[Aku]

I realize there's already a thread entitled "INTP's and emotions," but I haven't read through it and the first post seemed to cover only general characteristics of the INTP's emotional side. I'll try not to repeat what was said there.

These are my own observations and theories. It is not backed by any research. To my knowledge, I have not been diagnosed with a mental problem that would affect my emotional responses (i.e. schizophrenia), but I am an INTP.

• INTUITION - how it affects emotional response

As intuitives, have you ever found that you respond inappropriately to emotional situations? Do you not dwell on the singular "event" that is supposed to elicit an emotional response?

Speaking generally, Sensors appear to focus more on events, treating them as separate occurrences and responding to events as they happen. Intuitives, on the other hand, treat them as part of a whole, some grand association of ideas, feelings and occurrences. Therefore, they do not place significance on a single event, and do not respond to it as a Sensor would.

Now, let's observe an INTP. Their tertiary function is Si, and I believe it plays a great part in the emotional response of the INTP.

• INTROVERTED SENSING - internal associations

"Introverted Sensing often involves storing data and information, then comparing and contrasting the current situation with similar ones. The immediate experience or words are instantly linked with the prior experiences, and we register a similarity or a difference—for example, noticing that some food doesn’t taste the same or is saltier than it usually is. Introverted Sensing is also operating when we see someone who reminds us of someone else. Sometimes a feeling associated with the recalled image comes into our awareness along with the information itself."

- Taken from CognitiveProcesses (com)
(I can't post a link - I'm not a spambot, I promise.)

Let me give you a personal example:

It has been more than a month since my grandmother was diagnosed with terminal cancer. I've lived with her all my life and interact with her on a day-to-day basis, but when my mom told me the news, I didn't even flinch. She's been deteriorating for a while now and I just don't feel affected by it. At all. You can rule "shock" out as an explanation--there was no shock to begin with.

A week or so ago, though, my mom mentioned my grandmother had been throwing up. I didn't know this and she proceeded to elaborate how she had cleaned the vomit in the bathroom. The next day, when I brushed my teeth in the same bathroom, Si kicked in and it hit me all at once. I thought about the horrific effects of cancer on the body (data - past), by remembering the vomit (data - recent). Then I began to reminisce, recalling memories about her (data - past, eliciting feelings in the present).

Si is what makes some music, places or atmospheres very personal for the INTP. This is why we can seem so nostalgic, and is often why we have difficulty giving up things with sentimental value. This also explains why we cry during really cheesy scenes in movies (that hold personal meaning), but remain stoic at funerals.

Anyway... here is where it gets interesting, and I wonder if it is characteristic of other INTP's, too.

• USING INTUITION TO EXTEND PAST "CONCRETE" ASSOCIATIONS (i.e. things you have personally experienced)

When that bathroom scene happened, I did not dwell on my feelings--instead, I began to wonder what my mother must feel like, and what my grandma must think about her condition.

I experience a similar effect at funerals. I think "what must the mother be feeling right now? How is she coping with this event? What about the person's friends or spouse?" I try to put myself in their shoes, so I can act appropriately.

I'm not sure what cognitive function that would be, but my tentative guess is some crude Fe.

• PUBLIC DISPLAY OF EMOTION-- don't expect it from an INTP

I usually suppress my emotional response to an event when I am expected to show a public display of feeling (say a funeral). This remains true regardless of how strongly the emotion is felt. When I am in an emotional situation (ex: people are crying around me), my immediate instinct is to fiercely resist it, sometimes to the point of appearing aggressive or cold. Usually I feel the need to respond with an opposite feeling.
For instance:

Anger --> Levity
Sadness --> Laughter
Fear --> Laughter



I restrain myself if it will endanger my relation with the person. But during movies I do not. Yes, I laughed during the Titanic. I found the idea of prying someone's cold, dead fingers off one's arm (and then tossing them into the freezing water, no less) hilarious.

Of course, this is not to say I am insensitive. I do feel, and I can be quite empathetic. I merely feel uncomfortable responding emotionally, because I feel it will endanger me.

