# Men And Being Called "Cute"



## SenhorFrio (Apr 29, 2010)

i don't mind it infact i like it!


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## Stars (Jul 23, 2009)

amanda32 said:


> In girl land it can be seen as tacky or slutty to say, "he's hot/sexy" or something like that. Too aggressive, that's why we say "cute" at least IMO. Hot, sexy, etc are definitely said but not in casual conversation and they're said later to a guy once I'm sure that it's mutual.
> 
> "Cute" is a safe way of saying: I'm interested a little, or maybe a lot but I'm not going to be so upfront and aggressive about it. I'm going to tell you in a more _casual_ way.


I'd prefer if girls called me "handsome" or "good-looking" since "cute" to me implies a small child and I agree with Amanda on "hot/sexy" sounding too aggressive and coarse. I don't flat-out hate being called cute; it's just you'd have to be pretty talented with expressions to make me take it as a compliment.

I am so picky about the way people compliment me.


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## CallSignOWL (Jan 11, 2010)

I tend to use the term "cute"...but really only as a way to say that they appeal to me. Like if i describe meeting a guy, friends will ask "is he cute?" and im like... :mellow: well, I guess so? Which really means I wasn't thinking about that at the time!

The ESTP i have a crush on I consider "cute." not Cute as in 'fluffy-puppy-omgsoadorable'. but as Attractive. I was originally drawn to him because of his physical looks (think dark-haired and athletic :wink: ), but now I just really like him because, well, he is him.

and women tend to prefer the "cute" looking males in contrast to the "masculine" looking males. The Cute guys seem more like tho ones who would actually stick around and be involved in a relationship. The über-masculine types just seem like they only want sex.

OWL


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## ByzantineBird (Sep 4, 2010)

It depends on context. It can be compliment, if they genuinely like me and want to become my affectionate lover. It is offensive if they don't want this, or nothing more than a little fun, because that comment is contempt, the worst of emotions shown in relationships as discovered through science. It puts me on a lesser plain as that of a child, it is saying me, my attitudes, dress, and behavior is cute, as that of a child, which should not be the first instinct. I would prefer, insightful, or strong, both mental and physical.


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## Ikari T (Nov 1, 2008)

Because cute is the "last resort" word. Why not call them gorgeous, hot, handsome, genius, ingenius, or sexy? 
Cute = You're great and all, but you're just not going to live up to my standards
That's my point of view from one specific siutation. 

However, it really depends on how the word cute is used.


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## darlarosa (Jul 20, 2010)

....Should we make a system of charts describing what words are appropriate for each situation, gender, and relationship?


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## Hermes (Aug 9, 2010)

I vote yes, it would be bloody helpful and hilarious to see as well :laughing:


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## perennialurker (Oct 1, 2009)

In my experience, "you're so cute" essentially means I have no hope with that woman.


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## CrabHammer (Jun 18, 2010)

I wonder if there's a difference between what women say to other women and what women say to mean. I could see cute being used in many contexts when talking with other women about men, but almost every time a women has called me cute it has been in a non-romantic, non-sexual sense and it seems a number of us have had a similar experience.

(Maybe I should stop wearing my pink bunny PJs :crazy


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## Stallout (Aug 16, 2010)

I dont take compliments well in the first place but I have strange feeling about the word cute. Its not like a girl is trying to diminish me if she calls me cute but its an underlying meaning that bothers me. It feels like she ruffled my hair and said "awe". I know its a compliment but it makes me feel negligible. As if Im not to be taken as seriously as others, like she brushed me aside. Not to mention what you guys already have, how it feel like it takes away any masculinity we had. Ive been told I over anylize stuff like this but I cant help but wince inwardly when I hear cute used to describe me.


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## WickedQueen (Jun 1, 2009)

Cute guys in my dictionary:


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## SirDude (Aug 2, 2010)

NightSkyGirl said:


> I'm curious. Why is it that so many men(not all) have a problem with a girl describing them as cute? Do you have a problem with that and please say why or why not.



If the woman saying it fits the type that would say "he's cute", then it's ok. But, if I hear a woman referring to men with all kinds of kinky names, and then she called me "Cute", I'd take that like she was referring to me as her brother or friend.


