# The Worst Pick Up Line



## Van (Dec 28, 2009)

Chipps said:


> Asian woman and mixed race women probably get it the worse. I could only imagine the types of stereotypes projected towards them when attempting to pick them up.


I'm half Vietnamese and my worst would have to be "Come show me your slit, I wanna see if it goes sideways!" followed by gross tongue noises. I doubt he was seriously expecting to 'pick me up', though. Just some fucking moron being a fucking moron.
For the record, I was in school uniform (blue sweater over a white blouse, shin-length skirt in blue tartan and roman sandals) so there's no way I'm going to accept the suggestion that _I _was the fucking moron there.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

Chipps said:


> I just love it when the pick up line is chosen based on race. Im black and I hate the way black men think black women want to be picked up. It makes my skin crawl. Asian woman and mixed race women probably get it the worse. I could only imagine the types of stereotypes projected towards them when attempting to pick them up.


It makes it doubly annoying because they are just giving my race a bad name. But I guess they think that they have some sort of "in" according to race? I'm sorry but I don't feel that I was even raised on the same planet as them.


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## Erudis (Jan 23, 2011)

Chipps said:


> "ay yo, let me holla at you".


I can't believe people actually say that! :laughing:

I bet he looked like this:


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## Chipps (Jun 1, 2011)

Erudis said:


> I can't believe people actually say that! :laughing:
> 
> I bet he looked like this:



lol. They always have that creepy shit eating grin on their faces. Stay the hell away from them.


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## ilphithra (Jun 22, 2010)

Erudis said:


> I can't believe people actually say that! :laughing:


Should I tell you a few of the ones I get in Portuguese? They can be just as bad...


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## Erudis (Jan 23, 2011)

ilphithra said:


> Should I tell you a few of the ones I get in Portuguese? They can be just as bad...


Oh, please do!


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## ilphithra (Jun 22, 2010)

Erudis said:


> Oh, please do!


I'll hand you a few not only that I got but that some friends got too.

- Que belas pernas! A que horas abrem?
- Oh boa, com um cú desses, deves cagar bonbons!
- Oh fêvera, junta-te aqui à brasa!
- Usas cuecas TMN? Tens um rabinho que é um mimo! (Nota: Nós dizemos cuecas em vez de calcinha).
- Só queria que fosses uma pastilha elástica para te comer o dia todo.
- És como a lareira, cabe sempre mais um pau.

Does anyone want translations of this sad affair?


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

ilphithra said:


> I'll hand you a few not only that I got but that some friends got too.
> 
> - Que belas pernas! A que horas abrem?
> - Oh boa, com um cú desses, deves cagar bonbons!
> ...


I think I got bonbons covered.


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## ilphithra (Jun 22, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> I think I got bonbons covered.


Wish it were that nice... I'll translate so you and the rest of the peeps can have an insight to this sad affair. Do please bear in mind that it might not be a perfect translation due to language quirks.
*
- Que belas pernas! A que horas abrem?* Nice legs! When do they spread? _(lit would be: at what time do they open up)_
*- Oh boa, com um cú desses, deves cagar bonbons! *Hey gorgeous, with such an ass you must be shitting bonbons!
*- Oh fêvera, junta-te aqui à brasa! *Hey beef, come join the hot coals! _(lit would be: Hey Pork steak... the rest stays the same)_
*- Usas cuecas TMN? Tens um rabinho que é um mimo!*_(Nota: Nós dizemos cuecas em vez de calcinha)_. Do you wear TMN panties? You have on sweet ass! _(TMN is a mobile phone brand in Portugal, Mimo was a type of call rates. The rest is a note explaining how we say panties in Portuguese because a different word is used in Brazilian Portuguese)._
*- Só queria que fosses uma pastilha elástica para te comer o dia todo.* I wish you were chewing gum so I could eat you all day.
*- És como a lareira, cabe sempre mais um pau.* You're like a fireplace, there's always room for another stick.


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## Finaille (Aug 8, 2010)

I always thought pick up lines were funny, but if I had men spouting sexual lines at me I'm sure I would be pretty annoyed too. Wish I knew how to suggest making the men leave you alone. I've learned that if I don't look at them ahead of time, that seems to prevent them wanting to chat you up.

