# xNFP - ambivert?



## aquirkynerd (Mar 26, 2015)

Hello to anyone whose clicked on this 

I'm wondering whether I am INFP or ENFP. I know quite a bit about both really, and I'm not new to MBTI or to PerC, but I can't seem to be fully satisfied with a type when it comes to myself. I feel as though I was definitely an INFP child, but I wonder how much of that was externally influenced and whether or not I am truly ENFP as I come into my own person? 

Lately I feel as though both fit very well but neither "perfectly" - one just feels too extroverted and one too introverted. Most interestingly, I feel as though there is very little discrepancy between my favouring of cognitive functions. My Ne and Ni are apparently very developed, but equally so according to most studies and tests I've done. My Fi trumps my Fe, but again, quite slightly. I often end up with Fi-Fe-Ni-Ne, and often score as Ni/Ne - Fi/Fe. The only thing that seems to remain pretty consistent is Se as my most inferior function. 

Is it possible to really lie just smack bang in the middle of these two? Any thoughts/input from anyone? 

thank you x


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## bigstupidgrin (Sep 26, 2014)

It doesn't help that they are so similar, that I've heard some ENFPs aren't especially extroverted, and INFPs (I assume I am INFP, just because the general 4 letter tests say that) can have enneagrams 7s, which look like the description of ENFP personalities.

I can only talk of stereotypes, so take this with a grain of salt: INFPs are prone to over-commitment, and ENFPs (supposedly) are commitment-adverse. *shrugs*

Hopefully people (ENFP and INFP) will respond that are very confident in their types.

Edit: one thing about me that says INFP>ENFP is that I notice my Si much more than my Te in real life (not in function tests). Do you notice a preference of Si or Te over the other?


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## Repuli (May 2, 2015)

I'll join the club.

Did several tests and read descriptions until my head hurt. The results didn't really feel so out of place, having almost constantly very balanced results between them both and descriptions from both side felt very familiar. As if i was too much I and yet too little E.
It was same with Ni,Ne,Si and Se. Only with Fe and Ti i could feel extremely notable difference from Te Fi and each test pretty much confirmed it. Then i just figured that the need for something new constantly, spontaneous acting, carefree view must make me definite P. Answering some test questions also feel super weird when both alternatives feel tempting.
All in all it feels really weird, i look into many posts from different types and i feel connection with pretty much all of them to some extend and yet there's always something that feels off, usually it's that they are missing something and that my own identification isn't as strong as theirs.

Kinda makes these all personality types feel pointless to my own eye, even though i know that there is lot's of difference between them.
But i suppose the good side is that i feel equally intrigued by most people and can see myself somewhat enjoying everybody's company. Though i'm uncertain if my own mediocrity feels dull to others. I mean my only really visible trait is my strong affection towards people i like but if it comes in passive or active form depends. Pairing that with need for new experiences every now and then, well it's not that practical combination really. 

Lately though it seems i have unconsciously noted how empty that ends up leaving me and apparently started developing inferior side or just not giving hold to dominating that much.


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## Tridentus (Dec 14, 2009)

INFPs- Heart absolutely dominates head, and will be completely unmoving from moral convictions 99% of the time.
ENFPs- Have trouble choosing between heart and head. Heart obviously has an advantage, but we're also very analytical and regulating about how we rationalize our emotions.

That right there is the best differentiator you will ever read, it's simple and it's clear. If your Fi clearly dominates Te, to a no-contest degree you are INFP. ENFPs have a huge amount of inner conflict between Fi and Te- to the point where we can end up going back and forth between Fi and Te decisions, struggling to find a balance that seems right.


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## aquirkynerd (Mar 26, 2015)

Tridentus:17319898 said:


> INFPs- Heart absolutely dominates head, and will be completely unmoving from moral convictions 99% of the time.
> ENFPs- Have trouble choosing between heart and head. Heart obviously has an advantage, but we're also very analytical and regulating about how we rationalize our emotions.
> 
> That right there is the best differentiator you will ever read, it's simple and it's clear. If your Fi clearly dominates Te, to a no-contest degree you are INFP. ENFPs have a huge amount of inner conflict between Fi and Te- to the point where we can end up going back and forth between Fi and Te decisions, struggling to find a balance that seems right.


This is interesting. I have no problem at all in identifying and rationalizing emotions in myself and in others. My moral compass is strong, but I am very tolerant about other peoples conflicting morals when I think about motives/who they are. I might not agree with them, and it doesn't make it okay, but I understand them and that's half the battle for me. A lot of the time though, I will feel a real Fi passion bubbling to the surface if I hear something "morally wrong" and I need to step back and rationalise things before anything. In that sense, I think my Fe dominates with conflict: I would be slow to confront someone for being awful, maybe they've got other things on, maybe I've more important things to think of. I think that my Fi is very strong, but so is my Fe. My Te and Si are not nearly as developed as my F and N functions (which are also relatively equal). See to me, I don't understand how someone would refuse to see something from all angles, and this is why I question being an INFP as most are very clearly Fi dom. While I might have a very strong opinion on something, I will try to see different perspectives: but not pushed upon me, I need to realise them and think about them myself, in my head. Which I guess is pretty Ne, the angles thing. 

