# Deal-breakers you shouldn't really admit to.



## Lovable (Apr 1, 2017)

I've been thinking about this all day and I have some more:

A guy with blonde curly hair- I don't know why but I just can't

Girls with really short hair, yeah Rihanna could pull it off but that's it. 

People with dogs, I'm not good with dogs. I like cats and want him/her to like them as well so our kids can grow up with cats 

People where their heads are to big or to small for their body


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

It is a turn off to me when people give various kinds of servers a harder time than necessary. This is sort of case by case. Obviously there are shitty servers which I think deserve a hard time, but that is usually few and far between where it is warranted. I just cannot stand being condescending to servers. Or quizzing them extra on stupid crap on a menu etc. I find it just brings me back to having been in many service related jobs. I don't know I have just been on a few dates with foodies who were snobs. It is fine to be a foodie. Foodies do not bug me. But Christ could ya not scoff and roll your eyes at the waiter because they do not know 150 brewery and wine blends here. Get the fuck over yourself.


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## Antipode (Jul 8, 2012)

Deal breakers I shouldn't admit? Hmm, I'm not sure. I'm prone to finding perfection, so I don't have a problem admitting if someone meets a deal breaker xD

I guess one of two is their hair. He must have some hair. I'm not too terribly picky about the style, but I don't like guys who have shaved head, or very short hair. I like guys with a little bit of bangs. Hair can make or break a man.

As for personality, a deal breaker is if they do not have an uncompromising sense of humor. Someone who is quick witted and able to roll with jokes and easily express all angles of humor, even sexual. The right kind of humor can almost make up for any other emotional shortcoming haha.


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## Metaphysicalmermaid (May 19, 2017)

Have to be intelligent and open minded, otherwise to the curb with em. Also has to be cute and different from the rest, able to understand me, and accept me. Edgy hair, I know it's dumb, but it turns me on... 

Sense of humor. If they can't make me laugh it's donezo

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## Finny (Jul 17, 2015)

I like my women bossy / controlling, and more on the feminine side.


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## shazam (Oct 18, 2015)

Sensational said:


> It is a turn off to me when people give various kinds of servers a harder time than necessary. This is sort of case by case. Obviously there are shitty servers which I think deserve a hard time, but that is usually few and far between where it is warranted. I just cannot stand being condescending to servers. Or quizzing them extra on stupid crap on a menu etc. I find it just brings me back to having been in many service related jobs. I don't know I have just been on a few dates with foodies who were snobs. It is fine to be a foodie. Foodies do not bug me. But Christ could ya not scoff and roll your eyes at the waiter because they do not know 150 brewery and wine blends here. Get the fuck over yourself.


I'm the exact same, I'm always really nice and passive. If I'm not I just feel like a dick. 

To name a few occasions I remember I was out with my ex's family and friends. And the server came up and reeled off the whole menu, memorised off by heart. Now, we were all like "wtf is this", but when she finished she was ridiculed and everyone was like "right how on earth are we to remember all that harr harr harr!" ... I was like "you pick one thing you like out of what she said".
I mean it was mad of her reeling off the whole menu, but it's part of her job. It's almost like giving a presentation. 

Then another friend was like "no knives and forks... jesus christ". Like this girl is notorious for giving waiters a hard time. I suppose they feel entitled because they're paying for the experience. I'm paying for the food.

I also went out with a girl in Spain and the waiter kept on calling me Sir, hehe. Sometimes the Sir is a little off putting though. Like when I'm getting coffee.


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## 7rr7s (Jun 6, 2011)

If she's into fucking sharks, then no. No thanks. I'm not into shark whores. Land whales, maybe, but shark whores is where draw the line.


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## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

Bad Hombre said:


> If she's into fucking sharks, then no. No thanks. I'm not into shark whores. Land whales, maybe, but shark whores is where draw the line.


It was ONE time. God blue.


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## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

If you're not speaking out of a computer like Stephen Hawking why would I or anyone else want to fuck you? 

Yeah. Get lost, normie.


