# I have a problem getting around to and completing tasks.



## unINFalliPle (Jul 8, 2012)

Especially those that involve something from me, more personal. 

I'm not a lazy schmo. I can be useful, responsible, neat. I wash my own clothes, cook my own food, can do tasks for other people. Why is it that when it comes down to me doing something that means something to me, or is supposed to, I come out at a dead end?

I'm trying to analyze this here. Because I've had enough of slacking off. Because, the reality is I don't slack off. I think of my project, I prepare for it, I read about it, I analyze it, I check similar works, when it comes down to me doing it, completing it, it often fails. So I come across as a slacker. 

I'm determined, I persevere, I can adapt. I can handle failure. 

I'm wondering if I put myself on a pedestal? Oh, you can do so many things and they'll be amazing. Do I get overwhelmed? Perfectionism? Oh, this has to be so great and because I don't think it's turning out that way or the pressure of it being so great is too much for me to handle, I'm just neglecting it. I like imperfection. I am not organized. I wonder if I like imperfection so much because even close to perfect means failure. I feel like I have this fear, like something's holding me back. I don't think I'm scared to fail. In fact, I so often leave things to the last minute or I challenge myself. And why? Why can't I just have proper time management and do things regularly. I get so close to the possibility of failure like an adrenaline rush. I skim cars on the road. Not purposely, it's the way I drive. XD Like, as I'm exiting a parking, I get closer than is usual, apparently. It's like I like being near something that can be wrong. Why can't I just stem away from this close to accidental event and just steer onto a clear road? Get shit done. 

Let me tell you, am I tired of this. Reach my potential. What is it? Why do I have such difficulty in accomplishing things? It's hard for me to get by. 

I used to be a top student (well, not really, but above average, heh. I was somewhat of teacher's pet at one point. And a goodie goodie. :/ I have pictures of me in that phase extending my dress like a lady with this big smile on my face. Egh. Now, it's like I'm the opposite. Like I'm a rebel. Maybe things stopped mattering.) and top soccer player (I was. Capitano at one point. Tomboy phase too.) I feel like when I had to be more adult is when I started having this problem. Stopped caring about being above average, I guess. Do I have this fear of making my place in the world? Why would I? Is this a thing of expectation, from me, from others? I don't think I have low self esteem. It just seems hard for me to really try as much as I know that I'm able to, and it's kind of sad. I used to be hard on myself. I don't think I am anymore. Am I not caring enough, am I caring too much? 

I just want to stop thinking and start doing but something seems to be holding me back, so I want to understand. Thank you for reading or any input/your own situation.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

Stop everything you're doing and force yourself to just start it. For just 5 minutes, do whatever it is. Starting is usually the hardest part. If you can continue longer then 5 minutes, great, and if not then you already started and can do another 5 the next day. But don't forget to start every day on a new part. Chances are that on one of those day's you'll just keep going.


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## unINFalliPle (Jul 8, 2012)

ISFjosue0098 said:


> Stop everything you're doing and force yourself to just start it. For just 5 minutes, do whatever it is. Starting is usually the hardest part. If you can continue longer then 5 minutes, great, and if not then you already started and can do another 5 the next day. But don't forget to start every day on a new part. Chances are that on one of those day's you'll just keep going.


I guess so. But I don't allow myself enough time. That actually helps though. 

My post was long and whiny, sorry. 

I've already went through this before and I thought I was done with it.


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## Death Persuades (Feb 17, 2012)

unINFalliPle said:


> I guess so. But I don't allow myself enough time. That actually helps though.
> 
> My post was long and whiny, sorry.
> 
> I've already went through this before and I thought I was done with it.


I find that turning everything off helps. Computer, music, cell phone... Everything. And just start it. Even if you actually only do five minutes. Now I've gotten to the point where I can just start even with distractions and I can go on til I finish. Took me like a month to get into that habit though :/


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## Panoramiq (Aug 15, 2012)

unINFalliPle said:


> "I'm determined, I persevere, I can adapt. I can handle failure."


 -- this is the seat of your misery. 

