[Meowmixmuffin]

I do, in most cases.
I'm an INFP, and typically we're supposed to get along well with ENFJ's and ESFJ's.
ESFJ's and I usually end up not getting along, because it seems like when I point out my opinion or viewpoint on a subject, they feel it's their duty to point out why I'm wrong and they're right. ESFJ's that I've met also seem to have no grasp on the concept of "personal bubble", and don't understand why I don't want to tell them all of my woes and fears. I don't know what it is, but I just clash with ESFJ's, with the exception of a few very, very close friends.
ENFJ's are all fine and well, except for the fact that I'm totally uncomfortable with their insecurities, to the point that it hinders my relationships with them. I'm all for backing anyone up in their goals, applauding them for their achievements, and cheering them up when they're down. I'll sit and listen and advise to the best of my abilities. But I find it so draining to be constantly on my toes, worried that I'm going to offend them, or having to constantly throw compliments in their direction. I guess, I find them needy. Bad experience, or just conflicting personalities? I don't know. Because of this, one ENFJ in particular thinks I'm a cold bitch. I'm inclined to think that this just may have been an unhealthy ENFJ though, because everything else about the relationship was wonderful and ideal, fireworks and warm fuzzies, the whole nine yards.
I find it way easier to get along with TP's. The two people who I adore and admire most in the world, an ENTP and an ISTP. It's so much easier to deal with someone who's logical and rational, especially in situations where I may not be. J's and I don't get along, because I get frustrated with their "black-and-white" thinking.

tl;dr, the people MBTI tells me I should get along with, are usually the people I get along with the least.

Does anyone else feel like this whole compatibility thing is all wrong? Certainly there are exceptions, but a handful of INFP's I've spoken with seem to have similar dispositions.

[NeedsNewNameNow]

Some sources say my ideal match is ENTJ. Not sure, but I have my doubts how well that'd work. Others say it's ESFJ, which again I doubt.

It seems like I'm drawn most to other NPs or ENFJs but they never show up as high compatibility

[LiquidLight]

I dunno if INFP with ESFJ and ENFJ is the greatest pairing. The Fe/Fi difference is killer. (I could see how someone might be attracted to this, but in reality this is probably not a good deal, more like a siren's song). INFP might do a little better with ENFJ just because they're both NFs and kinda see the things similarly but even here there's no common functions. Everything you describe sounds like conflicts of Fi in INFP vs. Fe in ExFJs.

You might have a similar problem with ENTPs in the long run (because of their inconsistent and childish Fe), but its been said by David Kiersey that NTs and NFs aren't too bad for each other, at least in terms of recognizing potential. Obviously INFP and ESTJ are mirror images and do well in the long run (but are complete opposites who likely despise each other at first).

[ElectricSparkle]

I'm pretty sure INTPs and ENFJs are theoretically compatible under one of the systems...


I used to be pretty dismissive of this but now I think there could be something to the theory of being attracted to those with the same perception function of the opposite orientation. Basically that ENPs and INJs, ESPs and ISJs, and such... tend to find each other mysteriously hawt. But then the person who you eventually find to be a life partner is representational of your inferior function... however this person could really be of any type. So the deemed compatability thing sort of falls apart there, which explains why people are all sorts of type combinations can and do come together happily.

[LiquidLight]

But then the person who you eventually find to be a life partner is representational of your inferior function... however this person could really be of any type. So the deemed compatability thing sort of falls apart there, which explains why people are all sorts of type combinations can and do come together happily.

Yea because I think it depends on how much you've repressed and how much you've come to terms with your inferior. Most older people may not need or find the most extreme version of their alter-type (INFP/ESTJ for example) as appealing/repulsive because their inferior is better dealt with. I can say that as a younger man and teenager type 7 ESPs were super sexy to me (kinda femme fatales) but as I've gotten older and embraced more of my own Se I feel I am not as attracted to something that extreme. I do go crazy for Ne-types though (even people with strong Ne like ESFJs sometimes).

[FreeSpirit]

Considering that I still actually believe I'm a XNTJ, and
that according to socionics that pairs me (optimally-
as in 'relations of duality') with ISFJ or ESFJ- no, I don't
think it's wrong.

I especially admire the ISFJ ethos, but I have no
doubt that the ESFJ ethos would work for me, as well.
Esp. since I just realized recently that I'm extroverted
out of necessity most of the time, and whenever I am
around truly outgoing personalities I feel relieved because
I don't have to carry the conversation/action anymore.
In fact, I find myself speaking very little in these situations
and REALLY ENJOY IT.

