Hellooo PerC! Yes, it's August already.
This Member of the Month has been a prolific contributor to this site since October 2011. You can spot him in various threads offering his ever insightful information and widsom. I know several members that look up to him and admire his knowledge and eloquence on the topic of cognitive functions, especially. He's quite an authority on the site! So without further ado, let's give a big thanks to our August MOTM, a title truly well deserved!
Motto: I don't really have a motto. Perhaps "the unattainable hot chick
seems to always end up marrying the goofy dude that makes everyone else
go 'really?'- So here's to being the goofy dude from the get-go."
What's your real name? Phil
How old are you? 31
What country are you situated in? United States
Are you single, dating, or married? Single
Do you have any kids? Nope
How would you describe yourself in one word? Dreamer
What is your favorite place to travel to? Oh man this is hard. I love Seattle in the summer, but Miami is gorgeous too. I'd love to visit Australia.
What is your favorite color? Cerulean blue
What is your favorite weather? Sunny, cool with a crisp breeze. Just enough for a sweater or light coat.
What are your favorite books, movies, tv shows, and video games? I love Malcolm Gladwell so I generally pick up anything by him. Steven Spielberg is my cinematic hero along with guys like Ridley Scott and I've had the pleasure of meeting them both a few times. My favorite TV show of all time (and the show that made me want to become a director) is Star Trek: The Next Generation, but I was also a sucker for Lost. I also enjoy big event specials like the Grammys and Oscars both of which are can't miss TV for me (I love spectacles). I played video games when I was a kid but sort of dropped it about 3rd grade, but I have a soft spot for Zelda and Mario Kart.
What are your favorite foods and beverages? Barbeque (I lived in the south for a while). There's this place called Fatburger I eat at all the time and Hot Dog on a Stick (So Cal people know what I'm talking about). If I'm in Vegas I won't miss a burger at Holstein's at the Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas.
What is your favorite animal? I used to be a cat person, until a very whiny one moved in recently, so I think I'm gonna say I find alligators intriguing.
What kind of music do you enjoy? A lot of people say they listen to everything, but really only mean all things pop. I literally listen to just about everything. I've got Benny Benassi, Wynton Marsalis, Jill Scott, Foo Fighters, John Williams and Joe Hisaishi (gotta love Nausicaa), Skream, gospel and religious music, electroswing, Piazolla tangos, Kanye West, Jay-Z, Mos Def, Marcus Roberts, Gerswhin, Schoenberg, Vivaldi, eastern asian music, DCI Drum Corps (go Blue Devils) and on and on.
Do you play or follow any sports? I'm a huge college football fan.
What are your favorite websites to visit? Personality Cafe. I'm on this site probably more than I should be. I also have an interior design hobby so I spend a lot of time at Houzz and on Adam Tihany's website. Occasionally I'll become a political junkie and read Nate Silver or Politico or Huffington Post (though less so these days). My computer is also parked on Facebook, which I was a very early adopter of, when it first came out back in 2004.
What is your greatest weakness? A tendency to devalue myself. I have a tendency to sell myself short, or think that everyone else is better or could do better than to celebrate my strengths. Its something I'm definitely committed to working on though.
What is your greatest strength? I think I'm a decent communicator. I notice that teaching or conveying ideas and information comes fairly natural to me. I actually taught at a university for a little while a few years ago, and though I'm not good at repeating the same thing over and over, when someone needs an explanation it comes easy for me. I'm also, I think pretty good at sensing what's going on with people under the surface and as such I've developed some very close friendships.
What motivates you? I'm a dreamer. I dream stuff up and then want to see it come to pass. Its the reason I got into filmmaking because its the only medium that lets you (assuming you have a big enough budget) imagine anything and make it happen. I suppose architecture or interior design comes close because you are creating environments. When I was a kid I wanted to be a theme park designer so I could dream up fantasy worlds and then actually be in them.
What is your philosophy? Take the good with the bad. I'm learning that life does not always go according to plan, sometimes bad things happen to the best of us, and some people live better by accident than other's do by principle. But in both cases life goes on. Celebrate each moment and don't be overly self-focused. There's a great big beautiful world outside of my mind.
What are you passionate about? Seeing the things I dream up come to pass. My greatest satisfaction comes from creating (though ironically I would not consider myself a very creative person relatively speaking).
