# Type me please. Am I or am I not an ISTJ?



## jamaix (Sep 20, 2013)

Kiriae said:


> The difference between ISTJ and INTP you mentioned are differences between Si dom vs Si ter and Ne aux vs Ne inf (ISTJ: Si Te Fi Ne, INTP: Ti Ne Si Fe) so it doesn't say you are surely ISTJ, it just indicates you are Si ... ... Ne.
> You can as well be ISFJ (Si Fe Ti Ne) and I believe it is the case. I see Si and Fe in you and... I am being subjective here but you sound like introverted version of my aunt which types as ESFJ (Fe Si Ne Ti).
> ISFJ is also a type in between ISTJ and INTP. It shares dominant and inferior functions of ISTJ and has the same functions as INTP, just in different order.
> You also say you developed "thinking" habits at some point of life which indicates tertiary Ti development in ISFJ. Were you about 16-30 when that change happened?
> ...


I've never tested ISFJ but I did check out the links you provided. They sound very similar to ISTJs

The ISFJ qualities listed below are either not true or only sort of true about me. Some of these traits are also listed as ISTJ characteristics.

Not true

Has an extremely well-developed sense of space, function, and aesthetic appeal.
They make extremely good interior decorators.
Excellent organizational capabilities.


Only sort of true (both have to do with feelings)


 likely to be very sensitive to other people's feelings (It is very important to me to be sensitive to others feelings, but I rely heavily upon cues to figure this out, body language, tone of voice, eyes, composure, known history, etc.) I don't always realize instinctively that something will be taken the wrong way, but I do work very hard to watch for signs that I am on the wrong track. This is much harder when talking to someone on the phone, on-line, or that I've had limited previous exposure to.
Extremely aware of their own internal feelings. Yes and no, but I don't trust my feelings. I literally have to ask myself how should I feel about this, is it appropriate to be upset, am I overreacting, did I misunderstand, am I in possession of all the pertinent information, is this how I would want them to react if the roles were reversed, etc. This process often causes a delay in response, and can make me appear unfeeling and robotic to someone who is expecting an immediate reaction. But, I would rather do this than react immediately, then have to work to repair hurt feelings due to an inappropriate response.

When I read the description of ISFJ that you linked, this line jumped out at me. *They love to observe people's reactions and emotions in situations*
I read this after I had already made this comment #12 (2nd paragraph) I often refer to myself as a people watcher. I enjoy studying people, observing their reactions and responses. It aids me in my efforts to understand people better.

Of the types I seriously considered, ISTJ, ISTP, ISFJ and ISFP, I would have to say that ISFJ and ISTJ descriptions seem to fit the best. Although both types are described as having excellent organizational skills, and this is definitely not true of me.


Thanks for your suggestion and the links. I'll have to think about this one for a bit.


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## Kiriae (Oct 2, 2015)

jamaix said:


> Although both types are described as having excellent organizational skills, and this is definitely not true of me.


It's my interpretation but I believe ISTJ will be more "organized" than ISFJ due to Si-Te pair. They remember what was(Si) and make proper system out of it(Te), visibly outside. 
ISFJ uses Si-Ti, pretty much like INTP. They remember what was (Si) but instead of making a working system out of it they focus on understanding the what and why(Ti). 
ISTJs want everything to have its own place in the external world. 
ISFJs are content as long as they personally know where everything is, everything has its place in their mind but not necessarily in the outside world. 
Both have excellent memories and are not scatterbrained too so they don't make as much mess as some types (INTP with their aux Ne and 100 ideas per second...).


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Hello @jamaix!  Well from what you have written so far I think ISTJ is still a good option for you. How about I ask you some other questions and see where those answers lead us to: 

How sentimental and nostalgic are you? Do you have a hard time letting go of many items because they hold special memories for you? Or are you more about novelty and for example like getting new stuff to put in your bedroom?

Do you create artwork/write a novel for others or yourself?

Do you care more about maintaining group harmony and generally follow the group's values or follow you're OWN strict moral code and all hell breaks lose if someone violates a value of yours? (However, a Fi user can resemble a Fe user if one of their values is group harmony)

Do you empathize by feeling/absorbing the person's raw emotions or putting yourself in their shoes first?

