how do you show that you care for someone?
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8Thanks This is a discussion on Care, Care deeply within the Type 4 Forum - The Individualist forums, part of the Heart Triad - Types 2,3,4 category; how do you show that you care for someone?...

how do you show that you care for someone?
the extension of my feeling toward another is strenuous,(for fear of misunderstanding and sebsequent abandonment)yet in the rarity that i divulge warmth of feeling upon another, i do so with all passion and love unreserved.
To care for them as if they were myself.
If you doesn't have money/shelter, whats mine is yours.
If a friend is about to get in to a fight or bullied, no matter what the opposition nor the number, I will defend them with all of my being to my dying breath.
Drive for many hours and stay up all night just so you can have someone's shoulder to cry on.
Of course I realize that deep down inside this is what I desire from my ideal lover. My romantic fantasy.

Expressing emotions has always been difficult for me as a kid. I usually am always holding something back and am afraid to let the person know how I really care deep down inside. It is like this fear of being exposed naked and them seeing my emotions and who I am if I open to them, so I tend to protect my emotions by appearing cold and not letting people know how I feel.
As I been getting older I have learned that people are not mind readers and not to assume people know you care. Life is about sacrafices. I have learned that it is ok to let go and share part of your emotions and inner world with others if in return they get some hint to what you really feel about them.
I also don't like showing emotions and I never did. I do it through small gestures that could easily be interpreted as normal human kindness. I'm ashamed of myself when I show affection, but I'm also ashamed of myself when I don't.
Physical affection mostly. I feel very uncomfortable expressing affection towards anyone other than children and my romantic partner, and occasionally my mother. I try to tell them good things about themselves, make them feel good about themselves, give lots of physical affection, and to my partner, write letters, texts, poems, whatever, expressing my soul and how much I love him (so deep he often doesn't understand what I'm trying to say).
I tell them I love them and I give lots of meaningfull good hugs. I also look at them with loving eyes and listen to there worries. I am honest with them.
Being nice to them, I would suppose.
In a sense, I don't try to show a person anything. If I care for someone, I will automatically do whatever it is that they want. If they want a hug, I will hug them (however stiffly); if they want to go out to eat, I will help them decide where, and will most likely pay; if they're busy, I will help; if they're bored, I'll entertain them. I'd be something like a servant/assistant, maybe?
You could also say I don't do anything at all. I care for very, very few people, so it's not like I run around being nice to everyone.
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