# ENFJ & ESFJ...what's the difference?



## Rosexoxo (Jul 29, 2013)

I've recently been reading on Myers-Briggs personalities and how they differ, and taken a few online quizzes in order to determine my type. I have repeatedly recieved ENFJ as an answer, but after reading a detailed description of both, it's hard to determine the major differences and how they apply to me. If anyone could explain the differences it would be a very big help. Thanks!


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## LiquidLight (Oct 14, 2011)

ESFJ is probably a little more grounded in the here-and-now because of their preference for sensation. ENFJ might be more interested in ideas about people, or people-oriented things or philosophies, where the ESFJ might be more interested in real-world practical implications.

The stereotypical Kierseyan/MBTI ESFJ is something like the bossy busybody PTA mom who who is always trying to impose some moral standard on the group for what they perceive is the group's own benefit. A prototypical ENFJ might be someone more like Oprah Winfrey. If you've ever seen the movie _The Social Network,_ I would argue Justin Timberlake portrays Sean Parker as an ENFJ (though the real Sean Parker is pretty clearly a Ne-dom).


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## FolkCat1234 (Jul 29, 2013)

Main difference-Fe-Si-Ne-Ti for the ESFJs and Fe-Ni-Se-Ti for the ENFJs. The Ni in ENFJs can be powerful in realizing possibilities in the world. Sometimes, it can be manipulative. These functions make them excellent counselors and psychologists.

Whereas the ESFJ is more domineering. Si gives a black-and-white worldview to the ESFJ. They have a strong sense of right and wrong, and are excellent at planning. This makes them great community organizers and teachers.


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## d e c a d e n t (Apr 21, 2013)

Ni-Se vs Si-Ne.


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## Joshua.E (Jul 31, 2013)

Well as I got older, I found myself acting like a ESFJ in key situations and has been so useful for me. party planning and hosting. 
The typical descriptions of ESFJs make them sound so dreary and annoying, but ESFJ done right is so pleasant and nice to be around. The masters of entertaining, manners, and consideration of others. 


So when I throw parties, I have rules for guests, and I enforce them. I think proper placed ettiquette rules, make for a good party, if applied right and explained properly. nothing is ever implied. "if you come to my party you will....." is in the invitations.

Simple rule: only told to guys "don't hit on my female guests. be friendly with everyone, hit on them after the party". 

Rule makes girls feel safer. more girls come to my parties. more hot single girls, more happy guys. 

Though as to the party itself. I plan, I buy, I prepare, I cook, I sleep, I greet, I manage, I clean. And i actually enjoy the whole process. I usually make the party for one person I love, a lover or friend, and then express my emotions and feelings through concrete action. Then it creates a nice feeling for everyone. I like to use parties for people to make relationships, and know people better. and helps me to be socially networked. 

But overall, i have to be rather strict and demanding. Get things the way I want them. but ESFJs plans are flexible. patterned based. They know from experience certain things work, and try to get people to do things in a way that work, but by using the least direct pressure on a person as possible. people should just come in and naturally get it, with a few shy people needing a shove here and there. and then back up plans need to be made on things going in different ways.


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## Joshua.E (Jul 31, 2013)

ENFJs are more emotionally imposing than ESFJs. A ENFJ can get in your head and make you feel things. Their emotions "contaminate" more. 

I would say ESFJs are more aware of physical emotions, pain and comfort. Can manipulate bodies better. They actually feel other peoples physical well being in their own, and down to very tiny details. So they "manipulate" through well placed actions. While a ENFJ can "manipulate: people with just their presence and being. 

ESFJs will probably dress better and behave like a "standard" person more. They don't do this because they wish to conform or sell out, but just find a pleasure in it. Though a ESFJ is also a chameleon, can adapt to any social context, if they learned them. But a less mature or dumb ESFJ, may have a very narrow view of life, and rarely seek out new paradigms, unless forced to.


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## shakti (Oct 10, 2012)

I'm an ENFJ and have an ESFJ best female friend, and though we are very similar in some ways (being social and very focused on people), we also have major differences. She accepts most things as a given and is more keen on following tradition, e.g. believes that men and women should act a certain way, while I'm always questioning where certain beliefs come from and trying to change them. She's more pessimistic and cautious about the world, I'm more optimistic and idealistic, she's more into traditional values such as family, social status etc. while I'm more of an unconventional hippy type... etc.

To sum up:

ESFJ - Fe+Si- trying to harmonise others (Fe) with social values shared in the past and present (Si)
ENFJ - Fe+Ni - trying to harmonise others (Fe) with your own vision of social values (Ni)


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