How to explain people that u don't like to spend that much time whit them?

First of all I really apologize if this is not the topic for this forum, and for my bad english, and for this really long and unordered text.But I can't sleep anymore because inside of me is so much anger because of this.My friend is calling me every day and talking to me for at least 2 hours.And I can't stand it anymore.I try to avoid it-no efect, and I try to tell her that I don't have so much time for her but she finds some excuses or start to qouestion every my excuse. Or when I really can't stand it anymore and ignore her for a week she tell me that she thinks that I hate to speake whit her and like to speake whit everyone else just not whit her.And we are friends for 5 years and we are really good friends, not perfect but best yes.

I'm angry on her, and angry on my lying and pretending.And every time the telephone rings I fell so much anger even when I want to talk that time whit her,I can't help myself to not become mad and frustrated and it's honting me all the time even when she don't call me I just wait to telephone to ring.Like those mouse who were taught to hate some sound,and when they heare it they become frustrated.xD

So please can you give me some advices how to tell her that I don't want nor like to talk that often. But excuse like I don't have time, I'm studying I wouldn't be at home doesn't work because she tells me that I "must" call her after when I come back or like you wouldn't study all day and when I don't call her she calls me again hhh.how to act so tha she can get that I don't want to talk whit her but on the way that
I'm not rude. ??

We don't see each other that often ( like once on 2-3 weeks) but that's because of my school otherwise
we see e.o. more often but that don't efect on lees calling me she calls me then even more.
and how to manage to not have so much anger and not so be annoyed because of this?
do you have problems whit these extroverted people? xD(I know that she isn't like this just because of E, but i mean do you have problems whit people because of that E who can be the hole day whit people and don't get tired,hh)I also have other friend who is E and I talk to her often but it's just different because I can tell her when I don't want to talk whit her whithout any explications.

If you need more information read the text bellow but it's really long.I again apologize but I don't know anymore what to do and who to ask I don't want that she finds out because she would be angry if somebody tell her that i think all this xD

I'm finishing higschool and I need to study a lot,especially now when I have lots of test, and after I need to prepare for entering exames.I'm INFP who really need lots of time for myself. And also I'm coming home late and I
need some rest.

She is an ENFP(I'm not so sure but she is E 100%) and she don't know how to be alone.She finish her higschool, but she isn't going to college she's living whit her parents, don't have any brothers or sisters, don't have a job, don't need
to help whit hause work.(read:all day nothing to do)She mostly see her friends when is weekend and of cours throw the day but everyone need to study and she respects that but whit me is so close so she thinks that she can do otherwise. She has a boyfriend (4 years) and be mostly whit him but at night when I have time.

Problem- she calls me all the time.Every single day we speake for 2-3 hours.And she tells me the things she already told me, or smth what happend to her like I woke up dress myself, i eat, i drink milk, bla, bla, bla.And if I tell her I don't have time she asks me why, what I would do, when I would have time, to call her then after or she tells me that she needs me just for a minute and then continue talking like an hour.And I really don't have a heart to just be quiet and don't listen or comment on her storys so I pretend that's interesting so continues more and more. And now when I have test and when I answer a bit angry and not interested she ask me sometimes do she boders me and if i have time but when I say I don't she tells me that would be just for a minute and she need to tell me smth important(yeah right) and continue to talk.

And when it's weekend or when I don't need to study she calls me even more and then we talk for 2 hours and she stop to talk and me too and i say bye then and she tells me well don't hang up I have free cals be heare and continue to be qouiet and whatching tv and comment or try to remeber smth else to tell me.???wtf? and I can't stand it anymore!!!and you can imagine how it's when she have a fight whit his boo i understand that she needs comfort but not like 5 hours talking the same thing over and over every day untill they make up(and they fight a lot about some little things). And I still have traumas xD for the summer before last when she where calling me for 2-3 times a day and talking me about his Boo for 2-3 hours.and become angry if I tell her I can't talk because I sleep because she never sleep throug the
day so if she don't do it then it's not normal. and things like that.

So I sometimes avoide her calls and if I don't answer she calls me 5-6 timeson my mobile phone and on my telefone.And after 3-4 hours the same story.If I tell my mother to say that I'm sleeping she calls me on my mobilephone or after
like 2 hours and wake me up because she wouldn't have time after. !!! And mostly when she wake me up I say (half-sleeping) to my mother to tell her I would call her after ten minutes and continue to sleep and she call me angry after 15 min because she were waiting me (and she don't need to tell me smth important then just to kill her boredom!)

