# Child Deathmatch!



## Zulban (Nov 11, 2008)

(Poll) How many average seven year olds do you think you could take in a death match? They all have the intent of killing you, in any way possible. Male and female. For some descriptive imagery: they all have blood red eyes! Nobody has any weapons, the terrain completely flat and useless. They surround you. You have to kill or incapacitate them all to win. 

Don't worry; there's no point in telling me this is twisted.


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## NephilimAzrael (Oct 26, 2008)

There exists a quiz on how many five year olds you can take in a fight.
How Many Five Year Olds Could You Take in a Fight?


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## Zulban (Nov 11, 2008)

NephilimAzrael said:


> There exists a quiz on how many five year olds you can take in a fight.
> How Many Five Year Olds Could You Take in a Fight?


Oh sweet deal! I'm going to take it.


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## Trope (Oct 18, 2008)

NephilimAzrael said:


> There exists a quiz on how many five year olds you can take in a fight.
> How Many Five Year Olds Could You Take in a Fight?


Damn, I'm slow today.


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## NephilimAzrael (Oct 26, 2008)

You could take on 33 five year old kids in a fight.

Seven year olds are larger and less resilient than five year olds.. I would go for over 35 of them.


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## de l'eau salée (Nov 10, 2008)

Lol, I think you mistake INFPs for being incapable of violence. That's only a _little_ bit true... if I was being attacked by possessed demonchilds, I would definitely defend myself. I don't react well to violent acts against me. I become an angry INFP. Beware!


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## εmptε (Nov 20, 2008)

*56.* roud:


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## Zulban (Nov 11, 2008)

NephilimAzrael said:


> You could take on 33 five year old kids in a fight.
> 
> Seven year olds are larger and less resilient than five year olds.. I would go for over 35 of them.


I scored 30 on that test. 35? I don't know man, that leaves a lot to grapple you, they just have to hang on, while others gouge your eyes out!


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## Trope (Oct 18, 2008)

The quiz says I could take 31 five year olds, but I figure seven year olds would be harder to use as projectiles, but even so, I that shouldn't drop my count below 21 so I'm in the same bracket.


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## Zulban (Nov 11, 2008)

Actually I'm thinking about it more and I think I should have went for one bracket higher.


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## NephilimAzrael (Oct 26, 2008)

Zulban said:


> I scored 30 on that test. 35? I don't know man, that leaves a lot to grapple you, they just have to hang on, while others gouge your eyes out!


Quick attacks. That and they can be used against eachother. The human body as shield and weapon is a wonderful thing. Grappling is not a problem, considering I have good range and swing. Not to mention, weight is not that difficult to distribute in a manner that is disruptive to effective takedown attempts on their part. 

Are we looking to maintain consciousness, or are they only successful once they kill you?


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## Shai Gar (Jan 4, 2009)

I'm fairly certain I could take at least 60. I wear steelcap boots and I'm willing to give way to violent tendencies.

If I can take my two black belt 13, 15 year old cousins in a fight and win with ease, I can take at least 60 kids. It doesn't take much to take a kid down, their heads and bones are still developing so you could easy break their legs and stomp their faces.


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## Dr. Metallic (Nov 15, 2008)

here is my quiz score. Their heads are at a perfect kicking height XD
Oh, yeah, and I have a wicked kick. Tremendous flexibility.
______

Alright, after a few editing tires, I can't get that damn link to work. It's 24 kids =p


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

Guess what I voted.


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## Viktoria2 (Feb 15, 2009)

snail said:


> Guess what I voted.


None! Never! :wink:


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## mcgooglian (Nov 12, 2008)

I shall take on all comers no matter their age and win.


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## Zulban (Nov 11, 2008)

No steel tipped boots Shai come on 

I'm pretty sure it is difficult to use a fifty pound child who is trying to claw your eyes out as a shield or weapon, without tiring yourself out to fight the other 40. Projectile, I can understand


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## Shai Gar (Jan 4, 2009)

but I ALWAYS wear steelcaps...

Seriously... They're the only shoes I own.


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## Jrquinlisk (Jan 17, 2009)

I could easily take my 13-year-old brother in a fight, so I could probably take at least a dozen or so 7-year-olds. Even so, I'd probably just find the nearest opening and walk away. Quickly, of course.


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## NephilimAzrael (Oct 26, 2008)

Zulban said:


> No steel tipped boots Shai come on
> 
> I'm pretty sure it is difficult to use a fifty pound child who is trying to claw your eyes out as a shield or weapon, without tiring yourself out to fight the other 40. Projectile, I can understand


Not really. You are assuming they have been successful in getting to your eyes. Not to mention. Their limbs are smaller. With the correct timing and size of hands, you could grapple a grip of three arms into one and rotate your centre of gravity to create a horizontal Newton's cradle. I have done it before. Oops, I shouldn't have admitted to that.


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## Shai Gar (Jan 4, 2009)

I'd never use a machette on a zombie. A machette has its use in scaring off other people, and helping to make a staff, and for general building.


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## Zulban (Nov 11, 2008)

Shai Gar said:


> I'd never use a machette on a zombie. A machette has its use in scaring off other people, and helping to make a staff, and for general building.


Excellent. Weapon of choice?


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## Shai Gar (Jan 4, 2009)

Bo Staff, Sniper Rifle, Running like F-ck.


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## Zulban (Nov 11, 2008)

Shai Gar said:


> Bo Staff


Good choice.


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## Shai Gar (Jan 4, 2009)

if it breaks you can replace it, it's got a million uses, you can use it to extend your reach, crush skulls and break limbs. If they cant crawl after you, then you're safe for a very long time.


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## Ti Dominant (Sep 25, 2010)

One child for replacement value, as George Carlin said. :laughing:


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## Night Mare (Oct 30, 2010)

...drat, voted before reading /fail

Well, my vote for zero might still be correct... 1. wouldn't want to have a serious fight against kids (or anyone...) and 2. I find the idea of being attacked by kids kind of creepy - their little claw hands scare me


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## Rogue Eagle (Oct 14, 2009)

going with 6-9. The first few would be nothing and could be thrown headfirst into the ground breaking their skull/necks/spines.

but if they all latched onto seperate limbs and pulled me down while one gouged my eyes out, then I'd be fucked. Don't think it'd get to that though.


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