# Fairly certain what my type is, though still struggling a bit. Would love some help!



## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

I will be using the alternate questions and also not going to mention what types I have received when taking the test, in case my answers say something different about me to you guys. I don't want to influence your answers.
Also discussion of substance abuse, alcohol, suicide, and self-harm if that bothers you at all.

I am also extremely verbose so I apologize if this gets quite long.


*0. Is there anything that may affect the way you answer the questions? For example, a stressful time, mental illness, medications, special life circumstances? Other useful information includes sex, age, and current state of mind.
*
I have been diagnosed with bipolar II (though to avoid stigma on my records it's just "mood disorder" - and because of that depression), anxiety, OCD, ADHD, insomnia, and I experience dissociation when I have a breakdown. I had a dependency/addiction to ambien for a couple years, and have finally stopped taking it entirely. Nearly became an alcoholic about 2-3 years ago. Was at my worst mentally about 2 1/2 years ago, overdosing on antidepressants and benzos, and cutting. I'm 27 years old, female, living at home with my parents for almost the past 3 years (originally for my own safety but now it makes more financial sense- I own a business and my workshop is owned by my parents and it's less than a mile from our home). Mentally I am miles better than I used to be, but I still struggle especially since I have little to no social life and also less privacy than I did when I was alone. I love my family more than anything though, so the idea of leaving again is a little scary.


*1. Click on this link: Flickr: Explore! Look at the random photo for about 30 seconds. Copy and paste it here, and write about your impression of it.
*
It's telling me I am not allowed to post images or links yet because my post count is too low, so I will just say that I am looking at the first image of the "Explore" tab, which is called "Temples of the Harvest" by Pietro Faccioli. 

It's a really lovely photo... a little eerie, but I like that. Whatever lens he used (I don't know much about photography other than the little I learned in high school, though I'm hoping to learn more soon) gives it a really fascinating sort of distorted view. I should ask my friend what he used. The looming grey clouds over the buildings are so foreboding, especially since far behind them above the mountaintops it looks very clear and blue. I quite like old, decrepit buildings, so this a very neat image for me. Not one that I would want to spend more than that 30 seconds looking at, but seeing it in passing makes me think "Oh, that's a nice shot. I like the mood of it."


*2. You are with a group of people in a car, heading to a different town to see your favourite band/artist/musician. Suddenly, the car breaks down for an unknown reason in the middle of nowhere. What are your initial thoughts? What are your outward reactions?
*

Initial thoughts: Frustration! I hope we can get this fixed and make it there on time. If it were my car and I didn't know what was wrong with it, I would be thinking, oh god, what did I do? Did I mess something up? My father is going to be so mad at me... If it's not my car, I would hope the person driving or someone else would be knowledgeable about how to get it running again, or has AAA. Hopefully we left early enough to still get there on time. I'll be really sad if I can't see this artist. I also don't want to be out the money I spent on the ticket. 

Outward reactions: If it were my car - I would cry. I would cry out of frustration and worry that everyone else is disappointed with me because of my vehicle, that they put their trust in me to get them to the concert on time, and I have failed them. I would also cry out of guilt because I would probably end up calling my dad to ask for help or see if he could come check on the car, and I would feel really bad about having him do it because he is generous enough that he would go out of his way to come help me. If it's not my car - I would be anxious, but supportive. I would do whatever I could to help my friend figure out what's wrong with their vehicle and either offer to help fix it, if we figure it out, or look up as much information on my phone as possible/read through the owner's manual (provided they have it) to see if I can get the answers they need. I would try to keep my calm and not make my friend feel any worse about the situation especially since they probably couldn't help it.


*3. You somehow make it to the concert. The driver wants to go to the afterparty that was announced (and assure you they won't drink so they can drive back later). How do you feel about this party? What do you do?
*

If this is a person I can trust won't drink, I will stay. I can take care of myself, so even if I don't believe they will abstain, I can always try and find a hotel to stay at if I'm not comfortable with anyone driving me back. 

Either that or if I am just not feeling up to partying that night, I'll be the designated driver myself.


*4. On the drive back, your friends are talking. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward reaction? What do you outwardly say?
*

It all depends on what beliefs are being discussed and how strongly I feel about it. Inwardly, I would be a little annoyed. I would weigh the pros and cons of saying something to them, and how close our friendship is and how the others in the car would view me after I spoke my mind. 

