The Sex Persona Test

Half-CockedRandom Brutal Sex Dreamer (RBSD)

Fiery. Hungry. Blatant. Sexual. Christ. You are Half-Cocked.
There’s a lot of wild lust inside you, banging around, that much is obvious. There’s also a lot of untamed emotion. When either escapes, look out. One minute you’re completely together, the next you’re a howling gale of hormones and opinions.
Outside relationships, your intense, mercurial personality makes you a charmer. You can be fiercely devoted, and it’s likely that many of your friends will be friends-for-life. Of course, your enemies are likewise certain and zealous, especially your exes and their therapists.
You will find the right person. In the short term, she’s someone virile who won’t sweat your imperfections. In the long term, she will be someone mature and caring who will grow to love them.




Sounds about right....

Another Random Gentle Love Dreamer (RGLD) here.

I got Sonnet

The Slow Dancer Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLD)

Steady, reliable, and cradling her tenderly. Take a deep breath, and let it out real easy...you are The Slow Dancer
Your focus is love, not sex, and for your age, you have average experience. But you’re a great, thoughtful guy, and your love life improves every year. There’s also a powerful elimination process working in your favor: most Playboy types get stuck raising unwanted kids before you even begin settling down. The women left over will be hot and yours. Your ideal woman is someone intimate, intelligent, and very supportive.
While you’re not exactly the life of the party, you do thrive in small groups of smart people. Your circle of friends is extra tight and it’s HIGHLY likely they’re just like you. You appreciate symmetry in relationships.

I got RBLM. Which is The Vapor Trail or The Sudden Departure.

The Vapor Trail
Random Brutal Love Master (RBLM)

Here today, gone today. You are The Vapor Trail. Are you in a relationship now?
What about now?
Vapor Trails can be highly charismatic people—unpredictable, confident, and magnetic. You’re experienced. You know how to handle yourself in a relationship, and many people appreciate that. Many people, all in a row.
You’ve had your share of blissful beginnings, to be sure. But things almost never turn out how you’d like, do they? The problem is you’re never happy with someone for an extended period of time.
Vapor Trails especially need a guy who will laugh at their jokes. They’re also the most likely male type to be haunted by serious regret.
FACT: A few of your exes, the ones you were best to, will always love you. Nice going.

The Sudden Departure
Random Brutal Love Master (RBLM)

Sweet. Dear. Loving. At Gate 18. Final call. You are The Sudden Departure.
You’ve been in a lot of serious relationships. More than a few have ended ugly. Uglily. Whatever. Our guess is that you’re a really fantastic girl who doesn’t really know what she wants, and you’ve broken a few hearts as a result. You fall for people easily, and you enjoy the feeling of falling in love, but once you’re there, either boredom or the old “grass is greener” syndrome sets in. The mind wanders, and with it goes the flesh. And then the toiletries.
We know you’re not the classic “love ’em and leave ’em” type, at least not in a purely sexual sense. You have too many serious bonding tendencies for that. But even though you’re theoreticallylooking to settle down, you don’t settle long on one person. “Serial monogamist” is probably something you hear a lot. “Emotionally loose” is another way to put it. To the poor girls eating your dust and sniffing your panties, it doesn’t really make much difference. Of course, it’s not really your fault that people get hurt. You have every right to move on when you choose.

I wonder why, though, the female description is much more flattering than the male one? Double standards much?

The Backrubber
Deliberate Gentle Sex Dreamer (DGSD)

Lusty but indirect. Kind, but also using friendship as a means to sex. Oh, that feels gooood. You are The Backrubber.

We call you “The Backrubber” because you straddle that fine line between coming on to someone and just treating her nicely. Backrubs are just one example; you’d meet for coffee, or talk about books/movies, or even argue a little bit, all the while mostly preferring to screw.

Your indirect approach is not some evil trickery, but rather a result of your open mind. You’d enjoy either love or sex, but the latter definitely doesn’t require the former. While you are responsible and ambitious, you absolutely DON’T have uptight views on relationships. So ultimately, you just enjoy a woman, and let things take their course. If she wants you, great. If not, that’s fine too.

Though you’re not thinking too much about Love at this point in your life, odds are, when the time comes, you’ll be very happy settling down. Your ideal mate is gentle and horny, just like you.

I looked at the female equivalent just for kicks and that one didn't look any better. I don't know how I feel about this test, some of it's right and other parts are just kind of wrong. Whatever.

The Sonnet Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLD)


Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed?
Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They’re conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that’s okay, because you’re very choosy with your affections anyway. You’d absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance.
Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You’re already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there’s no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so.
You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls.

Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLD)

Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed?
Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They’re conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that’s okay, because you’re very choosy with your affections anyway. You’d absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance.
Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You’re already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there’s no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so.
You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls.

The Poolboy Random Gentle Sex Dreamer (RGSD)

Friendly and eager. You are The Pool Boy.
A teen at heart, you anxiously move about your daily tasks, hoping, praying for a good, instant lay. You’re carefree, enthusiastic, and rarely discouraged. Love is cool, but it’s not for you right now. You know what is? Crotches.
You’re a fun person in both big and small groups, and your friends trust and love you. Inside you, meanwhile, your lust is only growing. Imagine your beating heart sprouting pubic hair. Exactly. Try shaving that.
If you’re not scoring enough—which you aren’t—you should adopt new strategies. Lower your standards. Be aggressive. Pool Boys are often submissive and hope (desperately) sex will find them. Realize that passiveness will not hook the horny guys you desire. A bolder approach and sheer repetition will.

The Intern Deliberate Gentle Sex Dreamer (DGSD)
Act 2, Scene 1
An attractive young woman, the INTERN, sits at her desk. ROSS and MACGRUDER, two sales associates, stand near the water cooler.
MACGRUDER: Whoa! Get a load of the new intern! I'd like to file my proposal in her drawers.
ROSS: Easy there, MacGruder, you'll get us fired. [aside] I agree.
Exeunt.

Capable. Trustworthy. Carnal. The Intern.
From our experience, Interns are nice girls who would really, really like us to come on to them. They, like you, must be looking for sex, preferably from someone good-looking and successful. So... what are you doing later? Oh, okay, cool. Well, maybe next time? Okay, okay, jeez.
The thing is, you’re a little bit quiet, so men think you’re waiting for them to start things. You do like sex a lot, they’re right about that, but few of them realize you’re a genuinely thoughtful person.
You’re choosy, not wanting to get mixed up with just anyone. Girls can get away with this kind of selectiveness for some reason. Most guys have to take whatever’s lying around, passed out.
You’re not necessarily looking for a steady relationship right now; that’s cool. Be careful to avoid people trying to tie you down to anything other than bedposts.