Also, I always gathered that if a man struck up a pick up line, that likely meant he was just trying to make you laugh and break the ice. I would be very shocked if a man would actually expect me to take a pick up line (a non-sexual, witty one) seriously. The most clever one I've been told was one I actually used to try to ask my husband on a date when we first started showing interest in each other.

'Got any raisins? No? How about a date?'


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## Hruberen (Jan 2, 2012)

I've been dropped a line before, don't remember what it was, but the girl wouldn't own up to it.


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## Erudis (Jan 23, 2011)

@ilphithra I don't know if I should laugh, get angry, or facepalm myself right now. If the Guinness ever decide to create an award for the most tactless person in the world, we already have the candidates.


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## JackParrish (May 5, 2012)

Not a fully accurate statement of some of the (interesting) ideas that have come out in this thread, and definitely a more extreme application of the ideas, but still I think appropriate:


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## donkeybals (Jan 13, 2011)

Hmm, do girls have pick up lines? Like, I don't think I ever heard a cheesy pick up line from a girl, like "Are you an angel, cause I'm in heaven!" Wait do guys even say that, or is that just in movies? Haha

Okay, here's a story, not really a pick up line. But way back when, when I was still in grammar school, me and a friend were at the mall. And some random stranger came up to us and pointed to this girl and said she had a crush on me. We both kind of were like what? So we kind of just ignored the comment and walked around. And every store we went into they were there lol. And in the end, the girl's friend came over to us after about an hour and said. We've been following you into every store, do you like my friend or what?! I was like, uh, well, I don't think so. She left, and came back and said she said go fuck a pom pom. And that was one of my first experiences with the opposite sex.

The end.


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## ilphithra (Jun 22, 2010)

Erudis said:


> @_ilphithra_ I don't know if I should laugh, get angry, or facepalm myself right now. If the Guinness ever decide to create an award for the most tactless person in the world, we already have the candidates.


I think it's safe to do all 3. There are even worse ones than what I posted...


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## Erbse (Oct 15, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> Okay, then I'll give you props. I do place a higher value on humor than appropriateness. But these guys I'm talking about would have bad timing if that's what they were going for. And being terrible with humor is just as bad, if not worse in my book. But I assure you that was not their true motivation.


There are 3 possible reactions:

1. They're shocked / offended.
2. They tag along.
3. They reply in a highly sarcastic manner.

2. and 3. are intriguing. 1. is boring, but hilarious.


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## LotusBlossom (Apr 2, 2011)

> What sort of shitty pick up lines have you received?


something to the effect of:
*Your legs must be tired, because you've been running through my mind all night*

AT FIRST I THOUGHT HE WAS KIDDING!!!!

....but he wasn't

Sorry I laughed. I didnt' mean to embarrass him! I thought he was really kidding!


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## L (Aug 12, 2011)

@_pinkrasputin_

I liked the smile one, I just added a new one to my growing list of 2!

The other one would be to the effect of this "I saw you and I would kick myself later if I didn't come say hi...hello"

i is so newb lol.

EDIT: I told a friend he should have used this one after he tripped going up the stares when he locked eyes with someone (I wasn't actually there):
"you should have told her 'your beauty made me trip'" :laughing:


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## paper lilies (Dec 6, 2011)

"I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your Bed Rock."
"Fuck me if I'm wrong but is your name (insert rare name here)?" 
"Is that Windex? Because I can see myself in your pants."
"Hi, my name is Pogo, want to jump on my stick?"
"The word for the night is legs, let's go back to my room and spread the word."
"Hi my name is _______, remember it, cause you'll be screaming it all night long."
"If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg Christmas, can I visit you between the Holidays?"

Pick up lines are not a smart move if you're actually tying to pick up a woman in my opinion.
If they're actually used in a serious situation I'm fairly certain the words "LOL FAIL" are a given.


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## nottie (Mar 2, 2011)

Mostly I just find them funny, and I give the guys the benefit of the doubt. I was only ever offended when a guy tried to pick me up by favorably comparing me to another girl.. she was standing _right there_, and he was forever branded as an asshat in my mind. 

When guys say things about my body it does feel awkward, but I usually just laugh and walk away.



Kayness said:


> something to the effect of:
> *Your legs must be tired, because you've been running through my mind all night*
> 
> AT FIRST I THOUGHT HE WAS KIDDING!!!!
> ...


This exactly happened to me! A few minutes later the guy tried again with, "is your name Gillette, because you're the best a man can get!"

