# Enneagram Types' Responses to Criticism



## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

mostly satirical, but I think it's somewhat accurate :laughing:

1s: 
* *




"as your leader, I encourage you from time to time, and always in a respectful manner, to question my logic. if you are unconvinced a particular plan of action I've decided is the wisest tell me so, but allow me to convince you, and I promise right here and now, no subject will ever be taboo. except of course the subject that was just under discussion. the price you pay for bringing up either my Chinese or American heritage as a negative is....I collect your fuckin head. JUST like this fucker here.










female 2s: *fake gasps* "oh you don't mean lil ol' me do you? why how could you" *fakes crying and makes you feel like shit* 
male 2s: "what?! I'll show you! :angry: " *puffs up and sticks out chest provocatively*
3s: "oo, that stung a bit. whatever, it'll just make me stronger"
4w3s: "you'll never understand my pain!" :crying: :angry:
4w5s: *growls under breath, 30% pissed; 70 mortified*
5s: *wasn't paying attention and missed the comment completely*
p6s:  
cp6s: "what?! NO I'M NOT! :angry: " 
7s: "oo, that stung a bit. whatever, I'm still awesome  "
8w7s: 
* *











8w9: "hmph" *trudges back to cave dragging club behind back* 
9w8s: "hey, take it easy there" 
9w1s: (on the outside) :happy: (on the inside) :ninja:


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## Devrim (Jan 26, 2013)

I have to say when it comes to my reaction to criticism,
It's the Type 1 anger reaction for me.


As others may tell,
I don't handle criticism well xD


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## rajAs (Sep 14, 2012)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> 5s: *wasn't paying attention and missed the comment completely*


Lolled as hell at that point :laughing:


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## Paradigm (Feb 16, 2010)

How and when to give me criticism:
1. It's constructive and respectful. 
2. I don't harbor negative feelings towards you in the moment.
3. You are open to discussion about it.
4. I feel like you are making an effort to understand my way of things.

The last two are "more optional" than the first two. If I feel like I'm being insulted rather than criticized, I'll go into self-defense mode, which varies from complete ignoring to cold anger to outright yelling. Objectively, I know that insults can be valid criticism, but I just can't keep my calm at the time; I might consider it long after I've calmed down, but before then it just gets rejected. (And I'm a phobic 6 )


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## Tater Tot (May 28, 2012)

1: I am sorry for disappointing you. I feel like I have failed as a *insert whatever title they feel they are responsible of* and I will try harder to be a better *insert whatever title they feel they are responsible of*

2: Okay, that's alright, take it out on me.. I was just trying to help, but... I see that my help isn't wanted. :sad: So I guess I just won't bother you anymore.

3: Yeah. Okay, right. That's okay. Yeah, okay. Cool, that's fine.:happy: ..._WHO DOES THIS PERSON THINK THEY ARE, INSULTING ME LIKE THIS?!!!
_
4: Wow. Okay, really? That was extremely insensitive and cruel... just saying. Do you have any idea how much it hurts a person to hear that?

5:









6: No. *starts long speech arguing every single point in the history of mankind*

7: why are you even upset right now lol

8:









9: lol yeah you're probably right. Oh well!


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## Sina (Oct 27, 2010)

LOL

Personally, I welcome constructive criticism. It gives me an opportunity to improve. I have always taken objective criticism very well. Even if a few times I've been annoyed that my best wasn't good enough, I've pulled myself up by the bootstraps and taken the harsh critique of a hard taskmaster to heart and used it to get ahead. 

*
The criticism I will laugh off includes:-*

1. silly ad hominems that don't quite hit too far below the belt 
2. wimpy/whiny complaints cloaked as legit criticism. 
*
The 'criticism' that will get an angry response from me includes one or more of the following:-
*
1. Questioning my integrity without basis. Oh, I've totally done things that were 'unscrupulous', and I've always been open to people bitching about that. Hey! it's the truth. I own up to my shit. 

But, when I am acting in goodwill and it's misconstrued/the worst is assumed about me in a MAJOR way. That bullshit I don't tolerate. 

2. When non-constructive criticism/criticism lacking objectivity is expressed in an indirect, underhanded and passive aggressive way.

3. Outright disrespect, though I much prefer to point 2. right above. 

4. Lies presented as 'criticism'. Fuck that shit to hell and back. I am all for productive conflict and objective criticism as you can tell, but when people start lying while presenting it as criticism aimed at 'helping', I take it apart and slap them in the face with it. Dishonesty doesn't go down well with me.


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## Herp (Nov 25, 2010)

Tater Tot said:


> 6: No. *starts long speech arguing every single point in the history of mankind*


Wow, guilty as charged. :laughing:


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## Coburn (Sep 3, 2010)

Tater Tot said:


> 4: Wow. Okay, really? That was extremely insensitive and cruel... just saying. Do you have any idea how much it hurts a person to hear that?


