[steffigoesrawr]

I'm sorry this is happening to you. I'd advise you to decide for yourself how you feel about this, and how much more you're willing to take in order to maybe save what's left.
To be able to make a call like that, I do think it's important to find out exactly what the other party still hopes to gain with the both of you remaining friends, since if it's just a burden from his POV, I think you'd be better off not tormenting yourself further. It can be heartbreaking, but whether you learn of and acknowledge your friend's idea of the situation or not, it's a reality you can't change. Might as well try to find out.



I don't think you did the wrong thing. Your impact on what he thinks of you isn't huge enough for your actions to 'ruin' anything, either he's forgiving or he's not, and not much you could do can change that. You had every right, as a good friend, to ask to be treated like one, and for as far as you knew, 'last time you checked' you were still friends. It just takes two people willing to be friends, and you can't force his hand in that. On that matter, in terms of social rules, I daresay the right thing to do is also to have the guts to not one-sidedly, secretly change your mind, and fess up.


There's a chance that maybe, if you can bear it, maybe someday he'll turn around and notice he left a good friend behind. I'm still considering that a real twist with mine. But I made my call, someone who crossed my line that much, that often, and with plenty of fair warnings, doesn't deserve to ruin my days. I'm a bit angry, but I hold no grudges, I don't hate this person, but I made myself get over it and move on, because that's in MY best interest.

You take care of yourself, m'kay.

I'm sorry to hear something similar has happened to you. Seems like one of the best way to get us INTPs riled, though, is to ignore us when we're finally up to speak. Nothing more frustrating than knowing someone is very intentionally not listening. Sounds like you did the right thing cutting him off, and hopefully he'll see how much his behavior messed things up,

As for mine, I can't exactly cut him off. Technically we're reconciled, and it'd be a long and frustrating process to explain to my friends why, after so long venting to them about how he wouldn't talk to me, that I'm ignoring him two days after he finally responded. I don't think they'd understand that, while he talked to be, we still haven't really communicated, and that what we've hit now is worse than being ignored. On top of that, I'd like to keep an eye on how his life is going because currently he is stationed in Kuwait in the army, and it's worrying not to know how that is going (though I only found out about it a month after he'd traveled there). Right now, we're still friends in a way. I really do hope he'll come to really talk to me one day, because I never successfully cut someone off in my life once they've gotten close enough because he'll still have that trust I gave him, likely until the day I die. To him, it seems, we are now just Facebook friends. I'd try to probe the issue more, to see exactly how he feels about this, but the combination of this new emotional distance likely means that, if he responded to a message at all, he'd simply tell me that everything is fine and leave it at that. Pretty sure I'm in the getting over things stage, though I'll see how that goes.

[Graficcha]

I'm sorry to hear something similar has happened to you. Seems like one of the best way to get us INTPs riled, though, is to ignore us when we're finally up to speak. Nothing more frustrating than knowing someone is very intentionally not listening. Sounds like you did the right thing cutting him off, and hopefully he'll see how much his behavior messed things up,

As for mine, I can't exactly cut him off. Technically we're reconciled, and it'd be a long and frustrating process to explain to my friends why, after so long venting to them about how he wouldn't talk to me, that I'm ignoring him two days after he finally responded. I don't think they'd understand that, while he talked to be, we still haven't really communicated, and that what we've hit now is worse than being ignored. On top of that, I'd like to keep an eye on how his life is going because currently he is stationed in Kuwait in the army, and it's worrying not to know how that is going (though I only found out about it a month after he'd traveled there). Right now, we're still friends in a way. I really do hope he'll come to really talk to me one day, because I never successfully cut someone off in my life once they've gotten close enough because he'll still have that trust I gave him, likely until the day I die. To him, it seems, we are now just Facebook friends. I'd try to probe the issue more, to see exactly how he feels about this, but the combination of this new emotional distance likely means that, if he responded to a message at all, he'd simply tell me that everything is fine and leave it at that. Pretty sure I'm in the getting over things stage, though I'll see how that goes.

I think you're dealing with this as well as you possibly can. Each situation is unique, and you're the one who gets to decide what you need to do in order to be able to be at peace with yourself hm.
It's not at all nice, and highly conductive for stressiness, to be 'held prisoner' while waiting for the other camp to budge.

Like I already said, if it feels better to see this through for another while, and it's not yet driving you absolutely fucknuts, then go for it, and I wish you the best with that. Sincerely hope you'll eventually get more clarity on things, ne.


Should you hit the stage of only being held back from making a decision based on what others will think, I say either consult the ones whose opinions matter to you, or ignore them. You gotta do what you gotta do, even if it may not make much sense to others.
The only reason people may object is because they're either too attached to 'standard conduct', or they're doubting your motives, and in both cases, as long as you don't doubt yourself in them, go with what comes out as 'right'. Naysayers either don't care, or don't know why.

[His Dudeness]

I had a dream last night that I had to bite my own tongue off. I don't remember much other than that but I can still feel the pain and the blood in my mouth. It's haunting.

[Digger Blue]

I had a dream last night that I had to bite my own tongue off. I don't remember much other than that but I can still feel the pain and the blood in my mouth. It's haunting.

You, my friend, have just experienced The Ultimate Introvertian Utopia.

Digger Blue

[Svensenberg]

I had a dream last night that I had to bite my own tongue off. I don't remember much other than that but I can still feel the pain and the blood in my mouth. It's haunting.

Coincidentally, after reading your post I came up with the most amazing idea for a death metal music video....

[His Dudeness]

You, my friend, have just experienced The Ultimate Introvertian Utopia.

Digger Blue

Yes. And as horrifying as that might sound, it's pretty tame compared to other things I've imagined. I've just never experienced anything that morbid in a dream and felt it even after I wake up.

Coincidentally, after reading your post I came up with the most amazing idea for a death metal music video....

Ooo, can I be in it?

[Jaryuu]

When I watched the Brotherhood of War I cried for more than half the movie. I don't know maybe it's silly, but the film is about the Korean War, and a lot of what the characters went through my family went through. My dad, who by the never cries, even he shed tears, but seriously this movie was probably one of the only movies that made me cry like that.

[Wanderlust94]

I'm posting this here because I've noticed an increase in Christian INFPs. This morning the bonding time between me and my mother consisted of laughing at dark and off colored humor and then bashing tv programs on an evangelical Christian channel. I love my family, especially at times like these.

[alexande]

I'm posting this here because I've noticed an increase in Christian INFPs. This morning the bonding time between me and my mother consisted of laughing at dark and off colored humor and then bashing tv programs on an evangelical Christian channel. I love my family, especially at times like these.

T's are more prone then F's to atheist/agnostic? I guess it would make sense

[Wanderlust94]

T's are more prone then F's to atheist/agnostic? I guess it would make sense

Yeah. I wasn't suggesting typism or anything. I'm sure many Fs would have found no problem, but I didn't want to offend anyone over there because one of our most popular threads right now is favorite Bible verses. Most Ts I've talked to, even if Christian, are very open minded and don't seem to mind pointing out flaws or making fun of religion.