[Mockingbird]

How can I say this without sounding like a snob. I'm a warm, affable person. But...



I seem to be easily bored by small talk, especially in groups. I meet with a small group (~15) of women once a week who share a common interest. Sometimes I find that the inane conversations are going to drive me crazy and I just don't even want to go back to the next meeting. I can "do" small talk and even enjoy it, but hours on end of it just bores me to tears. I would much rather talk about a million other things--politics, a good book, social issues, a life story, science, health care, schools....anything with some measure of substance, something either meaningful or intellectually stimulating. But the topics in this group seem to always be so vacuous.

I just not attracted to superficiality. I know how to play and have fun--no problem there, but I'm just a much more "intellectual" person than I find many people to be. OR, is it that other "intellectual" people are just not quick to be out there about it? I don't know. Any thoughts? Am I an intellectual snob?

[lycanized]

I'm gonna sound like a huge snob!!!
I feel that same way...except I'm in high school so it's somewhat expected
I really do not like talking about superficial things! Maybe for a minutes or so...that might be fine...but some kids spend whole class periods talking about stupid things like relationships(immature ones), movies, drugs/partying/alcohol, clothes, cars, working out...things like that >.<
These things would be fine if maybe they talked about the artistic aspects of movies and music and maybe if some of these things weren't exclusively talked about...with the exception of drugs, alcohol, and partying.

This is why I've said that I've had better conversations online than I have in real life lol


At the same time...I hide who I really am so I could imagine other kids do..

[noisulli]

I know what you mean... I have never been good at the small talk thing. I really just want to talk about the real things in people's lives and how they're really feeling, not the "good!" that everyone says.

Still I am guilty of the short superficial responses myself, but I think it's because people get too wierded out if I say what I really think.

I understand that people are generally just wanting to greet with these short meaning less responses, but what is so wrong with a simple nod, a wave, or looking at someone? People seem to get nervous if you don't say anything to them. I find that at work I have to say hi or come up with a silly greeting every time I pass someone in the hall just to break the tension, lol.

This is why I have so much trouble at parties because just when I feel like a conversation might become good, the person leaves or something and I am left on the sideline watching the party again, hehe.

[GroovyShamrock]

I'm the same, and it can strain some of my relationships. Most of the people I consider my best friends (people that I can have deep, meaningful and "intellectual" conversations with) live far away. I have friends near me of course, and some of them consider me to be their best friend, but sometimes I have the impression that our relationship has gone as far as it can (because of their superficiality). I feel guilty about it, but I can't seem to help it.

[lycanized]

Nevermind just ignore this post >.<

[CrimsonWing]

I'm find myself far too often in the same situation.
Sure, I don't mind doing some small talk but after an hour of talking about some stupid stuff I'll have enough of it. ^^
And even if I don't have to talk myself, those stupid guys at school almost get me to the point where I'd like to kill them - as slowly and painfully as possible and/or imaginable (<-- don't take it too serious, just kidding ^^)
Well, in moments like that I often pull my book out of my bag and space out in my "own world"

But if the conversation is in any way interesting and not about some "oh, did you hear he/she is in a relationship with ______ again?"-crap I could attracted to it and even consider to talk seriously to them

So long..

[TaylorS]

I am the same way. I hate meaningless small-talk. I want to talk about important things, not the latest gossip about who is screwing who or what some stupid celebrity is doing.

[OmarFW]

How can I say this without sounding like a snob. I'm a warm, affable person. But...

I seem to be easily bored by small talk, especially in groups. I meet with a small group (~15) of women once a week who share a common interest. Sometimes I find that the inane conversations are going to drive me crazy and I just don't even want to go back to the next meeting. I can "do" small talk and even enjoy it, but hours on end of it just bores me to tears. I would much rather talk about a million other things--politics, a good book, social issues, a life story, science, health care, schools....anything with some measure of substance, something either meaningful or intellectually stimulating. But the topics in this group seem to always be so vacuous.

I just not attracted to superficiality. I know how to play and have fun--no problem there, but I'm just a much more "intellectual" person than I find many people to be. OR, is it that other "intellectual" people are just not quick to be out there about it? I don't know. Any thoughts? Am I an intellectual snob?

you're not a snob if you hate small talk. though sometimes it's just polite to do it since it can be unavoidable.

i hate small talk because it seems non genuine but sometimes i just have to do it because i know other people are not as open as i am about myself and aren't comfortable with talking about whatever.

[lycanized]

I'd just rather learn about people...learn real things about people that they have inside them

[screamofconscious]

For me, small talk gets very old, very fast. I'm especially put off by people who expect me to conform to their ideas of enjoyment. I can get along with others...conform even but I dislike being false and resent that anyone would expect me to dumb myself down. Doing that all the time is draining and essentially a waste of my time. I'd much rather surround myself with people who appreciate me for who I am and what I'm interested in....especially on a level of intellect. I don't expect everyone to share all the same interests as me but I do expect that they respect my autonomy, as I would and do theirs. Maybe that makes me a snob. So be it.