The fact that I really admire the ISFJ ethos (if I happen to
actually be more introverted- INTJ) actually makes perfect
sense in socionics pairings, as well- because INTJ and ISFJ
are supposed to be a 'super- ego' pairing- one of mutual
admiration.

This is where I got this crap:
Relations between Psychological ("personality") Types

[myexplodingcat]

I do, in most cases.
I'm an INFP, and typically we're supposed to get along well with ENFJ's and ESFJ's.
ESFJ's and I usually end up not getting along, because it seems like when I point out my opinion or viewpoint on a subject, they feel it's their duty to point out why I'm wrong and they're right. ESFJ's that I've met also seem to have no grasp on the concept of "personal bubble", and don't understand why I don't want to tell them all of my woes and fears. I don't know what it is, but I just clash with ESFJ's, with the exception of a few very, very close friends.
ENFJ's are all fine and well, except for the fact that I'm totally uncomfortable with their insecurities, to the point that it hinders my relationships with them. I'm all for backing anyone up in their goals, applauding them for their achievements, and cheering them up when they're down. I'll sit and listen and advise to the best of my abilities. But I find it so draining to be constantly on my toes, worried that I'm going to offend them, or having to constantly throw compliments in their direction. I guess, I find them needy. Bad experience, or just conflicting personalities? I don't know. Because of this, one ENFJ in particular thinks I'm a cold bitch. I'm inclined to think that this just may have been an unhealthy ENFJ though, because everything else about the relationship was wonderful and ideal, fireworks and warm fuzzies, the whole nine yards.
I find it way easier to get along with TP's. The two people who I adore and admire most in the world, an ENTP and an ISTP. It's so much easier to deal with someone who's logical and rational, especially in situations where I may not be. J's and I don't get along, because I get frustrated with their "black-and-white" thinking.

tl;dr, the people MBTI tells me I should get along with, are usually the people I get along with the least.

Does anyone else feel like this whole compatibility thing is all wrong? Certainly there are exceptions, but a handful of INFP's I've spoken with seem to have similar dispositions.

There's one website out there that says INTPs are compatible with ISTJs and ENTJs. A lot of the time, I find these types to be overly serious (and this come from an INTP!) and rather controlling. Not all of them, but many.

ISTJs compartmentalize worse than INTPs! If you don't know them outside work or school, you're missing a lot. Usually, they're avid collectors or have a specific hobby that they do all the time. And if anything is out of the norm... they kind of go weird. Like, they can't see their coworkers at Walmart or anything, because that's not where they belong. I'm not sure how this works well with INTPs and their crazy holistic spiraling, the way they derail threads and conversations until suddenly we're all talking about sloths.

ENTJs are all very well and good... but let's say one goes on a vacation with an INTP. The INTP's ideal plan for the day is to sleep in, then find a good coffee shop, then go to the most gigantic museum they can find, and then raid the local bookstore until the employees kick him/her out, or s/he falls asleep on the floor with his/her nose is C++ For Dummies. The ENTJ's plan will involve waking up at the crack of dawn, finding some "real breakfast," and then methodically plotting out a course through a museum which isn't busy. (They're still NTs, mind you.) They will then Find Something to Do. They can't just wander aimlessly--oh, look, let's take that road! Where does it lead? I don't know! Let's go!--they want things to be planned, and they want to do them all.

I think I'd be better off with an ENTP, although we'd spend all day arguing over whether the points made on the museum signs are viable claims and we'd blow all our money in the bookstore. But the important thing is that for both of us, the bad part about "spend all day arguing about the claims" isn't the "arguing," it's the "spend all day." Because we'd both forget to eat. Oops.

Or maybe an INFJ. Quiet, thoughtful, a little more organized and a little more social. Friendly, patient, calm, intelligent. You know?

