# NO WOMAN WANTS TO GIVE MEN EMOTIONAL SUPPORT. IS THERE ANY POINT IN WANTING A RELATIONSHIP WITH ONE?



## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MoStoner12 said:


> ive dated several women and seen which girls are turned off when i open up about my life. women will rarely say, "im leaving you because you are weak" but it actually did happen that once a girl said she wouldnt be with because i told her i was sad, because i was in a dark place in my life. then went on to try it on with my best friend. we later tried a relationship when she again perceived me as high value. but i could never trust her and she felt that so it never worked. even though on paper everything was perfect
> 
> it doesnt matter if you listen to her or not. women just rant to rant because they love to talk and are emotional creatures. if you never discuss your issues she thinks "he has his shit together"


you generalize pretty well based on what happened "once"

but this is what I meant when I asked for clarification. like how do you want your gf to support you, just listen, or affirm your feelings, come up with solutions, is it really enough if she just stays with you...?
apparently you don't feel the need to react to women's ranting in any way, why should women give you any more of a response?


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

eeo said:


> Is there any chance you wouldn't actually want to have anything to do with women who could give you the kind of love you want? Because they might not have the kind of attributes you're really attracted to.
> 
> All men are not the same. All women are not the same. What do these women you've been with have in common? What attracted you to them in the first place?


ive never felt it so i would not know. the deepest relationship i had was met with the response "you are always so negative. you are hard work. i hate when you start talking sad"
i am very selective with the women i date. i only choose and can get along with certain types of women. on paper they all have everything i want

all men are the same, lets not kid ourselves. they all want the same thing at the end of they day. we are creatures with hard wired brains. this is the mbti chat right?. i take it we all understand our fundamental needs are coded biological responses. women are all different but what turns women off is all the same for most across the board. 

all these women are all entj, intj, infj, infp type of women. all very high achieving, kind and beautiful. it is not a flaw in the women but a flaw in myself i did not understand. i just asked the question to see if there were any alternative answers. they are very hot...thats what attracted me, then they turned out to be very smart and kind. thats what made me stay


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Electra said:


> We are listening to you right now as you speak.
> I think you have just met the wrong women.


and i think your thoughts are incorrect.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Electra said:


> If you start your sentence with your thought is incorrect; all that is possibly gonna do is that the female will either avoid you or block you (possibly unless you are related) and stop reading the rest of your post. I suggest you show some respect in the future to people who spend their free time trying to help other people like you. We don't get paid for doing this.


it is disrespectful?? to say??? your thoughts??? ON MY LIFE???? are wrong....????..i think youve just proved my point without ridiculous that reply was 

i can say what you think about my life is wrong. BECAUSE IT IS MY LIFE. are you okay??? how does what you said make any sense??


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

HAL said:


> Hmm you seem a bit angry. I said you had created the dichotomy, i.e. classic man / women rules of romance. A 'complicated dichotomy' isn't really possible because normally a dichotomy is a black/white oversimplification of two connected things.
> 
> In reality there's a ton of nuance. Human variety is one of the most fascinating things to me. People have all different kinds of wants, needs and requirements for romance.
> 
> ...


anger is one of the human responses. theres nothing wrong with it. well whatever the multiple version of a relationship between two parties is, i would love to hear your theories??

this is literally the mbti online forum....how am i getting "there are too many infinite possibilities to narrow human behavior down" answers on this chat of all online chats?? 

it is the basis of why we are here that we believe human behavior can be categorized scientifically to understand the complicated patterns of life

so you can be with someone and not open up about the things that worry you? you can be with someone and just hold in your bad days and not talk to them? i dont talk about my feelings. but sometimes i need the person i love the most to be able to listen to me when im down without judgement. ive never heard of a woman who can do that and never experienced it. it seems like they are all the same in that regard. ive never met a woman who doesnt talk about her problems at least sometimes. i would love to meet this woman that can be with a man who doesnt want to listen to her when shes sad


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## Rift (Mar 12, 2012)

MoStoner12 said:


> I dunno, I guess the realization is overwhelmingly depressing and this is my last attempt at hope. Does this mean I am destined to feel alone forever?


yes.






unless you start preparing yourself for a different outcome












DOGSOUP said:


> it's unclear to me how exactly you want to be loved, what form of emotional support are you looking for?







entitlement, patriarchy, to be simped for rather than just a cucked simp?




Electra said:


> @MoStoner12 I don't think most girls expect men to constantly be strong, personally I respect and value emotional openess and display of vulnarability in men. Maybe its more that some men expect that of other men? Idk.

















---

in alll seriousness, tho, while low self esteem may be a fetisch for some, it's not an attractive trait to many.

most prefer a healthy dose of confidence, neither too much nor too little... unless they're on the rebound or a hot mess themselves.

besides most successful couples don't look at their partner to fulfill *all* of their needs.. it's an unrealistic expectation that quickly crashes a relationship down to reality. . .









Who's Right - Marriage for Moderns (1954)


Who's Right? by Affiliated Film Producers.; McGraw-Hill Text-Films.Marriage for Moderns series by Irving Jacoby; Richard Leacock; Judson Gooding; Henry Adelb...




www.youtube.com





I'd probably suggest that OP consider finding a male mentor that represents his masculine ideal and is in the kind of relationship he desires... because it rather sounds like he needs that kind of representation in his active life. a proverbial father figure or big brother.

or investigate men's retreats and workshops.. there's several, even for singles, that deal with this sort of thing. . . along with traditiional therapy - cbt would make the most sense if he can identify his own obstacles.. but meh, a more structured life coach or a friendly therapeutic ear (which in that case, I'd suggest aim for a lass) to vent to help him id his obstacles and ultimately needs or desires; i.e. what his actual goals are would likely be more affordable than a retreat unless he goes through a localized community program.


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## WickerDeer (Aug 1, 2012)

If you are being serious, perhaps one of the problems you are dealing with is that you didn't grow up knowing how to talk about negative emotions.

It's common for everyone, but perhaps even more common for boys and men who might not have the same type of experiences girls tend to, where they are encouraged to open up and vent and talk through things a little more with other girls (I mean--just relying on theory about gender socializaton).

So perhaps if you consider how you vent about these negative emotions...do you use "I" statements, and have you tried telling your female partner "I just want to talk about something and get it off my chest right now"--this is something that I've read suggested to women who want their male partner to be emotionally supportive. Or I've also read suggestions directed towards women to make sure to thank a man who has been emotionally supportive by listening, because men are apparently not supposed to know if they've been emotionally supportive or not, that it just sounds like a woman complaining pointlessly. 

So like...say "I would really just like to vent for x amount of time" and "thank you for listening to me, I feel a lot better."

At least this is what I read suggested to women who want emotional support from a partner. So idk. I'm American--we don't really like emotionally supporting anyone, male or female.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Dreamcatcherplaceboeffect said:


> I think that women, in general, don’t want a man who is _more_ emotional than they are, but I wouldn’t disregard the entire opposite sex as a whole as being intolerant of male emotions.
> 
> Reflecting back on my personal romantic relationships, I think the thing that bothered me most about negative male emotions is more _how_ they were expressed, rather than the that they occurred.
> 
> ...


ive never been more emotional that girl i was seeing. but even if was i think its gross to have that mindset about someone. but its just biology i guess.

funnily enough ive never had problems from not opening up. the girl gets frustrated. but the female existence is frustrating so its fine. its when i actually tell them exactly the problem she starts acting different

i get the "how" thing but women just vent any which way. if the man doesnt have solutions to his own problems she will view him more negatively. 
with women it is not the over emotion of being sad that is a turn off...but when she is too clingy and needy that is a turn off at the start of relationships. women can cry all day and ive never heard a man complain about their lady being sad. her sadness is often seen as his responsibility to fix too


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## HAL (May 10, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> anger is one of the human responses. theres nothing wrong with it. well whatever the multiple version of a relationship between two parties is, i would love to hear your theories??
> 
> this is literally the mbti online forum....how am i getting "there are too many infinite possibilities to narrow human behavior down" answers on this chat of all online chats??


I don't understand why you're conflating MBTI personality classifications with the general concept of romance.

I mean, the fact that MBTI even exists is proof enough that your one-size-fits-all description of relationship dynamics is simply not correct.

An extreme example I often refer to is the fact that some people like BDSM. The fact that this is a requirement for some people in a relationship is yet more proof that not all relationships have the same dynamic. Personally I have no interest in a BDSM relationship. Ergo, not all relationships are the same.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

Rift said:


> entitlement, patriarchy, to be simped for rather than just a cucked simp?


While getting cucked is definitely the worst, I would still prefer to be the simp rather than be simped for but maybe I am the weird one here


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

Rift said:


> yes.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Unfortunetly the videoes were blocked in my country it said 🙁
But I agree, I think he should get a great male father figure. 🙂


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

DOGSOUP said:


> you generalize pretty well based on what happened "once"
> 
> but this is what I meant when I asked for clarification. like how do you want your gf to support you, just listen, or affirm your feelings, come up with solutions, is it really enough if she just stays with you...?
> apparently you don't feel the need to react to women's ranting in any way, why should women give you any more of a response?


i said it was said once....but happened many times...do you people pay attention or just ask for examples just to dismiss them?

