[friction]

People who try to dominate/command me.

It can sour my mood so bad and I can go from being apathetic about you to disliking you forever in an instant.


Hmm... I feel like I should explain...

It doesn't really matter who it is. It can be a boss, or a subordinate, but if you just tell me to go do something without bothering to be nice about it, I feel used. And it's important to me to feel useful, but not like a cog.

I don't think this will make much sense to T-types, and I can see it as being very sensitive... but yeah...whatever, I have to admit that this is how I function, as much as I dislike it... sigh.

[DeadMilkman]

are you talking about picking out things such as.. veggies??

Yes, or fruit cups or apples because those are sometimes on menu's as a side item as well.

[DeadMilkman]

People who try to dominate/command me.

It can sour my mood so bad and I can go from being apathetic about you to disliking you forever in an instant.


Hmm... I feel like I should explain...

It doesn't really matter who it is. It can be a boss, or a subordinate, but if you just tell me to go do something without bothering to be nice about it, I feel used. And it's important to me to feel useful, but not like a cog.

I don't think this will make much sense to T-types, and I can see it as being very sensitive... but yeah...whatever, I have to admit that this is how I function, as much as I dislike it... sigh.

Like if someone say "be sure to shut the door on your way out" or "shut off the air conditioner when you open a window"? Situations like that?

[Infermiera]

dishonesty, disloyalty, hipocrisy and tardiness

[See Above]

People who try to dominate/command me.

It can sour my mood so bad and I can go from being apathetic about you to disliking you forever in an instant.


Hmm... I feel like I should explain...

It doesn't really matter who it is. It can be a boss, or a subordinate, but if you just tell me to go do something without bothering to be nice about it, I feel used. And it's important to me to feel useful, but not like a cog.

I don't think this will make much sense to T-types, and I can see it as being very sensitive... but yeah...whatever, I have to admit that this is how I function, as much as I dislike it... sigh.

Oh, I understand this completely!

Once, quite some time ago, I was an administrative assistant down in Washington, D.C. I loved my boss and found my job generally interesting each day. My boss had a visitor in his office, a rather pompous-acting Ph.D. from somewhere. The guy talked and talked..... As the appointment wound down they came out of the office together and ended up standing in front of my desk to chat a few minutes more. The Ph.D. referred to a document that he was holding in his hand and my boss mentioned that he would love to have a copy of it sometime. The Ph.D. said, "Oh. No problem. She'll make a copy of it for you." He thrust the paper under my nose, interrupting what I was working on, without so much as looking over in my direction. I slowly raised my head to look at this incredibly rude, complete stranger with a deadly glare. My boss reached for the paper that was still under my nose and grabbed it saying, "No, no! I'll go make a copy of it right now!"

Later my boss said to me that he couldn't believe that guy, and that, "I was sure in another second you were going to leap across the desk and go for his throat!" Yes. In fact, that day my boss saved a man's life. (That was also the day that I realized that any idiot can get a Ph.D.)

[friction]

Like if someone say "be sure to shut the door on your way out" or "shut off the air conditioner when you open a window"? Situations like that?

Yes. The second one would definitely annoy me. I would feel like I was being supervised and couldn't be trusted with such a simple thing. I wouldn't really instantly dislike someone forever based on that, but it would plant a seed.

The first one too, depending on the situation. If it's obvious, then I would feel annoyed. If it's a request, I wouldn't mind.


@See Above has a good example. In a situation like that, I'd probably make the copies, but would attempt to be less than courteous about it.

[DeadMilkman]

Yes. The second one would definitely annoy me. I would feel like I was being supervised and couldn't be trusted with such a simple thing. I wouldn't really instantly dislike someone forever based on that, but it would plant a seed.

The first one too, depending on the situation. If it's obvious, then I would feel annoyed. If it's a request, I wouldn't mind.


@See Above has a good example. In a situation like that, I'd probably make the copies, but would attempt to be less than courteous about it.

But what if said ISFJ had been reminded over and over about it already? Being disregarded is equally annoying.

[TheGirlWithTheCurls]

Somebody bumped this thread...it gives a lot of good examples of things that get under the skin of ISFJs.

Rants and Raves

Thanks for the link, I'll take a look!

[friction]

But what if said ISFJ had been reminded over and over about it already? Being disregarded is equally annoying.

Being disregarded is their problem... not mine.

Anyway, if your point was that there may be good a reason said ISFJ might be told something over and over again, well - it's possible the ISFJ forgets sometimes, the teller should find something more important to get annoyed at.

No offense towards you, just saying how I perceive this.

[DeadMilkman]

Being disregarded is their problem... not mine.

Anyway, if your point was that there may be good a reason said ISFJ might be told something over and over again, well - it's possible the ISFJ forgets sometimes, the teller should find something more important to get annoyed at.

No offense towards you, just saying how I perceive this.

So it's ok to be annoyed at someone for being blunt but it's not ok for the person being blunt to be annoyed at being disregarded. The "find more important things to get annoyed with" argument goes both ways here. Importance is relative, most would agree that having windows open on a hot day with the AC on is wasteful and just runs up the electric bill. IMO it doesn't warrant a 30 minute sit down discussion about feelings....it is what it is.