intimidation and relationships

Have you ever felt intimidated by a prospective partner/friend/any person, or an actual partner, why? how does this effect your relationships?

Is there a stigma attached to 'feeling intimidated'? (i.e. insecure) is feeling intimidated a natural thing, and not necessarily a reflection on a person's self worth?

Have you ever been told you are intimidating?

Have you observed intimidation in your experience in society?

We're talking here of certain characteristics, rather than someone who intentionallly intimidates in order to gain something, or to dominate.



I'm interested to glean some opinions on this for my own personal social research I guess...
I recently heard a conversation regarding it, and how it effected the people in their relationships. A few claimed they had never found a mate because other people are intimidated by their confidence and 'intelligence'. And they are constantly 'dumbing theirselves down'. Another mentioned that they knew a person, who only dated people who were 'lower' than them, in terms of status. Another mentioned they were too tall.

Have you ever felt intimidated by a prospective partner/friend/any person, or an actual partner, why? how does this effect your relationships?

yes, actually - a lot of times, and for a lot of reasons. i've been intimidated by how beautiful they are, or how confident they are, or how angry they are, haha.

Is there a stigma attached to 'feeling intimidated'? (i.e. insecure) is feeling intimidated a natural thing, and not necessarily a reflection on a person's self worth?

there is a big stigma attached to feeling intimidated, at least in my culture/society. i think it's natural. i'm not educated well enough on this to give a real say, but IF intimidation has to do with insecurity, then it has to do with fear, and fear is an emotional response. emotions are natural.

Have you ever been told you are intimidating?

yes... i don't know why though! i'm really nice ):

Have you observed intimidation in your experience in society?

eeeeeeverywhere. no matter where you go, you'll find it, somewhere.

Originally Posted by NatalieAnne

Have you ever felt intimidated by a prospective partner/friend/any person, or an actual partner, why? how does this effect your relationships?

Is there a stigma attached to 'feeling intimidated'? (i.e. insecure) is feeling intimidated a natural thing, and not necessarily a reflection on a person's self worth?

Have you ever been told you are intimidating?

Have you observed intimidation in your experience in society?

We're talking here of certain characteristics, rather than someone who intentionallly intimidates in order to gain something, or to dominate.



I'm interested to glean some opinions on this for my own personal social research I guess...
I recently heard a conversation regarding it, and how it effected the people in their relationships. A few claimed they had never found a mate because other people are intimidated by their confidence and 'intelligence'. And they are constantly 'dumbing theirselves down'. Another mentioned that they knew a person, who only dated people who were 'lower' than them, in terms of status. Another mentioned they were too tall.

I get intimidated and I intimidate others all the time. Intimidation often comes when someone has something that you want and either a) don't have it or b) think you don't have it.

Another reason for intimidation is mystery. If you don't know what is going on then that causes anxiety and if this is attached to a person then you will feel intimidation.

I think a cause of intimidation between types is...just that...their type. Say you have a INFP who encounters a ENTJ.....well that's intimidating for both. They are both most likely in touch with cognitive functions that the other is not as acquainted with. So unfamiliar cognitive functions can be a major cause of intimidation.

Relationships in general intimidate me......

Originally Posted by Shae

Relationships in general intimidate me......

:p They intimidate everyone. No worries :)

Omg all the time. Guys are constantly trying to act intimidating. I don't mean all of them of course, just the obnoxious premature pubesent ones who think they know shit. I'd say as much as half the guys my age.

I'll use 'he' as the pronoun in this post, but it can apply to women as well.

I'm not intimidated easily. I usually see people as human and have enough understanding to know that no matter how a person appears, he has weaknesses, regrets, worries, secrets and dreams like I do. If he is mysterious, I'm drawn to ask personal questions. And truthfully, if I can see that someone carries himself or treats people in such a way as to purposely intimidate, I will treat him as I do everyone else and not play the game at all. I see that as a sign of a sense of entitlement, which I do not respect, or a sign of insecurity and fear.

People who are intimidating because of their beauty or positon in the community or celebrity are usually warm and welcome normal friendly attention.

i think something's wrong with me, since the greatest degree of intimidation i feel is toward the person i'm in love with.

I seem intimidation in two forms

1) fear of another individual harming you. ie physical threat fight or flight
2) attacking your self-esteem. ie that person is so good looking!

Intimidating someone isn't something that you have to do on purpose, although with practice you can increase it effect in others. General intimidation increases in both cases by physical procimity. Also body language and movement can increase it as well. ie licking your lips, or cracking your knuckles.

Of the two forms of intimidation I would say the second is more useful in manipulation. Many people have already faced there fear when they were a child and lived. They hold anger and resentment for people bigger and stronger than them. This means anyone who intimdates them physically needs to worry about them stabbing them in the back.

Beautiful people however are desired rather than feared. They still get to daze your thinking pattern with intimidation but they don't have to worry about people being mad at them afterwards. Generally the oppisite is true, the person intimidated questions their self-worth. Beautiful people really do lead a charmed life, and it's why beauty is so prized in our current society. It's so useful in getting the things you want out of life with the least amount of work.

Coveny, that's a good point about beauty making someone question their self worth. I think it's interesting that even babies are drawn to beautiul faces, before self esteem has been compromised.

Also, if you perceive someone as having power over you, they will be more likely to manipulate you even if it isn't purposeful on thie part.A clenched jaw, a sudden alert posture, or extreme beauty can all intimidate.

Scylla, nothing is wrong with you, but maybe examine it a little more closely to figure out why you feel intimidated by the one who is closest to you.