# Anybody else feel like being Sx isn't really a personality trait, it's a disorder?



## perpetuallyreticent (Sep 24, 2014)

10050101 said:


> When we fall in love we want to consume and be consumed to the point where saner more down to earth people run in fear.


come on, you and I.. let's just, idk, get together. 

but really, this is exactly how I am with relationships. And I guess from someone else's point of view it can be seen as obsessive, and look like I just want this weird, idealized version of the person I've created, but no. I seriously like this person, want them for who they are and want to shower them with my own, weird kind of love. All of the time. 

The need for such intense intimacy in a relationship is really hard to deal with. I'm not usually concerned about romance until I find someone that sparks my interest, and then I'm just... doomed. It doesn't help that the guy I like is an INTP. ah.. why, sx, why?


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## fasc (Jun 23, 2014)

Quang said:


> Pff without SX everyone will be sad sheeps roaming around in this meaningless world. SX is what makes life worth living!
> 
> SHEEPS I TELL YOU!! SHEEEEEEEPS!! SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPS *SX rage*


.


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## Dalton (Jun 10, 2013)

If you call Sx a disorder, you ought to call Soc & Sp the same. I understand why Sx would singled out, because it seems much rarer, but all three Instincts are obsessions.



Hotes McGoats said:


> 7 and sx go together well imho, I love being on a constant escapist acid trip.


How is it similar to an acid trip?


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## nichya (Jul 12, 2014)

10050101 said:


> I mean seriously guys, it's like we burn with a brighter light than everyone else. People around us can't help but be affected by our moods... and by god do we have moods! When we fall in love we want to consume and be consumed to the point where saner more down to earth people run in fear.
> 
> Really, don't you guys just feel sometimes that it would be very fucking nice to just be... normal? A nice mellow So/Sx or even Sp. Wouldn't it be nice to... fit in??


I hear you, also imagine the odds of being sx/sp soo much conflict.


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## kaylamint (Sep 18, 2014)

I'm a so/sx, and my sx used to drive me insane. Now I just channel it into my cats and its made me a lot chiller with relationships.
I still don't see it as a disease though, I love my desire to know the inner workings and mechanics of a person. It compliments my so very nicely.


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## petite libellule (Jul 4, 2012)

Naw. I think each instincts probably have similar attachment styles. (Drawing upon bowmans work and attachment theory) so it would make sense, we look to the other instincts like they're mental.


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## cannamella (Mar 25, 2014)

Is there a possibility that each variant has their own kind of disorder?


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## atenea (Sep 14, 2014)

I guess it's possible to be an unhealthy version of sx, but not that all (or even most) sx's are unhealthy.

I think I'm sx and for me it has a good and a bad side, like everything else in life.


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## Alomoes (Oct 5, 2014)

I don't know, but how do you know you aren't so or sp? I don't know what I am, other than a very socially minded reformer that wishes to do good through learning. Probably won't, but still. Have some faith in yourself. Well, I can't say that. To seek validation for yourself could be you way of thinking. You might enjoy being confused. :S


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## nichya (Jul 12, 2014)

It is all about society. If an sx nature is seen unhealthy when not being driven with passion and keeping your relationships mediocre and practical is healthy, if downplaying or ignoring your cravings, desires, personality and feelings is a virtue and if thinking your ideals and morals are occasion specific and could easily be customized to fit your benefits or to fit in is healthy ...yea I rather be unhealthy


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## Yikes (Dec 30, 2012)

7w8 sx/sp here. Sx-dom works for me until I enter a relationship. Once the first weeks of finding out how "we" works pass, I start feeling dissatisfied. I'm so greedy of intense experiences that if the relationship doesn't provide me with them all the time, I feel discontent. And that's bad. I've dated somebody (7w8 so/sx) for two months, and now as things start to settle a bit, I find myself disappointed if we don't have meaningful experiences every time we meet. I know it's not realistic to have everything you want all the time, and it shouldn't be. I'm just having difficulties to settle. I used to date an sx/so and the same problem occurred, so I don't think this is a matter of dating the wrong instinctual variant. And of course there are so many other factors that influence the relationship dynamics. 

So yeah. I'm an sx-dom and I have a problem. If other sx-doms have suggestions how to deal with this, I'd be more than happy to learn about them!


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## Sixty Nein (Feb 13, 2011)

All of the instincts are pretty useful, and are pragmatic in one way or another. It's just that the term _self preservation_ causes people to think that IT is the most useful instinct out there whenever what it represents can have it's downfalls pragmatically too. Maybe "Self Containment" or something like that would actually accurately capture what the instinct is about.

I think one example of the instinct backfiring would be a hyper capitalist mentality, where everything that isn't about gathering as much money as possible, is virtually worthless. Or in the mundane way, you are just someone who uses people for your own gain, in a way that is harmful to others.


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## truth number 2 (Jan 3, 2015)

Married sx here. Just do yourselves a favor in life and choose a partner with sx as there primary as well. It makes things much easier. We are so obsessed in a relationship that we are really hard to understand and my experience is that only another sx dom gets that. 
The obsession you have for each other will always be there but it will relax and become more balanced as you all fulfill all of the need to be the center of another persons life. At ;east that is my experience. Once that happened for me and I got used to having what I needed from my relationship and the ups and downs began to roll and level making my own life path easier and more clear. I can sit back and see the same for my husband. It is really a great thing to build life when you are fulfilled. Life is hard enough as it is...if you have the info to make it easier...do so.


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## Deus Absconditus (Feb 27, 2011)

Hmmmm, do I see some inherent aspect of myself as defective? Nope. Does it make it harder to build or maintain relationships with some other types of people? Yes, but thats a given with any aspect inherent with individuals. For every inherent aspect of an individuals psyche, there exists also its opposition which is an aspect inherent within an opposing individuals psyche. So some may see the inherent aspect as defective, just like there are those who will see that persons inherent aspects as defective.


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## DomNapoleon (Jan 21, 2012)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> I don't think I could date most Sp/Sx's unless they were 6s (*Sp 6 is sooo lovable* :blushed: ), as they tend to be a bit too icy and coquettish for my tastes. I need someone who is as obsessed with me as I am with them


calls @_chips_ :th_wink::crazy:


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## Vermillion (Jan 22, 2012)

No. I think people play up sx way more than necessary. And I say this as an sx dom.


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## Inveniet (Aug 21, 2009)

Well it can feel like it at times.
I've seen som really depressing takes on the Sx/Sp.
The Sx/So is supposed to be rather healthy according to certain takes on it, so there is that.
Personally I think that yes, my life has felt like shit, but no it was worth it in the end.
I can't imagine not having experienced the things I have.
Drawn towards the light until it burns you and the pain mixed with pure bliss.


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## 0+n*1 (Sep 20, 2013)

This was the perfect response to the threads about wishing to be sx. Both are in the same battleground.


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## Splash Shin (Apr 7, 2011)

I dont find to be that much of a barrier... I realise icant have intensity with people all of the time. it's jsut not reality. I'm perfectly content with that. I can do activities/interests to get that intensity if i want too.

in typicall type 7 sx fashion i do a lot of imagining for my sx needs. I imagine scenarios and situations and surprisingly enough, i feel satisfied from it.


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## CrudeAsAButton (Feb 18, 2015)

My SX boyfriend. The day after he told me he liked me, and told him I liked him too, he said, "I love you." I said, "You can't possibly know that." He cried.


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