# What's with the generation bashing?



## Glenda Gnome Starr

So this forum is supposed to be a place where people of different generations can chat with their cohorts or get perspectives from people from other generations. Yet I see a lot of bashing of entire generations. Sometimes, people even bash their own generation. What is with that? How can everyone in a generation be so rotten, no good, low down, and bad and equally so. Oh, and identical. No individuality? What about personality types????
Please comment and explain.
Thank you.


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## Glenda Gnome Starr

So, I'd like to say one more thing... and I really am looking for other viewpoints besides my own.

We live in a sad and sorry world. We've got environmental degradation and pointless wars and nuclear weapons and terrorism and cancer and all sorts of problems. People have to struggle to maintain some sort of lifestyle that involves having enough to eat and shelter and all of the stuff that makes living somewhat comfortable, rather than a daily struggle with death.

Generational bashing really is a luxury of the developed part of the world. Where people are struggling with death on a daily basis, they aren't thinking of which generation made their daily pain possible. They are just thinking of making sure that they and their families have a next meal or that thugs don't kill them where they sleep at night.

So I consider myself fortunate to live in a house and to have regular meals and to have warm clothing and a healthy body. I don't have lots of extra stuff but I do have the necessities of life. Still, I see the world's problems and I wish that I were better equipped to solve them because I believe that I should leave the world a better place than it was when I entered it. I have done little things but nothing grand. I don't think that I have made a big difference. But it was not for lack of effort.

But I have done these little things to try to improve the world as an individual, not as an anonymous member of a generation. I can take responsibility only for what I have done as one person. I can't take responsibility for what my generation has or has not done. Why do I say this? I didn't choose the year of my birth. It was random. It just happened. 

I have never blamed any generation for ruining my world. The wrecking wasn't done by large numbers of people. It wasn't done by entire generations acting as a group (like the ants that are trying to eat my mom's house). It was done by policy makers making poor choices. It was done over the course of many years... one poor decision made after the next... one uninformed program after another. The results have been disastrous.

But still, I try to do what little I can to make changes in this sad and sorry world because I refuse to abdicate my small amount of power to foolish policy makers and governmental leaders. These powers that be prefer to see us battling one another because they like the divide and conquer theory.

If you believe that you and your generation have been given the short end of the stick, then do something about it. Don't give up your power. You may not make huge, dramatic change, but you have the power within you to try to effect change.

And, if we work together, instead of against one another, maybe we can make that big, dramatic change.

Have a great day!!!!


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## PowerShell

walking tourist said:


> Generational bashing really is a luxury of the developed part of the world.


Generational bashing has been going on since the beginning of time. It's not isolated to "first world problems."


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## Glenda Gnome Starr

You could be right about that. 



PowerShell said:


> Generational bashing has been going on since the beginning of time. It's not isolated to "first world problems."


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## Antipode

The answer is fairly simple, sadly: Once you become part of a group, every other group is "wrong." It comes with the feelings of insecurities in the human race. 

Three people are at a table--two skinny people and one fat person. Skinny A says to Skinny B, "Man, that person is fat." 

Many things just happened in that one expression. First, the negativity says to Skinny B, "That person is different from us. Us meaning me and Skinny A. I am now a part of 'Us.' That means I belong somewhere. In order to keep this belonging strong, I must also focus on what makes other people different from 'Us,' or, in short, 'me.'"

Humans have a tendency to classify and discriminate. At least, primitive humans do. Once "you" can learn to accept your insecurities and overcome them, you begin to stand up for those who don't match your own characteristics. Both types of people belong to each generation.


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## PowerShell

Crono91 said:


> Humans have a tendency to classify and discriminate. At least, primitive humans do. Once "you" can learn to accept your insecurities and overcome them, you begin to stand up for those who don't match your own characteristics. Both types of people belong to each generation.


It's a bit more primal than that and ingrained a lot further than most people think. When it was a hunter-gatherer tribal societies all over the place, different could mean danger. A lion looks different and that difference constitutes a threat. That person from that tribe looks different and is not familiar. The thing is the people who stayed close to the same groups, survived and these primal instincts were passed on. Just because we are "civilized" doesn't mean it's not there. Look up the Paleo diet for a diet example. Just because we *can* eat refined grains and feel full on them doesn't mean that's what our bodies are truly craving.


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## yet another intj

walking tourist said:


> How can everyone in a generation be so rotten, no good, low down, and bad and equally so. Oh, and identical. No individuality?


