# Is face to face irl interaction required for dualization to occur?



## Gentleman (Jun 14, 2014)

I read that dualization can't occur over the internet because there are too many crucial subconscious aspects of it that go on in the background, such as body language and pheromones. You can have lovely conversations with your dual, but you aren't predisposed to feel that there's anything special about them (unless you understand socionics and you go in with a "soulmate" attitude beforehand) because those things can't happen. You're more likely to hit it off with your identical, extinguishment, or mirage than you are your dual when communicating through text. You can't get a feel for your dual's energy level, or develop a sense of endearment by observing them use their base function in their environment. Is this true, or can dualization occur over the internet just fine?


----------



## Zero11 (Feb 7, 2010)

Its true. Although Inormation exchange also happens very fast (efficient) over the Internet.


----------



## Word Dispenser (May 18, 2012)

I'd agree. People simply _aren't _the same face-to-face. _Even _taking video into account. You need the whole picture to really experience that dualization.


----------



## AmandaLee (Aug 13, 2014)

I definitely think you need to interact with someone IRL for duality to occur. 

I'll use myself as an example. I'm a LII whose dual would be an ESE. Their two top functions are my "weak and valued" super-id functions. I'm somewhat lacking in emotional energy and sometimes (often!) have trouble attending to my own bodily needs and comforts. Supposedly my appreciation for my dual would spring from their proficiency in these areas; i.e. interactive action on their part to foster an environment where I, with my 1D baby Fe, can feel included and let loose, and by creating a comfortable, cozy, relaxed atmosphere filled with positive sensory experiences that my DS Si could never accomplish on its own. 

I, in turn, would stimulate the ESE's underdeveloped Ti by helping them organize their understanding of things into structured thought and help them evaluate impersonal information. 

Seeing as most of the dual-bonding would require direct action rather than just an exchange of information through a computer screen, yes, I do think IRL interaction is required for duality to occur.


----------



## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

I think there is truth to it. In my experience, being in a LDR with my dual, with most interactions being online just isn't the same as being together in person. The few times we have been together physically I felt like a lot more happened _very _quickly. And once you experience that it's very hard to go back to how things were before without feeling like you're missing out. Frustrating. :frustrating:


----------



## Entropic (Jun 15, 2012)

Kintsugi said:


> I think there is truth to it. In my experience, being in a LDR with my dual, with most interactions being online just isn't the same as being together in person. The few times we have been together physically I felt like a lot more happened _very _quickly. And once you experience that it's very hard to go back to how things were before without feeling like you're missing out. Frustrating. :frustrating:


Agreed, but to say it is _not_ possible I call BS on, for the very reason that I know it's possible because I've doing it. It may go slower but it's not impossible, no.


----------



## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

Entropic said:


> Agreed, but to say it is _not_ possible I call BS on, for the very reason that I know it's possible because I've doing it. It may go slower but it's not impossible, no.


Oh yeah, it's definitely possible. I'm kind of at the stage now where I feel that I _need _to be with him. Progression has slowed down significantly and I feel like we are reaching a stage where things need to be taken to the next level. Or maybe I'm just impatient.


----------



## Word Dispenser (May 18, 2012)

Entropic said:


> Agreed, but to say it is _not_ possible I call BS on, for the very reason that I know it's possible because I've doing it. It may go slower but it's not impossible, no.


I just don't think that _complete _dualization is really possible online. I'm sure you can experience it partially. You just can't expect to get a whole picture.


----------



## -Alpha- (Dec 30, 2013)

In my experience, I'd say it's possibile for it to occur in either context as I don't understand why physical presence is a necessity to enjoy the way others express their judgments and understand the world around them. The fact that we can communicate meaningfully in text means that some part of the way the other person expresses their thoughts is capable of resonating with us through such a medium. I don't see what physical connection really has to do with it outside of the natural enjoyment of animal warmth from other people.

This evidence might be somewhat anecdotal, but @Amaterasu, for instance reports a very positive relationship with people that are her dual. I'd say her and @Entropic or even myself are a decent example of duality occurring.