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## wafflecake (Aug 30, 2010)

I don't have a problem with it; I have some "soft" features, and it's a compliment regardless. I'll take "cute" over "you've got a great personality..." anyday.


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## darlarosa (Jul 20, 2010)

So This is the list

*Good Compliments*
Hot
You are amazing
Gorgeous

*
Agressive Compliments*
Sexy
So very the hottness (>_>)
Damn...you burn my precious EYES

*Bad compliments*
"You have a great personality"
EH both compliments
Cute


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## brigon (Sep 9, 2010)

I hate being called cute. It's not something I ever wanna be referred to as.


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## skycloud86 (Jul 15, 2009)

darlarosa said:


> So This is the list
> 
> *Good Compliments*
> Hot
> ...


I think the "you've got a great personality" may only be seen as bad by those men who rely on their looks more than something more substantial.


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## CrabHammer (Jun 18, 2010)

skycloud86 said:


> I think the "you've got a great personality" may only be seen as bad by those men who rely on their looks more than something more substantial.


The problem with that, once again, is not so much the compliment itself as it is the implication that one's physical features aren't worth mentioning. You're totally right that on it's own, "You have a great personality" should be a wonderful compliment to give someone, but unfortunately the phrase is now synonymous with "You aren't attractive enough for me to want to have sex with you." I feel like the kind of people who value personality over, or even to the exclusion of, physical appearance would find a more creative way to compliment you than just saying "You have a great personality." The secondary meaning has been establish and has now ruined the phrase for many people.


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## wiarumas (Aug 27, 2010)

skycloud86 said:


> I think the "you've got a great personality" may only be seen as bad by those men who rely on their looks more than something more substantial.


Call me crazy, but I rather have a girl like me for both my personality AND my looks. If a girl deflects a statement about looks to say that you have a great personality (its a very cliche quote that girls use with the same meaning), it means she has nothing nice to say about the way you look.

By the way, I mentioned this topic to my wife last night and she said that cute is usually not a good thing by her definition.


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## Hammerhand (Jul 24, 2010)

I do now know honestly.. But when a girl mentions i'm "Cute", i feel degraded in some way. It might be that it's because i view myself in another way, and feel misunderstood. Or that i lies in the term itself (Or my countless memories of rejection/etc), who knows?


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## Lullaby (Jul 21, 2010)

darlarosa said:


> So This is the list
> 
> *Good Compliments*
> Hot
> ...


My take:

*Good compliments:*
+ handsome
+ attractive
+ charming
+ easy on the eyes
+ good-looking

*Aggressive compliments:*
+ hot
+ sexy
+ irresistible
+ a studmuffin

*Bad compliments:*
+ cute (apparently)
+ nice
+ sweet
+ has a great personality

I love the word studmuffin. Studmuffin, studmuffin, studmuffin!

I'm so printing this out and carrying it everywhere with me. And you say girls were complicated...

Which reminds me - we should make a female version of the list. 

Studmuffin.


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## RobinsonCrusoe (Nov 25, 2009)

yea, men don't like being called cute, cuz THIS is cute:









and girls don't fuck "cute"


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## Snowguard (May 21, 2010)

RobinsonCrusoe said:


> yea, men don't like being called cute, cuz THIS is cute:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Indeed. By calling me cute you're taking a razor blade to my balls. If you're interested in me, you can use all sorts of good or aggressive compliments with me (if you're thinking in terms of the latter). I'm Australian and have a similar issue with the word 'mate'. i don't much care for it being used to refer to me, but when it comes from a woman it has an added sting. 

I'm not wanting to play power games, or automatically sleep with you. Just acknowledge I'm a man. If you like me, come and tell me. I'll be sure to run away, hide and ruminate on that for a few weeks.


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## Roze (Sep 12, 2010)

It's not that I don't like being called cute, more like, "Why are you calling me or what I do that's cute. o___o"


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## Hermes (Aug 9, 2010)

RobinsonCrusoe said:


> and girls don't fuck "cute"


Hey some people are into that type of stuff 


Just putting it out there..