What kinds of jobs have you had? I've worked a theme parks, I've worked for major television and film companies, I've worked on a number of major feature films in various capacities, I've been an instructor, I've mixed sound for major rock and roll bands...kind of a mixed bag for me but it all mostly relates to media and entertainment.
What are your pet peeves? Inability to see things a different way. People who think that just because someone doesn't think they way they do, that the other person must somehow be stupid. People who are stuck in their ways. People who have no imagination or worry to much about silly stuff. Prudish women.
What are your fears? Not being able to accomplish what I want. Being seen as incompetent. Dying (not death itself but the process of dying, like being in an airplane crash - if the plane just blows up fine, but I don't want to have to experience it).
Who do you look up to? People who have made it and are at the top of their game. I've been lucky enough to have worked around people who are literally the best in the business at what they do from Super Bowl winning coaches, to Oscar winners. Its great to have role models who can show you the ropes. I always try to be observant and listen. That includes even people who know more about MBTI or Jung than I do (and there are numerous), when someone speaks I tend to listen as there is always something more to be learned.
Do you have any pets? There are two pets in my house but they are not mine =)
What do you do for fun and relaxation? Take long drives, go out and party with my friends. Listen to music. I love night clubs (not a dancer or anything I just love the energy, its such a change of pace from my normal quiet life). I love to drive through beautiful places and I love photography.
How did you get involved with personality typing? Well my degree is in Sociology and Psychology so that was my first influence of Jung and others (its also why I tend to try to argue from a psychological and sociological disposition). But I became more interested in it a few years ago as I was doing some self-discovery and just became sort of hooked. One of the things that helped me was the ability to learn something and then turn around and teach it. I think that's why I got better at it because when you are teaching something, you better know what you are talking about (and sometimes people come along and call BS on me which is fine). But I think its the combination of interest, trying to figure myself out and helping others do the same that keeps me hooked.
Also I love Jung's approach and his very open and holistic way of looking at things. Always searching deeper and taking everything into consideration to just the prevailing dogma or even his own experiences. He and his proteges can so freely converse on everything from the biblical Abraham to Marilyn Monroe and I find that very inspiring.
What is your Myers Briggs personality type? My MBTI best fit is INFJ. But from a Jungian perspective I'm probably more of an Extraverted Intuitive (not so much the seer type). It's just that I don't really fit the MBTI ENFP or ENTP models.
What is your enneagram type? 4w3 (or 3w4). Sometimes on the inside I'm a bit of a 7 though.
So what's it like being an INFJ and an enneagram type four? Well considering I don't think I've been any other type I don't have any real point of reference. It's what I know and I'm okay with it. INFJ 4 seems right (and no matter how hard I try on a test I can't make the results change if I'm being honest) but I try not to bind myself to these things as hard laws.
Do you think the different personality theories give an accurate description of you? Perhaps in combination. What I've learned is that you cannot put people in simple boxes. There are aspects of MBTI INFJ I identify with and aspects of it I don't. People are very complex, actually moreso than the theories used to describe them.
Which personality theory do you prefer, and why? I'm a Jungian. I stick with the original because it is broad enough to allow the diversity of people.
Do you use personality typing in the real world? Yea and it has helped me significantly. Especially when dealing with people who see things differently, like Sensation types. Where I used to just rip my hair out and not be able to figure out what they were getting at I can know spot the differences and even see things the other way.
Has personality typing helped you in any way? My relationships with people are better. I can 'read' people better (or at least have a working theory behind my perceptions of them). I'm much better at being able to predict people, but obviously how I type people is very influenced by my own perception of them. You always have to catch yourself and ask "is this person really XXXX or are you projecting that onto them?"
Do you prefer to associate yourself with certain types, and why? No not really. I get along pretty well with everyone. You kind of have to in life. I know intuitives who drive me nuts and sensation types that I love. My dad is a raging Fe-dom (I think) and we sort of don't see eye-to-eye (mostly because of my relaxed "lets see what happens" approach contradicts his "this is how things ought to be" disposition). Most of the people I am close to are people who I click with for reasons other than type. I can find reasons not to like someone or to love them.
How did you initially find your way to PersonalityCafe? I think just a google search. I hang out here and over at PerN.