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## daleks_exterminate (Jul 22, 2013)

Honestly, if he's not into starwars, I'd think I was looking for love in Alderaan spaces. 

Maybe it seems stupid, but I grew up watching 4,5&6 and even if the prequels are the absolute worst I still like them, even if George hates us all and didn't give Darth jar jar...

Maybe if he was willing to watch them. but id start with 1 &2, clone wars, 4-7 and rebels so that's a lot of time investment.


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## Allonsy (Mar 30, 2017)

I only date dogs.:ninja:


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## Clyme (Jul 17, 2014)

Lady Pirate said:


> Many might cringe at hearing "codependent" but I get what you mean.
> 
> When I was a kid and at church heard "it's not good for man to be alone" I didn't get it. I was the kid who said "I NEVER WANNA GET MARRIED!" But now I understand that no matter what, we all must admit at some point that our social groups, our hobbies, our careers,
> our stuff, doesn't make us happy entirely or meet emotional needs. We are all codependent in some way and that's something that I believe you're looking for: someone who recognizes that and doesn't enter a relationship as a separate thing in their life, but because they know that in order to live a full life and even be happy in their professional life they need some lovin'.


While I do agree with what you're saying, I actually did mean "codependent" in the true sense of the word, hence my posting here. I am, fortunately, already in a relationship with someone who is as codependent as me and we've been together for six or so years now. When I say codependent, I specifically mean that I seek out a relationship with someone who, like me, would feel a chronic sense of emptiness without that relationship, who would be greatly uncomfortable with being apart for lengthier periods of time (e.g. a week or more), who wants to spend nearly all of the time they can with me (with the exception of going to work, etc.), and so on. So, while I do agree with your comments about the need for love as a basic human desire, I actually do mean "codependent" in the true sense of the word.


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## angelfish (Feb 17, 2011)

Not having a degree as high as mine. 

I met this really nice guy at work once who was attractive enough and he told me he was taking classes to get his GED and it just... ended... there.


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## MyName (Oct 23, 2009)

I'll just post odd ones that may sound silly. 

Pit/leg hair. It's been suggested to me that I could just ask them to shave, but I'd just........rather not. And if they didn't want to I just couldn't be attracted to them and I'd prefer not to date someone and then ask them to change something significant about themselves. 

Not being willing to wear any kind of lingerie/special underwear. It doesn't necessarily have to be crazy fetishwear, but not plain colored cotton granny panties all the time. Part of this is that I have the sneaking suspicion that if a woman was with her dream man who she found perfectly attractive she'd wear just about anything he wanted her to, so if she won't for me it's because she doesn't think I'm worth impressing. 

Not being willing to be on top at least some of the time in sex.


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## greye (May 25, 2017)

Acne. I feel bad about it, but I really just can't kiss somebody with a gross face.

Too thin/too fat. Little bony guys are unattractive to me, big guys too.

Long hair. I know man buns are the big thing now, but I just couldn't. I usually don't like the kind of guys that usually have them, too.

I also have a strong preference for introverts, even though I'm an extrovert myself. 

For girls small breasts are more attractive.


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## 5tarrynight (Mar 12, 2016)

They cannot like video games. 
No offense, but to me it comes off as immature.


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## Kenkao (Dec 18, 2016)

If it's about physical, i haven't discovered any physical dealbreakers yet

Personality - arrogance and airheads; controlling and manipulative 

Beliefs - I'm a believer so I couldn't imagine myself be with someone who's unbeliever (atheist). Im so sorry. By believer i don't mean traditonal or religious. 


