# Career woes



## essthetic (May 17, 2018)

Hello all! I am wondering if being the insightful people you are, someone may be able to help me out here. As you see I’m not typed, but I am certain that I am an F. Probably NF. My parents are not helpful in this career matter, and most of my friends are either in the same boat, or very different from me.

The background is, I’m a graphic designer. I have a liberal arts degree and my major was graphic arts. For the past several years I’ve worked in different industries and environments, and the same issues seem to come up. I like the field and practice of graphic design, but I don’t think I like it as a career. 

I tried freelancing, but I’m not at a point where I can make enough to support myself, nor can I manage all the getting clients, invoices, health insurance, taxes, etc. and on top of that design without getting overwhelmed, at least at this point. Namely, having to be creative on demand and not “when the inspiration strikes” has been difficult, and especially working for people who a) treat designers like admins who just draw pretty pictures and color, and devalue the field, and b) have the worst ideas and expect us to be photoshop robots to bring to life their crappy ideas haha. Ahem. I digress..:blushed:

It’s probably that.. design is so *personal* to me, that I have a hard time taking constructive criticism without then telling myself I suck and should be doing something else. 

Other things that are difficult for me is that I’m not highly extroverted but not highly introverted either. I like to be able to interact and collaborate with people at work but I do like my downtime too.. I also just get very bored once I learn the job. I crave variety in my day, even if I am just able to get up from my desk somewhat often. I don’t feel like I’ve had a voice to express ideas that I’ve had in the companies I’ve worked for, being “just a designer.” I also lack meaning for most of the jobs I work for.. most companies that do have some positive impact in the world seem to be nonprofits with salaries that I can’t exactly afford to live on.

I’ve considered doing something like physical therapy assistant or nutritionist. Human Resources management would be less schooling. Or even cosmetology school.. but nothing really calls out to me more than the others and it’s hard to know if I’ll even end up in the same place I am now. Also, I am trying to avoid careers that are likely to be automated in the near future . 

Recently, I have been working as a freelancer, but I’m either working over 40 hours a week, or have no jobs for a few weeks straight. It’s feast or famine. I like variety but I also need some form of stability. “I like routine, until I get bored, then I need adventure. Until I get overwhelmed, then I need routine.”

I just started a new job as an admin assistant last week through a personal reference. It is okay so far.. it’s draining keeping track of everything but I know that once I get used to it, I will get bored. I am wondering if it would be a good time to go back to school while doing this job, as it seems less stressful so far than places I’ve worked in the past, so I may have the headspace for it. But I just turned.. well let’s say I’m just over 27... and I’m cautious because of my finances. Oh and I’m single, so I don’t know how schooling would affect any future relationships or even prevent the ability to get into a solid relationship. 

I hope I don’t sound like a lazy entitled millennial. I want to work, but I don’t know where I fit in.


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## essthetic (May 17, 2018)

I should add, I’d rather have a family than a high-paying career. Despite how...whatever that may sound. But I don’t right now, and I have to plan for myself if it doesn’t happen. :sad:


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## essthetic (May 17, 2018)

Hmm can I delete this?


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## Handsome Dyke (Oct 4, 2012)

I don't know whether you still want advice. In case you do, here it is:

Looking to a career for fulfillment is a mistake. The entire concept of working for someone else makes it clear that jobs are not designed to be enjoyable (although people involved with startups seem to be trying to buck that trend). You can drive yourself crazy and waste years seeking just the right career. Even as a freelancer you are limited by the market and your clients.

I'd stick with the admin job and enjoy the lack of stress. Think about how bad your job _could_ be when you get bored. Use your free time and hobbies to do stuff you enjoy and find important. You can even fill up your free time with so much stuff that you are glad to have that low-stress admin job. Don't spend anything more than a few hundred dollars on further education. You can job-hop (change jobs periodically) or freelance on the side to spice things up.


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## essthetic (May 17, 2018)

Bonereaper Benty said:


> I don't know whether you still want advice. In case you do, here it is:
> 
> Looking to a career for fulfillment is a mistake. The entire concept of working for someone else makes it clear that jobs are not designed to be enjoyable (although people involved with startups seem to be trying to buck that trend). You can drive yourself crazy and waste years seeking just the right career. Even as a freelancer you are limited by the market and your clients.
> 
> I'd stick with the admin job and enjoy the lack of stress. Think about how bad your job _could_ be when you get bored. Use your free time and hobbies to do stuff you enjoy and find important. You can even fill up your free time with so much stuff that you are glad to have that low-stress admin job. Don't spend anything more than a few hundred dollars on further education. You can job-hop (change jobs periodically) or freelance on the side to spice things up.



