[Callie]

When I see the INFJs I know (2 males, 1 female), It seems, you're not overly sensitive.
I can say my sarcastic comments, be ironic with them (a little less with the female), they intuitively grap that this is just 2d degree humour (or even 200 degree humour) and I don't mean to hurt them or hurt anyone. They even answer with even more sarcastic comments. Or they tease me.

Well, I am used to feeler who over-react to anything they would judge non politically correct. It seems that INFJs even like to be non politically correct (as long as they know, it was not intended to be mean and that it was just some funny off the wall comments). Am I right ?



PS : Sorry for the mistake in the title thread, if anyone can fix this....

[TxWolves]

It would hurt me more to hear you call yourself a name than if you called me a name.

[Hastings]

There is a lot of sensitivity, which you might see when you cruise the INFJ forum. People are not shy to admit hardships, sense of isolation, etc. But we acknowledge what things to make a deal out of and what not to. I personally don't mind un-PC humor, if handled correctly.

[Vaan]

We are very emotive, but in a really different way than most types, we aren't the type that will just say something, you will be able to feel the emotion if you are intune with us, if we are really angry you will feel it hanging over you, and if we are happy you will feel great, its almost like subconscious projection ^^

But yes, as long as the topic is in good fun and dosent break anyones boundaries we are happy to be non-politically correct ^^

[Elinor Dashwood]

I can't speak for every INFJ, but I can say that while I do love sarcasm, playful ribbing, and irreverent humor, I am sensitive to other people's slip-ups and bad moods. For example, if my husband is in a bad mood, the first thing I assume is that he is upset with me, or barring that, that there is at least some way I can influence his mood. Another example: if someone is perfectly polite to me, always neutral in mood, but clearly doesn't want to be my friend, my feelings get hurt, because I start thinking they actively dislike me, when it may just be that they really don't think about me that much, because Hello! I'm not a sparkly unicorn and not everyone is going to be enamored of me. If a close friend is going through a tough time and chooses not to confide in or lean on me, I can be sensitive and self-centered enough to feel hurt by that. I also pick up on fake "niceness" and backhanded or insincere compliments, or more than other people do, so that someone can appear to be being nice to me and I'll be irritated nonetheless, because I'll know where it's coming from. Stuff like that mostly just flies over other people's heads.


ALSO: I think many of us INFJs have, from time to time, what I call "Nobody Really Likes Me" Syndrome, in which we get to feeling sorry for ourselves and thinking that, despite the people we may have who care for us, we think Oh, I'm not as important to them as they are to me, or They don't really appreciate me, or People don't really care, they're just being nice. In my case, these thoughts are just plain stupid because I have several people who care very much for me, so I try to shake these off and laugh at myself.

[sea cucumber]

I can't speak for every INFJ, but I can say that while I do love sarcasm, playful ribbing, and irreverent humor, I do consider myself sensitive to other people's slip-ups and bad moods. For example, if my husband is in a bad mood, the first thing I assume is that he is upset with me, or barring that, that there is at least some way I can influence his mood. Another example: if someone is perfectly polite to me, always neutral in mood, but clearly doesn't want to be my friend, my feelings get hurt. If a person I consider a close friend is going through a tough time and chooses not to confide in or lean on me, I can be sensitive and self-centered enough to feel hurt by that. I also pick up on fake "niceness" and backhanded compliments, or insincere compliments more than other people do, so that someone can appear to be being nice to me and I'll be irritated nonetheless, because I'll know where it's coming from. Stuff like that mostly just flies over other people's heads.

^ yep I'm the same. Im sensitive to moods and being not liked. Everything else doesn't register. I have wel developed sence of humour the INFJ forum is quite funny I think it's a trait that get looked over. We have light hearted playful side. I-N-F-J is tricky set of cogantive functions to have and itself deeply anlaytical and not much fun. I think the lighter side dvelops for som light relife and so humour in most any form is well tuned into and very welcome. Im sure others ike me can tell the diffrence between a joke and a fun jibe and somthing more sinister.

[IonOfAeons]

I'm not sure it's specific to types. I know feelers who are pretty laid-back about the stuff you describe that has pissed off feelers you've come into contact with.

Un-PC-ness doesn't bother me personally, similar to the INFJs you've met, because it's usually clear how malicious the person is when they make the comment. It's as simple as you put it, 'they intuitively grasp that this is just 2nd degree humour', you're not intending to be cruel, you're simply making funny observations, which is something they must enjoy, the same way I do. Political correctness is bullshit a lot of the time anyway, it's so circular because when things suddenly become 'offensive to say' then the new term that replaces will eventually be seen as offensive too so it's a neverending cycle of repetition, it hounds people for being 'insensitive' for using descriptions that are only seen as insensitive because people decide to take it that way, instead of seeing it as simply a description.

It wasn't always offensive to call someone 'retarded', it was simply a way to describe someone who was mentally less developed, then suddenly it was decided that it was offensive and replaced with 'mentally challenged' or something like that. There was nothing actually offensive about 'retarded' except that it was interpreted as offensive, when it was actually just a description. 'Mentally challenged' could be interpreted as offensive too, it's just people haven't decided it is yet.

*Ahem* sorry about that... Political correctness seems idiotic to me, I feel pretty strongly about that.

[Elinor Dashwood]

It wasn't always offensive to call someone 'retarded', it was simply a way to describe someone who was mentally less developed, then suddenly it was decided that it was offensive and replaced with 'mentally challenged' or something like that. There was nothing actually offensive about 'retarded' except that it was interpreted as offensive, when it was actually just a description. 'Mentally challenged' could be interpreted as offensive too, it's just people haven't decided it is yet.

Man, I grew up calling things "retarded", (many's the time my little brother and I would yell "You retard!" at one another... ah, youth!) and though I've cut it out of my vocabulary because I would hate to hurt anyone's feelings, sometimes, I'll see someone doing something impossibly stupid and my brain will still think "That's retarded."

[IonOfAeons]

Man, I grew up calling things "retarded", (many's the time my little brother and I would yell "You retard!" at one another... ah, youth!) and though I've cut it out of my vocabulary because I would hate to hurt anyone's feelings, sometimes, I'll see someone doing something impossibly stupid and my brain will still think "That's retarded."

That's why the issue came about, people who heard the term 'retarded' knew it was a way of describing someone as less mentally developed or 'stupid' in more primitive terms, so it started being used as an insult and then once that happened the actual definition of the term got buried beneath the colloquial usage of it, so the fact that some kids used the term to insult other kids (as kids will do) was enough to make people forget that KIDS DON'T MAKE UP THE RIGOROUS DEFINITIONS FOR WORDS! They were just calling people retarded because they had their own interpretation of it, but that didn't mean it was the right interpretation. It didn't change what 'retarded' was actually meant to mean.

[Ena]

When I see the INFJs I know (2 males, 1 female), It seems, you're not overly sensitive.
I can say my sarcastic comments, be ironic with them (a little less with the female), they intuitively grap that this is just 2d degree humour (or even 200 degree humour) and I don't mean to hurt them or hurt anyone. They even answer with even more sarcastic comments. Or they tease me.

Well, I am used to feeler who over-react to anything they would judge non politically correct. It seems that INFJs even like to be non politically correct (as long as they know, it was not intended to be mean and that it was just some funny off the wall comments). Am I right ?

PS : Sorry for the mistake in the title thread, if anyone can fix this....

Perfectly right.



No, i mean it.