• DISASSOCIATION FROM EMOTION

Under stress, INTP's usually feel the need to withdraw. They are not likely to reach out to other people. In fact, they often try to distance themselves from them, to fix the problem on their own. INTP's are not likely to talk about their problems or emotions, and those who do not develop their Feeling side may resort to shutting them out altogether.

Of course, that is not a permanent solution, and eventually those pent-up emotions come out in one way or another (in my experience, usually thanks to Si).


Well, I think that about covers my main observations. I'll stop rambling now. Have you INTP's ever had an awkward emotional response to something, or do you feel you have some emotional peculiarities others don't understand? Would you want to change anything about yourself? Why?

And any non-INTP's (especially Feelers), what do you think about INTP emotions?

Pitch in whatever you want! I'm too tired to think of more questions.

[Cate]

I definitely withdraw when I'm stressed. I don't vent like my mom, nor do I explode like my dad. I just try to fix everything myself with as little outside aid as possible.

I also avoid anger completely. I don't view it as a necessary emotion. If a friend does something to me, I get frustrated or disappointed, but rarely angry. My mom says it's unhealthy because I should stand up for myself and confront them about their actions. Honestly, if it's really bad, I just won't hang around them anymore. If it's not that bad, I let it go--especially if they have been a very good friend for years. I don't let one unhappy event color my views of them.

[The Nth Doctor]

If I have any emotional problems, I don't say a word and sort it out on my own. Most problems, but every emotional problem.

I also think about how other people might be feeling. I try to put myself in their shoes. Sometimes it's with a situation like that, but I do it whenever I'm around people. Your statements about Si definitely resonated with me.

I definitely do respond inappropriately in emotional situations. I think it's partly because of lack of Fe and the fact that things take time for me to figure out (as I just said). Come to think of it, that's probably an extension of looking at other people when I'm watching a movie to decide whether I should laugh.
Also probably Ne, because I find absurd situations hilarious. Therefore if something ridiculous happens, whether it's bad or not, I start laughing (if someone's hurt I don't show it, but if it's just all around not fun I do). I also tend to be optimistic, and take things calmly when other people might be freaking out.
All those things are what I believe contributes to acting inappropriately in emotional situations.

[Pianoasis]

To be honest, I wish I could spill my heart out on somebody, but for life of me, I can't find anyone that really cares.They must all believe I'm completely dry of emotion. It's either to myself or to nothing.

[Rift]

I probably would have described it as a subtle version of a multiple personality disorder/did... one mind, identity, multiple egos; a compartmentalized self.

I do vent... although its often in a round about way. I haven't found a language or translator that works for me to provide a simple explanation to most people when it comes to my various inane frustrations or issues when the need comes up. I get exhausted having to explain the various dynamics... that excessive, stereotypical, need for clarification... as most people seem to miss the point. To which I prefer behaviorists to freudian therapists.... if it ever comes to the need for that. I usually just wind up playfully, resentfully mindfucking the latter...

and when I do breakdown to mates.... it usually scares the shit out of them -- feeling as if its so contrary to who I really am...

though if we get back to the multiple ego analogy... it's probably true to an extent. if I get wrapped up in analyzing myself its usually from a detached, impersonal view... although one more reflective of the overall environment around me... more of a mainstream perspective that reduces me to an awkward fat school girl with a notebook, bad poetry and constantly squeezing her tits wondering if these look like boobs.

while actually my more expressive side doesn't give much a fuck to it -- certainly there's concern but it plays out more to rough trade, post zen, post punk aesthetic...

both of those sides don't give much of a fuck to my insecurities or obstacles, and recognizes them for what they are... although a little more forgiving when the subject is someone else and the situation is the same... particularly if they're shagable.

