# Type Compatibility- Which type would you choose?



## ponyjoyride (May 7, 2010)

16. INFP-

a. ESFJ
b. ENFJ
c. ISTJ 


If these are the options, could I just stay single for the rest of my life?


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## Lullaby (Jul 21, 2010)

2. ENFP:
a. INTJ
b. INFJ

I would love both, but the INTJ sounds more appealing. INTPs are something else I always look for (their Ne is pure bliss), but I do think INTJs are better romantically.  I'm with an ISTP (?) right now and I'm enjoying it quite a bit, he's very refreshing. But then again, he has excellent Ni. I don't know if I'd be able to handle a strong S.

And no one with Fe dominant or auxiliary, kthxbai.


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## punky16 (Nov 9, 2010)

*Example of A, B, & C Relationships*

I thought it might put things into perspective better if I gave examples of each one that most people would know of...so here goes...




*"A" Relationship Examples:*

1. Ross (ENTP) and Rachel (INFJ) on "Friends"








2. Iris (ENTP) and John (INFJ) in the movie Iris








3. Landon (ESFJ) and Jamie (INFP) in A Walk to Remember








Songs:

Weathered love by Toix











*"B" Relationship Examples:*

1. Jamie Lee Curtis (ENTP) and Dan Aykroyd (INTJ)

My Girl 1 & 2

Trading Places

Christmas with the Kranks



(skip to about 5 minutes into it)








2. Judi Drench (ENTP) and her TV husband (INTJ) on this link:

YouTube - As Time Goes By The New Neighbours S7 Ep3 Part1!



3. Mulder (INTP) and Scully (ENTJ) from XFiles:








4. Tom Cruise (plays an ESFP) and Renee Zellweger (ISFJ) in Jerry Maguire








Songs:

John Mayer - Comfortable









*
"C" Relationship Examples:*

1. Rachel McAdams (INFP) and Ryan Gosling (ISTJ) in the Notebook








2. Johnny Cash (ISTP) and June Carter (INFJ) in Walk the Line








3. Julien (ESTP) and Sophie (ENFJ) from the movie Love Me If You Dare / Jeux








Songs: Hoobastank -Reason


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## OrangeAppled (Jun 26, 2009)

I choose B for the best option.

a. ESFJ - I don't find ESFJ men drawn to me, nor vice verse. They seem...nice.
*b. ENFJ* - Love 'em...but find it hard to get past the casual friend stage with them.
c. ISTJ - Like many of them as friends, but don't see the "challenge" the description suggests. I would see this relationship becoming the most dull of the options, and maybe resulting in conflict later down the line.


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## Linnifae (Nov 13, 2009)

punky16 said:


> INFp is on the site because that is what Socionics calls it...but in Myers Briggs, it is really an INFJ. They switch the P and J in socionics for the introverts only.


Ah...so here is where my confusion with socionics comes into play. So my husband is an ISTP according to MBTI, so that would make him an ISTj? in socionics? Is this a hard and fast rule because he fits the ISTP description for both kinds of typing better than ISTJ though there are some similarities...


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## punky16 (Nov 9, 2010)

Linnifae said:


> Ah...so here is where my confusion with socionics comes into play. So my husband is an ISTP according to MBTI, so that would make him an ISTj? in socionics? Is this a hard and fast rule because he fits the ISTP description for both kinds of typing better than ISTJ though there are some similarities...


yes he would be istj in socionics but myers briggs he would be istp. But the descriptions are different so he would still be istp. They measure the p and j differently and they say that each description could be for the p or j of that introvert but extroverts keep their same letters.


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## Sonne (Oct 29, 2010)

INFJ-

a. *ENTP*
b. ENFP
c. ISTP


INFP-

a. ESFJ
b. *ENFJ*
c. ISTJ


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## Rez (Nov 6, 2009)

*Choose*

I am an INFP

I would pick ENFJ 

I feel the most comfortable with those NF

I know a lot of extroverts

I believe there a few J's that are in my life but I don't know for sure how many


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## Harley (Jul 5, 2009)

The choices for INTJ are just simply awful IMO. I wouldn't mind having those types as friends (I have known a few ISFP's here and there) but I can't imagine myself being in a long-term relationship with any of those types. I belong more to the like attracts like school of attraction, meaning that in an ideal world my long-term partner would be another INTJ, but for the sake of not evading the question ENTP would be the type I could see myself getting involved with romantically out of the three.