NOT BE JUDGEMENTAL...the response will be different for every woman because attachment and love styles always differ. but the common theme ive noticed is it the general loss of respect for being human and displaying sadness verbally.

i dont see where you got the "apparently you don't feel the need to react to women's ranting in any way". its literally impossible to get a girlfriend by not listening or not saying something when she vents....seriously?....can we not make things up?

every woman, even on this forum will testify that all my responses are thorough and well thought out no matter how detailed their response is ,and i dont even know them... i dont appreciate you making up things about my character to justify your arguments..i hope you dont do that in real life. very annoying


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## Dreamcatcherplaceboeffect (Dec 24, 2020)

MoStoner12 said:


> ive never been more emotional that girl i was seeing. but even if was i think its gross to have that mindset about someone. but its just biology i guess.
> 
> funnily enough ive never had problems from not opening up. the girl gets frustrated. but the female existence is frustrating so its fine. its when i actually tell them exactly the problem she starts acting different
> 
> ...


Hmm... that’s not generally what I’ve observed. I know plenty of men who tend to become avoidant around negative emotions—suddenly they begin working late or finding reasons to just not “be around” when their partner becomes sad, whiny, or irritable.

But, I think our society is largely responsible for instilling male and female gender roles, and that men are more likely to be tolerant of a women’s emotions because they see it as normative behavior, rather than the other way around.

I do think it’s depressive to be around _anyone_ who has problems all the time when they cannot express what they need or they do not care to change them, and that it is just as frustrating to be around women who are like this as it is to be around men who are like this.

There is definitely some truth to the cliche’ that you should be happy and healthy when building a relationship. Something built on a good, strong foundation can weather storms when one (or both) parties goes through something like a depression or if there is a big fight/disagreement. If you have a weak foundation because the relationship forms on fragile footing, even the smallest upset can cause it to crumble.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Rift said:


> yes.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


its a good thing i cant cuss on this forum...

if you think the need to talk about your feelings with someone you trust or care about means you have low self esteem? then im not the one that needs help 

you went a lot of wild places with your answer and im sensing a lot of displaced issues that have little to do with what i said 

but i appreciate the creativity


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

HAL said:


> I don't understand why you're conflating MBTI personality classifications with the general concept of romance.
> 
> I mean, the fact that MBTI even exists is proof enough that your one-size-fits-all description of relationship dynamics is simply not correct.
> 
> An extreme example I often refer to is the fact that some people like BDSM. The fact that this is a requirement for some people in a relationship is yet more proof that not all relationships have the same dynamic. Personally I have no interest in a BDSM relationship. Ergo, not all relationships are the same.


you can literally type into google "personality type dating/flirting/romance" and it will give you a cheat sheet on how to interact with certain types, what they like and what they dont like. some of you havent done enough homework on this topic if you think mbti doesnt relate to 90% of your life...

the fact that mbti exists means that 7 billion can be decided into 16....and im not trying to date no sensors and and im not trying to date no TJs because they are not my type....im not trying to one size fits all with mbti. im one size fits all when it comes to the female response to negative male emotions. 

im glad to hear you dont like the aggressive controlling stuff like the rest of us with deep issues around control. but i fail to see what bdsm has to do with female responses when their man gets sad and wants to talk about it. enlighten me on the connection. even my high Ne cant see any similarities right now


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

DOGSOUP said:


> While getting cucked is definitely the worst, I would still prefer to be the simp rather than be simped for but maybe I am the weird one here


many weird people on this forum its fine. i dont care about being cucked. the woman can easily be replaced with a better looking version. ill simp if she has everything i want, i think any form of compromise is simping. people simp for me just for being who i am (or utterly despise me) so you get used to it. but i like a girl who doesnt put me on a pedestal


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## HAL (May 10, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> you can literally type into google "personality type dating/flirting/romance" and it will give you a cheat sheet on how to interact with certain types, what they like and what they dont like. some of you havent done enough homework on this topic if you think mbti doesnt relate to 90% of your life...
> 
> the fact that mbti exists means that 7 billion can be decided into 16....and im not trying to date no sensors and and im not trying to date no TJs because they are not my type....im not trying to one size fits all with mbti. im one size fits all when it comes to the female response to negative male emotions.
> 
> im glad to hear you dont like the aggressive controlling stuff like the rest of us with deep issues around control. but i fail to see what bdsm has to do with female responses when their man gets sad and wants to talk about it. enlighten me on the connection. even my high Ne cant see any similarities right now


Mate you're being fucking annoying now and I don't like the not-so-subtle aggressive tone you've taken with me for no reason. You have an axe to grind and you're taking it out on the internet. Get over yourself and re-read everything everyone has written. If you can't understand why my example of BDSM illustrates how relationship dynamics are obviously very different for people, that's your problem, not mine.

You're trying to sound smart by saying "this is an MBTI forum!" but the premise of your thread was nothing more than "wahhh I think all women are the same".

Come on man.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MoStoner12 said:


> i said it was said once....but happened many times...do you people pay attention or just ask for examples just to dismiss them?
> 
> NOT BE JUDGEMENTAL...the response will be different for every woman because attachment and love styles always differ. but the common theme ive noticed is it the general loss of respect for being human and displaying sadness verbally.
> 
> ...


Rest assured... if I ever lose respect for you it won't be due to your sadness.


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## Whatexists (Jul 26, 2015)

MoStoner12 said:


> My whole life I thought, "let me become attractive so one day at least one girl will love me how I want". But I have recently found out that wish was a myth...anyone found a purpose in dating women that makes them happy? I dont too much care about good looks or external validation from my peers, that other people like.
> 
> I dunno, I guess the realization is overwhelmingly depressing and this is my last attempt at hope. Does this mean I am destined to feel alone forever?


Yeah, plenty of reasons: Intimacy. Companionship. An ally in building a life. Maybe a sexual partner. Emotional support.

I grew up with a similar thought to wanting to find out how to get women to love me _the way I want_. And yeah, that isn't how love works. Because "the way I want" is fundamentally self-involved and controlling. It's the type of seemingly innocent worldview that would lead to controlling behavior, or (as seems to have happened in your case) get broken.

If emotional support is what you want in a relationship, learn to give it. I have loving supportive relationships with women. But they really became that way once "the way I want" left my mindframe. Dispelling and letting go of this myth is the first step to having genuinely intimate, loving, supportive relationships. Because those things need to be mutual, and "the way I want" isn't mutual at all.

It's a really rough journey.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Dreamcatcherplaceboeffect said:


> Hmm... that’s not generally what I’ve observed. I know plenty of men who tend to become avoidant around negative emotions—suddenly they begin working late or finding reasons to just not “be around” when their partner becomes sad, whiny, or irritable.
> 
> But, I think our society is largely responsible for instilling male and female gender roles, and that men are more likely to be tolerant of a women’s emotions because they see it as normative behavior, rather than the other way around.
> 
> ...


thats called cheating....

its funny, society is never made up of men and women... its just "society"...and ambiguous entity with no discernable or definite origin...like the universe. society is decided up by what women want..... Because men just want sex, so will make society operate with that...but thats just my theory after studying 5000 years of cultural history 

women complain every day and we just put up with it because we want the wet wet. thats why we need guy time. to get away from the stress. from most of our mothers to most of our girlfriends...its just _nag....nag...nag....nag...._ everyday....

40% of marriages end in divorce...i think thats all we need to know about whether monogamy is even natural or just a cultural norm adapted in western society based of ancient German traditions and Christian principles imposed on people as "the right way" when in fact statistics suggest it doesnt even work for most people...most because half the 60% and are miserable and probably 50% of that 60% agree to have sex with other people to keep a healthy relationship


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## Dezir (Nov 25, 2013)

MoStoner12 said:


> none of what you said applies to real life
> 
> every woman i have ever been with has stopped talking to me after opening up
> 
> ...


You are trapped in a loop of stereotypes where you think that you need to be an alpha male to get the girls. You don't need to be an alpha male to get girls. Many girls are not looking for a alpha male, bodyguard or strongman but for a partner.

Women want a comfortable relationship, just like men do, just like you do and you are frustrated that you cannot have a relationship where you can be open about your feelings. Because you are afraid that if you're being open about your feelings you will be left out and abbandoned. And from your experience, you have been. But this could say more about the type of women you dated and the type of relationships you've had than about women in general.

Not all women are like that. There are women who want someone who understands and helps them, someone who will be there for them and that they can be there for. A man with empathy and care. This doesn't make you weak or a wuss, not standing up for yourself when you are fairly speaking you are in the right would make you a wuss.

Because you could also stand up for yourself when you are in all fairness in the wrong to do so, morally and socially speaking. You got to have a sense for these things. It's a lot better to try to have a sense for this things than to try to compensate with an inflated sense of masculinity that ultimately leads to unfulfilling unemotional relationships as you have noticed.

Love is care. Love is care in a very specific way, more than you would care for an average man on the street that you have simpathy for. If there's no such care, that wasn't love you had, it was just a superficial relationship with no connection with the other person. They were interested only in what they have to gain from you, not in you.

Chances are, this is also partially your fault, caused by having stereotypes about the other gender or not being able to connected with the other person yourself. Not only an affective connection, but a communication connection, where you try to understand and empathize with the other person. There are shallow people on both sides, but then again, there are also people who aren't shallow on both sides that you can establish a connection with.

