So in the navy there is this saying that gets tossed around like hotcakes, "perception is reality." Basically what it means is that if there is a gut feeling you feel a certain way toward someone there is usually some element of truth to it.
Well basically the number one personality I hear saying these words are ESTJ's. ESTJ's are all about the navy. The navy is all about ESTJ's. So what tends to happen is that ESTJ's are often times all around me.
Now, according to socionics, I have a "contrary" relationship with them which means they always think I'm trying to go against their wishes and rebel. This couldn't be any more true. Its probably the biggest problem in my life (next to near constant identity crisis).
So in the military, all these people tell me I have an attitude problem. Its usually ESTJ's. Sometimes other personalities have their own issues with me which I feel are warranted. But with ESTJ's I can never convince them that I'm not what they percieve. This is usually how it goes:
ESTJ: You have an attitude problem.
Me: No I don't.
ESTJ: Yes you do.
Me: Um, yes sir. (moves on with life)
ESTJ: (goes on and tells all his friends I have an attitude problem, and then suddenly everyone hates me and thinks I'm incompetant.)
This is obsurd. I've dealt with this problem for the last 5 years of my life. I don't know what to do or how to solve it. This is ruining my life.
Now, over the last 5 years I've adapted to it. However when I act the way they want me to, I just act like an ESTJ. And in doing so I get completely exhausted and as someone pointed out to me I might have prolonged adaptive stress syndrome, which basically means you get fatigued and depressed from living a lie.
In the military, challenging ESTJ's is tough because its all about politics and everything you say apparently puts their reputation on the line. They become very careful around me and make sure they act to perfection.
So as mentioned before, this is ruining my life and I need to find a way to deal with ESTJ's who do this shit to me. Any ideas? I need some canned lines that will be effective. I'm not sure what to do.