When I was much younger, i always imagined myself living in an idyllic cottage with my own garden near the lake. Because it was all in my head, it was perfect. It was perfect because I am an INFP, I love peace and quiet, so by default I am supposed to be connected to nature right?
Some years down the road, I realized I really don't, and my reasons are probably strange:
- I hate stepping on grass. I hate soil. I hate the uncertainty that there might be worms crawling underneath me and the thought of it freaks me out. I mean, all insects, worms and anything related freaks me out. Yes, even butterflies. Yes, I am a pussy.
- Beaches scare me too. I don't hate the sea, but it is not something that is needed in my life. There are too many crabs moving at warp speed across the sand, and those creatures are EVERYWHERE with their mini pincers. They look like insects. Sometimes, worms fall from the tree onto the beach benches. When I am inside the sea, I feel strange objects against my skin (e.g. seaweed or worse still, poisonous jellyfish) and you cannot see from the surface what it is.
I have yet to meet anyone in real life that relates to me, and my friends think I am crazy when I scream at things such as a butterfly flying pass. Even when they stare at the pavement while walking beside me, I get really paranoid that there is a cockroach nearby and they are not telling me because they don't want me to embarrass them with my horrible screams.
Is this strange? Anyone else here who gets freaked out by nature too? Please don't be mean to me, I don't mean to degrade nature in any way!