# What the hell is wrong with me...



## Galaris (Sep 2, 2009)

Ok..., I need to write this...

I usually stay quiet and keep shit on my mind, but seriously, it's being too much...


My life has been kinda hard, lot of shit in my family, epic failing relationship... You know, things that make you suffer etc etc etc...


But... I discovered that is making me harder to deal with people...

Today, some hours ago, I was in the underground, listening to music, loud, as always :/ (I think that most of introverts could understand me..., you know, it makes you feel away from everything). I went to a corner. On the next station, a whole crowd went in. Around me. Sooo close. I don't like people, I never did. I always try to go to silent places, with just a fewpeople or if possible no one in. But this time... fuck, I felt my breath was failing me, I was about to drown, seriously, I was almost hyperventilating :S

I had some anxiety troubbles months ago, right now I'm kinda stressed, depressed, kinda anxious, but... it went out of fucking nowhere, I wasn't even able to listen to my music, I was just like 'please please please please go away'. When I reached my station I was almost running to the exit... What the fuck people...


I was like... needing to say it... Doesn't happen often to me, but now I really needed it. 

Does someone know... why? Why the hell could that happen? >_<


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## wonderfert (Aug 17, 2010)

Panic attack. 

Possibly due to: Agoraphobia - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


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## BlissfulDreams (Dec 25, 2009)

I agree with Wonderfert. But please don't think that something is "wrong" with you. You were overwhelmed. You like personal space and naturally avoid crowds, whereas in that situation, you couldn't avoid them and felt like your personal space was being intruded upon. You are not in a constant state of panic.

Panic attacks and anxiety happen to many people, but if you notice that they are having a negative effect on your life (ie. more than just occasional episodes), you may want to speak to someone about that.


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## Galaris (Sep 2, 2009)

wonderfert said:


> Panic attack.
> 
> Possibly due to: Agoraphobia - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


Yes..., that's what I thought... My ex-boyfriend used to have those panic attacks... 

As said..., I never liked people, but... it's the first time I feel That Bad just because of people.


Thank you very much for the info and the comment, wonderfert.



BlissfulDreams said:


> I agree with Wonderfert. But please don't think that something is "wrong" with you. You were overwhelmed. You like personal space and naturally avoid crowds, whereas in that situation, you couldn't avoid them and felt like your personal space was being intruded upon. You are not in a constant state of panic.
> 
> Panic attacks and anxiety happen to many people, but if you notice that they are having a negative effect on your life (ie. more than just occasional episodes), you may want to speak to someone about that.



Thank you Bliss (can I call you Bliss? ^^'' ), that's exactly what I thought... But I'm confused about the reason of that panic attack... I wasn't even thinking anything annoying or something, I was ok, with my music and stuff... But then those people went in and omg... :S


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## wonderfert (Aug 17, 2010)

Galaris said:


> But I'm confused about the reason of that panic attack... I wasn't even thinking anything annoying or something, I was ok, with my music and stuff... But then those people went in and omg... :S


Sometimes that's all it takes. Just people. 

It can be like claustrophobia, except that the walls that are closing in on you are people.


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## BlissfulDreams (Dec 25, 2009)

Galaris said:


> Thank you Bliss (can I call you Bliss? ^^'' ), that's exactly what I thought... But I'm confused about the reason of that panic attack... I wasn't even thinking anything annoying or something, I was ok, with my music and stuff... But then those people went in and omg... :S


Sure, you can call me Bliss. roud:

Wonderfert is right. Sometimes all it takes is people, if that's what triggers your anxiety. Sometimes it's certain types of people or a size of a crowd. I used to get really nervous and panicky when I was younger and if the circumstances are right, I can still get panic attacks. So don't worry, you're not alone in that.

If you feel like that, you can try to talk to yourself in a calm, assertive way to try to lessen the panicky feelings. But don't get hard on yourself about it. If you start beating yourself up for feeling that way, then you have feelings of shame added into the mix. You don't need that.


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## Scruffy (Aug 17, 2009)

I agree with the above.