----------



## Word Dispenser (May 18, 2012)

-Alpha- said:


> In my experience, I'd say it's possibile for it to occur in either context as I don't understand why physical presence is a necessity to enjoy the way others express their judgments and understand the world around them. The fact that we can communicate meaningfully in text means that some part of the way the other person expresses their thoughts is capable of resonating with us through such a medium. I don't see what physical connection really has to do with it outside of the natural enjoyment of animal warmth from other people.
> 
> This evidence might be somewhat anecdotal, but @_Amaterasu_, for instance reports a very positive relationship with people that are her dual. I'd say her and @_Entropic_ or even myself are a decent example of duality occurring.


I think you would understand if you met someone that you knew on the internet for many years.

It's simply not the same.

It's more than just physical presence. It's eye contact. It's vocal recognition. Even the way they speak is far different than how they come across in text. Tonal variance. Expressions. Passion. Body language, yes, definitely. Everything plays a small part.

This is why I maintain that you can only experience a partial duality through internet means.


----------



## cyamitide (Jul 8, 2010)

I think it does happen online. I've gotten into small arguments with my duals online that felt transformative. But it's incomplete dualization imo as @Word Dispenser has mentioned.


----------



## ai.tran.75 (Feb 26, 2014)

Hmmm Most likely but I'm unsure - not that I'm with my dual partner . But my istp and I are horrible at online or texting communication - in fact if we ever argue it's through texting ( never on phone or real life and it's been over 9 years ). And I have connected with certain friends online but not at all in person . However, I've had friends who hooked up online and are married - one of my friend met his gf in 7th grade through gaming and they carry on a long distance (web cam) relationship till sophomore year of high school (where she flew to visit him) they got engaged after graduating college and are now married


----------



## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

-Alpha- said:


> In my experience, I'd say it's possibile for it to occur in either context as I don't understand why physical presence is a necessity to enjoy the way others express their judgments and understand the world around them. The fact that we can communicate meaningfully in text means that some part of the way the other person expresses their thoughts is capable of resonating with us through such a medium. I don't see what physical connection really has to do with it outside of the natural enjoyment of animal warmth from other people.


There is a physical aspect to it though. Try spending large amounts of time, intimately, with a dual and you'll see what I mean. I'm not talking about sex either. 

Sometimes I feel like it's harder to fully express Se online, so much gets lost in translation. It's harder to energize an Ni-dom through text than it is in person. 



Word Dispenser said:


> I think you would understand if you met someone that you knew on the internet for many years.
> 
> It's simply not the same.
> 
> ...


I completely agree with this.


----------



## Pancreatic Pandora (Aug 16, 2013)

ai.tran.75 said:


> Hmmm Most likely but I'm unsure - not that I'm with my dual partner . But my istp and I are horrible at online or texting communication - in fact if we ever argue it's through texting ( never on phone or real life and it's been over 9 years ). And I have connected with certain friends online but not at all in person . However, I've had friends who hooked up online and are married - one of my friend met his gf in 7th grade through gaming and they carry on a long distance (web cam) relationship till sophomore year of high school (where she flew to visit him) they got engaged after graduating college and are now married


I've had the same experience with my SEE bf >_<. Best compatibility I've ever known when living together but somehow it's easy to misunderstand each other and argue through text? Idk, it just seems to vary depending on the person and the relationship.

I think this discussion is touching more on the question of how well do long-distance relationships work because I don't think this is merely a matter of dualization, especially because dualization isn't anything other than a term for the effects a particular type of socionics relation has on an individual, however, _all_ socionics relations and _all human_ relations have an effect on our psychology (I don't think this needs an explanation). And, due to that fact, I'm not inclined to think duality is anything especial in that sense. Instead, I think *for me *any interaction is different, usually better, in person than through text. But I also think some people may have different needs in their relationships and it might not be the same for them.


----------



## Kintsugi (May 17, 2011)

You need touch, baby.
That's what it's all about. :kitteh:


----------



## yentipeee (Jun 19, 2013)

I've never "dualized" with anyone  Am I missing something major here?


----------