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## Donovan (Nov 3, 2009)

aside from physical things, like inherent looks? 


where i live (in the south, u.s.), there's a certain breed of person who has been clopped off a giant, shuddering mass of "sameness"; they literally all look alike, talk alike, dress alike, and think alike. 
this takes different routes: there is a distinct "hipster" trend, and a distinct "southern preppy" trend. the former is actually preferable if it's just their style, as the chances of liking that look and "being that person" are lower than found in the former group. 

but specifically? this good ol' girl, super "i must attach myself to what is currently popular in my vicinity, and be scared of what does not fit this"-thing is, oh my god, repulsive. 

the same goes for super-hood/ghetto. that doesn't mean that you lived there and therefore are influenced by the setting, but, just like the above group, if you willingly attempt to be a shallow rendition of a subculture... i kind of hate you; just a little bit. 


if you're too uncomfortable with your body to do anything other than regular, boring sex. i won't dislike you for this--i know it comes from a place of discomfort and i'll likely feel badly for you--but after a while i will be internally screaming. 


you always need to be out with your friends. go, do your thing, but if you're dependent on them and they have a say in your relationship... to a degree that may be healthy, but to a degree it's also like dating a child. it'll be hard to respect you. 


you really need other people to like you, to the point that it changes how you act when you're out. i get it, we all have faces, we all have modes of dealing with the outer world, but i need you to be strong enough to, _be you_. and to be okay with that. even if it makes you shy and you stammer, at least you have the strength to stammer instead of changing.


if you're one of these, "i'm a powerful woman"-types, don't fucking bother. please. we don't have to argue, i actually just don't even want to hear it, let alone give you the attention you're after by entertaining that conversation. 
if you're so fucking powerful, you wouldn't have to tell everyone about it. shut up already. 



as always, i'm sure i have more, but i just can't think of them really. some things pop out immediately, other than that, i have a hard time saying what i do and do not like.


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## Donovan (Nov 3, 2009)

OrangeAppled said:


> I don't date outside my religion anymore. Tried it...and it doesn't work out. That may seem obvious, but it's something a lot of people think is too narrow, as it greatly reduces my options.


 what religion are you that this greatly decreases your options? 
it doesn't matter, as we'll never meet each other in real life--i'm just curious, as you didn't mention it.


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## Donovan (Nov 3, 2009)

Wild said:


> 1. If they don't like animals, they're out.
> 2. If they don't eat pussy or are otherwise easily grossed out by sexual activities, get out.
> 3. If they're grossed out by the idea of a period, get out.
> 4. If they're a whiney bitch that isn't willing to work for what they want, get out.
> ...



hahahahaha! makeup? really? 

what if the idea just makes them uncomfortable? like, they aren't worried about being gay all of a sudden, and it has nothing to do with masculine reasons, but just the idea that a person wants to see them in such a silly light isn't something they really trust another person with?


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## BNB (Feb 15, 2017)

Salmon said:


> Tattoos. If you want to know how many dicks a girl has taken, multiply the number of her tattoos by ten.
> 
> People who look for partners outside their race. I have no hatred against other races, but I don't think we should mix. We're different and it should stay that way.
> 
> ...


The first two.... wtf?


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## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)

girlnextgrave said:


> I can't date guys without facial hair. If they're bare-faced it's an instant turnoff.


"He that hath a beard is more than a youth, and he that hath no beard is less than a man; and he that is more than a youth is not for me, and he that is less than a man, I am not for him."


But yeah, facial hair is sexy.


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## g_w (Apr 16, 2013)

succ said:


> Alright, thanks for taking the time to explain your motivations behind that deal-breaker. That does make a lot of sense. You don't really see many hollywood actors going for nuclear physicists and psychology does recognise the in-group bias.


Well, Dolph Lundgren was awarded a Fullbright Scholarship to MIT and has a Master's in Chem Engineering...


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## shameless (Apr 21, 2014)

Nobody shorter than me (I am 5'3)


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## napkineater (Mar 26, 2013)

BNB said:


> The first two.... wtf?


guys look 

_This is what a sane person looks like _


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## Illz (Mar 11, 2017)

Sensational said:


> Nobody shorter than me (I am 5'3)


Im...the same height but Im a boy so I look shorter, probably even shorter than you...


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## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)

BNB said:


> The first two.... wtf?


While I have met people who think this (I avoid those people) My guess is:


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## Salmon (Jun 2, 2017)

BNB said:


> The first two.... wtf?


I know with all the political correctness you could find the 2nd one shocking. But the first one, really, you think there's nothing disgusting about a woman desecrating her body like that? She should have some self-respect.


