[Schwarz]

Yes, exactly! I think "smart" people in general can actually be divided into those groups, not just INTPs. I was just thinking about that the other day and wondering which kind I actually was.

Did you ever read The Abolition of Man by C.S. Lewis?

[Grish]

No, I haven't. Was he talking about that?

[slowriot]

Yes, exactly! I think "smart" people in general can actually be divided into those groups, not just INTPs. I was just thinking about that the other day and wondering which kind I actually was.

Yeah made me think that too.

[likeSEEPINGwater]

ridicules question, ridicules preposition .... foolishness times ten thousand. take away my hand while yours are as $$ as ever

[WordHerder]

They are impossible to satisfy. No matter what a person does right, or how brilliant an idea is, there will always be criticism for not doing better or taking it to the next step. There is no way for an INFP to please an INTP in order to achieve a feeling of security in the social relationship. There will always be a nagging feeling that nothing will ever be good enough and that all efforts are completely wasted. This means that eventually I will give up trying to please an INTP, and instead of breaking myself to pieces struggling for approval, I eventually learn to just avoid the person. With an INTP, I never end up with a sufficient level of security to feel safe being open and intimate about ideas and feelings, so any conversation is pointless. I need to feel safe in order to talk about my more complex ideas, and if I know that something I find interesting enough to share or speculate about will be cut apart with a scalpel, I would rather keep it to myself. I always end up feeling guarded with INTPs, even the ones I like. I don't know if I will ever be able to trust one not to hurt me, even if they don't always do it on purpose.

You know, this makes all kinds of sense. I have been on the other side of it (as an INTP), and I promise you, it is intensely painful to me to feel that I can't trust my partner to take the ideas I've shared to the next level, or dissect them with a scalpel. Likewise, not doing so for my partner's ideas feels disrespectful and uncaring - as if their ideas aren't worth focus/energy.

It's a HORRIBLE mismatch - at a very basic level. One that I've decided to avoid, having no wish to harm anyone that way (or me, for that matter). So please, by all means, do keep yourself emotionally safe.

[snail]

I think I was overgeneralizing when I made that statement. There are certainly exceptions, despite basic incompatibilities. I'm sorry I was so harsh earlier.

[NoID10ts]

INTP's are nothing but sweet, cuddley, little fuzzballs. How could we possibly piss anyone off?

[AntiCompromise]

INTP's are nothing but sweet, cuddley, little fuzzballs. How could we possibly piss anyone off?

I know, right?



Pertaining to the thread, if I find myself in a situation where I'm bound to piss someone off, I force myself to run with it. Otherwise, I'll be my usual, quiet, shy-self that everyone (or at least, my close friends) feels the need to poke out of it's" shell".

Then there's times where I stop myself and think I sound like a total asshole. That might be the low, calm tone of voice, though.

I haven't met another INTP in person, as far as I know, so I can't say what pisses me off about others.

With myself, it's as clear as day, I know I'm emotional, I just can't stand crying or actually expressing those feelings around others. I just feel like a spinning-ball of awkward and since I can't really sympathize when I see someone else sobbing about something that is generally deemed "sad", I don't feel I have the right to dump my problems on them.

It'd be great to say, "Hey, that really makes me sad, even though I'm laughing and being a rude jerk about it."

[Ikari T]

I get disappointed. I have this spontaneous feeling that I should be able to connect with the INTP. But I can't do it. It is impossible, I've tried. We are from different planets.

Hey, be optimistic. Maybe someday you'll find the right INTP.

[snowqueen]

You know, this makes all kinds of sense. I have been on the other side of it (as an INTP), and I promise you, it is intensely painful to me to feel that I can't trust my partner to take the ideas I've shared to the next level, or dissect them with a scalpel. Likewise, not doing so for my partner's ideas feels disrespectful and uncaring - as if their ideas aren't worth focus/energy.

It's a HORRIBLE mismatch - at a very basic level. One that I've decided to avoid, having no wish to harm anyone that way (or me, for that matter). So please, by all means, do keep yourself emotionally safe.

I agree, this is exactly what I think now too. I know I have really hurt people - it's unintentional but I feel I need to take responsibility for it now - and part of that is by being honest about my needs and temperament. At the moment I feel I can't be trusted at all in relationships - partly because I don't want to hurt others, but also because it's become increasingly damaging to myself.