Someone Needs Help Determining Their Instinctual Variant (me)

Someone Needs Help Determining Their Instinctual Variant (me)

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This is a discussion on Someone Needs Help Determining Their Instinctual Variant (me) within the What's my Enneagram type? forums, part of the Enneagram Personality Theory Forum category; So at this point, I feel like I could either be SP/SX or SX/SP. I need help figuring out what ...

  1. #1

    Someone Needs Help Determining Their Instinctual Variant (me)

    So at this point, I feel like I could either be SP/SX or SX/SP. I need help figuring out what strongly differentiates those two specific variant stackings, to help me better understand why one would make more sense for me than the other. I appreciate all of your help! :)



  2. #2

    It would help to get this thread moved to the Enneagram section @Stephen . Thanks:)

    OP, have a look at the sp/sx and sx/sp instinct variants descriptions here:
    1. Typewatch Enneagram: Typewatch Enneagram Type Descriptions

    2. the enneagram ...info from the underground

    Also, you'll receive more responses/insights once your thread is moved to the appropriate forum. Tell me what you think after you've read the descriptions.

  3. #3

    Quote Originally Posted by Boss View Post
    It would help to get this thread moved to the Enneagram section @Stephen . Thanks:)

    OP, have a look at the sp/sx and sx/sp instinct variants descriptions here:
    1. Typewatch Enneagram: Typewatch Enneagram Type Descriptions

    2. the enneagram ...info from the underground

    Also, you'll receive more responses/insights once your thread is moved to the appropriate forum. Tell me what you think after you've read the descriptions.
    Oh wow. I didn't realize that also with each variant there were different levels of your sub-strength. Like with the sx/sp (weak sp, midrange, or strong). Its been really hard for me to clearly determine whether I'm an SP/SX or SX/SP. Since I am more withdrawn, but at the same time I still feel a really strong desire to connect with someone in depth. Thank you for the resources, by the way. I'll have to read more into this.
    sleepyhead thanked this post.

  4. #4

    Quote Originally Posted by Grac3 View Post
    Oh wow. I didn't realize that also with each variant there were different levels of your sub-strength. Like with the sx/sp (weak sp, midrange, or strong). Its been really hard for me to clearly determine whether I'm an SP/SX or SX/SP. Since I am more withdrawn, but at the same time I still feel a really strong desire to connect with someone in depth. Thank you for the resources, by the way. I'll have to read more into this.
    Regarding your desire to connect with someone in depth, is it consistent? In other words, once the relationship is established and stable, do you continue to want to merge in this way, or does it dissipate and then you start to focus on other things?
    The Great One, LotusBlossom and sleepyhead thanked this post.

  5. #5

    @Stephen Well, not even necessarily in a romantic relationship type of way. Just any kind of friendship/relationship where I can feel some deeper kind of connection. And I do want that to last. But I am more hesitant about jumping into relationships if I don't feel that it has a strong potential to last. It's like in that way I have the "There could always be someone better for me around the corner" mentality. So recently I've just been looking for stronger frienships, and if those stem off into relationships, then that's how I would prefer it to go. Your question is a bit difficult for me to answer because I don't feel like I've been in a relationship where I've ever felt so strongly for the person that I couldn't see myself being without them. I could kind of see myself having mixed emotions even if a relationship did feel right though. Probably because it seems like when anything feels right, it's not going to last. And then I guess I would feel cautious about letting myself get too attached for fear of it not working out. I guess that's where my 4-6-9 tendencies come in.

    So, would you say SP/SX?
    Stephen thanked this post.

  6. #6

    Quote Originally Posted by Grac3 View Post
    @Stephen Well, not even necessarily in a romantic relationship type of way. Just any kind of friendship/relationship where I can feel some deeper kind of connection. And I do want that to last. But I am more hesitant about jumping into relationships if I don't feel that it has a strong potential to last. It's like in that way I have the "There could always be someone better for me around the corner" mentality. So recently I've just been looking for stronger frienships, and if those stem off into relationships, then that's how I would prefer it to go. Your question is a bit difficult for me to answer because I don't feel like I've been in a relationship where I've ever felt so strongly for the person that I couldn't see myself being without them. I could kind of see myself having mixed emotions even if a relationship did feel right though. Probably because it seems like when anything feels right, it's not going to last. And then I guess I would feel cautious about letting myself get too attached for fear of it not working out. I guess that's where my 4-6-9 tendencies come in.

    So, would you say SP/SX?
    I consider myself sx/so, but I used to think I was so/sp. When I found a relationship where I felt that deep connection, it became very apparent that I was leading sx, so that might be something that's more apparent to you when you are eventually in a deep relationship.

    I put a lot of energy into my relationship. Those who are sp/sx will appear sx in the beginning of a relationship, and once it feels stable and solid, they will focus that energy on other things.

    I was as you describe too, always keeping relationships at arm's length and making sure I never got so connected that loss would hurt me. It turned out to be the wrong approach for me.
    Jawz, LotusBlossom, sleepyhead and 1 others thanked this post.


     

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