It's really shocking how much he wasn't kidding. I felt quite bad for laughing at the moment, but dude. How else could I react?


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## Michael82 (Dec 13, 2010)

ambiguous entity said:


> ”Do you work at subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong.”


Cynical comeback:
"Yeah, want the sandwich of the day? Crabs and tuna."


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## eternalsolitude (Jun 18, 2012)

I can relate, I run in my neighborhood too.
But I'm in Queens, and I have guys approach me. 
The honk, the whistle, driving slowly to check out ass, yell obscenities.


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## Tristan427 (Dec 9, 2011)

Hey baby, see what's missing here? Sex_al harass__nt. All that's missing is u and me.


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## Kormoran (Mar 15, 2012)

"Were your parents retards? 'Cause you sure are special!" - Robin Williams

Well, at least the guy gave pinkrasputin a compliment. He commented on her nice ass, so I think she should've commented on his nice tits, or bad breath, in return.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

eternalsolitude said:


> I can relate, I run in my neighborhood too.
> But I'm in Queens, and I have guys approach me.
> The honk, the whistle, driving slowly to check out ass, yell obscenities.


Omg Queens. I used to live in Manhattan, and have been through Queens. Bad enough. My blood used to boil.


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## BeauGarcon (May 11, 2011)

You're a fucking ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death, and then play around with your blood.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

BeauGarcon said:


> You're a fucking ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death, and then play around with your blood.


Where did you hear this from?


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## Kormoran (Mar 15, 2012)

pinkrasputin said:


> Where did you hear this from?


The voices in his head, I think.


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## Cover3 (Feb 2, 2011)

wow, that guy has a severe case of boneheaditite.. x)


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## BeauGarcon (May 11, 2011)

Lol... Cover, I know your agenda you capitalist thug. 

@_Cormo_: RIP... Waw confused by something. I mean: gratz... Atleast the 'gratz' was in Belgium, not sure about the other countries.


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## SocioApathetic (May 20, 2012)

@pinkrasputin, @Cormo, @Cover3, that is a pretty horrible pick-up line. Gotta give him that, at least.


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## Snakecharmer (Oct 26, 2010)

This guy I used to work with (he was fired recently, thank gods) used to just walk right out of our office to chase down women. He'd say things like "You really know how to fill out those jeans". Blech. Made me sick. No wonder his wife left him. 

When my son was a baby, I used to go to one of those huge chain gyms...this young guy used to constantly hit on me. I tried ignoring him, but finally lost my temper and ended up screaming at him in the lobby. :angry: He followed me around for awhile and finally asked me out...I said no and told him that I was married (I was at the time). He said, "So? I don't care! I just really like redheads..." That's when I lost it...


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## sofort99 (Mar 27, 2010)

Just for the record, if a woman ever came up to me and said "Wow! nice ass!", *my* reply would just be:

"Thanks!!! ...Want to touch it?"


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## Pachacutie (Aug 27, 2010)

I never go out to bars, but my best friend was in town and had just gotten engaged. I was having one beer that tasted vaguely of bile and this "wedding party" was out. This guy sat beside me and would not leave me alone, telling me "I wasn't looking like I was having any fun..." The like, maybe 4 times I've been out... I've heard this. It's really kind of rude, because it's basically telling me I look grumpy and that I need interaction with someone like him to have fun.

He keeps talking, I'm just being polite and boring and hoping he goes away and he says, "Want to hear the worst pick up line ever?"

I had no clue what he actually said, so I just said, "Uh, I guess." And he said something along the lines of "My dick just died." I said, naively and confused, "I'm sorry? That's no fun." Then he finishes up with the knee slapper, "Can I bury it in your ass?" 

I really contemplated saying, "Really? My penis is doing just fine." 

And I would've, but, he was just too close in my face and I didn't want to interact with him anymore.

Oh, drunk people. Pick up lines are awful. Just talk to people like they're human beings. I'm aware that it's probably harder than it sounds to approach someone, considering I have minor social anxiety, but... come on.


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## Christie (Feb 20, 2012)

pinkrasputin:2598693 said:


> WARNING: This post contains crude behavior.
> 
> I'm writing this thread more as an educational device. However, I think most men (or women) here on PerC may not need lessons in suave pick-up lines. Actually, I hope most people here approach someone with the idea of "conversation starter" as opposed to a "pick up line".
> 
> ...


