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This is a discussion on Can't stay away from INFJ (...that rhymes!) within the Myers Briggs Forum forums, part of the Personality Type Forums category; Originally Posted by T.N.D. It is one thing to get attracted. Another thing to make it work. If you have ...
@T.N.D. - Yes. That's it. ^^ Actually, the difference between, say, an INFP and an ENFP is startling. I might relate more to a Sensor type, such as an ESFP more than an INFP. What you've really got to look at is the functions that make up each type and then compare. Also, you've got to watch out because there's so many stereotypes when it comes to the functions. It's best to take a look at cognitive functions to best understand the personality types.
Those are basically David Kiersey's temperament groupings of the MBTI types (long story short Kiersey took the 16 MBTI types and then tried to figure out which 'temperaments' or, in his case, what social roles, artisan, guardian, rational, idealist, each of the 16 types would fall into. His actual groupings are SJ, SP, NF, NT).
But I wouldn't read much into those groupings because Jungian psychology (and Myers Briggs, which is its offshoot, that came up with the four letter type code) is really built around the idea of the cognitive functions. That every type has four functions deployed in one of two ways, introverted (self-referencing) or extraverted (objective, or related to things outside of the self). So everyone has two introverted functions and two extraverted functions (functions are just the mechanisms we use for directing our thoughts to advance what our ego wants to do). So type is defined by which order of the functions you have, and really by which of those functions dominates. This is actually something the MBTI gets wrong with their J/P because J/P gets assigned to Extraverted Functions only (but what if the person leads with an introverted function, like all introverts? Then the J/P will be applied to the wrong function).
So for instance ISTPs are called P's, but their dominant function is Introverted Thinking. That's what makes them an introvert and a Thinking type. Thinking, as we know is a judging function, so then why the P? Because by only pointing J/P at extraversion, the P gets assigned erroneously to ISTP's auxiliary Sensation function. Yet ISTPs are not Sensation types. Extraverted Sensation is an auxiliary function (a helper, or first mate, but Thinking is the captain). So in Introverts J/P is actually backwards (the Russian MBTI equivalent, Socionics figured this out and in the Socionics nomenclature the J/Ps are switched for introverts and downplayed and lowercased because J/P is really more about behavior than it is about how you filter information, so the INFP becomes an INFj in Socionics).
So when we look at it from a cognitive function perspective it becomes a little silly to divide the types up the way Kiersey (and even the MBTI have) because they don't really make functional sense. Kiersey's SJ temperament (though honest in its assertions of people who are traditional minded and like to play things close to what they know) betrays the fact that the only common thing to SJs (ESFJ, ESTJ, ISFJ, ESTJ) is Introverted Sensation and some form of Extraverted Judgment (T or F) as either the dominant or auxiliary function. This is hardly nailing it to the wall and a loose association at best for all that he is claiming about that temperament grouping.
NFs and NTs get even more nebulous. NF has Intuition and Feeling as either dominant or auxiliary (no matter the fact that a person who leads with Feeling will be very different than one who leads with Intuition) but it could be either Introverted Intuition or Extraverted Intuition, Introverted Feeling or Extraverted Feeling. All of these will make substantial differences in the overall disposition of the person. ENFJ and ENFP have no functions in common nor do INFJ and INFP. INFJ is actually closer to ENTP (in both leading with Intuition and having Ti and Fe preferences) than it is to INFP. With NTs its just as crazy. Te-types and Ti-types couldn't be any more different from each other, despite both leading with Thinking.
So it goes to say that these little groupings are rather silly and as Jung intended the types need to be looked at on a more individual basis. This is why I say an ESTP and INFJ are not that far apart. They're literally inverse of one another, so one some level they will probably get each other, even if the other is doing everything completely opposite they might arrive at the same place. But INFJ and ISTJ have nothing in common, and in fact, have the ingredients to really get on each other's nerves because the ISTJ leads with Introverted Sensation, which is an anathema to the INFJ.
Jung's basic types as he documented in "Psychological Types," Psychological Types - Wikisocion are (with their Myers Briggs equivalents in parenthesis)
The Extraverted Thinking type (ENTJ, ESTJ)
The Extraverted Feeling type (ENFJ, ESFJ)
The Extraverted Sensation type (ESTP, ESFP)
The Extraverted Intuitive (ENFP, ENTP)
The Introverted Thinking type (ISTP, INTP)
The Introverted Feeling type (INFP, ISFP)
The Introverted Sensation type (ISFJ, ISTJ)
The Introverted Intuitive (INFJ, INTJ)
I'm so curious, what do you think that Freud was? I've heard ENTJ often, but I'm not sure what introverted type he might've been (INTJ???)?(both Jung and Freud were gregarious introverts).
It is interesting that many of these same criticisms can be leveled against Myers who was also an INFP.Jung has never said anything about Freud's type as a human being; he has only said in his many books that Freud's system represents extraverted Thinking, so what I add now is my own personal conviction, namely that Freud was an Introverted Feeling type and that therefore his writings bear the characteristics of his Inferior extraverted Thinking. There you typically have the fact that the basic ideas are few and that they are raced through, and that the writer has beaten through an enormous amount of outer material and is completely oriented toward the outer object, so that a rather poor biological outer setup of facts is connected with the basis of his thoughts. If you read biographical notes about Freud, you see that as a person had a most differentiated way of treating people. He was an excellent analyst and had a very differentiated way of treating his patients. He had also a kind of hidden gentlemanliness which had a positive influence upon his patients and in general upon his surroundings. One must really, in his case, make a distinction between his theory and his personality as a human being. I think, from what one hears about him, that he belonged to the Introverted Feeling type.
Interesting. I have a really hard time believing he was a dominant feeling type, based on all of the stereotypes associated with him, but who knows.
Kiersey is where most people start, but cognitive functions is the next place to go and the sooner the better, once you do you won't look back. When it comes to functions J/P makes the largest difference, it flips everything around between introverted and extroverted ie: xNFJ Ni+Fe xNFP Fi+Ne. Check out the cognitive functions forum.
INTP's are Ti/Ne, see if you relate. Understanding the 8 Jungian Cognitive Processes (8 Functions)
We don't have any issue over the fact that I'm extroverted and he's introverted. He's great when he's out with people and isn't shy at all-- he just needs to have his alone time to recoup. And I'm happy to give space. I think it's more about where we get our energy from. People are like batteries to me and my energy and enthusiasm spikes when I'm around others.. whereas I'm way calmer and a little more emotionally drained being alone for a long time. I enjoy my "me time" as much as the next person, but I get my boost from being with others. As for him, his alone time is was inspires him and brings him back to his connection with the world-- when he's with people, he enjoys it, but it takes energy from him rather than infusing him with it. By no means is this a problem with us. And @LiquidLight yes I think he does have me a little TOO figured out haha.