[INFJ] Introvert Relationships

Introvert Relationships

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This is a discussion on Introvert Relationships within the INFJ Forum - The Protectors forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Hello INFJs, other introverts, or those interested in introverts, take a look at this article. I think it sums up ...

  1. #1
    INFJ - The Protectors

    Introvert Relationships

    Hello INFJs, other introverts, or those interested in introverts, take a look at this article. I think it sums up my take on romantic relationships, or even just relationships in general. I'm sure many of you can also relate. Introvert Relationships: Love Me or Leave Me But Please Don’t Need Me (Too Much) | space2live
    Fievel, Fievel, chanteuse and 5 others thanked this post.



  2. #2
    INFP - The Idealists

    Was an enjoyable article! I agree with everything she pointed out and think she(The author) did a great job being very clear. Perhaps one of my favorite things is to just sit down and talk with a close friends or a small group of close friends. It's honestly better than any amusement park I've ever gone too(I've been to many). When we talk and are giving each other our undivided attention(meaning not doing something while we talk, just talking) I feel super energized and happy. It's the way I feel most introverts know they're loved, not by the many things done for them, though those are very important, but it's the simple times we spend with our loved ones that gives us our inner feelings of being cherished, appreciated, and loved. I hope to one day be able to carry that into a dating relationship with someone, to feel that connection that ever builds and deepens during times like that.

  3. #3
    Unknown


    I haven't been in a relationship before but I can definitely relate to what's written in the article.
    Wolf's Tale, Shea, Wolf's Tale and 2 others thanked this post.

  4. #4
    Unknown Personality

    Very true. I was in a relationship with an extrovert for half a year, now that I think back I think he might have been an ESTJ or ESTP. It was a disaster because I always needed space and he always wanted to talk, every single day and about just anything random. I thought I was just being selfish, but introverts(or anyone really) just really need their space sometimes.
    Wolf's Tale, Shea, Wolf's Tale and 2 others thanked this post.

  5. #5
    INFJ - The Protectors

    "The key to a relationship with an introvert? It must feel effortless. So full of desire and attraction that the work naturally required in any relationship is done without thinking."

    Is there someone who prefers relationships that aren't effortless, lacking in desire and attraction?

    ---

    The article is fine for a general theme, but it isn't really introverted specific. Maybe a line or two, but most of it isn't.

    Personally, I like the strong independence of an ISTP; I love the morally strong and socially excitement of an ENFJ; I love the intellectually engaging INTJ; I love the stability of an ISFJ; I love the intimacy of an INFJ. I like someone who clings to me as much as I cling to them, and who can be without me for a time as I can be without them.

    I like a relationship to be effortless, but I also like to work at it, and know that my loved one is going to work at it too, because they want to.
    chanteuse, chanteuse, tennischick2002 and 7 others thanked this post.

  6. #6

    Quote Originally Posted by Ocean Eyes View Post
    I haven't been in a relationship before but I can definitely relate to what's written in the article.
    I would have to say the same as well though I have been close to having one. Most of what was said is what I feel like I would need in a relationship.
    Shea, Shea, Shea and 3 others thanked this post.

  7. #7
    Unknown

    The pain of being an ambivert is that I can't stand true extroverts (draining) and I am a wee bit needy with a true introvert (lacking together time).

    Thank you for sharing the blog. The comment section is very insightful. One guy described his relationship that mirrors mine so closely it was a bit shocking to read.
    Last edited by chanteuse; 01-31-2015 at 12:35 PM.
    Shea, Shea and Shea thanked this post.

  8. #8
    INFJ - The Protectors

    @Antipode I agree that no relationship is effortless, but some are easier than others depending on the balance of work/reciprocation of each partner and the ease/willingness of understanding/accepting how the other person operates. For example, it requires me less effort to maintain healthy relations with my closer and lower maintanance friends than acquaintances that I need to go out of my way for if I were to establish a deeper relationship. My closest friends are usually autonomous (but not extreme) introverts, while any of my extrovert friends tend to leech more energy out of me, though this could also do with the particularly needy nature of one of my extravert friends to always need to be doing someone and always need company. Not that all people don't need some space, but I think how the space time is used is different for introverts and extraverts. Introverts are more likely to use that time in solitude while extraverts are more likely to use that time to draw energy from other sources (other people). Like @chanteuse , I consider myself somewhat of an ambivert, so space apart would likely be more of a balance of socializing with others and reflecting alone. Does that make more sense? I agree on your pointing out hat particular point in the article, but that doesn't invalidate the other points made in this article.
    chanteuse, chanteuse and chanteuse thanked this post.

  9. #9
    INFJ - The Protectors

    @Shea , I wasn't saying no relationship is effortless.

    I was saying of course everyone wants an effortless relationship--that's not introverted exclusive.
    Shea, Shea and Shea thanked this post.

  10. #10
    INFJ - The Protectors

    Quote Originally Posted by Antipode View Post
    @Shea, I wasn't saying no relationship is effortless.

    I was saying of course everyone wants an effortless relationship--that's not introverted exclusive.
    Yes, but how to go about trying to do that is different for introverts/extraverts and whatever other distinctions are out there.


     
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