Outwardly, if it's something that I feel is a very hurtful thing they are saying, I'd speak up, but try and make it a calm, intelligent debate. I don't like when things get heated. I avoid conflict. If it has to do with religion- I'll keep my mouth shut. I don't care what others' beliefs are, and I doubt they care about mine. So it doesn't matter. If it's say, a sexist, homophobic, or racist remark, I would probably try and point out why what they are saying is harmful and why I disagree. If it's about a situation where people are very divided on and is an extremely hot topic, especially one where I happen to be in the minority regarding my opinions on the topic, I will not get involved. It's not worth it to create tension over something like that. All in all, if I do open my mouth and speak my opinions (and I certainly have a lot of them), in the end I try to make sure the discussion/debate (I never want to create an argument, though I enjoy a good, intelligent, reasonable, and rational argument) ends with everyone understanding that while they may feel strongly one way, they have friends that do not agree with them, and that's okay. Having friends that all think the same way you do is very boring.


*5. What would you do if you actually saw/experienced something that clashes with your previous beliefs, experiences, and habits?
*

Again, it really depends on what it is and how strongly I feel about it, and also who is involved. Most of the time I try to keep my mouth shut or remove myself from the situation. If it's something I feel strongly about, I don't fear for my safety, and no one is involved whom I wouldn't want to burn bridges with, I may speak up. I am opinionated but I try to understand when the appropriate times to bring my opinions up are.


*6. What are some of your most important values? How did you come about determining them? How can they change?
*

Family, love, being true to myself, intelligence, generosity, happiness, creativity. Those are the first ones I can think of, anyway. I don't know how I came about determining them. They're just things I've always valued. I think as I got older I learned I valued family above all else, because as usual teenagers are rather annoyed with their parents. Once I spent time away from them, and learned that all the lessons they tried to teach me were valuable and correct, I appreciated them much more. Thanks to my anxiety I am also always worried about my father's health, especially after his eldest brother passed from a heart attack nearly 3 years ago. So I try to value my time with him and I fear losing him the most. 

Being true to myself, intelligence, happiness, and creativity have always been at the core of my values since I was very young. They are just a huge part of who I am and there's not a whole lot I can say about where they came from. I was a very cynical and depressed teenager, so love was not necessarily far up there. Now as I get older, I realize that love is really all I truly need in life. It also ties in with my family- family wouldn't be first if I didn't love them so much. Happiness is clearly also important, and without it I may not still be here, but my family gives me happiness, as does love. If I do not feel I am loved and if I did not have my family, I'm not sure how easily I could achieve happiness. 

Generosity is not really something I think about... I just sort of do it. I want the people around me to know that they are appreciated and loved. I am an extremely lazy, disorganized, messy person, and so while my mother says that helping around the house and keeping things clean and whatnot is a good way for me to show I love her, it's not exactly at the forefront of my thoughts when it comes to showing her my feelings. I tend to be more verbally affectionate than physically, so I try to tell my family and friends how much they mean to me and that I love them when I can. I also enjoy giving gifts and surprising people.

I don't know if they can fully change. I think that I will always have those values, but there's a possibility for adding more, or maybe slightly tweaking some. For example, intelligence has a different meaning to me now than it did when I was younger. Back then, I think it meant something more like "maturity", "knowledge", and "understanding". For me now, it means "maturity", "resourcefulness", "rationale/logical thinking", "wisdom", and "common sense". I have met plenty of people over the years that have vast amounts of knowledge and understanding about one or many topics, but I would not necessarily consider them "intelligent". 

*7. a) What about your personality most distinguishes you from everyone else? b) If you could change one thing about your personality, what would it be? Why?
*

I don't really know what would distinguish me from others. I would say my creativity, but I have many very creative friends, although my creativity does tend to manifest itself in different ways than theirs. I suppose like my mother, I am very thoughtful when it comes to the people I care about. All my life I have felt that I have put more effort into my friendships and relationships than what I receive back. My mother and sister are the same way. We find ourselves overly conscious of what's going on with our friends (i.e. events and birthdays, how they are feeling at the moment, what they like and dislike) and we find ourselves a little disappointed when we are not treated the same. This shows that we are certainly not selfless, as that would mean we did not expect anything in return. We do care about ourselves and we just really want to see the love we give returned. That's not to say we do these things simply because we expect the same, we do it out of the goodness of our hearts and we truly want to make these people happy. It's just a little disheartening when it feels like our love goes unnoticed.

