I'm pretty sure most of you have seen this one before, but I searched the forum and couldn't find anything like it, so i'll post it anyway! :P
Here's a parody on what our prayers may be like:
Lord, help me to relax my focus on insignificant details, even though any of them may cause significant problems later. But let us begin this tomorrow at 8:31:04 am.
God, please help me to consider other people's feelings, even if most of them ARE excessively hypersensitive.
God help me to accept responsibility for my own actions, even though problems are usually NOT my fault.
God, please help me to not try to RUN everything.
But, if You need some help, just ask.
Lord, please help me to be more laid back and help me to do that EXACTLY correctly.
Lord, help me to stand up for my rights (if you don't mind my asking).
God help me to take things more seriously, especially jokes, parties, conversation and dancing.
God give me the patience I need to deal with things more effectively, and I mean right NOW!
Lord. Please help me not to be so perfectionistic!
(Did I spell that correctly?)
God, help me to finish everything I sta..
God, please help me to keep my mind on one...
Look a butterfly!
thing at a time.
God help me to do only what I can, trusting you for all the rest. But would you mind putting that in writing?
Lord keep me open to others' ideas, WRONG though they may be.
Lord, please help me to be a little less independent but in my own way, of course.
Lord, please help me follow our established procedures today. On second thought, I'll settle for a couple of minutes.
Lord, help me slow downandnotrushthroughwhatIdo.