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## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

I agree with the guy with the picture of the dog. Yeah you think he's "cute" which easily translates to awesome to have around just not enough that makes you "want" him and actually go after him. Sorry I think women are shallow (no offense just my bad experiences) and they don't want a "cute" guy, they want an asshole guy. 

They would rather just know a guy is going to break their heart and they will never be able to change a man (which is code for well he won't change so I have to try) than try to actually work and dig into a "cute" man with actual depth and are scared to take a chance with the unknown that if they get to the bottom it ends up no treasure, but it's just easier to take the easy road and date the asshole cus he's hot and shows the world he's a dick.


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## Thrifty Walrus (Jul 8, 2010)

Woman: You're so cute! Translation: You're SO in the friend zone, HAHAHA!


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

Wait! I just found a guy I want to call "cute" and I would like to fuck him too. So men- what should I say? I also find him incredibly "adorable" as well. Is this also "cutting off his balls"? I seriously see us getting very naughty in bed. His "cuteness" makes me really want him. 

I also find him sexy and handsome as well. But that is just a tip of it. There is something very endearing about him. That is sexy too. :blushed:


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## akkadian (Aug 11, 2010)

Pfft, I'm comfortable enough with myself to be called "cute" by a girl and not think anything of it.


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## Thrifty Walrus (Jul 8, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> Wait! I just found a guy I want to call "cute" and I would like to fuck him too. So men- what should I say? I also find him incredibly "adorable" as well. Is this also "cutting off his balls"? I seriously see us getting very naughty in bed. His "cuteness" makes me really want him.
> 
> I also find him sexy and handsome as well. But that is just a tip of it. There is something very endearing about him. That is sexy too. :blushed:


Being called handsome is always nice. And I'm sure if you called him cute while touching his leg or something he'd get the picture


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## Lullaby (Jul 21, 2010)

I'm with pink on this one. Cute ≠ unfuckable. There are tons of cute guys I'd like to shag senseless. :tongue:


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## Hardstyler (Sep 4, 2010)

I don't like being called cute trust me im far from cute but i am fucking sexy =D


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## pinkrasputin (Apr 13, 2009)

Hardstyler said:


> I don't like being called cute trust me im far from cute but i am fucking sexy =D


You're cute. :happy:


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## Hardstyler (Sep 4, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> You're cute. :happy:


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Instant No Button! Star Wars funnies FTW!


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## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

How's this, cute while in a relationship (for me of course, not everyone is the same) is ok and good. Outside, I can't read minds and don't know the context of it. Again, we don't know, now if you say "hey you are cute want to go on a date" or use more than just the word "cute", it would probably get the point across that cute means (it could be the start of something). Just my opinion. Like I said before, I was called cute and then the woman goes and dates the asshole instead.


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## Blue Butterfly (Sep 19, 2009)

But some of them are so darm adorable. They are cute not in a baby kind of way but in a handsome way.


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## Psychosmurf (Aug 22, 2010)

I sense that a lot of people on here are very insecure about their masculinity. :tongue:

So what if someone calls you cute? :bored:

Remember. There's a difference between _appearing_ masculine and _being_ masculine.


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## Fred (Mar 18, 2010)

Personally, I don't mind being called "cute". That just means that someone's actually noticing me. :sad:


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## dp79 (Jun 2, 2010)

You can call me cute any time!!! You can even scream it if you want!!!:crazy:


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## Snowguard (May 21, 2010)

pinkrasputin said:


> Wait! I just found a guy I want to call "cute" and I would like to fuck him too. So men- what should I say? I also find him incredibly "adorable" as well. Is this also "cutting off his balls"? I seriously see us getting very naughty in bed. His "cuteness" makes me really want him.
> 
> I also find him sexy and handsome as well. But that is just a tip of it. There is something very endearing about him. That is sexy too. :blushed:


A little old, you've doubtless done your own thing already, but I steered clear of this thread for a while on personal grounds. If you're feeling particularly gutsy, tell him you want to fuck him. If he's interested in any way, you cut straight to the chase. Getting called "cute", "adorable", "fluffy-bunnikins" or anything like that would send my mind in the opposite direction to the one you'd like. Maybe it's just me who is castrated by terms like these. 

If you like him as a man, approach him as a man. Make him know he's a man and you're a woman.