The one thing I would change about my personality would be my self-centered nature. I hate that term though, because when I use it it always sounds like I mean conceited or egotistical, which I am not. I am terrified of having an ego. However, I am always in my own head. Head in the clouds, absentminded, unobservant, inattentive, careless, even air headed- all terms that have been used to describe me at some point or another. My mother calls my father the "absentminded professor type", so that's likely where I get it from. However, he's not self-centered. I just can't get out of my head. It leads to brooding, self-loathing, and I end up talking about myself too much and while no one comes out and says it (other than my family), I know I annoy people. I certainly annoy myself. There's always too much going on in my head and too much I want to say and it would be nice to shut that off. It's highly likely that's what caused my sleeping issues, as well. I can't just turn off my brain at night like others can. It just keeps running. 


*8. How do you treat hunches or gut feelings? In what situations are they most often triggered?
*

I have a tendency to trust my hunches. I often feel I'm fairly intuitive. These come into play mostly when meeting new people. I make snap judgments about other people when I first meet them and while I try to tell myself "Don't listen to that, people don't always make the greatest first impressions/can be more charming and kind when you first meet them", eventually most of what my gut tells me ends up being true. That's not to say I haven't been completely blindsided by people I thought I knew and trusted. It happens more often than I'd like, and I've become much less trusting and paranoid because of it. Very rarely will someone that gives me a negative first impression actually become someone I actually enjoy being around. 


*9. a) What activities energize you most? b) What activities drain you most? Why?
*

Creative and intellectual activities tend to energize me the most for sure. Whether it's working on my business, the video game I'm working on, or just watching an enjoyable show or playing a video game I'm invested in, anything that gets my mind working motivates me. It also helps if I have people close to me to share in my enjoyment. I don't necessarily need to be doing those activities with other people (unless it's working on the game- then having people to bounce ideas off of is what I prefer) but I enjoy having discussions about creative endeavors and media with my friends.

As for activities that drain me... anything physical. I need to start working out more because I know I'm in terrible shape (I eat healthy and I am not overweight, but I am getting weak). I was a dancer until I was 16 years old, and I enjoyed that a lot, but I hated team sports. I refused to join any sports after I had bad experiences in middle school volleyball. People were mean... if you weren't as athletic as they were, they'd treat you horribly. I hated being relied on to win games. If we lost, I felt like a failure and that I let my team down. If we won, I assumed it was just because everyone else was that good. Also many of my very wide range of jobs drained me horribly. My favorite jobs were working as a barista during my first two years of college, at a bubble tea shop my third year, and a bakery during the summer between my second and third years. 

Funny enough, while those were my most enjoyable jobs, the management at the bubble tea place and the bakery were the worst. I absolutely loved the creativity of making drinks as a barista and at the bubble tea shop- it was so much fun for me when people were unfamiliar with boba and I got to help them figure out what flavors and drinks they would enjoy the most, and then see them overjoyed with what I created for them. At the bakery, when I started out there were only 5 employees, one of which was a chef/the baker. Only a few weeks into my summer with them, they fired 3 of the employees, including the baker. The other girl that remained with me ended up being recruited to work for the couple that owned the bakery at their antique store next door doing upholstery. So that meant I was left alone to run the entire restaurant- I opened and closed, I made all the food, served all the customers, and cleaned everything. I hated that they put so much pressure on me, and they were very rude people, but I really loved baking. I loved being alone in the back just having fun creating new recipes and experimenting with fun additions to the muffins we sold (the owners were insanely impressed with my muffins and they sold very well). I suppose I'm getting off track now, but it's kind of fun realizing that the most fun I had at my jobs is basically what I am doing now with the business I own.

So, back to what drains me- it seems like activities that require me to be relied on for the proper completion of tasks are the culprit here. Having pressure placed on me by others. I also hate anything that involves large crowds, mostly ones that are moving. The Farmer's Market in the city I went to college in is absolutely amazing, but it is just PACKED. I get serious anxiety in crowds. Over-socialization and over-stimulation leaves me pretty dead too. I like to take things at my own pace. If I'm forced to do too much in too little time, the anxiety acts up. When it boils down to it, I like my space and I don't like being told what to do.


*10. What do you repress about your outward behavior or internal thought process when around others? Why?*

I attempt to be less talkative around others. I'm fairly good at reading people and being able to tell when they're still enjoying themselves while listening to me or when they're annoyed or have just checked out, but some people are very good at faking it. So unless I've got some booze in me, I do my best to restrain myself. Fortunately when I talk, it's only when I feel I actually have something to say and not just because I like hearing myself speak. And I do often have a LOT to say (as I mentioned before, my brain is always cranking). As for internal thought processes... I do what I can to repress my negative thoughts about myself when I'm with others because I want to be engaged with them. And if I'm thinking too much about myself and in a negative way, if I do end up blabbing as usual, it may end up being things that NO ONE wants to hear. If I do end up feeling down about myself around others, I will shut down or remove myself from the situation. 