[Zeitgeist]

I do, in most cases.
I'm an INFP, and typically we're supposed to get along well with ENFJ's and ESFJ's.
ESFJ's and I usually end up not getting along, because it seems like when I point out my opinion or viewpoint on a subject, they feel it's their duty to point out why I'm wrong and they're right. ESFJ's that I've met also seem to have no grasp on the concept of "personal bubble", and don't understand why I don't want to tell them all of my woes and fears. I don't know what it is, but I just clash with ESFJ's, with the exception of a few very, very close friends.
ENFJ's are all fine and well, except for the fact that I'm totally uncomfortable with their insecurities, to the point that it hinders my relationships with them. I'm all for backing anyone up in their goals, applauding them for their achievements, and cheering them up when they're down. I'll sit and listen and advise to the best of my abilities. But I find it so draining to be constantly on my toes, worried that I'm going to offend them, or having to constantly throw compliments in their direction. I guess, I find them needy. Bad experience, or just conflicting personalities? I don't know. Because of this, one ENFJ in particular thinks I'm a cold bitch. I'm inclined to think that this just may have been an unhealthy ENFJ though, because everything else about the relationship was wonderful and ideal, fireworks and warm fuzzies, the whole nine yards.
I find it way easier to get along with TP's. The two people who I adore and admire most in the world, an ENTP and an ISTP. It's so much easier to deal with someone who's logical and rational, especially in situations where I may not be. J's and I don't get along, because I get frustrated with their "black-and-white" thinking.

tl;dr, the people MBTI tells me I should get along with, are usually the people I get along with the least.

Does anyone else feel like this whole compatibility thing is all wrong? Certainly there are exceptions, but a handful of INFP's I've spoken with seem to have similar dispositions.

I f*cking couldn't agree more. I like ENFJs...as friends but as lovers I'm just not attracted to them. They are too emotional, I think (I know a sensitive INFP is saying this, right?) They also Extravert all that feeling which comes off as contrived, unstable, and gritty to me and I'm forced to reciprocate; dually annoying. My feelings are confined to my head.

ESFJs get on my nerves because they have to throw a party to celebrate everything. Having a birthday? PARTY! Getting engaged? PARTY! Your son got an A on his litmus test? PARTY! Got a promotion? PARTY! Your two year old just took his first shit on the big potty? PARTY!

Seriously, why do you need to host a dinner/cocktail party for everything? I find that seriously annoying and pretty much everything ESFJs represent annoying. I could not abide by the superficiality of that lifestyle.

The types that I DO find myself drawn to are INFJs for sure (wise, gentle, intelligent, and sometimes direct. More logical and intuitive than us: Way awesome!) I feel like INFJs say what needs to be said and they rarely, if ever, try to blow smoke up my ass. INTJs are also super attractive, they come off as mysterious, robotic and adorable to me and I always fall incredibly HARD head-over-heels in love them. I think the vast majority of my writing and artwork was INTJ-inspired.

Other notables are INTPs although in stark contrast to our iNtuitive dom friends, they are extremely apathetic as a type but cool as shit to be around and if one falls in love with you, they do become more sincere. ISTPs are a complete mystery to me but they are attractive. I can't relate to them on any level except that they prefer to be alone over being social, but they're f*cking clowns in social situations. ENTPs can be attractive but the reality is that they make good friends but INFPs/ENTPs don't tend to develop deep feelings for each other. I love other INFPs and I want to hug each and every one of you fellow oddballs. An INFP male is such a sad, engimatic creature but I've noticed that they're INFPness seems to manifest itself in an angrier way than females. I have no idea what a relationship with one would be like but I'm open to the idea.

I want either an INTJ or an INFJ. Either one would make me fall madly in love. I might not even be that picky about gender, I love these types so much. Really, sometimes I wonder if I'm truly heterosexual because I might play on the other team for certain INTJ females. I guess that makes sense because INTJ is such a "masculine" personality type, right? Please tell me I'm not alone on this one.

[Owfin]

Why do people make ESFJs and ENFJs out to be so different when they don't do so for ISTJs and INTJs? ISTJs and INTJs really are totally different but somehow there is less of a divide than between types that look for truth in the exact same way.

[JungyesMBTIno]

Yea because I think it depends on how much you've repressed and how much you've come to terms with your inferior. Most older people may not need or find the most extreme version of their alter-type (INFP/ESTJ for example) as appealing/repulsive because their inferior is better dealt with. I can say that as a younger man and teenager type 7 ESPs were super sexy to me (kinda femme fatales) but as I've gotten older and embraced more of my own Se I feel I am not as attracted to something that extreme. I do go crazy for Ne-types though (even people with strong Ne like ESFJs sometimes).

Oh wow, as an Ni dom, I don't think I've ever found an Se dom sexy, lol. I'm bigger about Ne types as well.