# ISTP sad and down



## Tebo (Jul 14, 2012)

I haven't done anything interesting with my life. I go to school and that's about it. I don't really get to hangout with my friends and I don't get to do any kind of hobbies. I stopped reading books (except for school books), playing video games and watching movies (at home alone), because I just can't stand watching some character live their own life, because it reminds me about my lame life. I've been sheltered all of my life, which isn't entirely a bad thing, but also not a good thing for me, because I can't do anything. I want to learn how to ride a motorcycle, surf, snowboard or go skydiving. I'm 18yrs old and it's summer vacation and I have done nothing, but volunteer. I haven't gone to the beach, an amusement park, movie theatre or anywhere fun. I haven't hung out with my friends, because I'm stuck home almost all day. I'm bored of not doing anything with my life. I don't know what to do to get out if this sad state of mind, because at the rate I'm going I might become depressed or something worse. Any advise would help thanks.


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## petite libellule (Jul 4, 2012)

I have been through lots of ups and down in my life. One thing I have always done to rip myself out of a depression 'funk' is to write lists. When your feeling sad, do you think listening to emo music is gonna get you to feel better? 

Google happy songs. Make a list of 10 happy songs you love. 
My favorite is Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morison.'

Other list ideas, (A List):

1. Top ten funny commercials on youtube. 

EXAMPLE:





2. Create a silly / funny / happy photo album on your computer or pinterest or whatever ...

3. Things you think are cute: this can be a photo list ablum too










4. Things you find lovely. Like the smell of rain or wet leaves in the fall ...

5. Things you want to do when your 20, 30, 40 and so on ... 
I have plans to get into gardening when I turn 50 

Be creative. While it may not come as natural for other types, the capacity is still there. 
Some things don't come natural for me, but I have to do them. So I read how to and so on ...

THE POINT:
TO RE-ADJUST YOUR FOCUS TILL YOU ARE IN A BETTER PLACE ...

6. An epic list, youtube videos and so on. Here are a few Epic things I like:

EXAMPLE: 

LED SLIPPERS









OR THIS DUDE ...






OR OF COURSE. YOU CAN JUST BUY YOURSELF A HAPPY HAT )


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## Tebo (Jul 14, 2012)

I will definitely take your advice to adjust my focus on more positive things. Thank you.


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## daydr3am (Oct 20, 2010)

Why aren't you allowed to do things/leave your home? Are your parents controlling and overly protective? 

You're barely out of grade school so it is pretty normal to have not experienced much. I felt the same way when I turned 18 and wanted to do a bunch of new stuff. I didn't though, because I couldn't afford it, so I worked my butt off for the things and experiences I do have. The things you want to do require money (except for going to the beach), so maybe you can start looking for a job and use your income to experience the things you want to do?


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## Kormoran (Mar 15, 2012)

Tebo said:


> I haven't done anything interesting with my life. I go to school and that's about it. I don't really get to hangout with my friends and I don't get to do any kind of hobbies. I stopped reading books (except for school books), playing video games and watching movies (at home alone), because I just can't stand watching some character live their own life, because it reminds me about my lame life. I've been sheltered all of my life, which isn't entirely a bad thing, but also not a good thing for me, because I can't do anything. I want to learn how to ride a motorcycle, surf, snowboard or go skydiving. I'm 18yrs old and it's summer vacation and I have done nothing, but volunteer. I haven't gone to the beach, an amusement park, movie theatre or anywhere fun. I haven't hung out with my friends, because I'm stuck home almost all day. I'm bored of not doing anything with my life. I don't know what to do to get out if this sad state of mind, because at the rate I'm going I might become depressed or something worse. Any advise would help thanks.


You sound suspiciously like me...


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## Tebo (Jul 14, 2012)

Yeah, my parents are controlling and over protective of me. I can't do much right now, because most of the things that I want to do does require money. My parents don't want me to get a job, because they think that it will distract me from my education, but I will try to show them the positive side of getting a job, so that hopefully I can convince them that a job and an education can work. Thank you everyone, I really appreciate the comments.


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## petite libellule (Jul 4, 2012)

Your parents are people too. They are doing what they know. Try to understand.

Every generation is smarter than the last

And wiser than the next ...

They (most often) are doing the best they can with what they have (experience/knowledge)

If they DIDN'T try to control you, set boundaries ... THEN you have something to be depressed about.

p.s. My mom was an INSANE control freak when I was younger. 
Even today, she will say things that crack up the whole family, as she still thinks I'm 13 >.<

It WILL Get Better


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## Adythiel (Jun 28, 2012)

If you want to go somewhere fun then just go. You don't need anyone's permission to go somewhere to have fun. Other people control you only if you let them. What happens after college? Will you let them still control your life? As for the job, not having any job experience can be more damaging once you graduate. Get a part time job, it would be good for you.

It simply boils down to this. You have to decide you want to take control over your own life. It is the only thing you will ever really have control over.


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## Tebo (Jul 14, 2012)

You're right it will eventually get better and that they are doing the best they can. I just have to remember that. Thanks 

Also I know I can go places without my parents permission, but I just don't want to disobey/ go against them.