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## napkineater (Mar 26, 2013)

Salmon said:


> I know with all the political correctness you could find the 2nd one shocking. But the first one, really, you think there's nothing disgusting about a woman desecrating her body like that? She should have some self-respect.


Fucking fed up with political correctness

Why can't I proclaim my love for children's bottoms and licking peanut butter off my dog's balls without social repercussions??

Edit: Shit I forgot this is deal breakers you shouldn't really admit to because everyone else just dumps their laundry list of deal-breakers. @Salmon is the only actually playing the game lol


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## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)

napkineater said:


> Fucking fed up with political correctness
> 
> Why can't I proclaim my love for children's bottoms and licking peanut butter off my dog's balls without repercussions??


As long as you're not being defiled by an opposite race penis.....
:dry:


Eta: while I do think this poster is trolling, the other week in the grocery store my son got called a halfbreed. So I side eye a bit.


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## napkineater (Mar 26, 2013)

Hellena Handbasket said:


> opposite race


hehe


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## Chesire Tower (Jan 19, 2013)

Hellena Handbasket said:


> While I have met people who think this (I avoid those people) My guess is:



Awesome gif.


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## herinb (Aug 24, 2013)

If their face constantly appears as though they have recently smelled shit. Call me shallow, but I don't want no shit faces up on me.


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## Salmon (Jun 2, 2017)

I'm not trolling at all. I would not date a race-mixer. That people think this is terrible is a symptom of a sick society. I think the races should be diverse, not one super blob.

And yes, this is the thread for things you don't just go around telling people. I don't go screaming this through a megaphone, although maybe I should :crazy:

This is MY deal-breaker, get over it.


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## malphigus (Jan 15, 2014)

1. Not okay with LGBTQ folk. Especially the T part. A lot of people are okay with gay and lesbian people, but with trans people not so much. Well I'm trans, so it goes without saying. Notice how this already cuts my dating pool by about 80%.

2. Someone significantly younger than me and someone significantly older. I like to date my peers, thank you.

3. Outside the 5'5" - 5'9" range. No shorter and no taller than that. I'm 5'7", and I just feel like a child if I date someone significantly taller than me and I feel like I'm responsible all the time if I date someone significantly shorter.

4. Very religious. I'm an atheist agnostic, so yeah.

5. Must be able speak the languages I'm fluent in (English and my native language, Indonesian). Sorry, but I like communicating my ideas and thoughts and a language barrier won't cut it.

6. Average to high sex drive. I just don't think sex is all that important.

For people who think points 3 and 6 are pushing it: On the flipside, I'm okay with fat/skinny people, and I don't care what your body looks like. You can't have it all, folks. :kitteh:

edit: typo


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## MyName (Oct 23, 2009)

catharsiis said:


> Bad music taste. I seriously don't think I could date someone with a music taste I dislike.


I'm a little like this with movies. I used to be a film student and like classic/art house type stuff so I take them very seriously. I could look past it, though.


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## thirtyhertz (Nov 7, 2013)

- People who are extremely social. Sooner or later they would be bothered by my low need of social contact.

- People who conform to society's expectations. This scraps about 98% of people, but I can't deal with them for prolonged amounts of time.


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## SgtPepper (Nov 22, 2016)

Salmon said:


> I'm not trolling at all. I would not date a race-mixer. That people think this is terrible is a symptom of a sick society. I think the races should be diverse, not one super blob.
> 
> And yes, this is the thread for things you don't just go around telling people. I don't go screaming this through a megaphone, although maybe I should :crazy:
> 
> This is MY deal-breaker, get over it.


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## Grandmaster Yoda (Jan 18, 2014)

daleks_exterminate said:


> I have a few more specifics after my starwars point:
> 
> your IQ isn't at least 140, if you do not love pi, if you're not a ginger who speaks Dutch and English perfectly with a deep voice and sexy accent, if you don't own a pair of socks with dogs wearing high heels or boxer briefs off the days of the week, if you don't really love video games and don't want to play them together, if you aren't kind and funny, if you don't like tabletops and board games, you're not into Terri Pratchett novels, and you don't judge intentions over actions...
> 
> ...