Girlfriend, you are so on the money with this post it ain't even funny!!!


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## Kormoran (Mar 15, 2012)

BeauGarcon said:


> Lol... Cover, I know your agenda you capitalist thug.
> 
> @_Cormo_: RIP... Waw confused by something. I mean: gratz... Atleast the 'gratz' was in Belgium, not sure about the other countries.


Not quite sure what you mean here, and I don't know what gratz means.


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## BeauGarcon (May 11, 2011)

Cormo said:


> Not quite sure what you mean here, and I don't know what gratz means.


Gratz is the elegant way to say congratulations. Jean-Paul Belmondo is what I meant.


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## Christie (Feb 20, 2012)

Here's something that peeves me to no end that I experienced. I had a married man come up to me at work while I was alone. He walks up to me, gives me the stare down, and says, "You are very pretty. Do you know that?" This same guy is always complaining to me about his relationship woes. (To which I reply, "You should try to work things out with your wife.") If this was an isolated incident, I may have given him the benefit of the doubt, but this is one of many from him. I mean, HELLO!!!! Do I have 'make me your mistress' written on my forehead?!?! Being married and hitting on women, not cool. Not to mention, if you are doing that to your wife now, why would I believe you wouldn't do that again in the future. Seriously. >_<

Side note: I know this isn't technically a 'line', but still sleeze worthy, IMO.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

sofort99 said:


> Just for the record, if a woman ever came up to me and said "Wow! nice ass!", *my* reply would just be:
> 
> "Thanks!!! ...Want to touch it?"


How often do women come up to you and do this? 

And do you recommend that pick up line to be used on men?


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## sofort99 (Mar 27, 2010)

Never.

Yes.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

sofort99 said:


> Never.
> 
> Yes.


Would you marry the woman who first approached you with "Hey Baby, you have a nice ass"?

How did your wife approach you, if she didn't compliment your ass?


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## Anthoric (May 31, 2012)

"Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"

Friend of mine said he used that and it actually worked. Dunno if it's true. The idea of anyone actually being 'picked up' by a pickup line kind of sickens me in a "no hope for anything" way.

I had a guy try to pick me up on a dating site I'm a member of, he said he could "Really show me some things". And I thought "Yeah, I could show you some things too, like what it's like to get hit in the dick with a hammer."

I don't use pickup lines, I just be myself and if it works out it works out, if it dosen't, it dosen't. Though I am much more charming behind a computer screen, I've never seen a girl and charmed her in person without talking to her behind this screen first. Dunno what it is really....I guess I'm awkard as hell in person,


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## sofort99 (Mar 27, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> Would you marry the woman who first approached you with "Hey Baby, you have a nice ass"?
> 
> How did your wife approach you, if she didn't compliment your ass?


I was in the army, and dating an officer's daughter, a stripper, and a bar tender from a bar on the other end of town. I went to a little out of the way place on night for beer, and they all three showed up at the same time looking for me.

After *that* was all over with, some hot chick sent me a pitcher of beer. She said she just wanted to see what the fuss was all about. We moved in together a week later, and were married two months later. 

And that's been over twenty years ago.


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## JackParrish (May 5, 2012)

sofort99 said:


> I was in the army, and dating an officer's daughter, a stripper, and a bar tender from a bar on the other end of town. I went to a little out of the way place on night for beer, and they all three showed up at the same time looking for me.
> 
> After *that* was all over with, some hot chick sent me a pitcher of beer. She said she just wanted to see what the fuss was all about. We moved in together a week later, and were married two months later.
> 
> And that's been over twenty years ago.


I am speechless. That was awesome. I did not expect to read that.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

sofort99 said:


> I was in the army, and dating an officer's daughter, a stripper, and a bar tender from a bar on the other end of town. I went to a little out of the way place on night for beer, and they all three showed up at the same time looking for me.
> 
> After *that* was all over with, some hot chick sent me a pitcher of beer. She said she just wanted to see what the fuss was all about. We moved in together a week later, and were married two months later.
> 
> And that's been over twenty years ago.


Oh army. Was she a civilian?

