Feeling Unlovable

**GuruOfReason** · 05-09-2012 04:10 PM

I know that NTs are disproportionately "forever alone" types. Do you guys ever feel unlovable? I am feeling that way right now. I just feel that no girl will ever like me. My rational mind tells me that this is bullshit, but my Ti is losing to my Fe on this one. When I look at Facebook, it seems as if everyone has some SO. But I feel like I dying of thirst in the Sahara in comparison.

How do you cope?

**Wanderlust94** · 05-09-2012 04:34 PM

I cope in the fact that true happiness can only come from yourself. Maybe a person can help a little in bringing it out, but it's all you in the end. That and not being tied down to one woman in a serious relationship is nice. To be honest though, it's hard finding someone I truly want to be serious with although I kinda want it... I'm going off topic now.

**onebelo** · 05-09-2012 04:43 PM

try loving yourself first

**nadjasix** · 05-09-2012 04:47 PM

Overrated. When you make yourself happy, you'll attract people no problem.

**downsowf** · 05-09-2012 04:57 PM

I don't have a problem with feeling unlovable. Perhaps I'm a bit narcissistic.

I mostly have a problem letting people love me.

**MegaTuxRacer** · 05-09-2012 04:59 PM

Originally Posted by GuruOfReason

I know that NTs are disproportionately "forever alone" types. Do you guys ever feel unlovable? I am feeling that way right now. I just feel that no girl will ever like me. My rational mind tells me that this is bullshit, but my Ti is losing to my Fe on this one. When I look at Facebook, it seems as if everyone has some SO. But I feel like I dying of thirst in the Sahara in comparison.

How do you cope?

Look at your news feed on facebook. For every one couple fawning over each other there are like 10 people wretching over the mushiness of the whole affair.

**MsCheshire** · 05-09-2012 05:02 PM

I feel you on this. It's like we have a curse. As an ENTP 8 and a woman.....let's just say I have not such a wonderful relationship history. I've decided that the solution is to find like minded others. I just joined this forum today after reading for months. I've always tested as an ENTP and 8. It's been wonderful to read this forum and see other ENTPs and other 8s who think exactly like me. That gives me some hope.

**luxurieux** · 05-09-2012 05:11 PM

I definitely understand what you mean. All of my friends have been in a relationship, broken up, moved on, and found someone else. It's a little depressing to see them finding people they like who like them back, while I'm just sitting on the side, not really caring, but realizing that literally no one has sought me out. More than anything, it makes me feel inadequate. Not necessarily that I'm unattractive, but that my personality and overall person is undesirable. For the most part, I don't really mind being "forever alone," but it can get kind of lonely (hurr durr) sometimes, especially with my friends the way they are.

**nadjasix** · 05-09-2012 05:16 PM

Another thing to consider is your own pickiness. I might not seem it, since I talk about hot dudes constantly, but I'm extremely picky about the people I'll have an actual relationship with. Extremely.

A lot of people aren't. And a lot of people play act through relationships.

**luxurieux** · 05-09-2012 05:33 PM

Originally Posted by nadjasix

Another thing to consider is your own pickiness. I might not seem it, since I talk about hot dudes constantly, but I'm extremely picky about the people I'll have an actual relationship with. Extremely.

A lot of people aren't. And a lot of people play act through relationships.

I have to agree with this. I rarely find someone I would even consider pursuing a relationship with, so the few who have sought me out in the past seem less significant because I didn't deem them "worthy" (not to sound arrogant) enough. I'd rather turn down potentials I have no real feelings for and wait for someone I actually enjoy being with.