I am married to an ISFP woman. At the begining, every thing was fine, and she kept telling me that she was in love with me. I am an ESFJ, and that made me very very happy. I didn't know anything about mbti theory and did some very horible things that ISFP's really hate. I was very controlling, and insisted that she tells me everything about herself. I was emotionally demanding. I started feeling her going away from me and insisted more that she tels me "I love you" and all the other things, you know... Untill I made that big mistake when I told her that if she continues to behave that way (not affirming me and refusing to do what I ask her), it would be the end between us!! I knew it was a horrible thing so I asked her to forgive me. After 3 days, she told me that she wanted divorce. I told her that she were very important to me, and i would never find someone like her thus i didn't want divorce!! she told me that it was me who wanted it at the first place. Dont ask me how, bu she was miraculously persuaded by someone of her family to give me an other chance.
Since this happened, she has never told me "i love you" or any other love expression!! I started reading books about marriage and relationships, and learned a lot of things about mbti theory, love languages ... I really want to make her happy with me. I really want her love back.
I must note that I am away from her because of my studies, so I talk to her only via skype and msn. When I was back and saw her, i hugged her, looked in her eyes and told her "Is it possible that I tell you how I miss you?" she laughed at me and told me that it wasn't necessary to ask that question, nothing happened!!! the first three days after my return were wonderfull and I could tell she were very happy to see me!! We had some wonderful intimacy time and I asked her if she loved me! She told me "give me time!", I didn't insist, 5 minutes later, She told me "I love you". That was quiet assuring. But the days after, she were a little moody and I didn't feel her happy anymore. Sometimes, She even didn't let me kiss her!! Now that I learned about MBTI's personality types, I know that she cares a lot, and according to her actions, I can tell that I always have a chance to have her love back!! Indeed, I told her about MBTI, and explained that I now understand her better. Although, she is extremely Intraverted, she answerwed some of my personal questions about her. I know that she is very warmhearted and good person although she sometimes shows the opposite. I know that she thinks of our relationship all the day.
please help me, and tell me what to do to make her happy. Please tell me how to make her love me again and talk to me the way she used to before the problem we faced!! (I am an ESFJ and I need affirmation, however it is not my priority now. I want to focus on her hapiness.)
Can ISFP's love a person again although he hurt them?