[INTJ] Do you have difficulty admitting your errors? - Page 2

Do you have difficulty admitting your errors?

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This is a discussion on Do you have difficulty admitting your errors? within the INTJ Forum - The Scientists forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; In my personal experience, sometimes these situations are resolved by switching to another topic or ending the discussion for a ...

  1. #11

    In my personal experience, sometimes these situations are resolved by switching to another topic or ending the discussion for a bit. Give the INTJ some time to think about it without immediate pressure of a discussion.

    Typically INTJs keep pondering for a while why a certain discussion didn't go smoothly and felt unsatisfactory. High chance that they'll come back to you later. For me sometimes I just can't see the angle you're coming from at that moment and I need some space to consider what your viewpoint could have been. Doesn't mean that I'll come to the conclusion that I was wrong, but more that definitely I'll make an effort to get back to a mutual understanding.
    Dan E, Therese C, ninjahitsawall and 3 others thanked this post.

  2. #12

    If it doesn't hurt the relationship and you love her to bits then don't make an issue out of it. Seriously? Hear me now. People, no matter their type are basically shyte. At some point this amazing friend of yours will do something really crappy and then you'll probably hate her afterwards. In meantime live in that wonderful state of denial when we still think others are trustworthy. It won't last forever so just enjoy it while you've got it.

  3. #13

    It looks like you have fallen off EndsOfTheEarth.
    People, no matter their type are basically people.
    there are good people, then there are bad. you don't see the fly trying to mate with a spider or a wasp romancing a hornet.
    but frogs and toads get along well rib-biting in the same pond.

    Maybe you need to take a more targeted approach at who you interact with, and not be constantly scanning the sky looking for a halk to come along and devour you, rendering you dead. Its this mentality in fact that will land you in a clump of thorns to get out of, or hop off a cliff accidentally or otherwise.

    you cannot expect people to be bad, otherwise you will see nothing but. I strongly advise you go to the biggest baddest brute you encounter, and wrap him in a hug, go home with or without and watch frozen a few thousand times.
    and stay up looking at pictures of cats.. and stay off cracked.

  4. #14

    I don't have a problem admitting when I'm wrong, or adjust when someone brings up a fair point that contradicts what I say. If my actions turn out to have undesired consequences I will admit to my error too.

    However, I've run into this problem with some people before, where they have perceived me as an annoyingly stubborn person who refuses to admit when they are wrong. Are you sure this is not about saying sorry, rather than admitting an error? I find that my communication issues with these people tend to arise when they think I should apologize for something, and I don't see any reason for me to apologize, because from my perspective, they have turned an objective observation into an emotional statement. Even if I point this out, I'm still expected to apologize sincerely. At the very least, lay it out for me what I did wrong so I can evaluate that instead of taking on the attitude of "you should know what you did and apologize!"
    I don't know if that's your issue, but just putting that rant out there in case it helps.

    Anyway; I frequently admit to being wrong or making an error, taking responsibility for my own actions. However, I am not going to apologize or say "I was wrong" if I'm not internally convinced I did do something wrong, or if it is just because the other person thinks I owe them something or want me to make them feel better. Then an explanation and exploration of the miscommunication should suffice to further understanding on both parts - or just simply leave the issue.
    ninjahitsawall, EyesOpen and Insider77 thanked this post.

  5. #15

    No. When I find out what the truth is I go out of my way to meet up or call people to tell them that I was wrong and what the truth is. Sometimes I'll correct myself for things I said to people months, sometimes years ago. Even tiny details, like some "animal fact" or anything.

    I think INTJs just give the appearance that we have a hard time admitting being wrong because of how hard we stand our ground on our main areas of interest, which translates to our general demeanor.
    mOchO, ninjahitsawall, birdsintrees and 3 others thanked this post.

  6. #16

    If I had any errors, admitting them wouldn't be a problem. Problem is I've no errors.

    On a more serious note, just because someone perceive something I do as an error, doesn't make it one. I'm right until I've been proved otherwise, either by other people's arguments or by my own change of mind. And in these cases I've no difficulties saying my original thoughts were wrong and / or behavior bad. Moving on is more important.
    EyesOpen, birdsintrees, RexMaximus and 1 others thanked this post.

  7. #17
    INTJ - The Scientists

    I'm actually having a difficult time answering this because:

    1. I feel like we don't like to be wrong.
    2. An immature INTJ is more likely to spout something they aren't sure of and defend it.
    3. A more mature INTJ is less likely to spout something they could be wrong about and will defend it until proven wrong by others or themselves through research.
    4. Depending on the subject an INTJ may be more likely to go out of their way to correct themselves as being the source of incorrect information feels......uncomfortable.
    ninjahitsawall and birdsintrees thanked this post.

