This thing with my male INTJ friend has been going on for two years now.
It is the longest story you will ever here in you LIFE. Well not exactly, but I won't bore you with all of it.
Basically the "relationship" goes round in circles because he won't say if he likes me or not, he has yes slept with me, and in his ways tells me he likes me. I on the other hand am scared to lose him as a friend if I asked him if he wants a relationship or not. Or scared of rejection, I don't know. But I am fed up, two years is enough, but part of me always has my hopes up when he flirts with me and acts kind. I have a real lsoft spot for the guy, he could wrap me around his finger. I want to tell him, "Either say you like me or not, or be done with it."
What has got me asking you is, recently (today actually) my INFP guy friend told me he slept with another girl,(about a month ago) which of course has made me very upset. The friend didn't do it out of curelty, he only said it because I asked him who this girl was. I don't know the girl, but he went a long way to meet her, and she pops up on his Facebook a lot. I'm not the jealous type really, but I don't like it. He hasn't boasted about her to his friends, like the others (his ex girlfriends), and me, so this makes me think he is saving my feelings, but my ESTJ friend said he may be ashamed of what he did.
The guy in generally has cheated on both his girlfriend he has had with me, he has never liked any of the girls he has been out with, so he says, and always comes back to me. I'm strung along, sitting, waiting, wishing (a bit of Jack Johnson in there) that one day he will pick me up off my feet, and he will have the courage to tell me how he feels one day. He has told me previously that emotions aren't something he really pays attention to, as in he doesn't think about them much.
When he told me (he was drunk) how he felt about me, I was sober (I don't drink) all I could say was "Ok." to whatever he said to me, I didn't know what to say, he shocked me because he doesn't say much about "us". So I am sitting there like a mute, probably giving him the wrong impression. So I am blaming myself for him sleeping with someone else, yet I would... because I want to believe he is a good person, and possibly I am in the wrong.
As an ENFP it is hard to keep this all in, and I want to know what the best way to deal with this from an INTJ point of view (of course other people's views are welcome). Is this normal INTJ behavoir? =/
Sorry this is pretty long, it could have been four paragraphs longer.