you to check out Turkey. I haven't had the most interactions because we're in partial lockdown, but the women are very similar to other European women albeit a bit more feminine.



Meliodas said:


> We both know the answer to that question


Haha. You have to admit. When applied to the real world, my suggestions are more on men rather a green light.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

SirCanSir said:


> View attachment 875935
> 
> 
> 
> ...


So we can avoid unnecessary back and forth that goes no where, please quote and highlight the part of my post that made you think I believe cheating is a part of men's nature.


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

ENFPathetic said:


> So we can avoid unnecessary back and forth that goes no where, please quote and highlight the part of my post that made you think I believe cheating is a part of men's nature.












here you focus on men's ability to cheat only. 









you are talking about the man's nature to have multiple relationships with women here also. 

Im not really sure about what you were trying to propose by multiple equally commited relationships at the same time and still be part of a monogamous relationship unless you are talking about polyamory, which strays from the topic a bit since the rules that apply to cheating are entirely different in that context.


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

DOGSOUP said:


> sorry, but it's just so funny to me that X/10 is how you all really think.


Maybe it is in "men's nature" to have a number fetish? It's so romantic, I think. To reduce a human being to a number, like you're making some kind of yelp review.


Roses are red and violets are blue

you are a ten

unlike when you were a two

the other day when I saw you without makeup

---Teh Menz



(Sorry I'm not trying to blast on you @SirCanSir I was thinking about pulling up that information on the increase of women's infidelity--but I just want to agree with dogsoop here b/c it is kind of funny, though to me it also seems kind of sad that is how it's normal to talk about human beings for a lot of people)


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

WickerDeer said:


> Maybe it is in "men's nature" to have a number fetish? It's so romantic, I think. To reduce a human being to a number, like you're making some kind of yelp review.
> 
> 
> Roses are red and violets are blue
> ...


the number thing is just a rating of a preference the way i see it. Most of the time is not objective since to an extent beauty standards and especially personality standards are also subjective. I dont really think much about it its just how its often used in guy friendly settings to describe a female they are eyeing.

But i do see the utility to make a point using a number sometimes kek.

And i dont think its strictly a guy thing anymore. Ive seen women rating guys also recently.


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

SirCanSir said:


> the number thing is just a rating of a preference the way i see it. Most of the time is not objective since to an extent beauty standards and especially personality standards are also subjective. I dont really think much about it its just how its often used in guy friendly settings to describe a female they are eyeing.
> 
> But i do see the utility to make a point using a number sometimes kek.
> 
> And i dont think its strictly a guy thing anymore. Ive seen women rating guys also recently.


I don't think it's a guy thing either--but it seems more common...I guess I just associate it with PUA because that's where I first heard about it.

I tried to ignore it but it just seems to be getting stronger, so wanted to commiserate.

I'm curious what happens like...say if someone has a wife who's a 10/10 but she gets cancer or something--does she then change to a lower number? Like, because I'm sure people being sick isn't really most people's preferences. So she's now like a 6 or a 5 or something?

Really wonderful stuff.

But yeah--I get that it's easier to use to make a point. It's just something that's so blatant now that it's nice to see someone else who finds it "funny." But yeah--I get what you're saying--it's an easy way of reducing a person to reflect your preferences, when discussing preferences and attraction.

I mean--I really do understand why you and others use it. And I'm not trying to personally blame or call people out for using what is pretty much commonly accepted way to value people. But I still feel a bit salty about it. That's all.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

WickerDeer said:


> Maybe it is in "men's nature" to have a number fetish? It's so romantic, I think. To reduce a human being to a number, like you're making some kind of yelp review.


it's a really weird way to evaluate attractiveness to me but I guess it saves the trouble of writing sonnets


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

DOGSOUP said:


> it's a really weird way to evaluate attractiveness to me but I guess it saves the trouble of writing sonnets


Yes! Not everyone likes poetry. Some people prefer maths (ugh feels so weird to say "maths")


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

SirCanSir said:


> View attachment 875939
> 
> 
> here you focus on men's ability to cheat only.


It's true. Men cheat because they can. Why does that make you think I believe it's a part of men's nature?



SirCanSir said:


> View attachment 875940
> 
> you are talking about the man's nature to have multiple relationships with women here also.


For most of human history men have been polygamous. When talking about a man's nature, monogamy is not the norm. A lot of women don't know this and to make matters worse they are told lies like men and women are the same when that's just not true.



SirCanSir said:


> Im not really sure about what you were trying to propose by multiple equally commited relationships at the same time and still be part of a monogamous relationship unless you are talking about polyamory, which strays from the topic a bit since the rules that apply to cheating are entirely different in that context.


If you have a partner, you have duty towards them. You provide for them, protect them, support etc. If you have a second partner, you have the same duty towards them as well. You also have to treat them equally. If you buy a gift for one partner, you have buy a gift for the other partner. Basically don't play favourites even if you love one partner more than you love the other.


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

WickerDeer said:


> I don't think it's a guy thing either--but it seems more common...I guess I just associate it with PUA because that's where I first heard about it.
> 
> I tried to ignore it but it just seems to be getting stronger, so wanted to commiserate.
> 
> ...


I think that i never once considered a rating once i got close with someone or together. After that point attachment/feelings would make it really blurry anyway. And i can see myself getting mad over someone reducing my girlfriend down to her looks or sexual appeal and try to devalue her in front of me. I dont mind if its used a joke though.
But yeah there isnt really a reason to overthink it overall. Taking rating that seriously to the point you would devalue someone just because they get sick is too shallow / immature in the first place. 
Its just fine to me as long as its used to make a point or compare attractiveness ig. In the end of the day those ratings are still subjective.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

WickerDeer said:


> I don't think it's a guy thing either--but it seems more common...I guess I just associate it with PUA because that's where I first heard about it.
> 
> I tried to ignore it but it just seems to be getting stronger, so wanted to commiserate.
> 
> ...


Think of it as an abbreviation. If a guy says that woman's a 10. He's saying she's drop dead gorgeous.

Edit: It makes sense why you don't like it. It's kind of shallow. I'm 34 years old and I understand that a woman's beauty doesn't do shit for my well being or happiness, while her personality is in large parts the difference between a miserable relationship and a happy one. Even so, I can't help but focus on looks before anything else.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

ENFPathetic said:


> Think of it as an abbreviation. If a guy says that woman's a 10. He's saying she's drop dead gorgeous.


Genuinely thought it was a 'how badly do I wanna tap that' scale


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

DOGSOUP said:


> Genuinely thought it was a 'how badly do I wanna tap that' scale


I guess it depends on the context. Sircansir used it as a "how cool her personality is" scale a few posts back. Personally I use it to describe beauty.


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

SirCanSir said:


> I think that i never once considered a rating once i got close with someone or together. After that point attachment/feelings would make it really blurry anyway. And i can see myself getting mad over someone reducing my girlfriend down to her looks or sexual appeal and try to devalue her in front of me. I dont mind if its used a joke though.
> But yeah there isnt really a reason to overthink it overall. Taking rating that seriously to the point you would devalue someone just because they get sick is too shallow / immature in the first place.
> Its just fine to me as long as its used to make a point or compare attractiveness ig. In the end of the day those ratings are still subjective.


They are subjective.

Maybe I tend to think of numbers as more objective, which is why it bothers me so much.