though the latter side is likely a bit in denial, a bit more for the here and now, keeping taps on future propsects but not taking them too seriously... unless he's working a campaign. Though even then he puts a bit more stock in his abilities and other than adding a few safeguards, doesn't really plot too far ahead. the other sides to me seem more connected to this than the insecure side... if there is insecurity then it's far more shallow, visceral, physical pissing contest than philosophical and social masturbation, and again, recognize for what it is... I suppose there may be a bit of 'heartache' as it were... sometimes feeling as if I should be able to 'feel' it the way other people do... and the occasional desire, desperate plea, to be as oblivious as everyone else seemingly is...

which rather sounds quite a bit like an ego wankfest, doesn't it? It's not really... but I recall everyone I've ever fucked over... most of it trivial and again, reflecting onto others... most people don't seem to remember those kinds of things nor weigh it to the balance of their lives... living in this idealized bubble which they denounce selfishness yet seemingly go out of their way to justify their own.

but eh, just philo masturbation.... and I should get back to the cooking thread, revealing, more about my experiments with phyllo sheets...

[tangosthenes]

Maybe it was different because I was a kid, but funerals were not a stoic occasion for me...in fact I couldn't contain myself.

I get extremely nostalgic(the sad kind) about a lot of things... I guess its my way to process the shit I go through, I store it in the "atmosphere" surrounding the sad event.

I've moved around my entire life, but moving almost always puts me in a mode of depression and ANYTHING that reminds me of the place after I move just drags me down very low. The worst is seeing your empty room the day or two before you actually make the move.

This nostalgia gets very pent up and I can't bring myself to express it to others for fear of rejection. And it's not an unfounded fear, my family, especially the ones I expect to empathize are Si auxes and treat me like a child for weeks when it seems that they've found an area where they are strong and I am not. But even though I know it's animalistic, I still understand where they're coming from, because I have problems not taking advantage of those I perceive as excessively weak, myself.

Having people tell me what to do is equally upsetting, and I'm honestly not sure what I'm going to do with it in the future. I hate working places without having knowledge of how I fit into the machine and being able to adjust my actions based on my own accord, based on that knowledge. Being told what to do like a mouse in a cheese factory is the thing that drives me beyond my limits of sanity the fastest.

I never like to display these emotions except for when they have to go somewhere or I will turn into a glass figurine, however.

I may be an INFP...lol.

[Neurasthenia]

I didn't feel much at either grandfather's funeral I attended. Granted, I was young (6 and then 14). I had to sort of feign sadness at some points so as to not offend. I can recall several other instances where the expected response would be tears, and I felt nothing. My mother actually scolded me for this once. My sister hurt herself somehow and I was smiling. I was not happy per se. I simply was zoned out, staring at the situation that occurred, understanding it, but not really registering it in any sort of emotional way, and so my spacey self was smiling.

Then there are those times where emotions happen in me and I can't seem to stifle them. Just a few days ago, I was on this ten hour bus ride, and they had personal TV module things. I watched E.T., and while I thought the whole thing was creepy as a kid and couldn't care less about the stupid alien, this time I found myself overwhelmed with emotion. I was crying on the bus, trying to hide it, as the fellow next to me could probably see the tears rolling down my face... The part about the boy feeling what E.T. felt really got me out of sorts emotionally. And after a while I started to hate that lump in my throat and forcefully tried to shut down all the emotions I was feeling.

So, sometimes I can be touched emotionally by certain things. Other (most) times I feel absolutely nothing. But I don't think that's a bad thing. I'm mostly glad for it, actually.

What bugs me about my emotions is the sort of frustrated depression I can often feel. But that's more about feeling that everything around me is empty of any meaning. If I do not have some way to distract myself, that meaninglessness can almost overwhelm me. So, much of the time I feel slightly depressed, but it feels more like a slightly angry feeling of.... desperation and boredom, or something.

[BUtheBabyUnicorn]

I'm one of the weirdest people I know, emotionally.
I relate to all of what the OP said.
Although, I've never been to a funeral...
Even as a child, I wouldn't cry. I wasn't even crying when I was born, I always seemed to be holding back crying even as a baby.
I've cried over some of the most stupid seeming things, such as the story of Puff the Magic Dragon.