Guides to a Deeper Relationship with INTPs

NephilimAzrael

INFP - The Idealists

Just a description lad. Im too psychotic and deranged to fit the INTJ descriptions right. Doesn't matter. Its a central system model. I don't know though, it appears Napoleon is onto something.

Ikari T

INTP - The Thinkers

Well, I guess you think so. I'm ridiculously impatient with details. If something goes more than 1 or 2 paragraphs, I'd stop reading. My N is way through the roof.

cryptonia

INTP - The Thinkers

lol! ...that argument one I got down to number 5 and went "eeh... these look to be pretty good too. I'll throw them in there" and stopped

snail

INFP - The Idealists

Well.... Now I know that they're probably not actually trying to be evil, although it would probably still be hard for me to deal with such an approach on a regular basis, since I measure the success of the relationship by how well we get along. Getting along means avoiding unnecessary conflict, even to the point of not mentioning topics that are likely to cause passionate disagreements that would make it harder to feel emotionally safe with each other. Since I only argue about things that I feel are very important and that I identify with on a personal level, all conflict is traumatic for me. I am only willing to stand up for ideas that relate to my core values. Otherwise I let minor disagreements slide. In that sense, I am defending the "self" when I argue, because I am the sum of what I value, what my will chooses.

cryptonia

INTP - The Thinkers

mm... that's different... but it makes sense. I can't imagine myself arguing like that (generally if I get emotional in arguments, it's because I get the strong feeling the other person doesn't have the least bit of respect for what I have to say), but I will, at least, remember that and should be able to respect it.

DayLightSun

ENTJ - The Executives

Hey Im dating a INTJ in real life. Like he has his PhD in plastics. But I can't really read if he likes me?? I mean he spoils me and tells me I'm attractive, but he doesn't show much affection he hasn't hugged me yet!? And we've gone out on 2 dates. Is that normal?

Crazysah

Unknown Personality

Wow. This is long and informative. I read most of it. Will finish it later and then comment on it.

cryptonia

INTP - The Thinkers

well... lol I'm not sure why you're asking this in the INTP forum, daylight... the differences between INTPs and INTJs are very much superficial.

The one thing that I think is true about INTx's in general though, is that you'll never get any initiative from them in relationships. In INTPs case at least, I have no idea how much physical contact is normal in any kind of relationship, so I just kind of mirror whatever the other person does. The (two) INTJs I know are way too shy to start anything themselves, and would sooner sit and wait for a decade or two than actually make a move on someone. The male gender stereotypes aren't kind to us with respect to relationships in any way that I can think of.

Since he tells you he loves you, I'm guessing he just doesn't know what to do with you . ENTJs are good for pulling the INTs out of their shells, though, because you're easy to communicate with and don't usually listen to the culture's ideas of how a relationship "should" be... or at least are willing to shelve it if there's a better way. Go get 'im, tiger

Ikari T

INTP - The Thinkers

Ladies, PM me after reading.

banned user

INTP - The Thinkers

What I find important is for people to not try too hard to form some sort of relationship with me. When people push too much in the emotional direction, it just scares me and I find myself trying to run away from them. On the other hand, someone who takes the emotional initiative is well appreciated. How to get INTPs to open up is a tough question because they generally don't and won't open up. It takes a very special someone to get met to open up but they usual end up being people who simply accept me for who I am and who are relaxed people who can reserve judgment and who are comfortable initiating things. However, a way to get things deeper is usually to ask what's on your mind the person. I used to do this to friends and got some profound connections going though I always make sure to say that it's okay if such a question is too personal to answer and such.