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Goth INFJs

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11K views 31 replies 30 participants last post by  arcticfox 
#1 ·
I know that a lot of people discard the term "goth" as some derogatory name tag for what they perceive to be a fashion trend, but I feel like a goth deep down, and I don't keep it a secret. I'm just wondering if there are any INFJs who identify within gothic culture and the like. So... speak up! :proud:
 
#4 ·
I've know a couple of goths well, one of them I liked and respected, the other I only liked. The one that had my liking and my respect was a goth because he geuinely wanted to be in and of himself - it was what he felt he was. His clothes were gothic because he liked them, he would have worn them even if there were no other goths on the planet, and while he predominately spent his time with other goths he did so because they had a lot in common, rather than from a need to conform to them.

The other goth i knew I did not respect, because although she disguised her gothicness as 'individuality' she in fact simply wanted the safety or identity gained from conforming to the standards of a group. She talked as if she was some 'rebel against the system' yet in reality she was desperate for the approval of her new system and its members and she looked like a goth because she saw it as the 'necessary uniform of the tribe' rather than because it was her individual preference. All because of her insecurities about who she was as a person.

I can identify with Gothic culture when it's the choice of the individual and is an expression of their own exploration of their interests and identity and preferences (even tho as a style as such it's not my thing - I prefer 'smart casual'), this seems both a healthy and a natural thing to me, but I dislike it when it just becomes another 'group' of people trying their hardest to conform to the required norms, and disolving any true traces of personal choice and individuality from their appearance or actions.
 
#5 ·
I'm attracted to goth. In high school I hung around them but didn't buy all the black clothes with chains and such that they went all out with. Sometimes I wore all black clothing like a ninja goth, but I didn't hang around them when I did it. It's like why an artist would wear black, to take attention off him/herself to observe the colors of the world. They present themselves as an interest in that I'm often unsure if they are uncomfortable, so they are being the way they are, or if their mentalities are actually stable behind their actions and choice of clothing.
 
#7 ·
I was into the goth scene for years. I still dress in black and still occasionally listen to goth music (though my tastes have expanded considerably over the years) though I don't really hang out in the "scene" anymore.

I don't know if it's an INFJ thing, though. When I hung out in that scene, a lot of the people I met seemed like ENFP, INFP maybe ENTP. There might be the occasional INFJ, but I don't think we're a majority in that crowd.
 
#9 ·
My friend is a big bad goth teddy bear but we think he's an INTJ. It would be more likely for INFJs to be goth since there is usually a psychic bond with them and a lot of them seem to be really into the paranormal which is two things that tend to revolve around the gothic subculture.
 
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#10 ·
Yeah--I really identify with the goth and emo subcultures even though I'm not a part of either, don't dress that way, and don't listen to the same kind of music. I was trying to explain it to my mom and she didn't really understand.

What attracts me to them is that it seems like they're both kind of about exploring and openly expressing forbidden, dark, socially/personally unacceptable feelings.
 
#11 ·
i like colours too much and i am too much of a gay to be goth
but there are times when i wear jet blacks - but more to pursue it as a colour
somehow i wear white not so much.. i like white as a light but not so much as a garment that often
i like black colours with other prime colours and i love the sort of transparency and depth and contrast that comes from it but again, im too much of a colourful gay person >_< i'd rather look like a kermit than a goth .. :-0 with all due respect
 
#13 ·
Wonderful topic :laughing:

I enjoyed reading the comments in this thread. It would be great to meet some of you in person
I have also never associated myself with goth/emo culture but looking back in life, there has never been a time when I wasn't already in that 'world', the earliest memory being at age 4
and several times I have actually been told I was goth

I dont think you have to dress in black.. I find there is also something 'dark' or mysterious in white
I think the factor is in emotion, we are searching for a feeling
 
#14 · (Edited)
I'm quite attracted to goth yes, I've always loved black and I have a dark side that gets a kick out of the romantic aspects of gothic expression. I've loved the concept of vampirism since I was about 12 and it still holds true after all these years, I also like werewolvery. I do wear black clothes, black jeans, black shoes and a black coat, etc.. but I don't do the makeup side of things, its just kind of a part of me like a few INFJ have said here. Deep down I relate to it somewhat but I wouldn't say I'm goth myself. :cool:
 
#16 ·
When i was younger like middle school, I was called gothic. I wore a lot of black.