I was feeling insecure that there were no responses haha :facepalm: 

Thanks for your input! What you’re saying makes a lot of sense.. and confirms what advice I’ve been getting too.I would like to maybe do some side projects while having a day job that could always turn into something. It’s just that lack of planning has kind of gotten me to where I am now so I feel like if i’m not planning for at least the next two years I’m going to end up in a worse place. I don’t know :/ I mean I was looking at some software to help out with a scheduling issue with my job and some are so advanced I thought I better not present it to my boss because he won’t need me. Haha.


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## chad86tsi (Dec 27, 2016)

I am an INFP, and was very skilled in various arts, and equally skilled and interested in science and engineering early in life. I was very accomplished in art (award winning), but found the coursework of science and engineering laborious. At the end of my high school career I had to choose, I didn't choose art. I have found art very satisfying and necessary in my life, to have an outlet. I also saw that it would never provide me or my family with the life that I wanted to have. I set art aside as a hobby and focused on more practical skills. I went into electrical engineering. 

I still use art as an escape, it just isn't for "work". I fabricate and invent things as a hobby as well, but I find it's not as much fun with a customer waiting on me. I found it best to do the work on my own time and my own terms, then sell it at my leisure. I still get my outlet, I still make $$ doing it, and I don't stress myself out over it. Engineering pays the bills, and is very stable.

My advice, disconnect passion from paying the bills. Few ever make it work right, so don't think that is "the goal" where failure is internalized.

You say you aren't typed, why not? knowledge is power.


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## essthetic (May 17, 2018)

chad86tsi said:


> I am an INFP, and was very skilled in various arts, and equally skilled and interested in science and engineering early in life. I was very accomplished in art (award winning), but found the coursework of science and engineering laborious. At the end of my high school career I had to choose, I didn't choose art. I have found art very satisfying and necessary in my life, to have an outlet. I also saw that it would never provide me or my family with the life that I wanted to have. I set art aside as a hobby and focused on more practical skills. I went into electrical engineering.
> 
> I still use art as an escape, it just isn't for "work". I fabricate and invent things as a hobby as well, but I find it's not as much fun with a customer waiting on me. I found it best to do the work on my own time and my own terms, then sell it at my leisure. I still get my outlet, I still make $$ doing it, and I don't stress myself out over it. Engineering pays the bills, and is very stable.
> 
> ...


Thank you! 

This helps.. I wish I made a decision like you did earlier on. I don’t know if this admin thing is going to work out long term as far as salary and lifestyle, especially if I’m gonna stay an old spinster  I’m trying to see what kind of careers may be more stable but also that I can succeed in (I could never do engineering, but can see myself in healthcare). it’s just a matter of starting kind of late and whether I want to take on loans and spend time in school. 

And absolutely the internalized failure is a huge struggle for me. I notice designers that succeed in the field aren’t as attached to their work. 

I am not typed because I swear I use both Ne and Se, haha.. I find my cognitive functions to be pretty close on each dichotomy, depending on the situation. According to an INTJ I know, but only online, I am most likely ENFP.. but I haven’t settled on it as some things I don’t think line up. I will make a what is my type post soon  I’m probably more indecisive about type than my career ha! I would say most likely types for me are any of the NFs, then maybe ISFP, then SFJs.


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## chad86tsi (Dec 27, 2016)

essthetic said:


> Thank you!
> 
> This helps.. I wish I made a decision like you did earlier on. I don’t know if this admin thing is going to work out long term as far as salary and lifestyle, especially if I’m gonna stay an old spinster  I’m trying to see what kind of careers may be more stable but also that I can succeed in (I could never do engineering, but can see myself in healthcare). it’s just a matter of starting kind of late and whether I want to take on loans and spend time in school.
> 
> ...


What do the myers briggs tests say you are? I've taken the test 4 time in 20 years under different circumstances, I have always come up INFP. I have however seen the scores shift. Many tests will show you your score as a percentage, say extroversion/introversion, you might score 52/48, where another scores 90/10.  Both are characterized as extroverts, but one will be much more extroverted than the other. My wife is 51/49, and sometimes 49/51, she has traits of both. It's not uncommon to have a trait that is borderline, and that knowledge can then be used to see how you sometimes acts like another "type".

In some types, there are sub-types, in INFP there is type A (assertive), and type T (turbulent). I have all the same feelings as an average INFP, but they tend not to keep me from taking care of things or making progress towards personal goals. Type isn't a box with firm walls, it's just a generalization. Typing yourself can be useful for seeing where you might best fit in the workplace, but I would never end up where I am if I had done that. I'm pretty happy with where I'm at, so take that as a cautionary note about not being rigid in your interpretation of what might work for you. There aren't many INFP engineers, but I'm pretty good at it. I think my creativity an open mind helps, and I learned how to manage idealism long ago. Default traits can be managed and/or exploited in novel ways.