It's so easy to cheat on those tests. I got a 146 only after remembering all of the right answers and speed answering.


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## Grandmaster Yoda (Jan 18, 2014)

I don't like gay men. They are so clingy sometimes!


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## napkineater (Mar 26, 2013)

malphigus said:


> 1. Not okay with LGBTQ folk. Especially the T part. A lot of people are okay with gay and lesbian people, but with trans people not so much. *Well I'm trans*, so it goes without saying. Notice how this already cuts my dating pool by about 80%.


?????

wtf bro


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## Tropes (Jul 7, 2016)

This is kind of becoming a general deal breaker thread, while the OP makes me think it was meant to be more about controversial or embarrassing deal breakers. In that spirit...

When it comes to romantic choice, sexual & romantic history becomes a factor for me. For many that's a vulnerable area, the social ramifications are pretty attune to slut-shaming, but the way I experience it is more like this:





Thankfully it's rather rare, It's only really a factor if I am actually finding myself falling in love, and the lack of possessiveness has historically proved to be pretty strong evidence that I am not, so... No big deal there.


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## Crimson Ash (May 16, 2012)

Religion.

I've had a long internal battle with this for the longest time, but the more years that pass the more I see myself completely unable to coexist with someone who believes in a higher power. One that governs their moral motivation due to its existence, whom they convey responsibility towards for certain activity in life and that they hold higher than anything else in the world.

I was raised roman catholic, I used to be quite devout in my practice until I had some quite powerful emotional moments during my late teen years which forced me completely away from belief in any way shape or form.

While I have loved before those who were religious, I simply can't see past that as a barrier in me fully committing myself to them because of how deep a part religion usually plays in believers.

Don't get me wrong, I fully understand the need for religion in society and hold no ill will towards anyone who chooses the belief in anything at all but personally I won't be able to live and have a long term relationship with someone who believes in something I do not.


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## Inveniet (Aug 21, 2009)

I second the nice arse.
Not too big boobs.
Needs to be a gamma in socionics to even consider dating seriously.
Needs to have a "pretty" face.
Needs to not have a dog.
Needs to not have problematic etnich/cultural/religious issues that inconvenience me.

I guess I could come up with more, but this is of the top of my head.


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## IDontThinkSo (Aug 24, 2011)

When she drinks coffee and gets sentimental about it, calling it little coffee, a good little coffee, my little coffee, just get the fuck out Gollum.


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## Alles_Paletti (May 15, 2013)

Smoking is an absolute dealbreaker. 

I find the smell disgusting. Not to mention the smell in your clothes after you've been exposed to smoke for some time.


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## PandaBoo (Apr 29, 2015)

Alles_Paletti said:


> Smoking is an absolute dealbreaker.
> 
> I find the smell disgusting. Not to mention the smell in your clothes after you've been exposed to smoke for some time.


What he said. Along with bad hygiene that comes with bad smells. Overuse of cologne or perfume is a no as well. My sense of smell is too sensitive. Do yourself a favor and make it so that taking showers is a part of your routine.


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## tinyheart (Jun 17, 2016)

Impatient, nonaccommodative, never listens, excessive energy (like basically ExxPs = no.)


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## EndsOfTheEarth (Mar 14, 2015)

PandaBoo said:


> Overuse of cologne or perfume is a no as well. My sense of smell is too sensitive. Do yourself a favor and make it so that taking showers is a part of your routine.


This. I can smell my neighbour while he is inside his own house with the doors shut. I was out walking the other day and smelt the driver of a car that was passing on the roundabout. WTF is up with personal fragrances that throw chemtrails meters ahead and behind an individual? Most people's taste in fragrance is noxious these days. I don't want to be doused in your idea of a synthetic musk just by passing you on the street or living in your neighbourhood.