The opposite of superficiality is sensitivity, sensitivity can be beautiful, it takes sensitivity to understand the other person. You need this in life, because people won't always tell you what they think, out of shyness or decency. You can make yourself likeable by being polite and respectful, being appropiate, connecting with people. You got to be a person who is able to feel itself how it makes other people feel. Because people won't tell you all the time when you've bothered them or made them feel bad. And they won't appreciate when you made them feel bad.

If you're unable to feel yourself how you make other people feel and can't establish a connection with people, either any people or people of the other gender, because you're too inconsiderate, you will end up being avoided by people and having bad relationships based on shallow reasons such as looks or physically strength.

Of course, understanding the other person is only half the part, you also have to be decent and try not to upset or bother the other person. This absolutely does not mean not standing up for yourself, but only stand up for yourself when in all fairness you are in the right, not when fairly speaking you are in the wrong. That's what makes the difference between an ahole and someone who just stands up for themselves, someone who makes other people have a hard time or someone who simply defends himself when he or she should rightfully do so because it's their right, context.


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## eeo (Aug 25, 2020)

MoStoner12 said:


> the deepest relationship i had was met with the response "you are always so negative. you are hard work. i hate when you start talking sad"


They were not able to or didn't want to consider your needs and give you what you needed at that moment. Not everybody is well equipped to deal with who they think is a high-maintenance person (not saying that you are for sure, they just might have seen it like that because they either didn't know how or didn't want to deal with negative things in the relationship). Not all women are like that, so you should analyze this only as an issue with these particular persons, and not as a general issue with women.

It could be helpful to analyze yourself and try to find better ways to deal with things that make you negative and frustrated so you could diffuse the intensity of these feelings before you turn to your partner for emotional support. Needing emotional support from your partner, talking about things and venting when necessary is a completely natural thing in a relationship. There might just be a fine line between becoming too intense or needy without realizing it, or expecting more from your partner than they can handle. This is where they'll start looking for ways to get out of this situation. There's only so much a person can handle before it starts affecting them negatively, and that goes for both parties in the relationship.



> i only choose and can get along with certain types of women. on paper they all have everything i want


That's what I was trying to get at. These certain types of women could have the same thing in common as well - they're either not able or don't want to consider their partner's needs. Not good relationship material (maybe not yet, maybe never). I'm definitely not trying to imply that you need to look over your criteria for women you're attracted to, just for your sake, being mindful, and noticing the signs early could help avoid getting into the kind of relationships with them that don't meet your needs in the first place. Because there are definitely women out there who you can be attracted to, and who will be able to provide the kind of emotional support you need.



> all men are the same, lets not kid ourselves. they all want the same thing at the end of they day. we are creatures with hard wired brains. this is the mbti chat right?. i take it we all understand our fundamental needs are coded biological responses. women are all different but what turns women off is all the same for most across the board.


Well, yes, you can say that generally all people want similar things. But, if you start looking at the details and individuals, what people want and are able to give can differ greatly. 



> all these women are all entj, intj, infj, infp type of women. all very high achieving, kind and beautiful. it is not a flaw in the women but a flaw in myself i did not understand. i just asked the question to see if there were any alternative answers. they are very hot...thats what attracted me, then they turned out to be very smart and kind. thats what made me stay


It could still be a flaw in the women as well, considering what I described above. But it depends on the person.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

HAL said:


> Mate you're being fucking annoying now and I don't like the not-so-subtle aggressive tone you've taken with me for no reason. You have an axe to grind and you're taking it out on the internet. Get over yourself and re-read everything everyone has written. If you can't understand why my example of BDSM illustrates how relationship dynamics are obviously very different for people, that's your problem, not mine.
> 
> You're trying to sound smart by saying "this is an MBTI forum!" but the premise of your thread was nothing more than "wahhh I think all women are the same".
> 
> Come on man.


you...came to my chat...to tell me...im annoying you...when i dignified you with a response...

just because certain types of people throw a hissy fit every time someone proves them wrong in an argument doesnt mean you get to start making ad hominem attacks....i suggest you take your big brain and think more about the actual debate than making personal attacks at people you CHOSE to speak to just because they disagree

using F bombs and then calling other people aggressive...i dont wanna make too many assumptions about your race and the country of origin and how you responded and why set people dont like a certain type of people... but mate, get a grip...people can disagree, its not attack on your "sovereign" ego 

bdsm is part of a certain list of kinks that people can experiment on and be into multiple other kinks, it has no definite rule that you must always do it and do it everywhere no matter what and do it with every person you shag. 

but the response, if we can stay on topic, of women to men becoming sad and verbalizing it is something i have found to be universal and is either one or the other. it doesnt have multiple sides to it like sexual kinks.

i didnt complain. i made an observation and it makes me upset. i thought this was a place people could open up and talk about their ideas, but clearly people want to act like children and say things like "youre crying wahhhh" when that is not what im doing...does it look like im a feeler to you?


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## Dreamcatcherplaceboeffect (Dec 24, 2020)

MoStoner12 said:


> thats called cheating....
> 
> its funny, society is never made up of men and women... its just "society"...and ambiguous entity with no discernable or definite origin...like the universe. society is decided up by what women want..... Because men just want sex, so will make society operate with that...but thats just my theory after studying 5000 years of cultural history
> 
> ...


I think you’re very jaded and in a bad headspace right now, honestly. Anyone can find facts or anecdotal evidence to support their “side” of an argument. (Me. You. A dozen other people chiming in on this thread.)

Really, so much of how we view the world and the other individuals living amongst us just boils down to perception. If this is the way _you_ would like to perceive women—it is sad and discouraging—but no one can stop you if you are not receptive to hearing counter arguments and believe that men and women are so “black and white”, fitting neatly into their boxes, without exception.

I hope you can reach a healthier mental state, and that you don’t completely close yourself off to the idea of finding a romantic partner one day. But, because you do have such a low opinion of women, I think at this time, it probably is better for you to refrain from dating and relationships.


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## HAL (May 10, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> you...came to my chat...to tell me...im annoying you...when i dignified you with a response...
> 
> just because certain types of people throw a hissy fit every time someone proves them wrong in an argument doesnt mean you get to start making ad hominem attacks....i suggest you take your big brain and think more about the actual debate than making personal attacks at people you CHOSE to speak to just because they disagree
> 
> ...


???

Literally every single one of your replies to me has been sarcastic or passive aggressive, wtf do you expect? My first three responses in this thread were reasoned and thoughtful, I even agreed with you at an earlier point. And now you tell me I'm just being a big old meanie because I got sick of your childish tone? Please.

You're either in a very bad mood, are young, or this is your first time using an internet forum.

Good luck all the same, but I think you need to stop treating this thread like it's a battle ground against everyone who dares to write anything. I didn't even say anything aggressive until you came back for a _third_ time with a weird sarcastic passive-aggressive response. Sort your etiquette out man. And I have no idea why you're bringing up race and country of origin, wtf???


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## Rift (Mar 12, 2012)

MoStoner12 said:


> if you think the need to talk about your feelings with someone you trust or care about means you have low self esteem? then im not the one that needs help





MoStoner12 said:


> My whole life I thought, "let me become attractive so one day at least one girl will love me how I want".


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

I give my partner emotional support, so your argument is invalid. Me and plenty of women of course, you can find many touching stories of people in bad places and how their partner supported them, the internet is full of them. Perhaps you should reflect a bit on how your relationships work in general, and what kind of people you attract, to maybe understand why this keeps happening to you.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Whatexists said:


> Yeah, plenty of reasons: Intimacy. Companionship. An ally in building a life. Maybe a sexual partner. Emotional support.
> 
> I grew up with a similar thought to wanting to find out how to get women to love me _the way I want_. And yeah, that isn't how love works. Because "the way I want" is fundamentally self-involved and controlling. It's the type of seemingly innocent worldview that would lead to controlling behavior, or (as seems to have happened in your case) get broken.
> 
> ...


you can say that. it sounds lovely but i dont vibe with it...: Intimacy. Companionship. An ally in building a life are all things you can do with friends..even a business partner...

sexual partner and Emotional support are literally two of the only three things i have on my list of requirements. 

you can have that view that you should just accept any way a woman wants to love you but thats not for me. you can say "the way i want" as many times as you want. but the fundamental reason you enter a relationship is because they give you what you want. yes. you. the individual...has wants and needs. if you dont want to satisfy your wants and needs then just date anyone or become a submissive. i dont judge. whatever youre into. but most of us want specific things if we want to invest all our time money and effort into something. you want dont WANT anything? good for you

i know exactly what i want 

you mean hypermagous women...dont have certain strict and selective criteria on who they let in their vagina...i dont know what universe youre living in bro...women dont just love freely like that

listen..i dont know who needs to tell you this... but women like a man whos in control....what do you think that means control of...the Tv remote? 
if you dont take what you want shes not just going to give it to you...what movies are basing your theories off? (no im not talking about rape before any sensitive feelers jump to ridiculous conclusions, i mean assertiveness) 

i dont try to control anyone or anything. do you people not know how entps operate?

good for you and your relationships...makes me so happy youre happy...really...thats great...
well i never thought about myself and never got what i wanted until i put my foot down and decided i wont be messed with...but im glad you think your experiences can be applied universally. i have had a lot of female friends in my life. relationships are different

i dunno who taught you about love but the way it works is "you give me what i want, i give you what you want" and everyone is happy. if youve somehow found a way to get long term relationships where no one ever says what they want...then teach us bro


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## Ewok City (Sep 21, 2020)

NO WOMAN WANTS TO GIVE MEN EMOTIONAL SUPPORT. >> Nope. Have you checked whether you've been talking to the mature ones?

