| || |
This is a discussion on Were you bullied in school? within the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers forums, part of the Keirsey Temperament Forums category; Originally Posted by Bear987 I wish I could have been a little more like you back in school. I was ...
Yeah, I was bullied from elementary school just up until the end of junior high. It was especially hard during the earlier years. I kept a journal of my thoughts, even back then, and reading it is so painful. I always found it difficult to make friends because I was so shy, and that made me a target for bullies. I was terribly sensitive and insecure, and the bullying I experienced (mostly name-calling and taunting) heightened these qualities.
I am so glad to be free of the public school system, and out into the real world where individualism is prized, not scorned.
Yeah I was, it was an incredibly traumatic experience and affects me til this day. I have worked hard to overcome my low confidence resulting from the bullying but the fact is that I was bullied from various people, those that were supposed to protect me and those I was supposed to make friends with, I had no friends and it has been a similar scenario, I have very few people who I feel truly close to, its made me feel so depressed, defective and untrusting. I have tried to reach out to people but I normally go about it in the wrong way or something goes wrong, a lot of it has not being able to sustain a friendship over a period of time and those I have stayed friends with over time have turned out to be toxic, controlling or downright bad influences. I have worked hard to break free from that which meant dumping certain people, staying away from percieved bad apples, a few times it has gotten pretty extreme where I darn't take the risk in case I get taken for a ride or they turn out to be not what I expected. I have learnt better though to listen to my intuition more which has helped. But in life, we all have to trust someone, we can't hide forever, humans by nature are sociable creatures, we survive on making contact with others, true, solitude has its benefits, it is said that we are our most creative during long periods alone but too long in the shadows and we struggle to distinguish reality.
i was bullied in elementry.. booth by students and siblings.. I honestly became a very solitude person.. Yes i had a few friends.. but going home again .. i was always alone.. maybe in this mindset i can go into detail.. but as an adult... i know it lasted until 5th grade.. i became a little if not a lot "rebellious" my parents were seperated sooo adult supervision.. wasnt always at hand.. Dont get me wrong i am a nice person.. still to this day.... I love ppl but im more attracted to darker things.. how i delt with it.. well.. just be patient and keep moving fwd.
I was picked on throughout my entire school experience. Up-front, flat-out bullying (sometimes expressed physically) took place for small, intense periods. That didn't make it any easier to get over, honestly.
I had to switch schools many times because of my parents' constant changes of circumstances (which made me the new kid a few times over), plus I was small and skinny, loved reading, was a decent student, aced the subjects other kids hated, and belonged to more than one minority. I didn't look, talk, behave or think like any of the other kids, and I didn't even know it.
So yeah, I was "that kid", the easiest target at hand. How could I not be bullied? Still, I don't think bullies need a "reason" as such to be bullies. Whatever triggers them, abuse is abuse, and it's always inacceptable.
How did I deal with it? I guess I just rode it out. It made me dig my heels in my posture, I think. I was weird, I was unique, and the world wasn't ready for someone as special as me, is what I told myself. Those kids had issues and needed someone to take it on with. The world was tough, and the sooner I learned that, the better. They hated me because they couldn't understand me, no big deal. Yeah, that's pretty much it.
I never cared what people said about me. Still don't, if I know I'm right in my views --or at least, if I'm not flat out wrong or hurting anybody. Why does anyone care if I wear mismatched socks sometimes, or sing under my breath when listening to music in my earplugs? What does it matter to people if I see things in a different way than they do? Why should religious, cultural, national or racial differences be an excuse to be pushed around in the halls, told hurtful things, have one's books torn down, and stuff like that? What's one thing got to do with the other?!?
Bullying shouldn't happen. Ever. Bullied kids aren't responsible for being bullied, any more than murder victims are guilty of their own murders.
So some of us are different. Big deal. Just move on, will you? Why hurt those who aren't like you? How does that make things better for anyone? Makes no sense to me.
I was bullied alot throughout school life. (Though rarely physically, I was a big kid)
It was terrible really. It made me so withdrawn and mistrusting of people. Only recently in the past 2 years or so, have I really tried to get out of my shell and win some confidence back, and its a really slow process.
Sometimes, I feel like damaged goods because of it.
I rarely spoke up about my abuse and exclusion, had I not had a great best friend that stood up for me and helped me seek out help, I probably would have ended up worse.
(That guy is really my rock you know.)
Eventually it stopped though. Though the feeling of exclusion remains.
Even at uni, I struggled to get rid of that feeling of being an outcast. I really did try, but I still haven't got there.
I still have my fear of people, my social anxiety (I think I had symptoms as far back as 8 or 9, but the child psychologists could never pin it down (they thought I may have been autistic of had Aspergers because my little brother is autistic, but that definately isn't the case, I don't really match up to the symptoms, but it definately was another thing that put self-doubt in my mind, and I bet it showed))
Yes, but only through verbal harassment. I was physically attackd but fought back, so it doesn't count since bullying is an imbalance of power.Were you bullied in school?
Verbally harassed all throughout my school lifeWhat grades were you bullied in or were you bullied throughout your whole school experience?
I just learned to understand bullies in a way. For example: bullies are insensitive and that they do it to everyone, even their close friends. Though the imbalance in power is evident, it is just caused by their natural behavior. Many times, they are not sensitive to the fact that they are threatening.How did you deal with it?
Other times they are doing it intentionally, but this is happening because of stress and internal problems they carry.
Just because the bully in question was being true to his or herself and acting out as he/she naturally would with other people his/her age.Why do you think you were bullied? Was there a reason or were they just bullying for the sake of bullying?
Thankfully I have never been bullied before. I believe I was pretty lucky with the schools I was on. I was incredibly outgoing as a child on elementary school, and I never hesitated to make a fool out of myself. I think that already discouraged others from trying to bully me, but I think I was just lucky as well, because I still hang out a lot with some of the friends I've met.
I was also lucky to have most of my friends from elementary school join me on the same middle school, so I suppose I already had a nice start before meeting others.
Whenever people tried to tease/bully me, though, I just pretended to be completely oblivious and I replied in a very polite and nice manner. Caught most of them off guard, haha.
I was bullied in school and church. Still don't know why. I didn't ever do anything mean or stupid or ridiculous, I usually kept to myself. But apparently daydreaming is enough to make kids hate you. That and sucking at sports. Children should not be forced to play team sports AT ALL.
Were you bullied in school?
What grades were you bullied in or were you bullied throughout your whole school experience?
6-8 (All of Middle School)
How did you deal with it?
I guess I didn't. I would come home crying everyday. I had a group of friends at the school, but I only saw them a couple of times a week, and because of that I grew apart from them, I spent most of my time between classes sitting alone in the library. I was mostly bullied verbally, but several times I was pursued by friend's of the bullies, had I stopped running I am sure I would have been hurt. Rumors were spread about me, and almost everyone was against me, because the bullies knew a lot of people. Once, in a class, everyone chanted the name of my cat who had recently passed away to make me cry, I had to run from class that day, that cat was my best friend through my school experience up to that point. In High School the bullying stopped immediately, probably because the bullies matured, but they never once said they were sorry, even when I had class with them. I still sat alone in the back of the library everyday until senior year. My senior year I finally came out of the shell I created and made friends at school for my first time in many years. I am now living the life I had only dreamed of in those days, in college :3.
Why do you think you were bullied? Was there a reason or were they just bullying for the sake of bullying?
I found out later the school I went to was considered ghetto, but there was really no reason for my bullying besides that. I made myself vulnerable, an easy target for other people. I was the quiet, never confrontational type who would rather run from a fight.