You know, we have a unified system of counting (or something) that we all sort of agree on--2+2 is supposed to equal 4. So using them as a way to describe subjective attraction...it feels off to me. Like someone is trying to convince me that their subjective attraction is some kind of standardized universal thing, when it isn't.

But I get that maybe it's helpful for some people.


* *





I prefer to rate people according to my attraction to them on a scale of office supplies. A man I am very attracted to is called a "paperclip" and a man who I don't find attractive is called a "rubber band." You can also use this system to describe what you want to do with them--"I would like to throw that paper clip into the paper clip drawer in case I ever need it for something, though they are generally useless....but it might come in handy one day. But throw the rubber band in the trash." (the trash is someone who's half-way attractive, and more useful on a regular basis.) It's all subjective though. I find it romantic like the number rating--and it also makes me think of how exciting office supplies are!


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

ENFPathetic said:


> It's true. Men cheat because they can. Why does that make you think I believe it's a part of men's nature?


The way you worded the first part focusing only on men made it seem like you argued women dont have the ability to do the same thing. Which they do.





> For most of human history men have been polygamous. When talking about a man's nature, monogamy is not the norm. A lot of women don't know this and to make matters worse they are told lies like men and women are the same when that's just not true.


There are plenty of women in polyamorous relationships today. Ofc men are the ones who displayed that behavior in the past, because men were the protectors since they are stronger and women are physically vulnerable to threats. Its obvious men were the only ones who were free enough to choose the boundaries of relationships.
That is not the case anymore. Physical security in the modern world is mostly provided by society and not by the man of the house. Thats why women are beginning to display those behaviors also, its because they no longer need that security as much as they used to and they are free to do as they please. Does that make it their nature? No, and its not a man's nature alone either. Its a matter of preference and social restrictions/standards. If today it was common for men to be polygamous like it is in some places of the world even today ( ex. muslims) then you would see a whole lot of them being into polygamous relationships since its socially acceptable. This is only a speculation but it seems like back then it was like that also. At the very least the fact that women begin showing interest in polyamory is an indicator that both genders have preferences much more flexible than what we can possibly attach to "nature". 

So yeah dont project that mindset to other men please, its only going to make their issues more complicated. If a guy wants them to accept polyamory its better if he just states he, himself is poly.
Everything else is mere speculation based on ancient social dynamics.



> If you have a partner, you have duty towards them. You provide for them, protect them, support etc. If you have a second partner, you have the same duty towards them as well. You also have to treat them equally. If you buy a gift for one partner, you have buy a gift for the other partner. Basically don't play favourites even if you love one partner more than you love the other.


I agree that respect towards your partner is necessary, as for duty it depends on the nature of the relationship and the rules you as a couple have established. I wouldnt think the same rules apply to any kind of relationship afterall. And well if you are talking about fairness in polyamory here .... im not sure, i personally dont understand the concept that well to have a strong opinion on this one since when i get into a relationship i usually seek depth in the connection which is hard to replace once attained. But i wouldnt mind if agreed to have a threesome or something i guess (ONLY IF the 3rd party is a FEMALE). But by no means that person would be nearly as connected to me as my partner.

I guess it depends on the kind of polyamorous relationship you want. I dont see it as unfair to have a stronger connection with one of them if you are clear about it with the other and let them freely choose to be with someone else too.


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

This reminds me of an old song 🙂


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

WickerDeer said:


> They are subjective.
> 
> Maybe I tend to think of numbers as more objective, which is why it bothers me so much.
> 
> ...


Interesting analogy lmao. Its fine, you can use your own system girl. There is no universal rule to measure subjectivity.


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

SirCanSir said:


> Interesting analogy lmao. Its fine, you can use your own system girl. There is no universal rule to measure subjectivity.


lol Thank you--I feel understood and validated now. How good it is to be able to express subjective values in a way that others can understand.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

WickerDeer said:


> * *
> 
> 
> 
> ...











come get your mans


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

SirCanSir said:


> The way you worded the first part focusing only on men made it seem like you argued women dont have the ability to do the same thing. Which they do.


How can you conclude that I think women can't cheat if I didn't even share my opinion on women's cheating? And why would I share my opinion on women's cheating when the topic is about men? What. I'm not allowed to start a discussion about men unless I make it about women too?



SirCanSir said:


> There are plenty of women in polyamorous relationships today. Ofc men are the ones who displayed that behavior in the past, because men were the protectors since they are stronger and women are physically vulnerable to threats. Its obvious men were the only ones who were free enough to choose the boundaries of relationships.
> That is not the case anymore. Physical security in the modern world is mostly provided by society and not by the man of the house. Thats why women are beginning to display those behaviors also, its because they no longer need that security as much as they used to and they are free to do as they please. Does that make it their nature? No, and its not a man's nature alone either. Its a matter of preference and social restrictions/standards. If today it was common for men to be polygamous like it is in some places of the world even today ( ex. muslims) then you would see a whole lot of them being into polygamous relationships since its socially acceptable. This is only a speculation but it seems like back then it was like that also. At the very least the fact that women begin showing interest in polyamory is an indicator that both genders have preferences much more flexible than what we can possibly attach to "nature".
> 
> So yeah dont project that mindset to other men please, its only going to make their issues more complicated. If a guy wants them to accept polyamory its better if he just states he, himself is poly.
> Everything else is mere speculation based on ancient social dynamics.


Women can try to be polygamous all they want, they're just not built for it.



SirCanSir said:


> I agree that respect towards your partner is necessary, as for duty it depends on the nature of the relationship and the rules you as a couple have established. I wouldnt think the same rules apply to any kind of relationship afterall. And well if you are talking about fairness in polyamory here .... im not sure, i personally dont understand the concept that well to have a strong opinion on this one since when i get into a relationship i usually seek depth in the connection which is hard to replace once attained. But i wouldnt mind if agreed to have a threesome or something i guess (ONLY IF the 3rd party is a FEMALE). But by no means that person would be nearly as connected to me as my partner.
> 
> I guess it depends on the kind of polyamorous relationship you want. I dont see it as unfair to have a stronger connection with one of them if you are clear about it with the other and let them freely choose to be with someone else too.


As a man you are responsible for how you treat your partners, not how you feel about them. There is nothing wrong with having a stronger emotional bond with one partner over another. But there is a lot wrong if you then choose to spend twice as much time and money on the partner you have more feelings for.


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## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)

Sounds more like sexual incompatibility than anything else and this is not restricted to one gender.


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

DOGSOUP said:


> come get your mans


HOT!!!

I want to throw that paperclip in the paperclip box/drawer/wherever-the-fuck-you're-supposed-to-put-them so fast! And just close that baby up and never open it again.


* *





(I'm joking--I actually have an irrational dislike of paperclips...they just get everywhere and I never know what to do with them since I don't use them...they are like my least favorite office supply...can't you just use staples or something--even folding the ears of the page is preferable. I'm just trying to be mean because I'm offended at the number thing.)


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

ENFPathetic said:


> How can you conclude that I think women can't cheat if I didn't even share my opinion on women's cheating? And why would I share my opinion on women's cheating when the topic is about men? What. I'm not allowed to start a discussion about men unless I make it about women too?


You worded it in a way that puts emphasis on Men cheating because they can. I cant know what you think, but this suggested me you were talking about men compared to women because otherwise focusing on something "Men" can do when women can do it also doesnt really seem constructive for your argument. I corrected the fact that the post came out as men being the ones who cheat because of their nature so there are no misunderstandings.





