[INTP] Talking at people instead of to people

Talking at people instead of to people

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This is a discussion on Talking at people instead of to people within the INTP Forum - The Thinkers forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; Any INTPs think they do this? I saw this complaint against our type on another thread. And I find I ...

  1. #1
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Talking at people instead of to people

    Any INTPs think they do this?

    I saw this complaint against our type on another thread.

    And I find I have to agree with it. When I'm postulating or extrapolating an idea, it doesn't matter who I'm talking to; I gain supreme focus, I typically stare in the distance, and I rattle off my ideas as they come to me. In short, I'm in philosopher mode.

    When the conversation is on an important topic, the personal aspect of it leaves my mind, and I delve purely into solving the problem. My emotions seem to dissolve, and I know that I give off an air of severity. Sometimes in those circumstances, any attempts at humor by my unwitting participant are unceremoniously brushed off. They're a distraction I won't abide.

    This may also explain something that's strange with my personality specifically (I don't know if it happens to other INTPs): I can't hold a normal trivial conversation with someone, but I am perfectly capable of talking in front of a large group of people.

    It's probably the fact that a large group is easier to associate with purely on the fact that it's impersonal. It's a collective. An object you can easily talk at, rather than talk to.

    What do you think?
    OrangeAppled, Jennywocky, apathy and 6 others thanked this post.



  2. #2
    INTP - The Thinkers

    My preference is to not have to "engage myself" with the physically exhausting task of "interacting" with someone during conversation. When I am in my "natural state," I usually stare off to the distance, look at the ground, or simply lie back with my eyes closed. I think this is the physical manifestation of Ti introverting deeper, deeper, and deeper. When understanding dawns, however, Ti then rests and we revert back to our more fun "Ne mode."
    nadjasix and L thanked this post.

  3. #3
    INFP - The Idealists

    My INTP doesn't o.0 She's very well-spoken and will speak WITH you. She can get passionate about things that frustrate her, but she's never rude.
    Master of Visibility and koalaroo thanked this post.

  4. #4
    INTP - The Thinkers

    This happens all the time. I worked different forms of customer service for several years. If you don't know me, then this is what you get. I don't feel this way so much on the INTP forum, and that's one reason I like it. Talking at people seems more honest than manipulating the conversation to me. I do that too sometimes.
    nadjasix and koalaroo thanked this post.

  5. #5
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Hmmm, well for me the only time I feel that way is when I'm talking about something that the other person has absolutely no interest in. However I'm usually pretty quick to realize their glazed over expression and stop talking. It's actually more of a problem for me to have actually deep conversations with people because if the other person doesn't seem engaged I get really self conscious and think that I'm not making any sense at all and stop talking and get embarrassed. I have issues ordering my thoughts as they go out my mouth, it might be because I have auditory dyslexia, but that's a whole different problem...
    purplebubbletrouble thanked this post.

  6. #6
    INFP - The Idealists

    Yes, I've seen INTPs do this, but they don't all do it. Introverts in general can be prone to this actually.

    Have you ever seen that movie "Smart People"? The Dennis Quaid character is totally an INTP and he "lectures" people when he talks to them, haha.

  7. #7
    INTP - The Thinkers

    When I'm feeling really drained I do this with SPs. But I don't like to do this.
    apathy thanked this post.

  8. #8
    INFP - The Idealists

    I relate to the main idea of this thread. When I have something to say, I am simply excited for someone to hear it. I don't care so much to hear their reply, unless it's praise. I sort of feel that all the people in my life are just blank spaces for me to bounce my ideas and ego off of. Their input is unnecessary, except for in continuing the conversation so I may continue to espouse my ideas. I guess in that way I'm rather selfish.
    nothingnew, Owfin, Lmessi24 and 1 others thanked this post.

  9. #9
    INTP - The Thinkers

    I relate to the main idea of this thread. When I have something to say, I am simply excited for someone to hear it. I don't care so much to hear their reply, unless it's praise. I sort of feel that all the people in my life are just blank spaces for me to bounce my ideas and ego off of. Their input is unnecessary, except for in continuing the conversation so I may continue to espouse my ideas. I guess in that way I'm rather selfish.
    Yeah, that I understand. I like discussing my ideas with others so that they can attack them and I can defend. I enjoy the conversation of those who are intelligent, so I know they can understand what's going on and contribute to my ideas. Other than that, though...
    nothingnew and intrasearching thanked this post.

  10. #10
    INTP - The Thinkers

    I do think out loud some times, which could be interpreted as talking at people rather than to them, but it is more because my internal dialogue to myself has burst into audio output. I do talk to people as well in between. I think I'm very aware of interactive conversation, feedback, considering their thoughts, sincerely expressing mine to them personally, etc. when I'm engaged in a good conversation. When I'm not, I just don't talk, period.


 
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