Oh god. I hate people who pull this shit.


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## Helios (May 30, 2012)

I can take criticism very well if:

1. It's constructive and yields useful advice.
2. If the person is not just being flat out insulting and rude.
3. If I specifically asked for commentary on the matter.
4. If I am invested in you enough/value you enough to care about your opinion.

Generally I can take criticism very well, but there's always the occasional idiot that likes to criticise everyone but themselves of course.


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## Tater Tot (May 28, 2012)

Herp said:


> Wow, guilty as charged. :laughing:


It's definitely more of a cp6 thing but yeah, my brother has to argue every single point that he can think of before he can accept anything that anybody says. Which I don't understand because it would be so embarrassing for me if I put that much effort into an argument and ended up losing.


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## Herp (Nov 25, 2010)

Tater Tot said:


> It's definitely more of a cp6 thing but yeah, my brother has to argue every single point that he can think of before he can accept anything that anybody says. Which I don't understand because it would be so embarrassing for me if I put that much effort into an argument and ended up losing.


I'm a phobic six. 

I found that description funny because I remember being called out on my endless security measures and I was like "Well, *starts long speech about why the world is so confusing and etc*". It was not pretty. 


* *




I couldn't put a visitor message for you! That's me playing megaman. I tried to pass this stage to make a nice recording, but it's hard to record and play, so I just said "Screw this" and went with this not-so-perfect attempt. That was the last laser room, by the way.


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## Tater Tot (May 28, 2012)

Herp said:


> I'm a phobic six.
> 
> I found that description funny because I remember being called out on my endless security measures and I was like "Well, *starts long speech about why the world is so confusing and etc*". It was not pretty.
> 
> ...


I mentioned this to my brother and so he asked his friends if it was true and they all told him no. I'm thinking they're probably scared to death of saying the wrong thing to him. 


* *




Sorry, I just realized I had my profile set to friends only. XD I don't even remember setting it to that. Anyway, I've never played megaman but I know of it and it seems like the type of game I would like.


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## Swordsman of Mana (Jan 7, 2011)

Boss said:


> LOL
> Personally, I welcome constructive criticism. It gives me an opportunity to improve. I have always taken objective criticism very well. Even if a few times I've been annoyed that my best wasn't good enough, I've pulled myself up by the bootstraps and taken the harsh critique of a hard taskmaster to heart and used it to get ahead.
> *
> The criticism I will laugh off includes:-*
> ...


agreed with all of the above



> *
> The 'criticism' that will get an angry response from me includes one or more of the following:-
> *
> 1. Questioning my integrity without basis. Oh, I've totally done things that were 'unscrupulous', and I've always been open to people bitching about that. Hey! it's the truth. I own up to my shit.


yup, this gets me more than anything (perhaps I was wrong about you being an 8 fixer. the 8 fixers I know wouldn't give a shit about this)



> But, when I am acting in goodwill and it's misconstrued/the worst is assumed about me in a MAJOR way. That bullshit I don't tolerate.


I can live with being periodically misinterpreted. in fact, I don't care if the person is grateful at all (I give because I feel like it, the person's opinion is usually irrelevant), but when people constantly interpret everything in the worst possible light, they're just out to get you at that point. 



> 2. When non-constructive criticism/criticism lacking objectivity is expressed in an indirect, underhanded and passive aggressive way.


true dat!
:angry: :angry: :angry:



> 3. Outright disrespect, though I much prefer to point 2. right above.


same. in the past, I've been overly patient with this kind of behavior, thinking something along the lines of "perhaps they have a point and I should let them get to it". alas, they never do, so I've learned to call out this type of behavior early and often.
still, as you said, it's far preferable to point 2. I don't have time for all that sneaking around. 



> 4. Lies presented as 'criticism'. Fuck that shit to hell and back. I am all for productive conflict and objective criticism as you can tell, but when people start lying while presenting it as criticism aimed at 'helping', I take it apart and slap them in the face with it. Dishonesty doesn't go down well with me.


this is a tactic known as gaslighting, a common yet severe form of psychological abuse.


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## Chesire Tower (Jan 19, 2013)

I try to see if it's valid and if I think it is; I will apologise to the other person for my perceived shortcomings, thank them for their advice and proceed to fix it. If I really don't believe it is; I will find a 101 brilliantly constructed logical arguments all conveyed in eloquent speech, letting them know how wrong they are and be more than happy to help them, realize the error of their ways.


:tongue:


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## Dewymorning (Nov 24, 2012)

9w1 response.