> Women can try to be polygamous all they want, they're just not built for it.


Yeah being stuck with someone's kids puts them at disadvantage there. If they have the same interest for polyamory they can find ways to have it though. But that is besides the point, my argument was that they can display the same interest therefore its not a matter of natural inclination. Their restriction is more about being accepted by someone else after they have kids than being naturally focused on monogamy.





> As a man you are responsible for how you treat your partners, not how you feel about them. There is nothing wrong with having a stronger emotional bond with one partner over another. But there is a lot wrong if you then choose to spend twice as much time and money on the partner you have more feelings for.


Im genuinely lost here, are you talking about a contexts of polyamorous relationships afteral? Why is how much time you spend to each of them a universal rule or something. Are you talking about harems, because that is a rather specific kind of polyamory. Because in a modern polyamory setting women can be with you and be in a relationship without you also if you choose to allow it. So you taking care of all of them is unnecessary. Personally i wouldnt want a relationship like that but it seems fair.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

SirCanSir said:


> You worded it in a way that puts emphasis on Men cheating because they can. I cant know what you think, but this suggested me you were talking about men compared to women because otherwise focusing on something "Men" can do when women can do it also doesnt really seem constructive for your argument. I corrected the fact that the post came out as men being the ones who cheat because of their nature so there are no misunderstandings.


Context man. The title of the thread is "Cheating - *Guys only*". The opening paragraph of the topic is "There's a lot society has to say with regards to cheating. I'm here to clear this up for all the young *men who are confused and suffering as a result of their cheating*."

I did not suggest it to you. You incorrectly inferred it.



SirCanSir said:


> Yeah being stuck with someone's kids puts them at disadvantage there. If they have the same interest for polyamory they can find ways to have it though. But that is besides the point, my argument was that they can display the same interest therefore its not a matter of natural inclination. Their restriction is more about being accepted by someone else after they have kids than being naturally focused on monogamy.


No. They're restrictions are biological. They only have one womb meaning she can only carry one man's children at a time. She gets her cycles, gets pregnant etc. She physically cannot be consistent in her duties with multiple partners. This is before we even get into the fact that men typically will not raise another man's child or even consider such a set up.



SirCanSir said:


> Im genuinely lost here, are you talking about a contexts of polyamorous relationships afteral? Why is how much time you spend to each of them a universal rule or something. Are you talking about harems, because that is a rather specific kind of polyamory. Because in a modern polyamory setting women can be with you and be in a relationship without you also if you choose to allow it. So you taking care of all of them is unnecessary. Personally i wouldnt want a relationship like that but it seems fair.


I don't know what the right technical terms are. But it shouldn't be that complicated to understand. If you spend 2 days a week with one partner, spend 2 days a week with the other partner. If you buy one partner a beachfront property, buy the other a property of equal value. Just be reasonably fair with your time and resources. Don't play favourites and support your partners equally. If you can't do that, stick to one partner.


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

ENFPathetic said:


> Context man. The title of the thread is "Cheating - *Guys only*". The opening paragraph of the topic is "There's a lot society has to say with regards to cheating. I'm here to clear this up for all the young *men who are confused and suffering as a result of their cheating*."
> 
> I did not suggest it to you. You incorrectly inferred it.


I really have no idea why you think that this sentence makes it clear when you justify men cheating - because they can. 

In any case like i said i was making it clear to avoid misunderstandings. 

Lets move on from this now that you ve explained. 





> No. They're restrictions are biological. They only have one womb meaning she can only carry one man's children at a time. She gets her cycles, gets pregnant etc. She physically cannot be consistent in her duties with multiple partners. This is before we even get into the fact that men typically will not raise another man's child or even consider such a set up.


Why does she have to get pregnant with every man she is in relationship with? 
Its true that she is restricted to carry her kids around to different relationships, but she can find ways around that if she makes a proper agreement with the father and the other males. The father can share the burden atleast. 



> I don't know what the right technical terms are. But it shouldn't be that complicated to understand. If you spend 2 days a week with one partner, spend 2 days a week with the other partner. If you buy one partner a beachfront property, buy the other a property of equal value. Just be reasonably fair with your time and resources. Don't play favourites and support your partners equally. If you can't do that, stick to one partner.


Why do i have to buy them property? Why do i have to take care of them financially? I am not interested in a partner who is with me because of financial security in the first place. Arent women fighting for equality and are really close to achieving it in certain countries already? Its their job to be financially independent. And yeah that may be a personal preference of mine, to want someone autonomous who i can respect, but i dont understand why you are proposing men should have to take care of them? There are ways a man can provide for a woman but you seem to hold some really traditional expectations of those services here.


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## Lunacik (Apr 19, 2014)

Lmao, "women aren't built for polyamory coz womb"

This is the kind of thread I'd normally just X out of, but now I'm glad I read. I got a good laugh. What a basic brain.


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## Lunacik (Apr 19, 2014)

SirCanSir said:


> you seem to hold some really traditional expectations of those services here.


Welcome to Turkey, where women are basically inferior and a man's property in their eyes still, lol. Even the ones who come here to the USA still act like that.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

SirCanSir said:


> I really have no idea why you think that this sentence makes it clear when you justify men cheating - because they can.
> 
> In any case like i said i was making it clear to avoid misunderstandings.
> 
> Lets move on from this now that you ve explained.


Because it's literally laying the context for what comes next. If you walk into a shop and it says "men's clothes" on the front, you wouldn't ask why the clothes are tailored for men.

More importantly, I did not justify men cheating. Cheating is bad. The entire point of this topic is to help men who cheat, stop cheating.



SirCanSir said:


> Why does she have to get pregnant with every man she is in relationship with?
> Its true that she is restricted to carry her kids around to different relationships, but she can find ways around that if she makes a proper agreement with the father and the other males. The father can share the burden atleast.


And what are the other guys supposed to do in the mean time? Jack each other off?



SirCanSir said:


> Why do i have to buy them property? Why do i have to take care of them financially? I am not interested in a partner who is with me because of financial security in the first place. Arent women fighting for equality and are really close to achieving it in certain countries already? Its their job to be financially independent. And yeah that may be a personal preference of mine, to want someone autonomous who i can respect, but i dont understand why you are proposing men should have to take care of them? There are ways a man can provide for a woman but you seem to hold some really traditional expectations of those services here.


You have a serious problem with reading comprehension. I'll repost what I said and dumb it down for you.

"*If* you buy one partner a beachfront property, buy the other a property of equal value."

In case you don't know what "*if*" means, I'll use different words. "*In the event that *you buy one partner a beachfront property, buy the other a property of equal value."

Read. Comprehend. Stop wasting my time.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Hexcoder said:


> Lmao, "women aren't built for polyamory coz womb"
> 
> This is the kind of thread I'd normally just X out of, but now I'm glad I read. I got a good laugh. What a basic brain.


I'd say I'm happy you could get a laugh out of it, but you sound salty.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Hexcoder said:


> Welcome to Turkey, where women are basically inferior and a man's property in their eyes still, lol. Even the ones who come here to the USA still act like that.


Sorry to ruin your narrative, but I'm from the UK. I moved to Turkey 6 months ago and know next to nothing about their culture. I'd still wager that I know more than you do.


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## Lunacik (Apr 19, 2014)

ENFPathetic said:


> Sorry to ruin your narrative, but I'm from the UK. I moved to Turkey 6 months ago and know next to nothing about their culture. I'd still wager that I know more than you do.


