# Strangers approaching you



## rhoynarqueen (Dec 12, 2014)

Do strangers, or people you barely know, often approach you, and have deep conversations with you about personal issues, mental illness, weird dreams, bad childhoods, etc? 

How do you react? 

If so, what is your type? 

_________________________ 

I'm ENTJ. This happens to me constantly. I love it. I like trying to figure people out, piece things together and stuff. I don't care how weird the person is or what they're telling me. It always makes for good writing in a novel, or just to think about later on. 

Why people choose to approach me of all people, I don't know, haha.


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## VinnieBob (Mar 24, 2014)

my parents told me to never talk to strangers and I still hold that credo
I avoid that situation at all costs


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## MuChApArAdOx (Jan 24, 2011)

Yes, the secrets I carry in my head directly relates with strangers approaching me. My bestie is an ENTJ, he thinks I'm a bit crazy, which is true, ha !...There is nothing I can't tell him, and like me nothing shocks him. I rarely ever bring up my problems or troubles, he Insists I talk about it, why IDK. He likes to pick things apart like I do I think, also it amuses him when we talk about crazy random things that only I can get myself into, haha!......then there are others who tell me more than I want to hear, however I will listen and offer advice only If I can relate it through my own personal experiences. I guess the way I see it is this. We all have problems at some point in our life, we can let them define us, or strengthen us. If I'm having a pity party which I must add doesn't happen often, I dwell on it alone, I don't want to include others. Sometimes I feel forced to help people, or listen to things I don't care about. It isn't easy for me to pretend to be interested when I'm not. Only when I can relate with it on a personal level can I be of any assistance. I wish people wouldn't trust me so fast, I have enough useless info floating around in my disorganized brain, and maybe it annoys me a bit that people think they know me well enough to know what I may or maybe do with that information.


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## ScientiaOmnisEst (Oct 2, 2013)

The most I've had is random people on public transport trying to start a conversation about me or what I'm reading/doing, small talk stuff. That alone weirds me out and I tend to just answer their questions to end the conversation and make them go away. I can't imagine how much I would freak out if someone started just going on about something personal. Like, "Who are you and why are you talking to me, about anything, much less this?"


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## Clyme (Jul 17, 2014)

rhoynarqueen said:


> Do strangers, or people you barely know, often approach you, and have deep conversations with you about personal issues, mental illness, weird dreams, bad childhoods, etc?
> 
> How do you react?
> 
> ...


I'm an INTJ.

No, this doesn't happen at all to me really. I mean, usually if this happens at all, I have some familiarity with them. There are a few times where I've had conversations with people through work, like with customers, but it was never some random person on the street. In those situations, the only people who have ever really approached me on the street are creeps and people who are under the influence of drugs. In any case though, I'm very antisocial and tend to turn people away very quickly in those situations. If anybody approaches me randomly on the street, I kick into some highly defensive mode.


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## Gossip Goat (Nov 19, 2013)

No. I wish it happened though, that sounds fun. Plus talking to people and having meaningful conversations with them make me happy.

I'm ISFJ


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## elpis (Mar 24, 2013)

Yes, strangers share way too personal information with me often. I don't know what it is about me that makes them want to tell me this stuff. Why would a gas station attendant tell me about the scabies she got from her boyfriend? Who knows? God forbid I tell anyone I work at a hospital because then I get to hear about every medical problem they ever had. My reaction is pretty deadpan no matter how crazy the strangers story is. 

This one time I treated a mentally ill patient in ER. He told me he's going to Baltimore soon to get his knee fixed(we were in Montana). 
I asked him "Why Baltimore?" 
He said "Well you know I'm possessed by the devil right?" 
I held my deadpan expression and replied, "Oh thats right! Well then it makes sense you'd go to Baltimore for knee surgery." 
He nodded in agreement. I finished up the treatment, wished ole Beelzebub safe travels and went on my way. The Prince of Darkness was a lot nicer than I would have expected, and fatter, and smellier. Who knew?