Edit: IS THERE ANY POINT IN WANTING A RELATIONSHIP WITH ONE? >> didn't see that phrase there. My bad. 

IS THERE ANY POINT IN WANTING A RELATIONSHIP WITH ONE? >> Nope, there's no point asking about "what could I get from a relationship." Relationship should be about wanting to share, not looking for something to get.


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## Rift (Mar 12, 2012)

Electra said:


> Unfortunetly the videoes were blocked in my country it said 🙁
> But I agree, I think he should get a great male father figure. 🙂


ah, my apologies. . . it was mostly my usual distracting vids. 

only one was more on point. . . which showcased several men and women discussing the conflicts associated with the expression of male vulnerability.

the more poignant line from one of the lasses which could be paraphrased as that women are given information on how to deal with men as a potential threat but not as a human being. . . as well as another woman describing how this type of vulnerability for both men and women needs to be informative and addressed ahead of time as one might with a medical or mental health condition rather than as a consequence or afterthought of a negative interaction. . . that the biggest conflict isn't within being vulnerable but rather the timing of when it's shared... 


and guess ultimately the gist of the vid could be summed up in the stereotypes of women doing it too soon and men doing it too late... and how when the roles are reversed, that yes, the attraction factor tends to wane because if it's something they recognize as a pattern within their own sex it becomes masculinized/feminized and that attribute can affect sexual attraction among partners of the opposite sex. . . that everything, like this thread, are problems of communication rather than the actual subject matter -- and the subject matter which because of the communication problems becomes oversimplified and sends out more mixed messages because of hte lack of a finite definition.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

eeo said:


> They were not able to or didn't want to consider your needs and give you what you needed at that moment. Not everybody is well equipped to deal with who they think is a high-maintenance person (not saying that you are for sure, they just might have seen it like that because they either didn't know how or didn't want to deal with negative things in the relationship). Not all women are like that, so you should analyze this only as an issue with these particular persons, and not as a general issue with women.
> 
> It could be helpful to analyze yourself and try to find better ways to deal with things that make you negative and frustrated so you could diffuse the intensity of these feelings before you turn to your partner for emotional support. Needing emotional support from your partner, talking about things and venting when necessary is a completely natural thing in a relationship. There might just be a fine line between becoming too intense or needy without realizing it, or expecting more from your partner than they can handle. This is where they'll start looking for ways to get out of this situation. There's only so much a person can handle before it starts affecting them negatively, and that goes for both parties in the relationship.
> 
> ...


im in fact too low maintenance. i ask little and require little. even this ^ was never an issue for me until i look back and realised it was an issue. after watching a few youtube videos and reading some articles ive seen its very common for women to hate dealing with their man when he is sad. its not just me. so i have lost hope of ever finding that. unless someone can convince me otherwise...im just going to use women for sex then marry a 21 year old when im 30 at this rate....

its always "not all women" but never any evidence to counter the "not all women"

women know how to deal with emotions, they just dont look for that in a mate, having to deal his sadness. ever. its seen as weakness

im not going to go to my lady like, "i stubbed my toe, can i cry to you". if im upset about something its going to be deep and intense sometimes...same with her...women always have these super sad stories

if we all want the love we didnt receive as children. people who didnt receive emotional support as children will need it from their partners, especially because they will be independent about everything else. i cant change who i am to want something else 
my point is any form of negative emotions of sadness are seen as needy by all women. i dont think that ever changes. due to their biologic response for most to act to nurture others in some way when met with any form of distress

at a certain point. if you date all different types of women you realise the issue is with yourself. i happen to have need that cant be met in romantic relationship. other more healthy men dont need that but need other things. its just so happens that something i thought i would find one day doesnt even exist

i dont think so, ive never seen or heard of women ever being able to provide emotional support for men with traumatized childhoods. maybe therapy is good. but if you cant say what you feel to your partner and therapist then you might as well not have a partner if what you want is someone who listens without judgements. 

in general you can get most women the exact same way once you crack the code

no no. if the common theme is women dont like men who are sad. i am flawed. not them. no one is perfect. but i can have certain attributes not conducive to strong emotional connections. because i didnt have the happiest life growing up and im not the most positive. but i shouldnt have to force myself to be positive all the time and the one time i open up then im seen as inferior


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

HAL said:


> ???
> 
> Literally every single one of your replies to me has been sarcastic or passive aggressive, wtf do you expect? My first three responses in this thread were reasoned and thoughtful, I even agreed with you at an earlier point. And now you tell me I'm just being a big old meanie because I got sick of your childish tone? Please.
> 
> ...


the reason i brought up certain races and countries is because certain types of people like to forget they come from murdering imperialists and colonizers with death tolls impossible to count. and sometimes the aggression jumps out and they go into their primal attack mode and deny their nature under the usual line "but the germans...indians and Australians...dunno what youre talking about mate, wasnt me...that was 3 billion years ago...." so i have to remind you control your natural impulses...but i never said any names of anything...

if youre gonna cry because someone is "passive aggressive" and not actually argue the point because you dont have anything good to add then i suggest not interacting with entps....

all i hear is "ad hominem....ad hominem..ad hominem..ad hominem.." 

if i wanted to hear, "you know what i think the problem is? you, its just you mate, no one likes what youre saying" i would go start discussing race at my local pubs 

i asked a question. im an entp. people got mad....its just what happens. im not soft. im going to defend what i say. you dont have to reply


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## HAL (May 10, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> the reason i brought up certain races and countries is because certain types of people like to forget they come from murdering imperialists and colonizers with death tolls impossible to count.
> 
> .....
> 
> if i wanted to hear, "you know what i think the problem is? you, its just you mate, no one likes what youre saying" i would go start discussing race at my local pubs


lol and here was me thinking this thread was about women and how you think they're all the same 🤷‍♂️


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Ewok City said:


> NO WOMAN WANTS TO GIVE MEN EMOTIONAL SUPPORT. >> Nope. Have you checked whether you've been talking to the mature ones?
> 
> Edit: IS THERE ANY POINT IN WANTING A RELATIONSHIP WITH ONE? >> didn't see that phrase there. My bad.
> 
> IS THERE ANY POINT IN WANTING A RELATIONSHIP WITH ONE? >> Nope, there's no point asking about "what could I get from a relationship." Relationship should be about wanting to share, not looking for something to get.


thats the point...i want to share my pain sometimes...not all the time...but sometimes i want to. but what my point is, is that once you show weakness to a woman she loses respect for you....and to me, thats important


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

HAL said:


> lol and here was me thinking this thread was about women and how you think they're all the same 🤷‍♂️


do i also think certain people from certain heritages and certain classes of certain intellects are all the same...no...but as soon as you start dropping f bombs im going to start to make assumptions....


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## eeo (Aug 25, 2020)

MoStoner12 said:


> women know how to deal with emotions, they just dont look for that in a mate, having to deal his sadness. ever. its seen as weakness


Women are not necessarily better at dealing with emotions than men. Nobody really wants to deal with negative things, but mature people understand it's just something that needs to be done in life. So, good relationships have all those things and both parties commit to dealing with the positives and the negatives. It's all mutual give and take.

I'd still say that you're hanging out with the wrong crowd and looking for the things you need in places where they might never be found. It could very well be both them and you where the fault lies. But it's important to figure out whether you're really looking for solutions or are just trying to find things to support your beliefs. One is helpful, the other not so much.


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## HAL (May 10, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> do i also think certain people from certain heritages and certain classes of certain intellects are all the same...no...but as soon as you start dropping f bombs im going to start to make assumptions....


I feel like you're derailing you're own thread here. It's pretty weird.

And now you're hinting at something to do with my race because I "dropped an F bomb" ??

lol. This is just bizarre.


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## Ewok City (Sep 21, 2020)

MoStoner12 said:


> but what my point is, is that once you show weakness to a woman she loses respect for you....and to me, thats important


Then she's not the right one. Or maybe she felt that she herself hasn't been accepted either. Why bother then?


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## Nannerl (Jan 6, 2021)

MoStoner12 said:


> if i have a bad day, and turn to my girlfriend and say "i had a bad day because _x,y,z_..... she is automatically going to lose respect for me and start thinking about other men she deems to be "stronger"


More like that's your fear. 

I mean, sure, there are stereotypes, but exactly because people like you keep supporting them. «Women are this, women expect that». For real? Isn't it time to drop this already?


MoStoner12 said:


> they dont expect men to always be strong but they expect them to always act strong and never talk about their pain.


Wrong. 
Simply stop saying "they", as if all women were the same. Women as in me? As in my best friend? As in my friends? We love men who open up and give us trust; you know, like real humans with a brain who don't buy on the “alpha” bullshit, but I'm just starting to think the anger you have built up against the stereotype version of a female (and your own insecurity about opening up) is probably _the_ problem.

Can't you just consider that maybe, just pretty damn likely, you keep choosing the wrong women?