Good for you, lol. I don't care if you know more. Considering you live there, I certainly hope you would.



ENFPathetic said:


> I'd say I'm happy you could get a laugh out of it, but you sound salty.


No salt, just amused by your Neanderthal level inside-the-box thinking.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Hexcoder said:


> Good for you, lol. I don't care if you know more. Considering you live there, I certainly hope you would.
> 
> 
> No salt, just amused by your Neanderthal level inside-the-box thinking.


I was implying you're talking shit. So much for your intellectual bravado.


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## Lunacik (Apr 19, 2014)

ENFPathetic said:


> I was implying you're talking shit. So much for your intellectual bravado.


Lol, looks like you don't know how to use the word "salty." Funny, since you are salty now.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Hexcoder said:


> Lol, looks like you don't know how to use the word "salty." Funny, since you are salty now.


I feel bad making fun of you when you're this slow. Stop it.


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## Lunacik (Apr 19, 2014)

Juvenile nonsense aside...

I don't understand the whole being offended by numbers thing, personally. I don't really give two shits about it or find it dehumanizing at all. Actually, literally nothing written in this thread offends or bothers me in any way whatsoever. My only thing about it is that it's stupid to think women can't be polyamorous just as easily as men. There is more to polyamory than just being knocked up by a guy, you know.

EDIT:
Okay, I shouldn't say that's the only stupid thing about this thread, it's not--but it's the only one I'm speaking about currently.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Hexcoder said:


> I don't understand the whole being offended by numbers thing, personally. I don't really give two shits about it or find it dehumanizing at all. Actually, literally nothing written in this thread offends or bothers me in any way whatsoever. My only thing about it is that it's stupid to think women can't be polyamorous just as easily as men. There is more to polyamory than just being knocked up by a guy, you know.
> 
> EDIT:
> Okay, I shouldn't say that's the only stupid thing about this thread, it's not--but it's the only one I'm speaking about currently.


Sure you're not bothered. You're just passive-aggressive by default.

Anyway you're making my point. There's more to a relationship than just being knocked up. But once you get knocked up, the only man you're of any use to is the one who's child you're carrying. To the rest, you're a just a burden.


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## Lunacik (Apr 19, 2014)

ENFPathetic said:


> Sure you're not bothered. You're just passive-aggressive by default.
> 
> Anyway you're making my point. There's more to a relationship than just being knocked up. But once you get knocked up, the only man you're of any use to is the one who's child you're carrying. To the rest, you're a just a burden.


I wasn't being passive-aggressive, I was rather directly insulting you, which doesn't require being emotionally stirred.

Damn, you have a really narrow-minded view of everything, not just relationships, don't you?


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

ENFPathetic said:


> Because it's literally laying the context for what comes next. If you walk into a shop and it says "men's clothes" on the front, you wouldn't ask why the clothes are tailored for men.
> 
> More importantly, I did not justify men cheating. Cheating is bad. The entire point of this topic is to help men who cheat, stop cheating.


Ok this is the 3rd time im going to say it and the last one. Your context as you call it is not self explanatory so i corrected it by trying to figure out what you wanted to convey here.

I never argued you approved of cheating, but the method you suggested is basically "focus on yourself, avoid the opposite sex (because its in your nature to cheat and you cant otherwise - thats how it comes across since the way i see it you can just learn some self control or just know what you want), if sex discussion fails, become polyamorous - thats rather a radical solution right there.



> And what are the other guys supposed to do in the mean time? Jack each other off?


Yeah they can do that if they like. Who are you to monitor what others do in their relationships? I already explained there are balanced options if there are proper agreements. If you cant understand that because you dont agree with this kind of female empowerment then thats your issue. I dont give a damn personally.




> You have a serious problem with reading comprehension. I'll repost what I said and dumb it down for you.
> 
> "*If* you buy one partner a beachfront property, buy the other a property of equal value."
> 
> In case you don't know what "*if*" means, I'll use different words. "*In the event that *you buy one partner a beachfront property, buy the other a property of equal value."


No, i already replied to what you are saying here though in the previous post, you are just repeating your initial arguments over and over without trying to bring anything new to the table or explain why you have such specific expectations out of any man and their relationships.
And no, you are wasting MY time because im the only one who actually made some effort to understand your full of contradictions logic regarding the role of a man, his nature and what that entails in relationships.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Hexcoder said:


> I wasn't being passive-aggressive, I was rather directly insulting you, which doesn't require being emotionally stirred.
> 
> Damn, you have a really narrow-minded view of everything, not just relationships, don't you?


Of course. You merely went out of your way to let us know how unbothered you are and how nothing in this thread has upset in anyway shape or form. Ever read Hamlet? "Lady doth protest too much, methinks".


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## Lunacik (Apr 19, 2014)

SirCanSir said:


> And no, you are wasting MY time because im the only one who actually made some effort to understand your full of contradictions logic regarding the role of a man, his nature and what that entails in relationships.


Don't waste your time on this dude tbh. That's why I usually don't reply to these kinds of threads. But yeah, he's a child trying to act like a manly man. Probably just has some little peen complex issues or something.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

SirCanSir said:


> I never argued you approved of cheating,.





SirCanSir said:


> when you justify men cheating


You literally said it. This is unbelievable. If you can't keep track of what you yourself type, then it's not at all surprising that you're struggling to comprehend what I type. Just stop man. Get some sleep, and come back to this when you can at least recall what you wrote and read 5 mins ago.



SirCanSir said:


> Yeah they can do that if they like. Who are you to monitor what others do in their relationships? I already explained there are balanced options if there are proper agreements. If you cant understand that because you dont agree with this kind of female empowerment then thats your issue. I dont give a damn personally.


You sound like a bitch. I'm giving advice to grown adults. They're free to take it or leave it. Stop being a drama queen and acting like I'm forcing this on anyone.



SirCanSir said:


> No, i already replied to what you are saying here though in the previous post, you are just repeating your initial arguments over and over without trying to offer anything new to the table or explain why you have such specific expectations out of any man and their relationships.
> And no, you are wasting MY time because im the only one who actually made some effort to understand your full of contradictions logic regarding the role of a man, his nature and what that entails in relationships.





SirCanSir said:


> Why do i have to buy them property?


This is you. Once again inferring that I'm telling men they *have* to buy property for their partner, even though I clearly said *"if"*.

You seem to be saying a whole lot of nothing for someone who apparently values their time. I'm almost certain I recognise the name and you were not this slow last I remember of you. I must be getting trolled lol.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Hexcoder said:


> Don't waste your time on this dude tbh. That's why I usually don't reply to these kinds of threads. But yeah, he's a child trying to act like a manly man. Probably just has some little peen complex issues or something.


Your valuable contributions will be missed. Have a nice day.


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## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

I dont see this going anywhere. Ill see myself out. If you are trying to support men who have guilty conscience because of the cheating atleast dont spread bs about social roles and focus on something more practical. You did well in point 1 and 3 actually. But after that you got too specific about the role and the behavior that is associated with it.
Whatever you have in mind with that, im tired of trying to understand it.
And i remember you also. You didnt seem to be so old fashioned and close minded back then.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

SirCanSir said:


> I dont see this going anywhere. Ill see myself out. If you are trying to support men who have guilty conscience because of the cheating atleast dont spread bs about social roles and focus on something more practical. You did well in point 1 and 3 actually. But after that you got too specific about the role and the behavior that is associated with it.
> Whatever you have in mind with that, im tired of trying to understand it.
> And i remember you also. You didnt seem to be so old fashioned and close minded back then.


