MBTI Type and Long-term Romantic Relationships (2+ yrs)

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I am ISFP and was with an ESFJ for 6 years. This is supposed to be one of the "perfect" matches in at least one theory, and I'm sure it would be if one of the partners didn't have an untreated mental illness that led to outbursts of rage.

His good side and periods of mental health were pretty much perfect for me.

What is the logic behind your groupings, BTW?

Originally Posted by fourtines

What is the logic behind your groupings, BTW?

The logic is particular arrangements of cognitive functions in each pair. All the types listed under one group have the same relationship between their cognitive functions. Types listed under relationship C all have same dominant and inferior functions but different auxiliary and tertiary (like INFJ-INTJ both are Ni-dominant and Se-inferior but have different supporting functions). Types listed under relationship K have same auxiliary and tertiary but different dominant and inferior functions (like INFJ-ISFJ both are Fe-auxiliary and Ti tertiary but differ in their dominant function). And so on.

These relations follow socionics inter-type relations. Relationship chart.
A is identical, B is quasi-identical, C is kindred, D is extinguishment, E is semi-duality, F is duality, G is conflicting, H is mirage, I is activity, J is mirror, K is business, L is super-ego, M is benefit, N is supervision. Your relationship with ESFJ would fall under extinguishment.

Type J for the win :]

Originally Posted by pinkrasputin

I'm so trying to be okay with how this poll is completely discounting military couples who sometimes have to go years living apart while a service member is deployed. It is a regular way of their marriage to be LDR and they have incredible staying power. They are also some of the most real relationships I've ever seen. War has a way of making couples lock together, work together, own up, and get real together quicker, even if for much of the time their only correspondence is online or by phone. They manage to focus on what is really important. Just think of what is often at stake.

Can you be sure that all who are LDR or talk online are only putting their best foot forward? A lot of people who are LDR have had to deal with the real issues in life sooner.

And to the OP, yes you can conduct the poll in any way you choose. But I think your results are going to be a bit skewed because you may have not considered all the factors. Are you really sure you don't want these results? There may be some incredible MBTI pair ups that have crazy staying power, in spite of the troubles they endure and because of the troubles they endure. It's not just anyone that can live apart, have their own life, and put trust in faith in their mate who may live many, many miles away. I think these people should be considered if you really want to know which relationships have endurance.

I definitely agree with you. To me, it's one thing to not take into account relationships that are long-distance to where they have never met in person or never spent lengths of time together to truly get to know each other & connect psychologically on a deep level, but it isn't really fair to those who have already spent that time together & connected in such a way but have been separated AFTERWARDS. That's my input anyway. :-)

Type N: ISFP and ESTP both type 7

opposite artisans, complimenting each other. always on adventures and we never get bored!

Originally Posted by Destiny Lund

I definitely agree with you. To me, it's one thing to not take into account relationships that are long-distance to where they have never met in person or never spent lengths of time together to truly get to know each other & connect psychologically on a deep level, but it isn't really fair to those who have already spent that time together & connected in such a way but have been separated AFTERWARDS. That's my input anyway. :-)

If you have spent 2 years together, then parted afterwards, then that's perfectly fine. All I have asked is that you've spend a total of 2 years living and communicating at close distance.

On another note, this is just a poll on the internet - it's not a bill to take away your civil rights :) It's surprising how much sentiment there is concerning unfairness. I hope you guys are just as involved in your local community politics and social service where this kind of discussion would really matter.

My 1st boyfriend is an ISFJ... We were together for 3 years. My longest relationship. I broke it off because i was bored to be honest and wanted to try new things. But we got along super well, almost too well. We fought hardly at all. Even though it was my 1st relationship. We never got on each others bad side.

I wonder if these poll results would be different if the question was "happiest" instead of "longest".