[lycanized]

I apologize for coming off in a bad way...I could have said that in a less rant-ish way lol >.<

[Molock]

I always feel like an outcast or somehting on here....

Yeah, me too. I find most INFP's here a little too touchy-feely or soft. I am pretty certain that the INFP type fits me well but I don't necessarily identify with being super emotional and politically correct. Sometimes being offensive and direct is necessary. I am also bothered by how terms are not being used accordingly to their definitions, but that is something most types do. For example, when we were discussing loners it was pretty obvious to myself that most posters didn't verify the definition before typing away.

I suppose it doesn't help that I identify strongly with enneagram type 4

[Himu]

I used to frequent two forums other than this on a regular basis: one about graduate schools, and the other about a sports team.

Both forums were filled with personality types that sharply contrast with INFP. Rarely would you come across someone who could fit the INFP profile.

Do you even want to know what conversations were like in those forums?

They will disagree with everything you say, you will disagree with everything they say, you feel small and cheated if you reply to someone, and there is no hiding that opinions that dont match their views are not welcome.

Compare that to this forum, specifically INFP subsection, I feel a lot more at home. At least if we dont agree about everything, we can see and understand the other INFP for who they are. You wont get that luxury in the other forums.

Even inside Personality Cafe, I hardly frequent other personality threads or general threads, because its generally not healthy for me to go through those sort of interactions that take away more of my energy.

It might not be everything for everyone, but it is the closest thing to an ideal forum for me as an INFP as possible.

[Maiden]

I feel different from the INFPs on this forum. A lot of INFP have different interests from me.

[Hinastarr]

I don't get it when people feel so different, but they think they're the only ones who are different. Or when INFPs feel that they are different or unique, but no one else is. That is in your head.

The truth is that everyone is different and unique...no one can be put into a box. But only some people are ultra aware of these boxes or these social norms...or these cookie cutter images of what they should be. Some of these people see that they themselves cannot be put into these boxes, but they think that everyone else can, and others see these boxes as totally obsolete figments of the imagination that no one can be put into...that's the sector I fall into...that's why I hate stereotypes so much...

But the reason why I say that everyone is unique is because I think that people are too complex for there to be a standard for what is normal...and you're not gonna be able to totally relate to anyone, not even other INFPs. There is way too much to human beings to be able to use MBTI to explain us completely.

This idea of everyone being different is also why I am so interested in humans...it's why everyone is interesting and why I want to know so much about them...


Sorry for the rambling...

WOW. This post was so deep and beautiful. I couldn't agree more with what you've posted. To be honest, I've always felt I was different from those around me and have thought myself to be a freak because of this, but your post truly helped me see the truth about society in a strange way. I've always believed that SJ's, such as ESxJ's and ISxJ's were the type of people whom were normal and proper in the human community, but by reading what you've written above, I can see that even the people whom may seem to be the most conventional in our society have quirks and unique qualities of themselves as well.

Like you, I also LOATHE stereotypes with a passion, as despite my having had believed I wasn't normal compared to most, placing people into a specific stereotype is almost similar to placing them within that box you posted of. Human beings are simply much too complex and developed to be deemed as some sort of a stereotype that doesn't even trace the depths of their personality fully. Besides, I've also realized how incredibly boring and mundane society and our entire globe in general would be if we all were so called "normal" and had personalities that fit into a specific box. Most of the positive alterations and innovations in our history likely would never have been accomplished to start with if none of us had attempted to escape the box, and the thrills that come with life's spontaniety would most probably not be nearly as fulfilling as they are, as everything would be conventional and planned out. Life, in general, is spontaneous, and the beings whom thrive throughout it are the results of these surprises, and without the uniqueness we each have to offer, the world would've likely remained primitive and none of today's developments would be existent.

It's our differeneces that have shaped up our world as it is, as despite the fact that we all suffer from similar pains throughout our life, not one of us, even identical twins themselves, are entirely identical, as we all have a distinct way of resolving the everyday issues we are faced with on a daily basis, as well as beliefs that are unique from that of others'. Other people may be able to provide support towards your thoughts and you may be able to find a detail, whether it is minor or major, within them to be able to emphasize with, but really, the only person whom truly knows who you are is YOU. You're the only person whom knows the exact feelings and emotions you undergo and the strategies you need in life in order to be able to survive and prevail, meanwhile all others can do is attempt to understand you feelings and search for this indisclosed strategy needed in order to be able to get into your inner core.