I'm not old fashioned or close minded. You just became a mouth piece for the bat shit crazy new age feminists and lost your ability to comprehend basic English in the process. You'll eventually grow out of it. Have a good one.


----------



## SirCanSir (Mar 21, 2018)

ENFPathetic said:


> I'm not old fashioned or close minded. You just became a mouth piece for the bat shit crazy new age feminists and lost your ability to comprehend basic English in the process. You'll eventually grow out of it. Have a good one.


lmaooo me a feminist? Im trying to be objective bro. I ve already gone through my PUA, red pill phase and it lasted quite a while. I hope you escape yours too. 

Edit: Im not advocating for any radical feminists here. But i ve matured enough to realize red pillers can be just as toxic.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

SirCanSir said:


> lmaooo me a feminist? Im trying to be objective bro. I ve already gone through my PUA, red pill phase and it lasted quite a while. I hope you escape yours too.
> 
> Edit: Im not advocating for any radical feminists here. But i ve matured enough to realize red pillers can be just as toxic.


That's good to know. Maybe you're just tired.

I agree with you on the red pill community.


----------



## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

ENFPathetic said:


> You literally said it. This is unbelievable. If you can't keep track of what you yourself type, then it's not at all surprising that you're struggling to comprehend what I type. Just stop man. Get some sleep, and come back to this when you can at least recall what you wrote and read 5 mins ago.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


You just called someone a bitch.
That's a bit bitchy, don't you think?


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Electra said:


> You just called someone a bitch.
> That's a bit bitchy, don't you think?


Accurate description. That's one song I haven't missed btw.


----------



## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

ENFPathetic said:


> Accurate description. That's one song I haven't missed btw.


You no like?
I got more in store 😉


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Electra said:


> You no like?
> I got more in store 😉


Wow, I should have been happy with the first one. No amount of ass shaking could make up for how bad this song was. I prefer this.


----------



## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

ENFPathetic said:


> Wow, I should have been happy with the first one. No amount of ass shaking could make up for how bad this song was. I prefer this.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Electra said:


>


----------



## passionate (Jan 7, 2017)

clicked out of curiosity aaaaaaa

here's my contribution that no one asked for:
a. cheating bad );
b. cheaters weak Dx
c. loyal lovers >>>>>


----------



## Eren Jaegerbomb (Nov 13, 2015)

Rift said:


> is there such a thing as toxic feminity or is it just supremacy?
> 
> is it toxic to call women smart?


Oh yeah there's toxic women out there too. I don't understand the women who get angry if a guy holds a door open for them.

But splitting the bill is pretty common now, and its out of courtesy too. People know people aren't loaded with money.

Her post is still valid though.


----------



## Eren Jaegerbomb (Nov 13, 2015)

ENFPathetic said:


> And what are the other guys supposed to do in the mean time? Jack each other off?


Dude, it's called _wearing a *condom. *_Or the _woman _takes _*birth control pills.*_

Duh? 🤣


----------



## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

ENFPathetic said:


> Men don't grow out of "being horny". Some get out of shape once their metabolism slows down. For the men who look after themselves, they retain their appetite for sex well into their 60s and 70s.
> 
> I understand that some men can be satisfied by the average woman. But they are the exception and not the rule. The average man has a significantly higher sex drive than the average woman.


Oh, you've got a lot to learn. Trust me, sexual appetites change with age. See if you still feel the same in your 40s and 50s.


----------



## Rift (Mar 12, 2012)

Eren Jaegerbomb said:


> Oh yeah there's toxic women out there too. I don't understand the women who get angry if a guy holds a door open for them.
> 
> But splitting the bill is pretty common now, and its out of courtesy too. People know people aren't loaded with money.
> 
> Her post is still valid though.


didn't say it wasn't valid. just stoking the campfire.

there's still an expectation, tho, for a lad to pay... though it's largely unspoken. But many things are. I had a discussion with someone yesterday in that regard - the strangestness of people that won't list their expectations prior to meeting. But it seems some people are afraid of releasing too much information on some things that may be negotiable. still, it seems odd to me whether one seeks to hook up or simply date to get those things out of the way first. I'd wager most are unaware of what they want.


----------



## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

DOGSOUP said:


>


Somehow I think that Dave Rubin would agree with me here...he is a member of the Dark Enlightenment after all.

Still, memes aren't even humorous. They are the wild gesticulations of a desperate, constipated hyena at that time of the month. How boring and derivative. I was more turned on by Beverly Hills after she suffered a Mexican invasion.


----------



## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

Meliodas said:


> Somehow I think that Dave Rubin would agree with me here...he is a member of the Dark Enlightenment after all.


he made a career out of agreeing with people, you're not special



> desperate, constipated hyena at that time of the month.


NICE I like that


----------



## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

ENFPathetic said:


> Find me the men who look for provision from their women, and I'll show you what an exception to a rule looks like.
> 
> Are you trolling me?


See that's your problem, you look at it like there is a "rule" when it comes to relationships. No definitely not trolling, just laughing at how you've divided everyone up into little boxes to explain cheating. The stereotyping in this thread is just sad. There are millions of "exception to the rule". 

People cheat because they have zero integrity, they don't value their own commitments. It has nothing to do with wealth, fame, or how humans lived as Neanderthals 100k years ago. It's called evolution. It's very very slow. 

Anyway carry on with your dribble about everyone is the same and just a couple people different. lol Good day.


----------



## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)




----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

tanstaafl28 said:


> Oh, you've got a lot to learn. Trust me, sexual appetites change with age. See if you still feel the same in your 40s and 50s.


Irrespective of diet/lifestyle?


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Hokahey said:


> See that's your problem, you look at it like there is a "rule" when it comes to relationships. *No definitely not trolling*, just laughing at how you've divided everyone up into little boxes to explain cheating. The stereotyping in this thread is just sad. There are millions of "exception to the rule".
> 
> People cheat because they have zero integrity, they don't value their own commitments. It has nothing to do with wealth, fame, or how humans lived as Neanderthals 100k years ago. It's called evolution. It's very very slow.
> 
> Anyway carry on with your dribble about everyone is the same and just a couple people different. lol Good day.


I'm not sold. If you are honest about not being a troll, offer me some constructive criticism. Hell, if you have better advice for guys who struggle with cheating, that'd be awesome. Until then I can't honestly see you as anything other than a troll. And that's me giving you the benefit of the doubt, because the alternative is you are dumb as shit.


----------



## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

ENFPathetic said:


> Irrespective of diet/lifestyle?


Diet, lifestyle, age, maturity, all play a role. I'm far more selective now.

I'm far more interested in quality over quantity at this point.


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> There's a lot society has to say with regards to cheating. I'm here to clear this up for all the young men who are confused and suffering as a result of their cheating.
> 
> First, why does a man cheat? Because he can. This is a fact that you just have to accept. As long as you have options, you will have a natural urge to exercise those options. It doesn't matter if you have a 10 at home, you have it in you to sleep with a far less attractive woman with a far less appealing personality no matter how much you love your woman. Refuse to accept this fact and your options will forever dictate whether you cheat or not. Accept this fact, and you can control your options and thus control cheating.
> 
> ...