I'm INTP


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## Harizu (Apr 27, 2014)

This has never occurred to me.
Strangers at most approach me to ask for directions or to ask me to take a photo of them with their mobiles. The usual.
At times it happened to me to have some conversations that were a little longer with people.
When I was 13 a man on the bus approached me and told me I looked like his friend's daughter, but then I had to get off the bus and it ended there.
Another time when I was with my friends a drunk man approached us and started telling us what he thought about us. The only thing I was able to understand is that he said I looked intelligent.
Then people in the street have stopped me many times to talk to me about their religion and try to "convert" me (of course, they never succeeded).
But I've never had any real, deep conversation with a stranger. I think that their not being able to tell wich gender I am most of the times (due to how I dress/talk/look) and my being loud or looking weird or quirky when I'm with my friends (because I hardly ever go out on my own) are the major causes why people don't approach me that often.


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## reveur (Oct 26, 2014)

I once had a conversation on the train with a stranger who claimed that dolphins have been walking on earth before us, but they realized that it's a stupid thing to do and got back to the water and now they're laughing at our stupidity.

I've been listening to him with all my heart, because he really enjoyed what he talked about and it was nice to watch such commitment to an unusual idea. Plus - I felt strangely comfortable in his company.

He said that I'm weird, since nobody ever listens to him and treats him like an idiot - not a person, and he wishes to me that I'd never adapt to _them_.

INFJ.

Sometimes I think about him.


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## JTHearts (Aug 6, 2013)

No, nobody ever approaches me, supposedly because my body language is saying "leave me alone"


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## AriesLilith (Jan 6, 2013)

Sometimes some people starts random conversations with me or everyone around, and usually I don't mind and am polite as long as the person doesn't make me feel suspicious or uncomfortable.

Some are friendly old people, some are extroverted people, some are looking for trouble, some just want to be nice, and some wants to score. I enjoy how people generally are here in Portugal as they are friendly and generally respectful and non intrusive. An introvert like me can go unnoticed if I want, and if me or anyone comments on something that is happening in the moment people can respond in a friendly manner or not say much.
I wouldn't enjoy being in a place that is too introverted and lack of friendliness. >_<


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## Im FiNe (Oct 17, 2013)

INFP
I don't really spend much time in public. I avoid crowds whenever possible. I am almost always inside my house. Opportunities for that type of interaction are, therefore, not very great.


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## IDontThinkSo (Aug 24, 2011)

It frequently happened when I lived in town, I usually react friendly, unless it's a silly request, like recently when that girl stopped her car to ask me if she could touch my hair. wtf

ENTP (though generally people type my face infp)


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## Coldspot (Nov 7, 2011)

Most people don't have the chance to have a deep conversation with me. Whenever someone tries to start some small talk with me, my response has a "piss off" vibe to it.

INFP


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## Fern (Sep 2, 2012)

Why has this never happened to me?!

Oh, yeah. It's because my neutral facial expression frightens children :blushed:

'Dat 8 wing 'do.


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## EccentricSiren (Sep 3, 2013)

I'm an INFP, and this used to happen to me a lot. It made me uncomfortable, because I wanted to be helpful but I had no idea how. It doesn't happen much anymore. Years of performing onstage in rather seedy places gave me that "don't you dare approach me" look which seems to have become permanently embedded in my body language.


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## Metalize (Dec 18, 2014)

Prior to cultivating my "piss off" face, I'd get pestered a lot by people for different reasons. Well, any amount is too much for me. I think I just have a naturally ditzy expression so I looked like I'm harmless, I guess?? 

Nowadays, noticeably not as much. roud: Mission successful.

INTJ


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## Mammon (Jul 12, 2012)

vinniebob said:


> my parents told me to never talk to strangers and I still hold that credo
> I avoid that situation at all costs


We're all strangers here. 














TALK TO ME


Ontopic. Not that often, and I dislike it when people do. I'm too awkward for this shit. Leave me alone plox.


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## Arno (Apr 2, 2012)

People approaching me? I've never heard of such concept. *Sob*


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution (Oct 8, 2013)

Doesn't happen naturally probably due to my general confused or resting bitch face. I'm generally awkward when people talk to me in queues or something. It surprises me that people want to talk to me like...k?


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## SmartBart (Jul 23, 2014)

When I had a mohawk and a studded jacket I got approached all the time by seniors. Regular chit-chat, nothing too deep. 
Although, when playing MMORPGs, people tend to open up a lot, only after a few shared lines. I wonder why.