Alright... that covers those questions. I hope that's enough information for you all. If there are any other questionnaires or just singular questions you'd like me to answer that will give you more insight, please feel free to guide me to them.


Thank you all in advance! You're all lovely and knowledgeable people and I look forward to reading what you have to say about me.


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## Maker of helmets (Sep 8, 2014)

Hi

i am thinking you would have preference for intuition and Feeling, not sure about introversion/extroversion


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

Maker of helmets said:


> Hi
> 
> i am thinking you would have preference for intuition and Feeling, not sure about introversion/extroversion


This is where I seem to have the most trouble. I get either or depending on the day or the test.


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## Bitterself (Mar 14, 2015)

Either INFP or INFJ


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

Eluid Sade said:


> Either INFP or INFJ


Since I've gotten a couple answers, I'll say what I usually get. I used to get ENFP up until a few years ago when things got really rough on me and I didn't need or want to be around people as much, so I definitely turned a bit introverted. Now I get INFP and ENFP fairly equally. I still get lonely and need socialization like I did when I was more extroverted, but it's a lot harder for me to keep up with it now. I don't enjoy consistent interaction... I need my space.


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## HellenAllen (Nov 27, 2015)

Infj !


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

HellenAllen said:


> Infj !


Interesting!
That's one I've never gotten in a test before. It's almost always P. Sometimes I get T instead of F but never J.


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## sometimes (Dec 26, 2013)

I'd guess possibly INFJ...


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## KalimofDaybreak (Aug 6, 2015)

Full disclosure: I wasn't originally going to respond to this post, but as I was clicking away I had a sudden epiphany that you were an INFP. I decided to go and look at your answers more carefully, and I did get an INFP vibe from your answers, especially those bits about being true to yourself. I don't think INFJ, but that's mostly because, at least for me, the concept of being true to myself never even occurred to me until I started studying Jung. So the fact that you consider personal authenticity to be one of your core values seems INFPish me.

I get the impression that you've scored T in the past because of your intelligence, but I get the impression that intellect is more of a heated acquaintance instead of passionate lover for you (pardon the metaphor). Not that you aren't smart or don't enjoy intelligent conversation, but that in the end thinking and intellect aren't your ultimate goal. It seems that you enjoy feeling and being smart, but it doesn't go beyond that for you. Again, I don't want to sound like I'm saying you're intellectually shallow; I don't think you are.

Overall, though, I can't point to any specifics that make me think INFP, it's just a general vibe. I have some questions I'd be willing to ask you to maybe go a little deeper, but I'll leave it up to you as to whether we proceed that way or not.


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

Going to do this questionnaire too, in case it helps.

*1) What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?
*

I've become more introverted over the past few years. I don't like to go out and party anymore (though I won't turn down a good time if I'm in the right mood for it) and I prefer to just sit at home with my family reading things online, watching TV, or playing games. Though apparently if I am an ENFP, it makes sense that they're the most "introverted" of the Es, because even though I spend most of my free time either alone or just quietly around my family, I enjoy external stimuli like games and shows. I also still really enjoy talking. A lot. I've just learned to tone it down. 


*2) What do you yearn for in life? Why?
*

Love, companionship, peacefulness, happiness, creative fulfillment.
I have very strong feelings about the people I care about and I want to feel them in return. I like having close friends that I can tell anything to. When I was younger, as most teens do, I desired a relationship. As I got older, I didn't really want one anymore. I figured I'd die alone and I didn't really care. Recently I realized that's not at all true... I probably just felt like a happy relationship was unattainable. I still feel that way, because I've been spoiled having my parents as role models for a healthy relationship. But now I want to find it even more. Especially since I'm reaching that age where many of my friends are getting married and having children. I feel lonely.
I have a lot of anxiety and I worry about the people I love, so I would like to just be able to have a calm mind instead of crippling fear that I will lose someone I care about (I'm most worried about my father right now). I also have been dealing with debilitating mental illnesses for over 10 years and now things are finally starting to look up for me. And I want to maintain that happiness/learn to obtain more. Part of what will give me happiness is using my creativity to make a difference in people's lives, even if just for entertainment.