It may just be the sleep deprivation, but this is the funniest thing I've read so far today 10/10. Hahahaha


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

tanstaafl28 said:


> Diet, lifestyle, age, maturity, all play a role. I'm far more selective now.
> 
> I'm far more interested in quality over quantity at this point.


I mean the slowing of sexual appetite. Does that happen irrespective of one's lifestyle and diet?

I know a few men in their 60s and 70s who very sexually active. I assumed it was because they have excellent eating and exercise habits, but they could just be an exception to the rule I guess.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> It may just be the sleep deprivation, but this is the funniest thing I've read so far today 10/10. Hahahaha


Sleep deprivation or not, glad I could give you a laugh. Come back and share your thoughts.


----------



## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

SirCanSir said:


> lmaooo me a feminist? Im trying to be objective bro. I ve already gone through my PUA, red pill phase and it lasted quite a while. I hope you escape yours too.
> 
> Edit: Im not advocating for any radical feminists here. But i ve matured enough to realize red pillers can be just as toxic.


Woohoo! I'm proud of you for digging yourself out of that hellhole. It's crazy stuff, the circular arguments that all boil down to raging insecurities in the guy so he portrays himself as a victim, even though he's got agency.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Rulers used to have concubines. CEOs and Politicians have mistresses. Celebrities have groupies. The common attractive man has sidebitches. No one bats an eye. Suggest to men who take on multiple women that they should treat those women equally and people get their knickers in a twist. No one can make this shit up.


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> Sleep deprivation or not, glad I could give you a laugh. Come back and share your thoughts.


Off the top of my head? If a guy told me he
wanted to cheat on me "because he could" I would be real tempted to fuck his dad, actually no, scratch that....threesome with both parents to show that's really terrible reasoning. 

There's a lot of things people can do. That doesn't mean we should. Dogs have more self control than a lot of posts on this thread show. Haha

It genuinely is amusing though.


----------



## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

ENFPathetic said:


> I know a few men in their 60s and 70s who very sexually active.


Have you checked? They could be lying


----------



## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> Rulers used to have concubines. CEOs and Politicians have mistresses. Celebrities have groupies. The common attractive man has sidebitches. *No one bats an eye. Suggest to men who take on multiple women that they should treat those women equally and people get their knickers in a twist.* No one can make this shit up.


It's not the equality issue that makes people react. It's the archaic views, including your beliefs that babies result from sexual liasons and that because women only have one womb, they can only have one man. Sure, sometimes accidents happen but if birth control is used properly, 99% of the time, having sex doesn't result in pregnancy. And the one womb issue? OMFG...😂😂😂

Seriously, you sound as naive as a virgin, whether really young or ancient. Or you might be from a developing or undeveloped nation where birth control isn't de rigueur.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> Off the top of my head? If a guy told me he
> wanted to cheat on me "because he could" I would be real tempted to fuck his dad, actually no, scratch that....threesome with both parents to show that's really terrible reasoning.
> 
> There's a lot of things people can do. That doesn't mean we should. Dogs have more self control than a lot of posts on this thread show. Haha
> ...


I like that you how you make it seem like his parents would just go along with it lol.

Well, there's who cheat and don't feel bad about it, and there's men who cheat and feel bad about it. The latter group tend to be men with low self discipline. As long as opportunity presents itself, they will do it, no matter how much it goes against their personal values or how much the guilt eats away at them. It just is what it is.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

DOGSOUP said:


> Have you checked? They could be lying


Maybe. I don't know them to be liars so they naturally retain the benefit of the doubt.


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> I like that you how you make it seem like his parents would just go along with it lol.


By your own argument the dad would because he could, and the mom would be understanding, right? So why not? 



> Well, there's who cheat and don't feel bad about it, and there's men who cheat and feel bad about it. The latter group tend to be men with low self discipline. As long as opportunity presents itself, they will do it, no matter how much it goes against their personal values or how much the guilt eats away at them. It just is what it is.


I wonder if your dad is gonna feel bad about it, or is he more just accepting of his apparent weaknes? Apparently his personal values won't actually matter, right? Haha


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

mia-me said:


> It's not the equality issue that makes people react. It's the archaic views, including your beliefs that babies result from sexual liasons and that because women only have one womb, they can only have one man. Sure, sometimes accidents happen but if birth control is used properly, 99% of the time, having sex doesn't result in pregnancy. And the one womb issue? OMFG...😂😂😂
> 
> Seriously, you sound as naive as a virgin, whether really young or ancient. Or you might be from a developing or undeveloped nation where birth control isn't de rigueur.


Not really. Your point of view is just too narrow. You're basing it on what was it, a liberal coastal us city and your unique lifestyle. And you're arrogant as shit to boot. My viewpoint applies across the board. And even in your own country, most people behave differently to what you think. Get out of your bubble. Travel the world. Expand your horizons. As shocking as it might seem to you, people want kids. They're not the result of a lack of protection, or because the condom broke. They genuinely want kids.


----------



## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> Not really. Your point of view is just too narrow. You're basing it on what was it, a liberal coastal us city and your unique lifestyle. And you're arrogant as shit to boot. My viewpoint applies across the board. And even in your own country, most people behave differently to what you think. Get out of your bubble. Travel the world. Expand your horizons. As shocking as it might seem to you, people want kids. They don't appear becomes the condom broke. They genuinely want kids.


Having traveled more than enough over the years, including other continents, wrong again.

Sure, people want kids but your archaic take on male/female relations is weird.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> By your own argument the dad would because he could, and the mom would be understanding, right? So why not?


Depends. Are you hot?



daleks_exterminate said:


> I wonder if your dad is gonna feel bad about it, or is he more just accepting of his apparent weaknes? Apparently his personal values won't actually matter, right? Haha


Wait we're talking about me now? I don't get jealous like that. I'd probably give you my dad's number if you wanted it.


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> Depends. Are you hot?


I don't mean to brag or anything, but I have once been called a gargoyle faced bitch. 



> Wait we're talking about me now? I don't get jealous like that. I'd probably give you my dad's number if you wanted it.


That's the sleep deprivation again. I didn't mean to say you, but hey why not? We're dating now, but it is only so I can have a threesome with your parents.

Even if they don't find me hot, it's fine the OP says a dude will cheat even with a 10 at home, so the real question is how hot is your mom?


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

mia-me said:


> Having traveled more than enough over the years, including other continents, wrong again.
> 
> Sure, people want kids but your archaic take on male/female relations is weird.


I find it hard to believe. The way you're talking, you sound like you don't know your next door neighbour.

Cool. Your opinion is noted.


----------



## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> I find it hard to believe. The way you're talking, you sound like you don't know your next door neighbour.
> 
> Cool. Your opinion is noted.


lol, they're fine. That said, what's true is that my travel experiences have been primarily developed and developing nations so I'll openly admit to having very limited experiences in undeveloped nations. For the record, I come from a multi-cultural, trilingual family so...

So...admit it, you're naive about male/female relations, right?


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> I don't mean to brag or anything, but I have once been called a gargoyle faced bitch.


One man's gargoyle is another man's mona lisa.



daleks_exterminate said:


> That's the sleep deprivation again. I didn't mean to say you, but hey why not? We're dating now, but it is only so I can have a threesome with your parents.
> 
> Even if they don't find me hot, it's fine the OP says a dude will cheat even with a 10 at home, so the real question is how hot is your mom?


