# (POLL) When people stare at you/make eye contact...?



## Ming (Apr 7, 2010)

I got my glasses recently, so now I can see everyone's faces clearly when I put them on. What's been making me feel really weird/awkward is that I've been noticing people, and being an F, I can sense people's emotions towards me. 

Seeing people's faces was like full power BOOOM, because I could see everyone so clearly, it's frightening. 

I'm alright with looking at someone else, but I find it crippling when someone stares at me. Is it just low self esteem? But I don't feel that I'm not self confident, or that I degrade myself. I'm definitely confident, at least in my own sense. It's just that I feel as if they can stare into who I AM. 

When they look, I glance away. Then I steal some glances back; if they're still looking, I try to pretend that I'm concentrating on the patterns outside the window.

When I didn't have glasses on (I have -2.5 vision), I couldn't see anyone's eyes, so it was okay. Now, I kinda only want to wear my glasses when I'm too far away from the blackboard.

I'm just interested if this happens to other people? It's making me crazy ...


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## Immemorial (May 16, 2010)

I usually give them a cold stare as if to say 'What the hell are you looking at!?'. 
I cannot stand being stared at, it irritates me and weakens my concentration.

Although certain types of people make me feel incredibly awkward when they stare at me and I cannot look at them.


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## Steve MD (Jun 11, 2010)

When people stare at me it makes me feel awkward, as if that person wants to tel me something or ask me something....and sometimes I'm right. 
Brief eye contact is fine during a conversation...otherwise I find it kinda weird talking to a person who isn't looking at you....


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## Kitten (Mar 28, 2010)

If I can sense that someone is staring at me, usually I just won't do anything and won't stare at them back, because I don't want them to feel like they got "caught" - I don't want them to feel embarrassed or awkward for being caught staring at me. :tongue: 

Usually I'll be kind of curious as to WHY they're staring at me, but other than that, I'll be alright. Let them stare... there's no harm in that. :3


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## Nasmoe (Nov 11, 2009)

When I sense someone staring at me I always wonder what are they looking at, but I try to ignore it unless they do it for a really long time.


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## Vaka (Feb 26, 2010)

My only problem is that I can't really stand eye contact with most people. I think it's for the same reason that I can't really do one-on-one conversation with a lot of people. Any situation where I feel like I'm being personally addressed or payed attention to makes me shy because I feel like I have to say something interesting or like the person is expecting something from me. I fear that there'll be an awkward moment, and in that, I create awkwardness. 

But usually, I'm fine if someone stares at me or glances at me. I don't really think much of those situations.


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## Midnight Runner (Feb 14, 2010)

I'll stare back sometimes with an indifferent look on my face. The rest of the time I will wonder what is so interesting about me that makes them desire to stare, but I won't really care.


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## Siggy (May 25, 2009)

I couldn't care less., providing that I notice it to begin with. I'm usually caught up in my own train of thoughts to be looking at my surroundings.


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## bendomolena (Dec 30, 2009)

I usually stare back, unless it's someone I abhor, then I wouldn't even give them the time of day. I don't know why, it's just something I do. It's party of my personality and my curiosity. Maybe because I'm a very blunt person.


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## RainetheWolf (Jul 6, 2010)

I hate it when people stare, I usually try to ignore it. I also do not like constant eye contact, short intervals are okay though.


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## EverxAfterxEver (Jul 6, 2010)

I am usually the one staring haha 


I like having constant contact with people, whether its eyes or by hugging or something


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## agokcen (Jan 3, 2010)

Eye contact is so awkward! I just...look away...and hope that they'll return the favor...


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## SmileyMan (Mar 24, 2010)

I enjoy staring at women waiting for them to stare back, and then hold the connection once they do. Sparks fly everywhere, and then they look away.

But I keep staring. /creepy

I have to make an active effort to break eye contact with my teachers, because I'm worried that they might view it as hostility when I'm only listening intently. Most of the time I perceive the other person looking away as a sign of weakness, and I don't want to know whether or not my teachers are weak. Sometimes I forget and one specific teacher of mine stutters and looks away and looks back and looks away (and so on..), and it has made me lose some of my respect for him. He's still a cool teacher though.

When I notice people staring at me? Depends on who it is. If it's someone looking for an excuse to instigate a fight, then I look away. But apart from that I stare back.


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## brindin (Jul 2, 2010)

If the person that is staring is attractive and female, I will shy and look the other way.
In any other case, I'll either just ignore it or stare at them back and make a stupid face.


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## kiwigrl (Apr 27, 2010)

I don't like to maintain eye contact with people I'm not familiar with. But I am often aware out of my peripheral vision that they are staring. I guess I just presume they are having a perve or something.


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## saturnne (Sep 8, 2009)

The first option made me laugh. A lot. :crazy: But I wouldn't do that.


