[INFJ] Life lessons from 2011 and life goals for 2012

Life lessons from 2011 and life goals for 2012

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  • 2 Post By curious0610
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This is a discussion on Life lessons from 2011 and life goals for 2012 within the INFJ Forum - The Protectors forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; I made a similar thread last year so I thought I would make one for this year. Let's make this ...

  1. #1
    Unknown Personality

    Life lessons from 2011 and life goals for 2012

    I made a similar thread last year so I thought I would make one for this year. Let's make this an open thread :) Feel free to write anything about your thoughts on 2011, life lessons you learned, difficulties you overcame, resolutions you've made for 2012, quotes you want to try and live by, milestones in life you look forward to, ANYTHING. Life is a journey, and self-discovery during the journey is what matters the most, so please feel free to share with fellow INFJs :)
    Curiously and unico thanked this post.

  2. #2
    Unknown Personality

    I'll start! In the second half of 2010, I started realizing I was really unhappy and discontent and restless with my life. I was determined to make some changes, make some moves, save up some money to travel, and get "out there" in the world. Well, that's what I did in 2011. Only I encountered a lot of unexpected things, both good and bad, and I learned some things about myself.

    One of the major problems that caused my unhappiness was because I kept defining myself through things outside myself, and I was able to realize this more when I started getting so wrapped up with some of these things. Academic achievements. Physical features. "Skills" and "talents". Relationships, platonic and romantic. Approval from authority figures. Etc. All these things can be good. But bad, when you start defining yourself purely on these things. As a result, I found myself putting a lot of hope and self-esteem on the line, depending on these things. I've since then drawn the line and have decided to seek happiness and contentment with just being ME, without all the extraneous things on the outside. It's kind of like a Christmas tree with a lot of ornaments. Ornaments are pretty and nice, but I decided I want to minimalize everything on the outside, and learn to love myself, the plain pine tree FIRST and foremost. Then pick out the ornaments I want to focus on, such as hobbies, etc, rather than trying to force myself to fit in with the ornaments everyone else wanted for me. And also, decided to address some family issues I've always had, and just find peace with being ME, as well as with my family.

    I guess this is something I learned the hard way, by focusing so much on outside things. I would invest so much of myself into making something work (getting good grades, trying to make a relationship work that wasn't meant to, etc), that I would get so crushed when things wouldn't work out, like if I didn't get a scholarship, or someone didn't want to be with me. By that point, I think I put so much of my self-worth on the line, I stood for nothing. Anyway, no more of that. I read some quotes in a book I would like to live by this year:

    First is this: "Never invest yourself in anything so deeply that its failure would cost you your happiness."
    Second is this quote: "All it takes to be happy is to love the right things in the right amounts".

    Okay enough of me, I want to read YOUR life lessons and life goals now!! :)

  3. #3
    INFJ - The Protectors

    I've also been having some trouble with others expectations. After having managers (two different jobs) call me into their office. One told me that she couldn't believe that I was such a perfectionist and that it was a waste of both her and my time. The other told me that he had received a complaint (from a supervisor) that I was too happy and too hardworking. Unsure what to do with myself, I took their complaints to hurt and beecame burdened by these expectations. After awhile, I started to understand that everyone has different expectations and that if I wasn't meant to be there, then there are other places to go.
    By the way, your analogy was very good! It does kind of feel like being a Christmas tree!

  4. #4
    INFJ - The Protectors

    2011's life lessons:
    -Some people you gotta cut loose (I wish certain people well in their lives always, but it's best we go our separate ways);
    -I am loved and I love more than I care to admit;
    -The Universe doesn't forsake people...you just have to see the silver lining in things that initially seem completely awful.

    Life goals for 2012:
    -Get crackin' on getting licensed so that I can propel my career;
    -Not take things too personally and become more tolerant;
    -Be more assertive but still remain my tact and good manners.

  5. #5

    Life Lessons from 2011:
    -I'm better off not constantly talking/writing about problems with the ex-boyfriend who was abusive and manipulative. I'm just repeating myself at this point. Get rid of all journals/pictures relating to him. This has worked out well.
    -I can be happy with my body without being underweight.
    -I need to spend less and save more.
    -Try to understand the other person's perspective and have a good conversation about issues instead of getting really angry and demanding of the person.
    -Don't pressure relationships and they will develop at their own rate.

    Goals for 2012:
    -Get back to my "ideal" weight. (what the doctors assigned me as my ideal weight)
    -Get in better shape
    -Get more over my ex-boyfriend and be totally indifferent to his existence
    -Keep my current friendships and get closer to people
    -Make new friends
    -Learn how to clean and cook better
    -Stay stable mentally
    -Improve my painting skills and get back to the level I used to be at
    -Write more poems and finish editing all my old poems (a big task considering I have about 800 poems on my computer)
    -Enjoy Disney World! (My family is going in September probably)
    Vivid Melody thanked this post.


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