[entpreter]

INTJs, what are you like when you are in love? How can others tell?

[InvisibleJim]

INTJs, what are you like when you are in love? How can others tell?

I don't think others CAN tell. *shrugs*

[entpreter]

I don't think others CAN tell. *shrugs*

well that doesn't help, InvisibleJim. OK then, how do you think YOU act when you are in love? Towards the recipient.

[Grey]

It probably varies along sexuality and gender lines. Typically, I think you'd be able to tell through small gestures - being concerned with the other person more than usual, and possibly even trying to cover it up with a phrase to brush it off (i.e. 'Not like it matters, anyway). Depending on the 'experience' of the INTJ, they may be very nervous or very assured of themselves, but I know it makes me nervous from time to time. These feelings may decrease depending on if the feelings have been shared or not.

[InvisibleJim]

well that doesn't help, InvisibleJim. OK then, how do you think YOU act when you are in love? Towards the recipient.

Ahh, that was the point of my response, I don't think I can define anything outwardly noticeable that will change about me if I'm in love. Maybe more smirking and chirpiness than usual? It's subtle.

[entpreter]

Ahh, that was the point of my response, I don't think I can define anything outwardly noticeable that will change about me if I'm in love. Maybe more smirking and chirpiness than usual? It's subtle.

*sigh*

(and because I can't just post that short word, haha, I'll add a but I don't mean it)

[entpreter]

It probably varies along sexuality and gender lines. Typically, I think you'd be able to tell through small gestures - being concerned with the other person more than usual, and possibly even trying to cover it up with a phrase to brush it off (i.e. 'Not like it matters, anyway). Depending on the 'experience' of the INTJ, they may be very nervous or very assured of themselves, but I know it makes me nervous from time to time. These feelings may decrease depending on if the feelings have been shared or not.

OK, Grey, so if you express concern and then make light of it, how does the other person know that you like them or are in love with them (unless you have told them)? How does this work? -- especially in the beginning of a relationship or before it even begins?

[Grey]

Well, the concern would likely be out of the ordinary, unless this person was specifically very close to me. I think, however, if INTJs are in love even before the beginning of a relationship, they're going to be direct about it after some time unless nervousness gets the best of them. Among males, they may be more upfront about it (even though there are some who like to reject the notion of affection altogether), but for females, they may be more inclined to search for interest of the other party.

[Wien1938]

I'll tell you this. It's not easy - I get into the position of not being able to stop thinking about her, thinking about what to say, what's appropriate, what won't work, what do I know about her?
The direct approach doesn't always work...Definitely lots of trying to make low level contact - nothing too obvious, definitely wanting to spend time around her and trying guess her feelings towards you.

[entpreter]

I'll tell you this. It's not easy - I get into the position of not being able to stop thinking about her, thinking about what to say, what's appropriate, what won't work, what do I know about her?
The direct approach doesn't always work...Definitely lots of trying to make low level contact - nothing too obvious, definitely wanting to spend time around her and trying guess her feelings towards you.

when you say "low level contact," what do you mean? Like patting her sholder or hugging? I think that the term "low-level" could be ambiguous.