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> well your thought is incorrect. they dont expect men to always be strong but they expect them to always act strong and never talk about their pain.
> hmmm what does your boyfriend or husband talk about with you?
> no, men understand that the purpose of our friendships is to escape our issues, very rarely do men discuss emotions because we have other things we do together to escape them
> 
> i thought thats what a girlfriend or wife was for. to listen when youre sad without judgement. it is categorically not the case


Having men in my family I love when they open up, its not easy to guess what they feel, and be supportive like that. I have for a long time wished that that stupid old tradition with men having to be the strong, silent ones would go away! Its not doing anyone any good! Its is just incredibly annoying for everyone, maybe except from a few old fashioned people who actually like that shit. Prove me wrong if you want!

Its kinda like the tradition that females should keep long hair and stay in the kitchen. SAYS WHO?- Said a guy from 1397 🙄
Does that count in 2021?


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

tanstaafl28 said:


> You are either stirring the pot for a reaction or even far more deluded than the OP (at least he woke up from his delusion).
> 
> If you can't or won't see a woman as your equal partner and not your servant, then you don't deserve one. Men and women compliment one other. Each gives to the other in equal measure. Each has their own strengths and weaknesses and when they work together, they are a unit of magnitude greater for their efforts. The point of any partnership is learning to transcend what either individual could do separately. You become more together. Women in Europe and the US are fully aware of their potential, and most won't let men like you get away with treating them as servants. They have higher expectations, and you can't meet them.


nah...

men dont need women, how do women make mens life better? im genuinely interested because ive never heard a reason...


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Electra said:


> Well obviously noone should stay in a violent, abusive or cheating relationship, or at that point it isn't even a relationship anymore, its just human slavery.
> A relationship is equal.


its not equal....how is it equal? can you give a list of the benefits and drawbacks for both men and women?

you said "unconditional"...you didnt mean it though. i guess in your fantasy world every relationship is perfect


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Electra said:


> The dogs may bark but the caravan moves on...


okay The Riddler


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Electra said:


> Having men in my family I love when they open up, its not easy to guess what they feel, and be supportive like that. I have for a long time wished that that stupid old tradition with men having to be the strong, silent ones would go away! Its not doing anyone any good! Its is just incredibly annoying for everyone, maybe except from a few old fashioned people who actually like that shit. Prove me wrong if you want!
> 
> Its kinda like the tradition that females should keep long hair and stay in the kitchen. SAYS WHO?- Said a guy from 1397 🙄
> Does that count in 2021?


females that have pretty long hair and can cook a good meal were popular in 2021 BC and are popular in 2021 AD. 

family is different. i wouldnt know because im not close to mine. but i assume it not the same as a relationship with your partner. men dont like to talk about feelings...you can wish what you want. we are not annoyed we dont have to talk about our feelings. the chemical makeup of our brains means we dont get the same satisfaction from talking about our feelings as women do. so theres no point. not everything is just "society and tradition". some things are natural.


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## littlewyng (Sep 17, 2020)

MoStoner12 said:


> men dont need women, how do women make mens life better?


You are so right, we don't have any benefit to men whatsoever, and you should completely stay clear of women going forward.


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

MoStoner12 said:


> you can talk all the wishy washy, lovey dovey, purpose stuff. but in reality 40% of marriages end in divorce. 60% of second marriages end in divorce. 75% of third marriages end in divorce.you guys espousing all this crazy "the relationship is not about your needs" stuff are actually sending me in a loop...LOL
> my head is a spin cycle right now
> 
> me:"i want to feel heard and understood when you im sad"
> ...


I'm not talking fairy tales. I'm one of those divorcees. I was with the same woman for 20 years and I thought I knew her well. We fucked up our 15 year marriage because we didn't understand what we were doing. We had no clue. That's why I say it is supposed to be _striving towards a transcendental experience_. Something that enhances what you alone could want or achieve. You're suppose to learn and grow together. That's what we didn't do. We grew apart and learned nothing. We both dove into the marriage head first with highly unrealistic expectations. I tried to set realistic boundaries: My life, her life, our life. It didn't work. She was a workaholic who took little pleasure in activities that did not advance her financial security in some way. Once and a while I could get her to relax. We took trips to Europe and she brought her laptop and insisted on working one of her 4 side jobs WHILE ON VACATION. My ex wife was raised by a mother who taught her that love was conditional and transactional. Her greatest fears were being destitute and fat. I accepted that understanding from her and never questioned it.

So trust me when I say I'm not talking fairy tales. I'm talking you strive towards a mutual experience where the two of you become partners in crime. You work together towards goals you set together. You support each other. You prop each other up. You indulge them as much as you can, and they do the same for you. It is a two-way street where both of you give back as much as you take. Sometimes you'll need more and she'll give more. Sometimes she'll need more and you give more, but it all balances out in the end. I have watched my mom and step-dad do it for nearly 40 years.

I don't want someone to spend all my time together. That's unrealistic and stifling, but I want to know she's got my back through thick and thin and she knows I've got hers.

Maybe I am a foolish hopeless romantic, but I think this sums it up pretty well:


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Nannerl said:


> More like that's your fear.
> 
> I mean, sure, there are stereotypes, but exactly because people like you keep supporting them. «Women are this, women expect that». For real? Isn't it time to drop this already?
> 
> ...


the "stereotypes keep persisting because of your belief in them" and not from observations about personal experience that support the common consensus is the same logic as when white people tell me "racism continues because black people make everything about race"
really bro....
we going with that logic????

well i brought up how i feel, and you told me to drop it...ill drop it when you actually have something useful to say instead of saying the stereotype you just displayed doesnt exist...

i have been with and know a lot of women. unless youre one those intps that likes to be a social butterfly i dont think you have more experience with people than me...if all you and your friends boyfriends suddenly turned round and started talking about their days and complaining when they felt down, all you and your friends would come together and start looking for new boyfriends 

i have literally not said i am angry at women once. not a single time. can we not misconstrue my position in order to make points to argue that i never brought up. see.i said im sad and you start talking all this "alpha, angry" stuff which i never said. thank you for proving my points for me. women have the inabilty to deal with negative male emotion. and will go to every place apart from "i get you, i understand youre hurt, its fine" and also actually mean it 

you talk a lot smack about what its like to be a guy for someone whos not a guy....


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Ewok City said:


> Then she's not the right one. Or maybe she felt that she herself hasn't been accepted either. Why bother then?


all of them? i dont think so....

sometimes you have accept reality. im a sad boy on the inside and women just dont dig that


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

MoStoner12 said:


> nah...
> 
> men dont need women, how do women make mens life better? im genuinely interested because ive never heard a reason...


Did a woman do you wrong? My life has always been better sharing it with a woman. They add mystery and relieve loneliness. Someone to share with and enjoy company. A sexy friend who wants to sleep with me and wake up with me and helps me see things differently than I would by myself. A unique perspective you can't get anywhere else. Maybe you'll just be fine with a dog.


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## littlewyng (Sep 17, 2020)

As long as it's a male dog.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

eeo said:


> Women are not necessarily better at dealing with emotions than men. Nobody really wants to deal with negative things, but mature people understand it's just something that needs to be done in life. So, good relationships have all those things and both parties commit to dealing with the positives and the negatives. It's all mutual give and take.
> 
> I'd still say that you're hanging out with the wrong crowd and looking for the things you need in places where they might never be found. It could very well be both them and you where the fault lies. But it's important to figure out whether you're really looking for solutions or are just trying to find things to support your beliefs. One is helpful, the other not so much.


women live life in perpetual state of fear, or so ive been told. therefore they learn to cope with this and have women and male friends and family always willing and ready to talk to them about anything for the most part. some women dont like to talk and some have no one to talk to....but thats rare...

there is rarely a day in relationship a man doesnt have to listen to his lady complain. maybe im just the unlucky one though 

ive literally dated women of every race (apart from far eastern) in different cities with completely different interests (same 3/4 interest do arise but im not going to date women i have nothing in common with). yeah, i know i am a broken human and women dont want to deal with that...i have no issues admitting that. im just sad ill never be able to share it and that it was sharing it in the past that ruined my relationships. it is what it is. but i can still feel it for a little bit. 

i dont think there are any solutions. i dunno. im an entp, instead of dealing with my emotions i will debate them. whatever the outcome is i dont really care...i dont have a J at the end, i never really know what the purpose of my actions is


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

MoStoner12 said:


> My whole life I thought, "let me become attractive so one day at least one girl will love me how I want". But I have recently found out that wish was a myth...anyone found a purpose in dating women that makes them happy? I dont too much care about good looks or external validation from my peers, that other people like.
> 
> I dunno, I guess the realization is overwhelmingly depressing and this is my last attempt at hope. Does this mean I am destined to feel alone forever?


If you fail to find an acceptable mate, you have three options.

1. Lower your standards. Women who are highly attractive to look are often arrogant because they are used to receiving a lot of attention from men. Thus they may demand more from a relationship than you are willing to give. Alas, English women who are both good looking and humble are rarer than unicorns.
2. Change your environment. This is what I would personally recommend. From what I've read about you, I think you'd be more likely to get a girlfriend if you lived in a large city with a more diverse population. You should consider the possibility of moving outside of Europe as well.
3. Stay single. People have a tendency to only see the negatives in a single life. However, there are a number of advantages, such as more freedom to do what you want and less financial strain. Despite what Hollywood romances suggest, a relationship won't necessarily make you any happier than you are now.


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> its not equal....how is it equal? can you give a list of the benefits and drawbacks for both men and women?
> 
> you said "unconditional"...you didnt mean it though. i guess in your fantasy world every relationship is perfect


Equal as in equal rights.
No relationship is perfect.