*3) Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.
*

That's... really difficult for me. My possible answers are conflicting, and I don't have a very high opinion of myself, so I don't tend to think of moments in that way. I guess if I'm thinking of times when I've felt good about myself, it would have to be when people let me know I've made a difference in their life somehow, even if it's small. After starting my business, I've gotten a few very touching stories from customers that really made me feel like what I'm doing does matter, even if it doesn't always feel like it to me. When I was younger and more outgoing/extroverted, I felt pretty good about myself if I got positive recognition for something I did.


*4) What makes you feel inferior?
*

Myself usually. Setting too high of standards for myself. Sometimes I _think_ it's other people that make me feel inferior, but really it's just me comparing myself to those people. Feeling like I've disappointed people.


*5) What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)
*

Obviously it depends on the situation and what kind of decision I'm trying to make, because a financial/business decision is going to require a different thought process than a moral/social decision. Usually my feelings and the feelings of others come first, typically at the same time, and then I weigh the pros and cons if necessary. For example, if I'm creating a new product for my business, my first thoughts are "Will I enjoy making this and will others enjoy purchasing it?" After that, I figure out if it's going to make financial sense or not to introduce more products and how popular they will be compared to our current products. If I'm making some sort of decision regarding friends or family, I tend to think "Is this going to be positive/healthier for me in the long run, and how will the other party feel about this decision?" I try to focus on making decisions that will keep me the happiest while minimizing any negative effects on other people (unless I don't feel they deserve it for some reason). A situation where this might come into play is ending a relationship/friendship. If I feel like I am expending more energy and time into the relationship than I am receiving, I may consider ending it. I of course care a lot about the feelings of others, especially if I do still feel somewhat positively towards the individual in question, so I will decide if my happiness is worth the pain I will bring to the other person. If I feel that their pain will be short lived and I will eventually be in a better position mentally, I will go through with it in the best way I can. Otherwise I then have to weigh the pros and cons of cutting off ties. 


*6) When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?
*
I do like having control of the outcome if it's something that I am going to be attributed to. If I am just helping on a project, I don't really care too much. I will take guidance and perhaps provide input if the situation calls for it, but otherwise I don't want or need control of the outcome. The outcome that is desired by the party that began the project is what I hope to achieve. If it's my own project, yes, I absolutely like to have control. Depending on what my abilities are and what I am hoping to achieve, I may relinquish some control. When it comes to new products for my business, I ultimately control the final outcome, but there are parts that I do not have control over. I guide the person that creates these parts and work to make sure they meet my criteria as best as possible, but in the end if they tell me they can not meet my expectations I have to trust that they know best. 

As for my emphasis... I'm not entirely sure what this means, haha. I guess I focus on creating something that is as close to my original ideas as possible... to create something that I will be proud of and that represents me and my individual ideas and sensibilities. 


*7) Describe us a time where you had a lot of fun. How is your memory of it? 
*
Uhh... good question. I will go to my most recent memory of my family's trip to Japan. I had an absolute blast. I was able to use what little Japanese I remembered from taking it in college (oh how I wish I had continued...) and it was my first trip out of the country so while it was very overwhelming being in an entirely different culture, it was exhilarating and I loved just being surrounded by things that I could never experience here. It was also great to be able to share that experience with my entire family.


*8) When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you? (Are you more prone to be hands on, to theorize, to memorize, etc)
*
I'm very hands-on. I cannot just read an instruction manual and suddenly know how to use something. I need to be using it as I'm taught, so that I can ascribe the motions and feelings to the purpose. Same goes with learning things in a scholarly setting. I loved learning languages, but if the languages are not being practiced in real-world settings, those skills and the vocabulary can easily be lost. I can pick up on languages extremely quickly, which is part of the reason I loved learning them, but I need to be able to use them around others. I can't just pick up a language book or get Rosetta Stone and expect to learn as quickly as I would in a classroom setting.


*9) How organized do you to think of yourself as?
*
Not organized at all. That's not to say I don't have my own methods. If my bedroom, for example, is a total and complete disaster, and someone comes in and cleans it, I will probably have a panic attack trying to find something. No matter how well they organized it, if things are not where I remember them being (even if I have to dig under piles of things to get to them) I will freak out. However when I do actually motivate myself to clean, I can be fairly organized. My memory is also terrible and I am very bad at keeping a planner/writing things on a calendar, though I try.