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## RyRyMini (Apr 12, 2010)

*ISFP*

a. ENFJ
-I can only handle so much Fe before I combust not-so-spontaneously. This applies to choice B as well. Though I'm a pretty big fan of Ni and think I could learn a lot from an ENFJ. 
b. ESFJ
-This one worries me. I often feel bulldozed by ESFJs and I think in a relationship I'd feel the same. Not that I need control of everything but I need some sort of input.
c. INTJ
-This pairing definitely interests me, but I think there would naturally be a lot of hurdles to overcome. I generally feel like INTJs don't really care about me or my views on anything (note: this is how I perceive it, may not be reality). But I can't get enough of the NT perspective..basically because it's not me at all.

I like how all of the options are Js because that'd probably be best for me. If I had to pick one, it'd probably be ENFJ. I'd give all of them a shot though.


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## punky16 (Nov 9, 2010)

RyRyMini said:


> *ISFP*
> 
> a. ENFJ
> -I can only handle so much Fe before I combust not-so-spontaneously. This applies to choice B as well. Though I'm a pretty big fan of Ni and think I could learn a lot from an ENFJ.
> ...


Yeah I think I am lucky to have had all three types at one point in my life but I think C is the best option for me...no matter how much I might need to improve my third function.


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## punky16 (Nov 9, 2010)

RyRyMini said:


> *ISFP*
> 
> a. ENFJ
> -I can only handle so much Fe before I combust not-so-spontaneously. This applies to choice B as well. Though I'm a pretty big fan of Ni and think I could learn a lot from an ENFJ.
> ...


Yeah I think I am lucky to have had all three types at one point in my life but I think C is the best option for me...no matter how much I might need to improve my third function. I welcome the challenge!


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## MeAgain (Nov 22, 2010)

I loved the video clips of the couples - so much fun! I'm a nooby so I don't know that I'll have a whole lot of insight into the subject but I was thinking today about the best matches for relationships and it occurred to me that it also depends on what you would like to get out of a relationship. Some people want to make a "team" to go out and accomplish great things in the world, others like to go out and accomplish things then come home to their haven to relax. I am in a new (3 month) relationship with someone I believe is an INFJ and we seem to want to go out and slay our own dragons then come home to each other and cuddle and talk about our day and our dreams, and refresh each other for the next day. So far I like this relationship very much, it feels safe and comfortable. In my last relationship, a marraige of 13 years, we worked together, starting and running businesses together. We accomplished alot but we rarely had the quiet, cuddly time because we were so busy with business stuff. 

Do you think what you want to accomplish in a relationship would affect what type you are attracted to or would your personality type have already determined what you want to get out of a relationship? (I hope that made sense. )


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## MeAgain (Nov 22, 2010)

I was also thinking that TV shows and movies are going to rely on conflict and tension to create drama in the characters relationships; wondering if the two are ever going to get together keeps us watching. If it is just a cute, cozy, comfortable couple we would be bored to death. So as much fun as they are to analyze I don't know if the couples portrayed in hollywood would be the best examples.

Maybe this isn't even the topic we are discussing here. My apologies if I'm in the wrong place.


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## zyzzyva (Nov 19, 2010)

Out of the given options for INFP i'd probably say ISTJ, although I do clash with quite a few ISTJs it's never maliciously and we always seem to bounce back to friend level after a suitable amount of rage has been displaced. Probably wouldn't be a wise choice though, one or the other would crack eventually.


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## punky16 (Nov 9, 2010)

MeAgain said:


> I loved the video clips of the couples - so much fun! I'm a nooby so I don't know that I'll have a whole lot of insight into the subject but I was thinking today about the best matches for relationships and it occurred to me that it also depends on what you would like to get out of a relationship. Some people want to make a "team" to go out and accomplish great things in the world, others like to go out and accomplish things then come home to their haven to relax. I am in a new (3 month) relationship with someone I believe is an INFJ and we seem to want to go out and slay our own dragons then come home to each other and cuddle and talk about our day and our dreams, and refresh each other for the next day. So far I like this relationship very much, it feels safe and comfortable. In my last relationship, a marraige of 13 years, we worked together, starting and running businesses together. We accomplished alot but we rarely had the quiet, cuddly time because we were so busy with business stuff.
> 
> Do you think what you want to accomplish in a relationship would affect what type you are attracted to or would your personality type have already determined what you want to get out of a relationship? (I hope that made sense. )


Absolutely, I mean look at Scully and Mulder in Ex Files...they may not have had a lot of romance like say the Notebook or a Walk to Remember...but it was the best match for them because their jobs required that they needed a lot of healing on a regular basis and so the b relationship is a healing match and the best possible one for them. There is no right answer to this question...I just wanted to show how each awesome relationship has a really big downfall and no relationships live happily ever after, ya know? All of them are hard work. But you may be an ENTP...because INFJ is an A match with ENTP...just a thought.


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## Introspiritual (Mar 12, 2010)

punky16 said:


> yes he would be istj in socionics but myers briggs he would be istp. But the descriptions are different so he would still be istp. They measure the p and j differently and they say that each description could be for the p or j of that introvert but extroverts keep their same letters.


