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This is a discussion on An INFP and her views on friendship. within the INFP Forum - The Idealists forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Originally Posted by snail I just find it hard to feel intimately connected with someone over a long distance, because ...
When I have a potentional "best friend" I stay friends with them for years, but over the years I can't help but notice more and more things about that person that bothers me but I keep it to myself for a long time. I keep it to myself because I'm scared it will hurt the other person's feelings and fear that there will be a conflict.
Once I can't stand the person, anymore, I can't bring myself to do anything about it but to just give them the cold shoulder and just.. stop talking to them completely and wait until they figure it out and just.. change.
I do that all the time I thought it was only me ,I've done that with 3 of my friends ...
You crave deep, meaningful relationships, but the pure, perfect ideal you have created is unrealistic. You build up all the best qualities of people, but once you get really close, the negatives start to pop up...and since the whole personality is magnified to make their positives look better, the negatives are likewise magnified. My INFP friend and I used to hang out EVERY DAY. After we had a big messy issue and kind of stopped communicating, we started to hang out again....but we don't do it as often, and I usually let her set the tone. I don't push to spend time with her, but I'm always willing to do stuff with her when she wants to.
I think ENFPs are like icecream to INFPs...we're wonderful and exciting and very easy to love...but too much of us will make you sick. Yet you keep coming back to us, indulging until it gets to the point where you just can't stand the thought of icecream ever again.
Having alot of introverted intuitive friends, I've learned the value of patience. I respect that the INFP will contact me on her own time and I don't have to see her daily. Text messages work great for the in between time to keep in touch...especially if I want to randomly make her laugh during work. "OMG! I'm texting with my miiiiiiind. I better keep my thoughts clean.... Nudity. Striptease. Bootyslap. Damn"