*10) How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it?
*
Usually both, but more so the former. If something doesn't jive with how I see the world, or even if it's just some silly rumor, I will try to do my research to make sure I'm getting all the correct information. Especially so with polarizing and emotional tragedies and news stories. If I get biased information from one source, I'm going to try to get an equal amount of information on the same story from the other side. Or I will try to ignore any biased information and search for the most neutral explanation. I try not to make judgments about things until I've learned what the cause was and if it makes sense. I am an emotional person, so I will tend to make some sort of judgment when I hear about something initially, but I will put those feelings aside until I have gathered as much unbiased information as possible. If I only looked for information to support the things I hear about, I would be pushed further and further into an uninformed and likely incorrect opinion. This is how extremists in any sort of situation handle things and I like to consider myself a very moderate person when it comes to these things.


*11) You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?
*
Again, a little of both. I cannot be happy with myself if I do not stay true to myself, but I enjoy feeling like I have someplace to belong where everyone is also enjoying themselves. I will never compromise my own beliefs for other people, but I know when to put my opinions aside for the sake of keeping the peace with people I care about.


*12) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?
*
I definitely speak before I think. Fortunately I don't have a terrible case of foot-in-mouth disease or anything, but I have a tendency to ramble (if the answers to these questions were any indication). I have a lot of friends that enjoy listening, which is good for me when I get on a subject I'm passionate about. I can shut up and listen to others, though. I enjoy being on the receiving end of my friends discussing their passions as well. As for one-on-one or group conversations, that all depends on my mood and what the situation is. Most of the time I prefer one-on-one discussion, as it's easier to have an equal amount of exchange between two people. In groups sometimes one person dominates the conversation, and others feel like they're being shut out and not heard. It's very frustrating for me to be that person or to see someone else struggling to get a word in edgewise. With my loquaciousness I can sometimes end up the "conversation dominator", but if I catch myself doing so, I try and step back a little and let others jump in. I find group conversations to be very fun, engaging, and thought-provoking, but nothing beats quality one-on-one time with someone you care about.


*13) Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Do actions speak more than words?
*
I don't really know. Depending on the situation I like to have a little bit of planning and research before I jump in, but most of the time it doesn't require much. I like to learn as I go, I guess. 

Actions definitely speak louder than words. My most recent ex told me the most inane things that he felt were true, like "relationships don't take work" and "words speak louder than actions". I could not wrap my brain around why he felt either of those to be true. In the end, I was right, because despite what he told me he felt about me, his actions told me otherwise. 


*14) It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do?
*
I feel like I'm answering so many of these with "well, depending on the situation..." but again, that's kind of how this would be. Do I have the ability to record the show or watch it later? Am I in the mood to go out that night? How late is it? How long is the show? What friends are calling me? All of these things play a big part into deciding whether or not I want to go out. If it's a short show and I'm in the mood to see those friends, I could say, "Yeah sure, let me watch this real quick and then I'll meet you out." And I'd try to get ready while watching the show. Otherwise, I'd probably just say I wasn't up to it and hope we could do something another time.


*15) How do you act when you're stressed out?
*
I get extremely tense and irritable. I also get very flustered. It's hard for me to gather my thoughts and focus on anything, and if people try and interact with me while I'm like this I may lash out at them or break down because of too much stimulation. My father always tells me "Sometimes the best thing to do is absolutely nothing." I try to remember that when I'm stressed out, and think "I will only end up hurting myself or making a mistake if I keep going like this. I need to stop." 


*16) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?
*
I consider myself to be an annoying person so I feel a little hypocritical saying that I can't stand annoying people, but it's true. What I consider annoying though may not be the same way I am annoying. I don't like people that stick their noses where they don't belong, and always try to be involved with everything that's going on. I don't like haughtiness and self-importance, and I don't like abrasive people. I don't like people that constantly complain or talk about negative things and I can't stand flakiness. 


*17) Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?
*
I enjoy having debates about things as long as the other person is respectful of my beliefs and the purpose of the argument is to become more informed. I like helping friends with their personal troubles and relationships, but to an extent. I can't be the one always relied on for advice- they need to figure some things out on their own- but if my friends see me as a good resource for things, I enjoy helping when I can. Other than that just general interests and passions. My friends and I are all very geeky people, so we like discussing our favorite shows and games and what we're going to cosplay next (yep, I'm one of those geeks).


*18) What kind of things do pay the least attention to in your life?
*
My own health and physical well-being, lately. I need to focus on it more. I try to eat well, and I try to take care of myself mentally, but I am not active and I really should be. Other than that I'm not really sure... I'm not the most motivated person in the world so getting me to be as focused on work as I should be can be a struggle, but I still care about my business, even if I'm not always actively working on something.


