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This is a discussion on The failures of ISTJs - how do you feel when you fail? within the ISTJ Forum - The Duty Fulfillers forums, part of the SJ's Temperament Forum- The Overseers category; Originally Posted by Sela In a nutshell: You failed = Fix the problem You Failed = Fix The Problem YOU ...
What Sela and Veisalgia said, basically. I will normally lay in bed and think of each mistake I made throughout my past to search for solutions to past problems in order to perform better in the future given the different situations. When the solutions aren't apparent I will go into a melancholy and begin to understand what skills I don't have to narrow my options for the future and not run into similar problems. In general, this does not happen though. I'll normally create a stronger system with better tools to support me and my will to succeed is multiplied with a level of seriousness surpassing everyone I've seen. An example of these tools in action is, recently I've grown tired of my own slacking recently in school so I record my lectures and play them to myself in the car in an attempt to improve my memory of items I should learn.
You will find that E1s identify with their anger much more in general, so failure amplifies this characteristic into a fiery rage. Only online do they become blunt about their feelings. Lashing out at themselves is the first step towards a 1s disintegration.
6s from my experience aren't as proned to this anger issue, though not uncommon. 6s seem to take a liking to melancholic ways also, but they appear to be more whiny and defeatist.
5s get so caught up in theory, and lose confidence in all that they know to be true making them lose confidence also in their own ability to act competently in the real world as they crumble.
Last edited by Wake; 01-25-2012 at 01:28 AM. Reason: typoz killzing mE
The question is vague and responses won't be based on type as much as influences of our family of origin and our values.
There's hardly anything that upsets me more than failure. I remember that my first big failure was not being able to fix my parents' marriage. Of course, that's not something I could have ever fixed, but at my age I felt like it was my fault. I know now that it had nothing to do with me at all, but I'll always remember how awful it felt to not be able to accomplish something that you really, really want.
Today, I deal with failure differently. I still beat myself up about it for a day or so, but overall, I just shrug it off. If there's something I can do to fix it, then I'll do everything I can, but if not, I let it go. There's no reason to let something you can't do anything about drag you down. Instead, I push to succeed at other things.
Speaking from personal experience, it can be difficult particularly for those of us who plan well in advance and place a lot of attention to the details behind our ventures, only to encounter complete failure. We're naturally quite introspective, but at the same time, we do tend to reflect upon our failures quite a bit. This may be one of many attributes that distinguishes us from some of the more "dreamy" types who concentrate less on the past and what "should have been" and more so on what "could be" with the infinite possibilities that lend themselves to those who conceive them.
But our perseverance melded with our sense of obligation and inner intensity are our notable traits. We strive to be the best we can be. We place our all into what we deem to be the attainment of success. This is how we stand apart from the others.
Failure is but a road to success. I never truely feel full failure. I can always find something to keep my spirits up and trudge onwards, learning from my failures…
I feel the need to do anything I can to change the fact I failed (i.e. with exams I immediately would apply to retake it).
I feel shocked, confused/frozen and then think how I can rectify it. I never like to share big successes or failures with anyone, so I tend to keep quiet and work on it.