Last letter for introverts in Socionics is determined by strength of preference for judging or perceiving functions. As an INFJ who strongly prefers intuition and barely prefers feeling, I'd be an INFp. Another INFJ who more strongly prefers feeling and weakly prefers intuition would be an INFj. This is one of the main reasons why it generates so much confusion when Socionics gets mixed into MBTI discussions, because it's not a direct 1:1 mapping between the two systems.

As to the original thread and the choices, I'll pick "none of the above" because past relationships with Ps have been problematic at best.


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## Mutatio NOmenis (Jun 22, 2009)

Hand me an ENFJ.


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## punky16 (Nov 9, 2010)

Mutatio NOmenis said:


> Hand me an ENFJ.


You mean ESTJ?


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## punky16 (Nov 9, 2010)

Introspiritual said:


> Last letter for introverts in Socionics is determined by strength of preference for judging or perceiving functions. As an INFJ who strongly prefers intuition and barely prefers feeling, I'd be an INFp. Another INFJ who more strongly prefers feeling and weakly prefers intuition would be an INFj. This is one of the main reasons why it generates so much confusion when Socionics gets mixed into MBTI discussions, because it's not a direct 1:1 mapping between the two systems.
> 
> As to the original thread and the choices, I'll pick "none of the above" because past relationships with Ps have been problematic at best.


It's not that hard...you just have to go by functions for introverts instead of the letters...but my system is based on myers briggs letters and not socionics letters...in fact the only socionics relationship i refer to is the mirage which is either the cohort or the pedagogue depending on type. The other two are the supplement (c relationship) and the contrast (b relationship). And those wouldn't change.


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## Mutatio NOmenis (Jun 22, 2009)

punky16 said:


> You mean ESTJ?


I don't believe in Socionics.


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## amosbanga (Nov 25, 2010)

I'm a bit late coming into this thread, but it made me think...
INTP-

a. ESTJ - Probably not. Haven't had the best experience with this type, but I guess it's not the worst.

b. ENTJ - I think this is the best of the three...not my IDEAL type, but have definitely gone for it in the past.

c. ISFJ - Ugh. Can't see this working at all. Definitely the last one I would choose of the three. Funny it is supposed to be the "best friends" choice, because I don't think I have ANY friends of this type. I have a really bad time with SFJs, mostly because I offend and weird them out way too easily. And they get impatient with me.

I think my ideal would be ENFP or ENTP. I like to have a lot in common with the people I attempt close relationships with, and the E makes things easier for me :tongue: but really any of the NFs or NTs and maybe like ISTP, ESTP...the types I have most difficulty with are generally SJs or SFPs. Just my experience.


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## vel (May 17, 2010)

punky16 said:


> I deleted the opposing websites...so you have had the mirage or illusionary relation...have you had the other two...the supplement/ relation of activity/activation match or the other one...contrast/contrary relation/extinguishment relation? Friend, family or otherwise?


I've experienced all types of relations to various degrees except for identical.
For long-term intimate relations I'd go with dual, activity, and illusionary. There is enough understanding and a romantic spark that help these work.

Extinguishment - somebody posted about extinguishment relations on another forum that they tend to run like this "I've understood you perfectly the first 20 times" and I agree. There is more misunderstanding in them than in illusionary relations because you don't have a single function in common. There is usually mutual attraction but I'll rank them below the above three.

Benefit - I read various things about these and I'll rank them about same as extinguishment and below to the above three types. What I have read about these is that one partner feels like he or she is putting too much into relationship and not getting enough of what they want and the other partner feels like their significant other is contributing too little. Eventually benefactor may get bored of beneficiary or beneficiary might find a better source of what they are looking for than benefactor can provide, then relations may end.

Quasi-identical and semi-dual are great as friends. I get attracted to them quite a bit but there is usually no spark for romance (both of them lack my tertiary function). Great people to talk to and hang around with.

Mirror - good understanding of where the other person is coming from but potential for envy and a bit of competition between the two people. With understanding it is sort of like a game of tag - one person says something and then the other catches up in understanding, and then it happens vice versa. The extravert might seem sort of pushy to the introvert, and the introvert too aloof and disengaged for the extravert.

Supervision - there is always some feeling of distance between the two people. Relations can be good for accomplishing stuff and getting things done. These relations depend on who is the supervisor - if it is the more sensitive feeling type then supervisee will not get criticized as much. I tend to experience a sort of satisfaction carrying out orders of my supervisor (if I respect them) but get put off my supervisees because I always have to suppress a part of myself around them. If you are the supervisor you will have to suppress your dominant function and try to speak to the supervise using only your auxiliary which can get tiring.