If you like him as a furry animal, there's only a small number of people who get off on that.


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## PaintingThoreau (Oct 5, 2010)

NightSkyGirl said:


> I'm curious. Why is it that so many men(not all) have a problem with a girl describing them as cute? Do you have a problem with that and please say why or why not.


I am not a dude but I am thinking it might be a bit like a girl being called 'tough' or something? God I sound sexist....but I mean that if you call someone something that challenges some of the common 'positive' gender traits you can make someone feel a bit defective.

Most men would like to be seen as strong and sexy and awesome.
Cute is how you usually describe little children or fuzzy animals...


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## JoetheBull (Apr 29, 2010)

Psychosmurf said:


> I sense that a lot of people on here are very insecure about their masculinity. :tongue:
> 
> So what if someone calls you cute? :bored:
> 
> Remember. There's a difference between _appearing_ masculine and _being_ masculine.


I am a little insecure of my masculinity since I am not even sure if I am considered being masculine by most people standards. :laughing::laughing:


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## Snowguard (May 21, 2010)

Psychosmurf said:


> I sense that a lot of people on here are very insecure about their masculinity. :tongue:
> 
> So what if someone calls you cute? :bored:
> 
> Remember. There's a difference between _appearing_ masculine and _being_ masculine.


Yeah, and what if I'm neither?

Damn fucking straight I'm insecure about my masculinity. Not that it's any business of yours. I hope you're off base-jumping burning skyscrapers by day and multiple-pleasured a multiude of models by night.


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## MissyMaroon (Feb 24, 2010)

Oh STFU you babies. When I call someone "cute" they better take it as a compliment.

It means a whole variety of things. I mostly mean "endearing", but wouldn't it be weird to be telling someone constantly "You're so endearing"? Sounds a little too formal in my book. Cute does the job. Your masculinity stays intact. Stop crying about it.


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## JoetheBull (Apr 29, 2010)

Snowguard said:


> Yeah, and what if I'm neither?
> 
> Damn fucking straight I'm insecure about my masculinity. Not that it's any business of yours. I hope you're off base-jumping burning skyscrapers by day and multiple-pleasured a multiude of models by night.


???



MissyMaroon said:


> Oh STFU you babies. When I call someone "cute" they better take it as a compliment.
> 
> It means a whole variety of things. I mostly mean "endearing", but wouldn't it be weird to be telling someone constantly "You're so endearing"? Sounds a little too formal in my book. Cute does the job. Your masculinity stays intact. Stop crying about it.


:laughing:I don't really mind being called cute. Kind of used to it by now. just poking fun at myself for not really understanding the masculinity concept.:laughing:. At least by most normal standards.


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## SyndiCat (Oct 2, 2010)

NightSkyGirl said:


> I'm curious. Why is it that so many men(not all) have a problem with a girl describing them as cute? Do you have a problem with that and please say why or why not.


Because "You're so cute," translates into "Let's stay friends," 
because you want to fuck my best friend, 
because he's packing a bit more muscle than me, or
because he's got that nice BMW while my care is broke down.


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## EskimoFox (Aug 14, 2010)

It kinda diminishes us... I mean, that's what our mothers used to call us way back then, and we really don't want you to think of us like our mother did


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## Snowguard (May 21, 2010)

MikeAngell said:


> Because "You're so cute," translates into "Let's stay friends,"
> because you want to fuck my best friend,
> because he's packing a bit more muscle than me, or
> because he's got that nice BMW while my care is broke down.





EskimoFox said:


> It kinda diminishes us... I mean, that's what our mothers used to call us way back then, and we really don't want you to think of us like our mother did


Gentlemen, thank you.

Thank you for looking at from different angles, and for saying so with far less vitriol than my last post.


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## LostInMyOwnMind (May 5, 2010)

No offense to anyone, but anyone who feels their masculinity is threatened by being called cute needs to grow a set and find some self confidence. Don’t be so damned thin skinned. I doubt anyone who said it would have meant it as anything negative.


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## Ziwosa (Sep 25, 2010)

Wait what, most people do not take this as a compliment?
You seriously have people who are worried about their "masculinity" ?


