INFP Simply too much!

**Sizzorhandz** · 02-22-2010 03:09 AM

I want to know if I am the only person that feels that I have to reallly owrk at relatinoships. I mean I love my firends, but its like having a relationship is alot of effort. Some of the people I know dont understand this, I'm happy with my 6 friends.

**Razvan** · 02-22-2010 07:04 AM

I think there are a lot of us who feel the same, I gues you have to try to work to maintein only those with whom you can totally relate, with whom you have things i ncommon and areon the same wavelenght. This way it will also beeasier, as they will be able to understand you easier, so less work is needed.

**kusay** · 02-22-2010 08:15 AM

Well I think we all have to work for our relationships, even none INFP ...and it's not always easy.

6 good friends more than enough for me.

**Razvan** · 02-22-2010 08:28 AM

I can't really say I have 6 food friends. I do have friends, people I go out have fun, am able to talk about my problems, but I don't know how many would actually step up to help me if I was in trouble...

**Pantheory** · 02-22-2010 08:29 AM

Originally Posted by Sizzorhandz

I want to know if I am the only person that feels that I have to reallly owrk at relatinoships. I mean I love my firends, but its like having a relationship is alot of effort. Some of the people I know dont understand this, I'm happy with my 6 friends.

Yeah, I know what you are talking about, though I only have three friends, still, I feel like I have to put a lot of effort into the friendship. Yet, I bet they put in as much effort as we do- they never say it, but they really do.
I never know whether my friends are actually wanting my friendship until I am rather depressed, in trouble etc.. They pull me out of everything and anything, and even though it feels like I'm always putting more into the relationship, I never notice those little, more important things that they do behind the scenes.

We all put effort into a friendship- if we didn't, you'd know when they won't hang out with you anymore, or just seem careless (Which can be quiet confusing, because some people like to seem they are care free when they actually aren't).
So, if you are happy with your friends, that means effort is put in all around, otherwise your friendships would all fall apart by now.

**starfruit** · 02-22-2010 08:34 AM

Friendships are so hard for me, even with the INFPs I know.

**jtbeachbum** · 02-22-2010 08:38 AM

Originally Posted by Pantheory

Yeah, I know what you are talking about, though I only have three friends, still, I feel like I have to put a lot of effort into the friendship. Yet, I bet they put in as much effort as we do- they never say it, but they really do.
I never know whether my friends are actually wanting my friendship until I am rather depressed, in trouble etc.. They pull me out of everything and anything, and even though it feels like I'm always putting more into the relationship, I never notice those little, more important things that they do behind the scenes.

We all put effort into a friendship- if we didn't, you'd know when they won't hang out with you anymore, or just seem careless (Which can be quiet confusing, because some people like to seem they are care free when they actually aren't).
So, if you are happy with your friends, that means effort is put in all around, otherwise your friendships would all fall apart by now.

I agree. Friendships are relationships with people. And that means that it's work, no matter what. People are complex and extraordinary. So there's no getting around that it's going to be some work involved. The end result of having close friends that you can be real with and really count on is worth the extra effort of being involved in their and and them in your lives. I'd much rather have a few real friendships that were difficult sometimes, but were real, than have loads of acquaintances that I barely even knew.

**Sizzorhandz** · 02-22-2010 08:42 AM

But only two of my friends wil actually contact me to have a conversation when I'm not with them. My friend relationships are hard, I cant' imagine a realtionship with a significant other.