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## AstralSoldier (Jun 18, 2012)

Tebo said:


> I haven't done anything interesting with my life. I go to school and that's about it. I don't really get to hangout with my friends and I don't get to do any kind of hobbies. I stopped reading books (except for school books), playing video games and watching movies (at home alone), because I just can't stand watching some character live their own life, because it reminds me about my lame life. I've been sheltered all of my life, which isn't entirely a bad thing, but also not a good thing for me, because I can't do anything. I want to learn how to ride a motorcycle, surf, snowboard or go skydiving. I'm 18yrs old and it's summer vacation and I have done nothing, but volunteer. I haven't gone to the beach, an amusement park, movie theatre or anywhere fun. I haven't hung out with my friends, because I'm stuck home almost all day. I'm bored of not doing anything with my life. I don't know what to do to get out if this sad state of mind, because at the rate I'm going I might become depressed or something worse. Any advise would help thanks.


Well Tebo, sounds like a classic case of the 'I got school, adult ethics, and life-changing decisions on my mind' blues. Welcome to young adulthood! I'm there too, and so are most of us, and you'll be learning more about yourself EVERYDAY from here on in. I have to say that being at either end of the sheltered spectrum is no good for personal development. How can you learn about yourself if you're protected from your own mistakes, or discovering your own strengths? If you want to learn how to ride a motorcycle, surf, snowboard, or skydive I suggest DOING IT!  get yourself informed on how to do it, and do it with safety in mind, rather than haphazardly. All those things you suggested sounds very cool. What's stopping you besides saving up enough money for it? There are clubs, and all kinds of organizations across the net, that can help you out with these things.

The simple truth is, you're not living your life, because (correct me if I'm wrong) you're favoring the external/social opinion of others as the meter stick to measure your efforts up to; those "what I should do" thoughts that come from the moral center of life we internalize from others that you probably believe you're expected to live/lead over what you want for yourself; balance is the key Tebo. If you want to do all these things you say, just do them; it's all material that you're going to incorporate into your personality to learn about what is most significant to you and your individual self. You have to take this time to get to learn yourself, or you'll completely loose yourself, and won't recognize the you that's in the mirror. So, what makes you, you Tebo?

For me, when I'm in that sad state, I do something I've never done before. I look for things I've never done before, anything interesting and new. I think people who are sheltered need to get out and test themselves against the world to learn about themselves and gain independence of mind, and belief. You don't learn about yourself if you don't put yourself into the things you do, not based on what is simply morally correct by others standards, but by what you 'feel/think/believe' is significant and should be present in your own life.


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## this is my username (Apr 15, 2011)

Tebo said:


> I haven't done anything interesting with my life. I go to school and that's about it. I don't really get to hangout with my friends and I don't get to do any kind of hobbies. I stopped reading books (except for school books), playing video games and watching movies (at home alone), because I just can't stand watching some character live their own life, because it reminds me about my lame life. I've been sheltered all of my life, which isn't entirely a bad thing, but also not a good thing for me, because I can't do anything. I want to learn how to ride a motorcycle, surf, snowboard or go skydiving. I'm 18yrs old and it's summer vacation and I have done nothing, but volunteer. I haven't gone to the beach, an amusement park, movie theatre or anywhere fun. I haven't hung out with my friends, because I'm stuck home almost all day. I'm bored of not doing anything with my life. I don't know what to do to get out if this sad state of mind, because at the rate I'm going I might become depressed or something worse. Any advise would help thanks.


rock climbing gym
regular gym
exercisey things. I'm not really sure if this is what you're saying, but it sounds like you can't leave the house because of parental reasons? If so, it should be very easy to create a compelling argument to let you out for exercise. 

Is there somewhere more hands-on/active you can volunteer at? Coaching children's sports? 

I've lived with an ISTP for almost 3 years, and he is the most depressed when he is not exercising/being physically active.

Hope this was at least a tiny bit helpful. Sorry you're feeling so down.


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## Razare (Apr 21, 2009)

Tebo said:


> Yeah, my parents are controlling and over protective of me. I can't do much right now, because most of the things that I want to do does require money. My parents don't want me to get a job, because they think that it will distract me from my education, but I will try to show them the positive side of getting a job, so that hopefully I can convince them that a job and an education can work. Thank you everyone, I really appreciate the comments.



Your poor parents have been brainwashed by modern society. I spent the better part of 6 years in different colleges.

You can learn a lot more 3 months at a job than you can in a year at college. The problem is parents often assume that their children have all the prerequisite life-skills to have a job and that only education can hold them back...

This isn't true. At college the one thing they hammered into me the most were having people-skills and work-ethic, which is something they could not teach but only instill in us the importance of such practices. That's one of the biggest complaints from employers too... the college graduates often know enough book-knowledge, but they lack work-knowledge to successfully execute their book-smarts.

This is one reason why they prefer to hire experienced employees over college graduates. On a resume, it'll honestly look better if you're a college graduate who held a job at McDonalds during college than if you had no job and filled-in the spot with b.s.


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