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## L'Empereur (Jun 7, 2010)

Stare back or look away.


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## Rationality (Jul 8, 2010)

I don't really mind. If I look up and somebody is watching me, I just glance away. Sometimes it makes me uncomfortable if someone is staring _alot_ because I wonder if I've got something on me or if they just think I'm weird looking, but most people don't do that.


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## Packey (Jun 20, 2010)

I'll usually just stare right back. It's actually gotten me into trouble before. A few months ago this guy was staring at me, I thought he was being confrontational so I stared right back. He came over to me and it looked like he was going to start something. Instead he starts chatting me up asks me out to dinner.

I definately did not expect that, but hey, a free dinner is a free dinner.


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## OutcastGenius (Feb 22, 2010)

I usually try to figure out what they are thinking. I really hate it when people stare at you when you're not facing them, so you can feel their gaze on your back. It is really distracting. :angry:I also hate prolonged eye-contact, so I try to ignore it.


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## Red Leaf (Jul 3, 2010)

If someone is staring at me, it doesn't bother me. Direct eye contact weirds me out severely and I avoid doing it to people even if I'm speaking with them or know them well and am comfortable around them. Thanks asperger's....


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## Seducer of the Homeless (Jun 14, 2009)

well, i am really guilty of people-watching...

but, when i am talking to someone, i try to keep eye contact a lot and talk with my hands and stuff, more than most do - i am still very much introverted, but i act quite a bit. eye contact is awesome, i try to communicate that way as much as possible....

is that creepy? :sad:


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## jdmn (Feb 5, 2010)

No, that's not creepy, it's important because it captivates people and makes them more involved in conversations. You can communicate things that words cannot. For that eyes are called "The mirror of our soul". 

I actually like it, it makes me understand the person better, although sometimes I may find umpleasant details, like.. this person is bored, annoyed, etc. The only time I don't like it is when I'm thinking about something someone asked me, and I can't watch the person because it makes me feel insecure. Anyways, too much eye contact is not okay, you may creep out people.

About being stared at.. mm.. depends on the situation. If out of nowhere someone stares at me, I get curious about that person. If I'm concentrated doing something, I don't like it, it distracts me. If I'm giving a speech or something related to that, I like to be stared at. If a random person is constantly staring at me, it scares me. It all depends on the situation and the person.


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## OctoberSkye (Jun 3, 2010)

I have -19 vision. When people stare at me, I don't notice. When I stare at people, I'm trying to get them into focus.


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## UncertainSomething (Feb 17, 2010)

Awesome thread. Well I stare right back with an evil eye if someone stares at me in an intimidating way, but when its someone I like I cut it just short of a stare, just enough that they know I noticed them. I'm always conscious of how the other person feels when I look at them, I tend to focus on peoples eyes to read them and sometimes I feel like I'm kind of violating the person. On rare occasions I come across people that are blank starers, they look right through you but not into you if that makes sense, I find those people very difficult to read. I find so much meaning in eye contact that I try my hardest to moderate it so I tend to not make much eye contact unless its someone special. I also kind of focus strongly on somebody in shot bursts when I'm explaining something to them but tend to look away when they talk to me unless they need me to focus on them. The lack of eye contact from me doesn't seem to worry people much when they are talking to me but sometimes I do feel like I should make more eye contact but I don't want to give the impression that I'm connecting with them. I feel sometimes that my eyes are like lasers and can split peoples heads open and dissect their brain, its a bit annoying


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## Time to Paradox (May 17, 2010)

I usually just ignore it, but seeing this poll makes me want to adopt the method of staring at them _even harder_ when I realize that they're effectively observing me intensely.


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## Drewbie (Apr 28, 2010)

I stare back. Usually with double the force. :tongue:

I have a thing about eye contact... I make eye contact with anyone who will look at me and usually feel the need to hold it. I even try making eye contact with objects that lack eyes. >.> It's a compulsion that sometimes gets me in trouble. Because really, there's people out there you shouldn't make and keep eye contact with and I have a really hard time stopping myself.


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## The James (Jul 20, 2010)

I can't look anyone in the eye unless its someone I know and they are female. So pretty much I never look anyone in the eye because very few people meet those qualifications.

But when someone is making eye contact with me then I get really uncomfortable and probably a little red in the face and my speech (if I happen to be talking which isn't likely) becomes jumbled and very quiet. Sometimes it sucks being so incredibly shy :frustrating:


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## darlarosa (Jul 20, 2010)

Eh I think it's best to stick to the rules. It's a bit normal to be uncomfortable, if its impacting your relationships than you need to break the habit

If your looking at someone don't stare focus on the area between the eyes. Look than look away. If someone stares make eye contact and convey the emotion you feel toward that person and look away.


