Roommates

So I've seen some roommate threads here and there on PerC but they were usually individual stories/situations inquiring for advice.

I was interested in hearing people's general thoughts on roommates and wanted to open up this topic to everyone. I categorize this under "Sex and Relationships" because roommate-situations entail a unique mixture of relationship/friendship and also because some significant others live together.

What do you guys think about roommates? Advantages, disadvantages, horror stories, complications, etc... feel free to discuss any aspect about this

I'm finishing my junior year of college, and I've had good and bad experiences with roommates thus far. Being forced to have roommates is one of those life situations that makes me thank God for my extroversion. Even I go crazy sometimes from lack of alone time, so I can't imagine being an introvert and cooped up in a tiny room with some stranger.

Luckily, I can get along with almost anyone, am pretty respectful and considerate of others, & fairly laid-back, so living with other people tends to be fairly easy... except for the fact that I am the messiest person I know.

Freshman year: Got placed with a chick from Chicago. Became clear within 2 weeks that she was ultra-weird. Spent all her time in the room, not friendly at all and didn't make any friends until there was less than a month left in the school year. Would go back and forth between talking to me like we were best friends to sitting in silence and not speaking to me for days at a time. One time she left a note on my bed when I went home for the weekend demanding I clean my mess because it "depressed her to be in the room." Would Skype with her boyfriend while I was trying to sleep. I have no idea what her type was, but she was incredibly annoying and over-emotional while still being extremely cold.

Sophomore year: Lived with a girl in my sorority who I only kind of knew. She was an ESFJ, which seems like a recipe for disaster with an ENFP, but things worked out great. We got along really well and both hated passive-aggressive behavior, so she would just straight-up tell me if I needed to clean, which I appreciated.

Junior year (now): Sharing an apartment with three other girls-- an ESFJ, ISFJ, and some form of SP (she is an enigma). There's two bedrooms and I share with the SP, whom I get along with great. Dealing with the other two has been hell. Anything left out place becomes an instant passive-aggressive text message a day later, usually informing me they cleaned it up, so it's purely a guilt-trip. It feels like I am living with my mother... not a pleasant feeling.

Senior year I am living with three of my good friends-- an ENFJ, ESFJ, and ENTP(?). The ENTP is my best friend and we are both so messy and I am looking forward to just being able to sling mess everywhere in our room and not worry about it. : )

I acknowledge that I will eventually need to move out but right now that isn't financially feasible. Let's go on to the assumption that I am financially stable and able to move out and have roommates. I think I would have a harder time deciding whom I could live with.

I'm a person that needs their space and time alone. I may be an extrovert, but it doesn't mean I want you in my face 24/7. And with that comes my domain, my lair, my abode, I do not want people going into my room without permission. It's a huge pet peeve and I will not deal with that. I have nothing to hide but I think it's incredibly rude to go into someone else's room and go through their stuff. I would like a roommate that could respect and appreciate my privacy as I would respect and appreciate theirs.

I have no qualms about sex or gender identity, that's a non-issue for me. One thing I do have a problem with is ulterior motives. If I live with a person who I am not romantically interested in, I would expect them to do the same. I would not want to sign a lease on an apartment for a year and learn that this person has a major crush on me and moved in as a ploy to get closer to me. Literally and metaphorically. I would also avoid making the mistake of moving in with someone whom I have romantic feelings for but they don't share that same sentiment. That's a little too crazy for me.

All in all, I think it's a great opportunity to grow as a person and learn more about yourself. My current living condition is cramping my style, it would be nice if I had the money to move out though. So for now, I'm saving money and that's what I like most.

I'm sharing a dorm room with an ENFP. She's cool, but we don't hang out other than when we're both in the room. We're both fairly messy but I'm worse and I think she gets annoyed with that once and a while so I try to keep my side of the room clean, for the most part. I'm moving into an apartment in June because I don't have a room at my mom's anymore and would prefer to stay here during the summer anyway... I'm not sure what that situation will be like, but I'm looking forward to having my own room again.

My first roommate was my only good roommate. He had to leave because his sister stole his identity and he couldn't get student loans.
Every other roommate i have ever had as been a nightmare. I set a rule for myself no more roommates. I broke that rule for an ESFJ that i liked and it's gone to shit proving the rule.
The only time i will ever accept another roommate is for a romantic relationship.

My first roommate experience was at college and it wasn't good -- my roommate was very passive-aggressive and spread rumors about me. Then I switched roommates to the girl who was becoming my best friend and we had a great relationship and loved being roommates together. She was a lot more messy than me, and it kind of rubbed off on me:P I am to this day not nearly as tidy as I was before being roommates with her. We spent a lot of time together and sometimes got ready for bed together. We respected each other's space. It was a really great relationship and I miss being her roommate.

I've also shared close space with my boyfriend who will be moving into my tiny house soon. He is tidier than I am and does some of the housework. He has OCD which makes him unable to withstand certain sounds (like keyboard typing) so I usually have to type lengthy things in private (like right now, checking forums and writing on LiveJournal). Sometimes we suffocate each other, but usually we live together well. We often do independent activities side-by-side or one of us goes into the main bedroom while the other stays in the living room. There is also a small second bedroom where he will keep all his stuff and where he will go when he wants to be alone. I don't require much privacy myself, though.

In 2009 I moved out with my boyfriend(ESTP) and his best friend.(ENTP)
It was awful. Since the relationship was very fresh, I was very clingy and emotional. So was his best friend. It was like a fokken competition for my boyfriend's attention. They worked together and I stayed home scared of the big city of Vancouver. I never ended up getting a job, something that they would constantly bug me about, although they always broke their promises of taking me somewhere and getting an application. In the end I just couldn't handle it anymore. The thoughts of my boyfriend loving his best friend more and the constant strain on our relationship. My boyfriend and I ended up moving back with our parents and now we rent the basement of his parents place. I still feel guilty about never getting a job and not fulfilling my duties. I don't know if I will ever get over some of the emotions I experienced there. So much jealousy.

Mine drives me up the wall, even though I love him to death. I think that every person needs one place to call their own, a place to chill and focus and relax at the end of the day. Maybe that's an office room or side room, or a garden, pattio, etc. but you still need one place.

I'm home only to sleep, I don't cook, and have my own bathroom, so I'm easy to live with.

Just one rule: do NOT sneak into my room when I'm gone or go through my shit. I came home at 4:30 in the morning once, only to find my roommate and her boyfriend PASSED OUT ON MY FUCKING BED when I intended to collapse there right then and there. Not only that, I saw that she had been rummaging through my makeup bag. And my room REEKED of Chinese food.

As revenge, I went into HER room, ate the open bag of wasabi peas she had, and happily/angrily/vengefully munched and crunched away squirrelishly in her bed, leaving smashed wasabi peas all over and inside her bed and sheets. I only wish I was eating fluorescent orange buffalo wings instead.

However, when I woke up, I did find all her sex toys (they were piled by her mirror) and sprawled them all INSIDE the sheets, to give her the horrific illusion that I was using them (she and her penile companion were no doubt causing 'love stains' on my bed)... That said, she was not pleased the next night.

I have extra locks on my bedroom door now because of this.

Don't get sexually involved with your roommate unless you're planning to be in a relationship with them...at least that's my advice from my own experience...i wanted a relationship, he didn't, i started dating someone, all of a sudden he wanted me etc etc so much drama, i had to move out asap...