If you were to take a breath, you will see that whatever _happens_ is completely unnecessary as far as you should be concerned. If your only concern is for what's happening now, which there is no story, all of your worry and anxiety would be gone. You can only ever do what's here, now. If you're making a story about your current life situation, you're immediately going back into mind emphasized time -past, future, and away from the timeless space of presence. It's the difference between life and life situation, one is never fulfilled and always some level of fear, drama, the other complete unto itself.

You're so concerned about your conceptual reality, that you miss what's real, what's reality. This conceptual reality is continually eating up all of your attention, you're worrying about your "life", which isn't life at all. 

"It's a dreadful fate for a person to be consumed by their life situation. And so they miss life. They're trying to find their life, the fullness of life, in their life situation, and they're hoping that they can eventually sort out their life situation so that they can find life. But if your life situation is all you have, you're never going to find life, because your life situation is a set of thoughts and concepts in your head!"


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## unINFalliPle (Jul 8, 2012)

Panoramiq said:


> -- this is the seat of your misery.
> 
> If you were to take a breath, you will see that whatever _happens_ is completely unnecessary as far as you should be concerned. If your only concern is for what's happening now, which there is no story, all of your worry and anxiety would be gone. You can only ever do what's here, now. If you're making a story about your current life situation, you're immediately going back into mind emphasized time -past, future, and away from the timeless space of presence. It's the difference between life and life situation, one is never fulfilled and always some level of fear, drama, the other complete unto itself.
> 
> You're so concerned about your conceptual reality, that you miss what's real, what's reality.


I see. I got something out of it, not sure it's what you were saying, but I did.

How is that the seat of my misery?


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## Panoramiq (Aug 15, 2012)

I added some more bits..


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## unINFalliPle (Jul 8, 2012)

Panoramiq said:


> I added some more bits..


Ah yes. I have been stuck in my head before. :tongue:


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## All in Twilight (Oct 12, 2012)

It's your seat of misery because _you are not present._ "I'm determined, I persevere, I can adapt. I can handle failure" this is all about action and related to what was and what will possibly be (conceptual reality). The key to success lies in _non-action_ and understanding this very moment.

Just be lazy and do nothing and let things come to you naturally by choosing our actions wisely. You can only act wisely if you understand this very moment. Everything will be accomplished if you understand this very moment. I think you should give the words of @Panoramiq some more thought. Maybe you should even write them down and look at them every morning, ponder about it and let go of it. He provided you with a lot of information of which most of it is hidden.

But fear and anxiety, stress, suffering and so on comes into existence when we are not in the now/present and don't understand the now/present. Just be, do your thing, share some stuff and move on again.


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## unINFalliPle (Jul 8, 2012)

All in Twilight said:


> It's your seat of misery because _you are not present._ "I'm determined, I persevere, I can adapt. I can handle failure" this is all about action and related to what was and what will possibly be (conceptual reality). The key to success lies in _non-action_ and understanding this very moment.
> 
> Just be lazy and do nothing and let things come to you naturally by choosing our actions wisely. You can only act wisely if you understand this very moment. Everything will be accomplished if you understand this very moment. I think you should give the words of @_Panoramiq_ some more thought. Maybe you should even write them down and look at them every morning, ponder about it and let go of it. He provided you with a lot of information of which most of it is hidden.
> 
> But fear and anxiety, stress, suffering and so on comes into existence when we are not in the now/present and don't understand the now/present. Just be, do your thing, share some stuff and move on again.


I agree. *Panoramiq* said some great things. You too. Thanks guys. <3

Why am I not present?


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## Panoramiq (Aug 15, 2012)

unINFalliPle said:


> Why am I not present?


Because presence is not what you _think _it is.


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## unINFalliPle (Jul 8, 2012)

Panoramiq said:


> Because presence is not what you _think _it is.


It's being. I'm being right now.


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## Panoramiq (Aug 15, 2012)

Hold that beingness, and relax into it. This is what it means to surrender to what _is_. This _isness_ of life.


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## mushr00m (May 23, 2011)

Hide all distractions.


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## unINFalliPle (Jul 8, 2012)

Taking Breaks Can Help You Get More Done | Live

I like a bit of distraction or breaks in between. I can't be too focused on something over a long period of time.


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