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> okay The Riddler


I heard it from Helen Fisher


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> females that have pretty long hair and can cook a good meal were popular in 2021 BC and are popular in 2021 AD.
> 
> family is different. i wouldnt know because im not close to mine. but i assume it not the same as a relationship with your partner. men dont like to talk about feelings...you can wish what you want. we are not annoyed we dont have to talk about our feelings. the chemical makeup of our brains means we dont get the same satisfaction from talking about our feelings as women do. so theres no point. not everything is just "society and tradition". some things are natural.


So are men with long hair that can cook a meal


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

@MoStoner12 I hear @ENFPathetic is looking for a housewife. Maybe if you clean house for him, he'll let you tell him your feelings.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

HAL said:


> I feel like you're derailing you're own thread here. It's pretty weird.
> 
> And now you're hinting at something to do with my race because I "dropped an F bomb" ??
> 
> lol. This is just bizarre.


you wouldnt know anything about racism though would you...

you think you cant derive plenty about a person by the way they speak?...then again....introvert...

youre the one who wanted to argue ad hominem...if you want to play dirty, ill get in the mud with the pigs....i dont care


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> females that have pretty long hair and can cook a good meal were popular in 2021 BC and are popular in 2021 AD.
> 
> family is different. i wouldnt know because im not close to mine. but i assume it not the same as a relationship with your partner. men dont like to talk about feelings...you can wish what you want. we are not annoyed we dont have to talk about our feelings. the chemical makeup of our brains means we dont get the same satisfaction from talking about our feelings as women do. so theres no point. not everything is just "society and tradition". some things are natural.


Yeah well in my country this is starting to change. And the brain is plastic and DNA change over time after popular demand.
Oh wait. I thought you wanted to talk about your feelings and now you said youre not annoyed that you don't have to talk about your feelings? 🤔
I guess we will have resort to clairvoyance.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

littlewyng said:


> You are so right, we don't have any benefit to men whatsoever, and you should completely stay clear of women going forward.


i do for the most part, they always stare at me though. i want to know why....


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

MoStoner12 said:


> i do for the most part, they always stare at me though. i want to know why....


Only one way to find out. Ask them.


* *




Maybe you're afraid of the answer?


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## Electra (Oct 24, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> i know lots of girls who think long hair is feminine and prefer short...but maybe youre right...i dont care


Good for you


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

tanstaafl28 said:


> @MoStoner12 I hear @ENFPathetic is looking for a housewife. Maybe if you clean house for him, he'll let you tell him your feelings.


You were so right, the rest of us did not really stand a chance at winning op over


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## ENFPathetic (Apr 3, 2018)

tanstaafl28 said:


> @MoStoner12 I hear @ENFPathetic is looking for a housewife. Maybe if you clean house for him, he'll let you tell him your feelings.


Hey if you'll clean for me, I'll pretend to listen to just about anything.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

ENFPathetic said:


> Hey if you'll clean for me, I'll pretend to listen to just about anything.


You guys are made for each other


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

As for the original complaint - that women are not emotionally supportive enough - well no shit, what else did you expect?!? Most women are quite passive, insecure and emotionally reactive. Someone with these personality traits will crave comfort and be frightened by any instability, so it is unreasonable to expect much initiative from them in life or love. If you want a robust, low-drama companion, I'd advise you to look for a less "traditional" woman, who will likely have a more masculine personality.

Otherwise, you are best to look elsewhere for emotional validation, and I think you would be far happier if you found some other men to discuss your frustrations with. One of the tragedies of modern life is the lack of gentlemen's clubs, guilds and adventuring parties, as these provided opportunities for men to learn from each other, enjoy life and grow as a team. Perhaps a more feasible solution is to learn how to transmute your sexual desires into music, poetry and visual art. That is the approach I have chosen to take, and it has made my life much easier. The less you expect to receive from women, the happier you will be.


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

Every time I think this thread might be getting close to redeeming itself, someone comes in and drops another turd bomb....


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## BenevolentBitterBleeding (Mar 16, 2015)

Just build a relationship where money is no object with a female therapist of your choosing. Bam, problem solved.


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

tanstaafl28 said:


> Every time I think this thread might be getting close to redeeming itself, someone comes in and drops another turd bomb....


lmao the parts about having guy friends and doing artsy stuff were good advice at least


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## mia-me (Feb 5, 2021)

tanstaafl28 said:


> Every time I think this thread might be getting close to redeeming itself, someone comes in and drops another turd bomb....


That's cause it's a honeypot thread.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

DOGSOUP said:


> lmao the parts about having guy friends and doing artsy stuff were good advice at least


I am a nationalist, not a religious conservative, and I don't fetishize docility in women at all. My point to OP was that it's naive to expect a submissive, reactive, insecure girl (most "tradwives" and "ladies" fall squarely into this category) to be able to comfort him and give him sexual pleasure. OP can either choose a more assertive type of girl, or accept that he'll need to find some other outlets for emotional support.

The other point I made, to Electra, is that legal equality means women are expected to show more initiative in romance, in the workforce and in society more generally - but I don't see many women who are eager to take on this responsibility. Perhaps they would prefer to live under a patriarchy?


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## tanstaafl28 (Sep 10, 2012)

mia-me said:


> That's cause it's a honeypot thread.


You know you're one of my favorites around here, right (Along with @littlewyng of course).


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## littlewyng (Sep 17, 2020)




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## Nannerl (Jan 6, 2021)

I think you misinterpreted what I said.


MoStoner12 said:


> instead of saying the stereotype you just displayed doesnt exist


I'm saying that it is a stereotype exactly, not that it doesn't exist. What I said it's that it is an oversimplified, full of prejudices and _generalizing_ view that distort reality (the exact definition of “stereotype”). 

You are supporting those standards by placing all women under the same perception: “they don't want to hear”, they _who_? I'm telling you that's not true and then you tell me I'm wrong... because I'm a woman? Honestly, who are you to tell me how I feel towards men, again? 



MoStoner12 said:


> i have literally not said i am angry at women


Nope, I said it. It's quite evident, in my perception (you're asking for opinions, aren't you?). It could be just you expressing your sadness and frustration with your ex-girlfriends, sure, but bro, we're not them, chill. It's understandable, but again, why are you blaming it on _all _women? On me? You don't know me at all, or my friends for that matter, but here you're imposing your assumptions. 


MoStoner12 said:


> "alpha, angry" stuff which i never said


Again, I never said you said it. By “alpha bullshit” I'm referring to the _stereotype_ of a man, which translates into men like you not being able to express their emotions, because there's a social pressure on them to be “strong”. I said not everyone buys that; I don't and many friends don't, because it's not a general truth, it's a stereotype, and we need to break free from it — that's why I said “drop it”. We need to stop saying things like “men are...”, “women are...”. It's false and damaging. 


MoStoner12 said:


> thank you for proving my points for me


See? Agressive. Was that needed? Couldn't you simply ask me to rephrase? 


MoStoner12 said:


> i dont think you have more experience with people than me...if all you and your friends boyfriends suddenly turned round and started talking about their days and complaining when they felt down, all you and your friends would come together and start looking for new boyfriends


... So I'm wrong because I'm an INTP? I won't take it personal because it simply doesn't make sense, lol. All I can say is no, I have had experience with people, but most importantly, I am a woman — that gender you're referring to, no? I have never ditched a guy because he opened up to me, I like that, I like knowing people, and my friends have dated _pretty_ sensitive men. Maybe you just need girls who are more aware about the origin of gender roles and social constructivism, but again, not all women are the same, just like not all men are the same... right? Or are you all playboys? No. 

Honestly, I think you can come off as a very arrogant person. If you treat those girls how you're treating nearly everyone on this thread... yikes. I think you're pretty sure about what you think, thus, I really don't understand why you asked this on the first place. You don't seem like you're open to other views. 

If you really think you figured it out and we women are all like you say (even when we're telling you some are not), then yeah, just stay single.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

Nannerl said:


> I think you misinterpreted what I said.
> 
> Again, I never said you said it. By “alpha bullshit” I'm referring to the _stereotype_ of a man, which translates into men like you not being able to express their emotions, because there's a social pressure on them to be “strong”. I said not everyone buys that; I don't and many friends don't, because it's not a general truth, it's a stereotype, and we need to break free from it — that's why I said “drop it”. We need to stop saying things like “men are...”, “women are...”. It's false and damaging.


Actually, the stereotypical "alpha man" portrayed in media is quite emotionally volatile and impulsive. He is often an outlaw or vigilante, lacks discipline and may have few if any long-term goals that could direct his energy productively. He actually represents the most destructive aspect of masculinity - the part which acts entirely on instinct and is indifferent to reason, let alone emotional refinement. Women who lust after a man like this should be very careful what they wish for.


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## Dezir (Nov 25, 2013)

MoStoner12 said:


> My whole life I thought, "let me become attractive so one day at least one girl will love me how I want". But I have recently found out that wish was a myth...anyone found a purpose in dating women that makes them happy? I dont too much care about good looks or external validation from my peers, that other people like.
> 
> I dunno, I guess the realization is overwhelmingly depressing and this is my last attempt at hope. Does this mean I am destined to feel alone forever?