Welcome to the wonderful world of sociology.


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## yankeemofo

I think it's because kids these days just don't listen!

Kidding...I think it's been pretty well covered in the above posts.


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## GenXer

Get off my lawn!!!!


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## emerald sea

I sure hope no one is bashing you, @_walking tourist_! if they are, tell me who's bashing you and I will do whatever I can to make it stop! a generation itself is neutral since the people of that generation are individuals who vary so much from one another. while it may be accurate to say that there are a lot of people within a certain generation with a certain trait or approach to life, it will definitely never be true of _all _or even a majority of them, so it should not be ascribed to all of them as any sort of generalization.


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## Glenda Gnome Starr

The bashing is not personal, and I know that it is not aimed against me. @emerald sea, I so appreciate your kindness and your support. It means the world to me.
Your explanation helps me understand this much better. Thank you so much!!!




emerald sea said:


> I sure hope no one is bashing you, @_walking tourist_! if they are, tell me who's bashing you and I will do whatever I can to make it stop! a generation itself is neutral since the people of that generation are individuals who vary so much from one another. while it may be accurate to say that there are a lot of people within a certain generation with a certain trait or approach to life, it will definitely never be true of _all _or even a majority of them, so it should not be ascribed to all of them as any sort of generalization.


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## EternalNocturne

yankeemofo said:


> I think it's because kids these days just don't listen!
> 
> Kidding...I think it's been pretty well covered in the above posts.


I've heard that one, haha...
I think that a major issue that causes generational tension, is simply arrogance.
This goes both ways..
While it's true, there are many "young people" that want to make their own mistakes and disregard any sage council, there are just as many cynical older people who think that age means wisdom. Age means you are old, and potentially even that you have at least some views that are outdated. I'm not saying the wisdom is outdated, but rather, certain worldview aspects.
For example, I've been told how it is impossible for anyone to succeed in life without college, because "it was that way when I was younger!".. The person was a cynical 70+ year old woman, with 0 acceptance for views other than her own.
Furthering the unacceptable bias that is held toward "younger people", I was accused of being a "disrespectful know-it-all", because I simply said "No, there are ways to live without going to college. I'm a music producer who is about to release an album, and potentially have it advertised on a channel with more than 3 million subscribers."
Yes, I'm a disrespectful know-it-all, because I didn't suck up like the other young adults there.
Another recent case involved a different cynical hag of a woman.. I was searching for a job, and I applied to probably 15 places in the first week of jobhunting. By the end of the second week, the woman confronted me and told me that I'm a liar, because if I were REALLY looking for a job, I would have one, because "if you really want a job you just walk in there and tell them you need a job. Those places had help wanted signs! They would have given you a job if you tried!"
I explained that it's not so simple, but she just repeatedly told me that I"m lying, and respectfully, I walked away without another word.
This is what I mean by a dated worldview.. It's not the 1950s anymore, and the world operates in a highly different way than it used to.

Of course, on the brighter side.. I was in a youth group, and we had this one man of his late 80s, who would almost always attend.
He was funny, wise, and completely non-forceful. He would walk into the room, give someone a hug, tell them how nice they look, and maybe tell a story. He was basically the youth group grandfather, universally loved by all members, even to the day of his passing.
He would always tell people "I'm here to learn!", and he carried that to the end.
His apparent lack of arrogance and his willingness to accept everyone regardless of whether we were living according to his mold of what a good life is, that's what made him an amazing man.

I guess what I'm saying is regardless of age, if younger people would respect older people, and vice versa, without the arrogant belief that the respect should be uneven (I.E. Respect me and suck up to me because I'm your elder), the problem wouldn't exist.


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## Glenda Gnome Starr

I agree with everything that you've said.
Arrogance is a big problem. I have observed it, too.
One of the things that people (usually older ones) say that irritates the heck out me is, "Well, we've always done it this way..."
Sometimes, change is needed. 
If there were never any change, we'd still believe that the earth is flat and that we could fall of the edge of it if we're not careful. 
If there were never any change, we'd still be using outhouses, instead of flush toilets.
But change is a part of life, and it is good.
Age doesn't mean wisdom. People don't necessarily grow wiser as they grow older. Fortunately, we are able to learn at any age, and we can still grow and develop, even into old age. I'm glad that you met that elderly man with the delightful attitude.
I also agree that respect (or the lack thereof) is a big issue that contributes to generational conflict.
Personally, I think that people deserve respect merely because they exist. I don't think that people need to do anything to earn that respect, although I think that it is possible to lose respect by doing really bad stuff. 
As for that cynical hag of a woman, during your recent job hunting experience, her comments were way out of line. It is just not acceptable for her to call you a liar or any other name, for that matter. That is not helpful to you in any way. It also makes her look bad.
I have met people like that, and they have talked to me in exactly that way. It is very irritating. I used to blame myself for their response, feeling that I was a failure. Now I have learned that I am not responsible for other people's attitudes.
But I am responsible for my own and for the way that I approach other people. So I try to respect people because they exist. Their age is irrelevant. Whether they are little babies, children, young adults, middle aged people, or old people, they deserve respect. I hope that I am doing that.