Business/Contrary relations - we tend to annoy each other after a while because each person's dominant function is the most 'painful' function of the other person. So eventually one of us starts getting very frustrated with the other. Values may be quite different and understanding never goes too deep.

Super-ego and conflict actually work out ok if your interaction is superficial. But once again we have problems understanding each other and interaction doesn't feel like it brings anything satisfactory/fruitful. These are the type of relations where people end up yelling at each other and at the end still be very much blind to what the other person is saying. My parents have lived for 25+ years in super-ego relations and a few days ago my mom shared with me that she feels like she doesn't really know my dad and sometimes feels like she is living with a stranger. I share a pair of functions with my dad and a pair with my mom and long before I read about MBTI or socionics I felt like I was functioning as a sort of translator/peace-maker between the two.

Generally the vibes that I get from other people tend to go in-line with what socionics predicts. This is why I became interested in this system. Way before I've read about it I knew there were people with whom I felt at a distance, no matter how much we'd interact. Some were members of my family, but I still felt sort of uneasy around them. Reading about socionics I discovered that these are business, super-ego, conflict, and supervisor relations and exploring relationship between functions I could further pinpoint what exactly it was about them that made me feel uneasy. But I've also discovered that apparently I am way too sensitive to my relations with others, and that things that would trigger all kinds of bells in my head other people barely notice, so really this system is not useful for everyone.


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## smoke (Jan 20, 2010)

12. INTP-

*a. ESTJ* yes, definitely
*b. ENTJ* some power conflicts but would sure enjoy it
c. ISFJ - okay I suppose but not really my type

If I were to choose, I'd pick ISTJ - they're my favorite type, especially when they're very smart.


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## Random Ness (Oct 13, 2010)

vel said:


> There is no way a person can use MBTI Ni and socionics Fi.


I'm an MBTI Ni-dominant and a socionics Fi-dominant.................................


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## PJay (Jul 20, 2013)

This is a 3-year-old thread, but I'm still gonna answer! :crazy:
Note: I haven't been able to "study" the personalities, but I'll answer from what I know up to know (from some descriptions and the "You know you're an XXXX when..." threads' first pages of each personality):


ISTJ

a. ESFP: The impression I've got from The Performer is of a child who's always seeking to be the centre of attention, and that can be very annoying for me.
b. ESTP: I really don't want to offend you, but you seem stubborn and a bit arrogant.
c. INFP: The "c" scenario was the one I liked the most and when I saw my option for it was INFP, I thought "Of course! :laughing:". I love XNFPs so far. I think they're perfect for a balance and the idea of keeping my inner child alive is marvelous! :happy:


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## angelicblaze (Oct 5, 2013)

Hey this is a really cool thread.

16. INFP-

a. ESFJ-
b. ENFJ-
c. ISTJ-

Totally the ENFJ. I suppose I might be biased because I am married to a ENFJ, and the thing is I didn't know he was or what I was even before we married, but I felt the most connected with him than anyone I've been with before. Now after researching I understand why. I had a previous marriage and that was a volatile mess that lasted 5 years, I wish I could type him just to see if it was a mismatch in types but I determined that he had to be a sociopath (he used to whisper in my ear in crowded areas that he wished he had a gun to shoot everyone) I'm guessing that is a bit extreme even for an introvert. So obviously, I dealt with alot of crap in that relationship so it was enough to make me desire peace and so I think that is what drew me to my now husband, because being with him was so much peace, and my emotions were met with understanding. He is group b for my type, and that makes complete sense because I really needed peace and calmness in my life.


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## O_o (Oct 22, 2011)

ENTP
*INFJ*: no
*INTJ*: very possibly yes. 
*ESFJ*: hell no. Oh my god, how is this even alright to suggest. This is homicide waiting to happen.

ESTJ. I'd like an ESTJ. ESTJs are the ultimate bombs. I think your screaming Te is beautiful.


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## Calvin (Jun 21, 2012)

ESTJ: Maybe, but the lack of intellectual companionship would kill me. ENTJ: yes. ENTJ women and I share a best-buddy dynamic that would work great in a relationship. ISFJ: Eck! My mom is an ISFJ and I can't imagine being married to one. INFJ? Now that would work, but not ISFJ. I also wonder how ENFJs would fit into this, since they're the type that I'm the most attracted to. They give me much-need autonomy in relationships.


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## candycanebones (Jan 21, 2013)

a. ENFJ
b. ESFJ
c. INTJ

I don't much like these options. Any feeling dominant interaction is just too much feels. I get sick of myself... but still can't stop from perpetuating the cycle. Even with this one INFJ, her Fe just radiates and I find myself smiling constantly like it's my job. And she is too, and I wonder if her cheeks are starting to cramp up as bad as mine are.

INTJ... :crying:


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