[Enneagram Type 9] Rage triad

Rage triad

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This is a discussion on Rage triad within the Type 9 Forum - The Peacemaker forums, part of the Body Triad - Types 8,9,1 category; This is something I must get off my chest. How do 9's keep their anger down since not only is ...

  1. #1

    Rage triad

    This is something I must get off my chest. How do 9's keep their anger down since not only is the 9 driven by rage but so are both of their wings? I'm a 5w4 and even my patience is limited.
    Swordsman of Mana and 2983 thanked this post.



  2. #2
    Type 9w1

    Keeping anger down, is actually the fear of conflict. So it's a kind of mind-set and a vicious circle. Could erupt some day... it's a fight between two ego's in one-self: an angry ego wanting to explode at any given moment (gut) and the calming/soothing ego (heart/head?) that doesn't want get involved in that rollercoaster of feelings. So the latter is ignorance and emotional dissociation. The emotional dissociation is a refuge to calmer waters: no worries, all is quiet :-)

    An enneagram practioner once told me, a 9 is actually an 8 in sheep's clothes.
    Explosive inside, but some heavy concrete (grown with cosy fur) that prevents explosion to the outside :-)
    Father of Dragons thanked this post.

  3. #3
    Type 9w1

    Anger generally just worsens whatever you are angry about

    I yell at people in my head as a form of expression.

    I know I deal with a lot of my anger by shifting it to understanding instead.
    The shift to understanding (their point of view) absolves a lot of my anger.

    Honestly, I don't get that angry either. I generally just move on.


    I remember reading somewhere that 9s like to cling to little bromides to deal with life. This saying epitomizes that idea and honestly, how angry can you get if you take a breather properly assess the situation? Life's life. Get over it :)

    Keep on Keeping on.
    and so forth :P

    Also, (though, I'm not too sure about this) I think the 9 lack of identity contributes to a perception that the 9 anger is unimportant - so why express it? (Especially in the unhealthy types)
    A healthy expression of anger is also important if the 9 wants to properly integrate to three.

    Healthy 9s just release a lot of their anger.

    Tangent:
     

    If you want help "dealing with your emotions"
    My mother is a "Life Coach" ;)
    and she introduced me to something called The Energy Leadership Index.

    It teaches you how to use different perspectives to transform Catabolic energies (like depression/anger) into constructive Anabolic energies like Joy & Peace.

    It sounds a bit Kumbaya but it's actually berry interesting.
    (Interestingly enough, I spend most of my time at level 5 peace - but this is weighed down by a level 2 anger.)
    nottie thanked this post.

  4. #4

    The motivations of 5 and 9 are so very different, 5's separate from their anger but damn well know it's there, 9s deny their anger and pretend it's not there.

    If you don't acknowledge your anger, it's freaken easy to keep it down *pleasant smile*

  5. #5

    We're driven by rage? News to me. I've been disappointed by people before. Been frustrated by them even. But I don't get angry, let alone "rage".

    Hooray for aux-Fe and dom-Ni I suppose. *shrug* Seems like such a waste of energy to me, to get that worked up about something.

    Most people who know me irl tell me on a constant basis that I'm the most peaceful person they know. A supervisor at work during my last annual evaluation told me she envied how calm and collected I am in dealing with customers. Friends invite me over for dinner so that they can relax, as if somehow being around me brings them a sense of peace. (I still don't know how that works.)

    How are we supposedly "rage" driven anyway? 9s are all about finding peace and harmony, hence the conflict avoidance and such.
    MBTI Enthusiast thanked this post.

  6. #6

    Quote Originally Posted by GoodOldDreamer View Post
    How are we supposedly "rage" driven anyway? 9s are all about finding peace and harmony, hence the conflict avoidance and such.
    Not exactly, the underlying issue is anger, not rage that insinuates something bigger.

    Gut types are all anger based, 8s express it forcefully, 1 express it more with judgement both at self and others, 9s however are frequently out of touch with it and try not to express it at all, when we do it is frequently with stubbornness and resistance to feeling pressured.

    Your attitude of it seeming like a waste of energy and not something to get worked up over is so incredibly 9, actually your entire post is xD

    A typical question asked in regards to typing people with Enneagram is "which do you find you have most issues with; anxiety, anger or shame" representing each of the centres, and the typical 9 response is "none really, but I especially do not have any issues with anger!" We are predictable like that

    OP this may show 9s relationship with anger better:

    On a much deeper level the underlying current of "anger" in gut types is traced to the eternal fustration of not being able to see themselves well due to being overly present in their bodies, similar to the fustration of groping in the dark. Inner needs like cultivating an identity have trouble being met with an unconscious sense of self, which in conjunction with being "held back" by their inertness makes it hard to get out from inside of them what they really mean and how they really feel. This constant low-idle "groping in the dark" rhythmic body-consciousness from which fustration and anger springs is the primary backdrop of the "overly present in their body" gut triad, similar to anxiety and shame for the head and image triads respectively. Although nines may deny their annoyance and irritation as forms of anger, they loathe being pushed or bothered, and especially anything that even faintly smells of obligation. Like eights and ones a nine's underlying fustration is there but instead gets redirected into less visceral forms like stubbornness and digging in their heels. If they are dragged into doing something they grit their teeth and make the best of it. Nines have an easier time accessing sadness, fear, hurt, confusion, numbness, than anger itself though ironically they get mad at themselves for saying yes when they didn't mean to.
    MBTI Enthusiast, nigborg and Father of Dragons thanked this post.