*19) How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? ? What would your friends never say about your personality ?
*
I tried to recruit my friends' help for this because I never know how my friends perceive me, haha. I am an empathetic person but I never try to assume I know what someone thinks or how they feel about something.
I'm not getting many answers, though. I guess from what I can tell, they tend to see me as friendly, helpful, a bit melodramatic, and some see me as mature and put-together. Those would probably be the most incorrect things... I mean, maturity is probably relative, and I suppose compared to a lot of my friends and people my friends know, I do come off as more mature. I certainly don't have everything together though. I feel like a mess. I'm glad I come off as well-adjusted to some of my younger friends that I realize may look up to me a bit, but I don't want to give them any sort of false ideas. I wouldn't want someone young looking at me thinking I have everything together and they feel like they don't, and that that's wrong or something... because as much as I tell myself the opposite, it's alright to be an adult and not feel like everything's in place for you. 

As for what they'd never say about me... I don't think they'd say I'm stupid, boring, aggressive, passive, quiet, simple, or calm. 


*20) You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?*

I might work on cosplay if I'm feeling up to it, maybe try to motivate myself to work on my game a bit more. I may watch some anime, do some cooking, spend time with my family... I guess just anything I normally would do during my downtime.


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

KalimofDaybreak said:


> Full disclosure: I wasn't originally going to respond to this post, but as I was clicking away I had a sudden epiphany that you were an INFP. I decided to go and look at your answers more carefully, and I did get an INFP vibe from your answers, especially those bits about being true to yourself. I don't think INFJ, but that's mostly because, at least for me, the concept of being true to myself never even occurred to me until I started studying Jung. So the fact that you consider personal authenticity to be one of your core values seems INFPish me.
> 
> I get the impression that you've scored T in the past because of your intelligence, but I get the impression that intellect is more of a heated acquaintance instead of passionate lover for you (pardon the metaphor). Not that you aren't smart or don't enjoy intelligent conversation, but that in the end thinking and intellect aren't your ultimate goal. It seems that you enjoy feeling and being smart, but it doesn't go beyond that for you. Again, I don't want to sound like I'm saying you're intellectually shallow; I don't think you are.
> 
> Overall, though, I can't point to any specifics that make me think INFP, it's just a general vibe. I have some questions I'd be willing to ask you to maybe go a little deeper, but I'll leave it up to you as to whether we proceed that way or not.



That sounds quite accurate, actually. Thank you so much for following through with that epiphany of yours! I would love to answer whatever questions you have for me.


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## mistakenforstranger (Nov 11, 2012)

Based on your first questionnaire, INFJ. 

On your second one, xNFJ, but you still seem to have inf. Se, with neglecting health and practical concerns, so I would still say INFJ. Those things just aren't Ni-doms' priority, unfortunately. 

You have very strong Fe. Giving to others, reciprocating, censoring one's views, striving for harmony in the group, thinking about how other people will react, etc. are all signs of Fe. I can go into more detail if you like, too, because I see Ni and Ti as well.


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## Shonz (Nov 30, 2015)

INFJ. You seem to enjoy harmony and Insight while at the same time show signs of Ti. Your preference for extroversion might be explained by a rise of the inferior function Se. Maybe you should try taking an Enneagram or Cognitive functions Test


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

mistakenforstranger said:


> Based on your first questionnaire, INFJ.
> 
> On your second one, xNFJ, but you still seem to have inf. Se, with neglecting health and practical concerns, so I would still say INFJ. Those things just aren't Ni-doms' priority, unfortunately.
> 
> You have very strong Fe. Giving to others, reciprocating, censoring one's views, striving for harmony in the group, thinking about how other people will react, etc. are all signs of Fe. I can go into more detail if you like, too, because I see Ni and Ti as well.





Shonz said:


> INFJ. You seem to enjoy harmony and Insight while at the same time show signs of Ti. Your preference for extroversion might be explained by a rise of the inferior function Se. Maybe you should try taking an Enneagram or Cognitive functions Test


This is all so strange to me! I've never gotten INFJ before. It's always been xNxP. 

I took some Enneagram tests and I seem to be a 4w3. Definitely very accurate.


I feel like some of my answers to these questions are a bit misleading.
Especially when it comes to the whole "giving to others" type thing.
I enjoy giving to people I care about, but that's about as far as it goes. The people that I'm close to are the most important- I tend to not care much about others. I don't care about their lives, what they think of me, or what happens to them (as horrible as that sounds) unless I have some sort of connection to them. 

When it comes to striving for harmony in a group... it's more for my own comfort. I wouldn't want to be around people that made me uncomfortable because there's something that's unsettling them. I care a lot about how my friends are feeling, yes, but sometimes there's nothing I can do to help that. So I don't particularly want to rock the boat around them because it would put me in a compromising situation. 

