# Lack of ambition regarding career



## UnicornRainbowLove (May 8, 2014)

From reading your post I'd say your problem is two-fold: 
1. You don't know what you want to do with life.
2. and not knowing makes you feel inferior and shy away from a problem that you know you'll someday have to face. 

Of course you'd probably solve both if you solve 1), but perhaps it's easier to start out with 2). Look at what beliefs you have about yourself and others. Do you somehow feel wrong about not having an ambition? Are you prone to envy? Do you even want to be ambitious? Do you have to right now? What do you feel like doing or exploring now or in the future? Is it really so bad to not know what to do at your age, and do you think things will be okay still?

Actually having too many choices can be blinding, not to mention depressing as there is so much to eliminate. This video talks about something along the same lines:


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## anarchitektur (Feb 11, 2011)

I'm not sure where this myth came from that achieving satisfaction in life is a matter of finding the right career. Most people don't like their jobs. They do them because it beats starving to death. If you want excitement and a life free of regrets, live fast and die young.


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## Tangled Kite (Apr 16, 2014)

I've been there and am still there. :frustrating:

What I suggest you do is surround yourself with people who do have that drive to actually set their goals into motion and even ask if you can get involved in one of their projects. That way you obligate yourself to get something accomplished and hopefully their ambition will rub off on you. Sure maybe it's not exactly what you had in mind and you want to do your own thing. But in my experience with this problem some kind of structure is needed otherwise you'll just think about doing things but never actually doing them. You need some kind of support system. If you still want to do your own thing, tell people what it is you want to do. That way you will feel more pressure and people will ask you how your project/career is going and cheer you on. Sometimes you can't wait for ambition and you have to move along without it. You might find that if you just try something it comes later. 

The bottom line is at some point you will just have to bite the bullet and get yourself involved in something. That initial step is sometimes the hardest but after that you build momentum because you are locked onto one thing instead of looking out onto a scape of endless possibilities and being stuck with indecision. If the first thing doesn't work then try another but you have to keep doing and trying things or you will be that old person with regrets. You are no longer a child with adults telling you what you should do every step of the way and sometimes doing your homework for you. You are in charge now and it's up to you to figure it out. 

On a side note, if you have no energy and are bored all the time it could be a medical issue, so you might want to get that checked out too.


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## theBoredOne (Sep 28, 2015)

starscream430 said:


> Question: What is your major and why did you graduate with such a major? :happy:
> 
> Using your major as a stepping stone could be a good way of finding a potential interest, which could lead into a profession.


I majored in design,I like to draw ever since I was a kid and I thought becoming a designer was fun. But now I realise that I don’t really like design jobs, designing packaging, brochure and stuffs….I find them boring


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## theBoredOne (Sep 28, 2015)

@Figure I majored in design, but I hate design jobs. I guess I want to be a writer(at least for now), or anything that involves story-making. However due to some complicated reason I can’t be a fulltime writer now and may have to work as a designer. I think that might be the reason why I lack ambition in doing it.

I have applied to several agencies but so far no result. It’s not that I don’t actually do anything. I do make effort (in the end) , but I find it highly unenjoyable to the point it makes me really stressed out or even angry. I just wish I could be more excited about life in general, even when doing stuffs that are not really my thing.



Figure said:


> I'd keep in mind that your first job is NOT likely to be your ideal - but you have to get started doing something. You don't have to, and probably aren't expected to stay long in your first job. It's much better to experience it and decide that it doesn't excite you, then use your experience to do something else than not have experience, and reject the first job because it doesn't LOOK like it will satisfy you.


This is exactly what my mother said to me hahaha. But I think you're right. I think too much about it and am pretty idealistic and perfectionist sometimes. I guess I just need to just 'jump in' more often.


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## elight (Nov 11, 2014)

I did feel a bit burned out after I got my master's degree, so I understand you feeling tired and not all that energetic to jump straight into new career. My situation is a bit different, though, I've started running my own small business during my studies. Maybe your problem might be the direction of your ambition. Perhaps it's more important to focus on doing whatever makes you happy, or find things that make you happy if you don't know what that exactly is. I think I'm ambitious enough but some people would disagree because I don't make big bucks right now. However, my ambition is not to be super rich super fast. I just want to do things I enjoy. So maybe you could focus on that, instead of building some abstract career that you don't really find all that satisfying.


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## theBoredOne (Sep 28, 2015)

centralman said:


> I don't know if you're an INTJ so I don't know what I say you can relate to.
> 
> INTJs are very methodical. In my experience, I didn't mind starting small at all. I gain confidence, knowledge and energy by starting small in any given point, then work my way up step by step.
> 
> ...


