Negging

Urban Dictionary: negging

Low-grade insults meant to undermine the self-confidence of a woman so she might be more vulnerable to your advances. This is something no decent guy would do. They say that the assholes get the girls, but I can spot negging a mile away and I reject these fuckers straight off.

^a quote from the above link. (in case you guys think this is my opinion or something)

I've actually seen guides on 'How to neg a beautiful woman so you stand a chance'.

So women, have men used this technique on you? Do you recognize it immediately? Have you ever fallen for it?

And men, do you use this method? has it been successful?

It's been tried on me but because I know what negging is, it doesn't work. This way of flirting gives me the impression the person sees me as higher than them and in order to get my attention, they need to throw negative remarks at me.

Playing on women's insecurity is a pretty low way to go about things. IMO, it says a lot about the character of a person.

Originally Posted by Olena

Playing on women's insecurity is a pretty low way to go about things. IMO, it says a lot about the character of a person.

It also says a lot about the women if she falls for it.

Ugh, yes. So much experience with this considering that I am plus sized. It's always transparent though. Maybe when I was 18 I fell for it a few times. But ugh, yeah. It's just groady.

I think it's pathetic, if you need "tactics" then you are one sorry son of a bitch

Originally Posted by Arbite

It also says a lot about the women if she falls for it.

Women tend to be insecure about a lot of things(due to the media, unrealistic expectations of beauty, etc), this is pretty much fact, but to manipulate that, says a lot about the man, not about the woman.

I've heard stories of women staying with men because the men have managed to convince them that they 'will never find better because they're not good enough for others anyway' or something along those lines.

Women fall for it, yes. It's easy to find some reason not to feel good enough.

Yeah, I see this done all the time, it is quite mean-spirited, and I would say quite childlish, especially if the person somehow thinks to win them over and develop a serious relationship based on that behavior, which apparently they do, and such pettyness can only lead to ruin down the road if that was the device they used to get with each other.

I have not fallen for it and never will and I think guys who do that are pretty insecure themselves

I've had this happen recently actually. It's pretty pathetic.

A friend of mine swears by this tactic. It's not something I've ever done myself. I don't see the point. If I'd not consider even a casual relationship with a lass, then I won't chase her. Therefore, her self-esteem and insecurities are her issue. However, my friend (apparently) used to have self-esteem issues regarding his weight, and effectively feels like he needs to "catch up". I've already told him I will destroy every vestige of his 'game' if he was ever to try this on one of my friends, and he knows better than to try and get me involved in this crap.

I don't see the point to "negging" whatsoever, because you can tease in a totally light hearted manner, without honing in on perceived insecurities. I have no desire to play mind games, they're boring. Lastly, any woman I wind up with needs to be a team-mate. Therefore, I can't have her pondering over insecurities I planted or exploited. But meh, for those who require the concept of 'conquest' to feel good about themselves, well I guess that's their prerogative really *shrugs*.

Never done it. And feel free to shoot me in the head if I do.