I don't know xD


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## ElliCat (May 4, 2014)

aquirkynerd said:


> In that sense, I think my Fe dominates with conflict: I would be slow to confront someone for being awful, maybe they've got other things on, maybe I've more important things to think of.


That doesn't sound like Fe. Fe believes there is an objective right and wrong, and if someone's acting inappropriately, to the point where it's disturbing the harmony, they do not hesitate to set the wrongdoer back on the right path. Thinking about the possible reasons why they might do something shitty sounds more like Ne; I do it too. We're more interested in _intent_ rather than whether the action itself is "right" or "wrong".



> I think that my Fi is very strong, but so is my Fe. My Te and Si are not nearly as developed as my F and N functions (which are also relatively equal).


I believe according to Socionics, xNFP's have a pretty good command of Fe... they just don't value it or enjoy using it that much. 

Te and Si are both going to be relatively unconscious still. I think having nearly even Fi and Ne just sounds like you're on track to becoming a well-developed adult.



> See to me, I don't understand how someone would refuse to see something from all angles, and this is why I question being an INFP as most are very clearly Fi dom. While I might have a very strong opinion on something, I will try to see different perspectives: but not pushed upon me, I need to realise them and think about them myself, in my head. Which I guess is pretty Ne, the angles thing.


A well-developed INFP does also like to see different perspectives... we believe that every individual has their own values and their own experiences and that those will lead them to different conclusions. It's up to each individual to find themselves and what they value, and to hold onto that. We don't have a problem with people valuing different things to us; we have a problem with people pushing those values onto us, because Fi believes that one can only control their inner world. We might defend our core values - and with Te we can come across very strongly in this - but we don't expect other people to adopt them. Not unless they choose to do it themselves, anyway! 

The difference between us and ENFP's is that we'll discount some ideas more easily than Ne-doms - like if something clearly goes against my values, or even if it's something so minor as "I don't feel like it", I'm happy to put an idea aside. Ne-doms in my experience have more trouble narrowing down their Ne brain farts, because "you just don't know until you try!" 

That and inferior Te vs. inferior Si. What are you like when you're stressed?


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## anaraqueen (May 14, 2015)

Tridentus said:


> INFPs- Heart absolutely dominates head, and will be completely unmoving from moral convictions 99% of the time.
> ENFPs- Have trouble choosing between heart and head. Heart obviously has an advantage, but we're also very analytical and regulating about how we rationalize our emotions.
> 
> That right there is the best differentiator you will ever read, it's simple and it's clear. If your Fi clearly dominates Te, to a no-contest degree you are INFP. ENFPs have a huge amount of inner conflict between Fi and Te- to the point where we can end up going back and forth between Fi and Te decisions, struggling to find a balance that seems right.


wow according to this i'm an INFP because my Te (and my Ti as well) are my lowest cognitive functions. On the other hand my Ne is much more developed than my Fi so I don't know? I've felt I'm more of an ENFP (or even a ENFJ bc strong Fe) than INFP now I'm confused help


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## RubiksCubix (Oct 29, 2014)

aquirkynerd said:


> This is interesting. I have no problem at all in identifying and rationalizing emotions in myself and in others. My moral compass is strong, but I am very tolerant about other peoples conflicting morals when I think about motives/who they are. I might not agree with them, and it doesn't make it okay, but I understand them and that's half the battle for me. A lot of the time though, I will feel a real Fi passion bubbling to the surface if I hear something "morally wrong" and I need to step back and rationalise things before anything. In that sense, I think my Fe dominates with conflict: I would be slow to confront someone for being awful, maybe they've got other things on, maybe I've more important things to think of. I think that my Fi is very strong, but so is my Fe. My Te and Si are not nearly as developed as my F and N functions (which are also relatively equal). See to me, I don't understand how someone would refuse to see something from all angles, and this is why I question being an INFP as most are very clearly Fi dom. While I might have a very strong opinion on something, I will try to see different perspectives: but not pushed upon me, I need to realise them and think about them myself, in my head. Which I guess is pretty Ne, the angles thing.
> 
> I don't know xD


I think that you are an ENFP. Your ability to back up and rationalize sounds like tertiary Te coming in.


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## aquirkynerd (Mar 26, 2015)

ElliCat said:


> What are you like when you're stressed?


That's a good question. 

Around exams and deadlines and particularly hefty decision making, I will not even feel stressed most of the time and instead just see the results physically: tired skin, dark circles, dramatic weight loss, loss of appetite. I usually know that on some subconscious level I'm stressed, but I don't usually feel it in those situations.

In deciding moments, generally pretty important ones: day before an exam, should I forgive them, will I call them back, etc. I lose my mind altogether. I usually slip into a far more philosophically upset state than the previous "I am stressed" state and ponder everything, usually ending up at "am I a good person? Am I a good role model? Is this really what I want my life to be?" which is pretty irrational I think. I go quiet and am extremely irritable before arriving at those questions and there's really no point in talking to me.