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## Flaming Bassoon (Feb 15, 2013)

In general:


Overweight (by a lot and barring medical issues)
Smoke/chew tobacco. I'm allergic to smoke and chewing is nasty af.
Drink too much
Serious b.o. (goes along with all of the above, actually)
Gross teeth
Have a dirty house. I'm not the cleanest person in the world, but it makes them seem lazy and gross.
Shallow
Not open-minded
Not intellectually curious. They'd be a total bore to me.

And for the menfolk:



If they're already around my age (early twenties) and have balding or thinning hair. I'm obsessed with hair, so this is a no-no unless he's *really* special.

This is why I'm still single, folks.


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## malphigus (Jan 15, 2014)

napkineater said:


> ?????
> 
> wtf bro


wut?? What about that part that you bolded?


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## Queen of Cups (Feb 26, 2010)

IDontThinkSo said:


> When she drinks coffee and gets sentimental about it, calling it little coffee, a good little coffee, my little coffee, just get the fuck out Gollum.



You get this image in your mind:


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## IDontThinkSo (Aug 24, 2011)

Hellena Handbasket said:


> You get this image in your mind:


totally


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## napkineater (Mar 26, 2013)

malphigus said:


> wut?? What about that part that you bolded?


You're trans but you won't date LGBT? How can you like ponies and not LGBT?

Apologies if I'm being judgemental, I'm just confused.


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## Katie Tran (Apr 8, 2017)

*Shallow (probably):*

-Someone who is an oversensitive and spineless SJW that probably uses Tumblr 

-Someone who has a sensitive male ego and uses distasteful phrases like "Ha! Gaaaay!"

-Someone who has a lower sex drive than me.

-Someone who is religious at all is a huge turn off. Someone who sees beyond religion is a huge turn on.

-Someone who smells and do not know how to dress in a classy way.

-White guys who think wearing those moccasins, sport sweats, wife-beaters and Nike sandals are attractive in anyway.

-Heavy smokers

-Those with yellow fever and love those Kawaii Japanese/Chinese women because of too much porn

-Someone who watches too much porn and build their fantasy and expectations based on that

-Shitty music tastes

-Those dudes who posts pics of their abs for their profile thinking it's attractive and original in anyway

-Trump voters = idiot in my mind therefore turn off

-Can't hold an intellectually stimulating conversation with me

-Controlling, clingy and overbearing

-Overweight

-Underweight

-Pasty, pale skin along with being too skinny

-Uses 'u, ur, y' when typing without any classy and proper English

-Someone who is shy, introverted and spineless to approach me

-Someone who places their career and job over relationships; cause that's my job LMAO

-They don't have an appealing and stable job with their own living space

-No sense of similar aesthetics to mine

-Just plain not physically attractive

-Boring

*
Should go without saying:*

-Has problems with periods

-Sexist 

-Racist

-Unloyal/cheater


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## malphigus (Jan 15, 2014)

napkineater said:


> You're trans but you won't date LGBT? How can you like ponies and not LGBT?
> 
> Apologies if I'm being judgemental, I'm just confused.


My original post states that I won't date people that's judgemental of LGBT folk. Not that I myself is judgemental.


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## Katie Tran (Apr 8, 2017)

I was having phone sex with a guy yesterday.

He refused to bring a condom the next time because he wanted me to:
"Experience the real feel of his cock."

And that Asian women are his favorite because:

"They are so submissive."

And that nig*er is his 'favorite word.'

There won't be a next time.


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## RyuukoGo (Apr 6, 2015)

She has to be more feminine than I am if not the feminine part of my personality takes over and I become a wimp.Fortunately at the first date I can see how I am with her and get a good idea how we will balance each other.


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## Sovereign (Aug 19, 2011)

Smell. If your BO (armpits, crotch, etc) doesn't smell good to me, I'll start letting you down easy. Some people have acceptable funk and some do not. And I'll know if you're masking. My nose is a beast.

This is a totally separate issue from hygiene, ftr. Feel free to go full European so long as I like your personal smell. If not, there simply aren't enough showers in existence.


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## EndsOfTheEarth (Mar 14, 2015)

If you think it's perfectly okay to drink McCafe barista coffee we are breaking up.


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