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## BryterLayter (Feb 15, 2010)

i don't mind it. i think its just another form of saying you adore someone as a person, while handsome, good looking, sexy etc. just cover looks. if anything cute is more of a compliment . for example you could call Mel Gibson handsome, good looking ,sexy etc. but you couldn't call him cute cause... well he's sort of an asshole .


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## Hokahey (Oct 8, 2010)

Not sure why so many automatically assume if a guy has a problem with the word "cute" it's a question of "masculinity". Stereotyping a problem with another stereotype just seems odd to me. I could be wrong.

Anyways, as I said earlier in this post and a continuation with quotes from some of the women here:

Overall and generally they say "Cute isn't bad, it could mean a variety of things".

Exactly, a "variety" I'm not a mind-reader, I'm good with perception but it's not 100% I don't enjoy a round-a-bout game where I have to guess what you meant (which you get to sit back and decide one way or the other, kinda like just being safe) Again, this is 2010 women want equal say and be equals (as they should be) they can share in the "risk" in my opinion. Get your feelings out there. Ask a guy out don't wait around for a guy to ask you, isn't that equal? Again, I don't like "cute" because it's subject to possible false interpretation (sad part is a women could mean it in an intimate setting but then retrack later if she feels like it and say "well I just meant cute") Stop hiding being words and talk with your heart.


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## SyndiCat (Oct 2, 2010)

LostInMyOwnMind said:


> No offense to anyone, but anyone who feels their masculinity is threatened by being called cute needs to grow a set and find some self confidence. Don’t be so damned thin skinned. I doubt anyone who said it would have meant it as anything negative.


A man doesn't tell another man to grow a pair. You have failed at acting cool on the internet.


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## snowprincess (Oct 11, 2010)

Personally, I prefer cute or adorable to hot or sexy.  I don't mean that in a pedo way; I swear.


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## SeekJess (Nov 1, 2009)

I havent met any men who mind being called cute. However once I called my boyfriend "pretty" without thinking, and he was like "HEY! Dont call me pretty" then of course I was a smart ass but you get the idea ^_^


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## KaylRyck (Feb 2, 2010)

I take "cute" or "pretty" as more of a compliment than an insult.

However, "hot" or "sexy" is probably a little more desirable. roud:


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## Blueguardian (Aug 22, 2009)

NightSkyGirl said:


> I'm curious. Why is it that so many men(not all) have a problem with a girl describing them as cute? Do you have a problem with that and please say why or why not.


Nope, no problem. I prefer "cute" or "adorable," over "hot" or "sexy." The first two make me happy, the second two make me feel awkward. I'm not _exactly_ sure why that is though.

As for why so many men have a problem with it... I guess it just contradicts with the image they were going for?


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## snowprincess (Oct 11, 2010)

Blueguardian said:


> Nope, no problem. I prefer "cute" or "adorable," over "hot" or "sexy." The first two make me happy, the second two make me feel awkward. I'm not _exactly_ sure why that is though.


INFPs are adorable by nature. :happy:

A lot of girls don't like it, either! I agree about the awkwardness with hot and sexy. One of my college professors patted me on the head and called me adorable, something most girls would find horrifying, but I was really flattered. *shrug*


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## dp79 (Jun 2, 2010)

snowprincess said:


> INFPs are adorable by nature. :happy:


.....:blushed:.....


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## EskimoFox (Aug 14, 2010)

MissyMaroon said:


> Oh STFU you babies. When I call someone "cute" they better take it as a compliment.


Or else missymaroon will show up at your house with a baseball bat and staple gun and MAKE SURE YOU DARN WELL TAKE IT AS A COMPLIMENT! :tongue:


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## Ming (Apr 7, 2010)

Because males are stupid.

/endthread


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## Rayne (Apr 28, 2010)

Ming said:


> Because males are stupid.
> 
> /endthread


As a male. I agree X-D


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## Somniorum (Oct 7, 2010)

........... :dry:

it strikes me as absolute insanity that so many men get offended and insecure when a lass calls them cute. cute is a wonderful word! stop trying to convince women to not use it :angry:

meh...


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## Daimai (Feb 14, 2010)

I see the adjective "cute" as something you would say to a puppy or something. Same thing with "Aww". Bothers me like hell.


