# I just learned a good friend of mine is doing heroin.



## Kevinaswell (May 6, 2009)

Suggestions?

Her mother is about to die from cancer and has like no organs or something.

....


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## Slider (Nov 17, 2009)

How about: "Stop doing heroin...or else!"


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## Mind Marauder (Nov 12, 2009)

Talk to her about it but don't be confrontational about it (at least not at first). Do you all have any mutual friends?


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## Tommy (Nov 25, 2009)

If she's a really good friend, I would drag her out! Never let a person you care about walk down that road.


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## Rourk (Feb 17, 2009)

Be sure to smoke tons of weed and drink a bunch before the intervention. That way you can get her the proper help she needs whilst enjoying your own personal addictions. It's ironic to me that heroin gets such a bad rep, meanwhile people go through their dime bags once day and never consider it a habit at all. If you don't smoke tons of weed or drink a bunch, then never mind. I just think that the large majority of people out there who do are full of nonsense when they confront others about a drug problem.


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## Mind Marauder (Nov 12, 2009)

Rourk said:


> Be sure to smoke tons of weed and drink a bunch before the intervention. That way you can get her the proper help she needs whilst enjoying your own personal addictions. It's ironic to me that heroin gets such a bad rep, meanwhile people go through their dime bags once day and never consider it a habit at all. If you don't smoke tons of weed or drink a bunch, then never mind. I just think that the large majority of people out there who do are full of nonsense when they confront others about a drug problem.


Never was much of a fan of hypocrisy myself.


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## Rourk (Feb 17, 2009)

Kevin, look into methadone clinics. They may be able to give you some free methadone or you may be able to direct her to one. The government will provide methadone free of charge, I believe. Had a friend who did something along these lines.


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## susurration (Oct 22, 2009)

Sure, hypocritical but..


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## Perseus (Mar 7, 2009)

ESFJs like Heroin. It cuases less problems for everybody else compared to when they get drunk. Their driving is better as well.


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## Perseus (Mar 7, 2009)

NatalieAnne said:


> Sure, hypocritical but..





Can you enlighten us a bit more on the source? Where is LSD on the map? Also Alcohol, Pemoline Ephedrine?


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## 480 (Jan 22, 2009)

My suggestion would be to not think you can help her. Beyond putting people who can help her in touch with her. Note the directionality of that.

Once that is done, move out of the way and be there for her in a supporting fashion. Or... wait for her to stop hating you.


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## 480 (Jan 22, 2009)

Rourk said:


> Be sure to smoke tons of weed and drink a bunch before the intervention. That way you can get her the proper help she needs whilst enjoying your own personal addictions. It's ironic to me that heroin gets such a bad rep, meanwhile people go through their dime bags once day and never consider it a habit at all. If you don't smoke tons of weed or drink a bunch, then never mind. I just think that the large majority of people out there who do are full of nonsense when they confront others about a drug problem.


Everyone has vices. Casting judgment on who's is "better", is nothing more than a self-righteous search for absolution.


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## Rourk (Feb 17, 2009)

Grim said:


> Everyone has vices. Casting judgment on who's is "better", is nothing more than a self-righteous search for absolution.


I agree this wholeheartedly. Did you think I didn't? It was the whole point.


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## Blackstone (Dec 7, 2009)

The only person that can help her is herself. She will first have to come to the realization that she needs help before she can start receiving it.


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## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

Your friend is hellbent on destroying herself. It's heartbreaking, but she can't be stopped. Rehabilitation doesn't work unless the user wants it and *knows* they want it.

The best thing you can do for her is to tell her how she is destroying her life. Give her examples specific to her. Point out how she can get help. She will probably hate you for it and walk away. Let her. Sooner or later she will come to her personal rock bottom. One of two things will happen. She'll die or she will stop. Only when she stops will she know that you were one of the few who loved her enough to *not* support her self-destruction.

Do not let yourself feel too sorry for her. No matter how bad the circumstances of her life, she is doing this to herself. Do not let her drag you down too.


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## Sunless (Jul 30, 2009)

i had a boyfriend who was a junkie. *trust me*: nothing you can do will change anything. There is nothing you can do.


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## SeekJess (Nov 1, 2009)

my only advice to you is, understand that this is the addicts choice to use, and choice to quit. Do not make ultimatums. I repeat DO NOT. Do not guilt trip her, saying "if you really loved ___ or your life, you wouldn't be doing this". When you are a drug user, you have to see the light yourself, no one else can help you but you. And you have to want to help yourself. My only advice other than that is, gently try to help her realize she has a problem, but before you do that. Make sure you have resources readily available to help her. Like NA, AA, or some rehab facility. 

I am a recovering drug addict myself, I have been sober for two years in April of 2010. SO I am speaking from my own experience.


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## Tommy (Nov 25, 2009)

What is up with you! What if the person dies from overdose? Would you feel no guilt? Do you love(friend way) her if you are not there for her? 

My culture is probably much tighter than the others posting above, and I respect those with experience.

Just be there for her, be someone who care. There is always something you can do.