Fuck, my recent ex MS hit on me first. Maybe that is why we didn't work out? He said, "You're hot!". And then I conversed with him simply to teach him a lesson about not approaching women this way. Then I ended up in a relationship with him  

But that relationship is over now because I never sent him a pitcher of beer in the beginning and he approached me first, I'm thinking. :dry:

Another army man has approached me so once again I didn't get a chance to buy him a pitcher. His first approach was much more elegant and respectful. It was more of a conversation starter. I taught his unit aerobics and he had some very positive things to say about what his unit thought of me. Now he wants to take me to sushi. Are we doomed? I want this one to make an honest woman out of me. He added me to his Facebook and I've stalked it. He is quite the full package and seems quite perfect for me. Or the me I'll be a while from now. Lol.

Now our sushi date is about 8 months away. He's part of my long-term plan. :wink: I figure that gives me enough time to prepare wanting to become an honest woman. :laughing:

But is it too late? Have we already started off wrong? Can a pitcher even help us at this point? What is the equivalent to a Facebook pitcher? I'm not very competitive, but I have noticed other bitches be writing. Usually I'll just drop a guy when that happens and move onto the next. But now your wife's methods has me intrigued. I think I'll fight for what's mine. Ha!


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## bigtex1989 (Feb 7, 2011)

Worst pick-up line ever: "Someone better call heaven, because a hottie is arriving there tonight!"


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## Rift (Mar 12, 2012)

the worst pickup lines are best for chicks ... women are more prone to expect a line, even when it's not a line and there's more than a few that tend to overreact at just saying hello... so better to strike out the first and aim for a recovery... to jump over that first hurdle or get a pass from the armed militia atop their social barriers ready to kill anything that gets near.

Dudes on the other hand -- well, at least, when it's coming from another dude and more predominate in the nsa cruising scenes -- prefer a dude with ulterior motives (a joint, a cig, a beer, blue balls, coming over to 'watch the game'; some form of social prostitution that undermines any mutual attraction as a cracker jack prize and sets up a time limit for the 'cum and go' scenario)... I guess it lessens the whole **** shame or the drama (the horror stories more often attached to lesbians and uhauls) that once you get them off, they're going want to cuddle and cry, and you're never going to be able to get rid of them. So unless they're a twink to which under most scenarios chick rules apply, they're generally more cool with anything that says 'I want to use you like a cheap sex toy and toss you in the bin when I'm done' 

With chicks in the public scene.. it's not so much what they say but their actions... I really don't mind forwardness and in some scenes it's expected, but generally I prefer _some warning_ before I'm being smothered by someone's well endowed bosom, gasping for air and having trouble getting my inhaler out of the jeans use a pair of pliers just to get on. I suppose, though, that was more my fault for dressing that way or worst yet when I've chosen to wear a kilt in public... to which many (particularly american) women seem to have trouble controlling themselves around. Though the latter is probably less out of interest than just general 'fair play' and 'ptsd' from dudes viewing them as sexual objects, although significantly less grabby, still visually molesting them everywhere. 

I haven't really gotten many pickup lines from chicks outside of conventions and events where it's intended more camp than an actual come on.. when she's trying to make her boyfriend/ex boyfriend jealous or entertain her friends... in the public (or even online) scene. 

the cheesy pickup lines seem more in play when there's romantic interests in the air, however when they're interested in getting it on... more often it's the disguised ulterior motive that I'm usually too dense in recognizing it's actually a pick up line... "do you want to come over and see my artwork?" or asking if I want to join a yoga class with her, which turned out to be a naked yoga class and even then I may have remained a bit dense to her intentions... and it was three weeks before she eventually broke down and told me. "Oh. wait... Oh. Okay, sure."

I've had the same trouble with blokes too... though it's more the socially entwined situations than the outright you make my pants pound harder than bass line in the club scenarios. 

Although in fetish circles... a lot of people could do better without talking while standing aloof to the side.


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## Rinori (Apr 8, 2012)

"We should blow this joint and then each other" lmao saw that one in a movie couldnt stop laughing. I would never use an insulting pick upline infact i dont even use pick up lines.


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## sofort99 (Mar 27, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> Oh army. Was she a civilian?


She was still in, but was just getting out.


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## SilentScream (Mar 31, 2011)

I once got a PM from someone who said something that I didn't like it at all. I know she didn't intend to flirt or whatever - but it was very close to crossing my boundary of what I consider appropriate conduct with me personally.