I don't like stereotypes, so I'm pretty light about it. You can always find me wearing black nail polish. colors I like grey, black, green, blue, red, white, yellow.
 
#17 ·
I've never officially identified with goth subculture or had any goth friends. In this sense, I identified more with the dark evil empire and dystopian kind of themes, not black magic or vampire type of themes which seemed to be what goth subculture gravitated towards. But somehow several people who I knew only through the internet and who have never seen real pictures of me have asked me if I was a goth. This kind of question back then surprised me but answer was of course "no" ... however, sometimes I do look at my black jacket with red underlining and several other black clothing items and start to wonder to myself ... :crazy:
 
#18 ·
I am pretty sarcastic and detached from culture, so I think I could relate to the goth lifestyle.

I dress extremely preppy though and while I wouldn't mind talking to anyone goth - my guess is they would assume things about me before I even said a word. Perhaps this is wrong? I wish the world wasnt so rooted in appearances. :/
 
#20 ·
Even though I don't dress up like the stereotypical "goth", I still feel like I identify with the gothic subculture somewhat. I often listen to very moody music (Katatonia being my all-time favorite band), I wear mostly or all black clothing, am much more introspective in how I view the world, and more aloof in thought than most people around me. It's just something that's always appealed to me and I feel like I belong with. :proud:
 
#21 ·
You should have seen me freshman year of high school.
 
#24 ·
Hello! I'm a fellow INFJ and I've just recently begun identifying with the subculture, though I've been fascinated with it for as long as I can remember. Even as a kid, whenever I passed by goths or heard bands like the Cure or Joy Division on the radio, I loved it. I feel like regardless of whether or not there's many INFJ's who identify with the subculture, many of us have "goth" tendencies if you could even call it that. Most of us find beauty in the darker aspects of life, and many of us appreciate the creativity, individuality, and emotional rawness. :)
 
#26 · (Edited)
I used to be considered goth, but times are changing, apparently, and the music I primarily like to listen to isnt classic goth music.
So Im some kind of a fake goth, maybe a cybergoth. I dont even know anymore, because even the goths dont seem to know.

Vampire Freaks is shutting down, btw.
 
#27 ·
I've been goth-adjacent in the past. Never really going fully into it but adopting a lot of the things of the culture. Went to a festival once too, was a great experience.

These days I'm a well-behaved short-haired teacher who wears all sorts of colors. In some ways nothing has changed, in others, things have changed a lot.

I think a lot of the goth culture is actually about being yourself and accepting others in a world that doesn't often feel that same. I feel like I took a lot of those factors with me. That said, I doubt people would have any idea that I had that culture in my past.
 
#28 ·


 
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#29 ·
I was never officially 'a goth', nor any other youth tribe designation...but was listening to Sisters Of Mercy, Cure, Fields Of The Nephilim, New Model Army etc from the age of 11. (Yes, I know that 3 of those bands would have issues being labelled as such)

A friend of mine DJ'd at Europe's longest running Goth / Alt night in Camden, London, and I got in for free every Friday.

I enjoyed wandering around watching the people, but not the drunk/ drugged up / aggressive types that became more prevalent.

Still listen to trad stuff and related genres (Industrial, EBM, coldwave, post punk etc) - I post stuff I like in the 'what I am listening to thread'.

Regularly listen to: https://www.ebm-radio.de/
 
#30 ·
Yes, I was never “goth” either, but love Sisters of Mercy, The Cure, Velvet Underground and so forth and so on.

Poetry/Stories had its place—tragic and romantic writers like Poe, Charles Baudelaire, H. P. Lovecraft...

C'est l'Ennui! —l'œil chargé d'un pleur involontaire,
Il rêve d'échafauds en fumant son houka.
Tu le connais, lecteur, ce monstre délicat,
—Hypocrite lecteur,—mon semblable,—mon frère!

It is Boredom! — an eye brimming with an involuntary tear,
He dreams of the gallows while smoking his water-pipe.
You know him, reader, this delicate monster,
—Hypocrite reader,—my twin,—my brother!

~~Baudelaire, The Flower of Evil
 
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