Are your values objective or subjective? Could you provide an example for how your value/s are either objective or subjective? 

The intuition functions: 

Ni is about being able to see subconscious patterns and symbols. It analyzes the past, but then looks far out into the future. It is not sentimental or nostalgic like Si. It looks for the deeper symbols and patterns. Ni finds one idea and builds on it over time. Ni users talk streamlined/one thing at a time. Ni is linear. On the other hand, Ne is about possibilities, more so several possibilities at once, the "what could be and what if's." It looks for broad shallow patterns and symbols. Ne users tend to talk about possibilities and sound random. Ne is non-linear. Ni and Ne are both abstract. 

The sensing functions: 

Se and Si are both sensing functions. So both want/use concrete-empirically experienced data. Se wants to live in the right now. When playing a video game you have played before Se just thinks about that moment. It doesn't think "Oh how did I win this game last time?" like a Si user would. Se doesn't care about all the joy you got from playing that same game before. What matters is RIGHT NOW. It wants to discover as it goes. It's good at improvising. It doesn't think about the past or future, just right now. A Se user sees a bird. All they think is "Wow, a bird." They are the adrenaline junkies-race car drivers. Se wants to go on adventures, be reckless, and impulsive. Se is not scared of trying anything new. Think Harry Potter-either ISFP or ISTP. 

Si on the other hand, looks to the past when dealing with the present. It is about the tried and true method. So if I get into a fight with someone I'll think how did I win this fight last time? And use the same methods. It is about getting the same joy from something over and over/reliving emotions. I feel all those past feelings/emotions/memories when I play Kingdom Hearts over and over again. I generally stick to same gaming methods. When I look at a picture of a bird, I think of my own bird. I think wow he looks like my bird, he has the same grumpy, bossy, look on his face. Si gets scared about new things. Think of Hermione Granger- either ESTJ or ISTJ. 

So just how spontaneous and impulsive are you? Do you want to live in the right now? and are a thrill seeker? Do you want immediate gratification? Do you like to just discover as you go without a plan? Are you good at improvising? Do you seek adventures? Do you seek freedom and avoid commitments/routine? 

Or do you like to stick to proven methods and compare present situations to the past? Do you like to have a plan? You are not impulsive and probably wouldn't do so good at improvising? Do you think adventures are ok on TV but not so much for me? How sentimental are you? Do you like everything your room to have it's own place? Do you like routine and have no problem with commitments?

Are you 1. or 2.? (from Robert2928's example)

1.“Wow that girl hugged me so she must like me…wait isn’t this what happened on (insert TV show here)? Oh she doesn’t like me after all”

2. “Wow that girl hugged me so she must like me…then again (insert other girl name here) hugged me and she didn’t like me so maybe I’m wrong”

In math class, in order to understand the problem, do you need the general idea or examples?

If I showed you a picture of a bird what would you say to describe it? 

Difference between Fe and Te:

"Oprah is a Fe-dom (likely ESFJ-Fe-Ti, though she’s typed ENFJ a lot online). I tried to find the James Frey original interview with Oprah where she really nailed him (as she puts it, she was attacking him not only for herself, but “the millions of people who read your book and thought it was real”) but I can’t seem to locate it. Boo. But here’s a quick clip with Lindsay Lohan where she lays down the Fe. Basically, cut your BS, get your act together, etc. But it also comes with Fe: you’re better than this, I know you can do it, you have a good heart." 






Oprah's is famous for relating to the audience. She just naturally wants to unite people. She relies on objective values- group values. Like in her weight loss commercial she naturally just touches people’s hearts. She just naturally talks for other people. She says "Inside EVERY woman" She's talking for everyone, and relating to everyone- Fe. Fe users naturally use words like "You and We." Fi users tend to say "I and Me."






"Dr. Phil is an ESTJ-Te-Fi. If you want classic hard-knocks Te-telling-people-off, go watch some of his interview clips on YouTube. This one is the first one I ran across, and it’s hilarious how he responds… total Te. THESE ARE THE FACTS. Here is another clip where he asserts just who is boss, whose show it is, what they are going to talk about, and where he stands with a guest."