What made you join us? This was a friendlier environment than most type communities and one where you could freely exchange ideas. Some of the other sites, though they offer great information, do so with a sort of combative air, which is fine for people who are of similar knowledge, the discussion can be insightful, but it also wears on you after a while. Not every discussion has to be a food fight, especially over something trivial like Jung's description of Fi. This site stays pretty fresh (even if it comes at the cost of sometimes having to say the same things over and over again like "learn the cognitive functions!" There are also some really wonderful people on here like @Ace Face, @JungyesMBTIno, @Eric B, @fourtines, @Stephen, @Jawz, @MrShatter, @Owfin, @Spades, @PlushWitch and probably a million others that are skipping my mind.
Why did you choose "LiquidLight" as your username? I dunno seems like an interesting name. Like the name of a nightclub or something, or perhaps a vodka. There's no real reason behind it, this is the first place I've ever used that name, but for whatever reason its sort of esoteric enough to capture me.
What's up with having no avatar? :O LOL You know I never noticed. I'm so bad at exploring this site. For like 4 months I had no idea people could post on my homepage, I felt like an idiot because all these people had written me and it must've seemed like I had just ignored them. If the little "you have mail" thing never popped up I probably would never have even gotten this message.
If you had to choose your favorite forum on PerC, which would it be? Probably Cognitive Functions, but I think the Gently Honest INFJ Mistype Thread is a hidden gem on this site.
What do you like most about PersonalityCafe? It's always fresh. It's always popping, there are all sorts of interesting discussions going on.
What do you dislike most about PersonalityCafe? It's very entry-level which is a gift and a curse. On the one hand its great that there's a lot of enthusiasm about typology and self-discovery, on the other hand there is a tendency for people to, I think, misapply it to explain or hide behind things that aren't really typological in origin. Shyness doesn't mean introversion. And being shy and intelligent doesn't automatically mean INTP, nor does shy, intelligent and sort of a prick mean INTJ LOL. But I understand that like myself, people are just trying to figure it all out (life) the best way they know how and I think its wonderful that so many people are so interested in self-discovery.
What is the most important thing you've learned here? Patience, humility. Not running my mouth about something I don't really know what I'm talking about. And that sometimes people who will come on sites like this who just want to pick fights and be argumentative, but they often have a very short shelf life. Let them have their week or two of trolling and then they fade away.
Do you have any advice for the community of PersonalityCafe? Just keep optimistic. Everyone has good days and bad days accept them both. I recognize there is a marvelous community of individuals on here who have a lot to offer and they should never be ashamed of that, or feel that the only place they can be themselves is only on PerC. The other thing I would advise is to learn for yourself. Don't just accept anything on here at face value, most of us are not experts or trained MBTI practitioners. If its worth it to you, pick up a good book because this stuff can get confusing and incomprehensible really quickly if you can't properly filter the wheat from the chaff.
If you could have any super power, what would it be? Umm does the ability to make Megan Fox or Scarlett Johansen fall in love with me count?
What do you know now that you wish you'd known five years ago? Don't get fixated on a specific moment in your life. Too often I waste time wishing I had done something differently, said something differently or whatever. What happened happened, the question is what are you going to do with today. I can't change the past, but I can affect tomorrow.
What do you believe is your greatest accomplishment at this point? I'm still working on it =) If I ever get to direct a major feature film I'll get back to you (but for now its just small-time stuff).
Tell us something about yourself that we don't already know. I have lived all over the country. Twice in Florida, in New England and in the Pacific Northwest. The only one I dont think I'd want to live in again is New England, as I don't do snow well (or the New England Patriots).
What is next for you? What are your plans and goals for the future? Going back to school to continue getting better at my skills. Working more on bigger and bigger projects. Hanging out on PerC. Future looks bright I think.
Give us your parting words. Appreciate the people you have in your life. Don't take things or yourself too seriously. Understand that every level brings a new devil and that success often doesn't feel like what you think it might. But also that life is beautiful (this coming from someone who once flirted with suicide). I think most importantly forgive. Forgive the people who may have wronged you (purposefully or inadvertently), forgive your parents for not being perfect, and most importantly forgive yourself for only being human and having flaws, issues, moments of weakness, moments of fear, insecurity, jealously. Everyone is here for a reason and there is no reason to let life be miserable over something that will never make your epitaph. Unless you're in the World Trade Center, or locked in steerage on the Titanic, your problems are probably not that bad. Perspective is everything.