[Tega1]

Having 8 wing does it sometimes contradict you? Type 9 are peaceful, passive, gentle. With the type 8 you become assertive and aggressive. Over the years I think I've been like this. I was always scared what my anger could do to people or myself. I've punched a glass window when I was 14 I was annoyed at the way I was being treated by one of my siblings. I'm really lucky that I didn't get any cuts or scratches inside of myself. I've always had this aggressiveness that can be scary to others. Hurting other people and not caring about it. But I can also be quiet, gentle and people will assume I wouldn't cause any harm. This type seems to be the total opposite. Is it better to learn how to be assertive? I'm always scared of hurting others if pushed to far and hurting myself be allowing people to walk over me.

[Swordsman of Mana]

Having 8 wing does it sometimes contradict you? Type 9 are peaceful, passive, gentle. With the type 8 you become assertive and aggressive. Over the years I think I've been like this. I was always scared what my anger could do to people or myself. I've punched a glass window when I was 14 I was annoyed at the way I was being treated by one of my siblings. I'm really lucky that I didn't get any cuts or scratches inside of myself. I've always had this aggressiveness that can be scary to others. Hurting other people and not caring about it. But I can also be quiet, gentle and people will assume I wouldn't cause any harm. This type seems to be the total opposite. Is it better to learn how to be assertive? I'm always scared of hurting others if pushed to far and hurting myself be allowing people to walk over me.

how frequent is your aggression? your self description sounds kinda like an 8w9

[Tega1]

It isn't frequent. I think it more when someone says something about me or a family member and that makes me angry. I think when I do not voice my feelings I become like that. That is when my anger becomes like that. Most of the time it is when someone says something about my family or personally to me which pushes me to the edge.

[Swordsman of Mana]

It isn't frequent. I think it more when someone says something about me or a family member and that makes me angry. I think when I do not voice my feelings I become like that. That is when my anger becomes like that. Most of the time it is when someone says something about my family or personally to me which pushes me to the edge.

I see, that makes sense

[Tega1]

I remember there was a post put you picture and the person below will type you. I remember you typed me ISFP 9w8 sx/sp How could you tell? A few people say I look like an INFP.

[Swordsman of Mana]

I remember there was a post put you picture and the person below will type you. I remember you typed me ISFP 9w8 sx/sp How could you tell? A few people say I look like an INFP.

I don't remember the picture

[Tega1]

The second one is the one you saw. The first one I took it yesterday.

[madhatter]

The very nature of 9w8 is contradictory. It's hard to reconcile these two very different sides of yourself with one another. To be more assertive without damage, it's important to realize that assertiveness =/= aggression. These two concepts often blur together in the perspective of an average 9.

[Jawz]

I think having a 9 with an 8 wing makes me a walking time bomb ... someone with a relatively short fuse under stress ... but extremely calm and collected at others. Sometimes the smallest things trigger a violent emotional reaction in me both externally and internally. At times I can act out over the smallest things like someone not leaving a door open for me, I'd feel all vengeful and nasty for a while. But then, I was also in a major car accident which crippled me and I forgave the woman who did it.

I can go extended periods without ever feeling even a little bit of stress. But then there are times when I start feeling conflict oriented. I've noticed that the "worst" of my type 8 nature comes out when someone tries to control me. When I'm told to do something that I already wanted to do and was ready to do it on my own, I actually have a contradictory response to not do it, or lash out at the person for having the nerve to tell me to do it. It's always like "I KNOW WHAT I HAVE TO DO, STOP TELLING ME." And then within minutes of the freakish outburst, I'd become catatonic for a while before realizing my mistake and starting to feel guilty.

When at work, I seek harmony within my department and I act like the protector / nurturer of my territory. I've been told that I'm relatively territorial at work and it's because I feel in control of my domain and especially when things are going well, I don't like outside influences. However, my department's efficiency is my priority and I try to make the best with what I've been allocated. I rarely start arguments, or get involved in conflict. I would rather take whatever hits are sent my way to a point. I also look to alleviate the emotional atmosphere of my work environment through group activities like lunches / dinners etc. I like to be friends with the people at work. If any kind of conflict brews, then I will stand up to fight for the rights of my colleagues when the opportunity arises. If not, then I will become one of those people who motivates others to fight for their rights - without getting involved myself.

Overall, I am peaceful, passive, calm, serene, passive aggressive, assertive and aggressive all depending on the situation.

[alionsroar]

Is it better to learn how to be assertive?
Yes. Even if you are another type. I think being assertive means that you are neither letting yourself get walked over, nor walking over someone else. It probably involves understanding what and why you are feeling or wanting, so being in touch with the gut instinct, and being able to communicate it effectively.

E9 types are only passive or passive-aggressive (or maybe aggressive for the wing 8 types) at average or unhealthy levels. At healthy levels, they are "dynamic, assertive, and open to change."