Couldn't find the video for Dr. Phil. But when I watch his shows, he almost always says "Well, then do something about it!!!"- very Te. "These are the FACTS" and the he shows a bullet point list of the facts (statistics, etc.)- very Te. He relies on objective truth- the facts. Or he just says straight up "I think you're a liar and full of crap." See, he doesn't care about group harmony or group values. Or he finds loopholes in peoples stories, to make the FACTS clear. He wants things to make logical sense. His #1 goal is to bring the FACTS to the surface for everyone to see. He wants immediate results and to organize the objective truth. As for Fi, he has the abuser go through the same abuse he does to others. Like for example, he made a step-dad carry around heavy of weights to make him realize "how much weight his step-son feels from all of the verbal abuse he's received over the years (from the step-dad)." Dr. Phil wanted to put the step-dad in the kids shoes- Fi.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

@jamaix 

*This site describes all of the functions really well:*

Have you ever explained cognitive functions? If... - Confessions of a Myers Briggs-aholic

*Difference between Ni and Si:*

http://funkymbtifiction.tumblr.com/post/119394231790/ni-vs-si

Ni and Te are linear.
Ti and Ne are non-linear. 

*Also, Ni and Si are similar.* They both have an abstract quality to them. They are both introverted perceiving functions. Both are connected to memory and experience. They both create archetypes. Ni- conceptual archetypes. Si- physical archetypes. Both have a hard time dealing with things they haven’t dealt with before. Both have an attitude about taking short cuts “Oh, I’ve seen this before. This is the answer. " They don’t need to think through the specific details to know what’s going to happen, since they’ve already seen it before. Both look to the past to help them figure out new situations. But Si is concrete. Ni is conceptual. Si is detailed oriented. Ni doesn't care too much about the details, it just wants the general idea. 

*Biggest difference: Si is about concrete experiences. Ni is about conceptual experiences.*

*For Example:*

(from Robert2928's example)

conceptual experience- 1.“Wow that girl hugged me so she must like me…wait isn’t this what happened on (insert tv show here)? Oh she doesn’t like me afterall”

concrete experience- 2. What has personally happened. “Wow that girl hugged me so she must like me…then again (insert other girl name here) hugged me and she didn’t like me so maybe I’m wrong”

In math class, to understand the problem, do you need the general idea-conceptual thinking or examples-concrete thinking?

*The feeling functions* (Remember a Fi user can resemble a Fe user if one of their values is group harmony):

Random Thoughts on Fi vs Fe - Funky MBTI in Fiction

Fi or Fe? - Funky MBTI in Fiction

https://noticethemoonstone.wordpress.com/2015/04/12/cognitive-functions-fi-vs-fe/

Myers & Briggs â€¢ Fe vs Fi


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## jamaix (Sep 20, 2013)

@Kitty23

Thank you for taking the time to post all of this. Barring anything unforeseen, I will sit down tonight and answer the questions and watch the videos. 

Thank You!


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## jamaix (Sep 20, 2013)

@_Kitty23_

How sentimental and nostalgic are you? Do you have a hard time letting go of many items because they hold special memories for you? Or are you more about novelty and for example like getting new stuff to put in your bedroom? 
I'm really not sentimental or nostalgic. I seldom get attached to anything other than people (and only those in my immediate circle). Possessions, knick knacks, memorabilia, etc., mean very little to me. I'm really not into buying anything for my home that doesn't serve a functional purpose. I love buying plants, flowers, trees, etc., but furnishings and such mean very little to me.

Do you create artwork/write a novel for others or yourself? No, I don't. Unless you count written messages that get rather lengthy at times. 

Do you care more about maintaining group harmony and generally follow the group's values or follow you're OWN strict moral code and all hell breaks lose if someone violates a value of yours? (However, a Fi user can resemble a Fe user if one of their values is group harmony)
I won't violate my core values, but I will avoid stirring up conflict if at all possible. Basically, if they leave me alone, I will leave them alone. Of course if they are hurting someone, that is different. I definitely will not follow a group that violates my core values, if possible I will quietly disengage from the group and go my own way.