Undoubtedly said:


> I've heard that one, haha...
> I think that a major issue that causes generational tension, is simply arrogance.
> This goes both ways..
> While it's true, there are many "young people" that want to make their own mistakes and disregard any sage council, there are just as many cynical older people who think that age means wisdom. Age means you are old, and potentially even that you have at least some views that are outdated. I'm not saying the wisdom is outdated, but rather, certain worldview aspects.
> For example, I've been told how it is impossible for anyone to succeed in life without college, because "it was that way when I was younger!".. The person was a cynical 70+ year old woman, with 0 acceptance for views other than her own.
> Furthering the unacceptable bias that is held toward "younger people", I was accused of being a "disrespectful know-it-all", because I simply said "No, there are ways to live without going to college. I'm a music producer who is about to release an album, and potentially have it advertised on a channel with more than 3 million subscribers."
> Yes, I'm a disrespectful know-it-all, because I didn't suck up like the other young adults there.
> Another recent case involved a different cynical hag of a woman.. I was searching for a job, and I applied to probably 15 places in the first week of jobhunting. By the end of the second week, the woman confronted me and told me that I'm a liar, because if I were REALLY looking for a job, I would have one, because "if you really want a job you just walk in there and tell them you need a job. Those places had help wanted signs! They would have given you a job if you tried!"
> I explained that it's not so simple, but she just repeatedly told me that I"m lying, and respectfully, I walked away without another word.
> This is what I mean by a dated worldview.. It's not the 1950s anymore, and the world operates in a highly different way than it used to.
> 
> Of course, on the brighter side.. I was in a youth group, and we had this one man of his late 80s, who would almost always attend.
> He was funny, wise, and completely non-forceful. He would walk into the room, give someone a hug, tell them how nice they look, and maybe tell a story. He was basically the youth group grandfather, universally loved by all members, even to the day of his passing.
> He would always tell people "I'm here to learn!", and he carried that to the end.
> His apparent lack of arrogance and his willingness to accept everyone regardless of whether we were living according to his mold of what a good life is, that's what made him an amazing man.
> 
> I guess what I'm saying is regardless of age, if younger people would respect older people, and vice versa, without the arrogant belief that the respect should be uneven (I.E. Respect me and suck up to me because I'm your elder), the problem wouldn't exist.


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## INFJAnimal

What...wait a sec? You mean the world ISN'T FLAT??? When the heck did this happen? :tongue: The teachers never told me this. I've always thought that ships fall off the end of the earth when they hit Vancouver Island. :wink:


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## Glenda Gnome Starr

Whoops. Now you've caught me. I lied.
The earth is flat. Watch out when you're in that ship!!!!!



INFJAnimal said:


> What...wait a sec? You mean the world ISN'T FLAT??? When the heck did this happen? :tongue: The teachers never told me this. I've always thought that ships fall off the end of the earth when they hit Vancouver Island. :wink:


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## Aquamarine

walking tourist said:


