# What is this thing about miscomunication between INTJ and INTP



## 666 (Dec 29, 2009)

The thing is me INTJ and my love INTP express same ideas but in different layouts, so that at the end we don't get each other's main points. We could discuss for hours and finally end at the very starting point realizing that no one actually succeeded at sending the right message as if the core of it was lost somewhere in the midway. We don't argue, but it is very hard to pass the right message, so many misunderstandings and misconceptions follow and it takes a lot of energy and time just explaining what you wanna say. In other words, we are often stuck in this "explanation" level, rather than "analyzing ideas itself". 

Have anybody else experienced this? Why does this happen, how should we talk and formulate ideas to understand each other better? It is really frustrating to waste so much time and energy trying to explain sth. and finally realize that all of it was for nothing.. please help.


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## NeedsNewNameNow (Dec 1, 2009)

I think Ni and Ti are both hard to articulate and you spend alot of energy trying to get your explanation right


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## nevermore (Oct 1, 2010)

Yeah, I've found INTJ's often misinterpret the main point I'm trying to make, and they admit I often do the same. This despite the fact we usually have very engaging conversations. Despite our numerous similarities, we're coming from pretty different places functionally, and the same phenomenon might mean different things to both of us.


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## absentminded (Dec 3, 2010)

Dominant introverted functions don't lend themselves to coherent expression. Additionally, Ni and Ti are two drastically different formats.


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## 666 (Dec 29, 2009)

So what should we exactly do to make us understand each other better.


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## Runvardh (May 17, 2011)

666 said:


> So what should we exactly do to make us understand each other better.


Science and Math have rather precise sets of definitions exactly for this reason.


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## antiant (Jul 4, 2010)

666 said:


> So what should we exactly do to make us understand each other better.


Kiss each other.


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## ErrorCode (May 5, 2011)

Well, as many of us have seen recently, Ni has a toxic reaction to Ne wanting to get the meaning out of anything and everything, coupled with Ti thinking for the sake of thinking. If Ti is denied and Ne is considered ridiculous, underdeveloped Fe will then proceed to rage. 

Sounds fairly universal in the general procedure of some INTP-INTJ interactions, too.


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## OrangeAppled (Jun 26, 2009)

INTJs & INTPs are kind of "flipped" cognitively speaking. INTJs perceive with iNtuition, but look internally (so to speak), and they use external measures for their logical thinking. INTPs do the opposite - their N perception is directed externally, and they gauge logic by an internal measure. Because both prefer iNtuition & Thinking though, and are introverts, they may arrive at similar conclusions in very different ways.

I find the same issue with my INFJ boyfriend. We have the same "worldview", and yet, we have very different mindsets (very different ways of arriving at those views). It occasionally causes these circular discussions where neither of us seems able to get our point across, but then often at a later time, we find the other suddenly grasping the point, & it all seems so simple. What's most important, IMO, is that our views are compatible & we are able to effectively communicate them eventually (which is more than I can say for many other people, whom I often don't even attempt to communicate my thoughts to).


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## Peter (Feb 27, 2010)

666 said:


> So what should we exactly do to make us understand each other better.


Stay on track. Don't get into small details. That's difficult, but not impossible. Both have to consciously do this otherwise one will think the other is being arrogant.


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## Blocklos (Feb 22, 2011)

I think that Ne and Ni get along just fine, but Ti and Te have conflicts. Interestingly, they reach the same conclusion, but they don't respect the other's methods of getting there. When Te and Ti start fighting, it moves along to a Fe/Fi conflict and things get unproductive, yuck. If you realize what is happening, I think you can help it from getting too far. 

We had a good discussion about it here:
http://personalitycafe.com/enfp-forum-inspirers/58165-enfps-ti-2.html


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