I didn't say anything about giving you my mum's number. You leave her out of this!


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> One man's gargoyle is another man's mona lisa.


Haha well the smirks gonna be from hooking up with your mom



> I didn't say anything about giving you my mum's number. You leave her out of this!


Ah, so she is hot? How hot like 6 range or is she like a 9/10? Do I need to brush up on negging to get her, or is she more like the gentle seduction type? 


....god I need to sleep this is getting out of hand 😆


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

mia-me said:


> lol, they're fine. That said, what's true is that my travel experiences have been primarily developed and developing nations so I'll openly admit to having very limited experiences in undeveloped nations. For the record, I come from a multi-cultural, trilingual family so...
> 
> So...admit it, you're naive about male/female relations, right?


I guess some people can travel blind because the relationships I've spoken on are common place everywhere. And in case you're yet to pinpoint your arrogance, the majority of the world is underdeveloped.

I'm 34 years old. I've had countless relationships with women from all walks of life. I'm anything but naive.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> Haha well the smirks gonna be from hooking up with your mom
> 
> 
> Ah, so she is hot? How hot like 6 range or is she like a 9/10? Do I need to brush up on negging to get her, or is she more like the gentle seduction type?
> ...


Wow. Did you just ask me to rate my mum?? LMAO


----------



## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> I guess some people can travel blind because the relationships I've spoken on are common place everywhere. And in case you're yet to pinpoint your arrogance, the majority of the world is underdeveloped.


I'd be shocked if the majority of people on PerC are from undeveloped nations so, preaching undeveloped nation philosophy isn't really relevant.



> I'm 34 years old. I've had countless relationships with women from all walks of life. I'm anything but naive.


Sure, sure. And with that, I'll laughingly see myself out of this thread. 😄


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> Wow. Did you just ask me to rate my mum?? LMAO


Sure did! The whole premise of this thread is basically that you think that men want to fuck anyone and will always cheat regardless of attractiveness and standards, right? So....are you saying you've never considered it? Apparently it would probably go against your morals or whatever, but you'd still do it, by your own reasoning that I'm now twisting for my own amusement. So, please, go on, I need a number to work with. Haha


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

mia-me said:


> I'd be shocked if the majority of people on PerC are from undeveloped nations so, preaching undeveloped nation philosophy isn't really relevant.


There is no such thing as underdeveloped nation philosophy. This is how arrogance undermines you. It puts your ignorance on display.



mia-me said:


> Sure, sure. And with that, I'll laughingly see myself out of this thread. 😄


You may be an arrogant bitch, but it's hilarious how seriously you take yourself. I enjoy most of our conversations. See you later.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> Sure did! The whole premise of this thread is basically that you think that men want to fuck anyone and will always cheat regardless of attractiveness and standards, right? So....are you saying you've never considered it? Apparently it would probably go against your morals or whatever, but you'd still do it, by your own reasoning that I'm now twisting for my own amusement. So, please, go on, I need a number to work with. Haha


No no no no. My advice is for men who struggle to keep it in their pants. You're a whole different breed. I'm sorry to say but I don't think anything can help you. At this point I'm questioning whether you're even wearing pants to begin with.


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> No no no no. My advice is for men who struggle to keep it in their pants.


I don't think "be openly poly if you're not monogamous" is bad advice. I just wonder where people are supposed to find the time. Relationships take time, and at least some effort and such and those aren't infinate resources. Some people do find the time, so good for them if that's what they want. A set up where just the dude gets to hookup and the girl is supposed to what be faithful seems laughable, but if both people want that sure. It wouldn't be for me.



> You're a whole different breed. I'm sorry to say but I don't anything can help you.
> At this point I'm questioning whether you're even wearing pants to begin with.


Thank you, that's the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> I don't think "be openly poly if you're not monogamous" is bad advice. I just wonder where people are supposed to find the time. Relationships take time, and at least some effort and such and those aren't infinate resources. Some people do find the time, so good for them if that's what they want. A set up where just the dude gets to hookup and the girl is supposed to what be faithful seems laughable, but if both people want that sure. It wouldn't be for me.


At the end of the day, relationships are negotiated. Weigh up your options and make the best deal you can. Who cares if other people find it laughable. It's just their opinion.



daleks_exterminate said:


> Thank you, that's the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me.


As an old fashioned gentleman, I keep it classy.


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> At the end of the day, relationships are negotiated. Weigh up your options and make the best deal you can. Who cares if other people find it laughable. It's just their opinion.


I have been married for about 5 (6?) Idk years (I'm bad at time, alright). We were good friends first for about a year. The thought of him cheating is funny for many reasons, first of all that he'd have to talk to people he didn't want to. He's an intp who hates people. He's great and super hot, he probably could if he wanted to, but there's no way in hell he'd want to start multiple relationships.... I have to invite his friends over for him to hangout with them haha 

And now as of today I guess due to this thread, I'm dating you, but that's purely to get with your parents so I think he'll understand. It's pretty rude of you to keep your mom from me like this. Thought you called yourself a gentleman. You won't even tell me if she's hot or not! 

I too am basically a classy gentleman. I like cigars and scotch .


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> I have been married for about 5 (6?) Idk years (I'm bad at time, alright). We were good friends first for about a year. The thought of him cheating is funny for many reasons, first of all that he'd have to talk to people he didn't want to. He's an intp who hates people. He's great and super hot, he probably could if he wanted to, but there's no way in hell he'd want to start multiple relationships.... I have to invite his friends over for him to hangout with them haha
> 
> And now as of today I guess due to this thread, I'm dating you, but that's purely to get with your parents so I think he'll understand. It's pretty rude of you to keep your mom from me like this. Thought you called yourself a gentleman. You won't even tell me if she's hot or not!
> 
> I too am basically a classy gentleman. I like cigars and scotch .


Lol. Only a fraction of men struggle to keep it in their pants like that. I never wanted anyone to start doubting their partners.

This level of perversion is beyond anything I've ever encountered. Please control yourself. She is not on the menu!


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> Lol. Only a fraction of men struggle to keep it in their pants like that. I never wanted anyone to start doubting their partners.
> 
> This level of perversion is beyond anything I've ever encountered. Please control yourself. She is not on the menu!


Oh, I wasn't, but if this thread can make someone doubt their partner, that's probably not a bad thing. Because there are probably some other issues present if so.

Also why is it fine when it's your dad but mums not available? Rude.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> Oh, I wasn't, but if this thread can make someone doubt their partner, that's probably not a bad thing. Because there are probably some other issues present if so.
> 
> Also why is it fine when it's your dad but mums not available? Rude.


Well if there are issues, then the issues are the reason for the doubt. But if someone reads this thread and thinks their partner is cheating because of what they read in this thread then that's a problem. Of course it would be the reader's fault for reading without first learning how to properly read, but I'd still feel bad about it.

She's not into women. Leave her alone.


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> Well if there are issues, then the issues are the reason for the doubt. But if someone reads this thread and thinks their partner is cheating because of what they read in this thread then that's a problem. Of course it would be the reader's fault for reading without first learning how to properly read, but I'd still feel bad about it.
> 
> She's not into women. Leave her alone.


I don't really think you have to worry about that.


----------



## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

daleks_exterminate said:


> I don't really think you have to worry about that.


Lmao. Did you change your profile or did I just not notice the creepy looking old dude before.

Btw, I think mistakes were made. You can have her number. Just remember to delete my dad's. He's not into guys.