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## HowDareThey (Dec 31, 2010)

People used to approach me a lot when I was young, but it wasn't always pleasant or appropriate. And a first meeting is only rarely a good time for deep convo. It's all a judgment call, I guess. Depending on how people come across, people being too deep on first meeting can creep me out. There are times here and there where you really "click" with someone like rarely with someone else.


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## Word Dispenser (May 18, 2012)

I'm the stranger that approaches other strangers.

But, nothing personal. 

I once asked a girl about a scar on her neck.


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## ForestPaix (Aug 30, 2014)

Yes. I'm not sure why either, but I don't mind. I'm an ISFP and I listen and nod and sympathise.


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## TwinAnthos (Aug 11, 2014)

My istp "casual " look scares them off, I can therfore not contribute more since I yet to form a reaction to something that has never happend.


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## HowDareThey (Dec 31, 2010)

Word Dispenser said:


> I'm the stranger that approaches other strangers.
> 
> But, nothing personal.
> 
> I once asked a girl about a scar on her neck.


Ooh, I wouldn't be happy about a stranger approaching me and asking a personal question. Boundaries! I wouldn't appreciate a question like that until I knew someone a little while. Or maybe, not at all.


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## Word Dispenser (May 18, 2012)

HowDareThey said:


> Ooh, I wouldn't be happy about a stranger approaching me and asking a personal question. Boundaries! I wouldn't appreciate a question like that until I knew someone a little while. Or maybe, not at all.


Well, she sat beside me on a bus. I had burning curiosity about it, and love stories. I knew that I shouldn't ask, but couldn't help myself.

I apologized for asking, and I _think _I did it in an appropriate way, because she wasn't at all offended by it. She was quite nice. roud: It also kind of helps being a foreigner in this country. There's a certain charm associated with me because of it.


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## Bel Esprit (Aug 2, 2011)

I have a tendency to put off people you would consider "normal," but often attract what you would consider "weirdos." I don't mind talking to the homeless or socially shunned so long as I'm not fearing for my life. People refuse to take the time to talk to these people because a) They're busy with their so called life (work, errands, etc.) b) Feel they have nothing to learn from these types of people (ie. Why should I talk to a low-life like that?) c) Are afraid of them

I admit to being annoyed when I'm busy with something and a stranger approaches me and attempts to engage in conversation. Then again I'm a naturally awkward person and loathe small talk (not always for that reason.) But if they have something interesting to say I'm more than willing to talk. (Unless I fear for my life.)


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## outofplace (Dec 19, 2012)

Strangers approaching me to talk about deep matters, no. Co-workers, yes. Why they do this? I don't know let alone do I care because I have my own drama to deal with in my personal life.

ISTJ, btw.


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## hellebore (Nov 30, 2014)

Oftentimes, but I assume it's because I look harmless.

I've become more receptive to it over the years just because I've started meeting more people who are actually friendly. I'd love to hear about super-dolphins like on a slow day like the guy @reveur met. There have been a few nice conversations with older gentlemen at some of the coffee shops I frequent and they outnumber the weirdos I meet in public. At the bus station a couple years ago there was a very, very drunk guy regaling everyone with tales of his blatantly made up adventures with famous people and gangs while we all pretended not to hear him. I considered telling him to go home before the snowstorm got bad (I'm not even sure he was going anywhere), but decided against it because I didn't want to get dragged into his... whatever he was doing.

Depending on the setting, though, it could still be pretty suspicious. Approaching me at the crosswalk is strange. Talking to me on the bus is not.

Probably pays to be cautious to an extent, though. There's a guy around here who offed his wife and was convicted for it. I didn't believe it at first because half the people in my family (who informed me) are paranoid, but I hunted down articles about his release online and it was the same guy I've seen in passing while visiting my brother's apartment. He doesn't really do anything, though. Just wanders around at odd hours and is awkwardly avoided by my mother.


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## QueenSuzanna (Dec 21, 2014)

This happens to me sometimes and I'm always super happy! People approaching me is exciting (｡´∀｀)ﾉ


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## Biracial (Sep 8, 2010)

Doesn't happen to me. I avoid it as much as possible. Hearing something disturbing overloads me. However, my intp Mother...people tell her all kinds of stuff. She's compassionate that's for sure.