 I’m not an INTJ hahaha, don’t know what I am. I just thought you guys can help. :laughing:


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## Morn (Apr 13, 2010)

This can happen to an INTJ, but only if they don't feel their skills are quite up to what they are passionate about.



theBoredOne said:


> @_Figure_ I majored in design, but I hate design jobs. I guess I want to be a writer(at least for now), or anything that involves story-making. However due to some complicated reason I can’t be a fulltime writer now and may have to work as a designer. I think that might be the reason why I lack ambition in doing it.
> 
> I have applied to several agencies but so far no result. It’s not that I don’t actually do anything. I do make effort (in the end) , but I find it highly unenjoyable to the point it makes me really stressed out or even angry. I just wish I could be more excited about life in general, even when doing stuffs that are not really my thing.



Exactly, you don't feel you are up to what you want to do. Perfectionism has defeated ambition.
I would advise you need to find a line of work you find interesting to earn a living while you work on your writing skills.


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## FreeKekistan (Mar 4, 2015)

You'll figure it out later on.


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## centralman (Oct 5, 2015)

theBoredOne said:


> I’m not an INTJ hahaha, don’t know what I am. I just thought you guys can help. :laughing:


It would be tremendously helpful if you know your type and understand yourself, then pick the best way for your future.

We INTJs tend to see life or many other things for that matter is like a chessboard and we deal with it with a strategic emphasis.

There's no single or sure way of success. Even with our approach we may lose sight on the tree when we have our eyes on the whole forest.

There are plenty of free MBTI tests online, you may want to do a few of them to figure out what personality type you are.

Best of luck!


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## theBoredOne (Sep 28, 2015)

Starless Ubiquity said:


> I've been there.
> It is not ambition you lack, but meaning. There is no way you feel excited about something you see no meaning in.
> 
> Try a structured approach to this. Imagine you wouldn't have to work a single day in your life. How would you use your time? Write a list of activities you find stimulating and pleasant, then connect as many of these activities as possible to existing job profiles. How easily could you get such jobs? Is there a way you create this job and still make a living? Any gaps in your skill set you could already address? Whom would you involve, who could help you?
> ...



I’ve thought about that as well. I majored in design, but I just realise I actually hate design jobs. Working long hours doing boring design stuffs that requires lots of energy does seem kinda pointless for me. Sadly due to some complicated practical reason I might have to work a design job at least for now. Besides, that’s the only thing I can do now. But I guess you’re right about lacking a meaning. Maybe I need to assign a new meaning to it


Hahahaha, I mean “suppose to” as in like, I don’t have any reason not to be excited.


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## theBoredOne (Sep 28, 2015)

zosio913 said:


> Te-dominants are definitely good to be around when you want someone to kick your butt out the door (in the best sort of way) so you can get out there and do something.


Damn where can I find them. I think I need at least 10 of them hahahaah


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## StElmosDream (May 26, 2012)

Fear of failure or fear of not comparing well to others 'progress' can be quite debilitating, recalling my first degree that felt very much like collecting paper 'credibility', as if my goals were somehow too big for the expected level of competency and commitment a 4.0 GPA degree was supposed to represent.
Adjusting to uncertainty and questioning ideals (numbness even) is perfectly normal for the first few days-months after finishing studies that have represented an integral part of one's sense of self/group identity.

The important point to remember is that no one really expects recent graduates to know everything or be 100% sure of their own career path until at least 3-6 months into a first or second job.


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## umop 3pisdn (Apr 4, 2014)

What's ambition, is it a food, can I eat it?

But yeah, I have the same problem. Every career I can think of has some minor flaw that I can't get over. It's like all Jerry's girlfriends on Seinfeld (only with careers instead), they're all probably perfectly fine, but I can't get into it because I'm probably a crazy person or something.


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## Pete The Lich (May 16, 2011)

It would seem this person is posting this in several different type threads.

http://personalitycafe.com/search.php?searchid=29770066

I count at least 7 of the same post.

Just literally copy pasted


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## theBoredOne (Sep 28, 2015)

Pete The Lich said:


> It would seem this person is posting this in several different type threads.
> 
> http://personalitycafe.com/search.php?searchid=29770066
> 
> ...


hahahaahahaha . Yes I did. Just want different perpectives....:tongue:


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## Stavrogin (May 20, 2014)

For me it's not so much a lack of ambition as it is the fact that I'm a jack of all trades. There has as of yet been nothing that I felt that I couldn't do, but nothing that interested me enough to dedicate myself to. The exception being computer programming, the hate I feel towards coding burns with the fire of a thousand suns!

