# How do you feel when you're proven wrong?



## Selene (Aug 2, 2009)

This is a question for all the NT's:

How do you react (both cognitively and emotionally) when you're arguing with someone about something and they totally annihilate your argument?

Do you admit that you're wrong? Does your response depend on how attached you are to the subject?


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## Grey (Oct 10, 2009)

It absolutely depends on my attachment to the argument. While I'm usually just a bit embarrassed if someone can soundly counter my argument (mostly due to the fact that I feel 'stupid' if I had not thought of the points beforehand), I can concede the defeat on that level. If it's a more personal argument, however, I can become quite resistant, even though I can see exactly where they're coming from and how they are right. I have to make it a point to say that 'I'm wrong'.

I don't like serious debates, for the most part. I can usually see where my own position falters, as well as the other side's, but if I'm debating with someone I don't exactly believe has the same knowledge as I, I will become stubborn and refuse to back down. Unfortunately, however, most debates I have are horrible - they're very short lived, and they boil down to the other side not wanting to consider that they're wrong and descending into name-calling and verbal abuse.


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## 1057 (Apr 9, 2009)

if it's something that is concrete, like whether 2 + 2 = 4, i won't get upset for being proven wrong, i might feel a little defeated but then i'll just accept it as a learning experience and move on.

if it's something that is a matter of opinion, like whether or not cheating is wrong (just an example), there really is no right/wrong so i'm never bothered by it.

it also depends who i'm arguing with, if it's someone i don't like then obviously i'll feel a little more irked when they prove me wrong, but if it's a friend and it's just a light debate, i'm not worried.


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## Ventricity (Mar 30, 2009)

i´ll get embarrassed, and probably resort to humor to ease my utter failure


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## Linesky (Dec 10, 2008)

When somebody is really right in a debate and I am not...

If there's no way for me to add anything to it and change its course then I feel/am beaten, obviously.

I don't really take it to heart. Might be annoyed if it's really bad but if that happens it doesn't last so long since I prefer to give more attention to the thoughts evoked and continue on that. 

When someone's "giving the proof" I'm pretty much taken aback and hear it out, trying to keep a bit of peace around while listening ('cause when I'm still stubborn I tend to interrupt). 
If I have any thoughts to add or questions to ask then I'll do so, if not then that's about where that debate ends [in peace]. and where a new one may begin, lol.

I realized it annoys me more when someone thinks they're right but they're not (or not entirely) rather than if someone beats me by being right. I don't expect for me to always be right even if I'd like to.


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## Linesky (Dec 10, 2008)

Grey said:


> While I'm usually just a bit embarrassed if someone can soundly counter my argument (mostly due to the fact that I feel 'stupid' if I had not thought of the points beforehand), I can concede the defeat on that level.


Yeah, if I remember I actually knew what the other party said but wasn't 'there enough' to mention it, I do feel kind of stupid for it and try to 'retake that' / 'fix that up'. It can happen.


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## thehigher (Apr 20, 2009)

When I prove my intp girfriend wrong she trys to change the subject immediately. In fact, she consistently says "I don't want to talk about this".


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## Lucretius (Sep 10, 2009)

My opinions may change, but I am still always right. 

Nah, actually I don't tend to get emotionally invested in any topic of debate anymore. I make a conscious effort not to be.
I still can get a little embarrassed if I overlooked something important or am otherwise found to be arguing poorly. I generally try to be graceful and accept defeat when that happens.


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## Singularity (Sep 22, 2009)

Well, of course it depends. Mostly I think, "Wow, how could I have missed that?" and feel like my brain's not functioning correctly. However, other times I'm happy that now I know a more correct answer to something. 

Do I admit I am wrong? Well, perhaps not blatantly 100% of the time, but then again if they just annihilated my argument then it's obvious and I don't need to say it. I wouldn't normally continue to argue my side after I've been shown to be wrong, if that's what you mean. 

If I was very emotionally invested in something, then I would have more adjusting to do to integrate this new perspective into my view of reality.


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## Munchies (Jun 22, 2009)

I really dont care. But XXTJs seem to hate it, and cant admit it to themselves or something


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## Kevinaswell (May 6, 2009)

I love it.

It's the only thing better than being right.

(During the rare occasions that it happens...)


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## Tommy (Nov 25, 2009)

It depends on how much I've fought the battle of being right... If I have been dead sure about something, then proven wrong, I just accept it and humiliately leave it. If I hadn't been sure, I wouldn't have taken much offense.


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## thehigher (Apr 20, 2009)

haha to be honest I feel pretty shitty. I'm not gonna sit here and tell you I feel good when i am proven wrong...I'd lying lol. However, I understand the need to be proven wrong...and I understand that it helps me grow...so I don't mind it. But ...deep inside there is that feeling that says..."damnit".


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## angularvelocity (Jun 15, 2009)

Selene said:


> This is a question for all the NT's:
> 
> How do you react (both cognitively and emotionally) when you're arguing with someone about something and they totally annihilate your argument?
> 
> Do you admit that you're wrong? Does your response depend on how attached you are to the subject?


Moot question. NTs are never wrong. You should know that!

:tongue:

I don't like it when I'm wrong, but I acknowledge it with a "You are right" and then learn[process] from whatever they have said.


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## Skewed (Jul 14, 2009)

Right is right, wrong is wrong. As long as sufficient evidence is produced to prove me wrong, I am fine with it. However, when this happens it forces me into a position where I have to run through my thought process and check things out again to make sure the faulty thought process has not affected other ideas I may have. I suppose you could say I go into maintenance mode. I may be a little annoyed, at myself more than anything for missing that tidbit of information in the first place.

But it is usually very rare, I am normally getting the comment, "Why are you always right?"


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## NastyCat (Sep 20, 2009)

I just accept it. If they prove me wrong elegantly in the calmest possible manner, then I would respect them a little more than baseline.


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## danicx (Dec 5, 2009)

I feel grateful, humbled, inspired to learn more, and occasionally embarassed if my error is particularly reprehensible. But I am always above all glad for the clarification.


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## LeafStew (Oct 17, 2009)

I I realize that I'm wrong, I will be a little disappointed but I will openly admit it. It's something I had to work on a few years ago but I'm getting good at it. I know I'm right most of the time but I can't be always right..


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## Minty (Dec 5, 2009)

If they have truly proved me wrong and I can see their point-of-view I usually say, "Oh, okay! That makes sense." And I feel enlightened as well as a sense of respect of the person who taught me something new. 

Whenever I think I'm right and the other party can't prove to me they're right but they keep trying without making any real progress--it can get ugly.


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## LeelooDallas (Sep 15, 2009)

it rarely happens with me.
not because i'm always right but because i already know there's a grey area between true and false when it comes to subjective things and a similar grey area when it comes to so called unquestionable objective facts..

so usually when someone goes "AHA i have proven you wrong" i'm like "mheh, whatever" .


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