*critism at 9w1*

"Ok, I will try to do better next time"

*9w1 spends several hours either thinking how the critism is wrong, and what they should have said to defend themselves etc. and also what if the criticism is right? How am I going to improve myself? I can't let them criticise me like that again.*


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## Sina (Oct 27, 2010)

Swordsman of Mana said:


> agreed with all of the above






> yup, this gets me more than anything (perhaps I was wrong about you being an 8 fixer. the 8 fixers I know wouldn't give a shit about this)


This has nothing to do with 1/8 fix. You may well be wrong in your assessment, but this isn't the reason. The most apathetic people when it comes to any kind of anger over seriously (key) having their integrity questioned, especially by someone they love/respect/trust, are 9s. No 8 would take that lying down. Nor would people with an 8 or 1 fix. 

Here's a quote from Timeless's excellent article:


> Morality wise, a Type Eight would say they have integrity instead of a strong moral code.


8s are also said to have a puritan/hedonist dichotomy. So, they actually are truth valuing and can have solid integrity which they don't appreciate having questioned in matters they feel strongly about, especially by people they trust. So, for example, I know an 8 who is monogamous and loves his gf. When she confronted him with a cheating accusation multiple times, all hell broke loose. That is the 8 brand of integrity. It ties in with truth and honesty, both of which they value in themselves and others. 

Now, here's another example. :laughing: People have told me to my face that I have no integrity. Some people have openly called me immoral/unscrupulous/ a con artist/ a fraud and more. That shit rolls off my back. In fact, I think it's funny. I like making people squirm. I don't care if someone thinks I have no "morals" or no "integrity". However, I am repeatedly blamed for a specific action that I haven't done (ties in with my dislike of fabricated bullshit) and it's a *serious* matter (this is key), you bet I'll hand your ass to you so hard you won't know what hit you. 




> I can live with being periodically misinterpreted. in fact, I don't care if the person is grateful at all (I give because I feel like it, the person's opinion is usually irrelevant), but when people constantly interpret everything in the worst possible light, they're just out to get you at that point.


Oh yeah, I don't care if random people misunderstand me. And, I surely don't care about being "owed" gratitude. I am not talking about "giving". I give because I can. I don't keep track of that. I am not doing it to earn favours or earn love or approval. But, when the very hand that feeds gets bitten, I don't put up with that either. I am no stinking martyr, nor do I care for such nonsense. 

Acting in goodwill wasn't a reference to generosity. It was a reference to not acting maliciously, and still having people suspect you and assume the worst about you. Too fuckin bad. I am a pretty fuckin optimistic person, and I do not suspect ill of people unless they give me a reason to. I expect others to have the balls to do the same. 

So, when someone simply assumes the worst about me every chance they get, it tells me they're full of shit. 


> true dat!
> :angry: :angry: :angry:


:wink:



> same. in the past, I've been overly patient with this kind of behavior, thinking something along the lines of "perhaps they have a point and I should let them get to it". alas, they never do, so I've learned to call out this type of behavior early and often.
> still, as you said, it's far preferable to point 2. I don't have time for all that sneaking around.


Yeah, it's amusing up to a point. But, then it just gets annoying. I don't have that kind of time to waste. 



> this is a tactic known as gaslighting, a common yet severe form of psychological abuse.


I've heard about this before. Not sure if that's what I was saying. I'll read my post again lol.


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## bearotter (Aug 10, 2012)

I analyze (usually in my head, but sometimes out loud) the nature of their criticism. It's pretty much in my head that most criticism of me has always been kind of pointless to me, because usually it is something I'm aware of and am not sure how to fix, and I'd rather hear suggestions that take into account the difficulty of the issue.


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## Kito (Jan 6, 2012)

My usual reaction to criticism:


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## Acerbusvenator (Apr 12, 2011)

Tater Tot said:


> 2: Okay, that's alright, take it out on me.. I was just trying to help, but... I see that my help isn't wanted. :sad: So I guess I just won't bother you anymore.


I hate it when people try to send you on a guilt trip. Especially when it is completely out of context or just from misinterpretation of what I've said or what my intention is (my enneagram 6 typed mother does this all the time). I just completely agree with their guilt trip statement instead.


> 4: Wow. Okay, really? That was extremely insensitive and cruel... just saying. Do you have any idea how much it hurts a person to hear that?


Ironically, this tends to be my enneagram 3 sister. Just makes me go "no, because I am incredibly unintelligent and non-understanding person and I could never understand anything such as this to the degree you do ". I really do hate it when people patronizes my knowledge.


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## cudibloop (Oct 11, 2012)

I smile, and either consider the criticism (if constructive) or get pissed off and mad at myself (if it's an ad hominem). If it's indirect/passive criticism I just lol.


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