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

Depends on the day and my demeanor. I think in general people stay back away from me as far as finding me hard to read as I seem serous yet still approachable a bit. 

Its more like some random person comes to fish and see what they can gather from an investigation by talking about random stuff about themselves. As far as like in a work setting or such. 

I do seem to attract a lot of elderly people even out and about like an elderly woman will randomly on many occasions just grab my hand and say something intriguing. Elderly men that come up and just say something like you look just like "so & so". I would say its a bit weird. I think I just maybe have a timeless look or demeanor tho that attracts elderly people to reminisce. 

So yeah seems like as far as random stranger its a lot of elderly people who comment, on my soul, or old soul, or something they see in my eyes, like eerie stuff. 

I don't attract people my age to me in general. (Well not like I repel them all either).


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## Nein (Oct 15, 2014)

In general, conversations only happen when I am the one to start them, but the content may drift to more sensitive matters later, and it is hardly my fault. I am known for being the best conversation killer in town, I can easily discontinue a conversation about pretty much anything and with anyone.

I hardly am approached by strangers, or acquaintances, or friends, or family members. When it does happen, it's usually some random religious person handing me a pamphlet and, when at a safe distance, assuring me that I am loved by Jesus. What I conclude from it, is that I don't look particularly amused most of the time. 

The exception is when people know that they have a good chance of seeing me everyday for awhile, for example, at work or some course. In such cases, a first conversation has included their sex life with general likes and dislikes, rape cases and so on, also medical conditions and family issues. I can't say I _react_ to this, and I've noticed their eyes seem to keep looking for outside help, as I stare at them. I tend to deal better with conversations that go towards more philosophical matters, since I usually dictate some solution when they are talking about a particular problem. I am still researching to make a user manual of how to react properly when people talk about personal issues. Suggestions welcome, by the way.


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## witchy_fingers (Dec 2, 2014)

Not often at all. The closest thing to this happening which I can recall is when one of my supervisors asked me if I believe in Big Foot or aliens visiting Earth. He and I rarely spoke, so I thought this was a slightly abrupt way of breaking the ice, but we wound up in a debate with one another. I also remember being approached by some foreign woman in a book store wanting to tell me about a famous Russian poet and why it is important for young generations to learn about him. I was polite and tried to seem fascinated, but wasn't. If somebody started spewing their personal problems at me, I can't say for certain what I would do. What I would _like_ to do is show no signs of interest to discourage them from speaking to me, but if they seemed to be in distress, I would probably try to advise and empathize with them. I can see myself being more curt with those I don't take seriously or who are not in their right mind. I don't want to waste my energy on people when there is that dense communication barrier. To answer your question more directly, I can force myself to be relatable and curious about others, but those kinds of situations are not the most comfortable for me.


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## Legate (Jan 7, 2015)

I can't stand it when people force themselves into my alone time by talking at me and never stopping. I can handle it if it's a friend that I know and like and have time to talk to, but I can't stand strangers, since I am very obviously the type of gal who is not brave enough to shut you down very loudly and publicly, and I will keep quiet and only barely engage them until they get the hint.

Strangers (especially male strangers who could physically overpower me) who won't just leave me the fuck alone no matter how hard I try to get them to go away are pretty much my worst nightmares. Like I've seriously had guys who'd hit on me on the bus and would keep going at it even as I'm very visibly trying to hold back tears because I'm so uncomfortable, and if we all get our own private Hell, then mine would be a bus ride with a guy who won't take a fucking hint and leave me alone no matter how many "leave me alone" vibes I put out, including the "leave me alone" vibe that is telling them point blank and in no uncertain terms to leave me alone.

So yeah, this happens to me a lot, no matter how much I hate it. It's probably because I'm a bit of a doormat and I'm very very good at pretending to listen, to the point where I can't exactly shut it off.


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## FourLeafCloafer (Aug 5, 2014)

I always like the conversations in the train with old people. I rarely text while using public transport, that helps. Only yesterday, I had a conversation with a guy about traveling and computers, it was fun.

Sadly, I also attract stoned people, which can be scary.


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## chanelle (Jan 12, 2015)

It's nice unless they look creepy


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