I am a very self-centered person. I am usually more concerned with my own thoughts and feelings first, though others' are nearly as important. I like being the center of attention when I choose to be, and I enjoy popularity. Deep down I know I prefer to have closer friends even if there are few of them, but fame is certainly desirable to me. Hence why I always wanted to be an actor- I mostly acted because I enjoyed it, but I liked the idea of fame. I still plan on doing things that could possibly give me a certain level of attention. 

Still getting the same results:


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## KalimofDaybreak (Aug 6, 2015)

rjaye said:


> That sounds quite accurate, actually. Thank you so much for following through with that epiphany of yours! I would love to answer whatever questions you have for me.


Haha, I'm glad I can help.

Okay, so I think to get an accurate answer the best thing we can do is distinguish between Fe and Fi. So here's my first question:

If you think someone is making a bad choice, would you make that judgment based on how their actions affected the group/went against a socially accepted standard, and would you then try to convince them that they should alter their actions so as to conform to said standard, or would you make that judgment based on how authentic to their own values they were being (I hesitate to say integrity here because that applies to both types of feeling, but that is kind of the idea), and would you try to help them figure out what they actually want so they can resolve the issue? In other words, would you 'sculpt' them into what you believe is socially acceptable or or would you try to help them grow into who they really are?

That's a good starting place, at least.


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

KalimofDaybreak said:


> Haha, I'm glad I can help.
> 
> Okay, so I think to get an accurate answer the best thing we can do is distinguish between Fe and Fi. So here's my first question:
> 
> ...


I would definitely make that judgment based on their values. To me a bad choice in most situations is something that will harm the person making it... though obviously there are always exceptions (someone hurting others because they get enjoyment out of it... but that's just an entirely different issue). 

I would never want someone to make a decision based on what's expected of them if it goes against what they truly want.


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## KalimofDaybreak (Aug 6, 2015)

rjaye said:


> I would definitely make that judgment based on their values. To me a bad choice in most situations is something that will harm the person making it... though obviously there are always exceptions (someone hurting others because they get enjoyment out of it... but that's just an entirely different issue).
> 
> I would never want someone to make a decision based on what's expected of them if it goes against what they truly want.


Yeah, that's Fi there. Here's another question.

Which situation would result in a better world: if we all agreed upon a universal moral standard that everyone adhered to (even if they were forced to give up some of their personal beliefs), or if everyone acknowledged that we have different values and expressed those? (Obviously, you wouldn't be able to to go around killing people if you believed you could, but in general there would not be much in the way of external moral standard.)


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## mistakenforstranger (Nov 11, 2012)

rjaye said:


> This is all so strange to me! I've never gotten INFJ before. It's always been xNxP.
> 
> I took some Enneagram tests and I seem to be a 4w3. Definitely very accurate.
> 
> ...


Ok, so while I don't think any of what you said above necessarily rules out INFJ, I can see ENFP, too. On paper, ENFPs and INFJs can seem very similar, they have a lot in common, but are nothing alike in real-life. This is due to the ordering of their functions, but their orientation is reversed. 

ENFP: Ne - Fi - Te - Si
INFJ: Ni - Fe - Ti - Se

I do think you're definitely an NF with N-dominant and S-inferior functions, so either ENFP or INFJ. Come to think of it, you do remind me of my friend who's also ENFP. She cares very deeply for a select few individuals, especially friends and family, and her mind can't stop thinking, like how you describe yourself in your first questionnaire. She's very sure of her "likes/dislikes," and won't waste time with anyone who she doesn't feel lives up to her personal standards. She feels things very very strongly. Still, that could all apply to INFJs under certain circumstances, as well. INFJs, though, tend to be more studious bookworms while my friend just wants to have fun. Work can wait for them, but they are very hard workers when they have to be. And that's my friend, not you, of course, but maybe you can relate. Not sure if any of that helps.


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

I went through and highlighted the phrases that apply to me the most for INFP, ENFP, and INFJ.

INFP has the most that I relate to, and the ones in INFJ that apply to me can also be found in the INFP description.





















Also, here's my more in-depth Enneagram results. https://i.gyazo.com/c173017f2776476cd4e563793f5670b3.png

And @mistakenforstranger, your friend sounds a bit more like me. I'm not very studious, and I am a hard worker, but only when I really want to be and have the motivation.


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## rjaye (Nov 28, 2015)

I'm stupid, I just realized that I already did that right after it happened. Wow. I'm not feeling well lately, my apologies.


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