[INTJ] What do you consider feminine? - Page 3

What do you consider feminine?

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This is a discussion on What do you consider feminine? within the INTJ Forum - The Scientists forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; Thank you, everyone, for responding. Femininity is a complex topic. We need to consider both the social constructs of feminine ...

  1. #21
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Thank you, everyone, for responding. Femininity is a complex topic. We need to consider both the social constructs of feminine appearance and behavior and roles. Our personal opinions are a response to the social constructs amplified, denied, confirmed, or rebelled against.

    For me, femininity is a collection of behaviors and attitudes that are reflected in appearance and mannerisms; these are dependent on the specific situation and the role I fill within that context.

    At work I chair meetings, go toe-to-toe with my boss, freely offer opinions, inform co-workers when their lack of performance impacts my ability to do my job, and willingly chastise people who patronize or otherwise belittle me. I am more assertive at work. My appearance is always business conservative.

    At social events (professional or personal) I flirt a little with the guys (smile, glance sideways, touch an arm), am less open with opinions, will not publicly criticize or chastise, and prefer to defer to a male companion (if I came with one). My appearance is suited for the occasion: jeans or dress, makeup, hair, jewelery.

    Although I prefer to behave with a quiet manner, I will kick ass and take names if necessary.
    thehigher, bethdeth, Snowguard and 5 others thanked this post.

  2. #22
    INFP - The Idealists


    I think women that look feminine are attractive. Even then though I like short hair too..... like....... I like feminine looks but I like masculine traits. I like a girl who isn't afraid to show her dominance or isn't afraid to show she's smart. I like it when they own their own character... their own personality. Like.... Kate Beckinsale in underworld.... or Monica Baccarin in V. They are masculine but obviously feminine too.
    geGamedev and PyrLove thanked this post.

  3. #23
    INTJ - The Scientists


    It means a set of assumptions and sterotypes, differing between people, that people (mostly arbitrarily) assign to a gender.
    I have no definition, no sterotypes, because I find the idea of assigning behavior traits to a gender pointless and inane. The people I know I treat like individuals - and they act like individuals. "Feminine" is irrelevant.
    geGamedev, Goodewitch, Expat in Japan and 4 others thanked this post.

  4. #24
    Unknown Personality


    Quote Originally Posted by Molock View Post
    I detest super feminine women, I prefer those who are more down to earth and concerned with more than how they appear. Jeans and running shoes are more attractive than high-heels and mini skirts for example. No makeup is more attractive than pink nails and red lipstick. Shorter, practical hair styles are more attractive than elaborate hair styles. Also, having a very independent mind and being accepting of differences will get you much further with me than good looks. Being confident in who you are is really attractive.

    On another note, if your idea of a date consists of me picking you up and driving you to a fancy restaurant ... well I don't want to have anything to do with you. Wanting to be treated as an equal and being unique goes with having an independent mind. Let's do something different
    I agree with everything he said here... and this:

    YouTube - P!nk - Stupid Girls
    Molock, Snowguard and PyrLove thanked this post.

  5. #25
    INTJ - The Scientists

    I have found that looking like a woman and acting like a man works as a powerful combination. When I dress gender neutral, I seem to become invisible, so I dress specifically feminine even though it is completely foreign to me. I don't know where I stand on that politically though. I supposed I have sold out in that respect.
    thehigher, Snowguard, PyrLove and 2 others thanked this post.

  6. #26
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Quote Originally Posted by calliope View Post
    I have found that looking like a woman and acting like a man works as a powerful combination. .
    I've seen the term 'velvet hammer' used to describe this. I found out while googling the cocktail of the same name. Some of the other uses of the term I'll not mention here.
    PyrLove thanked this post.

  7. #27
    INFP - The Idealists


    Quote Originally Posted by calliope View Post
    I have found that looking like a woman and acting like a man works as a powerful combination. When I dress gender neutral, I seem to become invisible, so I dress specifically feminine even though it is completely foreign to me. I don't know where I stand on that politically though. I supposed I have sold out in that respect.
    yep. that's what i was talking about earlier.
    PyrLove thanked this post.

  8. #28
    INTJ - The Scientists

    so like wearing a dress, but smoking a cigar? i could get into that....
    PyrLove thanked this post.

  9. #29
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Quote Originally Posted by calliope View Post
    I have found that looking like a woman and acting like a man works as a powerful combination. When I dress gender neutral, I seem to become invisible, so I dress specifically feminine even though it is completely foreign to me. I don't know where I stand on that politically though. I supposed I have sold out in that respect.
    You haven't sold out. I find this to be a very powerful combination in professional settings. Most people feel more comfortable around individuals who appear to match cultural gender norms. People won't hear what you are saying if they are trying to figure out what your role is. Setting your audience at ease is the first step to gaining credibility and respect, both of which are necessary to be effective in the workplace.

    I'm not advocating tight skirts, 3" heels, lots of cleavage, and bling (all of which are distracting and image-destroying for other reasons). There are several examples of mentioned above of characters who are feminine but with masculine traits. Also look at Brenda Lee Johnson (Kyra Sedgwick) in The Closer or (Dr. Temperance Brennan (Emily Deschanel) in Bones.

    TNT - The Closer: Home

    FOX Broadcasting Company - Bones TV Show - Bones TV Series - Bones Episode Guide
    calliope thanked this post.

  10. #30
    INTJ - The Scientists

    I found that I could not come up with an answer using the train of thought this thread was following. There is no doubt about what I am attractive too, but that isn't the question, right?

    The question is about femininity -- which could equally be define a man or a woman, right? If so, then perhaps for me it is fluidity of movement, something I cannot describe about voice, and something equally difficult to describe about eyes. Femininity seems less about what goes on the body and even the anatomy of the body itself.

    Where everything seems to go sour for me, as others have said, is when too much (society) is applied to the body. As few layers as possible is ideal for me. (There's my bit about attractiveness.)
    PyrLove, calliope, green4keeps and 1 others thanked this post.


 

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