# Infected



## Ninja (Jun 28, 2009)

How do I end the infection of a girl in my mind? How do I stop caring for her enough so she won't be intruding on my thoughts of school work, short circuiting my creativity, and rerouting to strategy to get with her. All intellection has gone to the beast and hunting tactics. It's a sign that the shadow is taking over, and it comes with attachment. Like the earth revolves around the sun effected by it's gravity, going through night and day. Though my days and nights seem more severe, as if gravity is increased on the dark side of the earth, and pulls me with tension from my usual orbit. The infection is part of the curse of feeling, and I accept it, but it's hard to control when it's directly attached to the reptilian brain and survival instinct like an umbilical cord providing it life. 

The search to become one with the virus motivates me to live. My imagination leads me to believe that I have it when I don't, because I don't need the real thing in full to be satisfied. Just some fuel to get myself going and I can turn into a dark matter powered vehicle. Pouring shadow content into the fuel tank, and contentment in fantasy can take me far. 

What's that advice. I challenge you to find a cure. I'd like to see if I'm insulted by responses. This is no insecurity issue. And an intention scientist would say I say that because I don't want a real response. I do, but not something I've already thought about or some cliche non caring BS. Though I can't force concern how I'd like it given, so lets go with it.


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## TurranMC (Sep 15, 2009)

Is it possible to keep a thought from entering your head entirely? Can keep yourself from feeling an emotion? I do not believe it to be possible to do either. You must simply decide whether or not you will control these thoughts and feelings or will you let them control you.


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## Lucretius (Sep 10, 2009)

I would try some self-guided mind control - cognitive behavioral therapy.


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## decided (May 17, 2009)

-- So have you been experiencing awesome self-esteem one minute, and terrible self-esteem the next?
-- Have you been unable to sleep properly or concentrate?
-- Have you been keeping and rereading her texts or remembering in great detail some of the things she’s said or done?
-- Have you had a change in appetite or an upset stomach recently?

These are a few signs of someone with ‘love-sickness’, so it’s interesting that you call it an infection.
People often get a little obsessive compulsive when they fall in love, so don’t worry you’re not alone.

I presume there are good reasons that you cannot just date this girl?

I do not have a cure. But here are a few suggestions to help you cope until the feelings subside:
1. Congratulate yourself that you have the ability to admire and care for someone else. Being able to love someone is awesome.
2. Delete those texts and emails from her that you've been keeping. Throw away that meaningless trinket that you keep looking at. Do it now.
3. When you cannot concentrate on anything but her, direct your energy creatively. Write down what you’re thinking and feeling, paint a picture or write a song. Set the feelings free and then get back to your work.
4. If you still cannot concentrate, get up and go for a run or a walk. Get moving, even if you don’t feel like it. It will make you feel better.
5. If it is possible, stop seeing her so much. Restrict contact in a way that seems natural. Catch up with other friends instead, or pick up an old hobby again.
6. If you are thinking about her so much that you’re not getting tasks done, try making a plan for your day. Tick things off when you have finished them, and give yourself a pat on the back.

Good luck.


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## red riding hood (Aug 10, 2009)

Well a poet I like a lot (Merrit Malloy) said nothing can cure a woman of a man like another man, maybe it works for guys???? Just go find some other woman and boink them? Totally kidding kido, I am sorry to hear that you got bit and infected by the love bug, it must not be good, because you don’t seem to want to love this girl, so I am sorry. I think decided gave some good advice, might I add finding some friends to hang out with and taking a trip might help? Change of scenery and good friends helps some people. Me myself when I have thoughts or feelings that I can not seem to escape, I hit the woods and try to be totally alone, and simply focus on enjoying and learning from the natural world around me. It seems peace and answers come to me when I stop seeking them and just relax. I am so sorry little Ninja, I wish I could hug you and make it all better.

OH and Hay if there is nothing wrong (I repeat if there is nothing wrong) with you liking this girl, just tell her you like her, tell her you are the bomb, that you are a sweet cute adorable kind intelligent young man and you like her and you want her. You will always have friends here to support you if you are hurt little one. 

OH and what is wrong with you liking this girl and thinking of her?


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## Kevinaswell (May 6, 2009)

It makes you feel psychotic, doesn't it?


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## The Proof (Aug 5, 2009)

find another girl, there are plenty, they restock the shelves when they run out


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## PeacePassion (Jun 9, 2009)

Perhaps the antidote is in the poison. Is it not mutual? Maybe it's time to see if it is, and if you find out it's not, maybe that'll help you move on. And if it is, then hey, there you go. :happy:


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## Ninja (Jun 28, 2009)

There's nothing wrong with it red. And I question if a mutual attraction can be with anyone but another INFJ. If she is then I'll believe that it can even be mutual.. but if not.. then I'm no doubt feeling more, more of a drive to connect, understand, and become one in various ways  To assume the great merging of minds where It's hard for me to differentiate what's me. Though I should only do that for a time.. because schizophrenic minds are unhealthy. I don't know! If she feels the same way.. because I don't blatantly ask, though I've said "I like you", which is close.. but to ask directly pressing the issue and make me come off as needy, and fishing for love. This is becoming too much all about me now. 