Do you empathize by feeling/absorbing the person's raw emotions or putting yourself in their shoes first?
Not completely sure how to answer this.
If someone is screaming and hollering and it seems to be directed at me, it definitely affects me. When I was a teenager I came right back at them, now that I'm older I usually just ask them not to holler at me. I am a bit sensitive to being hollered at, especially since I don't believe it is at all necessary. If it is obvious that they are just frustrated about a situation and it has nothing to do with me, I will try to put myself in their shoes.


Are your values objective or subjective? Could you provide an example for how your value/s are either objective or subjective?
I guess you could say mostly objective. For example I believe stealing is always wrong. However, that doesn't mean that if someone steals a loaf of bread for their starving children that I wouldn't extend mercy and pardon them.


So just how spontaneous and impulsive are you? 
I'm not particularly spontaneous or impulsive. I usually need a bit of time to think about things that are new or different before I'm willing to try them. That doesn't mean I won't, it just means I need time to get use to the idea.

Do you want to live in the right now? 
I mostly live for now, with minor consideration to things that will cause problems if not taken care of in advance. I won't for example neglect to purchase airline tickets 3 to 4 weeks in advance of a trip. I hate paying more than I have to, and waiting means the price will usually be higher. Will I plan every day of my vacation in advance? No, sometimes I just like to meander and take things as they come.

Am I a thrill seeker? 
No, not at all. I tend to think of all the potential problems that may occur if I engage in risky thrill seeking activities.

Do you want immediate gratification? 
I am usually content to wait.

Do you like to just discover as you go without a plan?
Yes, most of the time but it does depend upon the circumstances.

Are you good at improvising? 
It really depends upon the circumstances. When it comes to saving money I am. When it comes to interior decorating, social activities, etc. no.

Do you seek adventures? 
Not really. I prefer to stick with the familar most of the time. I can be convinced to try new things, but it cannot be sprung on me unexpectedly.

Do you seek freedom and avoid commitments/routine? 
I definitely avoid commitments, and like the freedom to do what I want when I want. However, I do tend to have some basic routines that I follow every day. 

Or do you like to stick to proven methods and compare present situations to the past?
I prefer proven methods and I do look for answers based upon what has happened in the past.

Do you like to have a plan? You are not impulsive and probably wouldn't do so good at improvising?
This is heavily dependent upon how important something is. For the most part I don't plan much in advance. I like the freedom to figure it out as I go along.

Do you think adventures are ok on TV but not so much for me? 
Depends upon if there is danger involved. If it is dangerous, it's fine for TV but not for me.

How sentimental are you? Do you like everything your room to have it's own place? 
Not at all sentimental. I don't care if everything is in its place. In fact I don't know what everything being in its place would even mean for me. As long as it has a semblance of order, is clean, and I can find what I need I don't mind.

Do you like routine and have no problem with commitments?
I avoid commitments if at all possible. I follow some basic routines but I like the freedom to take things as they come.

Are you 1. or 2.? (from Robert2928's example)  

I don't know what Robert2928 is? but I would say probably #2

2. “Wow that girl hugged me so she must like me…then again (insert other girl name here) hugged me and she didn’t like me so maybe I’m wrong”

In math class, in order to understand the problem, do you need the general idea or examples? 
 
Examples

If I showed you a picture of a bird what would you say to describe it? 

I would probably give details that included information about size and colors.



I still need to watch the videos, I got started on this a bit late.
I hope my answers make sense and that I understood the questions correctly.


Thank you!


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## floatingpoint (Dec 30, 2015)

Hi I'm not an expert on typology by any means, but I just wanted to let you know that you seem very ISFJ to me. I know the fit isn't quite perfect, especially with all the organization stuff, but to me it's less about the specific stereotypes and more about the main idea. What you said about being a mom really got to me, especially about your selflessness and about how your kids' happiness makes you happy. That seems very Fe to me. And you seem to understand pretty well that you're like Si dom. 

