Have you helped out today?( Let's talk about it!)

**Destiny Lund** · 06-24-2012 07:34 PM

When I help people out, it's usually just a bunch of little things. Instead of doing something huge for someone every once in a while, I guess I just naturally go kinda out of my way for a bunch of little stuff, friends or people who I don't really know. When it's somebody I don't know, I can just tell on their faces how bad of a day they're having or that they're in a rough spot in their life. My heart always calls out to these people. Some people don't realize that you can care about somebody you don't know. I think that if you don't get pleasure out of helping people, that something's wrong. You should feel good about doing good. What better time to be in a good mood- for materialistic reasons? I prefer not. A couple examples of me doing good that would be recent: helping someone move for nothing in return, buying my friend pain pills because she had a migraine during work & was absolutely broke, doing lots of research on the internet for my cousin concerning a certain company to make sure she doesn't get scammed, etc. Overflow, your intentions of doing all you can to do something good for someone is great & very admirable. Though, I'm just someone to believe that when it comes to true love, you should never let go. I don't believe in the whole "If you let it go & it comes back to you..." crap. I believe that when times get hard, it's an even bigger incentive to fight & keep close. I see it as a test of the relationship. Nothing should be able to break true love. Though, I also believe that there are many forms of love. I believe that there are some people in your life that you are most definitely meant to have & be with.... for a short period of time. She may have already spent all of the time that she was supposed to in your life. Some love is temporary, some love is eternal. Everything happens for a reason. I hope the best for you. :-)

**Loveternity** · 06-24-2012 11:22 PM

Originally Posted by Destiny Lund

Overflow, your intentions of doing all you can to do something good for someone is great & very admirable. Though, I'm just someone to believe that when it comes to true love, you should never let go. I don't believe in the whole "If you let it go & it comes back to you..." crap. I believe that when times get hard, it's an even bigger incentive to fight & keep close. I see it as a test of the relationship. Nothing should be able to break true love. Though, I also believe that there are many forms of love. I believe that there are some people in your life that you are most definitely meant to have & be with.... for a short period of time. She may have already spent all of the time that she was supposed to in your life. Some love is temporary, some love is eternal. Everything happens for a reason. I hope the best for you. :-)

I think I should clear a few things up, even though talking about this hurts... I tried to make myself feel better by briefly mentioning it, but I guess I was naive to think I could "sum it up".

1) This is a temporary breakup. We still love each other.

2) She needs to sort out some issues of her own without me. Trust me on this.

3) Although I'm temporarily not keeping close, I'm still fighting. This is a long distance relationship and I'm saving every freaking penny (I'm eating barely enough to get through the day, I've quit smoking and coffee, etc.) to get enough money to visit her one day.

4) I have faith in her sorting things out, but even in the worst case scenario I will still do everything in my power to make her happy until I stop breathing even if I become just a friend.

*sigh* Why am I talking about this... ._.

**Femmefatale** · 06-25-2012 02:05 AM

@Overflow: Thanks for including me in this.

Atm, I can't help anyone. Not even myself. I feel empty mostly... with jolts of pain every once in a while. Then sometimes it goes away and I feel a relief for a second or two. Things I don't want to tell has happened. Things that makes me feel ill to my core. I will survive. I feel unsure about the future... I don't know what kind of appointment I'm sitting here waiting for. I guess I should leave the waiting room.

**UniqueFinallyAmongPeers** · 06-25-2012 06:37 AM

Hi there guys and gals :smile:

The kind of help I give comes in two forms, minor and major. It is not measured in how much I had to do, how intricate it was or how hard it was, but rather how emotionally important it was to the person I helped.

I've done countless minor things, to the point where I can't remember any specific one occasion. So I don't know what do mention there.

As for the major things, my very strict sense of privacy and confidentiality blocks me from telling you anything. People have told me I sort many things as more private and confidential than they do, but when people tell me things (or for that matter when I pick up on things they think or feel without them telling me) I guard that carefully. Doesn't matter if I talk about it in broad terms without any specifics or not, it just doesn't sit right with me.

So either it's a minor thing, which I don't remember and thus can't tell you; or it's a major thing, which I most certainly remember and thus won't tell you.

**Hunny Bunny** · 06-25-2012 06:38 AM

Originally Posted by Femmefatale

@Overflow: Thanks for including me in this.

Atm, I can't help anyone. Not even myself. I feel empty mostly... with jolts of pain every once in a while. Then sometimes it goes away and I feel a relief for a second or two. Things I don't want to tell has happened. Things that makes me feel ill to my core. I will survive. I feel unsure about the future... I don't know what kind of appointment I'm sitting here waiting for. I guess I should leave the waiting room.

I know exactly how this feels. Just wanted to say I can relate and you aren't alone! *hand on shoulder*

**Malachi** · 06-25-2012 02:03 PM

@Overflow I'm confused now because I'm pretty sure I'm a 2w3 and than 7w6 but 7's hate giving up their freedom to help others while twos are all about giving up freedom. It seems I contradict myself at a fundamental level. But both the 2w3 and 7w6 descriptions match me to a T. I even have had the issue of feeling like people only see me as a fun loving guy and that they ignore my deep side. Which I'm ding to show. maybe I'm a 7w6 than a 2w3 and my sense I need to help others is constantly fighting my desire to have freedom. But i'm not that independent. I struggle being independent and that's something attributed to both my "types". What do you make of that?

**Loveternity** · 06-25-2012 02:39 PM

@Malachi, that sounds similar to how I imagine my 2w1 and 6w7 fighting to the death. xD Especially when it comes to asking someone for help for my own issues (2w1 says "No way, I'm not going to burden anyone with this", 6w7 says "You need their opinions, open up!").

But yeah, I can imagine how 2 and 7 can conflict. I see that you created a thread for your tritype back in January without replies. There's a What's my Enneagram type? forum section now, just fill the questionnaire and wait for answers. I'll give it a shot even though I don't feel too confident in my Enneagram knowledge.

**CptKickerCutleg** · 06-25-2012 05:36 PM

Made a schizophrenic hallucinate for her own benefit by seeing a wolf that protected her by taking the other halucinations away.
I made a psychopath depressed and thus showed him that it is only difficult, not impossible, to sympathise.
I massaged a female friend to sleep when she was so stressed that she actually broke down in front of me.
I helped a friend during a time when he was grieving for his closest relative.
I regularly keep up communications with people just to let them know that somebody cares.

None of this compares to the balm it gives me, but I don't care how much it makes my hands stop shaking or the shadows seem lighter, I see myself as sacrifice for other peoples' happiness, anything I gain is just a bonus.

**brendog10** · 06-25-2012 07:45 PM

Helping has been something that I have done my whole life. As far back as I can remember I've helped people with anything and everything. To the point that I feel it became a problem and I was no longer taking care of myself or growing on my own.

but that is behind me . I have been a sort of therapist to all my friends and family at some time or another in particular one of my best friends and I got close while I helped her deal with a bad relationship she was in. Further more now that I out of school I have started working as a counselor for drug addicts and alcoholics so my work is to help people work through the toughest time in their lives.