[rereshaneera]

Note: The polls is only for INTJs (Vote your partner's MBTI type) and those who are currently in a special relationship with INTJs (Vote your MBTI type)

I've travelled about 10 pages of this Scientists' Community but I didn't meet any similar threads, so yeah I hope there wasn't any thread like this before.

In many INTJ descriptions in web (such as this one), it's said that an INTJ's ideal partner (lover) is an ENTP or ENFP.

For INTJs who are in a relationship/engaged/married, what I'd like to ask now are:

1. What's your partner's (spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/fiancee) MBTI type?
2. How's your relationship with them? Do you enjoy it?
3. What do you like most from your partner?
4. Do you think ENFP and ENTPs really are ideal partner for INTJ? If so, what do you think make ENTPs and ENFP ideal partner for INTJ? If not, why?

And I also I want to hear some from those whose partner are INTJs. Feel free to spit out your opinions.

[lib]

No girlfriend for quite a while but I would imagine she'd be IXTX.

[rereshaneera]

No girlfriend for quite a while but I would imagine she'd be IXTX.

Why do you want an Introvert Thinker for your girlfriend? What do you say about ENXP (As a partner)?

[bethdeth]

You know what you can do with the ENFP ideal partner type....

[lib]

Why do you want an Introvert Thinker for your girlfriend? What do you say about ENXP (As a partner)?

I'm extreme on both I and T so a girl with E and/or F would after some time get on my nerve. Short term any type would be fine but I gathered you meant long term. I suppose if I were extreme on N then it would also be a problem long term but I don't know. I used to think it didn't matter but I've noticed that for many other INTJs it does which is why ENFP is mentioned, and not ESFP, as the ideal partner.

[antiant]

These threads have been done to death already. Who really gives a shit about what someone's partner is? All that matters is if the relationship is good and it works.

[Coonsy]

1. What's your partner's (spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/fiancee) MBTI type?

INTJ as well - although neither of us knew about MBTI when we met or for the first 8 years of being together.

2. How's your relationship with them? Do you enjoy it?

Very much so - makes for a perfect pairing for us. I was once told by a psychologist (during a psych interview for a job) that our relationship wasn't "emotional" enough and wouldn't last much longer. Well, that was nearly 5 years ago, and we're both still extremely happy. Since neither one of us deals with emotional situations well, neither of us desires or needs that, it makes for a good pairing. We don't mind not being overly interactive except when we choose to be, and neither is offended when one wants alone time.


3. What do you like most from your partner?

Not sure what you're asking here, hopefully the answer above works.

4. Do you think ENFP and ENTPs really are ideal partner for INTJ? If so, what do you think make ENTPs and ENFP ideal partner for INTJ? If not, why?

I don't know that there is any one "type" that is ideal - I could never deal with an extrovert over time, they would drive me insane. Feelers I definitely cannot deal with at home - I need sanctuary in my house, not to drag in problems. I have some ENFP and ENTP friends, and they make good friends for me, but we are far from "best" friends, and I would not want to be in a relationship with any of them.

Like I said, DH and I didn't know about MBTI before we met, or even for years afterwards. Finding someone who fits what you need in a partner is far more important. It may have worked out well for us since in typical fashion for me, I over analyzed all aspects of what I wanted/needed in someone, and then literally sat down with my list after dating someone for a couple months to see if they met the requirements. When I finally met someone who I couldn't come up with a logical reason to break up with (even though part of me was ready to try the next thing), I stayed with him, and have zero regrets about my decision...for someone who is so emotionally detached from things, going about it logically worked well. Granted, there was still that initial attraction, and we have certainly connected on a deeper level over time, but the reasons we're still together were because I took the time to look at my list(s) and realized he fit everything I wanted/needed in someone.

[Eye of the Potato]

I'm extreme on both I and T so a girl with E and/or F would after some time get on my nerve. Short term any type would be fine but I gathered you meant long term. I suppose if I were extreme on N then it would also be a problem long term but I don't know. I used to think it didn't matter but I've noticed that for many other INTJs it does which is why ENFP is mentioned, and not ESFP, as the ideal partner.

Wouldn't the problem of being too extreme on the N be your problem? One that an esfj could help you correct? Same with the F and E.

An esfp is your opposite so that is out. Being in a relationship with your opposite can cause neurosis actually.

[bethdeth]

I really can't see why an ENFP would be my ideal partner. I was always led to believe that people with something solid or things in common would make for a better partnership. Don't get me wrong...I'm not saying that it wouldn't work for some but for me it has proven extremely problematic.

I lived with an ENFP who brought to the brink of death with screaming personal space issues. I had to explain absolutely everything before a hindering of process was called off. I become irritated whenever I think of the many ways it was wrong. Even when it was right it was wrong. He was unhealthy and probably a caricature of an ENFP....but it serves as a caricature that I just can't deal with....I love my peace and quiet....

For me being very high T and I, I would also have to go for someone a little more sympathetic to my type...I don't have the nerve or patience for that kind of shit ever again. I think I did a test somewhere which indicated that ENTJ/INTJ/ISTJ was more to my taste.

Even after all this is said...this is only theoretical...I would not actually choose a type to be with...it's the person first, then check to see if they are insane, then check their type....I don't believe you choose a love by type.

[Eye of the Potato]

I really can't see why an ENFP would be my ideal partner. I was always led to believe that people with something solid or things in common would make for a better partnership. Don't get me wrong...I'm not saying that it wouldn't work for some but for me it has proven extremely problematic.

I lived with an ENFP who brought to the brink of death with screaming personal space issues. I had to explain absolutely everything before a hindering of process was called off. I become irritated whenever I think of the many ways it was wrong. Even when it was right it was wrong. He was unhealthy and probably a caricature of an ENFP....but it serves as a caricature that I just can't deal with....I love my peace and quiet....

For me being very high T and I, I would also have to go for someone a little more sympathetic to my type...I don't have the nerve or patience for that kind of shit ever again. I think I did a test somewhere which indicated that ENTJ/INTJ/ISTJ was more to my taste.

Even after all this is said...this is only theoretical...I would not actually choose a type to be with...it's the person first, then check to see if they are insane, then check their type....I don't believe you choose a love by type.

My intj sister had the same problems with me. I don't think enfp/intj is ideal either. She's with en esfj and they are both extremely happy with each other. She is a much nicer well rounded person because of him.