Does anyone have these traits?

**Greenbeanx** · 12-02-2009 12:51 PM

Does anyone make direct eye contact all the time to people you are talking to regardless. I have noticed since age ten I do this to everyone I am talking to not just sometimes but every time. I concentrate on one person at a time. Can can also read facial expressions, tones of voices, pauses between words and body language and feel what that person is feeling at that time. I have never heard of anyone making direct eye contact with everyone while talking so I am scratching my head. Also I have noticed that they first thing I notice in a picture are the eyes no matter what. Its like my eye home in one others eyes automatically and I have to force myself not to look at their eyes if I do not want to. I do know that from reading body language books that it is important to look into someones else when meeting them or talking to them so that my explain why I do it sub-consciously. Also I have noticed that I can suppress my body language quite well in situations or I lack while other peoples body language gives them away.

I do know that some people would call me an empath,HSP, or Indigo but I do not know about that. I do know that everyone on my moms side inherited these personality or genetic traits. What does everyone think? What are your views on this. Thanks Everyone.

**INFpharmacist** · 12-02-2009 02:27 PM

No. I don't keep direct eye contact. I make it occasionally, but that's it.

It's hard for me to concentrate whenever I'm looking at someone. I'll lose my train of thought.

**TurranMC** · 12-02-2009 03:24 PM

I know people who will always look me directly in the eye when speaking to me, though I do not know if they are INFJs. It annoys me greatly since I hate eye contact >_>

**Greenbeanx** · 12-02-2009 04:46 PM

Thats strange.. I never have a problem ever with people looking me in the eyes. I'm not sure why I do it with everyone but I do. I know one girl that said she hated eye contact but she had no problem looking into my eyes. I know my ex-fiancee said my eyes look pure when she looked into them. I also know some people have said that my eyes are to transparent. That when I look at them they can feel I can look right through them. Why does everyone hate eye contact I wonder?

**Danse Macabre** · 12-02-2009 06:16 PM

I always look people in the eye. In fact, I usually make a conscious effort to look away every now and then so I don't freak them out. As to why some people do this, no idea o_O

**Greenbeanx** · 12-02-2009 08:11 PM

Well I'm glad I found one of my sisters that does this :-) Maybe I can try figure it out. What does looking in the eyes normally represent? I figure that when I make eye contact it says I want to listen to what you say and I am interested professional, socially, or romantically with the person. I usually just look at the person especially sitting down and they start talking about themselves which people enjoy and they are comfortable. I do not have to do anything but just listen and look at them to achieve this. In a business sense, I am listening fully to what you say and acknowledging their needs.

Granted I can only deal with one person at a time. With larger groups it is difficult for me to focus my attention on all of them.

How do our profiles match up DanseMacabre? Is their any common ground? Do you come from a family of introverts? Do any of your members share traits you have?

**Irulan** · 12-02-2009 08:40 PM

I tend to think that if it runs in your family it may be a learned trait.

I do tend to look into peoples' eyes most of the time, but certainly not all of the time.

I think I would be afraid of you if I met you in real life. I am mildly acquainted with a guy who I swear can see through me, and it scares the hell out of me. I can not look into his eyes. (Pretty sure he thinks I have a crush on him since I respond so awkwardly, and he definitely knows I'm married.

) That may be due to my enneagram functions though. I can certainly understand a 5 being afraid of you looking into their souls. We are very private people. It might feel invasive.

But you haven't seemed to have a problem with it, so maybe you are able to do it in a very caring-while-looking-into-peoples'-souls kind of way.

I hope you are not bothered by my saying that I might be scared of you if I met you in real life. I suspect that I sound rude when I'm half asleep. If I do then ignore me. I like you.

**Danse Macabre** · 12-02-2009 09:06 PM

Originally Posted by Greenbeanx

Well I'm glad I found one of my sisters that does this :-) Maybe I can try figure it out. What does looking in the eyes normally represent? I figure that when I make eye contact it says I want to listen to what you say and I am interested professional, socially, or romantically with the person. I usually just look at the person especially sitting down and they start talking about themselves which people enjoy and they are comfortable. I do not have to do anything but just listen and look at them to achieve this. In a business sense, I am listening fully to what you say and acknowledging their needs.

Granted I can only deal with one person at a time. With larger groups it is difficult for me to focus my attention on all of them.

How do our profiles match up DanseMacabre? Is their any common ground? Do you come from a family of introverts? Do any of your members share traits you have?

I do come from a family of introverts, and my dad and have the same enneagrama and MBTI type He always looks at people's eyes too. But you and I don't seem to be too similar. I think I'd tend to agree that perhaps it's a leaned thing..

**thegirlcandance** · 12-02-2009 09:12 PM

I do quite often, but not all the time. It may just be a learned trait or preference you've developed -- not necessarily personality trait.

**Greenbeanx** · 12-03-2009 12:29 AM

Originally Posted by thegirlcandance

I do quite often, but not all the time. It may just be a learned trait or preference you've developed -- not necessarily personality trait.

It may be because everyone in my family does it I think. I think my grandma did it but I'm not 100% sure. If she always looked into my mothers eyes when she was a kid, then my mother learned to make direct eye contact and so did I. Its hard for me to because when I make eye contact the other person I do not think they do not feel any discomfort, I do not think, because I'm always in a good mood. Even when Im in a bad mood I may not fully show it on the outside and they still feel comfortable.