I used to have all kinds of passing comments about my "cuteness" and "hotness" by giggling schoolgirls in high school and even had a major cat-calling incident once while I was out on a walk with my mom which embarrassed the heck out of me ... In fact, I stopped roller-blading at night for a while after that.

Once a girl in my college started flirting with me on the very first day ... she was one of those who kinda used her body to seduce. Would get right up close and make all sorts of sultry movements and talk in an extremely flirty tone. Me being the total straight talker pointed out to her that her nose was disproportionately large - which put some much needed distance between us. It was funny watching her go from flirtatious to furious 

I really don't know why men AND women behave in this way ... what they hope to achieve. I've never approached a single woman in my life with any intent except to have a meaningful conversation and I expect the same courtesy in return.


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## poisonpinkpony (May 29, 2012)

"Are you a virgin?", "How big is your bed?" and "Are you good in bed?", all from the same guy, within one minute. That was _really _smooth.


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## firedell (Aug 5, 2009)

Men beeping horns and shouting out of windows *shudders*. 

I once had this guy smacking my arse in a club, I should have slapped him but I was so suprised by it. I just said "Piss off." and walked away. Then he thought it be darn hilarious to follow me around saying "You're hot". Thankfully my male friend was around, and was sober enough to deal with the situation. 

I was so confused by the situation I had no clue what to do. Since I had never had anyone be so much of a dick.


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## Palaver (Jan 5, 2010)

Why do men act the way they do? Because women reward them for it. It is not appropriate to blame men as if they are the cause.

Nothing in nature exists of its own accord. These pickup lines work on some women. Men preferring quantity over quality, you know they've been tested. This isn't particular to humans, but to other species. Birds are a terrific example. The evolution of the male plumage is shaped by the mating preferences of females. Think of man's tools of seduction, his looks and his words, as his plumage, his signal of higher mating value. They are both shaped or encouraged by what females find attractive.

You are not running into "stupid" men. You are actually encounter men (and their behavior) that other females find attractive. Their adaptability and responsiveness is actually an intelligence--that I unfortunately lack.


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## chimeric (Oct 15, 2011)

The most ridiculous I've gotten:

"Looks like you got pretty _wet_ out in that weather, girl... I noticed your cellphone _bulging_ in your pocket. Think I could give you a call sometime?"


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## INTJellectual (Oct 22, 2011)

pinkrasputin said:


> I hate men honking their car horns, too. What is this behavior, btw? Why would men honk their horns when they see a pretty girl? It makes absolutely no sense. Is the honking stemming from some mating ritual I don't know about. They go by you and honk. They want you to look up. What the hell is this behavior??


I LOL'd at this one. It's very funny:laughing:. I thought only some men do honk in a certain region. Now I know men in all culture do this in general to impress (but to me it's so annoying). The way you put your words is so funny btw, but I think you are serious in making this thread. I encounter this too many times not just with car honking but with motorcycle honking as well. And the worst part is that you are walking at the very side of the street just for have them to go in the middle and yet they go with your direction and honk and say "hi baby". It's so rude!


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## L (Aug 12, 2011)

Palaver said:


> Why do men act the way they do? Because women reward them for it. It is not appropriate to blame men as if they are the cause.
> 
> Nothing in nature exists of its own accord. These pickup lines work on some women. Men preferring quantity over quality, you know they've been tested. This isn't particular to humans, but to other species. Birds are a terrific example. The evolution of the male plumage is shaped by the mating preferences of females. Think of man's tools of seduction, his looks and his words, as his plumage, his signal of higher mating value. They are both shaped or encouraged by what females find attractive.
> 
> You are not running into "stupid" men. You are actually encounter men (and their behavior) that other females find attractive. Their adaptability and responsiveness is actually an intelligence--that I unfortunately lack.


Actually, I think that the Alpha males created pickup lines and gave them to the Beta males to fuck themselves over thus leaving more for the Alphas.


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## Palaver (Jan 5, 2010)

L said:


> Actually, I think that the Alpha males created pickup lines and gave them to the Beta males to fuck themselves over thus leaving more for the Alphas.


Ha! That's just like a Beta male to blame someone else for their personal failing!

I kid. I don't like the Alpha/Beta, blue/red pill analogy. It's best not to think in mythologies if you hope to arrive at concrete facts and real nature of things. For example, pick up artists get rejected all the time--much more than other men--from the simple fact that they try more often. It's a numbers game (lottery) as much as it is a language game. It's the same for birds. Sitting pretty isn't enough. Even with their magnificent plumage, the birds of paradise must dedicate great time, energy, and risk (from predators) into their mating rituals.