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## Alchemical Romance (Nov 26, 2009)

I have the same problem with my cousin hopefully she's doing only pot from what i hear....but she's 14, and she came for
me to advice her on making a joint...here's what i did

Step 1. On pretext of watching a movie i showed her "Requiem for a Dream" , it's the kind of junkie movie where every junkie dies or wish they did....that may have a psychological effect...hell it did on me a few years ago so i kinda speak from experiance :mellow:

Step 2. Psychologically type him/her...may come in handy with...
Step 3. Talk to him/her in accordance to type. If NT give reasons if NF talk about doing that hurts the ideal and so on (When a friend showed Requiem For a Dream to me i saw...me in a few years...i dropped LSD and Coke like a hot potato...never taken heroin though
Step 4.If everything fails...this is going to sound harsh and backstabbing but that's the most rational thing you can do...gather evidence of behaviour...and go to a detox clinic. You will be forgiven someday.


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## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

Tommy said:


> What is up with you! What if the person dies from overdose? Would you feel no guilt? Do you love(friend way) her if you are not there for her?
> 
> My culture is probably much tighter than the others posting above, and I respect those with experience.
> 
> Just be there for her, be someone who care. There is always something you can do.


I must respectfully but wholeheartedly disagree with you. Kevinaswell should not be made to feel guilty here. There is no good reason to feel guilt over somebody elses actions. Sadness, yes. Guilt would imply that he has some control over this girls actions. Sure, he could drag her ass to a detox center but if she didn't want to quit, what do you think happens the moment she gets out? She sure as hell isn't rehabilitated. Just sober and jonesing. It's like yelling at a brick wall. She has to want to quit. It has to come of her own accord.

Being there, supporting a drug user while they are destroying themself does not help. It validates their drug use and does not show them that they are hurting themself. Being there to tell the user that they are destroying themself does help. Walking away and waiting until they ask for help quitting is also helpful. This may make them angry at the time, but if they ever find their way out, the real friends will be remembered. Trying to force a druggie to quit using does not work, no matter how good your intentions are.

EDIT: Sticking around watching her get hurt, listening to her problems will only hurt Kevin to no good end.


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## Tommy (Nov 25, 2009)

Aubrey, I respect your opinion! I don't even disagree. 

I'm sorry if I came out a bit judgemental. I'm just saying, that if I was in that situation, I'd try to get both of us out alive. If I did drugs because of depression, then I would've wanted someone to drag me out of it. It's probably my addiction to life. It's just that I would've wanted someone to encourage me, to be a rope that could pull me up, a beacon of love and hope! And in the other situation, as the perfect me, I would've easily sacrificed a part of me to save a person I loved. I just value life that much.

But Aubrey's experienced viewpoints are probably better, and more appropiate. But I'm not in support of it.


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## screamofconscious (Oct 15, 2009)

Tommy said:


> Aubrey, I respect your opinion! I don't even disagree.
> 
> I'm sorry if I came out a bit judgemental. I'm just saying, that if I was in that situation, I'd try to get both of us out alive. If I did drugs because of depression, then I would've wanted someone to drag me out of it. It's probably my addiction to life. It's just that I would've wanted someone to encourage me, to be a rope that could pull me up, a beacon of love and hope! And in the other situation, as the perfect me, I would've easily sacrificed a part of me to save a person I loved. I just value life that much.
> 
> But Aubrey's experienced viewpoints are probably better, and more appropiate. But I'm not in support of it.


I understand. Your view sounds very idealistic and in a perfect world, that's just how it should happen. Unfortunately, I've never seen it work this way. I'm not saying that Kevin should just abandon his friend. He should be there for her if she really wants to quit and he should let it be known that he's willing to help (I'm assuming he is)...it's just that help that comes in a lasting form is often the most difficult option.


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## NotSoRighteousRob (Jan 1, 2010)

I know it's a bit late to reply to this topic, but if her addiction is true it is likely it hasn't changed. The best thing you can do in my experience is just to spend time with them, to try to find activities that will keep them occupied for long periods of time, at first something like methadone or subutex/suboxone will be very beneficial. You have to show this person that they can enjoy themselves without the use of a drug. This process will take months, maybe even longer, and you will need to keep her surrounded by sober friends as much as possible. From what I've seen, no heroin addict wants to remain addicted, they just feel powerless and believe they do not have enough control to beat their addiction. It is very likely that regardless of what you do you will not be able to help, but telling others about their problem will make them lose their trust in you, and abandoning them will make them feel more hopeless. It is a very delicate situation, and even by making every right decision you can could still end in failure.


All I can say is never preach to them, just show them that you care and do what you can to show them there is still life beyond the drug, with people who will do what it takes to help.


(I stumbled upon this thread trying to get a better sense to judge you from, sorry if this is a belated response.)


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## Nearsification (Jan 3, 2010)

If your friend becomes that desperate. Call the cops.rehab is better then dieing. I remember when my friend was on drugs and we were like 12. I actually stole the drugs and burned them.


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## Misanthropy (Jan 25, 2010)

Perseus said:


> Can you enlighten us a bit more on the source?


ScienceDirect Login

There you go.


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## NotSoRighteousRob (Jan 1, 2010)

Misanthropy said:


> ScienceDirect Login
> 
> There you go.


just so you know, your asking people to spend 32 dollars to read an article.

here is a page where you can look at previews to the articles for free, but I can vouch for the accuracy of the original posted picture representing the use and harmfulness of different drugs


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## Misanthropy (Jan 25, 2010)

RighteousRob said:


> just so you know, your asking people to spend 32 dollars to read an article.
> 
> here is a page where you can look at previews to the articles for free, but I can vouch for the accuracy of the original posted picture representing the use and harmfulness of different drugs


Really? Shit.


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