# Most and least friendly types?



## The Nameless Composer (Sep 20, 2014)

What are the most and least friendly MBTI types in your experience? How does INFP rank on the scale? Also their general sincerity? Are some types say, more outwardly friendly but inwardly more 'shallow', and vice versa?


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## alle123 (Nov 9, 2014)

I'm an ENFP and i think we are the most social and friendly i guess the least are tge the INTJ.... I guess they don't mean to be be not friendly but they prefer living in their own bubble...


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## Antipode (Jul 8, 2012)

I know everyone here plays the, "What do you mean by X," but it is usually warranted. 

It really depends on what you mean by friendly. ALL types are looking for human interactions, and for connections. No one wants to be alone and without "friends."

Now, the traditional image of friendly is outgoing and always engaging, in which case Fe users would typically be on top--if they all utilized that function correctly. 

But I don't anything is consciously thinking, "I'm not being friendly." They are just interacting the way they interact.


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## kannbrown (Oct 3, 2014)

I'm INTP and I don't know if you'd call me 'friendly' (though I can do mandatory socialization and look almost sincere at it...)


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## ALongTime (Apr 19, 2014)

Too many variables I think. Depends on what the individual values from a friend.

As for INFPs, we can take a while to warm up and aren't always the most open (true of me anyway), which may put some people off, but I like to think the upside is that we're usually sincere and devoted in the long run.


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## The Nameless Composer (Sep 20, 2014)

ALongTime said:


> Too many variables I think. Depends on what the individual values from a friend.
> 
> As for INFPs, we can take a while to warm up and aren't always the most open (true of me anyway), which may put some people off, but I like to think the upside is that we're usually sincere and devoted in the long run.


Yes, I agree. Although I think INFPs can actually be 'fake nice' too, so not as to hurt someone's feelings, while some other types might use it to gain something.


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## The Nameless Composer (Sep 20, 2014)

alle123 said:


> I'm an ENFP and i think we are the most social and friendly i guess the least are tge the INTJ.... I guess they don't mean to be be not friendly but they prefer living in their own bubble...


Would INFP possibly be the friendliest/most open introvert?


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## Catallena (Oct 19, 2014)

The Nameless Composer said:


> Would INFP possibly be the friendliest/most open introvert?


ISFJ is more likely because of high Fe and the consistency of Si

But friendliness doesn't have to associate with type. It has to do with you as a person not how your brain functions. :kitteh:


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## Aert (Jul 17, 2014)

Fe-doms for sure are friendly, and exfp are next up. It's really a matter of fe vs se vs ne, and I don't know enough to tell which would be considered the 'friendliest' function. Friendly as in warm? Or just being really talkative to everyone? For warmness it'd be fe, and pikachu-ness would be se or ne.

Least friendly would be a fe-inferior or introverted fi user (ixfp or ixtj). Let me explain fi first: fi-dom types naturally are more sensitive than others and are 'hurt' more deeply and don't want to show that. They shy away to avoid being upset. When they talk they tend to appear aloof and even rude. The feeling is introverted and not visible to untrusted people. 
Ixtj: they are introverted, and their feeling is introverted. They don't give a toss if you don't like them...they just want to be left alone at parties, but are friendly to their friends. They are not friendly for the sake of being friendly, but only when someone has their respect.
Fe-inferior...fe is about making people feel included and helping them...and when it's your least developed function (exclude shadows), you won't naturally be great at connecting with people. 

Of course, their are exceptions to every rule, and i wouldnt be surprised to see an intp out-host an esfj at their own gathering. However, I've never seen that happen...oh well. Go intps?


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## The Nameless Composer (Sep 20, 2014)

Aert said:


> Fe-doms for sure are friendly, and exfp are next up. It's really a matter of fe vs se vs ne, and I don't know enough to tell which would be considered the 'friendliest' function. Friendly as in warm? Or just being really talkative to everyone? For warmness it'd be fe, and pikachu-ness would be se or ne.
> 
> Least friendly would be a fe-inferior or introverted fi user (ixfp or ixtj). Let me explain fi first: fi-dom types naturally are more sensitive than others and are 'hurt' more deeply and don't want to show that. They shy away to avoid being upset. When they talk they tend to appear aloof and even rude. The feeling is introverted and not visible to untrusted people.
> Ixtj: they are introverted, and their feeling is introverted. They don't give a toss if you don't like them...they just want to be left alone at parties, but are friendly to their friends. They are not friendly for the sake of being friendly, but only when someone has their respect.
> ...