Maybe some of the male birds of paradise (aware of the personal risks) think that this flashy display is a completely irrational way of propagating their species. And it is because having an attractive plumage is currently leading to their extinction at the hands of humans. But it doesn't matter what any male thinks because the decision isn't theirs. So long as a few males are willing to jump through the hoops, the program remains unchanged.

One day, I do hope a similar situation occurs with alien observers from outer space, should they chance a visit. Aliens might take a particular fascination in the mating ritual of the male pickup artist. Pick up artists would make great wall mounts in any extraterrestrial collection. Alas, a nerd can only dream... this science fiction.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

Palaver said:


> Why do men act the way they do? Because women reward them for it. It is not appropriate to blame men as if they are the cause.
> 
> Nothing in nature exists of its own accord. These pickup lines work on some women. Men preferring quantity over quality, you know they've been tested. This isn't particular to humans, but to other species. Birds are a terrific example. The evolution of the male plumage is shaped by the mating preferences of females. Think of man's tools of seduction, his looks and his words, as his plumage, his signal of higher mating value. They are both shaped or encouraged by what females find attractive.
> 
> You are not running into "stupid" men. You are actually encounter men (and their behavior) that other females find attractive. Their adaptability and responsiveness is actually an intelligence--that I unfortunately lack.


I think a smart man would have known his audience and would have known better that there is no way in hell those lines would work on me. He was an idiot and did not achieve the connection he was seeking, which also makes him a failure.


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## stone100674 (Jun 22, 2012)

Warning: this is the worst pick up line I know and it is rude. I am putting in here for humor only: Pardon me I am conducting a survey
on the taste of different vaginas: would you care to participate?


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## bigtex1989 (Feb 7, 2011)

A woman used this one on me last night. "You look like you want to buy me a drink" I laughed at the gall.


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

bigtex1989 said:


> A woman used this one on me last night. "You look like you want to buy me a drink" I laughed at the gall.


She probably wasn't trying to pick you up. I think she was just wanting you to buy her a drink. Think I'll do that tonight.


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## bigtex1989 (Feb 7, 2011)

pinkrasputin said:


> She probably wasn't trying to pick you up. I think she was just wanting you to buy her a drink. Think I'll do that tonight.


I'm inclined to disagree based on the remainder of that night XD


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

bigtex1989 said:


> I'm inclined to disagree based on the remainder of that night XD


So this wasn't a bad pick up line? I'm confused.


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## bigtex1989 (Feb 7, 2011)

pinkrasputin said:


> So this wasn't a bad pick up line? I'm confused.


It was terrible. One of the worst I've ever heard. No she didn't pick me up, but she tried lol. I would have rather heard "nice ass". Maybe that's because I think my butt is under appreciated. Even with the lack of support, it still just won't quit.


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## Dashboard Hula Dancer (Jun 24, 2012)

You are just like a country road... soft shoulders and lots of curves. (I fell for this btw) UGH


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## koalaroo (Nov 25, 2011)

Resurrecting this thread.

Got this gem on OKCupid last night:

"On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?"


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## MisterD (Feb 24, 2010)

The line doesn't matter, it's how you say it & the confidence behind it that does.


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## koalaroo (Nov 25, 2011)

MisterD said:


> The line doesn't matter, it's how you say it & the confidence behind it that does.


The line still matters. If you use a standard pickup line (say something corny as fuck), I tell you to go fuck yourself. Most women are the same way, just more polite. I'm just worse: I laugh in your face.


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## monemi (Jun 24, 2013)

'Get in the car or I'll stuff you in the trunk.' 

It was a joke. Don't worry. But still, damn. That would be one hell of a pick up line.


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## monemi (Jun 24, 2013)

MisterD said:


> The line doesn't matter, it's how you say it & the confidence behind it that does.


LOL! No. It doesn't work like that. You have to have a lot more going on than confidence for that to work. You need a really dumb girl, great looks, charm and confidence.


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## MisterD (Feb 24, 2010)

I'm talking from personal experience. It goes both ways, I doubt there is a line I can say that 100 percent makes a woman drop her panties and jump on my dick.


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