That said, telling between an ISFJ and a ISTJ is really tough. Good luck


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

> I'm really not sentimental or nostalgic. I seldom get attached to anything other than people. Possessions, knick knacks, memorabilia, etc., mean very little to me. I'm really not into buying anything for my home that doesn't serve a functional purpose. I love buying plants, flowers, trees, etc., but furnishings and such mean very little to me.


I am sentimental and a bit nostalgic. I get attached to items, but not so much people. Yes, I like functional purpose too. Maybe since you get attached to people you are an ISFJ? 

Everything has it's place in my room. If someone moves something I'm like "Nooo!" lol. This is partly because of Si- Each piece in my room represents a special time in my life, so move the piece...and now your messing up the memory. When I look at the piece all those emotions/feelings and details from the memories come pouring into my mind, even the memory of me placing that item in that exact spot. And my Te likes external organization. Donating items can be very hard for me because my Si says "But this item is practical. Plus, it holds special memory for you. And by donating this item you are saying goodbye to the special memory it is attached to." Then my Fi says "And that is just wrong!" And then my Ne says "But what if you ever do go to a mountain? You'll need these mountain boots" I'll generate several what if scenarios to rationalize why I need to keep something.



> I won't violate my core values, but I will avoid stirring up conflict if at all possible. Basically, if they leave me alone, I will leave them alone. Of course if they are hurting someone, that is different. I definitely will not follow a group that violates my core values, if possible I will quietly disengage from the group and go my own way.


Well, Fe and Fi users can have the same values. But it's where they come from that makes the difference. Are your values objective or subjective? Do your values come from external sources or internal sources? Do you have values that you absolutely know 100% will never waver? Are you more about morals or values? Are you more EVERYONE deserves to be treated equally? Or do you treat people more so on a case by case basis? Are your values broad or narrow? For example, A person's mother dies of cancer. This person then creates a charity for cancer patients. (Fi)-narrow focus where person was impacted by cancer......A person wants to end world hunger (Fe)- broad focus, where the person absorbs others raw pain first, never been starving themselves.

Fe- wants to end slavery because they absorb the slaves emotions of pain and suffering. It's not based on ethics. It's based on feeling others emotions. 

Fi- wants to end slavery because slavery goes against their values. Slavery is simply "wrong." They use a moral code. 

Fe- is against adultery because it will hurt my loved ones. They feel the pain their going to cause to others. 

Fi- is against adultery because it goes against their moral code. Their heart says "This is wrong." 

Both Fi and Fe are very empathetic, but approach empathy in two different ways. They both feel other's suffering but their tactics are different. Fi user's put themselves in those person's shoes. When empathizing a Fi user will relate by speaking of their own similar struggle. Fe users absorb the person's raw emotions. When empathizing the Fe user will say "Oh no," and "Aww." 

Fe one big motivation= feeling/absorbing other's emotions
Fi one big motivation= following their own ethics



> I guess you could say mostly objective. For example I believe stealing is always wrong. However, that doesn't mean that if someone steals a loaf of bread for their starving children that I wouldn't extend mercy and pardon them.


Objective values= Fe. Subjective values= Fi. Why are you empathic towards the starving child? because of one your external values says you should empathize for him or subjective values? Do you feel that child's raw pain first? Or do you put yourself in his/her shoes? Again, I am thinking maybe ISFJ for you.



> I'm not particularly spontaneous or impulsive. I usually need a bit of time to think about things that are new or different before I'm willing to try them. That doesn't mean I won't, it just means I need time to get use to the idea.


Then I doubt you are a strong Se user. I would take ISFP and ISTP off of the list for you. 



> I am usually content to wait.


More evidence for no Se. 



> Do you like to just discover as you go without a plan?
> Yes, most of the time but it does depend upon the circumstances.


Why do you like to discover as you go though? 



> Are you good at improvising?
> It really depends upon the circumstances. When it comes to saving money I am. When it comes to interior decorating, social activities, etc. no.


Sounds like you are a practical person. Sounds like either inferior or no very little Se present. Again Se is not strong. 



> Do you seek adventures?
> Not really. I prefer to stick with the familar most of the time. I can be convinced to try new things, but it cannot be sprung on me unexpectedly.


