# How long has it been since you got laid?



## FaeSoleil (9 mo ago)

Purrfessor said:


> If you want to help I would suggest sharing with them things that are balanced. God hates it, but being lukewarm is really an awesome feeling. Not too hot not too cold. Just... enjoyable. Toxicity is rooted in duality and this mbti stuff is too. You have to make middle ground. Meet them at center. Not heaven nor hell. Just life and love.
> 
> That's what I'm trying to work on but life is really pushing me hard. Not the lucky type.


... my feelings on duality are complicated. When it comes down to it, I certainly don't for a moment believe a consistent middle ground is any better than any extreme. To be inconsistent creates its own problems. It might solve one person's problems, but it's no silver bullet.

IMO, It's about seeing that there are other ways that are just as good and bright, not necessarily having to pick a middle path for yourself. That's just as restrictive.


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## Purrfessor (Jul 30, 2013)

FaeSoleil said:


> ... my feelings on duality are complicated. When it comes down to it, I certainly don't for a moment believe a consistent middle ground is any better than any extreme. To be inconsistent creates its own problems. It might solve one person's problems, but it's no silver bullet.
> 
> IMO, It's about seeing that there are other ways that are just as good and bright, not necessarily having to pick a middle path for yourself. That's just as restrictive.


That's an interesting perspective. I know I try really hard to find that middle path because one extreme or another means that something is wrong and needs a solution. If you stick to the middle path then nothings wrong and you don't need a solution. But with that said I do find it difficult to maintain for longer periods. It seems there are patterns that flow up and down left and right which propel you in new directions with new people. This is necessary mainly because the middle path is not common, so you don't fit in easily if you choose it. Thats my problem I'm an outcast.


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## FaeSoleil (9 mo ago)

Purrfessor said:


> That's an interesting perspective. I know I try really hard to find that middle path because one extreme or another means that something is wrong and needs a solution. If you stick to the middle path then nothings wrong and you don't need a solution. But with that said I do find it difficult to maintain for longer periods. It seems there are patterns that flow up and down left and right which propel you in new directions with new people. This is necessary mainly because the middle path is not common, so you don't fit in easily if you choose it. Thats my problem I'm an outcast.


Mmm... "Nothing wrong" also comes with "nothing right". It's probably true that you're safe from any excesses of any given other direction you can take, but it also means you don't have a chance to truly _shine_ in the way only more extreme personalities or approaches can accomplish, at risk of said excesses. I don't think it's a wrong choice, but, even beyond any of how other people react, it... has its inherent downsides.


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## Purrfessor (Jul 30, 2013)

FaeSoleil said:


> Mmm... "Nothing wrong" also comes with "nothing right". It's probably true that you're safe from any excesses of any given other direction you can take, but it also means you don't have a chance to truly _shine_ in the way only more extreme personalities or approaches can accomplish, at risk of said excesses. I don't think it's a wrong choice, but, even beyond any of how other people react, it... has its inherent downsides.


Yeah it's not a perfect approach but it prevents extreme behaviors such as suicide, homicide, car crashes, and so on. It's like being traffic director. It establishes rules such as law and it can enable totalitarian regime. It's necessary to prevent disaster. 

The other option is everybody right. That doesn't bring good enough chemistry to cook. Without cooking there's no eating. Without eating there's no working. Without work there's no necessities. 

Everybody left is just a party. It'll create a dumpster fire. 

Left and right is world War 3.

You know what I mean? What's the best path forward? Each solution is flawed. 

Only ONE solution without a flaw. The natural approach. But the weak will perish.


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## gravityfalls (Jan 1, 2021)

Never had sex, but I had random sex dreams, haha.


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## oldsinner123 (8 mo ago)

7 year's. after daughters death in 2015, wife and I health went down hill.


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## FaeSoleil (9 mo ago)

Purrfessor said:


> Yeah it's not a perfect approach but it prevents extreme behaviors such as suicide, homicide, car crashes, and so on. It's like being traffic director. It establishes rules such as law and it can enable totalitarian regime. It's necessary to prevent disaster.
> 
> The other option is everybody right. That doesn't bring good enough chemistry to cook. Without cooking there's no eating. Without eating there's no working. Without work there's no necessities.
> 
> ...