I'm INFP. I have been accused of seeming a bit aloof, but it depends on my mood. Sometimes I can be friendly, saying hi to strangers, that sort of thing, and try to be bubbly to the person working at the check out or whatever. I think I come across as friendly and approachable, yet have never one to be into fake niceness or being overly sugary. 

I suppose a bit of both. Warmth doesn't always correlate to talking a lot, but it often correlates to a willingness to connect.


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## ALongTime (Apr 19, 2014)

The Nameless Composer said:


> Yes, I agree. Although I think INFPs can actually be 'fake nice' too, so not as to hurt someone's feelings, while some other types might use it to gain something.


Hmm, I can't really identify with that, sorry. It would only occur at times when the other person is really likely to be hurt and I cared about them, but people I don't like I really don't have time for to be honest and I have no inclination to let them think otherwise.



The Nameless Composer said:


> Would INFP possibly be the friendliest/most open introvert?


Interesting, I've often thought of INFPs as (externally) the coldest of all the feeling types, given the difficulty to open up, and a lot of us a pretty shy (but not all). It probably depends on the individual, but there seems to be quite a wide gap in energy levels between some INFPs and ENFPs.


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## ALongTime (Apr 19, 2014)

The Nameless Composer said:


> I'm INFP. I have been accused of seeming a bit aloof, but it depends on my mood. Sometimes I can be friendly, saying hi to strangers, that sort of thing, and try to be bubbly to the person working at the check out or whatever. I think I come across as friendly and approachable, yet have never one to be into fake niceness or being overly sugary.
> 
> I suppose a bit of both. Warmth doesn't always correlate to talking a lot, but it often correlates to a willingness to connect.


Particularly like the last sentence there, you don't have to be an extrovert to be just as friendly. Being someone who listens, that people can open up to is a positive quality to have.

The word 'aloof' seems to just be a really negative word for an introvert.


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## The Nameless Composer (Sep 20, 2014)

ALongTime said:


> Hmm, I can't really identify with that, sorry. It would only occur at times when the other person is really likely to be hurt and I cared about them, but people I don't like I really don't have time for to be honest and I have no inclination to let them think otherwise.
> 
> 
> Interesting, I've often thought of INFPs as (externally) the coldest of all the feeling types, given the difficulty to open up, and a lot of us a pretty shy (but not all). It probably depends on the individual, but there seems to be quite a wide gap in energy levels between some INFPs and ENFPs.


Maybe it's because I'm basing it on online interactions where people open up. IRL, I couldn't say with confidence whether someone is INFP. I have one real life friend who did test INFP and yes, she can come across as aloof at first (my sister felt she was) but online she is very understanding and empathetic. She's not the type to take initiative a lot, though. I do have a few INFP friends online who would seem unapproachable though.

Interesting. Yeah like I said, with me it depends on my mood. I think when I'm happy I'm usually quite happy-go-lucky. When I'm depressed/anxious/stressed (which is a lot of the time) I just want to withdraw.


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## The Nameless Composer (Sep 20, 2014)

ALongTime said:


> Particularly like the last sentence there, you don't have to be an extrovert to be just as friendly. Being someone who listens, that people can open up to is a positive quality to have.
> 
> The word 'aloof' seems to just be a really negative word for an introvert.


Yes, exactly. You get a better idea how genuinely friendly/nice someone is the longer you spend with them. Also when they're 'tested'. 

People say I'm a good listener and they feel comfortable opening up to me. I come across as very non-threatening.


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## VinnieBob (Mar 24, 2014)

being INTJ I speak from experience
I'm the least friendliest person, I don't enjoy meeting new people
when approached by a stranger I refuse eye contact and ignore them
I can talk to a unknown when attending a social function but only briefly


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## Pearl Parker (Sep 2, 2014)

If we're talking stereotypes then:

ESFJ -''Most friendly'' 
INTJ -''Least friendly''

I don't believe types can be sorted into those categories. I'm friendly in the casual sense, but on the inside I'm not interested in what other people have to say. I'm really not. I can't be bothered. Maybe that's Fi, maybe it isn't and I'm just a bitch. Either way it's whatever. It all comes down to perspectives really. You can act extroverted and put on an Fe mask and people would think you're friendly even though you could be making rude remarks about them to yourself. Similarly, you could appear self absorbed/indifferent but want to engage with others and make them happy -Though, because you'd look unfriendly, people would avoid you.