Ultimately the attitude I've taken is pick something you wouldn't mind doing but keep your options open, no matter what you pick there will be unexpected opportunities coming from the experience. So tough it through and keep your eyes open. And don't be afraid to take a risk.


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## Serak (Jul 26, 2012)

Perhaps you should look at it from a perspective of not the work you do but what you're doing the work for.

Doing IT like I do isn't super exciting in and of itself. I wouldn't even say I "enjoy" it. I enjoy problem solving, something that can sometimes overlap with my duties.

What I do like is using what I do to improve the lives of others, both through my full-time job and my business. That's what makes me love my work and every day I get to do it.

But if you truly can't stand the action of doing the work itself, then your problem runs deeper than that, @theBoredOne.

That said, I'm in need of some design services.

Any good with doing basic Themeing work with the ProBoards v5 software?


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## Razare (Apr 21, 2009)

theBoredOne said:


> ...


1) Why don't you have energy? Is it an energy problem or an ambition problem, there's a difference.

If you lack energy, but are ambitious, that could perhaps be addressed medically. There are things that zap our energy in life. For me, I had to start walking regularly.

2) Why *must* you be ambitious, if you have energy? I can be ambitious but it can get me into something deep that I later regret. Sometimes cautious is better. I've learned to be less ambitious and more level-headed and this is a good thing.

And don't worry about friends starting businesses. Most businesses fail. Their advantage in starting businesses is they'll learn what not to do from their failures. Keeping your head down and just working a consistent job has advantages.

Only way doing your own business makes sense, is if you got a competitive advantage... like a reason you can charge 20% above your competition and get rich. If you have to charge less to perform the same services, don't even bother, go work for someone... like one of those people you're charging less than, you'll make more money working for them and probably have more consistent scheduling.

What I learned from operating my own business is that a 9 to 5 is awesome. I can leave at 5 and a customer can't call me.


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## Fleetfoot (May 9, 2011)

StElmosDream said:


> Fear of failure or fear of not comparing well to others 'progress' can be quite debilitating, recalling my first degree that felt very much like collecting paper 'credibility', as if my goals were somehow too big for the expected level of competency and commitment a 4.0 GPA degree was supposed to represent.
> Adjusting to uncertainty and questioning ideals (numbness even) is perfectly normal for the first few days-months after finishing studies that have represented an integral part of one's sense of self/group identity.
> 
> The important point to remember is that no one really expects recent graduates to know everything or be 100% sure of their own career path until at least 3-6 months into a first or second job.


I know there's a thank button, but it wasn't enough. This post made me hate myself less, so thanks. 

I never really got a chance to get a second job after graduating, and I hated my first one. I've just been so insanely hard on myself because of it and it's destroying me. 

My advice is don't let this happen to you, don't force yourself to do a job you loathe, never fear failure or humility, because you never know when those turn into persistence and open-mindedness.


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## StElmosDream (May 26, 2012)

Fleetfoot said:


> I know there's a thank button, but it wasn't enough. This post made me hate myself less, so thanks.
> 
> I never really got a chance to get a second job after graduating, and I hated my first one. I've just been so insanely hard on myself because of it and it's destroying me.
> 
> My advice is don't let this happen to you, don't force yourself to do a job you loathe, never fear failure or humility, because you never know when those turn into persistence and open-mindedness.


To be perfectly honest I have never actually used my first degree (well maybe 10% of it and how to write reports or critically research), mostly using it as a springboard to get the actual experiences I sought (well internships, still waiting for full time jobs based upon my second degree).


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## Fleetfoot (May 9, 2011)

StElmosDream said:


> To be perfectly honest I have never actually used my first degree (well maybe 10% of it and how to write reports or critically research), mostly using it as a springboard to get the actual experiences I sought (well internships, still waiting for full time jobs based upon my second degree).


At this point I'm not too worried about utilizing it. It just makes me upset thinking I don't have any skill sets and threw tens of thousands of dollars down the drain to make me think I do and have a piece of paper to prove it. 

I just want a job that isn't fast food, repetitive or too morally questionable.


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## StElmosDream (May 26, 2012)

Fleetfoot said:


> At this point I'm not too worried about utilizing it. It just makes me upset thinking I don't have any skill sets and threw tens of thousands of dollars down the drain to make me think I do and have a piece of paper to prove it.
> 
> I just want a job that isn't fast food, repetitive or too morally questionable.


This bothered me also, realising that I had inadvertently made my degree too generalised choosing a course that taught many things but 'not to a high level of experience', realising too late that I disliked the subject anyway but needed something to show for my time to demonstrate capability to study a seemingly unrelated new subject.
Back on the conveyer belt of earning more industry specific experience but actually focusing on things I care about.


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