  7. #7

    Quote Originally Posted by GoodOldDreamer View Post
    We're driven by rage? News to me. I've been disappointed by people before. Been frustrated by them even. But I don't get angry, let alone "rage".

    How are we supposedly "rage" driven anyway? 9s are all about finding peace and harmony, hence the conflict avoidance and such.
    Exactly. We are part of the rage triad, it's true. "Eights tend to act out rage, Nines tend to deny it, and Ones tend to repress it." We are driven by rage just the same as Eights and Ones are, only our actions are dictated by suppressing rage. The fact that we feel rage so rarely means something is going on in our unconscious to remove it. A lot of work is done on our behalf in order to ignore rage. Remember, the absence of something can be a driving force. Just like some terminally ill patients are driven to do things they've never done before by imminent death. We are driven by imminent rage, and we do everything in our power to ignore or avoid it.

    @ OP: We tend to keep our anger down through a myriad of ways, many of which cannot even be described. We see all sides of a situation equally, so we can't get angry at someone or something when we see the other side of it, too. We mostly suppress it because we believe that open anger can lead to what we fear most: separation from those we love. With that fear nested deep in our minds, we do anything we can to contain it, ignore it, minimize it. Sometimes it involves numbing out and "forgetting" our anger. Of course, when we use outlets like exercise, writing, etc. to let our aggressions out slowly, it becomes much easier to go for a longer period of time without blowing up.
    Out0fAmmo, GoodOldDreamer, zenity and 1 others thanked this post.

  8. #8

    Quote Originally Posted by Sonny View Post
    A typical question asked in regards to typing people with Enneagram is "which do you find you have most issues with; anxiety, anger or shame" representing each of the centres, and the typical 9 response is "none really, but I especially do not have any issues with anger!" We are predictable like that
    Hmm. I think it's more a matter of "anger" being the one out of that list that stands out. Like, if someone doesn't have high anxiety or shame, what are they left with then to choose from? "Whatever remains, no matter how implausible, must then be the truth."

    Although, tbh, I believe most 9s are 9s because of the conflict avoidance more so than any issues regarding "anger". That's how I think of myself as a 9, anyway. I'm very aware of how averse to conflict I am, and how I strive for peace and harmony. You can even see it in my motto in my sig below. "Play nice, children of the corn!"

    I think anger would be more of an issue for other types, particularly those who either instigate or chase after conflicts themselves. I suppose someone could think of being a 9 from the perspective of having a certain lack of anger, but that takes the main point away, IMHO.
    MBTI Enthusiast thanked this post.

  9. #9

    Quote Originally Posted by MBTI Enthusiast View Post
    Exactly. We are part of the rage triad, it's true. "Eights tend to act out rage, Nines tend to deny it, and Ones tend to repress it." We are driven by rage just the same as Eights and Ones are, only our actions are dictated by suppressing rage.
    Extending from that, unless a conscious decision was made to acknowledge our feelings of anger in a positive way I would expect that when a 9 does outwardly express anger it would be the wing that was coming into play. Hence why typically (and naturally in extreme situations) the 9w8 would express explosive aggression while the 9w1 would express seething judgement.

    Would you agree?
    MBTI Enthusiast and GoodOldDreamer thanked this post.

  10. #10

    Quote Originally Posted by GoodOldDreamer View Post
    Although, tbh, I believe most 9s are 9s because of the conflict avoidance more so than any issues regarding "anger". That's how I think of myself as a 9, anyway. I'm very aware of how averse to conflict I am, and how I strive for peace and harmony. You can even see it in my motto in my sig below. "Play nice, children of the corn!"

    I think anger would be more of an issue for other types, particularly those who either instigate or chase after conflicts themselves. I suppose someone could think of being a 9 from the perspective of having a certain lack of anger, but that takes the main point away, IMHO.
    Totally, there are non-gut types that would be more inclined to express anger than a 9; 2s would be capable if they felt used, 4s would be capable if they felt hurt, 6s would be capable as well I expect although I'm not sure of the motivator maybe trapped or attacked, it's just that anger isn't going to be something that is a core issue for them as the motivation comes from another place.

    I agree that conflict is the core 9 issue, it's part of the conflict avoidance that stops us from allowing ourselves to express, or even feel anger, because we fear it will create conflict, and for very good reason of course!
    MBTI Enthusiast and GoodOldDreamer thanked this post.


 

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