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## Lullaby (Jul 21, 2010)

Daimai said:


> I see the adjective "cute" as something you would say to a puppy or something. Same thing with "Aww". Bothers me like hell.


Awwww, that's so cute! roud:

...

Sorry. Couldn't help it. :laughing:


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## Azure Bass (Sep 6, 2010)

NightSkyGirl said:


> I'm curious. Why is it that so many men(not all) have a problem with a girl describing them as cute? Do you have a problem with that and please say why or why not.


I really don't mind. As long as you're not mistaking my affection for other people for being completely gay or bisexual, I'm good. Why? Being called gay offends me because it's the biggest cock block because I feel you need an ego to divert it, which I'm considered spineless by some of my T friends. That's the why.


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## Napoleptic (Oct 29, 2010)

Wasn't it Ru Paul who said "I don't care what you call me so long as you call me?" :laughing:



Jazzanova said:


> I don't mind being called cute. I have no insecurities when it comes to my manliness.


To me, this is what masculine is. Which is manlier, the man who does a bunch of macho-man, hyper-masculine grandstanding, or the one who's so certain of his masculinity he is not at all uncomfortable doing non-"manly" things?

My vote is for the latter. Acting like a dick doesn't make yours any bigger.


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## Jwing24 (Aug 2, 2010)

When I hear someone call me cute, I think usually they are just trying to be nice and either don't mean it or they mean to say they are not interested in you but you are a nice person. 

I am learning to just stop caring about what is said about me, good or bad.

I have insecurities. I'm an introvert though, so I do what I always do. Go inward.


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## Devilsapple (Jun 17, 2010)

When I say a guy is cute I'm usually dismissing him and I am usually not saying it to him. It would normally go something like this "What do you think of him?" "Meh, he's cute I guess" If I think I guy is attractive I will say he is cool, charming, brilliant, rough etc.

Also if I find a guy UNattractive in that too clean brad pitt sort of way I will call him "pretty"


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## Jwing24 (Aug 2, 2010)

When a girl calls me cute, the thought process or discussion I imagine them having sounds like this. 

:tongue:



Devilsapple said:


> When I say a guy is cute I'm usually dismissing him and I am usually not saying it to him. It would normally go something like this "What do you think of him?" "Meh, he's cute I guess" If I think I guy is attractive I will say he is cool, charming, brilliant, rough etc.
> 
> Also if I find a guy UNattractive in that too clean brad pitt sort of way I will call him "pretty"


Hypothetically speaking, if a girl were to say " well you look charming, handsome,etc." something along these lines, I would instantly think "really? sweet! =)". Instead of "cute? oh okay, I see how it is. =/"

In all reality though, I don't care too much about these things, as they do not happen very often. =) Life goes on.


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## MissyMaroon (Feb 24, 2010)

Daimai said:


> I see the adjective "cute" as something you would say to a puppy or something. Same thing with "Aww". Bothers me like hell.


But, what if I do see a guy and think "Awww"? Is that such a bad thing? Plus, in a relationship it makes me want to stick around more. What is cute or adorable? It's endearing is what it is. When I see someone do something that is endearing, it's just plain ol' cute and my heart melts a little. I think being able to do that to a person is pretty damn impressive. A person who's cute can still be very sexy. They don't cancel each other out. 

So, yeah, I'm damn proud to say a guy who makes me go "Awww" is a winner to me!


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## MissyMaroon (Feb 24, 2010)

EskimoFox said:


> Or else missymaroon will show up at your house with a baseball bat and staple gun and MAKE SURE YOU DARN WELL TAKE IT AS A COMPLIMENT! :tongue:


Don't make me cut a bitch!


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## ENTrePenuer (Jun 12, 2010)

It's girl-speak for "I will never fuck you"

so yeah its offensive.


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## skycloud86 (Jul 15, 2009)

ENTrePenuer said:


> It's girl-speak for "I will never fuck you"
> 
> so yeah its offensive.


Firstly, you mean woman because girls tend to be those females under the age of sexual consent. Secondly, so what? Most women won't want to sleep with most men for some reason or another, and vice versa. Does it really matter if they don't? Don't pursue a sexual relationship with her and find another potential partner instead.


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