I know someone who has problems in dating because he takes the alpha male macho man approach. It may work for some people, the people who are less about connecting with the other person and more about relationships based on shallow reasons such as looks or physically strength. It may work for some people, but given your frustration that you don't get emotional support, I don't think you are one of them.

I think a relationship where you are able to understand the other person and to be connected with the other person is a lot more rewarding, to build raport. A relationship based on empathy and care. A relationship based on mutual help for one another.

I really like this guy, he's a nice guy, but he seems to have a completely different attitude towards men than he has towards women. We had a recent conversation, eventually, after many many failed attempts, I told that person: bro, you know what's your problem? and I'm saying this to help you not out of meanness, you don't understand how a person is feeling, actually. To understand a person you have to understand how a person is feeling. You have to feel the person.

Then I told him: It's very clear that that girl didn't want anything from you, she just wanted to have fun, to laugh a bit, but you didn't realize it. But since you don't feel the person, obviously you insist when it's dead obvious when you have nothing to insist upon.

The discussion further went something like this: Bro, be nice, try to be nice when you're talking to them. Stop being arrogant or using pick-up lines and so on. You told me that you're speaking normally to them, but that's not normal, do you talk to me or to someone else like that as well?

Have you ever considered that it doesn't work precisely because you force yourself too much? that you want too much to look good and end up looking arrogant? Your approach, even if in normally you may not be at all like that, seems very arrogant.

Girls don't like arrogance. You can be arrogant after they get to know you, in a non-serious way, as a joke, when you're joking with each other, but not before. If they see you as arrogant from the beginning they will simply believe that you are an arrogant.

Be normal, be modest, don't flex yourself, don't brag, don't see yourself above others. If you want them to talk to you they have to feel good with you, women are not dumb, like _"you use a pick-up line"_ and that's it. And beside feeling good with you, they have to see that you have an okay character. As a human, they have to get to know you as a human.

I think it goes without saying that you should be treating them nicely. Don't treat them with lack of respect, take into account how they feel. You probably want a relationship with someone who loves you very much, women want the same thing, someone who loves them very much. Someone who would do a lot for them and with whom they can feel appreciated.

And one more thing, judge people's character individually. Don't judge people as a whole. If you had badluck in relationship that doesn't mean _"women are ..."_, judge their character individually, not as a whole to make an average. Maybe some women you've met didn't only want attention, but they are disgusted by your arrogant approach, and they just play with you for a whole, that's where you might get the wrong impression that they only want attention. I'm not saying that was the case for all of them, but I think there were cases where this was the truth.

And you tend to exaggerate when it comes to teasing. That time you said _"I have a curisoity, are you having botox lips?"_ is nasty for 2 reasons: first the curisoity, second you were a jerk. It's not nice to ask such a thing, even as a joke.

It's not nice to ask such a thing even when you know the person, let alone from a stranger. Think about how they feel. Regardless of whether they are natural or with botox, it's still not a nice thing to ask. When you make fun of someone, there is a level of jerkiness, but that level of jerkiness matters, when someone is teasing you, it's nasty but not awful.

To ask her whether she has botox lips or not is like her asking you whether you are bald or not. It upsets them regardless of whether or not it's a joke. Don't make people feel bad. Maybe you can take such jokes, but not everyone can take them. And when you don't know a person it's better to play it safe.

I don't know if or in what measure this can help you. A lot of people already told you about that a genuine relationship is supposed to be based on care, on taking care of the other person. This goes both ways. Someone who genuinely loves you, loves you for more than looks, he loves you for the person you are and cares for you.

You had many relationships and are apparently able to attract many women, but never had any intimacy. Someone who likes you is interested in the person you are. What you like, what you dislike, what you fear, what you hope, your dreams, your aspirations, your regrets.

Also, I have noticed in your replies that you have a predisposition towards anger, given your frustration _(and I'm not saying that to diss you, be passive aggressive or in a judgemental way)_ it's understandable, but that doesn't mean everyone will understand it. This is just a forum, what you do here has no consequences, we are strangers and will likely never see each other in our lives, but what you do in the real world has consequences.


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## Nannerl (Jan 6, 2021)

Meliodas said:


> Actually, the stereotypical "alpha man" portrayed in media is quite emotionally volatile and impulsive. He is often an outlaw or vigilante, lacks discipline and may have few if any long-term goals that could direct his energy productively. He actually represents the most primitive, crude form of masculinity, which is pure physical instinct indifferent to rationality and refinement. Women who lust after a man like this should be very careful what they wish for.


I agree, and this stereotype of an “alpha” is also the foundation of many expectations imposed on men: being the dominant one in a relationship or in a social setting, eat the “sheeps” on the workplace, always having the last word, etc. It's completely stupid... and damaging.


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## Meliodas (Nov 16, 2016)

Nannerl said:


> I agree, and this stereotype of an “alpha” is also the foundation of many expectations imposed on men: being the dominant one in a relationship or in a social setting, eat the “sheeps” on the workplace, always having the last word, etc. It's completely stupid... and damaging.


Then you might be surprised to learn that this stereotype is not very traditional. The burly warrior-in-service-of-his-lady trope only began to be taken seriously in the 19th century, when scholars began to dig up chivalric romances from the Middle Ages. Unfortunately, the parodistic and ironic nature of these works was ignored and people took them literally.

Throughout Antiquity, most depictions of masculinity emphasized the need for balance between the humors, of which fiery passion was only one among several others. Men who acted on instinct alone were considered to have too much yellow bile, which made them "choleric" or volatile. Herbs that supported an imbalance in this humor tended to have bitter qualities (think arugula or spinach), and it was believed that they cooled and detoxified the body.


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## katzurada (Mar 21, 2021)

MoStoner12 said:


> My whole life I thought, "let me become attractive so one day at least one girl will love me how I want". But I have recently found out that wish was a myth...anyone found a purpose in dating women that makes them happy? I dont too much care about good looks or external validation from my peers, that other people like.
> 
> I dunno, I guess the realization is overwhelmingly depressing and this is my last attempt at hope. Does this mean I am destined to feel alone forever?


Give them food. It works every time.


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## Penny (Mar 24, 2016)

MoStoner12 said:


> the fact is, if i have a bad day, and turn to my girlfriend and say "i had a bad day because _x,y,z_..... she is automatically going to lose respect for me and start thinking about other men she deems to be "stronger". when in reality it is stronger to be open than to be closed off about your emotions...
> 
> i really dont understand what is unclear. i guess love looks different to everyone. but i thought the ability to talk about your problems was a basic requirement for a successful relationship...but 40% of marriages end in divorce and half of the others that stay are miserable...
> 
> ...


how are you supposed to get the emotional support you want if you dont let her know you need it? if you act like nothing is wrong then how will she know anything is wrong? if you open up and she turns away then maybe it just means she's not what you need or want.


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## Whatexists (Jul 26, 2015)

MoStoner12 said:


> i dunno who taught you about love but the way it works is "you give me what i want, i give you what you want" and everyone is happy.


That's called a business exchange. Not love. Love isn't about getting what you want from people. At the _very least _love involves caring about and feeling affection for the other person. And if you don't want to help or take care of or support someone without an expectation of repayment you do not care about them. You might care about things they do for you, but you don't care about them, so you can't be said to love them (well someone _could _say that you love them but they'd be literally wrong.)

"Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now." - Fred Rogers
"Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love." - Lao Tsu
"Spread love everywhere: let no one ever come to you without leaving happier." - Mother Teresa
"But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;..." - Jesus Christ

I mean I've read a _lot_ of philosophical and religious and poetical and scientific stuff about love and never once have I seen a credible source say that it's a transactional relationship. In my personal experience getting past the relationship being transactional is the first step towards real intimacy and real love. And that involves loving the other person for who they are.


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## Fru2 (Aug 21, 2018)

*We’ve all been taught the horror’s of the African slave trade. It’s in all the school books and in plenty of Hollywood movies and has been shoved down our throats since Obama took office. But for some reason the largest group of slaves in the British Colonies in the 17th Century doesn’t get mentioned at all- the Irish.*








The Irish Slave Trade: The Forgotten WHITE Slaves…


IRISH: THE FORGOTTEN WHITE SLAVES – We’ve all been taught the horror’s of the African slave trade. It’s in all the school books and in plenty of Hollywood movies and has been shoved down our throats since Obama took office. But for some reason the largest group of slaves in the British Colonies...




truthuncensored.net




"From 1641 to 1652, over 500,000 Irish were killed by the English and another 300,000 were sold as slaves. Ireland’s population fell from about 1,500,000 to 600,000 in one single decade. "
*"African slaves were very expensive during the late 1600s (£50 Sterling). Irish slaves came cheap (no more than £5 Sterling).* If a planter whipped, branded or beat an Irish slave to death, it was never a crime. A death was a monetary setback, but far cheaper than killing a more expensive African."


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## DOGSOUP (Jan 29, 2016)

MoStoner12 said:


> of course im not going to like the people PUTTING PEOPLE IN CONCENTRATION CAMPS AND COLONIZING MY CONTINENT...WHAT PART OF THAT IS NOT COMPUTING IN YOUR BRAIN???


@Meliodas was saying you wouldn't say anything about China, I pointed out that you did. end of story.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

HAL said:


> Imagine if I said to you that your attitude toward women is probably because you're an Asian guy (ergo, all Asian men have a bad attitude toward women). Your racism alarm bells would be going off, and quite rightly.
> 
> Now reverse that and imagine why it's probably not great to tell someone that their input is "probably because they're white".
> 
> It's collectivism of the highest order, and has extreme overlap with generic racism. Well done, you're being the thing you claim to oh-so hate.