Again, I do not see Se. I see Si. Se is all about the unexpected and adventures. Si is about familiarity. 



> Do you seek freedom and avoid commitments/routine?
> I definitely avoid commitments, and like the freedom to do what I want when I want. However, I do tend to have some basic routines that I follow every day.


Sounds like Si is present but not so much Te. Maybe ISFJ again. 



> I prefer proven methods and I do look for answers based upon what has happened in the past.


Si. 



> This is heavily dependent upon how important something is. For the most part I don't plan much in advance. I like the freedom to figure it out as I go along.


Could indicate Se, or Si who doesn't use a lot of Te. So again, maybe ISFJ. 



> Depends upon if there is danger involved. If it is dangerous, it's fine for TV but not for me.


I see Si over Se here. 



> Not at all sentimental. I don't care if everything is in its place. In fact I don't know what everything being in its place would even mean for me. As long as it has a semblance of order, is clean, and I can find what I need I don't mind.


Maybe ISFJ over ISTJ because it seems Te=external order is not something of massive importance to you. 



> Are you 1. or 2.? (from Robert2928's example)
> 
> I don't know what Robert2928 is? but I would say probably #2
> 
> 2. “Wow that girl hugged me so she must like me…then again (insert other girl name here) hugged me and she didn’t like me so maybe I’m wrong”


#1 was a Ni scenario- conceptual experience
#2 was Si- concrete experience

You chose #2 so I would say you are at least Si over Ni. 



> Examples


Again you chose the Si answer- concrete thinking/examples over the Ni answer- conceptual thinking/the general idea. So again you use Si over Ni. 



> I would probably give details that included information about size and colors.


If you were using Si I would expect you to say how the bird reminds you of some event that happened in your life, or own pet of yours.
But you would provide details which indicates Si. A Se user would say "I see a bird." They just see what's in front of them, nothing less, nothing more, no details. And I think maybe you use lower Ti because to me the size and color of the bird didn't matter, just that he reminded me of my own bird. "He has the same grumpy yet loving look on his face just like my own bird. Looking at the bird swells up my love for my own cockatiel."- me seeing a picture of a bird. 



> I still need to watch the videos, I got started on this a bit late.
> I hope my answers make sense and that I understood the questions correctly.
> 
> Thank you!


That's ok, great! So far I'm thinking ISFJ for you. You're welcome


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## jamaix (Sep 20, 2013)

Kitty23 said:


> I am sentimental and a bit nostalgic. I get attached to items, but not so much people. Yes, I like functional purpose too. Maybe since you get attached to people you are an ISFJ?


I just noticed that you were able to look at what I had so far. I did tweak one of my responses a bit because I think it gave the wrong impression. When I said I get attached to people, I am only talking about a very small select group. Mostly immediate family, I often shun social gatherings where there will be a lot of people. I prefer very small group settings occurring infrequently. 

I'm hoping to finish reading and watching the rest of the information you posted tomorrow evening. I just noticed that this forum keeps you quite busy. It is very kind of you to spend so much time helping complete strangers.

I appreciate all the time and effort you have put into helping me figure this out.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

> I just noticed that you were able to look at what I had so far. I did tweak one of my responses a bit because I think it gave the wrong impression. When I said I get attached to people, I am only talking about a very small select group. Mostly immediate family, I often shun social gatherings where there will be a lot of people. I prefer very small group settings occurring infrequently.
> 
> I'm hoping to finish reading and watching the rest of the information you posted tomorrow evening. I just noticed that this forum keeps you quite busy. It is very kind of you to spend so much time helping complete strangers.
> 
> I appreciate all the time and effort you have put into helping me figure this out.


