[Ramysa]

Well, theoretically the reasons for a person to fall in love with another person changes with age. I read in a book a while ago that the only pure love is the one that happens when we are very young, prolly teenagers, bcz our interests and expectations are not developed yet, therefore "love" is genuine .When we grow, we become more self aware of what we want in a SO ,so we tend to fall in love with the ppl that most fit the profile we have in our mind for that person. On the other hand there are ppl who believe that the only true love is the selfless one. The one where u love someone unconditionally . I personaly believe those ppl are self destructive. ( unless we talk abt the love of a mother for her child)

I gotta say, i'm not a teenager therefore I pretty much follow in the category mentioned above.

[Masterboy]

Well, theoretically the reasons for a person to fall in love with another person changes with age. I read in a book a while ago that the only pure love is the one that happens when we are very young, prolly teenagers, bcz our interests and expectations are not developed yet, therefore "love" is genuine .When we grow, we become more self aware of what we want in a SO ,so we tend to fall in love with the ppl that most fit the profile we have in our mind for that person. On the other hand there are ppl who believe that the only true love is the selfless one. The one where u love someone unconditionally . I personaly believe those ppl are self destructive. ( unless we talk abt the love of a mother for her child)

I gotta say, i'm not a teenager therefore I pretty much follow in the category mentioned above.

Each man or woman has an 'inner' man or woman. When a man sees a woman (and vice versa), there's a subconscious comparison of the outer man/woman they see to the inner one that they hold inside. If there is a match, then there is interest in knowing that person. There are those that teach that relationships are a mirror of ourselves. Whatever we are inside attracts the relationships that will help us grow or work out the issues so we can let love work on us. So it isn't about another person. If someone believes that they have to get something from a relationship, that person will have someone else in their life who reflects that (that wants to get something, or withholds something).

I can't remember who, but a man wrote a long time ago that love is not possible between man and woman. Because of desire. Children, not having sexually developed natures, express their attraction in ways that obviously don't result in sex and the rollercoaster of brain chemicals that are released with sex that frequently causes issues.

[AnalogDreamer]

The way I feel with my husband (ENTJ) is unlike any one else I've "loved" in the past. There is just the right level of comfort, common interests, and differences to make things interesting. He was a friend-of-a-friend, through a couple of different people, in college & shortly after. There was a way he would smile at me at bars or parties that told me he was interested: but not in a creepy/aggressive sort of way (because I hate that). I had a long term boyfriend at the time so I didn't pursue it.

By chance my now-husband was living across the country but visiting friends over break, when he got ahold of me at a perfect time (a newer boyfriend being a dick) & invited me to go to 80s Night. What can I say: I love 80s music. After several months of talking on the phone every night, I moved out to be with him.

[snail]

So there is this girl I'm in love with. If you asked me to tell about her, I'd give you a whole list of adjectives to describe how awesome she is.
The problem is that I'd describe some of my really good friends like that as well.

I've tried and tried to pinpoint what exactly is so different about this person that makes me feel like this and unfortunately, I don't seem to able to identify it. Have any of you been in this position ? Can you tell what is it, that special something, that makes you feel so strongly about a person ?

That's an interesting question. It isn't so much about specific qualities, although certainly someone with incompatible values wouldn't work. It is more about the ways we feel comfortable interacting, the awareness of being included completely, while with my friends, the inclusion feels only partial, and there are still a few parts of them that can get away with rejecting the less important parts of me. I think romantic love is a feeling of deep connection that happens on its own, given enough time and interaction, when I am certain that we are on the same team, understand each other, and are unified in our purpose. It is caused by so many subtle little things that it is very hard to explain, and yet it is none of those things alone. It is about how everything combines to make the person feel worth protecting, in the same ways I feel inclined to protect myself, because he is another of whatever I am, in a world where we are nearly extinct. It is a feeling similar to ownership, belonging to each other, not like property, but like a treasure that is very dear, in whose defense one would give up every other valuable thing if necessary. Beyond that, there is a feeling that moves near the lungs, sometimes both inward and outward all at once, which is impossible to define clearly. It reaches like invisible tentacles or vines winding parts of us into each other, and when we have been bound at the breath, with our heartbeats moving together, the tendrils stretch across every possible distance so that wherever we go, we can still feel the other person's influence flowing through us, even if the person rejects us eventually because the connection is too painful.

That feeling comes after there is a sufficient level of trust and acceptance, after our communication has created a very extreme level of intimacy through the intentional expression of mutual vulnerability, but there is so much more to it. I know the answer to your question, but I don't know how to explain it.

[Peter8]

I think you know when you are in love, when your body is doing stuff to you (hormones) that you dont get when you are with close friends or family members. We still are biological beings / machines. It is your body making these chemicals, that are sent to your brain that makes you like/love a person.

[Lachesis]

Reciprocated feelings and trust(worthiness).

[SuperNova85]

A mirror image of my ideal self.....oh yeah, and a gorgeous smile:-)

[Mango Kiwi]

butterflies in your stomach, their pain is your pain, unexplainable/natural phenomenon that I will never really understand

[Uncouth Angel]

part of it, for me, is knowing they like me back.

This. Except they tend to lose interest . . .

[Ace Face]

I fall in love with a person's heart and soul. That's what creates magic :3