[How Do You KNOW]

Um... I change my mind. I like 4s. I feel like this won't stop changing until I'm married or something.

[Curiously]

A healthy 5 + A healthy 8 seem like such an unstoppable, dynamic, powerful couple/duo/team.

[wayupnorth]

Wow - the 5-9 pair describes my relationship so well it was kind of creepy.

And we both travel for work and spend weeks apart at a time. It sounds in this description to be a death sentence but also it works really well for us because the distance would be really unbearable if we couldn't stand the separation. Although we had a talk about this not long ago when we didn't see each other for 8 weeks. It was just too long and the communication has to improve or what connection do we have?

It is really odd because we grow apart while apart physically (or at least I do - the 9), but then we meet and it's like instant happy.
I presented the situation like a gas tank to him and charted it out how full my "love tank" is (yes cheesy, but he understood!).

We really run the risk of living like roomates and leading separate lives. And that happened and took a lot of soulsearching to work through. I have to force the team/couple ways on him.

[johro]

Hello,
I don't know anything much about Enneagrams. I came out as type 2; My MBTI is INFJ. I'm not sure this really makes sense, seems a little incompatible. Can anyone give me a few insights or whatever? Thanks

[sleepyhead]

Hello,
I don't know anything much about Enneagrams. I came out as type 2; My MBTI is INFJ. I'm not sure this really makes sense, seems a little incompatible. Can anyone give me a few insights or whatever? Thanks

Head over to the 2 forum and start having a look at the 2 descriptions with wings and see if you feel it represents your personality type. One thing you'll want to keep in mind is that you can't really type yourself reliably with tests for the enneagram, so the best way to make sure you're the type the test says you are is to keep reading about the descriptions and narrowing down which ones you identify with most. Pay attention to your motivations and look at all the types because there's a good chance you could be something either than 2.

The forums have some good excerpts from books but I think most people who are more familiar with the enneagram will tell you that going out and looking at some books will give you a much more complete look at all the different types.

Type 2 Forum - The Helper

[johro]

Actually I am a Type 5 (I misread something) but that doesn't seem to match with INFJ. Any NF's in this Type 5 group?

[sleepyhead]

Actually I am a Type 5 (I misread something) but that doesn't seem to match with INFJ. Any NF's in this Type 5 group?

I know there's quite a number of INFJ 5's active on PerC. I'm one, but I don't really read the INFJ stuff much. I'm much more interested in the enneagram.

[Rune]

quickly forgetting those positive feelings when the person is away. Nines easily get into an out of sight, out of mind state where the other might as well not exist if they are not physically together.
I have reached a point of near numbness when away from him because our relationship hasn't manifested in the physical world yet.. but I think about him all the time..
I can say that I become confused by our unspoken relationship, and wonder if I'm just imagining things, and I get lonely and start getting close to other guys..
I'm convinced that our relationship is real now.. ^_^

Nines can also idealize the other so much that when they get together, the Five cannot really live up to the image that the Nine has of them in their imagination.
I wouldn't say he can't live up to my idealization.. I love him for who he is..
The problem here is that sometimes he is too perfect, and because of this, I feel intimidated..
My low self-esteem begins to eat at me..
I have such a hard time accepting that he loves me.. >.<
He means so much to me, that losing him is terrifying..
To be with him, and then lose him..
I'm such a coward. :'(

Fives, on the other hand, can become frustrated by the on again, off again attentions of the Nine and begin to become cynical and pessimistic about the relationship, analyzing the Nine and intellectually dissecting the relationship both as a defense from being hurt and as a way to express anger over their disappointment.

I've been afraid this sort of thing might happen.. o.o
I think that generally, both 5 and 9 are mature enough to work through problems when they truly love one another..

Both types can be disconnected from themselves and from the other, living in projections and imagination rather than seeing the other as they are.

Yeh.. This has been a concern too..
We both seem to have a problem with getting too involved with our hobbies.. :o


Work and solitary interests can take the Five's attention, and the pursuit of peace and more supportive relationships can draw the Nine away.

This.
I can be surprisingly emotionally needy for a 9.. seriously.. I shock myself sometimes when I feel a need to cling. :x
I know that I want to answer my calling to do something for the world/people.. I sort of hope he will join me in this quest.. I don't think that would be too far from the realm of possibilities. :)

Also, I wouldn't say he is the typical solo 5.. but he is very dedicated to things I am not dedicated to.. and these things are soooo important to him that I feel sort of.. left out?
I strive to learn more about his hobbies to remedy this, but he's so talented and intelligent that I don't stand a chance as an opponent.. :(
However, I do have skills as a promoter/organizer. :D

Unless there is an intense reason to see each other frequently, the stubbornness, inertia, and autonomy issues of the Nine will mix with the withdrawal, detachment, and indifference of the Five and the relationship will wither away.

Actually, this has been my biggest worry lately.. :(
We have an "underground" relationship.. and so things could easily fade with no structure..
I'm trying to remedy this by developing more Fe.. v.v;
He seems to respond to my Fi quite positively, though.. :)




Omfg..
Such a relief to know that this wasn't just my imagination.. ;-;
Our love has been extremely intense and confusing..
We get jealous.. which is probably bizarre for both of us.. lol..
I tried to walk away because I didn't understand his feelings for me, but our love for one another is too intense. ^^;
We have such an awesome understanding for one another.. an unspoken connection..

[Curiously]

I'm a big proponent of healthy 5 + healthy 4 pairings, too.

There's something to be said about how healthy 4s bring me to life when I am in their presence.

It's a dance. And I like to dance. I have the 4-wing, what can I say?

[Maybe]

A healthy 5 + A healthy 8 seem like such an unstoppable, dynamic, powerful couple/duo/team.

Stop feeding my fantasy... O:)