[Robot]

but how?! 'them' being ISTJ's of course. what to do/say to intrigue these cautious introverts for the very first time? is a first impression everything?



(in my case) first and foremost, please do not be loud and talk all. the. time.!

[Elysia]

First impression is very important as I am quick to judge (sad but true) and this first impression then dictates whether I want to hang out with you or avoid you.

A simple way of intrigueing me would be to approach me and show genuine interest e.g. asking questions etc. especially if it turned into a conversation where I was the one doing most of the talking! (It'd be intrigueing as this pretty much never happens to me, I'm the listener usually). If I felt as if you were genuinely interested in being my friend I would be more likely to approach you the next time I see you (!) though this may only happen after you have approached me at least three times

What not to do: Invade personal space as if that happens, I pretty much just want to move away as I'd feel uncomfortable. Another thing to note is that I personally feel as if my personal space boundaries are larger than other peoples' but that may just be a perception in my mind.

[Rhee]

Offer me food and I'm yours.
(Seriously. It's a sign of goodwill I happen to favour over others.)

Good conversation works too. It's fun to talk to someone who's generally knowledgeable. I'm a generalist, too, and I like conversation that flows effortlessly between numerous topics.

[Elysia]

Offer me food and I'm yours.
(Seriously. It's a sign of goodwill I happen to favour over others.)

Good conversation works too.

I wouldn't say that offering food is a sign that I value over others but I definitely appreciate it, especially if I have offered you food before (which would be very likely as I do that a lot, I feel bad if I'm eating something delicious in front of the other person and they aren't )

Good conversation is pretty much a given plus with any personality type (I hope anyway) though I do rank that pretty high in my list, perhaps more so than other people would? Have no idea.

[Sela]

If for whatever reason I am a guest at your house:
1. Offer to take my coat and hang it up.
2. Offer me something to drink, even if it's just water.
3. If there is anyone else at your house (that lives there, etc.), make the proper introductions.

If I am an overnight guest for the first time:
1. Show me where the bathroom and guest room are (or if I'm to be put up on the couch, have blankets and pillows set out nearby).
2. Lay out some towels, washclothes, etc. for me near where I will be sleeping so I don't have to ask for them the next morning.
3. Show me how to operate your coffeemaker and I will have some coffee made when you wake up.

Other random things that I notice and that impress me:
1. If I am riding with you, and you are a male, open/close my car door for me. It's not that I can't do it myself, but I appreciate acts of chivalry.
2. Likewise for opening any other sort of door.
3. Help me put my coat on if you can see that I am having difficulty doing so (again, this only applies if you are male).
4. Regardless of your gender, if you're dropping me off anywhere (even if it's my own house!) DO NOT drive away until I have safely unlocked my door and gone inside.
5. Mind your manners with wait staff. They don't get paid nearly enough and deserve to be treated well. Always tell them "please" and "thank you", even if it's just for a refill on your coffee.
6. Regardless of your gender, if YOU ask me to go somewhere, be prepared to foot the bill (the reverse is also true; if I ask you out somewhere, I am prepared to pay for all of it).
7. Personal hygeine is very important.
8. If through some miracle of nature you can remember my unique preferences (for instance I prefer my coffee to be VERY strong but at the same time half the cup is full of cream and sugar) I will be extremely impressed.

I'm sure that there are plenty more I can't think of ATM, but if anyone else jogs my memory, I'll post them

[j3321]

Are SJ's really hooked on politeness?

[Robot]

yes. there's no need to be coarse to one another. always be courteous and polite whenever possible. it is always possible.

(who else around here to rely on to keep order, structure, tradtions, manners, uphold the laws etc?)

[Robot]

yeah, what's with some people and their sense of personal space? i notice i keep taking a step back to keep a distance.

on first impression

[Thrifty Walrus]

Just be honest and up front about whatever it is you want. (my brother is an ISTJ if you're wondering)

[curious0610]

being honest and up front is one thing.... but you still have to be polite at the same time, if that makes sense. My ISTJ friend really respects it when someone can do all three of those things at the same time, especially if it's in a confrontational/negative situation.