# How do you ''hook'' someone?



## Eu_citzen (Jan 18, 2018)

Different people see different qualities as redeeming or "standing out". As such, the whole idea of "hooking" someone seems off to me. Since it often seems to imply that you have to be special, do special things, and impress them to no end.
Yeah, nah, that sounds boring. Just have fun and given time someone will find your qualities to "stand out" and you'll be spared of excessive peacocking.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

mia-me said:


> That's fair, albeit the current version of 'use' in the manosphere is that women must return sex for attention or guys are being used. This gets my back up since that's prostitution in a different currency since it denies any effort put in by women and any pleasure in their exchanges by men.


Not everyone uses manosphere vocabulary.


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

DOGSOUP said:


> Not everyone uses manosphere vocabulary.


Of course not but it's commonly used on PerC.


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## Squirt (Jun 2, 2017)

mia-me said:


> Of course not but it's commonly used on PerC.


So let’s not feed into it.


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## Ssenptni (Mar 26, 2021)

Your question is, how do I become a better hooker?


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## Glittris (May 15, 2020)

I do not even bother with that, I am just here to be myself...

Sometimes, not even giving a look, can inadvertently give some attention..., I am not interested in you... What, come on, leave me be!?..., I could give you a shit test though..., since you are spicy enough to appear on my radar in the first place... ^^;

Ok, you gave up? Better luck elsewhere, pretty soldier...

I do not hook people, others do hook me, preferably cool tomboys... , actually, I am not interested in any of you at all..., since I already can analyze the hell through your behavior before you even hit the bar!...

Hah, take that as a yet another "thrown gauntlet" from me... _thee-he-he_ ^^


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

Squirt said:


> So let’s not feed into it.


It's a long held belief in masculine gender role advocates of the past and present. Prostitution using a non-monetary currency.


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## BenevolentBitterBleeding (Mar 16, 2015)

Ssenptni said:


> Your question is, how do I become a better hooker?


You... you're not wrong.


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## Joe Black (Apr 1, 2015)

Ssenptni said:


> Your question is, how do I become a better hooker?


Thank you. Was waiting for this pun.


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## pwowq (Aug 7, 2016)

Tell them what you want and hope they'll agree. 

That's my hook.


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## Stevester (Feb 28, 2016)

We've been texting back and forth all week but they only reply when I text first, so now I'm trying the ''Wait 'til they come to you first'' strategy.

I'm still waiting for a reply 48 in now... :'(


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## Fru2 (Aug 21, 2018)

Stevester said:


> We've been texting back and forth all week but they only reply when I text first, so now I'm trying the ''Wait 'til they come to you first'' strategy.
> 
> I'm still waiting for a reply 48 in now... :'(


They might just think you're busy and aren't the type to initiate, some people even feel like they're too bothersome/too clingy if they initiate, at least at first.

I don't think this response is too telling of anything, so if you're not too bothered with taking the proactive route I suggest you continue to initiate and get a bit closer. You might be worried about the relationshi being too one-sided, but other things will be much better markers for that imo.


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## Stevester (Feb 28, 2016)

Fru2 said:


> They might just think you're busy and aren't the type to initiate, some people even feel like they're too bothersome/too clingy if they initiate, at least at first.


The irony being that this is exactly why I stopped texting :/


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

I don't, lol


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## Joe Black (Apr 1, 2015)

Stevester said:


> This is the stage I always struggle with in a romantic relationship as well as just platonic ones. You got someone you really like to acknowledge your existence, you have friendly discussions, sometimes casual get togethers etc. But then it hits you that you're really just one of their many acquaintances and you have no idea how to stand out from the rest of the pack and go up their priority list. Then of course this fear that if you don't come up with something that makes special quick, you're quickly gonna fall off their radar.
> 
> 
> Tips?


Usually being a bit humourous, charming and charismatic is the universal “hook” (in a way that you’re enjoying yourself instead of forcing it). Being enjoyable to be around. How are you at it?


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## UpClosePersonal (Apr 18, 2014)

Single women are always open to meeting someone. In my lifetime, I never reached out to hook someone. I just had to display my intelligence, sense of humor and openness and that was enough to attract many women (in the workplace).
It helps to be good looking but good looking people smile and light up around other people and that's what makes them attractive.

If you don't have some version of an outgoing personality, you cannot attract people to you, generally.


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## Inveniet (Aug 21, 2009)

Ssenptni said:


> Your question is, how do I become a better hooker?


Question then is, who is the hooker?
Who bites on who's hook?

It may be that trying to craft a hook, you have already been hooked!


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## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

When i REALLY want to be friends with someone, I tend to just be myself.... So bring up weird ass shit that I don't notice is weird at the time: Humboldt squid facts, sharing whatever my hyper fixation is at the time, asking a billion invasive questions ranging from needing to know their toothpaste, favorite dinosaur, hobbies and interests, monologuing about various things that the person probably doesn't give a shit about, asking them to go places with me, or to do a hobby together. 


I can both say: 

1.) I do not recommend this method, and I very much wish I could actually have some shred of social competency. 

2.) It has admittedly worked far more often than it has any right to.


Unfortunately, apparently, narcissists do use similar looking methods to my and my ADHD brethren, so be careful out there:


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

My preference is to use circle hooks because they're easy to remove and don't do much damage. Barbed hooks are barbaric.


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

I don’t try to hook em. I mean if it’s not a mutual conversation going back and forth more effortless.

Ive found it’s not worth pushing the effort if it’s not coming naturally. 🤷🏻‍♀️.


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