# Dealing with alcoholism



## Broc13 (Sep 13, 2016)

Alcohol is my addiction. I made it 4 months and finally felt like I was getting my life together until I drank last night. Im already in a lot of legal trouble and can't afford to drink. It seems like I am able to go 4-6 months sober but then impulsively binge. I've tried AA but talking about alcohol seems to make my cravings more intense. 

I have never been a religious man but For the first time I plan on going to church next Saturday. Im 26 and need a life change. I'd like to tell myself that I'm making progress but the reality is, One more DUI and I'll be looking at 10 years. 

Any advice?


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## birdsintrees (Aug 20, 2012)

Have you explored the reasons behind your addiction? Do you know what drives it or triggers it? Addiction is a disease. Get proper medical help if that is an option.


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## Broc13 (Sep 13, 2016)

birdsintrees said:


> Have you explored the reasons behind your addiction? Do you know what drives it or triggers it? Addiction is a disease. Get proper medical help if that is an option.


Epilepsy may have contributed to my drinking but my siezures are controled now. I think I need to rekindle old passions. I tend to self destruct when I have free time, my train of thought wonders into the dark corners of my mind. I just had 4 days off from work and that may have been the trigger... I've considered maybe taking up boxing. I love to compete and think I would be good at it.

I've also considered going to church for the social support that it may provide... Most of my friends are alcoholics themselves.


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## birdsintrees (Aug 20, 2012)

Broc13 said:


> Epilepsy may have contributed to my drinking but my siezures are controled now. I think I need to rekindle old passions. I tend to self destruct when I have free time, my train of thought wonders into the dark corners of my mind. I just had 4 days off from work and that may have been the trigger... I've considered maybe taking up boxing. I love to compete and think I would be good at it.
> 
> I've also considered going to church for the social support that it may provide... Most of my friends are alcoholics themselves.


Sounds like finding a new set of friends might be a really good idea. Maybe it's time to find out what's hiding in those dark corners of your mind. If there is stuff there that needs to be dealt with then ultimately it will keep coming back no matter how busy you keep.


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## ShadowsRunner (Apr 24, 2013)

I read a story about a man who to cope with quitting his addiction ran everyday on a treadmill (for however) many miles and would rely on the "runners" high primarily to help him cope with the negative feelings and so he would feel so good he would not need to resort to drinking to feel better. Though, that is just an exemplary story, because exercise and nutrition is one of the most common ways of coping obviously.


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## Belzy (Aug 12, 2013)

Broc13 said:


> Alcohol is my addiction. I made it 4 months and finally felt like I was getting my life together until I drank last night. Im already in a lot of legal trouble and can't afford to drink. It seems like I am able to go 4-6 months sober but then impulsively binge. I've tried AA but talking about alcohol seems to make my cravings more intense.
> 
> I have never been a religious man but For the first time I plan on going to church next Saturday. Im 26 and need a life change. I'd like to tell myself that I'm making progress but the reality is, One more DUI and I'll be looking at 10 years.
> 
> Any advice?


Make sure you don't get another DUI. Even it can become a bitch you can't drive at a certain moment, think about how much a bitch it would be if you _do_ get another DUI. 

And what I have learned from other alcoholics. You will be that for the remaining of your life, but the ones who don't look like one (who have stopped) have found a way to deal with that. Key is stay in touch with people, whether it's AA or church, or a buddy, just keep in touch with people, possibly you need to do that daily. Find the right people for that. Alcoholics who have stopped drinking are usually good people for that, they understand you and are willing to help. Good luck with that.

Be proud of every day you don't drink, and don't plan too much ahead (don't say I will never... that is too much to ask for yourself; you may eventually, but don't pressure yourself too much).


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## Impavida (Dec 29, 2011)

My brother is pretty much where you are....only 10 years further down the road and with a nasty coke habit on top of the alcoholism. He was charged with criminal DUI and has had his license revoked more than once. He had some success with AA for a while, but it didn't last long. He tried counselling, but couldn't find a therapist he felt comfortable with. A month ago, he checked himself into a private rehab facility. He'll probably be there at least another month.

It comes down to two things really:

1) You have to want to change. You can have all the help in the world, but if you really don't want to stop drinking, then you're not going to.