... and yet the stars will shine. And yet, people will have their wills. And yet, people will be flawed, and they will act on those flaws. Just as you do. People suffer when they aren't allowed to express their natural natures, and _will_ lash out. Try to prevent extreme behaviors like suicide, by creating the circumstances that drive people to that point. What a joke...

That you consider yourself in the middle of the dichotomies you see, doesn't mean there aren't others you don't. Dichotomies are lies. You can always define one in which someone perfectly in the middle by some other definition is extreme.

Zero solutions without a flaw. You aren't different. Conflict is our fate. May as well as make something beautiful out of it.


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## Crowbo (Jul 9, 2017)

Never. Lmao


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## eeo (Aug 25, 2020)

A while.


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

The last time I tried to go without sex, I lasted 3 months before I started losing my mind. I would look up at the sky and the clouds would look like a fine ass woman. I think taking a break can be good since it resets your appreciation for sex.

To be fair to myself, I was in my late teens when I tried that. I'm sure I could last a lot longer if I tried it now.


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## Mark R (Dec 23, 2015)

It's been about three months for me. I'm in a LDR.


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## LiarPrince (Jul 10, 2021)

WhiteCrow11 said:


> Anybody who can top fifteen (15) years?


18, lol


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## LiarPrince (Jul 10, 2021)

Purrfessor said:


> Well it could be about virginity. Sex changes your mentality. You may not be satisfied with just foreplay anymore. It may also increase your propensity to adhere to gender norms to attract mates. I'm a virgin and I have to say if I lost my virginity I'd try to be more masculine. Currently I embrace masculine and feminine sides of myself because the human body has both elements to it. However I do get led to more masculine endeavors because I happen to struggle with being too weak to function and so I fight myself in order to man up.
> 
> Still I find being a virgin difficult as a man at my age.


I'm sorry, are you retarded?


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## Purrfessor (Jul 30, 2013)

LiarPrince said:


> I'm sorry, are you retarded?


Are you incapable of understanding words?


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## LiarPrince (Jul 10, 2021)

Purrfessor said:


> Are you incapable of understanding words?


Yes sorry 😞


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## Ssenptni (Mar 26, 2021)

Customarily, somewhat less long.


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## Llyralen (Sep 4, 2017)

Sooo… I usually have life a bit too good in this area. My husband and I struck it lucky. We were both virgins when we got married and from the wedding day on, I adore sex. I love how alive and powerful and cherished I feel and how connected and how much fun I think it all is with him. So… 2 months ago my husband’s mom died and we’ve… it’s now been 2 1/2 weeks and I usually start complaining and feeling neglected and impatient like a spoiled brat if we miss a week and….I bet you all are shaking your heads….and I know what I’ve got is not fair. But I guess I want people to know that this can be a really meaningful great part of life for some of us. My husband and I have been together for 18 years and I hope I die first. I don’t want to be without him.

Yeah… perspective.

He is just going through the regular grief cycle. I know full well that he has got to feel everything he is feeling and it makes sense that sexy feelings aren’t what’s going on for him right now.

I think I am just leaving this here as a marker of someone who loves sex with their long-term partner, loves her partner and hopefully has enough sense and perspective to not get too pushy about it being 2 1/2 weeks… almost 3. Probably the longest we’ve ever gone without. Yes, he needs more love from me than ever and he’s got it— don’t worry, he’s getting my affection. This last year or so has been even happier than the first 17. He’s so precious!


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## Lunacik (Apr 19, 2014)

Didn't count because I don't care.


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## deafcrossfitter (Nov 30, 2019)

Almost a year and let me tell you I almost pressed my ass against a door handle because I thought it looked phallic in nature. 

Sent from my SM-N960U using Tapatalk


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## islandlight (Aug 13, 2013)

Yes, it can be difficult. I NEVER thought about cheating on an SO. But with that last boyfriend who hardly ever wanted sex ... yes, I did think about it. 

After that, it took a long time to get used to the idea that I would probably never have sex again. I guess I'm still not used to it.


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