# I feel lost



## xraydav (Jan 3, 2013)

Things that have changed so far:


I got a job
my university started again

I feel lost because I need go to work tomorrow morning and spend literally 4 hours doing nothing. This is my training so I get paid nothing until the fourth month comes. I'm only a month and a half into my training. It's a media job so when I do get paid its gonna be roughly 350 dollars per month in the country I'm in , and that is nothing compared to the energy put into doing the job. 

Almost everyday I think maybe i could make things different by going back to Australia. 

There I get paid more every fortnight for merely just studying, or doing nothing, than I do working my ass off here.

Considering I've started full time study as well, things are gonna be hectic. 

I don't know how to prepare for all this but now I have a job, and before I was lost without one.


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## islandlight (Aug 13, 2013)

I guess you have reasons for being where you are and doing what you're doing. If you haven't been there for long, maybe it's a transition period or culture shock.

I've lived in many places and considered myself quite adaptable. Until ... Last year I moved to a small isolated town for affordable housing. It seemed that there was nothing here -- nothing to do (except sports), not even any scenery. And for the first time in my life, I felt lonely.

I spent quite a bit of effort trying to find or initiate activities that I would enjoy. Things are slowly coming together. I still have moments of "My life is stupid," but lots of people have those. On balance, it's beginning to feel like this is an okay life, with pros and cons.

I'm learning to appreciate some exceptions to the bleak big picture, and some advantages to living here. For example, the people are consistently nice, and a couple of them even share my interests. And there's little traffic, and deer on the roads, and pretty birds outside my window.

Years ago I moved to a foreign country and didn't like it at first. (I had never even visited a foreign country before.) But within a year I realized I liked it better than my own country.

Good luck figuring it out.


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## Celtsincloset (Feb 17, 2014)

xraydav said:


> Things that have changed so far:
> 
> 
> I got a job
> ...


What are the benefits of doing this training, and keeping this job? Couldn't you get paid better doing something else?


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## xraydav (Jan 3, 2013)

Celtsincloset said:


> What are the benefits of doing this training, and keeping this job? Couldn't you get paid better doing something else?


Well the benefits are that after 3 months unpaid training, I get money. I'm considering other options but the job market is pretty narrow, and would take time to get another job


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## Celtsincloset (Feb 17, 2014)

xraydav said:


> Well the benefits are that after 3 months unpaid training, I get money. I'm considering other options but the job market is pretty narrow, and would take time to get another job


Three months unpaid training, just to get a job for the sake of getting a job? Or is this a vocational career path for you? You could spend your time looking for better work, or on personal investments, which could even be starting your own business in something. In my opinion, it’s way better than this…


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## xraydav (Jan 3, 2013)

Celtsincloset said:


> Three months unpaid training, just to get a job for the sake of getting a job? Or is this a vocational career path for you? You could spend your time looking for better work, or on personal investments, which could even be starting your own business in something. In my opinion, it’s way better than this…


It is a vocational training period. It is to get a job for the sake of it and also to have some form of money flowing and not idly wasting time doing nothing but study and living with my family. 

I reckon I should somehow start a business but it doesnt look easy from where I am. I need an income first


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## Celtsincloset (Feb 17, 2014)

Vocation: 'a strong feeling of suitability for a particular career or occupation.'
_"not all of us have a vocation to be nurses or doctors"_

Similar to: life's work, calling, mission.

What's meaningful to you, at least.

The only reason I can fathom working free for a month, is if this job was in line with my vocation and I knew it would lead me somewhere great, or would give me great opportunities of learning. You get this, opportunities to learn about the world with any little odd job you do, that pays you, but you keep searching for your vocation, moving on and amassing these experiences.

Now when I earn money, I know exactly what I'm saving it for. It isn't a house or a holiday. It's time: I'm saving up my money for time, to work on something long-term which is invaluable to me, and will provide me with the better way of living, now and moreso in the future, even if the thing isn't full time. I can do any job I like and be happy, because I'm not lost about what I want to do, with the money I earn, and with my life.


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## greyskies01 (Aug 23, 2018)

Yes, you can get paid just getting by. Don't worry about why they are paying you when you are doing nothing for 4 hours. 
Focus on where you want to be and put your time into that. It seems like you have that extra time. 
Then switch to it. Eventually you will have a decent amount of experience to know what you want better and things get easier.


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