[amanda32]

I agree with Blueheart:



He will get his due. And by people who can dish it out a lot better than you. Have no worries. Sit back, watch his life, because if he behaves this way to a friend, then he's going to make some pretty nasty enemies all on his own.

And, revenge is exhausting.

I truly believe the old adage which says, "what goes around, comes around". Meaning, he will get payback. These type of people always make trouble for themselves. Sooner or later, he'll piss off the wrong person and you'll be happy and successful and your life will be full of love.

He's on the road to misery: professionally and personally. You might even feel sorry for him soon...

[Cyberbear]

Folks,

thank you. I'm pretty sure he gets what he deserves, but I don't feel like that the band that I've put so much effort into and does pretty well has to suffer due that. It's my thing too, not just his. What the hell I'm hoping?

He's the frontman and main songwriter, creative contributor, but the organizing and business part are too complicated for him to fully understand how things are connected. And since we are from a small country and music circuits where we're in are small and everyone knows everyone, acting like an asshole can mean ban for life. We have a really good live band reputation and so far people around us have been nice and helpful. I want it to go on.

But I must admit that we've had serious talks about behaving nice with all the people and issues we have to deal with to stay on our bandwagon and keep things going.

Anyway, I'd like to figure out how to deal with his type Exxx (ENFP, ESFP? we're quite opposites but we('ve had) click(ed) in many levels) when it comes down to such issues. More about him: single mom's only son, almost 27 and never had a dayjob (extended university studies), from a small provincial town, now hanging in "artsy" circles, got a lot of admirers due his spontaneous and cretive persona and (IMHO) has gotten shallower over the years.

[Cyberbear]

He's on the road to misery: professionally and personally. You might even feel sorry for him soon...

Well, twelve years of friendship, six in a band. I'm already sorry for him...

[Suigintou]

I would fucking stab him.

[Perseus]

Find him (ESFP) a Rattlesnake ENTP mate and when the crash comes tell the Wolfman ENTJ.I would not like mess with a Puppet Master !

[Cyberbear]

We're going to have a band meeting on tuesday.
I've been talking with bass player and second guitarist about the issue today.
Noone's happy, but seems like it was a bit predictable.
By now I compare myself with an alcoholic's loving and everforgiving wife.

[Sizzorhandz]

I suggets talking with your bandmembers, with him there and without him, you may not be the only one with thease feelings. My brother is in a band, they had to get rid of the lead singer cause he got to screwed up to hava good show. now they are working on a new album, with out him, and I think they sound better, they are more preductive. I know it's a hard decision to make, but you seem to be the one putting your all your passion into the band, why should you leave?

[Cyberbear]

Well, Scissorhands. I have talked to others as well a bit since the issue surfaced. Something seems to bug everyone in that ongoing misery. But since we've had the success we've never dreamed about, everyone has just kept his mouth shut about the issue. Ok, sometimes we have had to tell him that at this or that point he's gone too far, but there hasn't been a serious talk about it. Now I broke the ice.

Thinking back, the alienation has been going on for a year. He's just more and more stranger to me with his moods, ideas and attitudes. He's an eccentric anyway, I'm pretty much used to it, but when the negative attitudes come along, oh God! And he denies it and blames others (me) for being too pushy or demanding when it comes down to band issues.

Could on of the reasons of his beahviour be that in larger scale he still has no genera clue what do do with his life? His story of the life is written somewhere in my posts above.

(I'm generally a happy INFP. Tested before dropped outta university. I was lost in there. The MBTI put everything into the place and due the self-awareness I've been concentrating on thing that really matter to me. Y'know: do your thing, do it well and all the good things come along. Got the dayjob I like, my opinion is often highly regarded in my field, band that has worked it's way up, a few good friends and many helpful accquainstes, but no true love because I'm an INFP male )

[Nancynobullets]

No offence to your parents, but if you had been my kid I would have handled her myself, and honestly I would have told you that if she did it while I wasn't around to go ahead and knock her on butt - you had a right to defend your body.

I didnt have the best parents.

[crazitaco]

revenge??? stick a potato in his car muffler then have a good laugh. im a evil INFP >:D
when i crave revenge, i stick to really mean funny pranks. like a flaming brown bag filled with dog shit on their porch so when they see it they bust the bag and step in dog crap. they dont emotionally or physically hurt someone, but they do piss them off >:3 warning: you may feel bad, but thats what revenge is!
PLEASE dont take my advice too seriously though, its pretty bad advice!