And important is that i really love her(as a friend, haha) and I like talking to her and hang up whit her,(but this is really too much,I'm just not that kind of person) and she isn't a boring person, but she is bored and need to do smth and of cours if she already told me everything she would start to talk about boring things and acting like that.
Maybe to you it seems that we maybe shouldn't be friends but it's really not like that, I can't imagine my life whitouth her she is my one of my best friends and that's way I wan't to fix this so that I can stop feel this anger because she didn't deserve it.she probably thinks that I'm the same person like her and also she is bored so she become selfish like all we hh, but this behavior isn't acceptable. so help me..

thnaks so much to you who read this and answer..

pardon "with" and for all the other mistakes..

I have had people like that in my life. But I eventually kicked them out of my life for the exact reason you stated. They just want to talk and take up all my time. That drains the life out of me and they don't seem to either care or don't understand. If you want to keep her as a friend you are going to have to set up boundaries. Tell her you will talk when you want to talk to her. If she was someone hanging around me she would get thrown out of my life pretty fast.

Thank you for answering.
I'm really going crazy.I don't know on what way to say you that because I can't tell her explications all the time and if I told her directly she would be mad, and think that I don't like to talk with her at all.Doy ou have some idea how to say her nicely that? uf..

Tell her and let her get mad. Maybe that would be good for her. Let her know you have boundaries.

It could be a simple misunderstanding. When people act like they don't want to speak to me, I worry I've done them some wrong, and they're ignoring me on purpose. It's personal insecurities, and I know that, but some of your friends behaviors point to her being the same way, namely her constant questioning of your "excuses" and seeming to accuse you of avoiding only her. When I get that worry, my natural instinct is to trust in it, and push even harder on the other person. I can take it so far as to get unintentionally manipulative in trying to fish out the answer as to why they're avoiding me, because I'm so convinced there has to be one, and I'm so convinced it's a negative one, something I've done to them, that I may completely overlook a truthful answer from them, pushing for the negative one I expect. Since you're both feelers, it may be better to sit her down and just explain how you feel, instead of expecting her to get the hint, because, if she hasn't gotten it yet, she's not going to. Sit her down, tell her how you feel about this, and explain the motivations behind your behavior. Not that you should have to, but if you're worried about hurting her, tell her you didn't want to hurt her, and that was a motivation behind not talking to her sooner about this, and behind trying to give off subtle hints. If it's not truthful, it's a bit manipulative, but that's one of those rare cases where I wouldn't mind being a bit manipulative, as the intention sits as acceptable with me, because it's trying to avoid hurting a friend.

The person that comes to my mind, lacks the attention span needed for reasonable discourse with others ...Not to say that they lack an attention span completely, it's just that the only thing that it's ever occupied with is their own stories, ideas and experiences. They are unreachable on any but the most simple, silly, shallow modes of communication .... preferably about themselves.

You need to set specific boundaries. Tell her you can only talk x minutes per day. Allow her to send you x text messages. Explain why. Explain to her that it is not just her. You don't have time for others either. Tell her that you can expand the time you can talk to her after a certain date.

Originally Posted by Big bad wolf

It could be a simple misunderstanding. When people act like they don't want to speak to me, I worry I've done them some wrong, and they're ignoring me on purpose. It's personal insecurities, and I know that, but some of your friends behaviors point to her being the same way, namely her constant questioning of your "excuses" and seeming to accuse you of avoiding only her. When I get that worry, my natural instinct is to trust in it, and push even harder on the other person. I can take it so far as to get unintentionally manipulative in trying to fish out the answer as to why they're avoiding me, because I'm so convinced there has to be one, and I'm so convinced it's a negative one, something I've done to them, that I may completely overlook a truthful answer from them, pushing for the negative one I expect. Since you're both feelers, it may be better to sit her down and just explain how you feel, instead of expecting her to get the hint, because, if she hasn't gotten it yet, she's not going to. Sit her down, tell her how you feel about this, and explain the motivations behind your behavior. Not that you should have to, but if you're worried about hurting her, tell her you didn't want to hurt her, and that was a motivation behind not talking to her sooner about this, and behind trying to give off subtle hints. If it's not truthful, it's a bit manipulative, but that's one of those rare cases where I wouldn't mind being a bit manipulative, as the intention sits as acceptable with me, because it's trying to avoid hurting a friend.

Yes, that's it! she isn't the person who don't listen to me or just speak about herself.I think the problem is in what you said, because she is a bit insicure.thank you, I' wanted to sit and talk with her and tell her. I don't nknow how to start, maybe to let her to become a bit angry on me and when she starts to talk with me about it how she is feeling that i don't like to talk with her than to tell her everything? what do u think?

and thank you all for answering.It helps me a lot..;)