My baby sitter use to give me hugs when I was small. I would lean my hips in to try to hump her. She was too tall though.. I would only made it half way. Watch your hugs.


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## PeacePassion (Jun 9, 2009)

Ask her on a date or something?


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## red riding hood (Aug 10, 2009)

Ninja said:


> There's nothing wrong with it red. And I question if a mutual attraction can be with anyone but another INFJ. If she is then I'll believe that it can even be mutual.. but if not.. then I'm no doubt feeling more, more of a drive to connect, understand, and become one in various ways  To assume the great merging of minds where It's hard for me to differentiate what's me. Though I should only do that for a time.. because schizophrenic minds are unhealthy. I don't know! If she feels the same way.. because I don't blatantly ask, though I've said "I like you", which is close.. but to ask directly pressing the issue and make me come off as needy, and fishing for love. This is becoming too much all about me now.
> 
> My baby sitter use to give me hugs when I was small. I would lean my hips in to try to hump her. She was too tall though.. I would only made it half way. Watch your hugs.


You tried to hump your baby sitter's leg, priceless... I just got a vision of a cute little kid with log dread locks humping Gwyneth Paltrow’s leg. :crazy:I would still hug you little one even if you did try to hump my leg :shocked:

Honey I do not think for you to have a mutual attraction and healthy relationship you have to have another INFJ. My fiancé is not INFJ and boy do I find him attractive but I digress either way you have to have a little difference to make things balance someone too much like you could get a little dull. I think if there is nothing wrong with your attraction to this girl then you should at least explore it, kiss the girl and see how it goes... you are adorable little one… I am sure she would find you attractive... and given your little ninja empathic gifts can't you tell a little already if she is attracted to you? Why are you so hesitant? On second thought if you have a bad feeling like somehow this is unhealthy or wrong then it might be best to just get away from it. I don’t know for sure… I am rather fond of you and I just want you to be happy


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## Ninja (Jun 28, 2009)

Uh oh red. If you mention yourself that's bait for me to take while leaving the hook in place. Dangling in my waters! Non INFJ girls piss me off in slight incremenents due to their lack of understanding of their selves, and thus the world. I can trust more that after an INFJ reads my words and gives it thought, she'll grasp the true meaning behind my message more so than a non.. who would get what she gets and run with it.. wearing only socks when I just tossed her shoes. 

I know how to pace myself. I know when it feels right to move in for kisses and what not. I'm rather fond of you too red, which is why I would gladly hump your leg as a child for you, any day. 

Now to you! Your loyalty.. red.. stomps out the frustration you have that may turn to anger with another. But as you said.. I digress  Committing, and then turning loyal, to someone I would have to battle with when trying to explain my logic is not a worth while endeavor to me. People can only pass off my words as a joke, or go around it so much.. then I start to pick up that what I'm saying isn't going through.


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## snail (Oct 13, 2008)

Let your love happen as long as you have no other commitments. Even if it is irrational, there may be a lesson in it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## red riding hood (Aug 10, 2009)

Ninja said:


> Uh oh red. If you mention yourself that's bait for me to take while leaving the hook in place. Dangling in my waters! Non INFJ girls piss me off in slight incremenents due to their lack of understanding of their selves, and thus the world. I can trust more that after an INFJ reads my words and gives it thought, she'll grasp the true meaning behind my message more so than a non.. who would get what she gets and run with it.. wearing only socks when I just tossed her shoes.
> 
> I know how to pace myself. I know when it feels right to move in for kisses and what not. I'm rather fond of you too red, which is why I would gladly hump your leg as a child for you, any day.
> 
> Now to you! Your loyalty.. red.. stomps out the frustration you have that may turn to anger with another. But as you said.. I digress  Committing, and then turning loyal, to someone I would have to battle with when trying to explain my logic is not a worth while endeavor to me. People can only pass off my words as a joke, or go around it so much.. then I start to pick up that what I'm saying isn't going through.


Now you are humping the legs of people who are only wearing socks lord have mercy you are just getting out of control :tongue:

I am very sure that you know how to put just the right moves on any young lady dear, I just don't want to see you get hurt, and if you are having a bad feeling about it (as if it is a infection) then it might be best to just take some of the advice Decided gave above in the first place and get away from it. 

However I am not in your shoes so I don't have a good feel for it, what ever you decide to do cute stuff you have support and understanding here :happy:


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