Have you ever felt so deep into depression you don't want to feel better? I have enough of my wits about me to realize that this isn't healthy, and I've been reading a lot about how to cope with depression, but I can't bring myself to do those things-- at least not wholeheartedly. I want to feel better... but I don't. It scares me to think that way, because then who knows how long I could live like this. Do you know what I mean?