2) You need to get to the root of why you drink. Once you know why you drink, you can address any unresolved emotional issues you may have, learn what your triggers are and find healthier ways to cope.

Beyond that, I'll just say take it one day at a time. Look at every day as a completely independent unit. If you have a bad day, that doesn't mean it has to turn into a bad week. If you fall off the wagon, be kind to yourself. It's just a setback, not the end of the world. You're going to have lapses. Don't beat yourself up over it or start thinking that you're a failure. Reset, and start over with a clean slate the next day.


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## dizzycactus (Sep 9, 2012)

If you do drink, you should at least not drive. You're not addicted to driving, are you? Then it shouldn't be too hard to avoid.


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## la_revolucion (May 16, 2013)

Try and stay busy with hobbies that take you outside the home? Gym, hiking, running and etc... I notice that I give into temptations a lot when at home doing nothing. 

And... this is sort of joke but... When I started smoking weed, I pretty much quit drinking when before I would go out sometimes three times a week for drinks. Changed my life.


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## Peter (Feb 27, 2010)

Broc13 said:


> Alcohol is my addiction. I made it 4 months and finally felt like I was getting my life together until I drank last night. Im already in a lot of legal trouble and can't afford to drink. It seems like I am able to go 4-6 months sober but then impulsively binge. I've tried AA but talking about alcohol seems to make my cravings more intense.
> 
> I have never been a religious man but For the first time I plan on going to church next Saturday. Im 26 and need a life change. I'd like to tell myself that I'm making progress but the reality is, One more DUI and I'll be looking at 10 years.
> 
> Any advice?


Advice?

The most obvious advice of course is: Don't drink.

But that never works I guess.

What I don't understand is that the trouble you´re in isn't the drinking itself. It's the drinking AND then driving.

Why do you need to drive after you drink? I can't understand this. And why do you have to drink so much?


I see so many people in public transport that on their way back home, they are having a beer (or 2). They probably have another one at home. It seems to be a way to unwind after a busy day. Medically these people are alcoholists. It's a form of self-medication to be able to deal with the busy days. But these people don't drive when they've had a couple of drinks.

Just don't drive when you had a drink. Not even if it was just one. That doesn't solve your alcoholism problem, but that certainly solves your legal problems. Is it that hard to make sure you only drink when you don't have to drive afterwards?


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## PowerShell (Feb 3, 2013)

Broc13 said:


> One more DUI and I'll be looking at 10 years.


Not sure what state you are in, but in Texas, that would put you at 2nd and a 3rd offense would possibly be up to 10 years. If it were in Wisconsin (which is way more lenient than Texas), that would put you at 4 offenses facing your 5th. Judging by that, you have done some jail time in between. Isn't jail one of the worst experiences you have ever done? I was lucky that Wisconsin treats a first offense as a traffic ticket and not a crime with jail time. They still put me in 12 hours to sober up when I got pinched for my OWI right after I turned 21. I can tell you, jail completely sucks and that 12 hours proved I didn't want to go back (and haven't went back over 6.5 years later). If doing up to 10 years of this doesn't scare the hell out of you, I don't know what will. Just think about the horrific experience of jail.

Also, you should really get professional help and maybe even sell your vehicle if you can't resist the urge to drive drunk.


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## Mange (Jan 9, 2011)

There is no end or cure to addiction. Its forever. Its a part of who you are. The way people learn to live with it and avoid making mistakes varies from person to person. Maybe you need someone you can talk to when you are thinking about drinking. Someone who can help you change your mind about picking up that first drink. A sponsor.


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## Broc13 (Sep 13, 2016)

Peter said:


> Advice?
> 
> The most obvious advice of course is: Don't drink.
> 
> ...



Good point. When you drink a 750ml bottle or 2 of whiskey every 24 hours, there isn't really any sober time or time when your not blacked out for that matter... Obvious and Rational decisions don't always come easy in that cycle. I am really lucky to have not been in any accidents and realize that driving drunk is extremely dangerous for everyone on the road. I can't continue this behavior.

I'm a week sober and have really opened up to my friends about wanting sobriety. Started seeing a therapist multiple times a week and am going to church for the first time tomorrow. Gonna try to kick it this time.


