To INFP Men: ... Where are you?

**neologismaker** · 08-15-2011 02:30 AM

I know a couple of INFP women, like... two? There are two who come to mind who are mentors of mine but I've met several in the course of my life. I've met one INFP guy in my whole life and the only reason I knew he was that was because our mutual professor had us take MBTI. He once told me, "You know, you can stand here." That was the extent of our acquaintanceship. xD

I volunteer with lots of organizations, I art--'tis a verb as of this very moment--and as approximately half the time I'm an INFP, I would like to think I do a lot of INFP activities.

I'm not asking just to stalk some poor, innocent Healer kid; I'm not like that. I'm just curious about you all since I've never met one! I know NFs are rare, but I've known several ENFJ guys and even one ENFP. Do you men encounter one another or are you the only INFPs you know? What are you guys like? (World's worst question, I know. I'm sorry xD) Do people confuse you with other types (types I could've confused you with, perhaps)? Would you say you're different than female INFPs? Female INFPs, feel free to join in: of the others of your type you've found, have most of them been women?

**AdAstraPerAspera** · 08-15-2011 02:43 AM

I'm the only INFP I know in real life. I am absolutely surrounded by ENFP's of both genders though. Anyone else I know doesn't follow MBTI besides one or two people, and they've always said, "Yep. Clearly an INFP." If anything, I really feel like I'm closer to being effeminate despite being quite well built and into rock climbing and everything else. I'm not entirely sure how'd I'd describe myself. Eccentric? Emotional? Passionate? Quiet? Hmm, not quite sure really.

**Dane418** · 08-15-2011 02:45 AM

I don't think I have met an INFP before. Its possible one of my friends is, he thinks and cares about people deeply but we've grown slightly apart over the last couple of years.

I'm not really sure how people would perceive me. I know people always say I am very easy going and friendly. On the inside I might be despairing about something or having a rapturous daydream or whatever, but thats how people have said they see me. "I can't imagine you ever being angry about anything" etc. But, at least for me, if someone brings up something I'm passionate about and I have a chance to talk (especially if I've had a few drinks) my excitement in being able to talk about something I care about is obvious.. I can remember one instance where a very close friend of mine was sitting with a grin on her face and said it was because of how enthusiastic I was. So I suppose you could keep an eye out for that type of thing. Sorry I can't really be of more help.

I guess I could add, odd sense of fashion maybe. I just wear what I feel is natural but people (especially males) comment on how I'm wearing jeans with slippers, a death metal shirt and a bright purple jacket embroidered with flowers out. Uhhhg. Its the type of thing I don't really pay attention to and end up embarassing other people with I think. Of course, thats just me. No idea about other INFPs.

**Acey** · 08-15-2011 02:56 AM

if you met me you'd probably think i was some stuck-up unfriendly person or a really silly person who cant take anything seriously, both personas not being very original. the true infp nature arises with the people closest to him...and well..the internet :)

**Luke** · 08-15-2011 02:58 AM

I'm a very quiet and reserved person, I'm probably one of the most quiet people I have ever met. People describe me as being very calm and laid back. I am also a very sensitive person. I spend most of my time deep in thought. I don't follow any trends and I don't really fit into any particular social group.

**neologismaker** · 08-15-2011 03:21 AM

I really feel like I'm closer to being effeminate despite being quite well built and into rock climbing and everything else. I'm not entirely sure how'd I'd describe myself. Eccentric? Emotional? Passionate? Quiet? Hmm, not quite sure really.

None of that speaks to me as effeminate. Of course, you probably know yourself better than I do, but based on just those adjectives, no. :P I'm at least hoping men are supposed to be allowed to describe themselves as eccentric or passionate! You would all be rather boring if not. I've sometimes confused some ENFP guys for INFPs since my INFP female friends have said they mostly talk when they're passionate about something, which I agree with. How would you say INFPs are different from these ENFPs?

But, at least for me, if someone brings up something I'm passionate about and I have a chance to talk (especially if I've had a few drinks) my excitement in being able to talk about something I care about is obvious.

I have seen that in myself and my I-FP friends (especially the drinks for some |D Dear Lord.)

I guess I could add, odd sense of fashion maybe. I just wear what I feel is natural but people (especially males) comment on how I'm wearing jeans with slippers, a death metal shirt and a bright purple jacket embroidered with flowers out. Uhhhg. Its the type of thing I don't really pay attention to and end up embarassing other people with I think. Of course, thats just me. No idea about other INFPs.

Interesting. I am already jealous of this jacket~ I love color! I am relieved to see at least one intuitive young man whose version of "dressing differently" does not mean rolling out of bed and wearing his pjs to work; I was beginning to think only artisans interpreted that as "effort."

Hmmmm so you guys don't sound too terribly different from my female INFPs... I will find one of you somewhere, someday.

**Rather Unusual** · 08-15-2011 03:26 AM

I imagine we make a substantial contribution to the male suicide rate. Try the graveyard.

**Dane418** · 08-15-2011 03:29 AM

Originally Posted by Rather Unusual

I imagine we make a substantial contribution to the male suicide rate. Try the graveyard.

Ah mate, I shouldn't laugh.

Seriously ;_;

**neologismaker** · 08-15-2011 03:39 AM

I imagine we make a substantial contribution to the male suicide rate. Try the graveyard.

No wonder you're so hard to find--oh man, I shouldn't have said that.

Perhaps I've had a really lucky sampling of female INFPs and I know I'm blessed with a chipper personality, but that sort of surprised me! D: I mean... I suppose I struggled with depression also... Anyone care to explain this one? :P

**Decay153** · 08-15-2011 03:47 AM

Originally Posted by neoloGismaker

None of that speaks to me as effeminate. Of course, you probably know yourself better than I do, but based on just those adjectives, no. :P I'm at least hoping men are supposed to be allowed to describe themselves as eccentric or passionate! You would all be rather boring if not. I've sometimes confused some ENFP guys for INFPs since my INFP female friends have said they mostly talk when they're passionate about something, which I agree with. How would you say INFPs are different from these ENFPs?

I feel we'd be quite hard to identify in the general public. We're either too quiet to notice or could pass for an ENFP when we're comfortable/passionate. I'd say social INFPs differ from their E counterparts in that their moral compass is rooted deep within and is well reflected on, (at the cost of more practical, outward things). Es keep their identity and ideals a bit more flexible to work with others, where we do that to the extent that it won't mess with our values. Basically, we're more aware of our own feelings of harmony and values (Fi) than of outside patterns (Ne). I don't know if this makes any sense..

Originally Posted by Rather Unusual

I imagine we make a substantial contribution to the male suicide rate. Try the graveyard.

Well, that was dark.