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## LeCielEstBleu (Jan 11, 2010)

Ming said:


> I got my glasses recently, so now I can see everyone's faces clearly when I put them on. What's been making me feel really weird/awkward is that I've been noticing people, and being an F, I can sense people's emotions towards me.
> 
> Seeing people's faces was like full power BOOOM, because I could see everyone so clearly, it's frightening.
> 
> ...









I can so relate to what you said about the whole glasses thing, that's why i dont wear them . Glasses make you self-conscious, throw rocks at it .


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## LeCielEstBleu (Jan 11, 2010)

Ming said:


> I got my glasses recently, so now I can see everyone's faces clearly when I put them on. What's been making me feel really weird/awkward is that I've been noticing people, and being an F, I can sense people's emotions towards me.
> 
> Seeing people's faces was like full power BOOOM, because I could see everyone so clearly, it's frightening.
> 
> ...









I can so relate to what you said about the whole glasses thing, that's why i dont wear them . Glasses make you self-conscious, throw rocks at it .


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## grmpf (Mar 18, 2010)

I often don't notice. When it does happen, I often ask people what is on their mind. It is surprising how often they really answer this question and how often the stare turns out to be a non-observing look of people who are caught in their own thoughts. This might be pure projection, though...


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## Kyandigaru (Mar 11, 2012)

if they keep doing in i just laugh.


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## Bronzework (Oct 23, 2013)

Depends on the person and their expression as to how I react.


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## knightingling (Oct 15, 2013)

Hmm, in normal situations, I usually do the staring.

I am quite self-conscious, so when people stare at me, when I meet their gaze I usually leave either a small smile (hinting that I know what they are thinking, even if I don't really) or I don't leave anything at all but a blank facial expression as if I "don't bother" or didn't see them. But when I do so, lots of thoughts are already raining in my head, like, "I wonder if she's thinking about me..? Why is she looking at me like that? What is she thinking about me?"... ad infinitum.


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## Obscure (May 20, 2013)

I usually look in the eyes while I speak with anyone and that annoys them I guess. I don't like talking to the wall; I'm mentally more comfortable when I look in the eyes because it makes sure they are with me.

But if people arestaring at me without talking, like it's mentioned, than I don't give a flying fuck, as I'm already used to.
I sometimes stare for a short time, when I see something very beautiful or very ugly, very brilliant or dum, I try to analyse it I guess. As if I'm gonna make a sculpture of it


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## Children Of The Bad Revolution (Oct 8, 2013)

I don't like it. It makes me really self-conscious. I notice wherever I go, people do this. 

I thought I was paranoid until I was sitting with a friend one day, eating lunch when all of a sudden, several people (not sitting with each other, different people) at the same time turned around to look and stare at me. I said to my friend 'They're looking at me' and she then checked herself. I guess she thought I was also being paranoid but she agreed and she said 'They are, actually'. So, I don't think it's part of my social anxiety to 'make up' in my head that people stare at me. Maybe people don't like something about me/my face or my body language or demeanor? It's happened to me for a long time. It's really strange.


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## emmylouise (Nov 7, 2013)

It makes me feel so awkward, I can't help but wonder what they're staring at/thinking.


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## stiletto (Oct 26, 2013)

*Depends on how I feel. I'd say 60% don't care but on the occasion that I happen to be irritated that day, I stare back with twice the force.*


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## VCTN (Nov 10, 2013)

I stare back and smile


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## Lacrimosa (Jan 5, 2013)

I get a bit paranoid when people stare at me. I feel really self-conscious and look anywhere else but them and where they are. Making eye contact is awkward and I usually look away in one or 2 seconds wondering why they were staring and what they were think about.


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## CaptainShawnee (Oct 11, 2013)

Where's the freak the crap out option? Because that's what I do haha


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## JoanCrawford (Sep 27, 2012)

I go "Can I help you?" or I slyly lean in close to them and say "Would you like to take a picture? It'll last longer."


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## Riy (Apr 1, 2010)

If it is an obvious stare then I'll probably wonder why, but I wouldn't go too deep into it.


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## JTHearts (Aug 6, 2013)

Either people (and by that I mean people that I'm not talking to) almost never make eye contact with me, or I just never notice it. When I'm talking with someone, they make eye contact with me a lot but it doesn't make me uncomfortable so I just make eye contact back. I do notice though, that sometimes women (and only women) will look at me. Males don't seem to care though


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## Figment Pigment (Feb 19, 2012)

I get a little uncomfortable when people stare non-stop during a conversation. I just try to develop a stare pattern. For example: Stare at the person 5s, then the wall for 5s. Back to the person. Back to the wall. Over to the person walking by... and so on. I may seem a little distracted, but it makes me feel less like my level of awkward is over 9000.


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