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## birdsintrees (Aug 20, 2012)

Good on you for taking it seriously and doing something about it. Addiction is a disease and with the proper medical help, a support network and a bit of motivation you will be able to make things better. Never give up trying. You're worth it.


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## PowerShell (Feb 3, 2013)

Broc13 said:


> Good point. When you drink a 750ml bottle or 2 of whiskey every 24 hours, there isn't really any sober time or time when your not blacked out for that matter... Obvious and Rational decisions don't always come easy in that cycle. I am really lucky to have not been in any accidents and realize that driving drunk is extremely dangerous for everyone on the road. I can't continue this behavior.
> 
> I'm a week sober and have really opened up to my friends about wanting sobriety. Started seeing a therapist multiple times a week and am going to church for the first time tomorrow. Gonna try to kick it this time.


It sounds like you need a legit detox and some sort of rehab. Also, don't buy the alcohol in the first place. Now you're sober, if there's any laying around, pour it out and throw the bottles away. Put together habits that avoid the places where you buy alcohol and the people who encourage you to drink. You basically need to design your lifestyle and habits away from anything that will allow you to obtain alcohol.


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## janpers (Jul 10, 2016)

When I was a kid, I saw a picture of brain scans of alcoholics at various ages, and the brain deterioration/damage that got worse with age (and drinking). That stuck with me. Maybe you could print out a small picture of something similar, and put it at the bottom of your bathroom mirror. The one I saw was black and white. Can't find anything exactly like it, but here's one that's along the same lines.







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It seems that the 4 days off was the trigger, so I would suggest that the next time you get days off, plan well ahead and fill them with non-alcoholic activities with people who will be expecting you to show up. And/or get a hands-on hobby that holds your attention.

My dad was an alcoholic, but he's now in a senior living home, where he can't get any alcohol. It saddens and pains me to see him the way he is, because the brain damage has taken its toll. His personality is so different from when he was in middle-age. We have the same conversation loops every 15 seconds. I didn't know him well enough to know what his issues and problems were that started or kept him drinking, but no good came from it.


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## Peter (Feb 27, 2010)

Broc13 said:


> Good point. When you drink a 750ml bottle or 2 of whiskey every 24 hours, there isn't really any sober time or time when your not blacked out for that matter... Obvious and Rational decisions don't always come easy in that cycle. I am really lucky to have not been in any accidents and realize that driving drunk is extremely dangerous for everyone on the road. I can't continue this behavior.
> 
> I'm a week sober and have really opened up to my friends about wanting sobriety. Started seeing a therapist multiple times a week and am going to church for the first time tomorrow. Gonna try to kick it this time.


Good for you.

Good to see you aren't so selfish to not care about the welbeing of others. Sounds like you've got what it takes. You seem to be focused on making a change in lifestyle. That tends to be the best way. Be prepared for tough moments. They will happen and you've got to get through those as well. I'm sure that the experience of dealing with tough moments makes every next one easier to deal with.


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## Candy Apple (Sep 10, 2015)

How was church?


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## DomNapoleon (Jan 21, 2012)

Oh sorry to hear about your relapse. 

I healed my alcoholism with the following method: I used to write a lot ´´I am so happy and thankful now that I am sober´´. I focused my mind in sobriety and so I attracted into my life sobriety. I just spent one day in rehab and I was like ´´i don´t want to be like them, so i am changing.´´ And the change happened. 

All the best. :happy:


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## KattyLu (Dec 1, 2016)

I once had one which lasted 48 hours when I was in my early 20s.... a long night, starting with beer, then wine with dinner, spirits after it, probably would have been nothing had H. not decided to crack open the case of port he'd gotten from his godfather. Pint glasses of port at 2am- bad idea, let me tell ya. Port must be stuffed full of those congenor things she writes about above. F-me, the next day, couldn't even drink a sip of water without puking, dry puking... eventually it was just hold myself in bed and say to myself if I just lie still it will eventually go. Finally could begin to drink and eat scraps 40+ hours later, probably not clear for another 24 after that. Alcohol is horrible. By the way, read the article Best Essential Oils for Hangovers, Useful Tips and Easy-to-make Recipes


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