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## AriesLilith (Jan 6, 2013)

Would you consider working in IT as UX/UI designer? On consulting firms where one can change projects every few months or longer or shorter.
At least here where I live I work in IT consulting firms and it’s been how life is. Every period I change to another project, learn new stuffs then we also usually work at clients so things are often different. The positive side is that you taste change often, you often keep learning and doing new things. On the other hand you might not form long term closer relationships because you and your coworkers are often changing.

But IT can be great for stability and money as well as work conditions. It’s a growing field where one can even change roles but still provide value given the learned skills. You can also freelance and work remotely if you find an opportunity.


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## essthetic (May 17, 2018)

I’ve gotten different results.. I usually border around 50% for E/I and S/N.. usually I’m over 80%+ F and maybe 60% P.. but I’ve gotten J on other tests.. I’m turbulent for sure. I believe for the official test I took online about 3 years ago, it typed me ENFP but since I was border N and s they asked more questions and finally typed me ESFP. Soooo idk. Clinical anxiety has made typing more difficult as I feel like I’m always adapting to avoid anxious situations.

how would you type me (based on these three posts, haha)

It sounds like your Te might be well developed for an INFP but yeah, type really does seem like a spectrum as you say.


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## Mick Travis (Aug 18, 2016)

I was on my way to becoming an in demand CG artist in the 80's. I'm definitely and artist 1st, so I left that scene. I'm happily a dishwasher now. I intend to eventually take some vo-tech courses to get me a care taking job in a nursing home when I'm 70.


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## Eu_citzen (Jan 18, 2018)

Find a job that doesn't make you miserable, creativity can be well practiced in your spare time.
If just one job is to dull, do several part-time jobs. I wish someone gave me that advice when I was younger.


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## chad86tsi (Dec 27, 2016)

essthetic said:


> I’ve gotten different results.. I usually border around 50% for E/I and S/N.. usually I’m over 80%+ F and maybe 60% P.. but I’ve gotten J on other tests.. I’m turbulent for sure. I believe for the official test I took online about 3 years ago, it typed me ENFP but since I was border N and s they asked more questions and finally typed me ESFP. Soooo idk. Clinical anxiety has made typing more difficult as I feel like I’m always adapting to avoid anxious situations.
> 
> how would you type me (based on these three posts, haha)
> 
> It sounds like your Te might be well developed for an INFP but yeah, type really does seem like a spectrum as you say.


I was going to type you as INFP, but with higher score in the extroversion scale than most, an outgoing introvert if you will, that's what I call my wife. Doesn't' so much mind people and can work in a person-centric job with decent success like an extrovert, but still needs the "away to herself" time like an introvert. I see a lot of INFP's that represent the "stereotypical" traits are much more introverted than you or I am. They are what many see as quintessential INFP'ism even though they are not actual majority.

INFP's often have anxiety issues from what I have seen, thinking too much about too many things is bound to lead to anxiety. It is my go-to place when I'm not well regulated or disconnected from my outlets.

Just so you know, 27 is not too late to start over, don't beat yourself up any more. Everything up to this point has been learned and acquired knowledge, you get to take that with you. See it as a benefit, an asset. I worked in retail in highschool and college, I work in engineering now. I use a lot of that life experience gained in retail in my current career. It was not wasted time, and a lot of those skills transfer in ways I'd not have ever expected. Especially soft skills, stuff you don't learn in a school or from a mentor.

My scores:
E/I 30/70
N/S 100/0
F/T 60/40
P/J 73/27

No two people are alike within any category.


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## Mick Travis (Aug 18, 2016)

Eu_citzen said:


> creativity can be well practiced in your spare time.


It's nice to work where creativity in encouraged. If we always follow the rules, how will we evolve?


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## Eu_citzen (Jan 18, 2018)

Mick Travis said:


> It's nice to work where creativity in encouraged. If we always follow the rules, how will we evolve?


While I agree such a workplace is lovely, they are also rare. At least so in my experience.


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## Mick Travis (Aug 18, 2016)

Eu_citzen said:


> While I agree such a workplace is lovely, they are also rare. At least so in my experience.


May as well push it until you get fired then.


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## Eu_citzen (Jan 18, 2018)

Mick Travis said:


> May as well push it until you get fired then.


Tried that. Colleges loved it, management less so..


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## Mick Travis (Aug 18, 2016)

Eu_citzen said:


> management less so..


I love it when management squirms.


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