[Draco]

I do have a question that's relative to this...

when someone thanks your post... do you then feel some kind of obligation to offer something in return?

Or when they quote something you said and gave you a compliment... then debating with yourself on whether or not you should thank the comment? (with or without the obligation to do so... so many sides to consider.)

Well mostly I act like this:

I always thank the compliment. It's someone's good intention whether it is accurate or not.
I try to thank things that I smile or chuckle at mostly, but usually end up thanking good posts from posters I enjoy reading.

The act alone of quoting me isn't enough though, I also need to find what they said a least a bit interesting.

And some times I give thanks more readily than other times, depending on my mood, energy level.

[Diligent Procrastinator]

It depends on who it is, but generally they do make me nervous and since I have no idea what to say I just mumble incoherently for a few seconds and hope they think I said something nice back.

[QuietStorm]

I find that when I get compliments, I feel more nervous than pleased. I end up not knowing how to respond, and if it's a compliment I get on the internet, I tend to think too much about how I should word the reply. The end result: I reply days later, do not reply at all, or make a very awkward reply, all of which leaves a bad impression on the person who gave the compliment anyway.

When I get those compliments in real life, my response is even more awkward, because there is the need to reply immediately, and with less time to think things through.

Anyone else have this problem?

I just smile awkwardly...or laugh... or do both, and then say 'thank you' while thinking 'gosh, "thank you" is such a weird phrase'...
I like hearing them (sometimes), because I always think I'm doing the wrong thing or I'm just 'failing at life' in general ... but I never know how to respond either. Usually I come off sounding proud or I unintentionally insult the person who complimented me by telling them how wrong they are.

[Alpengeist19]

I was actually thinking about this today. My boss gave me a compliment on my work and I just nodded and put on an awkward little smile. I didn't know what to say and I didn't want to draw the moment out too long so I just went back to my work.

[crazyeddie]

What's wrong with "thanks"?
It's straightforward and genuine.

The problem is the damn high-standards our Ti sets for us. People thank us, we start thinking about all the ways our performance fell short of what we wanted. If you want to thank an INTP, tell them *how* they made you happy - that'll help us do it again or better next time.

[corvus1noctis]

The problem is the damn high-standards our Ti sets for us. People thank us, we start thinking about all the ways our performance fell short of what we wanted. If you want to thank an INTP, tell them *how* they made you happy - that'll help us to it again or better next time.

THIS. SO. MUCH.

Every time I try to thank someone who compliments me, I end up stuttering/fumbling/making a fool of myself. It would be so much more helpful if, after complimenting me, one could tell me exactly what it was that I did right.

[crazyeddie]

THIS. SO. MUCH.

Every time I try to thank someone who compliments me, I end up stuttering/fumbling/making a fool of myself. It would be so much more helpful if, after complimenting me, one could tell me exactly what it was that I did right.

Yeah, it's that and our @#$% natural modesty. Even just acknowledging the compliment seems like hubris.

[corvus1noctis]

Yeah, it's that and our @#$% natural modesty. Even just acknowledging the compliment seems like hubris.

So often (too often), my thought process during this type of situation is as follows:

"What? Did I just get a compliment? Why....thank you! Wait, how should I express my thanks? If I make too big a show of it, people will think I'm conceited. But, if I'm too quiet about it, people will think I'm aloof or blowing them off. I want to thank them, though! WHAT SHOULD I DO??"

What really comes out of my mouth is as follows:

"W-w-what? T-t-t-thank y---Um..... What? Was that a compliment? T-t-thanks." *fumbles and awkwardly leaves*


This happens far too often... Especially if I'm lost in some other train of thought.

[goodgracesbadinfluence]

When I get a compliment I don't understand, I ask "why" or "how" which apparently translates to not accepting the compliment, which isn't true! I just want to understand before I accept it... it's like anything else.

[1mJanus]

It shouldn't have to be so hard to accept a compliment :)