----------



## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

ENFPathetic said:


> Lmao. Did you change your profile or did I just not notice the creepy looking old dude before.
> 
> Btw, I think mistakes were made. You can have her number. Just remember to delete my dad's. He's not into guys.


Personally, I think Palpatine is the height of beauty. No such luck, though. I'm seducing them both through the tale of Darth Plagius the wise.


----------



## TheWarChief - ENXP (Apr 9, 2021)

daleks_exterminate said:


> Personally, I think Palpatine is the height of beauty. No such luck, though. I'm seducing them both through the tale of Darth Plagius the wise.


I have been scanning this thread with some bemusement - Star Wars reference? Not Dr Who? LOL not The Master from Deadly Assassin...?


----------



## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)




----------



## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

ENFPathetic said:


> I'm not sold. If you are honest about not being a troll, offer me some constructive criticism. Hell, if you have better advice for guys who struggle with cheating, that'd be awesome. Until then I can't honestly see you as anything other than a troll. And that's me giving you the benefit of the doubt, because the alternative is you are dumb as shit.


The problem stems from the 1st comment in this thread after yours. That post sums it all up. You say "struggle with cheating" like it's a disease that needs to be some quest to cure. No, and your generalizations about men being "bread winners" is just a sad reflection of what society wants you to believe is the "only way" to live life. It's not, women are just as capable in this world to provide for the families. 

lol, name calling and mud slinging, yep already know I won this discussion. Good luck. HAHA


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## dirt. (4 mo ago)

Dalien said:


> So perhaps you should quote @ENFPathetic and tell him just that.


Well I was originally referring to him, but then you felt the need to jump in and defend him, so now I'm talking to you. ^_^


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## Dalien (Jul 21, 2010)

dirt. said:


> Well I was originally referring to him, but then you felt the need to jump in and defend him, so now I'm talking to you. ^_^


 I read each post as it developed to see where it was going—it’s called watching—were people going to take the OP writer as incel or what the OP wrote as that and it was a mix of both until further down the line where it was talked about creating the understanding that the OP writer wasn’t an incel. What better way to learn about it by talking about it. Your post: 


dirt. said:


> Why anyone is indulging this incel is beyond me. lol


…most definitely, did call the writer of the OP an incel. Hence my questioning you.

I‘ll make my answer to your question short and sweet—no, I don’t agree with the OP. I respect the writer of it for wanting to speak of an issue that is a very problematic one.


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## dirt. (4 mo ago)

Dalien said:


> I read each post as it developed to see where it was going—it’s called watching—were people going to take the OP writer as incel or what the OP wrote as that and it was a mix of both until further down the line where it was talked about creating the understanding that the OP writer wasn’t an incel. What better way to learn about it by talking about it.


Are we not doing that?



Dalien said:


> …most definitely, did call the writer of the OP an incel. Hence my questioning you.


Questioning is fair, but do you really find it that surprising or offensive that someone would dare espouse their opinion on a monologue aired in a public arena where people are meant to respond, without reading all 225 other responses to it? lol I mean, you seem kind of up-in-arms about it, which is odd. Even now you're taking jabs like ¨it's called watching¨, as if you need to put me in my place for not sharing your opinion on the OP. It's all a bit overly personal.
I mean, you could argue that you're some tireless guardian of interpersonal integrity, but you were more than happy to indulge ENTJudgement, when he, funnily enough... judged me. He saw one single sentence, and without bothering to look into any of my other post history, deemed me disingenuous, unintelligent, and not worth engaging with. Yet you saw no problem with this, even encouraged it. In contrast to your offense at my judging someone for an entire diatribe. So clearly your stake in this is not about integrity in how we judge eachother and the thoroughness of our investigation before forming an opinion. I would assume it's either a personal stake in the OP or a personal stake in the word ¨incel¨, but I have no way of knowing.



Dalien said:


> I‘ll make my answer to your question short and sweet—no, I don’t agree with the OP. I respect the writer of it for wanting to speak of an issue that is a very problematic one.


What question?


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## dirt. (4 mo ago)

You'll be pleased to know I've now read several more pages. More convinced than ever that this guy is an incel. hahaha


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## dirt. (4 mo ago)

Like, holy shit, dude. He's such a fucking incel that I'm starting to wonder if you're trolling me by saying that I'm making wild assumptions and need to read the whole thread. My god, it just gets worse and worse with every page. If you are trolling me, kudos, you really had me going.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

What the fuck is going on?


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## Dalien (Jul 21, 2010)

ENFPathetic said:


> What the fuck is going on?


@dirt. Thinks you’re an incel and I know you’re not.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

Dalien said:


> @dirt. Thinks you’re an incel and I know you’re not.


Ok. Thanks for explaining. He should have just quoted me or sent me a message. Or maybe he did, and I missed it. I'll go back and address him directly.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

dirt. said:


> Why anyone is indulging this incel is beyond me. lol


I'm not an incel. An incel is a guy who wants to fuck women but can't. This topic is for guys who don't want to fuck women(outside of their relationship), but struggle with the temptation to cheat. That's the opposite of an incel.

I forgot about this topic. I remember when I made it. I had such good intentions. I wish someone had told me this shit when I was out here hating myself for constantly making the same mistake over and over again(cheating on women I loved). I spent so much time judging myself and not enough time coming up with practical solutions to my problem. A problem shared by many guys around the world, none of which by definition can be incels if you don't mind me reiterating one last time.

I don't believe everything I believed when I wrote this topic. For one, when I wrote this topic, I thought this struggle was way more widespread than it actually is. I thought almost every guy was like me in this respect. I don't believe that to be the case anymore. I think the reason I believed it to be true in the first place is because most guys I personally knew were like that and that's because birds of a feather flock tend to together and all that.

Having said all that. Why you gotta be so dismissive of incels? Shit, they probably need kindness and consideration more than most.


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## 98403942 (Feb 10, 2021)

ENFPathetic said:


> I'm not an incel. An incel is a guy who wants to fuck women but can't. This topic is for guys who don't want to fuck women(outside of their relationship), but struggle with the temptation to cheat. That's the opposite of an incel.
> 
> I forgot about this topic. I remember when I made it. I had such good intentions. I wish someone had told me this shit when I was out here hating myself for constantly making the same mistake over and over again(cheating on women I loved). I spent so much time judging myself and not enough time coming up with practical solutions to my problem. A problem shared by many guys around the world, none of which by definition can be incels if you don't mind me reiterating one last time.
> 
> ...


Dirt's name is very true to the quality of their posts. Just stirring shit and name-calling to trigger people into response. I hope mom and dad were too busy working that caused this.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

MH17 said:


> Dirt's name is very true to the quality of their posts. Just stirring shit and name-calling to trigger people into response. I hope mom and dad were too busy working that caused this.


He's probably a cool guy. Just got triggered and lost his head. Happens to the best of us.


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## EverestEaston (2 mo ago)

I think sex drive is a powerful drive second to survival. In fact, sex drive is a specie survival drive. We can’t deny that. Men need to spread seeds. Women need to carry the best genes. It is the same need of eating and feeding our off springs. Not saying we are to reduce ourselves to animals. Even though human are capable of moral choices, we cannot separate ourselves from our primal drive. It’s like we can fast for discipline but it is impossible to eliminate our needs to eat. If we don’t have these needs, there will be no moral conflict thus moral choice.


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