I would not be offended...they have a totally different culture. pointing out facts about different people is not racist...what about that dont you get?? you dont know anything about racism if you made the ridiculous assumption

if you want to die on the hill that someone calling you white is racist...die on that hill..its a stupid hill...but im not the God of hills or anything so...have fun in your misery


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## Six (Oct 14, 2019)

MoStoner12 said:


> View attachment 877790
> View attachment 877791
> 
> View attachment 877792
> ...


Therefore does it not behoove one to return to the motherland to escape the ravages of these whites?


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Fru2 said:


> "Due to various traumas, core wounds and conditionings, *narcissists hide behind an idealized self-image which is expressed as being highly charming and attractive, yet deeply uncaring, indifferent, self-centered and cruel.* Put empaths and narcissists together? Both come in contact with their “inverted/reverse” selves, and both are forced to learn, grow and heal as a result of such an experience (although this doesn’t always happen immediately, but through trial and error). However, it is important for empaths to realize that they can never “heal” the narcissists in their lives – any form of healing must originate within narcissist’s themselves. "
> 
> 
> 
> ...


guess im a narcissist because...i dunno...im just smarter than people...and knowing youre better than people at stuff makes you a narcissist...


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Queen of Cups said:


> I don’t think the issue here is the women
> 
> View attachment 877787


i never claimed it was


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Ewok City said:


> You're right. It's just a bait to attract the most attention that the OP could, so that he would feel a sense of accomplishment.
> 
> Now escape, run away as far as you can before the toxicity poisons your brain and tarnishes your soul!!! 😵
> 
> View attachment 877788


you think i do things for attention...someone is displacing.... 🤣 

let me try and make a wild assumption too...are you a middle child?


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Bella2016 said:


> Just because you haven't met the right person doesn't mean all women are going to leave you feeling empty. It took me years to meet my XNFJ and he's what I'm looking for (including the emotional support I wanted - and this is coming from a guy to a girl). They are a bit rare, and need to mature, and so do we in order to attract them. But a mature XNTP and mature XNFJ is a very fulfilling relationship on both sides. Btw, I didn't type him until we had already been together for quite some time as I was taking a break from MBTI at the time. We just attracted each other. I had stopped hoping or even trying to find a relationship until I met him. And by the way - change is a good thing. I needed to change in order to be attractive to the right person, as without finding myself first I don't think I would have found him.


good advice


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## Fru2 (Aug 21, 2018)

Six said:


> Therefore does it not behoove one to return to the motherland to escape the ravages of these whites?


Not if he gains something from it, which he obviously does, otherwise he would've.
I'm just wondering now why he doesn't reply to this point?

.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Fru2 said:


> Literal Moses here..
> View attachment 877789
> 
> 
> ...


 so you call my people stupid...?? yawn im sick and tired of you people thinking youre better than everyone just because you killed everyone, we dont have small penis complex to want to fuck up everyone's life because we cant pleasure our women...

im just speaking historical and current facts...you dont like facts??...sounds about white to me...

i didnt say you should listen to me, i really dont want to talk to racists but im an entp i cant resist an argument


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## HAL (May 10, 2014)

MoStoner12 said:


> I would not be offended...they have a totally different culture. pointing out facts about different people is not racist...what about that dont you get?? you dont know anything about racism if you made the ridiculous assumption
> 
> if you want to die on the hill that someone calling you white is racist...die on that hill..its a stupid hill...but im not the God of hills or anything so...have fun in your misery


Okay then I think your attitude toward women is a classic British Asian attitude borne of the stinking gender imbalance that exists and is enforced by fundamentalist Islamic culture.

You think that's an okay thing for me to say? Bizarre.

That being said, I did live with a Pakistani-British lad from Bradford who said it's true. He said Asian guys in the UK treat women of "their own kind" as goddesses, whereas they see white girls as meat, sluts, whatever. So if you have a problem with women, maybe it's something to do with that, I dunno. You seem happy to suggest cultural issues are a part of this so I'm just throwing it out there. Personally I never even knew this was a thing, so I'm just a messenger here. You've seen my original replies in this thread, I think there's deep nuance to human romantic relations. But if you want some blunt one-size-fits-all answer based on culture or race, then sure I've just given you that too.


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## Fru2 (Aug 21, 2018)

MoStoner12 said:


> so you call my people stupid...?? yawn im sick and tired of you people thinking youre better than everyone just because you killed everyone, we dont have small penis complex to want to fuck up everyone's life because we cant pleasure our women...
> 
> im just speaking historical and current facts...you dont like facts??...sounds about white to me...
> 
> i didnt say you should listen to me, i really dont want to talk to racists but im an entp i cant resist an argument


Would you give the same treatment to your child, were she the child of a white woman? Her ancestors would be to blame, so I'm uesssing yes, based on your logic. You would call her a classic white trash that can't admit her guilt, and you'll berate her for inheriting some very unwanted white genes, and of course for being RACIST when she questions you.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Fru2 said:


> *We’ve all been taught the horror’s of the African slave trade. It’s in all the school books and in plenty of Hollywood movies and has been shoved down our throats since Obama took office. But for some reason the largest group of slaves in the British Colonies in the 17th Century doesn’t get mentioned at all- the Irish.*
> 
> 
> 
> ...


this is the stupidest thing you have ever said in your life...

please go reevaluate your existence and think about what you just said and why you said and whether it was ever a good idea that your parents gave birth to you, just for you to say "well you were worth more as SLAVES so why are you complaining" im not even going to get into it. the fact you think you can even bring this up makes me want to throw up all over my keyboard....how do people like you even exist....

to say something so ignorant....


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## Fru2 (Aug 21, 2018)

MoStoner12 said:


> this is the stupidest thing you have ever said in your life...


I didn't say it, I quoted an article that is based on research. If you have complaints then write them a sob story.


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Six said:


> Therefore does it not behoove one to return to the motherland to escape the ravages of these whites?


"GET OUT OF OUR COUNTRY IF YOU DONT LIKE IT" 

you ruined everyone's country already, no place is free from white evil..doesnt matter where i go 

how bout you pay black people the money you paid the slave owners for "loss of property" for 170 years....then we can talk about going back...but i mean..half the best athletes in this country are black (considering we are only 3%) i dont want you losing every sports competition, then coming back to capture us again, so we will stay thanks


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## X10E8 (Apr 28, 2021)

🙄🙄


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## MoStoner12 (Apr 24, 2021)

Fru2 said:


> Not if he gains something from it, which he obviously does, otherwise he would've.
> I'm just wondering now why he doesn't reply to this point?
> 
> .


"reply to me promptly you good for nothing ungrateful ******"

oh silly one i can only reply to one person at a time...

it was not my decision to move to this country when i was a child. its stupid and ignorant to ask me why im here...you think i want all this rain and racism in my life??? no 

but im here, maybe ill move back WHEN I WANT TO...NOT WHEN RACISTS LIKE YOU TELL ME 

YOU ALL DISGUST ME


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## Six (Oct 14, 2019)

MoStoner12 said:


> "GET OUT OF OUR COUNTRY IF YOU DONT LIKE IT"
> 
> you ruined everyone's country already, no place is free from white evil..doesnt matter where i go
> 
> how bout you pay black people the money you paid the slave owners for "loss of property" for 170 years....then we can talk about going back...but i mean..half the best athletes in this country are black (considering we are only 3%) i dont want you losing every sports competition, then coming back to capture us again, so we will stay thanks


Were your parents brought here as slaves?

I mean hell, I don't even care - I'll pay you pro rata to the degree of your inferiority complex if it gets you into a position to confront your own failures without blaming someone else?

How much?

1 million?
2?

How much would give you the balls to actually face up to what you can construct without blaming daddy white patriarchy?


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## Allostasis (Feb 2, 2021)

I think it is time for this thread to stop.. it is clearly outlived its original purpose.


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## Red Panda (Aug 18, 2010)

MoStoner12 said:


> You whore (I mean that affectionately)
> I don’t like my inner mind and soul being dissected so openly in public for everyone to see. I feel naked....you’re embarrassing me 😳😂
> 
> There was no need to do this this way 😂 I hope you don’t feel the need to undress everyone so brashly
> ...



The type of precedent you set in this thread, poisons the minds of young men who have difficulties with women too. I've met such people online and they are getting really badly influenced by the same incel rhetoric, and further ruins their chances for a relationship.
So yea I don't like leaving this sort of thing unchallenged, but it's not because I enjoy making people suffer, but because it's a lie. If you want a safe space to whine about how women are incapable of caring for men there are plenty of those in incel communities, it's the stuff they believe too, their mothers were terrible so all women are, too.

Being in a constant state of depressions shows in almost anything we do even when we try to hide it. It shows up even in the way we view the world as it's evident in this thread. These ideas you express always stem from some personal issue, because it's what it takes to get blinded to all other perspectives. No I don't evaluate the happiness just by time together, it's just not feasible to know someone well at 3 months. I think you said women are wired to care for other things, which is equivalent to "can't". But in any case, even saying we don't want to is quite the arrogant statement, and a lie. 

Why is therapy not for you?

I try to be as annoying as I can when they say such bullshit 🤷‍♀️


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