I usually don't realise any relief when I'm stressed. I suppose the relief comes when I'm actually doing something, like sitting an exam, talking to that person, generally being active about my life and making conscious decisions about things. But I generally don't feel like I'm stressed or not. It's a very gradual thing to me. I think that in the run up to something, I might start being stressed about a month in advance, have a "what is life" moment and then come back down slowly over about a month to normality. 

I like working under pressure and I'm an extreme procrastinator. I always reach deadlines but I might do a three month project in three weeks, although this rarely if ever contributes significantly to my stress levels. I kind of do things as I feel like it, and get stressed when it becomes something I have to do rather than actually having a choice in the matter.


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## Jewl (Feb 28, 2012)

aquirkynerd said:


> That's a good question.
> 
> Around exams and deadlines and particularly hefty decision making, I will not even feel stressed most of the time and instead just see the results physically: tired skin, dark circles, dramatic weight loss, loss of appetite. I usually know that on some subconscious level I'm stressed, but I don't usually feel it in those situations.
> 
> ...


This actually sounds somewhat like inferior Si. You withdraw into yourself. You become quiet, reserved, and let stuff sit in your head. You think a lot. Unsure of your thoughts and yourself. Triggers of inferior Si can be just sheer exhaustion. But it also tends to be stuff like projects or exams or certain life situations that require lots of energy. 

Anyways, just the withdrawing into your head implies that your inferior function might just be Introverted. 

This is actually how I get stressed as well. I deal with it fine all the way up to the very moment I'm about to have to confront stuff. Then I basically sink into mini-depression, and I question _everything_. And in those moments, I can become very self-deprecating. 

That said, do you have a Type-Me thread I could look at? That would be helpful.  You sound incredibly interesting. To score so high on both Ne/Ni and Fe/Fi. At least we know the probability of you preferring Se/Si over Intuition is incredibly low. That and I think Thinking is totally out of the ballgame. ^_^ 

You mentioned that on cognitive functions tests, you score lowest on Se. That actually might be pointing towards a preference for Si. I would score higher on Si too on cognitive functions tests sometimes. Because the Se stuff was just kind of ... irrelevant. like I could take it or leave it. Depends on the test, though. That and inferior Se sounds nothing like what you just described to me.


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## ElliCat (May 4, 2014)

aquirkynerd said:


> That's a good question.
> 
> Around exams and deadlines and particularly hefty decision making, I will not even feel stressed most of the time and instead just see the results physically: tired skin, dark circles, dramatic weight loss, loss of appetite. I usually know that on some subconscious level I'm stressed, but I don't usually feel it in those situations.
> 
> ...


Based on that, I'm going to say no to INFP. That's not inferior Te. 

I'm glad @Julia Bell recognised it as possibly inferior Si - I'm still getting a grasp on it, but not being fully aware of feeling your stress does sound like it to me.


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## aquirkynerd (Mar 26, 2015)

Julia Bell said:


> This actually sounds somewhat like inferior Si. You withdraw into yourself. You become quiet, reserved, and let stuff sit in your head. You think a lot. Unsure of your thoughts and yourself. Triggers of inferior Si can be just sheer exhaustion. But it also tends to be stuff like projects or exams or certain life situations that require lots of energy.
> 
> Anyways, just the withdrawing into your head implies that your inferior function might just be Introverted.
> 
> ...


This post gave me butterflies :3
Thank you, that was a really, super helpful and reassuring post to read. I can resonate a LOT with the things you just highlighted and your rationalisation of my Si/Se preferences makes tonnes of sense. The inferior Si thing really gets me too... Hugs for your empathy in philosophical stress 

I've never heard of Type-Me actually... Any links or references? I'd be happy to fill it out


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## Jewl (Feb 28, 2012)

aquirkynerd said:


> This post gave me butterflies :3
> Thank you, that was a really, super helpful and reassuring post to read. I can resonate a LOT with the things you just highlighted and your rationalisation of my Si/Se preferences makes tonnes of sense. The inferior Si thing really gets me too... Hugs for your empathy in philosophical stress
> 
> I've never heard of Type-Me actually... Any links or references? I'd be happy to fill it out


You're so welcome! ^_^ I'm glad it was helpful. Well, it's not a for sure inferior-Si thing. I'll be able to tell more definitively if you fill out a What's My Type questionnaire. Here's where you can post a Type Me thread.  What's my personality type?


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## LaSylphide (Aug 30, 2012)

I think you can be an ambivert. Some people seem to overly subscribe to this theory of personality and believe everything is 100% hard and fast, but there probably is some leeway here and there. (It's not like this theory has been so rigorously tested that it's officially 100% correct and the be-all-and-end-all of personality....eg the theory of intuition and whether it is valid or just a more subtle/conscious form of sensing, but that's another argument for another time/thread...) 

However, I wouldn't be surprised if most ambiverts do show a general preference for one side. Maybe with time you'll discover you have a preference. I'm mostly ambiverted too, but I recognise that I definitely lean towards the introverted side. My confusion lies with my problems with depression and anxiety, I'm definitely more introverted when going through a rough patch, but when I'm coping better and generally more "well", I'm less introverted, so it makes it hard to tell for sure. Not everything is as cut-and-dry as some people make out, I think.


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