  8. #18

    Thank you all for your answers, and I really appreciate it. I wont reply to you/go on about this, because I've kinda realised that this was a "pointless" thread for me to make. I was a bit mad/sad when I made this, and I just needed to put out a little rant, lol. Like @EndsOfTheEarth said: "If it doesn't hurt the relationship and you love her to bits then don't make an issue out of it." And I agree in this particular situation. I think our relationship will last forever, though. You just need to find some good people! They're out there! :) But yeah, again, thank you all.

  9. #19

    Me: Hey bro, Do you have difficulty admitting your errors?
    INTJ: I guess.

    ^hope this helps
    lilysocks and amazed thanked this post.

  10. #20

    No; in fact -- I seek this type of correction [as anything else stunts intellectual/knowledge gain + growth]. I am usually the first humanoid to admit to any such flaws, either as a gesture of practicality, humility, or I am simply tired of hearing the specimen rant. Those that sufficiently lack knowledge, or whom are not up to par with the information at hand, I will propose corrective means (e.g., to fill their gaps), however, if the situation does not improve due to psychological depletion/inabilities to work with me, I will disengage that toss around trivial matters (personal opinions/feeling rants).

    It should be noted, however, while I can oblige to the circumstance on bases of pragmaticism, personal (rants)— usually will not be enough for me to admit to error. Indeed, I have malfunction(s) simply saying ("I made an error"), when (X)-specimen has failed demonstrate how so. Do not take this as stubbornness—or repulsion to ("admit when wrong"), but rather I am rather dissatisfied with the ambiguity/lack of information (demonstrative means), of said flaw made -- as I cannot correct, resolve, nor pose a solution to otherwise, ("mysterious errors"). Slobbering and snotting up your nose (&) emotional-tantruming (&) pointing sharp fingers at one another, does not assist your case.

    This usually results in (Post #1) trivial discussions over otherwise, ill-informative empty rants, because I haven't made any steps to conflict-resolving this "unknown" trivial error. Arguing with me, for instance, demonstrates there is a communicative flaw -- but not necessarily an error within the previous premises asserted. Which is usually my focus of any discussion; error within my premises -- rather than miscommunication. A majority of this is simply red-herring from my/the main objective.

    Thus, one must demonstrate it (sufficiently so) said mistakes, so I can take the proper best steps; to correct it.Which usually revolve around pondering, and some form of hyper-rational alternative. If not, I will fester in it for quite some time and cause great distress for the J-user. My (J)-demands a closure of some sort. When (J)-types are strenously pressing the issue at ad-infinitum; it is closure seeking for the (J). (X)-J-type is dissatisfied with your means of closure; thus will pose their own or force it. Do not open anything; if we cannot finish it directly on the spot; or at least very soon in the same session.

    It needn't be hyper-rational, if you want me to be a tad more sympathetic to my articulation of the situation [keen on personal/feeler-designed details and preferences], then should you appeal to my (Fi) in some sort, rather than tackling my (Te/Ti) always with your (Fi). Appealing to my (Fi) revolves around a demonstration of how (X)-conflict making you dysfunctional in some way -- rather than temporarily disturbed (in disagreement) with my points. To demonstrate you are "dysfunctional", you must coherently point (&) indicate how I am causing great psychological/emotional distress over long-period(s) of time due to my own malfunction(s) to correct said error. Upon this, I will ease up.

    However, do not take this as an inability to resolve conflicts (productively). One needn't ("admit to error") when there isn't any, simply to resolve a conflict. I will simply withdraw from the discussion, let (X)-individual relax, (&) speaking nothing else of it.

    If you can demonstrate my error; I will retract any assumptions, statements, et al made at that time to which were incorrect (&) correct the malfunction on spot. In my experience, however, it is usually (F)-types whom are reluctant to resolve conflicts directly or ("on-spot"), and let such issues fester for quite some time, if not, drag such information on a strenuous amount beyond that which is necessary, and reject my steps to otherwise; demonstrate how I can better sympathize with the issue at hand.


    I will say I differ however, and do not re-open otherwise, self-defeatist, unproductive "unsmooth" conversation(s) and likely wish to move on, unless there is an unresolved conflict (e.g., high-functioning problem at hand) that you can demonstrate is of great importance (e.g., makes you or I dysfunctional); or conflicts with other productivity, (&) other external matters. Otherwise, I deem most of these matters rather trivial (&) do not wish to continuously drag out such qualm.

    I haven't a clue why something such as, ("small stupid discussions") minor detailed mistakes would stretch over a span of a 30-second discussion. In fact, I dislike this "keen focus" on trivial error (&) detail (e.g., nitpicking), as it ignores my overall [main point]. I haven't the time.

    My ENFP specimen used to ("nitpick") small details (&) throw them back at me as if they are any strong importance to the discussion; while ignoring all said important point(s) made.
    Last edited by Catwalk; 03-14-2017 at 12:30 AM.

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