Basically, as my new signature (the saying invented by me, BTW) says, "We are all the same, but not one of us is truly identical". Thank you, Anti-Helena, for writing such an amazing post (and I'm sorry if I send to be exaggerating with this response, as well...).

[Blueguardian]

I voted yes only because there wasn't a "sometimes" or "sort of" option. Reasons vary but, common differences for me are my choices for mediums of expression. I prefer to work with wood, clay, finger pant, etc. I am not too big on poetry or story writing.
Another difference, though perhaps its just a jaded view, I seem to notice a vast majority of INFP males make friends with girls quite often. I have only one female friend myself, and she is the girlfriend of a male friend or I probably wouldn't have ever formed a friendship with her either. People don't randomly share things with me for the most part either, unless they are somewhat close friends. I used to think I must give off some sort of creepy vibe or something in public. Haha.

The last thing, I am sure is mostly in my head but, I feel as though I am much less of an intellectual INFP from the ones I have gotten to know online. I am not self bashing, just an observation!

[Acey]

I don't get it when people feel so different, but they think they're the only ones who are different. Or when INFPs feel that they are different or unique, but no one else is. That is in your head.

The truth is that everyone is different and unique...no one can be put into a box. But only some people are ultra aware of these boxes or these social norms...or these cookie cutter images of what they should be. Some of these people see that they themselves cannot be put into these boxes, but they think that everyone else can, and others see these boxes as totally obsolete figments of the imagination that no one can be put into...that's the sector I fall into...that's why I hate stereotypes so much...

But the reason why I say that everyone is unique is because I think that people are too complex for there to be a standard for what is normal...and you're not gonna be able to totally relate to anyone, not even other INFPs. There is way too much to human beings to be able to use MBTI to explain us completely.

This idea of everyone being different is also why I am so interested in humans...it's why everyone is interesting and why I want to know so much about them...


Sorry for the rambling...

I agree with everything u've said. People that believe they are more unique (smarter, more creative, more enlightened, etc) than the general population are usually very arrogant and dont give credit to those they view as "normal."

But that wasn't what my post was about

So let me clarify:

I feel a lack of connection with everyone because i thought myself to be defective and different (not in a special unique way, but in a broken way). But after finding this forum, i still feel very out of place in it, regardless of the similarities that we share, so i'm trying to figure out where this insecurity towards others stems from. I didn't think that coming here i would make a bunch of friends or have great deep conversations, but ...i guess what im trying to say is that i dont feel any less alien knowing that there's other people that are going through the same things as i am.

[lycanized]

I know I'm gonna be contradicting myself a bit here, but I do know that there are some things that can't be rationalized. I can't relate to feeling broken or defective, but I can relate to feeling like there is no one I can relate to. And yeah, it's not a good feeling thinking that you just don't fit in. It's not really rational, so rationalizing it does not really work, for the most part.

This feels so much like E 4, and one thing I've read about E 4s is that they become happy once they let themselves out and actually make themselves available to others who may be able to relate to them. So you have to break that wall down, I suppose. No matter how uncomfortable it may be :/

[Acey]

I know I'm gonna be contradicting myself a bit here, but I do know that there are some things that can't be rationalized. I can't relate to feeling broken or defective, but I can relate to feeling like there is no one I can relate to. And yeah, it's not a good feeling thinking that you just don't fit in. It's not really rational, so rationalizing it does not really work, for the most part.

This feels so much like E 4, and one thing I've read about E 4s is that they become happy once they let themselves out and actually make themselves available to others who may be able to relate to them. So you have to break that wall down, I suppose. No matter how uncomfortable it may be :/

thanks for the advice the wall is made of pretty good stuff these days but i guess i just need a bigger hammer:)

[SenhorFrio]

while i feel we all are diffrent and i activily try to be diffrent,i feel real sympathy with you guys and thats rare for me. we're all passionate about SOMETHING. one major difference is i find alot of the people to be alot more introverted that me, like i enjoy time alone and with people almost equally.but really i still feel i belong here