Ahh ok, so if you do use Fe, then I would guess it's your second function not first. Haha, yes this forum does keep me quite busy. Aww, thank you, I think self- discovery is very important and if I can help even just a little then I do. So far I would cross off dominant Fe, Te, Se, Ni, and probably dominant Ne for you. That leaves dominant Si, Fi, and Ti. You're welcome  

*This site shows who you are at your worst:*

Accurate Typing: The Inferior Function - MBTI Notes

*Something each mbti type struggles with:*

Something That Each Myers-Briggs Type Struggles With

*What each dominant function looks like in children (we are often are most natural selves as children): *

https://www.kidzmet.com/blog/myers-briggs-personality-types-vs-childhood-personalities/

*The childhood struggles of each myers briggs type:*

The Childhood Struggles of Every Myers Briggs Type - Psychology Junkie

*How each functions manifests based on where it is in stack:*

How Each Cognitive Function Manifests Based On Its Position In Your Stacking | Thought Catalog

*Inferior Ne:*

The Plight of Inferior Ne - Funky MBTI in Fiction

*Inferior Fe:*

The Annoyance of Inferior Fe - Funky MBTI in Fiction

Inferior Fe (and What I Haven't Been Seeing... - Funky MBTI in Fiction

*Inferior Te:*

How Functions Work: Inferior Te (ISFP/INFP) - MBTI Notes

*Inferior Se:*

Inferior Se in an INFJ - Funky MBTI in Fiction

Inferior Se: the monk's inner libertine - Funky MBTI in Fiction

*Erasing ISTJ stereotypes:*

http://funkymbtifiction.tumblr.com/post/120520986310/erasing-istj-stereotypes


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## jamaix (Sep 20, 2013)

Kitty23 said:


> That's ok, great! So far I'm thinking ISFJ for you. You're welcome


I watched the first and 2nd fi vs fe videos, and I'm leaning towards believing I'm more fi than fe. The 2nd video really made it clear to me.

I remembered something that I had forgotten about. I know someone (early 20's) who is quite good at typing people, I don't see them often because they live some distance from me. They made the comment that those who are older and have matured, are hard to type. After thinking about it, I realized that makes a lot of sense. Those who are older have often learned how to compensate for areas they may have been lacking in. They understand how others will interpret things and often figure out how to adapt. @_AllyKat_ mentioned something along those lines as well.

The 2nd video made mention of the facial expression of fi users and how they typically had more forced smiles. I remember being told regularly when I was young to smile. I taught a childrens class when I was in my early 20's and I remember one student looking very seriously at me and saying, "you're pretty when you smile?" It made me feel bad, because I realized that I seldom if ever smiled when I was around the kids. I hadn't thought about them noticing it. I had to work at looking happy so that I wouldn't be told to smile. I wasn't unhappy, I just didn't go around smiling. I think because I'm older, I learned how people would interpret my facial expressions and adapted rather than hearing about it. I've done this for so long that it has become habit.

Also, when I mentioned that "things" weren't as important to me as people, I thought about this some more and remembered that it hasn't always been that way. When I was younger, I valued having a really nice home, nice furniture and furnishings. Now, I realize those things have very little bearing on whether I'm happy. I stopped valuing them as I no longer saw them as very important. 

Also, I should note that I'm married to an INFJ, I had to make a lot of adjustments due to that. My husband is a bit sensitive, and in our early years I often handled things in a manner that hurt him. I didn't mean to, I just didn't think about how he might take things. I read countless relationship books trying to figure out how to be more attune. I have no doubt this helped me understand how to relate to others better. 
@_Kitty23_ I decided to share all of this information with you because you work so hard to help so many figure out their type. I thought it might be beneficial for you to know how being older might throw things off. I hate to put my age on here, but I have children around the age of many on PerC (my youngest is 20 and my oldest is 23). I think age definitely makes typing a bit more difficult. I had to take a walk back through memory lane. 

I want to thank you for all the information you supplied. The video talking about facial expressions triggered me remembering the things that I mentioned.

You have been a great help! Thank you so much! :smile:



PS I had already typed this up and didn't realize that you had posted something new.


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## Kitty23 (Dec 27, 2015)

Yes, I usually recommend people think back to childhood, which is why I listed two links about mbti and childhood (but I know you'll read them soon). I think they'll come in handy for you  So you think Fi over Fe? Or maybe you use lower Fe? Oh good, I'm glad I could help!  And thank you for reminding me about how age affects mbti typing!


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