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## aendern (Dec 28, 2013)

Pearl Parker said:


> INTJ -''Least friendly''


I think many people in my day-to-day life perceive me as arrogant and aloof.

And they are totally right, I am those things. But I'm also really friendly if they would just take the chance to initiate conversation with me, they would see that D:

Not friendly in the Fe sense, though, to tie in to what Antipode said. It's just like ebullience that someone finally talked to me XD. I'm never openly-judgemental of people to their face. I very rarely say anything negative about anyone (other than myself. I've found self-effacing humor to be very beneficial in recent years. I think it helps to tear down that massive wall I put up that scares people away).

I've actually felt really extraverted recently... (extraverted for me, not extraverted in general)


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## annikafrom (Nov 21, 2014)

In my experience INFP's do tend to be fairly friendly and extroverted compared to other introverts. I'd say that ESFJ's and ENFJ's tend to be the friendliest


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## PPM (Apr 7, 2013)

Fe doms have been friendliest in my experience.

I would guess that xxTPs are most likely to be outwardly friendly but not really 'mean' it in the Fi sense.

I just do what I feel is appropriate for the situation…provided I have the energy. I think my interactions are so instinctual/culturally conditioned that it's not like I plan ahead to act differently from how I actually feel or be deceptive. In certain situations I sort of go on Fe autopilot and surprise myself that I’m being friendlier than some of my IxFP friends.

Having meaningful friendships are different from being friendly though. Perhaps Fi users are better at that, I don’t know.


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## jcal (Oct 31, 2013)

Aert said:


> Ixtj: they are introverted, and their feeling is introverted. They don't give a toss if you don't like them...they just want to be left alone at parties, but are friendly to their friends. They are not friendly for the sake of being friendly, but only when someone has their respect.


This is quite accurate from my perspective. 

Just to clarify the "They don't give a toss if you don't like them" part... While not untrue, it's not something anyone should take as a personal statement against them. We just don't care very much about what folks that are outside of our inner circle do or think. It just doesn't register with us. On the other hand, if someone "on the inside" (that has earned our trust, respect and loyalty) should indicate that they don't like something we did or said, we take that VERY seriously, and it can hurt us a great deal.

In general, we make a much bigger distinction between friends and acquaintances than some other types might do. We can be cordial and function professionally and socially with acquaintances, but generally don't give them a moment's thought once the immediate interaction is over. Those very few that we consider true friends (including loved ones) occupy much more of our thoughts, see much more of our soft inner core, and get to experience the love, respect and loyalty that we reserve for those who are truly special to us.


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## atenea (Sep 14, 2014)

ALongTime said:


> Hmm, I can't really identify with that, sorry. It would only occur at times when the other person is really likely to be hurt and I cared about them, but *people I don't like I really don't have time for to be honest and I have no inclination to let them think otherwise.*


Neither do I. When I'm friendly to someone it's authentic, almost always (there are exceptions)



annikafrom said:


> In my experience INFP's do tend to be fairly friendly and extroverted compared to other introverts.


I don't know about other INFP's but that's not true for me, I'm quite introverted, and not very friendly in the sense of talking and smiling a lot, it takes some time for me to open up. Introversion is my strongest preference. I'm type 5 in the Enneagram, I think Type 9 INFP's seem probably quite extroverted and friendly for an introverted type (also types 2 and 6, not so much types 4 and 5).


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## EonsInTheNight (Oct 26, 2014)

ENFJ from IRL examples


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## ccama16 (Aug 10, 2014)

Entp here very friendly but sometimes rub people the wrong way. I figure if im friendly to everyone i can get favors from them and they become much easier to lead.


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## dreamsofsilence (Sep 17, 2020)

I would say intj and intp will have a hard time and out of all the intuitive types, enfps have the most friends and infps can be friendly as well so they won’t have too hard of a time.


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