> So, I'd like to say one more thing... and I really am looking for other viewpoints besides my own.
> 
> We live in a sad and sorry world. We've got environmental degradation and pointless wars and nuclear weapons and terrorism and cancer and all sorts of problems. People have to struggle to maintain some sort of lifestyle that involves having enough to eat and shelter and all of the stuff that makes living somewhat comfortable, rather than a daily struggle with death.
> 
> Generational bashing really is a luxury of the developed part of the world. Where people are struggling with death on a daily basis, they aren't thinking of which generation made their daily pain possible. They are just thinking of making sure that they and their families have a next meal or that thugs don't kill them where they sleep at night.
> 
> So I consider myself fortunate to live in a house and to have regular meals and to have warm clothing and a healthy body. I don't have lots of extra stuff but I do have the necessities of life. Still, I see the world's problems and I wish that I were better equipped to solve them because I believe that I should leave the world a better place than it was when I entered it. I have done little things but nothing grand. I don't think that I have made a big difference. But it was not for lack of effort.
> 
> But I have done these little things to try to improve the world as an individual, not as an anonymous member of a generation. I can take responsibility only for what I have done as one person. I can't take responsibility for what my generation has or has not done. Why do I say this? I didn't choose the year of my birth. It was random. It just happened.
> 
> I have never blamed any generation for ruining my world. The wrecking wasn't done by large numbers of people. It wasn't done by entire generations acting as a group (like the ants that are trying to eat my mom's house). It was done by policy makers making poor choices. It was done over the course of many years... one poor decision made after the next... one uninformed program after another. The results have been disastrous.
> 
> But still, I try to do what little I can to make changes in this sad and sorry world because I refuse to abdicate my small amount of power to foolish policy makers and governmental leaders. These powers that be prefer to see us battling one another because they like the divide and conquer theory.
> 
> If you believe that you and your generation have been given the short end of the stick, then do something about it. Don't give up your power. You may not make huge, dramatic change, but you have the power within you to try to effect change.
> 
> And, if we work together, instead of against one another, maybe we can make that big, dramatic change.
> 
> Have a great day!!!!


Sometimes, if something goes wrong, it is the fault of a few individuals, not the entire generation.

We have a lot to learn from members of other generations, so generation-bashing is pointless.


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## Swede

Very interesting thread! 

I think that generation bashing is sometimes a sign of helplessness. I was part of the problem myself when I was younger and we learned that my parents generation didn't necessarily take the following generations into account when 'running the country'. However, as we say 'if you are not part of the solution, you're part of the problem'. It is easier to sit back and complain than to do something constructive. 
Likewise, I think that old people can sometimes be envious of some of the opportunities that younger people get nowadays that may not have been available to them back in the day.

I believe that as a young person, distancing yourself from the older generation is also a natural part of becoming your own person. We often have to rebel against our parents or perceived authority as a step in becoming adults and finding ourselves instead of being a person based on what the adults in our surrounding assume that we are.

I do also think that some older people lack in their belief (not sure this is the best word) in young people. I try not to be part of that group (or I wouldn't have signed up at PerC). When I started working as a B3 level engineer but looked about 10 years younger than my actual age, I was sometimes met with the 'that is so cute my little friend' attitude from colleagues (part of that is probably also the fact that I am a female and stirred up the 'protective' and 'fatherly' emotions among older males). When I noticed this, I usually let it slip how old I was and the attitude usually magically adjusted. LOL. I mean, I appreciate being mentored and that someone shows me the ropes, but condescending tones are not appreciated, no matter of age, gender, race, background etc.

Finally, I think that a big part of the problem might be that many cultures separate us based on age now. This was extra obvious when I moved away from my family in my mid-twenties. The only people that I interacted with for years were my peers in grad-school and most of them were my age. Chances to interact with the generations around mine did not naturally present themselves. Now I treasure hanging out with people from different age groups, because it is a treat for me and nothing that I can take for granted. My best friends at work are between late twenties to early sixties and I truly enjoy our discussions. Plus we laugh together a lot!


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## mushr00m

Generation bashing has existed for long time, id say in Britain, it was more prevalent. Saying's such as _respect your elders, don't talk back otherwise you'll get a clip round the ear, back in our day, when things were different, there's no hope for young kids these days_ etc etc. All those messages helped drill in our heads that the younger generation is inferior to the older generation and this was the norm until more or less today/recent years. So, if anything, generational hate is only really being questioned recently and as a result of the increasing appeal of equality and the OP is a perfect example of this. Actually, to tell a lie, it's been an ongoing battle since equality become more prevalent in modern society especially since the 60's. Some still believe life years adds to a person's worth or due respect.


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## Codera

People just tend to want to show superiority and entitlement over another group, just to make themselves feel better about their position, probably as a means of venting out jealousy for not being like the group that they aspire to be (Gen Y wishing to be like Gen X and then bashing Gen Z afterwards).


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## Janneson

I wish I knew I'm always pointing out that the older generations aren't as perfect as they make themselves out to be. We're their children we weren't there when they were growing up so we hear the "filtered" version of their childhoods. All the gritty messed up stuff is nicely plucked away so they sound so great but really they were making just as many mistakes as we are today. But I guess that's just life.


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