You could try training yourself to be more comfortable around people (nothing crazy), but I think you could definitely reduce the panic attacks/anxiety. I'd recommend "forcing" yourself to go out, but don't make it a drastic regiment.

Slowly try to be around a tolerable amount of people (slightly more than whats comfortable), you don't have to interact with them (but hey, it may happen and perhaps a good thing will come of it) just make an atmosphere. Eventually you'll raise your tolerance for people, and probably feel a hell of a lot better.

You don't have to be pre-programmed for it.


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## Galaris (Sep 2, 2009)

wonderfert said:


> Sometimes that's all it takes. Just people.
> 
> It can be like claustrophobia, except that the walls that are closing in on you are people.


I was claustrophobic when a kid :\ , and yeah, feels similar now I think about it.

As said, I've been feeling uncomfortable with people around since months, years ago... And I don't really understand this sudden phobia, panic or whatever...



BlissfulDreams said:


> Sure, you can call me Bliss. roud:
> 
> Wonderfert is right. Sometimes all it takes is people, if that's what triggers your anxiety. Sometimes it's certain types of people or a size of a crowd. I used to get really nervous and panicky when I was younger and if the circumstances are right, I can still get panic attacks. So don't worry, you're not alone in that.
> 
> If you feel like that, you can try to talk to yourself in a calm, assertive way to try to lessen the panicky feelings. But don't get hard on yourself about it. If you start beating yourself up for feeling that way, then you have feelings of shame added into the mix. You don't need that.


Oh, thanks, really. I'm just confused about the reason of my sudden panic... I'm afraid of developing real agoraphobia, people is everywhere (aaaaahhhhh that actually pisses me off hard anyway).

I will really try that...



Scruffy said:


> I agree with the above.
> 
> You could try training yourself to be more comfortable around people (nothing crazy), but I think you could definitely reduce the panic attacks/anxiety. I'd recommend "forcing" yourself to go out, but don't make it a drastic regiment.
> 
> ...



Nice idea... Let's see if I get it, I will try for sure, having phobia to people is not the best thing I could get this Christmas tbh xD

Thank you very much, seriously, it helps A Lot... I don't know who I could tell these things if wouldn't know PerC... My family is not the best people to do it :\ And I don't really like going to my best friend and telling her that and making her getting worried and shit :\


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## jbking (Jun 4, 2010)

*Just something to add.*

Social anxiety could be another explanation I'd toss out there. There may have been all kinds of different reasons for having a surge of fear or panic come when people entered and you were surrounded. Overwhelmed is a fine way to describe it and what you may want are some coping strategies to help manage this better. It isn't about being defective or bad, just that sometimes we need new tricks to survive in the world. Yes I have social anxiety and while most of the time it isn't a big problem there are exceptions that can happen. I can tense up sending a friend a text message or seeing that someone sent me an e-mail to give a couple of examples.


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## Galaris (Sep 2, 2009)

jbking said:


> Social anxiety could be another explanation I'd toss out there. There may have been all kinds of different reasons for having a surge of fear or panic come when people entered and you were surrounded. Overwhelmed is a fine way to describe it and what you may want are some coping strategies to help manage this better. It isn't about being defective or bad, just that sometimes we need new tricks to survive in the world. Yes I have social anxiety and while most of the time it isn't a big problem there are exceptions that can happen.* I can tense up sending a friend a text message or seeing that someone sent me an e-mail to give a couple of examples*.


Happens usually to me lately... Specially this year...

Tbh that description on the wikipedia sounds more familiar to me, so much.

Thanks for the link and the tips..., seriously, I'm very thankful... I really need it :/ It was becoming harder and harder and I didn't notice until yesterday when that happened, that it is probably going to get worse ffs.


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## Lokkye (Dec 28, 2009)

Panic attacks are pretty normal. don't fret you're not the only one who has them, I have a friend who has panic attacks, and he's actually fine most of the time.
It's perfectly alright, I don't think anything's wrong with you, I think it's just your introversion that's causing these things


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## Neon Knight (Aug 11, 2010)

If it is indeed panic, once you figure out the one true real reason for the panic attacks and talk about it, deal with it, they tend to go away on their own and the anxiety with it.


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