[Utmostrose]

Do any other enfjs on here tend to get disappointed a lot? I find myself constantly being disappointed by people, things, situations. Just wondered if this was particular to enfjs and/or other Nfs. I hate it because it makes me go through some bitter periods sometimes. Could it be expecting so much that disappointment is the only outcome?

[IluvHSJ]

I get disappointed when I hear people at my hospital talk about patients behind their backs, when they treat them like a nuisance, when they say that those patients are better off dead. I get disappointed when they say they should start the morphine drips right away, so that the patient can go faster. I get disappointed that people can be so narrow in their thoughts and so judgmental about others so easily, making up lies and speaking it as truth.

I think it is the "idealism" inside the NF, as well as some other types, which makes it easy to get disappointed, since we are expecting the best of this world (one that is just and kind) and the best of people (honest, patient, and understanding, as well as compassionate), then when we see situations that are not like this, we can get deeply discouraged.

I think we should still be idealistic no matter what, yet also balance it with the view that the world and people aren't perfect. When we realize that it is natural for there to be "flaws" and "setbacks", then maybe it makes it easier for us to cope, as well as hope for things to get better one day.

[CoakJoints]

Do any other enfjs on here tend to get disappointed a lot? I find myself constantly being disappointed by people, things, situations. Just wondered if this was particular to enfjs and/or other Nfs. I hate it because it makes me go through some bitter periods sometimes. Could it be expecting so much that disappointment is the only outcome?

Very much so, I have developed a way of coping that is almost Buddhist in its philosophy. I have cultivated an understanding that life is unfair and full of disappointment and suffering. Within that framework I really don't place expectations on things outside of myself, doing that first requires insight into the things you can and cannot control I don't let disappointments resulting from things I can't control get me down. That being said I still am, very very ambitious and focused, but my focus is on putting in the work, engaging in the process necessary to achieve want I want to achieve without focusing on the outcome. Outcomes I can't control, input I can. Ya feel me?

[triplespresso]

yes. I can easily slip into being seriously disillusioned when someone acts cruel, selfish, or purposefully unkind. To get out of that feeling I have to put myself around others who do care and do try to be the best person they can be. Then, even if they falter, because we all do, I can see that at least they are trying. Or I try to look at areas in which those people that are disappointing me are showing kindness or love in other ways; such as how they treat their close friends or loved ones. In general I try to be cognizant of the other "types" and realize that not everyone has the same motivation that I do. That being said: I avoid the news like the plague. The disgusting stuff they report on is enough for any enfj to give up!

[TheRamona369]

Do any other enfjs on here tend to get disappointed a lot? I find myself constantly being disappointed by people, things, situations. Just wondered if this was particular to enfjs and/or other Nfs. I hate it because it makes me go through some bitter periods sometimes. Could it be expecting so much that disappointment is the only outcome?

I don't think its just ENFJs. Maybe it has to do with being an NF in general. You know cuz of the dreamer thing. Well anyone can be disappointed so yah.
But to answer your question. I do feel it has to do with having high expectation of others or of a situation, or just having expectation in general lol. Some know how to tune this out and not having expectations of others and just expecting the worst, but I can imagine the negative side to this. I know I didnt really solve anything but thats my two bit on it.

[uniquegirl]

As an INFJ, I find myself getting disappointed in people all the time. I try to remind myself people aren't perfect, but I can't help but get disappointed and even want to shut certain people out. At the same time, I'm disappointed in myself when I'm not perfect. As for situations, I can't say disappointed but just bored after a while.

[Risen from Ashes]

I'm always disappointed. I guess the best bet is to be realistic and not to have expectations about anything. The only person you can control is yourself, and to be honest, some of us aren't even good at that!